Scars And Souvenirs
by TaruPanda
Summary: Five years after Edward's family turned their back on him, he's finally managed to get his life back on track but someone's set on destroying his new found peace and it may be too late for him to learn how to let anyone in again and ask for help.
1. Prologue  Pain And Fear

_**Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer.**_

_**Prologue – Pain and Fear**_

A piercing scream shattered the silence that surrounded them and the alley was perfectly still except for the body in the centre which crumpled to the ground at their feet. No longer held by what they had just done, they turned and ran, the crunch of their feet on the gravel steadily getting further and further away. The buildings that hid the alley remained dark, no movement came from within them and no sound escaped them as the darkness swallowed up the broken body, hiding it from anyone's first glance. The glow of moonlight illuminated the fire escape stairway at the mouth of the alley where a bird sat high up on a railing, like it had for the last hour proving nothing went by completely unseen as its sparkling eyes didn't miss a thing. It watched as the body lay still on the ground before leaving its perch for a closer view. As it landed on the ground it could now see the movements of the chest with each breath and retreated back to the safety of the stairs. The darkness slowly lifted but the bird and the figure did not move and as the sun rose everything remained still and silent, the alley being a world of its own, cut off from nearby streets and unused by the occupants of the surrounding buildings.. 

~_L_~

A young girl lay hidden underneath a bed in a dark room. She was curled up in a ball as she cried, her long curly reddish brown hair falling over her face while her hand pressed over her mouth in an attempt to muffle her sobs. Her body shook with fear and her attempt to hold back her tears while her normal sparkling green eyes were puffy and bloodshot. Her newly brought pink dress was now dusty and dirty from when she had struggled underneath the bed on the dusty floor. She knew they were still in the flat, searching for something but it wasn't her. She moved slightly to enable her to see out from her hiding place and as she did she saw nothing other than the messy floor that to her was normal. She listened hard, trying to hear anything but everything had suddenly gone quiet. She slowly uncurled and removed her hand from her mouth, allowing her cries to be audible now that she was sure they had gone. She crawled out from underneath the bed and stood up to look around. Everything was quiet and still now which suggested they had left but also meant he wasn't back yet. She flopped back onto the bed before she lifted her hand up to roughly wipe her tears away but as she sat there more followed and she turned and grabbed the nearest thing to her, a pillow, and hugged it tightly. She buried her pretty face into and cried as she took in the scent the pillow held. It was comforting in a way but in another way it only made her worse. This wasn't her room, this was his room but he wasn't here and hadn't been for a while. She was hungry, scared and alone. He should have been back, he had promised he would be and she had trusted him.


	2. Chapter 1  First Aid Ducks

_**Chapter 1 – First Aid Ducks**_

Edward rolled onto his back, a groan breaking the silence as he felt the full effect of the pain that had been inflicted on his body. He slowly let his eyes open and found himself to be staring up at the bright blue, cloudless sky. The sun was shining down strongly onto him but his body remained cold. He was dimly aware of something watching him and tried to sit up to work out where he was and what was going on. As he managed to push himself up he found that he was alone apart from the bird on the stairway that was watching him. Satisfied he was safe for the moment he dragged himself over to rest against the wall while he tried to work out what was hurting the most and what he could do about it. From what he could see, his clothes were torn in various places and were stained with blood and dirt. Pain shot through his arm as he lifted it to touch his forehead which was throbbing. His fingers came away with blood on them so he assumed that whatever had caused the cut was probably the reason why he was feeling sick and dizzy. There were grazes and bruises surrounding each wrist like something had been tied too tightly around them and he'd struggled but he had no memory of what had happened. His chest and back ached like he'd been struck with something heavy but he didn't think anything was too serious, he'd heal eventually but right now he needed to try and make his way home. He slowly managed to pull himself up to be standing, finding that being up right not only made his dizziness worse but shot pain through his back. He had to stay still for a minute, his hands braced against the wall as he tried to convince his legs to hold his weight. His vision swam and he felt like he was going to collapse but he pushed through it as he had to get home. When he thought he was as steady as he was going to get he started the very slow walk back to his flat, pain shooting through him with every step and the only thing that kept him going was the thought of what was waiting for him to come home.

An hour later and Edward finally stumbled up the last flight of stairs in his building, the lift being broken. The pain running through his body had reached an almost unbearable point with walking for so long and his head felt disconnected from the rest of him but he'd made it. He finally turned into the dingy corridor his flat was on and looked down it, seeing the plaster coming off the walls, the graffiti sprayed along them, a door hanging from its frame in the empty flat and then his flat. The door to it was a dark green colour, it still remained clean somehow but the paint was chipping from it. He had been living here for what was nearly five years now, how he had managed all that time he didn't know but he was certainly glad to see that door again now. He could hear the family in the flat two doors down from his having their daily argument and stirred himself into moving again, taking the last few painful steps to his own door. When he reached it he stood leaning against it as he dug into his pocket for his key. It took a few minutes before his fingers clasped around the cool metal of it but they finally did and he pulled it out before shoving it roughly into the lock and turning it. He fell slightly with the door as it swung open but managed to pull himself up straight again to slam it shut behind him. Relieved to finally be home he let himself slide down the door to rest sitting on the floor with his back against it. While the contents of his hallway swam in front of his eyes he could hear crying.

"Baby? Where are you? I'm back." he called out as loud as he could, which in reality was only just above a whisper. He still heard a door open though and managed to focus his eyes on his opening bedroom door and the small girl in a dirty pink dress running from it and straight to him.

"Daddy!" she cried as she reached him and dropped to the floor, flinging her arms around his neck and crying into his chest. He winced slightly as she accidently pressed some of his wounds but he didn't say anything or push her away. Instead he painfully wrapped his arms around her, holding her close into him, ignoring the flaring pain as he dipped his head to lightly kiss her hair before burying his face into it.

"I'm back baby." he whispered, feeling the last of his strength leaving him. He was home and his little girl, Lucy, was safe. That was all that mattered and the relief of that took away his fight to stay with it.

"Daddy?" Lucy asked as she felt his head flop onto her shoulder and he stopped moving.

"Daddy?" she shouted as she tried to move out of his arms to look at him, alarmed that he wasn't answering her or moving. She managed to get out of his arms just for him to fall forward and to the side.

"DADDY!" she cried, realising something was really wrong. She knelt down beside him and poked him but he didn't do anything. She started crying again, her sobs echoing through the small flat as she clung onto his arm.

"Daddy wake up!" she pleaded but he still didn't respond.

"Daddy no!" she cried weakly before she gave up and rested her head down on him as she cried and clung to his arm. She had waited so long for him to come home, she had been so scared and now he was home she was still scared.

"Daddy, wake up, please!" she whispered, she wanted him to wake up and hug her again, to make everything ok. When she'd finally cried herself out Edward still hadn't moved so she decided that she needed to do something to make him wake up. She let go of his arm and shuffled around to his head which was lying against the floor. She reached out and gently stroked his hair away from his face so she could see him better. She studied his face and saw all the bruises and the red cuts that covered it. She wanted to see him better but at the moment he was bent over and leant against the door and floor and she wasn't big enough to be able to move him so she settled for just helping with what she could see and hoping he'd wake up soon. She knew he had to be more hurt than just his face though so she pushed his t-shirt up as much as she could to see his stomach and chest were also covered in cuts and bruises. When she saw them she felt like crying again with seeing her Dad hurt so much but she knew she had to be strong for him so held her tears back and hurried away from Edward, into their small kitchen. She looked around at the mess that had been created there; everything from the cupboards had been pulled out and now littered the floor. She stumbled through it all to just in front of the sink where she could see the little green box with the white cross on the front of it. She knew that whenever she hurt herself Edward always got something from that box and it made her better so she picked it up and made her way back out to the hallway and Edward. She dropped down onto her knees by his head and struggled to open the catches on the box. Once she'd got it open, she looked at all the little packets trying to work out what she needed. She knew the larger squidgy ones where bandages and she could see the little flat packages that contained the plasters with little yellow ducks on that she always had if she hurt herself - they always cheered her up. Knowing that Edward usually did something else before he put the plaster on, she took all of those and the bandages out of the box to see what else was in it. She looked confusedly into the remaining contents of the box, trying to remember what they were; she could see some white things with green writing all over the packets, a little bottle with a clear liquid in it, some things she knew were cotton wool pads, disposable gloves, scissors and some safety pins. She sat and thought hard; trying to remember what Edward had done the last time she had cut herself. She could remember having the little duck plaster on her knee and crying as Edward hugged her, telling her it was ok now the plaster was on. She could also remember running to him, screaming that her leg hurt as blood ran down it and Edward getting up from his seat, walking to her, telling her to sit down and wait there, then he'd kissed her forehead and walked into the kitchen before coming back carrying the box she currently had open. She could then vaguely remember him trying to tear a white packet open while getting her to hold still. With that she looked back into the box and pulled out one of the white packets with green writing all over it. She sat for a while trying to pull it open before she remembered there was a pair of scissors lurking in the bottom of the box. She pulled them out and used them to cut open the packet then pulled out the contents, a damp white cloth that had a funny smell. She knew that was the right thing then, she could remember that smell. She knelt up and gently pressed the cloth to the largest cut on Edward's forehead, knowing that he did that to the cuts she had. She lifted it away and looked at the cut before doing it again a couple of the times. When the cloth was stained a murky red colour she dropped it and picked up a plaster which she thought looked the right size. She pulled the cover away from it and then carefully pulled away the backing before she gently pressed it down over Edward's cut. She smiled slightly to see him with a little yellow ducky plaster on his forehead. She looked back to the box and pulled out another white packet which she cut open and took the cloth from. She started to gently wipe the deeper cut in his right eyebrow. She was just about to stop and put the plaster on when he moved slightly and his eyes opened.

"Baby what you doing?" he asked groggily as he saw her sitting beside him, the antiseptic cloth still in her hand. She just pointed to his head before she moved forward and hugged him again.

"You're hurt." she mumbled as she held onto him and he winced slightly but again didn't push her away.

"I know but I'm ok. I just need to get myself cleaned up." he muttered in reply to which she let go off him and showed him the cloth. He then realised what it was and looked around to see the first aid box sat beside them with half the contents strewn around it.

"Were you cleaning my cuts?" he asked her, working out what she must have been doing and she nodded and pointed to his head again.

"Awww, thank you. Well done sweetheart." he said and she smiled, reassured that her Dad was ok now.

"Ducky." she mumbled and he looked to the floor to see the ripped plaster coverings and then slowly lifted his hand up to his forehead where he could feel the plaster. He then pulled himself up to be sat and reached out to hug her again.

"Thank you." he said again. He felt a bit better now than he had when he'd first made it home and he was proud that Lucy had remembered the basics of dealing with cuts and he was so glad that she was ok. He had never wanted to go out and leave her on her own but he hadn't been able to avoid it. He didn't know exactly how long he'd been gone for but he knew it was overnight and Lucy must have been so scared and then he'd come home and passed out on her. He didn't want to keep worrying her and wanted to try and convince her everything was ok so even though his body was still extremely painful he needed to get up and pretend to be ok. He let go of Lucy and she scrambled back, watching him closely as he pulled himself up, using the wall to try and support himself as he did. When he got to his feet he swayed slightly and he saw the worry in Lucy's eyes so he tried to smile.

"I'm ok." he reassured her but she didn't look convinced as she held out her hand to him which he took.

"How are you feeling? I should imagine you're hungry aren't you?" he asked her as they slowly made their way through the living room, trying to take her focus off him. She had been feeling ill for the last couple of days, she'd started to feel a bit better the day before which had allowed him to convince himself she'd be ok having a nap for half an hour while he went out to get them some food as their cupboards had been worryingly empty but somehow those plans had resulted in him loosing an entire evening and he was insanely grateful that Lucy appeared to have been ok. He would not be risking leaving her on her own again though.

"I don't feel sick anymore but I am hungry." She told him happily, she was so relieved that he seemed to be ok now. She could see he was limping slightly and was unsteady on his feet but he didn't look like he was about to pass out again.

"Let's get you some food then." he commented as they entered the kitchen. Edward looked around at the mess confused, he was sure that when he had left the house it had been reasonably tidy but now the contents of their cupboards seemed to be strewn all over the floor. He turned his gaze to Lucy who was looking up at him unsurely. It wasn't like Lucy to be badly behaved and she definitely wouldn't usually do something so destructive but he had left her on her own and he guessed she probably would have been scared and angry at him for not coming home when he'd promised he wouldn't be gone long.

"Did you make this mess?" he asked her as he crouched down to be at her height and able to see her face properly. She shook her head and Edward saw no sign of uneasiness in her eyes which was usually present when she was trying to hide something from him.

"What happened baby? I'm not angry; you won't be in any trouble." He reassured her and she glanced at the mess before looking at him with watery eyes.

"A man and a woman came but I hid under your bed when I didn't hear your voice. I think they were looking for something." she told him, struggling to hold in her tears as she remembered how scared she'd been. She didn't know how long they'd been in the flat but she'd been convinced they'd find her. She'd woken up from her nap with the front door slamming shut. Thinking it was Edward coming home she got up but had stopped at the door to her room when she'd heard voices that she didn't recognise. She'd peeked around her door which Edward had left slightly ajar earlier to see a man and woman she didn't recognise standing in their hallway talking. When she had seen no sign of Edward she'd stayed where she was and they stayed oblivious to her presence. They'd moved into the living room, the woman saying that "it had to be somewhere" and then the banging had started up. She'd snuck into Edward's room and hidden under the bed, feeling safer there as everything in that room smelt like her dad and they must have found what they'd been looking for as they had never entered that room. After telling Edward everything she could remember about it she was unable to stop the tears so he pulled her into another hug, holding onto her tightly and kissing her head. He could tell she was telling the truth and that thought terrified him. If someone had been in their flat they could easily have taken her or hurt her. He couldn't even stand to think of something like that happening to her. He was thankful she'd thought to hide and managed to stay unnoticed by who ever had been in their flat. They had nothing of any real value for anyone else to be interested in, he'd have to go through everything later and check if anything had been stolen but he had a horrible feeling that it wasn't just a random break in. It was too much of a coincidence that it had happened at the same time he'd been beaten into unconsciousness. If someone was after him or something he owned for some reason he needed to make sure Lucy would be safe, starting with reinforcing the no interacting with strangers rule. He'd taught her not to talk to strangers as soon as she'd been old enough to understand but he needed to know she hadn't forgotten it.

"You never talk to or leave with any strangers ok? No matter what they say you don't go anywhere with anyone but me." he reminded her and she looked at him a little confused not understanding his sudden seriousness. She'd hidden the instant she'd heard voices that weren't her dads in the flat but she couldn't work out if she was in trouble or not, she thought she'd followed her dad's rules when it came to strangers.

"Do you understand?" he asked to make sure as she hadn't responded to him and she nodded but he could see she was still confused and after rethinking his words he realised he'd probably come across as sounding rather short with her. 

"You're not in trouble baby, you did the right thing with hiding. I just need to know you remembered what I told you. I don't want anything happening to you. I'm so sorry I left you here alone." he said, trying to reassure her and it seem to work as the confusion left her eyes as she smiled slightly to him.

"Don't go with anyone except you." she repeated for him and Edward nodded, relieved that she was humouring him and wasn't upset.

"Good, you remember that ok. Now let's see what food we can find." He commented before he kissed her head again and stood up. He went across to the freezer, knowing there wasn't anything worth eating left in the cupboards or fridge, there wasn't really much in the freezer either as he had gone out to do the food shopping the day before but hadn't made it. He found a box with a few fish fingers left in it though so he took them out and put them on to grill. He turned around to see what Lucy was up to and found she had started to pick things up from the floor to try and help tidy up. He was pleased to see there were no signs of her being ill now. He'd been called out of work early on Thursday to pick her up from school as she'd been sick so he hadn't managed to do the food shopping in his lunch break as he'd previously planned. She'd been off school on Friday as well but had started to feel better towards the end of the afternoon so he had been fairly sure she would be ok just sleeping. He hadn't wanted to take her with him and risk her getting sick again while out so he thought she'd be better just staying and sleeping, if she had woken up he knew she wouldn't do anything dangerous as she was always so well behaved and understood what could hurt her. He'd hated leaving her but they had needed food, Lucy had barely eaten all day so he knew she'd be getting hungry soon and there was nothing in that she'd eat while not feeling well so he'd left her with a promise to be back before she woke up if she had a nap. Guilt hit him as he thought about that broken promise and how scared and worried she must have been, he'd have to think of something good to make it up to her. He wanted to start by helping her put things away but now that his panic over someone being in the flat had started to wear off, his body was beginning to hurt too much to let him help. The best he could do right now was get her settled down with her fish fingers and then try to sort himself out and with that plan in mind he turned to the cupboard on the wall above the sink where he kept things he didn't want Lucy to be able to get in search of painkillers but found it was completely empty. He sighed realising that they were probably buried in the mess on the floor somewhere and there was no way he felt like bending down to search for them. He was just shutting the cupboard door when he felt Lucy tugging on his jeans so he looked down to her and saw she was holding out a small cardboard box to him causing him to smile.

"Thanks Lucy." he said and she grinned as he took the painkillers from her. She didn't know what they were but she knew she wasn't allowed things in boxes like that so had given it to him to put away. She went back to her tidying but kept an eye on him as he took the pills and moved around the kitchen, finding her a plate and knife and fork along with the half empty bottle of tomato sauce. She could see his steps weren't easy and he was stumbling and wincing quite a bit. She knew he wasn't ok like he said he was but she also knew why he said it. She knew it was just to make her feel better so she pretended like everything was fine and tried to help by tidying up and being good. She was normally like that anyway as she could tell things were hard for Edward. She had never had anyone other than him but she had never wanted anyone else either. He had always tried to do his best for her and she knew that and loved him for it. She knew from school that other children had mums and large families and all the toys that they could want and even though she didn't have it she still didn't want it. To her Edward was better than all those things. She could tell he wasn't always happy which was why she tried so hard to be good. She'd woken up several times at night, gone to find Edward and when she had, found him sat staring at old photos and silently crying. He'd never be like that in front of her though, he tried to hide it but even though she was only five she could still see it.

When the fish fingers were cooked Edward slid them onto Lucy's plate and squirted a large amount of tomato sauce on the plate beside them.

"Do you want to eat this in the living room?" he asked her and she smiled.

"Ok." she replied happily while putting down the box of washing powder she had just picked up from the floor onto the table. Edward carried her plate through to the living room with her following and saw that that was also in a mess. Lucy sat herself down on the sofa though so Edward handed the plate to her then turned the TV on before going back to her and resting the back of his hand against her forehead. She looked up at him with a smile as he found her temperature was back to normal.

"Feeling better?" he asked her and she nodded so he found himself smiling. "I'm sorry I didn't ask sooner."

"It's ok. Love you Daddy." She responded so he kissed her head.

"I love you too baby. You eat those and I'm just going to go and sort myself out, I'll be in the bathroom if you need me." he told her and she nodded so he walked out of the room and to their small bathroom. As he stepped into it he saw that they hadn't messed it up, it still looked the same as when he had left it. The blue wall paper was still mottled with mould and peeling away from the wall in places. Some of the white tiles were still cracked and Lucy's bath toys still sat in their place along the edge of the bath. Edward picked one of them up and smiled slightly as he sat down on the edge of the bath and looked at the small yellow rubber duck. He could remember countless times when she'd played with it, splashing around and soaking him as she did. She loved ducks. He didn't know why but she always had, she had quite a few things with little yellow ducks on, including her rain coat. When he was first given her he thought she had ruined his life but now his life centred around her and he loved her so much. She was all he had and he was all she had. He wouldn't give her up to anybody now even if five years ago he would quite happily of handed her over to anybody just so he could have his life back. He regretted feeling like that now, she was a lovely little girl, people always said that, she was kind and polite to everyone and to Edward she was the prettiest little girl that ever existed. He put the duck down as he remembered what he had come into the bath room for and forced himself to stand up. The pain killers were beginning to work but he could still feel most of the pain. He looked at himself in the mirror above the sink and nearly laughed at the sight of the plaster Lucy had put on him. It stood out a mile, the little duck shining out as it laid squint on his forehead. He didn't take it off though, Lucy had done well to remember how to clean a cut and cover it. He could see plenty more cuts on his face though and when he lifted his t-shirt up and pulled it over his head he found even more. He turned the tap on and placed the plug in the sink, letting it fill with warm water. He then reached up to the shelf above the sink and pulled down a plastic box filled with little cotton wool balls. He took the lid of and lifted one out before putting it into the sink. After squeezing out the excess water, he placed it over one of the cuts on his face Lucy hadn't seen to. He repeated the process until all the cuts on his face had been cleaned and then the door creaked open as Lucy poked her head around it before she came in. Edward turned to look at her and she looked up at him worriedly, seeing the full extent of the cuts and bruises on his body.

"Have you finished you're tea?" he asked her and she nodded.

"Can I help you?" she asked and he looked at her and nodded. He knelt down on the floor so she could reach his back and handed her a clean piece of damp cotton wool.

"Just press it over the cuts until they're clean but be careful." he told her and she nodded before she gently placed it onto one of the cuts on his back. She helped him with all the rest of the cuts and he was surprised at just how gently she did it, he knew she had a tendency to be a bit heavy handed with things but with this she was extremely gentle.

"Thank you." Edward said as they finished and he cleared up the bathroom with Lucy's help. "Go through to the living room and I'll come through in a minute, I'm going to get a clean t-shirt"

"Ok." she replied and then left the bathroom to go to the living room while Edward headed towards his room where his usual mess was slightly messier than normal but he couldn't be bothered to do anything with it as the pain killers still hadn't taken away all the pain but had left him tired. He dropped his t-shirt and bent down to pick up another one from the floor which he pulled over his head. He then left his room and went back through to the living room where he sat down on the old sofa next to Lucy who moved closer to him. He looked down at her before he picked her up and placed her down on his lap, wrapping his arms around her as she cuddled up to him. He watched her for a minute then ran his hand through her hair, causing her to look up at him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be gone for so long." he told her but she just smiled slightly.

"It's ok, I love you." she said and he smiled back.

"Love you too baby." he replied and she settled back against him. She liked it when he called her baby, which he often did. Only he called her that and it always made her happy or calmed her when she was upset. They sat watching TV for the rest of the night until Edward decided Lucy should be in bed and he wanted to go to sleep too.

"Come on, bed time." he told her and Lucy stirred slightly on his knee to look at him.

"I want to stay with you." she said to which Edward smiled and lightly kissed her head before he stroked her hair away from her face as she watched him.

"Go and get your pyjamas on and we'll both go to bed." he said and she grinned knowing what he meant by that. She climbed down from his knee and ran off to her room as Edward slowly got up, feeling pain rush through him from moving. After turning off the TV and light he went into his room where he kicked off his trainers then took his jeans and socks off, letting them fall in a heap on his floor. He then went to check how Lucy was doing but when he opened the door she was already stood there, dressed in her pink and white checked pyjamas.

"Come on then." he said, opening the door wider to let her come in. He followed her over to the bed where he pulled the quilt back and she climbed in waiting as he got in too. As he pulled the quilt back over them she cuddled up to him and he wrapped his arms around her holding her close to him as they both fell asleep.


	3. Chapter 2 Toy Shop Apologies

_Hi, I'm still trying to work out how to post on this website so if formatting is off I'm sorry...I'll get the hang of it eventually I hope._

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><p><em><strong>Chapter 2 – Toy Shop Apologies<strong>_

The next morning Edward woke up aching all over and since Lucy was still fast asleep curled up in his arms he didn't bother moving straight away. He watched her sleeping peacefully while he stroked her hair back from her face before lightly kissing her head. He was intending on spending the whole day doing whatever she wanted. He knew they needed to get some shopping but while they were out he was going to buy her a treat, even though money was tight he thought she deserved it.

An hour later and Lucy was only just waking up. Edward had already gotten up and managed to collect up all their washing and put it on before starting to try and clean his room up a bit while he waited for Lucy to wake up. He'd taken some more pain killers as soon as he'd gotten up and they were working so he didn't feel too bad, he still ached but not enough to get in his way for the time being.

"Daddy?" Lucy asked sleepily as she sat up, rubbing her eyes, Edward looked up from where he was sat on the floor, folding some clothes and smiled.

"Morning sweetheart," he said cheerily, carefully standing up. "Want a hug?" he asked as he walked across to the bed with his arms open. She nodded and scrambled out from under the covers to crawl across the bed to him. When she reached him he wrapped his arms around her and she put hers around his neck and kissed his cheek making him laugh slightly. As he laughed she watched his face and she could see all the purple bruises showing up brightly on his pale skin. She moved her arm from around his neck and touched one of the bruises on his face curiously, noticing that he winced.

"Don't touch them darling, they hurt." he told her and she studied him for a minute before smiling slightly.

"They need kissing better." she announced brightly, Edward always kissed her cuts and bruises better.

"Nah, they're ok." he responded, hoping Lucy would stop focussing on him being hurt but she shook her head.

"Nope, they need kissing better." she replied stubbornly and with that she kissed every one of the bruises on his face and he stayed still to let her, knowing she wouldn't be happy until she'd done it.

"There." she said happily once she'd finished. "All better."

"Yep, all better," he echoed her and she smiled. Glad she seemed satisfied that he was ok now he smiled back at her and picked her up.

"We've got to go out and do some shopping." he told her as she leant her head against his shoulder.

"Ok" she commented as he carried her through to her room.

"You get dressed then and I'll see if I can find something for breakfast." he told her to which she nodded and happily headed towards her wardrobe. Her room was painted pink; it was the only room Edward had ever managed to decorate. It was now littered with soft toys and had a small pink wardrobe stood in one corner which had a few dresses leaking out from the partly open doors. Lucy was a very girly girl. She loved pink and she loved dresses. It took ages to convince her to wear anything that wasn't a dress on the rare occasions Edward would try to get her to wear shorts or trousers. She pulled out one of her favourite dresses, it was white and at the bottom of the skirt was an embroidered yellow duck. She loved it and wore it as often as Edward would let her. She took her pyjamas off then pulled the dress down over her head. She needed Edward to fasten the buttons at the back of it so ran out of her room and into the kitchen where Edward was sat. He saw her come in and smiled.

"That dress again." he commented as she ran to him and turned so her back faced him letting him do up the buttons. "Do you know where your hair brush is?" he asked when she was all buttoned up.

"Nope." she answered as she turned round to face him.

"Ok, you go find that and I'll make pancakes for breakfast." he told her and she grinned as she loved pancakes. Edward watched her skip out of the kitchen before he stood up and turned to the cooker. He was making pancakes because the ingredients for them were the only things he could find in the kitchen that were edible. Lucy reappeared in the kitchen just as he had finished making them, her hair brush clutched in her hand. She jumped up into a seat at the table and sat the brush down on it as Edward placed a plate of pancakes in front of her.

"Thank you." you said happily causing Edward to smile again. He sat down opposite her with his own plate. He only had a couple of pancakes though, having given Lucy most of them. He watched her as she ate them, he could tell she was swinging her legs as she sat, she always did and it normally meant she was happy, although she never could sit still for very long. He suddenly remembered he'd have to ring his work to explain why he wouldn't be turning up for the overtime he was meant to do that day. His boss, Garret, already knew he was unlikely to be coming in due to Lucy previously being ill, but Garret had always been good to him so he didn't want to leave him short staffed without an explanation. He didn't like passing up overtime as he needed the money for Lucy but after the last couple of days he just wanted to spend the day quietly with her. Realising that when he turned up for work on Monday the bruises would still be present he decided he'd tell Garret he'd been mugged and they'd beaten him up, he still couldn't remember what had really happened but that was his best guess even though he still had his wallet complete with money and bank cards. He didn't want Garret to think he'd been getting into fights, he'd already had enough of false ideas about his nature getting him into trouble and he really liked his job. Lucy ate her pancakes so quickly that by the time Edward had finished his she had also finished hers and was now sat watching him.

"Do we have to go to work today?" She asked once he'd finished eating, she could remember Edward telling her he might have to work at the start of the week. She didn't mind too much when he had to work weekends as she got to go with him and play in the back room. Usually Garret would come out and play with her for a while and she liked him. She hadn't been in for a few weeks either so she wouldn't have minded.

"Nope, I'm going to ring Garret and tell him I can't. We're going to have some fun today instead. Bring your hair brush over here and I'll brush your hair for you." He responded so Lucy slid down from her chair at the same time as she picked her brush up then walked around the table to Edward handing him the brush as he turned in his seat so he could easily brush her hair. He was extremely careful as he brushed her hair, not wanting to hurt her at all and wanting to get her long curly hair tangle free. He loved brushing her hair, it was so soft and shiny and it always looked really pretty after he finished.

"There you go." he said as he put the brush down and she turned to face him. "Go and brush your teeth now while I ring work then we'll get going."

"Ok." she said happily and went off to the bathroom. Edward slowly stood up, feeling a few pains as he did, before he went through to the living room. He started to look for the phone and eventually found in underneath one of the worn cushions on the sofa. He dialled in his work's number then waited for someone to answer it. When they did he found it to be Garret and started to explain that he wouldn't be in. Garret was fine with that, but asked if they were ok after Edward told him about the mugging. After assuring him that they were both fine and Lucy hadn't been involved he ended the call and looked around to see Lucy stood in the doorway, her little duck raincoat already on and her pale pink shoes on but not fastened.

"That was quick." He commented as she came up to him. He dropped down onto his knees and started to do the buckles up on Lucy's shoes as she always had problems with them for some reason.

"Daddy?" she asked slowly as she watched him fastening her shoes.

"Yeah?" he asked as he looked up from her feet to her face, his hands frozen clasping the strap and buckle on her shoe. He could see she was thinking how to say whatever she wanted to ask which he knew wasn't a good sign. "What is it?" he asked concerned.

"What hurt you?" she finally asked and he looked down, not wanting to lie to her but not wanting to tell her the truth. He didn't want to scare or worry her. He thought for a minute before he looked back up into her quizzical eyes.

"Just some men who thought I had something they wanted." he finally answered her. "Don't worry about it, I'm ok." Lucy moved forwards slightly and hugged him. He smiled slightly and hugged her back for a minute, glad she wasn't asking anymore questions.

"Come on, we better get going." and with that he let go of her, finished buckling her shoes then went to get his trainers and jacket on. When they were both ready they left the flat, walked down the corridor, three flights of stairs to the ground floor and stepped out onto the street.

"Remember not to let go of my hand." Edward reminded Lucy and she looked up to him, smiling and nodded. They walked through the busy streets until they came to a large toyshop where Lucy stopped to look in the window at all the toys. She loved this shop. Edward always stopped there for her but they hardly ever went in and Lucy didn't complain about it. This time though she got a surprise.

"Come on, we'll go in here then go and get the food." he said after they had been looking at the window for a while to which Lucy grinned and dragged Edward into the shop before he changed his mind. They walked down the rows of tall shelves, all full of toys, Lucy looking up at them all continually grinning. Edward watched her face as she looked at all the toys and smiled at how happy she looked. He knew exactly what it was they were in the shop to get. There was a doll Lucy had wanted for a long time but had never actually asked for. She never did ask, she wasn't like other children in that way. Whereas he had seen other children whine and moan until their parents gave in and brought them whatever it was they wanted Lucy would just look at it in the shop windows and admire it but she would never ask for it. Edward didn't know why she was like this, he'd never taught her to do that but he was thankful for it as he hated not being able to get her all the things she wanted and he would have felt terrible having to refuse her. Edward suddenly realised that the tugging on his hand as Lucy eagerly looked at all the toys, pulling him along with her had stopped. He shook his head slightly and looked down at Lucy to see she was looking at a doll he recognised on the third shelf. It was a life like baby doll dressed in a pink baby grow and wrapped in a blanket. It came with its own bottle and a dress along with a bib and toy nappies. This was the doll that Lucy had wanted for ages and the one Edward had decided to buy for her to make up for the last couple of days. Lucy didn't say anything as she just stood looking at the doll. She was just about to move on from it to look at all the other toys when she saw Edward reach out to the shelf and pick up the box with the baby doll in it. She looked up at him, her eyes wide with surprise and when she saw he was smiling she couldn't help but break into a large grin. They looked through the rest of the shop but Lucy wasn't interested in anything other than the box in Edward's hand. She couldn't believe she was getting that doll, it had been something she had loved from the first time she had seen it but she had never dreamed she would actually get it. As they stood in the queue for the check out Lucy was still smiling and now jumping about slightly, too excited to be able to stand still. Edward watched her and laughed slightly, glad to see her that happy. Finally it was their turn to be served and he paid for the doll then handed the bag it was put into to Lucy to carry. As they left the shop Lucy held tightly onto his hand and in her other hand she held the bag just as tightly as she skipped along beside him on their way to the supermarket. When they reached it Edward picked up a basket and they started to look through all the aisles, finding the things they needed. Lucy helped Edward pick out various things they needed and a few things that she really liked. Edward chose all the lowest price brands of the items they wanted except for some shaped spaghetti and a particular type of cereal that Lucy loved. He always let her get those and today was no different. After Edward thought they had enough food for the week they went to the check out and Lucy helped him to put it all into bags. Once everything had been paid for Edward picked up all the bags in one hand and took hold of Lucy's hand with the other. All the way home they talked to each other, Lucy telling him of the games she was going to play with her new doll and what she was going to call it. By the time Edward was unlocking the door to their flat Lucy had decided to name the doll Alicia and couldn't wait to play with it.  
>After telling Lucy he was going to put the shopping away he continued on into the kitchen to unpack the carrier bags he had while she sat down in the living room with her doll.<p>

Lucy didn't open the doll straight away; first she unbuttoned her coat and sat it neatly on the floor beside her. Then she pulled the bag towards her and took the box out from it. She sat for a while trying to get into it but couldn't so she decided to wait until Edward came back through to the living room. She looked at the doll in its box, thinking about what she'd do first with it when she was broken from her thoughts as she heard Edward sit down on the floor next to her.

"You need a hand?" he asked and she nodded and handed the box to him.

"Thank you." she said as she watched him pull the box open and undo all the plastic ties to get the doll and it's accessories out. Once out he handed it all to Lucy who cuddled the doll then crawled up onto his lap. He smiled and ruffled her hair causing her to look up at him.

"Do you like it?" he asked and she grinned and nodded.

"Thank you." she said again then put the doll down in her lap and hugged Edward causing him to hug her back and kiss her forehead.

"Do you want me to play with you?" he asked and she smiled even more and nodded. They spent the rest of the day playing with the doll; Edward telling her how to look after it as if it was a real baby and he also found some of the things Lucy had had when she was a baby, like a carry cot and some blankets for her to play with her doll with. As the evening came to an end Edward was lying on his side on the sofa being careful not to move too much as Lucy was asleep next to him, cuddling her doll, and he didn't want to wake her. He had one arm loosely around her to stop her from falling off the sofa and he was absentmindedly playing with her hair as he watched TV with the sound on low. He knew he should have put Lucy to bed quite a while ago but he didn't want to wake her. She had school in the morning though so he'd have to put her to bed soon but he was content with letting her stay where she was for a little while longer. They'd had a nice day playing with her doll and it had certainly made her happy which he was glad about. He knew Lucy must have been terrified they day before when the people came and searched their flat. It still worried him that they had been there as he couldn't understand how they had even gotten in as the door had still been locked when he'd made it home and there was no other way into the flat. He couldn't work out what they'd want from searching it either. He had nothing of any value to anyone except him and Lucy and he didn't really see them wanting a nice little pink dress or a rubber duck. He'd been through everything and hadn't found anything missing so they hadn't taken anything. The only thing he could think they might have wanted by searching the flat was Lucy but they surely would have found her if they'd wanted her. Even though she had been hiding under his bed she would still have been easy to find. It was the only thing they could have wanted; either that or they had the wrong flat but it was too much of a coincidence for him to have been beaten up and left in the state he had and the flat to have been searched all on the same day. Something was going on and he had to find out what before Lucy got hurt.


	4. Chapter 3 First Impressions

**Chapter 3 – First Impressions**

Edward was woken the next morning by the steady bleeping of his alarm clock. He rolled over and turned it off, noting the display showed it was seven. Lucy had to be at school for nine, meaning they had to leave their flat by half eight. He pulled himself out of his nice warm bed to get dressed and as he moved around his room, pulling his clothes on he was glad to find he wasn't hurting quite so much today. Once dressed, he went into the kitchen and made himself a cup of coffee to drink whilst he waited for it to reach half seven, when it did he got a glass of milk for Lucy and went to wake her.

"Lucy, time to wake up" he said loudly as he turned the light on in her room. He heard her move around a bit but when he looked at her she still had her eyes closed.

"Come on baby, you've got school today." he said as he went over to her and pulled the cover back. He laughed slightly as he watched her just curl up and screw her eyes tight shut.

"Right...that's it." he warned as he leant down and tickled her, causing her eyes to snap open. She squirmed around on the bed and the room was filled with both her and Edward's laughter. He eventually stopped tickling her and she sat up, rubbing her eyes.

"Time to get dressed." he told her and she nodded. She didn't move off the bed though and just yawned so Edward went to her wardrobe and took her school uniform out from it. She just sat looking at it when he placed in down on the bed beside her.

"Come on Lucy, you're not normally this tired." He commented finally stirring Lucy into movement as she pulled her pyjama top over her head. Edward watched her put her shirt on and she was fumbling with the buttons so slowly that he had to step in and do them up for her. Once they were done he left the room to go and get her breakfast ready as she finished getting dressed. She eventually came through to the kitchen dressed but she still looked tired and her clothes were not on straight.

"Come here." he said as she walked through the door and she obediently walked to him and stood there as he sorted her out, pulling the little grey cardigan on straight and tucking her shirt into her skirt. She then sat down in the seat her cereal bowl was sat in front of and Edward poured the milk over it for her. She started to eat it slowly and Edward watched her while getting slightly concerned, she was normally really bright in the mornings and if not straight away she soon woke up. Edward got up from where he had sat down so he could place the back of his hand lightly across her forehead to check if she was ill or not, wondering if the stomach bug she'd had was reappearing.

"Are you feeling ok?" he asked her as he removed his hand, she didn't seem to have a temperature, she just nodded.

"You sure?" and she nodded again.

"What's wrong then?" he asked, "You're normally a lot brighter than this and you were asleep early last night." she just held her arms out so he picked her up out of the chair and hugged her. He kissed the top of her head as she moved her arms around his neck to hug him.

"What's up baby?" he tried, hoping the use of baby might persuade her into telling him.

She mumbled something into his chest making it impossible for him to make out what she had said so he sat down with her and lifted her chin up so she was away from his chest to make it easier to get her to talk

"You want to say that again so I can tell what you say?" he asked.

"Don't want to go." she said more clearly before she buried her head back into his chest.

"I thought you liked school." he said slightly confused, the only other days he had, had problems getting her to school were her first day and when she had been ill. She normally loved school.

"I do." she mumbled quietly and he was getting more confused by the minute.

"Then why don't you want to go?" he asked her. She just looked up at him before she hugged him again and then he understood. He stroked her hair back from her face and kissed her forehead.

"Look at me." he said and when she did, he could see her eyes were not happy. "I'm going to take you to school, then go straight to work and stay there until I come and pick you up from school. I am not going to go anywhere and nothing is going to happen to me so you finish your breakfast up so we can get you to school on time."

Lucy still looked doubtful but smiled slightly and picked up her spoon again. Edward let her finish her breakfast while sat on his knee and then he brushed her hair for her. After that he sent her to go and brush her teeth and wash her face then she was back in the hallway, dressed in her coat, carrying her little pink school bag and her unfastened black shoes on her feet. Edward crouched down and tied them for her and then they were ready to go, bang on time at twenty past eight.

They walked down the streets and by ten to nine they were stood outside Lucy's school gates where Edward was crouched down in front of her trying to get her to go in.

"Look...your friend Anna is there, waiting for you." he told her, looking into the playground to see the girl Lucy always ran up to when she got to school. Lucy looked as well and waved to the girl before she looked back to Edward and hugged him.

"Stay till bell." she asked and Edward gave in to that. He would only be a couple of minutes late for work and it would make her feel better so it would be worth it. He didn't think Garret would mind too much, he was pretty lenient when it came to things involving Lucy.

"Ok, I'll stay here until the bell rings if you go in now." he told her and she nodded and kissed his cheek.

"Wait inside the gates for me tonight ok?" he reminded her as he always did and she nodded.

"Bye bye." she said as Edward straightened up and she ran in the gates.

"Bye." He called after her and she turned and waved before she went up to her friend. As he stood by the gates like he said he would he watched her and saw her point to him making her friend look at him, they were both smiling and he smiled back and waved to them.

"I think your little sister's friends with mine. I'm Bella by the way." A girl's voice said from next to him and he looked to his side to see a girl of roughly his age with long wavy brown hair, a pale complexion and warm brown eyes looking at him. He'd seen her before at the school gates and after feeling a strange pull towards her that made him want to start a conversation with her the very first time he'd seen her during Lucy's first week of school, he'd made sure he kept his distance and did his best not to look out for her. He'd been very successful in his plan to stay away from her as she hadn't noticed him before and always seemed to be in a hurry but now she was standing next to him and smiling at him. Her name suited her as he couldn't help thinking she was beautiful as he looked at her. She wasn't wearing much make-up and she was dressed in dark jeans and a fitted blue t-shirt that could be seen under her open black jacket. She was slim and couldn't have been much taller than five foot four. All in all she was everything he liked in a girl and that strange feeling was even stronger with her standing right next to him so he forced himself to look away and tried to ignore it.

"Edward and she's not my sister" he said as he looked back to the two girls. He frowned slightly realising he'd just given her his name. He hadn't meant to introduce himself. The less she knew about him the better.

"Oh...sorry, it was just...you bringing her to school...and you look kind of similar...I just thought..." Bella stuttered as she blushed, thinking she had made a fool of herself. After glancing back to her Edward realised the blush only made her more beautiful and he had to look away again. He had to stop this now.

"She's my daughter." he told her to put her out of her misery and remind himself why looking at Bella was a bad idea.

"Your daughter?" Bella questioned her eyes wide in shock as she looked to Lucy and then back to him.

"Yep." he answered trying to sound impassive, he'd had similar conversations with most people who saw him with Lucy but he was finding it slightly harder to ignore with this girl. He didn't want her to think badly of him, which was stupid since he didn't even know her and was trying his best to avoid her. As he looked back at her he could see she was having trouble grasping what he'd said.

"But she's got to be...what, five?" she said, still obviously shocked by it.

"Yep." He repeated as he looked away and back to the girls again. Lucy had turned five the month before. They hadn't had a party but they had had fun baking a cake together.

"Oh...I just thought...you looked around my age..." she said quietly and he glanced at her to find she was blushing again. It caused an odd feeling to rush through him and before he could stop himself he was encouraging the conversation when he should have been walking away.

"How old are you?" he asked her, curious about the answer for more than just the topic of their current conversation. He was usually really quiet and kept to himself, he didn't really understand why he was suddenly so willing to talk but he felt compelled to and was finding it hard not to ask her more questions or give her longer answers which was not good. He was really going to have to work harder at staying away from her after this.

"Twenty." she answered and he felt himself smile briefly before his expression fell as he remembered why he had asked in the first place. This would not make anything easier but at least it ought to put her off talking to him.

"I am exactly your age." he told her watching as her eyes went wide again. She had really expressive eyes he noticed and right now he could see how confused and shocked she was. Oddly enough he couldn't see disgust there, but he assumed she just hadn't quite got her head around what he was telling her yet.

"But that would mean you had her at fifteen." she said slowly and he made himself look away, not wanting to see the look on her face now she'd worked it out. She mumbled something to herself which he made an effort not to catch as he spotted Lucy again just when the bell rang. She waved to him before she turned to go in and he waved back. He waited until she had gone into the building before he turned and walked away, leaving Bella standing staring after him as he tried to forget their meeting completely. He didn't need to be haunted by yet another disappointed set of eyes, especially not her pretty brown ones. At least she wouldn't be talking to him again and he could go back to keeping his distance. She was far too pretty and he didn't need any more complications in his life.

* * *

><p>Bella watched Edward walk away and wondering if she could have made herself appear any more stupid if she'd tried. She couldn't believe that he was Lucy's dad or how she'd reacted when he'd told her. She suspected she'd probably offended him and that was the last thing she'd wanted to do. Her little sister, Anna, was going to kill her. Anna had been pestering their mother for a while now to have Lucy come over after school one afternoon to play. Renee, their mother, hadn't been too keen as they knew nothing about Lucy or her family but with the continual pleading she had given in and had given Bella the task of speaking to what they thought was Lucy's older brother. They'd both seen him dropping Lucy off at school and had made the automatic assumption that he was her brother based on the fact he looked to be Bella's age. Bella hadn't been too put out when Renee had asked her to talk to him as she'd noticed him the very first day she'd taken Anna to school and had been instantly attracted to him. He was tall, she guessed he had to be at least six foot, had a very angular jaw and striking cheek bones with hair that always seemed to be tousled like someone had run their hands through it and was the same odd shade of reddish brown as his daughters. His eyes were a bright green which always seem to light up and sparkle as he spoke to Lucy but tended to look tired at any other time. His well worn jeans always sat low on his hips and he usually wore band t-shirts and an old leather jacket. She hadn't been the only one at the school gates who had noticed him, she'd seen a lot of the younger mums and older sisters watching him as they all waited for the kids to be let out each afternoon yet he never seemed to notice, always standing off to one side by himself, avoiding the main crowd. She'd always wanted to talk to him but had never been able to think of a reason too and he never looked like he'd be receptive to small talk as she'd never seen him speak to anyone other than Lucy or her teacher. Anna's insistence at having Lucy over to play had been the perfect opportunity and she had screwed it up, he probably hated her and wouldn't want Lucy playing with Anna.<p>

As she watched him walk away with his shoulders slumped, hands shoved in his pockets and eyes on the ground she knew she was going to have to try again, not only because Anna would never let her hear the end of it if she didn't but because she was curious about him now as well as concerned. She wanted to know how he'd come to have a five year old daughter when he was only twenty as well as how he'd come to be covered in bruises. When she'd last seen him outside the school on Wednesday afternoon he'd looked happy and healthy like he usually did, then Anna had said Lucy had been off school ill the following couple of days and now they'd returned to the school he was the one who looked awful. His usually pale skin was marked with ugly dark blue bruises, his lip looked as though it had been split and he had a plaster attached to his forehead, which due to the fact it was squint and had a yellow duck printed on it she guessed Lucy had helped in the clean up from whatever had happened to him. She hoped he was ok and decided she'd try talking to him again the next time she saw him, she got the feeling he needed a friend and she wanted it to be her.


	5. Chapter 4 Photographs

**Chapter 4 - Photographs**

Edward managed to make it to the large music shop he worked in on time. He'd started working there a couple of years ago and found he really enjoyed it. It paid ok, he got on well with his boss and the best thing about it was he only had to work school hours and if he needed he could work extra shifts and Lucy would just stay in the shop. She liked looking at all the CD covers, she thought they were pretty and she could stand for hours quietly looking at them so she was no trouble, Garret seemed to quite like having her around as well.

Edward managed to avoid having to answer too many questions about his weekend as although Garret seemed quite concerned about the mugging, once Edward had assured him that the bruises looked worse than they were and that Lucy was perfectly ok he let the matter go in favour of getting some work done. Edward spent most of the morning organising the CDs, making sure they were all still in alphabetical order before it picked up a bit after lunch and he actually got some customers to serve. Work kept him busy enough that by the time he was leaving to go and collect Lucy from school he had completely forgotten about his conversation with Bella that morning and was just excited to see Lucy like usual. He got there early and stood by the gates waiting and it wasn't long before the bell rang and the doors opened in a stampede of young children. He looked out for Lucy and as soon as she spotted him she ran to him. He picked her up when she reached him, allowing her to hug him.

"See...nothing happened to me." he told her making Lucy smile and hug him tighter, she'd felt anxious all day and was glad to see her dad in one piece and happy. Once she'd pulled back from the hug he put her down and took hold of her hand so they could make their way through the crowd of parents and children without getting separated. Edward felt someone's eyes on him and when he glanced up from Lucy he saw Bella standing with Anna watching him. She noticed him looking at her and smiled so he quickly looked away, remembering their conversation that morning and wondering why on earth she'd still be smiling at him.

"Daddy?" Lucy asked realising he hadn't been listening to her as she told him about her day. She looked in the direction he'd been looking at and saw Anna and her sister which reminded her of a question she'd had annoying her since she'd pointed her dad out to Anna that morning.

"Yeah?"

"Why does everyone think you're my big brother?"

Edward stopped walking and looked at her; that was not what he had been expecting her to ask, he'd missed the first half of her conversation about school and had just assumed she'd be wondering what they were having for dinner.

"What?" he asked wondering who had been saying things to her and hoping that it hadn't upset her. It wasn't her fault that their little family wasn't exactly conventional.

"Well Anna thought you were my brother and some of the others do too." she explained as Edward watched her expressions carefully. She didn't seem upset, in fact she was still smiling so it seemed like she didn't really care about what they had said, just wanted to know why they would say it.

"When did they say that?" he asked, wondering if Bella had been talking to her sister before about him and Lucy or if it was someone else. He found himself hoping that it wasn't Bella who had been gossiping about him although he didn't know why as it shouldn't have made any difference who it was.

"Today when you waited outside this morning and they saw you." She answered and he guessed that made sense, he didn't normally have time to hang around outside the gates, usually being in a rush to get to work. He was calmed to realise it was just children being curious and he couldn't really blame people for the assumptions they made about him and Lucy.

"Oh...it's just because I'm quite a bit younger than their mummy and daddies will be, I'm more the age of their big brothers and sisters." he answered as they started walking again. He hoped that now Lucy had told them he was her dad that she wouldn't get any hassle because of it. He knew it would spread from the kids in her class to their parents and he could guess what they would make of it. He'd tried his best to keep his distance from the other parents since she'd started school in the hope that they'd be left alone but he knew they'd be the main focus for gossip now. He really hoped that the children wouldn't repeat anything their parents said to Lucy, she was as protective of him as he was of her and he didn't want her to get upset or into trouble.

"I bet you're better than their mummy and daddies though." she commented happily, and Edward couldn't help but smile slightly at that. He was pretty sure Lucy was better than all the other children.

"You think?" he asked as he looked down at her and she grinned and nodded.

"Yep!" she answered while happily swinging their joined hands.

"How about we go to the park for a bit before we go home?" He suggested, feeling rather happy about what Lucy had just said and wanting to live up to her praise.

"Ok!" she cheered so they took a slight detour away from their normal route to the flat and came out into a large park. They walked around it until they reached the play area where Lucy dropped her bag and jumped onto a swing so Edward walked up behind her and pushed it for her as she told him about school. He smiled as she talked but he found his thoughts had drifted after she'd mentioned something Anna had done and Bella's smile had flashed into his mind. He couldn't figure out why she had been smiling at him but then as he realised just how much of Lucy's chatter was about Anna he guessed she was probably just trying to be civil for the sake of the girls. They'd no doubt want to start playing together after school and to do that he was probably going to have to interact with Bella. He'd just have to work out a way to talk to her and still stay detached. He couldn't let himself want to be friends with her, she probably wouldn't even want to be friends anyway but even if she did, he knew it would only end in hurt for him and he couldn't go through that again. He was just going to have to ignore how beautiful she was and his odd urge to talk to her and focus on what was best for Lucy. He could do that, putting Lucy first was the one thing he was good at. He'd learnt that early on, at the same time he was forced to grow up and fend for himself he'd had to figure out how to look after Lucy and his own needs and wants had automatically moved down his list of priorities. All in all it hadn't worked out too bad so far, Lucy was a healthy happy little girl and as of yet he wasn't too short with money. He'd had some tight times but he got by them without any damage to Lucy. He'd had to go without things and knew he always would but it didn't seem so bad when he was doing it for Lucy. He'd always done the best he could for his little girl and Bella was just another one of those things he'd have to do without. He had to be civil with her so Lucy could have a good relationship with her best friend but he had to draw the line there. It didn't matter that he thought she was beautiful, it didn't matter that he felt drawn to her and it certainly didn't matter that she was the first person he'd come across in nearly five years that he actually felt curious about and wanted to get to know. None of that mattered because in the long run he knew that Bella would probably hate him if she got to know him and he'd end up hurt while Lucy lost her best friend and he couldn't do that to her so civil acquaintances they would have to remain.

"Dad!" Lucy's voice shattered through his thoughts and he looked to her to see her looking at him and he guessed she'd been trying to get his attention for a while. Dad was a name she only used out of desperation when he wasn't listening.

"Sorry." he said and saw her face soften slightly as she knew she had his attention now.

"I want to go on the slide." she told him to which he nodded and stopped the swing, allowing her to get off. She ran across to the slide leaving him to pick up her bag and follow her - which he did. Edward let her stay playing for half an hour before he decided they should go home and they spent the rest of the evening doing Lucy's reading homework, playing games and watching TV. Edward tried to appear happy for Lucy, smiling and chatting with her all night but his thoughts wouldn't stay on track. Even though he'd made his decision about Bella he couldn't help wishing that things could be different and it angered and frustrated him that he felt like that. He tried hard not to wish he had the things he'd lost and he'd been doing well at that in recent years but the appearance of Bella seemed to have torn down some of the mental walls he'd built up. It wasn't just the possibility of a friendship with her that he couldn't ever have but the friendships and family that he'd already lost that were haunting him throughout the night. He wished he could just shut his brain off and focus on Lucy but that wasn't happening, instead after he'd put Lucy to bed he found himself pulling out the old box of photographs he usually kept hidden under his bed. He knew it would bring him nothing but heartache but he needed to see them again and it would help remind him why staying away from Bella was for the best.

Lucy woke up only a couple of hours after she'd fallen asleep feeling unsettled. She couldn't remember having a nightmare but something didn't feel right, something was wrong with her dad. He hadn't been happy the whole night, she could see he had tried to be for her but she knew it was fake. Unable to get back to sleep she decided to get up and find him to make sure everything was ok and get a hug. She found him in the living room, sat on the sofa with just the lamp on. He was bent over looking at photos that he had taken from the box sat in front of him on the floor. She'd normally go to bed again when she saw him like that but this time she was too curious to know what was wrong. She quietly entered the room and climbed up on the sofa beside him. He looked up when he realised she was there and she could see his eyes were still sad and closed over. She could also see a tear making its way down his cheek which he made an attempt to quickly wipe it away before she saw but it was too late. He was sat back now so Lucy crawled onto his lap and hugged him. He hugged her back and buried his face into her hair.

"Thanks." Edward muttered as he pulled away from the hug. Lucy settled down in his lap with his arm around her and she looked at the photo that he had held in his other hand. She could see what looked like a family in it and she could definitely see Edward stood there, looking slightly younger than he did now. Standing beside him was an older looking boy who was much larger than Edward, he had darker hair and blue eyes but their faces had a similar structure to them, then there was a younger girl with the same dark hair and blue eyes. Lucy liked the look of her; she was tiny and very pretty with her smile lighting up her face. The man at the back of the photo was obviously where the blue eyes and dark hair came from along with the angular jaw line and cheekbones which were so prominent in the Edward Lucy knew. In this photo however he had a little more weight to his face which softened it and made the similarity to the other boy clearer. The woman who stood with her hands on Edwards shoulders had the same green eyes and reddish brown hair as both Edward and Lucy and her smile was identical to that of the girl. They all looked so happy together.

"Who's that?" she asked pointing to the photo making Edward glance down at it before he looked back to her.

"They're my family, your family." he muttered finally deciding to explain it. He knew she'd seen him with the photos before but he'd never felt able to explain them to her and hadn't been sure whether she'd understand or just get confused. She was old enough now to at least understand the basics.

"That's my brother, sister and parents. Your uncle, aunty and grandparents." Lucy looked at him closely then, he had never spoken about family before. She could tell this had something to do with what upset him and as she studied his face she could see more tears forming in his eyes.

"Where are they?" she asked looking away from his face and back to the photo, not wanting to see him cry anymore. If they meant so much to him she didn't understand why she'd never met them and she didn't like that thinking about them upset him so much. They all looked so happy together in the photo. Edward just shrugged.

"I don't know, they haven't spoken to me since I was sixteen. I've not seen them since then." he told her as he put the photo down, unable to look at their smiling faces anymore.

"What were they like?" she asked and Edward started to tell her about them and some of the good memories he had. Lucy watched him as he spoke and could see he was getting more upset.

"I wish I could meet them." she said when he stopped talking, he just pulled her in closer to his chest and hid his face in her hair, she knew he was trying to hide his tears again but said nothing.

"I wish you could too baby." he muttered and she just hugged him back tightly. Eventually he took a deep breath before pulling away and plastering a smile on his face before he showed her some more photos, some of his family and others of old friends. He explained about some of them too until he noticed Lucy was falling asleep on him and he realised just how late it was.

"Back to bed I think." he commented and Lucy nodded sleepily, allowing him to pick her up as she leant her head against his shoulder. He carried her through to her room and put her down in her bed. He pulled the covers back around her and lightly kissed her forehead before she was asleep and he turned the light off. He left her room and went back to the living room where all the photos were still out. He started picking them all up and placed them back into their box until he came to the last one and he stopped to look at it again. It was the first one Lucy had seen. He wondered what the people in it would think of him now. The time the photo had been taken they'd all loved him like a family should, a year on from this and his brother and sister both freaked out on him as his mum and dad shouted at him before he was thrown out and told never to come back as he was a disgrace. He wondered if the five years separation would have made any difference to them. He couldn't see how they could say he was a disgrace anymore, not after everything he had managed by himself. He wanted to go back to them, he wanted to just be able to walk into their house along with Lucy and be accepted back into the old hugs as if nothing had ever happened. He threw the photo back into the box though as he realised that could never happen. Apart from the fact he no longer knew where they lived he doubted that they would ever have forgiven him. They probably still hated him, no matter what he had done whilst on his own. He had been exiled from his family and disowned. He no longer had a family, just memories that hurt as he remembered the past life. He looked around his dull living room and sighed. This was all he had now, this flat and Lucy and he knew that if ever given the choice of going back to his family but at the expense of not having Lucy he wouldn't take it. She was everything to him. The fact that she depended so much on him and that how she was the way she was because of him made him feel proud of her and himself. He turned the light off then went into his own room where he laid awake most of the night thinking before he finally fell asleep only to be woken a few hours later by the bleeping of his alarm clock; the same as every morning.

* * *

><p><em>AN : Before I forget to mention it, I live in Scotland, so this has been based on the Scottish Education system when it comes to the ages in relation to school stuff. I know its slightly different to schools in England and America so I thought I'd mention that incase it got confusing<em>. 

_Thanks to everyone whos reading this, I appreciate the comments and adds to favourites :)_


	6. Chapter 5 Watching, Waiting

**Chapter 5 – Watching, Waiting**

"Come on Luce, hurry up, we need to go!" Edward called from the living room as he waited for Lucy to come through from her room with her coat, shoes and bag. She came running through with her coat half on but twisted, her bag dangling from her arm and her shoes in her hand. Edward laughed when he saw her and she stood at glared at him.

"Oh come here!" he said while trying hard to stop laughing as she stomped over to him and dropped the shoes and bag. Edward took her coat off the one arm it was on and untwisted it. He then walked around behind her and held it out for her to put her arms in, which she did, and then he pulled it up onto her shoulders and round to fasten at the front. He then went back in front of her and buttoned it up before he took hold of her shoes. He put them down in front of her, and she stepped into them then he fastened the buckle. She then picked up her bag and put it on, still looking grumpy.

"There, ready to go, now smile and be happy." Edward told her and she glared at him.

"Oh come on," he laughed, "Where's that pretty smile my baby has eh?" and with that she couldn't stop the small smile that replaced her glare.

"Now that's better." he said while smiling too, glad she was cheering up. He took hold of her hand before they both walked out of the flat, Edward locking it behind them. He walked Lucy to school and once she was inside the gates and with her friend the bell rang so he left before he could even think about looking for Bella and walked to work.

It had been a crazy morning and he was glad they'd made it on time. Their late night had made them both suffer, he'd fallen back to sleep after his alarm had gone off and when he'd woken up again they'd only had forty five minutes to get ready. Lucy had tried to refuse to get up as she was too tired and had spent the morning sulking as Edward tried to wake her up and get her dressed. He was exhausted himself and he still felt a little exposed and vulnerable after showing Lucy the photos. He needed to get his head sorted and his walls back up before he saw Bella again so he banished all thoughts about anything other than work or Lucy and threw himself into his job.

* * *

><p>When it reached the end of the day Edward couldn't wait to pick Lucy up from school. He'd been bored for the last hour of work and had started thinking again. He'd managed to talk himself out of dwelling on his issues for the time being but all he wanted to do now was see Lucy's face and forget everything by just concentrating on her. As he turned down the street to the school he saw a man at the far end of it who he didn't like the look of. He looked vaguely familiar to him yet he couldn't place where from. He knew he didn't have any children at the school though as he would have recognised him. As he neared the school gates he could see that the man looked to be around his age, maybe a couple of years older. He had dirty blonde hair pulled back in a pony tail and was wearing jeans, a leather jacket and black biker boots. He looked perfectly ordinary but there was something about the way he was watching the school gates that set Edward on edge. He came to a stop in his usual waiting place and glanced at the other parents gathered there, no one else was paying any attention to the man so he thought he must just have been being paranoid. Even so he felt relieved when the bell rang and the doors opened with a flood of children including Lucy along with Anna who was following her.<p>

"Daddy!" Lucy shouted as she neared him, causing him to grin and wave.

"Hello sweetheart." he said as she stopped in front of him along with Anna who stood looking at Edward curiously. He smiled to her briefly, wondering why she'd stopped with Lucy and hadn't gone straight to Bella. After a quick glance back into the crowd of parents he realised neither Bella nor the other woman he sometimes saw with Anna seemed to be there.

"Daddy can we wait till Anna's sister gets here? She's going to be late." Lucy asked and Edward looked at the two girls, both looking at him expectantly. At least that explained it but he wanted to get home with Lucy and he could have done without bumping into Bella but he knew he couldn't leave Anna by herself, especially with the blonde haired man still standing nearby. However uneasy he was making him feel, he'd feel even worse leaving Anna there without her sister.

"Ok. I met your sister yesterday morning." he commented, looking at Anna as he said the last part trying to put her at ease as he could tell she was shy and it worked to some extent as she smiled slightly while Lucy grinned.

"Thank you Daddy. Do you like her sister?" Lucy asked looking up at him curiously and Edward shrugged. There was a hint of mischief in her eyes and he wasn't sure he was going to like where that was headed.

"Couldn't say." he answered, which was a lie. He did like her, probably too much but was trying hard not to. He'd successfully managed to ingrain into his mind that trying to be friends with her was a bad idea while at work, the family memories from the night before reminding him why he didn't make friends anymore. Luckily Lucy didn't ask any more questions so he looked up from the two girls and down the street again to see the man still standing there and now watching him.

"How late is she going to be?" He asked, looking back down to Anna. He was getting more uncomfortable by the minute with the presence of the man and he just wanted to get Lucy home, especially now that most the other parents and children had left. He didn't like feeling so exposed, even if he was just being paranoid.

"Not that late, I think she said five or ten minutes." Anna answered quietly, fidgeting with the strap of her bag and Edward guessed she was still feeling shy.

"Ok." He responded, trying to sound cheerful for her and Lucy as he sat down on the wall that ran around the edge of the playground, looking down the street for any sign of Bella. He realised though that both girls were looking at him.

"You want up?" he asked them and they both nodded so he stood up again and picked Anna up first, placing her back down on the wall then he picked Lucy up and sat down with her on his knee.

"What did you two get up today then?" he asked them as they waited. He had one eye on the man though, he had moved slightly closer and he didn't like it. He was still watching him and now Lucy too. Lucy had started to tell him about their day at school and he suddenly noticed a piece of paper was being shown to him so he looked at it and smiled. Lucy had drawn a picture which he guessed was meant to be him and her.

"Well done, it's great." he said, sounding enthusiastic and making her smile as she put it back into her bag. They were sat there for around ten minutes before they finally saw Bella coming. Anna jumped down from the wall as Edward stood up, picking Lucy up as he did before setting her back on her feet just as Bella reached them.

"Err...hi...again." she said awkwardly as she saw Edward. He was still covered in bruises although the little yellow duck plaster on his forehead had been removed. As she studied him she noticed he looked a lot more tired than he had the day before and he was looking anywhere but at her, his gaze flicking from the girls, to the school yard then further down the street before going back to Lucy. He fidgeted slightly and reached out with one hand to take hold of Lucy's hand before taking hold of her bag in the other.

"Hi, we better be going now." he mumbled while staring down at his worn black converse. Bella didn't want him to leave so quickly so she tried to think of something to say to keep him talking rather than just staring at him like an idiot. She was probably making him feel uncomfortable which was the last thing she needed after yesterdays failed attempt at talking. She hadn't expected to get a chance to talk to him that afternoon and was surprised to find him waiting with Anna. She'd warned Anna she'd be a little late as she had a meeting with one of her college lecturers but had just told her to wait inside the school gates for her as she knew there would still be teachers around.

"Urm, thanks for waiting with Anna, you didn't have to do that" she said quickly which seemed to get no response from him. He was looking at Lucy now, obviously checking she had everything she'd started the day with before they left the school. Watching them it was still really hard to believe that that little girl was his daughter. He just didn't look like the type to be so young and have a child. He also didn't seem the type to get into fights which made her wonder about his bruises. She hoped waiting with Anna hadn't been an inconvenience for him, she didn't want to give him any more reasons to dislike her.

"It's ok but we've got to go now, bye." he responded, obviously not interested in furthering their conversation as he turned around to start the walk home, Lucy waving to them as she followed. Bella watched them leave, wondering how she could get him to talk more and get to know him before Anna caught her attention by grabbing her hand so she shook herself out of her thoughts and asked Anna about school as she took her home. It was fairly clear that Edward wasn't interested in talking to her but she didn't want to give up on him and was determined to keep trying to talk to him. She didn't know what it was about him that was attracting her but she figured there was a lot more to him than just his looks and his daughter.

* * *

><p>Edward was happy to be getting further away from the man at the school gates as they walked home and he felt himself relaxing more with each step they took. He was also glad to be away from Bella, he wasn't comfortable with how closely she had been looking at him, even though he'd kept his gaze away from her, he'd felt her eyes on him. He'd also been aware that she'd been trying to start a conversation with him which he had avoided. He knew if they talked she'd be able to wear him down and he'd slip up, he was already curious as to why she'd been late and the less he knew about her the better. He just had to keep reminding himself that he couldn't let people into his and Lucy's lives anymore, couldn't take the risk of either of them being hurt and he just couldn't trust anyone not to do that.<p>

"Do you have any homework tonight?" he asked Lucy as they stepped into the flat building, pushing Bella to the back of his mind as he focused on what was important. He liked helping Lucy with her homework; she picked things up so quickly that it was usually good fun.

"Reading." She muttered, it was the only part of school she didn't really like as she found it really hard. It frustrated her as she didn't have a problem with anything else they had to learn but for some reason she just couldn't figure out the big words. The only good part of reading homework as far as she could see was she got to sit with Edward for quite a while as he helped her though it and she did love his cuddles.

"Ok, we'll do that after tea." he told her and she mumbled an ok. "Reading will get easier, it's always hard to start with." he added, noticing her less than happy attitude to it.

"I can't do it." she replied as they climbed up the flights of stairs, already getting grumpy at the thought of reading.

"Yes you can, it just takes a while." Edward encouraged as he looked down at her with a crooked smile, hoping to make her smile in return.

"I don't like it." she sulked, not being won over by the smile and he sighed slightly, it was never a good sign if the smile didn't win her over.

"I know you don't, but it is something you have to do and it will get easier." he told her and as they'd just reached their flat the conversation stopped as Edward unlocked the door and opened it. Lucy ran in and to her room while he walked in slowly and shut the door. He picked up the post that had arrived just after they had left that morning, and looked through it. Two bills, one prize draw, one supermarket savers leaflet and a bank statement. He dropped his keys back into his coat pocket as he walked into the kitchen with the post. He chucked the prize draw and supermarket leaflet straight into the bin but left the other things on the table before he walked through to his room where he took his jacket off and left it on the bed. He went back into the kitchen then where Lucy was sat on a chair at the table with her doll in her lap.

"You want a drink and biscuit?" he asked.

"Yes please!" she replied happily and Edward smiled, it appeared she'd forgotten about reading for the moment. He turned the kettle on for himself but got out the apple juice for Lucy. He poured out a glass full and gave it to her before he picked up the biscuit jar and placed it on front of her, letting her choose one.

They spent the rest of the afternoon with Lucy colouring at the kitchen table as Edward sorted through his bank statement, budget and the bills that had arrived so he could go to the bank in his lunch hour the next day at get them all paid. He was pleased to find that he had enough to pay the bills and his rent and still stick to their current budget for food shopping. It had taken him a while to get the hang of budgeting and sometimes he still messed it up. He hated the months where he made mistakes and ran out of money before all the bills had been paid. Luckily their landlord was very understanding and didn't seem to mind too much on the months he was late, he'd always pay it in the end.

After a dinner of chicken nuggets, chips and peas they went through to the living room where Edward sat down on the sofa and Lucy went to get her school bag. She came back into the living room with it and climbed onto the sofa beside Edward where she looked through her bag and got her reading book out of it. Edward then lifted her onto his knee and she settled down there, opening her book so both her and Edward could see it. They sat for a long time as Lucy tried to read the book, Edward helping her when she got stuck until she could read it perfectly.

"Well done." Edward praised her, trying to lift her now grumpy mood and it worked as she smiled slightly to him, "You can do it." he commented as he took the book out of her hands and put it back into her school bag. She didn't say anything but cuddled up to him so he leant down and kissed her head.

"What do you want to do now?" he asked, stroking her hair back from her face.

"Nothing." she mumbled, moving even closer to him.

"Awww come on baby, cheer up. The reading is done now." he said looking at her, she just moved her head so her face was buried into him and he looked down at her confused.

"What's up baby? You're not normally this clingy." he said, she didn't say anything though and all that happened was he felt her hand closing around his t-shirt.

"I'll put the TV on then." he muttered, realising Lucy was installed there for the night. He reached across to his side and picked up the remote to turn the TV on. He watched TV until eight, all the time keeping one arm around Lucy as she was holding onto his other hand, gently playing with his fingers. As the show he'd been watching finished he lifted his gaze away from the TV screen and to Lucy who was looking rather sleepy.

"Bed time Luce." he said as he yawned slightly himself, bored of the TV. He watched her slowly lift her face away from his chest to look at him. She was happy where she was and didn't really want to move but as she looked at Edward she couldn't stop the yawn that was taking her over. As she finally did yawn Edward smiled slightly. "Yep, definitely bed time." he commented.

She moved slightly on his knee, straightening up and rubbing her eyes before Edward placed both his hands just under her arms and lifted her up off his knee and down onto the floor. She stood there looking at him sleepily as he also got up and walked behind her as they moved through the flat to her room. He stayed to make sure she was starting to put her pyjamas on then left for the kitchen to pour her a glass of milk and get her a biscuit from the biscuit jar. He took both of them through into her room where she was now sat on her bed in her pyjamas so he sat down beside her and handed her the glass and biscuit. As she started to drink her milk he watched her, a small smile playing across his features and as her hair flopped forwards, getting in her way he moved to sweep it back for her. She looked up at him, smiling and he felt a particularly strong surge of love for her rush through him. She was his little girl, she depended on him for so much but he knew he depended on that dependency. The minute she no longer needed him would be the minute his life seemed pointless. Looking at her now, watching her get a small white moustache from the milk, he didn't want her to ever grow up. He wanted her to stay this innocent little girl, unharmed by anything and dependant on him. He knew though that she had to grow up but he also knew that he would be there for her, always. Nothing would ever get in the way of that. To him she would always be his little girl with the strange duck obsession; no matter what she did, he would stand by her and help her. He had made that vow to himself the night he had been thrown out. He'd thought then that at sixteen he didn't need his parents, he had hated them for the watch they had kept on him, he had wanted them to back off and leave him alone. That was all right up until the day Lucy appeared. That day he realised just how much he had still needed them and wished he had them. He knew Lucy would feel the same as he had at sixteen but now he also knew that he still had to stick by her, no matter what. He had to be there, looking out for her even if she didn't realise it. He just had to be there.

Lucy had finished her milk and had been watching Edward as he watched her with far away eyes and she wondered what he was thinking off. She took a bite from her biscuit and continued to watch him. She loved him. She had seen other parents at school and seen how they were with their children. She had compared them to Edward and compared how she was with him to how other children were with their parents and had come to the same conclusion both times – her dad was better. Edward seemed so much more affectionate to her than other peoples parents seemed to be, either that or they hid it and he didn't mind to show it. He'd happily hug her before she went into school and when he met her after it. Other parents seemed to just take hold of their child's hand and take them to a car where the child got in the back and the parent got in the front. Lucy preferred Edward's hug. She also knew that Edward put her first. She knew he went without some of the things he wanted for her. She had seen him looking at things in shops for a while before turning away from them and getting something for her instead. Sometimes she wanted to tell him to get the thing he wanted and not the other things but she knew she couldn't as he was doing it for her and somehow it seemed wrong to Lucy to tell him not to. She took another bite from her biscuit and looked at it. Edward had given her, her favourite biscuit, a vanilla crunch cream. She'd always liked these biscuits; they were a particular make that they used to be given at nursery. Edward had found out she liked them a lot and had asked the workers there what they were so he could get her them. Ever since then he had always brought them for her. That was just another one of the hundreds of reasons Lucy loved Edward. To her he was simply the best dad there could ever be.

"Right...teeth." Edward said as he jerked himself back to life and saw Lucy looking at him, her milk and biscuit finished. She slid off her bed and he stood up, taking the now empty glass from her and as she went into the bathroom he took the glass into the kitchen and picked up her hairbrush that was sat on the units. He took it through to her room and picked up a small pink bobble that sat on her bedside table then sat on her bed as he waited for her to come back through. When she did she stood in front of him and let him brush her hair then tie it into a pony tail, carefully wrapping the bobble around it without tangling it, to stop it being quite so tangled in the morning. When that was done he stood up and she moved onto her bed, crawling under her covers before Edward tucked her in. She lay on her back looking at him and he leant down and kissed her forehead.

"Night baby." he said as he turned from her and to the door. She rolled onto her side to watch him leave then as the door closed she let her eyes fall shut and fell asleep.

Edward walked back through to the living room and flopped down onto the sofa as he sighed, he hated this part of the day. He got so lonely when Lucy was in bed. He looked back to the TV and noticed it was still just as boring as before so he reached for the remote and flicked the TV off, not being bothered in watching it anymore. He then looked around the living room for something else to do. When he couldn't find anything he decided he might as well go and do the washing up.

By the time he'd finished the washing up, dried everything and put it all away it was still only nine o'clock so he decided to tidy up a bit as well. An hour later, everything was clean and tidy, there still wasn't anything on TV and he had given up on finding anything else to do he decided to just go to bed and have an early night.

After brushing his teeth he got changed into his boxers and a random t-shirt then climbed into his bed. He reached across and set his alarm before turning his light off and settling back into his bed, the quilt pulled tight around him. Finally settled, Edward closed his eyes and found himself wondering what it would be like to actually let someone into his life and have a friend again, just someone he could maybe phone to talk to or even invite round to watch TV. He'd been on his own with Lucy for so long now he had half forgotten what it was like to have friends but longed to experience that again. He fell asleep that night with the image of him and Bella sitting on a sofa chatting and laughing as the girls played in the background. It would have been a nice dream if it wasn't for the fact that when he woke up he knew it could never happen.


	7. Chapter 6 Surprise Play Date

**Chapter 6 – Surprise Play Date**

The steady bleeping of his alarm clock woke Edward up the next morning and he fell straight into his normal routine. Lucy woke easily this time, seeming quite bright and soon appeared in the kitchen for her breakfast. She talked happily to him as she ate , telling him all about the picture she was planning to draw him and the game she wanted to play with Anna at lunch.

Once breakfast was gone and she was ready Edward walked her to school and stayed until the bell again. She hadn't asked him to this time but he had spotted the blonde man from yesterday nearby again. He still couldn't place him but he was sure he recognized him from somewhere and it felt like he was missing something important. He was slightly closer to the school this time as well and it made Edward feel uneasy about leaving Lucy until he knew either she was inside. He could see none of the other parents dropping their children off gave him a second glance. They certainly didn't seem to be worrying about their children like he was at the moment and he couldn't really understand why he was, he just knew he didn't like the look of him. He also noticed that Bella wasn't there that morning but the other woman he sometimes saw was there saying goodbye to Anna. He guessed that must be their mother as she looked a little like an older Bella, with the same colour eyes and brown wavy hair only hers stopped at her chin. She was dressed in smart black trousers with a white shirt and a large loose knit beige cardigan that fell to her knees over the top with the sleeves pushed up to her elbows and several bangles decorating her wrists. She had a couple of necklaces on made from large coloured beads and a large red flower pinned into her hair holding some of it back from her face. Edward thought she kind of looked like a hippy crossed with an office worker. It was a slightly odd combination yet she pulled it off. She was smiling and waving as Anna ran into the playground. It made him wonder what it was like in Bella's house and figured it would probably be a happy place to be.

When the school bell finally rang it pulled Edward out of his thoughts and he turned to watch as Lucy went in before starting on his walk to work. As he went he could feel somebody following him but every time he turned around there was nobody there.

* * *

><p>"You're late." Garret commented the minute he stepped into the back to dump his jacket. He didn't sound angry, more curious which Edward was glad about. He'd always got on well with his boss and he didn't want that to change.<p>

"Sorry, I had to wait outside the school until the bell went, Lucy wouldn't go in unless I did." he lied, after waiting outside the school and stopping several times to check if anyone was following him it had taken him longer than he'd realised to get to work but he didn't want to tell him that. Garret looked up at him in surprise and concern, he'd never heard of Lucy acting up before.

"Is she ok?"

"Yeah, she's just a bit clingy at the moment. She didn't like it when I got hurt and she thinks something else is going to happen to me." he answered as it wasn't exactly a lie and it was better than telling his boss he thought someone was following him and was paranoid about a perfectly harmless looking man that no one else seemed to even notice at the school gates.

"Cute." Garret commented, easily believing that Lucy was just worrying about her dad. It was hard to tell which of them was more protective of the other. "You better get through the front."

Relieved Garret had accepted his excuse so easily Edward went through and leant against the counter as he looked out into the empty shop. He was bored already, yesterday had been quiet and it looked as though today would be too. He had already sorted all the CD's out and there were no new ones to put out so he was stuck behind the counter. After deciding it was too quiet he searched through the drawer of CDs under the counter and pulled one out to play. Muse soon filled the shop and he hummed along to it as he tapped on the counter, waiting for a customer to come in.

The rest of the day went pretty much like that. They only had about ten customers come in and Edward had been extremely bored so he was really happy when it was time to go and pick Lucy up. When he reached the gates he looked down the street and saw the man was standing there once again and he got the feeling he was watching him. As soon as the bell rang he looked out for Lucy and quickly spotted her heading towards him, she smiled as soon as she saw him and ran the rest of the distance, coming to a stop right in front of him with a bright smile.

"Had a good day?" he asked her as he crouched down to hug her.

"Yep." she answered happily as she pulled out of Edward's arms and took hold of his hand. "I drew another picture for you." she said looking up at him happily and he assumed it was the one she had been planning at breakfast.

"Awww...thank you baby." he smiled making her grin. As they started walking down the street Edward felt very aware that the man wasn't getting any further away. He glanced over his shoulder to see him following them and quickened his pace slightly, alerting Lucy to the fact something wasn't quite right.

"Daddy?" she asked and he looked to her but didn't slow their pace.

"Yeah?"

"What's wrong?" she asked and Edward looked a bit startled at that, she could pick up on his moods way too easily. It made keeping her oblivious to things he didn't want her worrying about a lot harder.

"Nothing sweetheart." he said, forcing himself to smile to try and stop her worrying and it seemed to work as she studied his expression for a second before smiling back.

"Can we go to the park?" she asked satisfied that everything was ok.

"Not tonight." He just wanted to get home as fast as possible but Lucy stopped walking.

"Please." she asked, tugging on his arm and looking up at him with wide pleading eyes. He hated that expression, she hardly ever used it but when she did it was incredibly hard to refuse her and he always felt terrible when he had to.

"Sorry Luce, not tonight. I just want to get home." he told her as he looked over his shoulder again to see the man stood further up the street still watching them. He gripped Lucy's hand tighter and started to walk again, relieved when she didn't put up a fight. He knew she was disappointed about the park and figured he'd have to think of something to do to make up for it. He hated disappointing her.

"Can we go tomorrow night?" she asked as they walked and Edward looked down at her quickly as they continued to walk, wondering why she wanted to go to the park so badly.

"Maybe." he answered, hoping that would settle her. He really didn't like refusing her but he just wanted to get her home and safe - away from the man who definitely seemed to be following them. They continued walking home in silence which was unusual for them and when they reached the flat block Edward was glad to close the door behind them and not see the man standing there. They walked up the steps, the lift still broken and when they got to the flat Edward locked them in, putting the chain on. Lucy didn't notice though as she had already skipped off to her room.

They spent the evening sat on the sofa, Edward reading stories to Lucy. She was leant into his chest, sucking her thumb as she listened to the stories while he had one arm around her and the other hand holding the book. They hadn't sat reading like this for quite a while as Lucy normally got bored too easily but that night she just wanted to hear his voice, calm as it should be. She could tell something had made him jumpy on the way home, what with how quiet he had been and his refusal to take her to the park and it had had the knock on effect of making her feel uneasy. Hearing his voice calm and gentle as it was now was erasing that, making her feel happy and at peace.

Edward watched Lucy curiously as he read the stories. Normally he couldn't get her to sit still long enough for even one story. Tonight he was fast running out of things to read and she still wanted more. He had settled down now, no longer thinking about the man that had followed them. They were safe in their flat and he was too caught up in Lucy to really think of anything else. He loved spending time with her like this and it appeared tonight that she was enjoying it too. His voice was starting to get quieter now as it became hoarse from speaking for so long. He wasn't stopping though, not until he either ran out of books or Lucy got fed up. It was the books eventually that stopped him as just after he had placed the last book down and was going to ask Lucy what she wanted to do next he looked at her to discover she was fast asleep. He smiled and curled a strand of her hair around his fingers before he sighed. He had to put her to bed now, meaning he would be on his own. He wanted to keep her on his knee, just so he had that warmth that meant somebody else was with him. It wasn't good for Lucy though and he knew that so he carefully slid his arms around her and stood, picking her up. He carried her through to her room and changed her into her pyjamas before tucking her into bed without waking her. He lightly kissed her forehead and stroked her hair back away from her face before straightening up and looking down at her. She was smiling slightly in her sleep, looking very content and he smiled slightly, mirroring her smile. He quietly turned and left then, shutting the door behind him and going back through to the living room where he turned on the TV just to have some kind of background noise to make it seem less lonely.

* * *

><p>Edward got Lucy to school the next morning and was relieved to see the blonde man nowhere in sight. He left Lucy playing with Anna in the playground as he made his way to work without the uneasy feeling this time. He got to work on time and stood behind the counter going through some paper work for Garret for quite a while before he heard the door ting as someone came in. When he looked up to see who it was he felt himself freeze. It was the blonde man. He saw him look at him for a minute before turning to browse through the CDs. Edward watched him the entire time, feeling his unease return even though he didn't appear to be doing anything other than looking at CDs and after around ten minutes he approached the counter with a CD. Edward took it and scanned it then looked up at the man who handed him a ten pound note. After checking it to make sure it was real he pushed into the till the amount received and the draw pinged open. After sorting out the change he ripped the receipt from the till and placed it on top of the CD which he put into a bag and handed to the man along with his change. He then walked out of the shop and Edward sighed as he slumped over the counter, glad he had gone as he tried to relax again.<p>

It reached Edwards lunch break and he was wishing that he could get the rest of the afternoon off and go check that Lucy was ok. The presence of the man in the shop had really made him jumpy, something was screaming inside his head that he should be trying to get as far away from him as possible and it was frustrating him that he couldn't work out where he knew the man from. He didn't understand what it was about him that was scaring him so badly, he hadn't threatened him in anyway and for all he knew he could have known someone at Lucy's school and just happened to have been headed in the same direction as they were yesterday afternoon. He didn't even look out of the ordinary but he was just setting off some unknown instinct that was warning danger. Edward got through the rest of the day, jumping every time the bell over the door rang. It finally reached the end of his shift though so he left the shop to go and pick Lucy up, hoping the man wouldn't be there that evening when Lucy was.

* * *

><p>"Can we go to the park?" Lucy asked as soon as Edward had put her down from their hello hug at the school gates. He looked at her wide eyed pleading expression and sighed knowing he couldn't say no this time as he'd seen no sign of anyone suspicious on his way to pick her up and he couldn't disappoint her two days in a row.<p>

"Ok, but just for a little while."

"Thank you." She tugged on his arm so he leant down and she kissed his cheek making him smile. She then spotted Anna standing across from them with Bella and Edward watched her wave before he took hold of her hand. Anna waved back pulling Bella's attention to them and she smiled and waved as well but Edward had already turned away and started walking with Lucy skipping along beside him.

They got to the park and Lucy led him towards the duck pond first where she stopped for a couple of minutes to watch them all before heading in the direction of the play area where she went straight for the swings. They'd been there for ten minutes when Edward realised why Lucy had been so insistent about going to the park the last couple of days. He stopped the swing for her and she jumped off and ran straight to Anna who had just appeared along with Bella. He reluctantly followed knowing there would be no way he could get out of talking to Bella as the girls had already wandered off to the seesaw.

"Hi." Bella greeted him with a shy smile as he came to a stop beside her.

"Hey." He answered wishing he could think of an excuse to leave but Lucy looked happy playing with Anna and he didn't want to ruin it for her. He decided to just head over to the bench that sat to side of the play area so he could keep an eye on her and wasn't surprised when Bella sat down next to him, there wasn't much else to do. They sat in silence for a while which Edward was ok with but he could hear Bella fidgeting and guessed she felt uncomfortable.

"Edward?" she finally spoke up and he looked to her on reflex at hearing his name. "I wanted to apologise, I know I probably offended you the other day and I really didn't mean to."

"You didn't offend me." He told her quietly.

"Well I'm sorry anyway. I just thought it would be good if we could talk since Anna and Lucy seem to be pretty close." She commented and he knew he couldn't disagree. He was going to have to put his resolve to stay detached to the test, he couldn't avoid talking to her anymore.

"There's really no need to apologise. I know how it looks to people who don't know us, I'd make the same assumptions myself." He didn't want her to feel bad about something that wasn't really her fault. He was surprised she even cared about it, most people didn't seem to mind how he took what they said about him.

"Well I'm still sorry for how I reacted and I guess this looks a little strange, us turning up here at the same time as you but I promise I'm not stalking you, just in case you were wondering. Anna guilt tripped me into bringing her here for being late yesterday."

"Oh it's not you I'm worried about stalking me and I think the girls probably had this planned." He answered; he knew Lucy had been planning something the day before. It was only when he noticed Bella looking at him curiously that he realised what he'd said.

"One of the single mums after you?" she asked with a smile and he just shook his head.

"No." He answered shortly, he wondered briefly if she'd noticed the blonde man at the school gates but he didn't want to bring it up. He was sure his worries would sound stupid to anyone else. He didn't want to give her the impression he was crazy on top of everything else she no doubt thought about him.

"Well I wouldn't be surprised if the girls did plan this. Anna has been asking our mum if Lucy could come over for a while now but she wanted me to talk to you and get to know you a bit first. She's a little bit crazy protective sometimes. I guess Anna got bored of waiting."

"What does she want to know about me?" Edward asked uncomfortably, he didn't really like telling people about himself but he could see where she was coming from. He knew he wouldn't feel good about letting Lucy go to someone's house that he didn't know.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to interrogate you. I'm pretty certain you aren't a mad axe murderer or a drug dealer or something so I'm sure you're fine." It was easy to see how uncomfortable he was and she didn't want that. If the girls wanted to play together a lot she was hoping that they'd be able to be friends as well so she wanted to find some way to put him at ease. She didn't think asking him a load of personal questions straight away was a good idea. She got the impression that Renee had nothing to worry about from him, if Lucy was anything to go by he was of no danger to children.

"I'm definitely not a mad axe murderer or a drug dealer. I'm a shop assistant." He confirmed, unable to stop the slight smile her odd choice of occupations inspired. He couldn't tell if she was nervous for some reason or if she always came out with crazy ideas but he found he liked it. First with the stalking comment, which hadn't even occurred to him before she mentioned it and then with the jobs, it was very unguarded and he wondered if she was always like that.

"What about you?"

"I'm just a boring college student. Oh and my mum's a primary school teacher so if Lucy does come over at some point she'd be perfectly safe." She answered glad to see him relaxing a little. His shoulders weren't quite as hunched anymore and he was actually looking at her for once.

"That's good to know. How come you're stuck with the school run if she's a teacher?" The question was out before he had chance to think it through, he wasn't doing very well at appearing disinterested although he would have to know a little about them if Lucy was wanting to go to their house and the more she talked about her, the less he'd have to talk about himself.

"She teaches at a different school, across town. Anna didn't want to be in her class as she thought the other kids might tease her for it, and my college is closer so I take her in when I can."

He didn't know what to say after that, he wasn't good at talking to people and he didn't want to ask her anything else in case he got too interested so he just stayed silent. He tried to keep his eyes on Lucy but he found his gaze drifting to Bella. She was wearing black skinny jeans, converse and a purple hooded top, it was nothing special but she still looked good. They were eventually saved from the awkward silence they were sitting in when Lucy ran up to them and asked Edward to spin the roundabout for them. He happily agreed and followed her over to it, pleased to have an excuse to avoid talking to Bella further.

Bella watched as he played with the girls, he was really good with them and had even managed to get Anna laughing which was unusual as she was normally shy with new people and took a while to get used to them. He looked so happy as well, he genuinely seemed to enjoy playing with them, the tiredness had left his eyes and a bright smile took over his face. It was staggering the difference it made, the bruises could be easily over looked when he was smiling like that and it was breath taking. She really wished she could start a proper conversation with him. They'd done a little better today but even though he assured her she hadn't offended him yet, he still seemed uncomfortable talking to her and she didn't know what to say to him, all logical thoughts seemed to leave her as soon as she was looking at him and she didn't want to scare him off with too many questions.

They abandoned the roundabout and Edward chased the girls around, making them squeal and laugh as he caught one of them and tickled them before chasing after the other. That kept them occupied for a while but Edward eventually caught Lucy and swung her up over his shoulder. Bella watched as he said something to Anna before taking her hand and he walked back over to the bench with both girls, Lucy still giggling on his shoulder while Anna was looking up at him with a smile on her face. It seemed Bella wasn't the only one who had taken a liking to him.

"I think it's time we headed home." Edward announced when they reached the bench and he'd set Lucy back on the ground.

"Yeah we ought to be heading off too. Is it ok if I speak to our mum about having Lucy over for dinner?" Bella asked causing both girls to look up at Edward hopefully. Staring down at the pair of them Edward found himself nodding, there was no way he could disappoint them when they were looking at him like that.

"Sure, let me know what she says and we can try and arrange something I guess."

"Thanks, we should be going then. It was nice talking to you." Bella said awkwardly, she didn't really want to leave yet, she'd been enjoying watching them all having fun but Renee probably would be wondering where they'd got to and she'd get more chances to talk to him now he seemed to be open to the idea of the girls meeting up after school. It was probably best to leave while things were going well. "We'll see you at the school gates no doubt."

Edward just nodded and mumbled goodbye before he lead Lucy off in the opposite direction to Bella and Anna. He'd had fun playing with the girls, it was so much easier to get along with children than trying to talk to people his own age and Anna seemed like a nice kid, he was glad to see Lucy seemed to have good taste in friends. Bella had been surprisingly friendly as well but he was glad her sudden attempts at talking to him had been for the girls benefit, it would make things a lot easier for him.


	8. Chapter 7 Found

**Chapter 7- Found**

Edward was run off his feet at work. The evening shift the night before seemed to have been a busy one and he'd spent the morning having to restock the shelves. Then they'd had a delivery of posters come in which had to be sorted and put away all at the same time as serving the customers that kept coming though the door. He was glad for his break at lunch time and was sat in the back reading a magazine when Garret came in looking flustered.

"Edward, I know this is short notice but could you cover a shift tonight? You can bring Lucy as normal. " he asked and Edward looked up, a sinking feeling setting in his stomach. After the week he'd had so far he just wasn't in the mood for overtime. He was tired and although he'd been ok the last couple of days he was starting to feel some of the aches from the weekend return after all the running around in the park and being on his feet at work. He'd been looking forward to a quiet, early night with Lucy but he couldn't turn down overtime, any extra money was good money.

"Sure." he answered, plastering a fake smile across his face and Garret looked relieved.

"Thanks, I'll pay you double as it's such short notice and a Friday night." he said and Edwards's smile changed into a genuine one. It would definitely be worth it at double time as he could get Lucy the new dress she wanted. The afternoon continued on in much the same way as his morning had and he knew the evening would be the same. Garret let him leave half an hour early so he could run to the nearby grocery store and get some snack foods for Lucy to keep her happy until they got home and he dropped them off into the staff fridge in the back of the shop before he left to pick her up.

When he reached the school the bell was just ringing and he got to the gates in time to catch an excited Lucy.

"Anna's mum said I could go play at her house!" she told him before he'd even managed to say hello and he couldn't help but smile at her excitement.

"I guess I'll have to talk to Bella to arrange that then at some point won't I?" he asked and she nodded while hugging him.

"It'll have to wait until next week though as I have to work another shift tonight so we need to get back to the shop."

"Will Garret be there?"

"Yup and I'm sure he'll want to play with you for a little while and you can look at all the new CD covers." He told her as he put her down and she grabbed his hand. Lucy chatted to him all the way to the shop, telling him everything Anna had said they could do at her house. He hoped Bella and her mum were ready for two hyperactive five year olds running around as it sounded like they'd made a lot of plans already.

When they got the shop Edward took Lucy through the back to let her say hello to Garret and Ben who were also working that night. They hadn't seen her for a while and she couldn't really remember Ben that well so she went shy, half hiding behind Edward as they said hello to her. Ben left them too it to check on the front of the shop and Lucy ran over to give Garret a hug while Edward went to the fridge to get her the carton of juice and yoghurt he'd bought her earlier. Once he settled her with that Garret sat down to chat with her and Edward went out front to help Ben.

They'd been there for a couple of hours and Lucy had joined them out front as Garret had some paper work he needed to do. She was wandering around looking at all the CDs and had noticed one that had a duck on the front of it. She wanted to look at it closer but it was too high up so she was looking around for Edward to help her but he was busy serving someone and she couldn't see Ben anywhere so she sighed and looked back up to it wishing she was taller.

"You want that down?" she suddenly heard a voice ask and looked up to see a large man pointing to the CD case she'd been looking at. He was huge, taller than her dad was and three times as broad, he'd got dark hair that was cut short and bright blue eyes. He was wearing black suit trousers and a light blue shirt which was unbuttoned at the collar but the brightly coloured hooded top that seemed to be covered in a comic strip lightened his whole appearance so instead of looking harsh and intimidating he looked cheerful and friendly. She looked up at him warily, remembering how Edward always told her not to have anything to do with strangers but she wanted to see the CD and couldn't see how anything bad could happen from that so nodded. The guy did look friendly and reminded her slightly of Edward for some reason so as he passed her the CD she smiled slightly.

"Where are your parents?" the man asked, thinking it was strange for such a young girl to be on her own. She didn't appear to be lost and looking for anyone though so he assumed her parents had to be around somewhere.

"Lucy? What are you doing?" Edward interrupted them and Lucy looked up to see him stood next to her. "I've told you not to have anything to do with strangers, you ask me." He scolded as he looked at her closely, checking she was ok.

"Sorry." she mumbled and he softened, happy that she seemed to be fine and no harm had been done.

"It's ok." he smiled, letting her know he wasn't mad at her as he stroked her hair back from her face making her smile too.

"Edward?" the guy questioned and they both looked to him, Edward taking a proper look at him for the first time. As he realised just who it was he glared at him, his hand tightening on Lucy's shoulder where it had come to rest as Lucy looked between them both confused by Edwards reaction to the stranger.

"What are you doing here Emmet?" he asked, not letting up on his glare as he felt the anger inside of him growing. He wasn't allowed to walk into their lives anymore so why could they just walk into his like this? Lucy was looking up at Edward for some kind of explanation, not having a clue what was going on and who this guy her dad apparently knew and disliked was. She didn't know him and didn't know how Edward did as she knew most of the people he did even if only to recognise a face.

"Looking at CDs, but I'm in this area looking for you." He answered as he looked at Edward, noticing the fading bruises and healing cuts that still showed on his face. He looked down to the little girl whose shoulder Edward's hand was still resting on. He could see she was looking to Edward for an explanation of what was going on but Edward wasn't noticing, too busy glaring at him. He guessed that little girl, Lucy, was his niece, although how he'd missed that before he wasn't sure, studying her now he could see her eyes and hair were the exact same shade as Edward's and even her expressions matched his. He'd been looking for Edward for a while now, wanting to know how he was doing but he was surprised he had actually found him, no one they knew had heard anything from him for years, he'd managed to completely vanish. After not finding any leads from their friends Emmet had resorted to spending his spare time wandering around random places with an old photo of Edward hoping to spot him or find someone who had. He hadn't had any luck until now and it was purely a coincidence, he had just been looking for some new music after someone at his work had recommended this store.

"Well you've found me, you can go now." Edward replied shortly, pulling Emmet from his thoughts with a reaction he hadn't expected.

"What?" he asked, not understanding, he had always thought Edward would have been pleased to see him when he finally managed to track him down and was totally thrown by his apparent anger.

"I'm not allowed to walk into your lives when I feel like it so why can you do that to me? Just go." He answered, he'd had a lot of anger and bitterness stored up inside him for years after what had happened with his family and unfortunately for Emmet he was providing the target to vent it.

"I never agreed with our parents Edward. I kept arguing with them about it, trying to get them to change their minds. I wanted to find you to make sure you were ok. Alice really misses you too. She'd love to see you again." Emmet told him, trying to placate him even though he knew Edward had a very good reason for his anger. Edward ignored him, looking down at Lucy instead who was starting to look a little scared.

"Go into the back and draw some pictures or something. You have your paper and pens don't you?" he asked her and she nodded. He didn't want Lucy around if he was going to be arguing with Emmet, and he didn't want to be answering the questions he knew she'd have if she stayed with them.

"Ok then, go through the back and I'll explain at home." he said so Lucy smiled slightly, still wary of what was going on but she didn't want to upset Edward even more than he appeared to be, she hadn't seen him react like this to anyone before. Once Edward had returned her smile, even if it hadn't quite reached his eyes, she wandered through the shop and into the back where she sat down on the floor and pulled out the paper and pens from her bag. Edward watched her leave before rounding back on Emmet.

"Look, I don't know what you expect now you've found me but I am not going back home. Not now, I can't mess Lucy up like that. Mum and Dad won't want me there and it'll only get Lucy excited and then disappointed." he said bluntly but Emmet shook his head.

"It's been nearly five years Edward, a lot changes in that time. They haven't said anything but I think they'd be pleased to see you. Alice really wants to see you again and doesn't Lucy deserve the chance to meet her family?" Emmet argued, he hadn't spent months searching for him just to let Edward push him away. He knew he and the rest of their family had a lot to make up for and that Edward was unlikely to trust them again but he had to try and he wasn't going to leave until they'd at least talked and he knew Edward and Lucy were ok.

"They didn't want her then, they won't want her now. I'm not taking her somewhere she's not wanted." Edward replied stubbornly "I have to get back to work."

"When do you finish?" Emmet asked, following Edward as he headed towards the counter.

"In an hour." Edward answered as he looked up at the clock, hoping that Emmet would just leave so he could finish his shift in peace then get Lucy home and pray his nightmares wouldn't reappear that night as he knew it was likely Emmet's appearance would dredge them up.

"I'll wait then, and we can talk after you finish work." Emmet said, ruining Edward's hopes of finishing his shift in peace.

"Fine." he muttered with a scowl while he pretended to be busy sorting out the CD drawer below the counter. For the rest of Edward's shift Emmet stood at the side trying to get Edward to talk to him when no one else was in the shop but he was being stubborn and didn't want to know. The hour passed slowly but it finally did and Edward went through to the back to get his jacket and Lucy. When he came back out he looked at Emmet still looking annoyed and grumpy.

"Well we're going home so you can go back to where ever you're staying." he said as he took hold of Lucy's hand and started to head out of the shop, not even waiting for Emmet to say anything.

"Edward I'm coming with you whether you want me to or not." Emmet insisted as he followed them and Edward span around to glare at him again.

"There's no point. Just go back to Mum and Dad and leave us alone." he hissed before stepping out of the shop and onto the street. Lucy was looking from Edward to Emmet confused. Edward was getting so angry and Lucy had never seen him angry, it scared her, she tried tugging on his hand to get his attention but it didn't seem to make any difference as he continued walking.

"I just want to talk and find out how you've been so I can tell Alice and stop her worrying about you. For all we knew you could have been dead by now." Emmet shouted after them bringing Edward to a stop. He took in a deep breath before looking down to Lucy who looked like she was on the verge of tears and gave in. He didn't want to upset Lucy and he knew Emmet wouldn't give in, they were both as stubborn as each other, it was a family trait.

"Fine." he muttered and started walking again expecting Emmet to follow if he wanted to go with them but he'd stopped by a car.

"Edward wait!" he yelled and as Edward turned around he pointed to the car. "You might as well get in. I'm going to need directions to where ever you live." Edward sighed and walked back to him. He opened one of the back doors and helped Lucy in watching as she put the seatbelt on to make sure she did it right before he walked around to the passenger door and got in himself.

"It's not far, we normally walk." he muttered as Emmet started the car up.

"Do you have a car?" Emmet asked curiously, wanting to start a normal conversation since Edward had agreed to get into the car. They had to start somewhere if they were going to talk.

"Nope, never learnt to drive." he answered and Emmet missed the unhappy look on Edwards face as he concentrated on the road so pushed on with the questions.

"Why?"

"When you're struggling to pay bills and buy food and have a kid to look after you don't tend to blow money on things like driving lessons." Edward muttered and Emmet nodded slightly, wishing he hadn't asked because it was quite obvious really and hadn't improved Edward's mood with him. The car was silent except for the occasional mutterings from Edward telling Emmet where to go. They finally pulled up in the parking for the block of flats and Edward got out, went round to Lucy's door and opened it for her so she could jump out. He then took hold of her hand again as they walked into the building, Emmet following after locking his car. Emmet looked around as they went up the flights of stairs, noticing that the place seemed quite run down. When they finally turned away from the stairs and walked along a corridor with doors either side he could hear the arguing that was normal for Edward and stared at all the rubbish, graffiti and just the general state of the flats. This, to Emmet, did not look like the kind of place you would want to live. He noticed they had stopped outside a slightly cleaner looking door which Edward was now unlocking. When it was open Lucy ran in and to her room as she always did and Emmet didn't say anything as he watched them fall into their normal routine. Emmet followed Edward and looked around the room they were now in, seeing it was the kitchen. Everything in it looked like it had seen better days a long time ago. Edward left the kitchen but Emmet stayed put as Lucy came in and sat down in a chair at the table before Edward returned minus his jacket and got Lucy a drink and biscuit as usual which she ate as he started to cook them tea. The whole time it was like Emmet wasn't there, Edward appeared to be ignoring him so didn't talk to him and Emmet couldn't think what to say as he just watched them.

"Do you want any?" Edward finally spoke for the first time as he started to serve out the spaghetti bolognaise he had made.

"Err...yes please." Emmet answered and sat down in a chair on the opposite side from Lucy. Lucy had been watching the both of them the whole time Edward had been cooking. She was wondering who Emmet was and why Edward was being so cold towards him. She could tell that Edward wasn't happy and wanted to know why. She didn't like it when he was like this although he did seemed to have calmed down a bit since they'd got into the car. Edward finished serving out their dinner and sat one plate down in front of Lucy, one in front of Emmet then one at the end of the table in between the two of them. He then went to a drawer and got out cutlery which he handed to everyone before finally sitting down. All the time they were eating Edward kept looking to Lucy to make sure she was ok and not getting into too bigger a mess with it. She was managing ok this time though and had managed not to spill sauce all over her clothes. Emmet was watching Edward, wishing he could think of something to say to break the really awkward silence.

"How long have you lived here?" he finally asked, unable to take sitting in silence any longer and Edward looked at him. Just the glare in his eyes told Emmet it was going to be a very long time before Edward even thought about forgiving him for the things that happened in the past.

"Since I was thrown out." he answered and Emmet looked down into his plate then. It was fairly obvious from the state of the building and the appearance of the inside of the flat that Edward had had a hard time. It was hardly surprising though when he thought about it. He'd been thrown out with a baby without a clue how to look after himself really never mind the baby. He couldn't help but feel Edward was right to be angry with him. He should have done something sooner to help. Lucy was looking at them again, still wanting Edward to explain and this time he noticed.

"Lucy this is your Uncle, my older brother Emmet." Edward said dully and he saw the spark of recognition in her eyes as she flicked her gaze to Emmet before looking back to him.

"The photo people?" she asked and Edward nodded. He was a lot bigger than the boy in that photo had been, but now it had been pointed out Lucy could see the eyes were the same and it explained why he'd reminded her slightly of Edward when he'd first appeared in the shop. They were far from identical but they had enough similarities in their faces to show they were brothers.

"Photo?" Emmet asked and Edward looked to him, not looking quite so hostile anymore but still far from happy.

"She caught me looking at some photos so I had to explain to her who everyone in them was." he replied and Emmet nodded, slightly surprised to hear he even had pictures of them, he hadn't been given much time to pack before he'd been thrown out.

"Lucy, me and Emmet need to talk so can you go and play in your room for a while?" Edward asked, knowing he'd have to talk to Emmet and not wanting Lucy around if it got out of hand, he didn't know how long he'd be able to hold his temper in and Lucy did not need to see him yelling at his brother, there were also aspects of his past he did not want Lucy to hear and he didn't know what Emmet would stir up, he tended to speak first and think later. Lucy just nodded before she jumped down from her seat, briefly hugged Edward and left the kitchen. Once she was gone Edward stood up and collected all the plates then put them into the sink and Emmet decided he was going to have to ask questions as it didn't look like Edward was just going to talk.


	9. Chapter 8 Questions

**Chapter 8 – Questions**

"What happened to your face?" Emmet asked, being really curious and slightly worried as to what had given Edward his now fading bruises. He couldn't alter what had happened in the past but he could help make the present better and was determined to do so.

"Don't know." Edward replied as the tap went on and started to fill the sink with bubbly water. He didn't really want to talk about it, he didn't know what had happened and talking about it wasn't going to help him figure it. Both he and Lucy were fine now so he didn't really want to think about it.

"How don't you know?" Emmet asked confused, he could tell by the marks on Edward's face that the beating had been bad and he failed to see how he could have no idea of who had done it or why.

"I can't remember it. I went out for food shopping and the next thing I remember is waking up in an alley like this." Edward muttered as he started to wash up the plates from dinner.

"You really can't remember anything?"

"Not a thing."

"That's not good. Did you go to the hospital or police?"

"I was fine when I got home and what would I have told the police?"

"I don't know but you should have got checked out."

Edward didn't respond to that. All he'd wanted to do was get back to Lucy and once he'd got home he'd been ok. It had never even occurred to him to go to the hospital. Emmet stood up as their conversation died again, deciding to help Edward wash up and picked up the tea towel he saw sitting on the units to dry the plates.

"So...what did you do after Mum and Dad threw you out?" Emmet asked, taking another stab at starting a conversation. He was never very good at being sensitive and tended to just say whatever came into his head and that had been the question he and Alice had been wanting to know the answer to for years.

"I slid down the door and sat there crying while Lucy joined in." Edward answered and Emmet sighed, it really didn't look like Edward was going to make getting him to talk easy and Emmet just seemed to be hitting bad topic after bad topic. This really wasn't how he'd expected things to go when he finally found his younger brother. He had to find some way to make Edward see how sorry he was and how much he wanted to be there for him now.

"I know that, I stood and watched you from my bedroom window. You were sat there for well over an hour. I really wanted to help you but couldn't because of our parents. You know what Dad is like. What did you do after then? I watched you walk away down the street." Emmet replied, not dropping the conversation, determined to get a proper response this time.

"Wandered around the town all night wondering what on earth you do with a baby. Ended up sat in a bus stop to get out off the rain, trying to stop Lucy from crying, eventually she fell asleep and I did too. When I woke up in the morning I walked around a bit more, Lucy asleep in my arms and finally found this block of flats. The guy who owns them said I could rent one out and pay him when I got money, he felt sorry for me seeing me stood there with a baby. He's a sucker for kids, really likes Lucy too which is useful when money's tight. He helped me get sorted with benefits and college and I got a job working in the college crèche. When Lucy was old enough for nursery I got a job in the music shop, letting me work the mornings while Lucy was at nursery. They let me do some afternoons when money was really bad and Lucy just played in the back. As Lucy got older and was at nursery and school for longer they just let me do more hours." he replied deciding he may as well give Emmet the glossed over version of his life for the past five years just to try and avoid his questions.

"So you've been ok then?" Emmet asked hopefully and Edward stopped, holding the pan he was washing in mid air and looked at him wondering just how stupid he could be.

"As ok as a sixteen year old can be with a baby they know nothing about. It got better as I got older and she did but the first year was horrible. All I wanted to do was go back home to you lot, for Mum to hug me and tell me it was all ok and that I could stay. You have no idea how hard life can be. You still have everyone around you, the only person I have is Lucy. She wants to help me and make things easier, I know she does. She can tell when I'm not happy or when something is wrong but what can a five year old do?" he said, his anger coming through again. Emmet didn't know what to say then. He had come to try and help Edward if he could. He thought it was long enough now for their parents to have accepted it and he wanted Edward to go and see them with Lucy. The way Edward was though was going to make it extremely hard for him to persuade him to go. He had obviously become very resilient but Emmet guessed he had had to be that way.

"Daddy?" They both heard Lucy's shaky voice coming from the kitchen doorway and Edward could instantly tell she was on the verge of crying. He turned around and quickly crossed the kitchen to her where he crouched down in front of her so she moved closer to him for a cuddle.

"What's wrong baby?" he asked gently as he looked at her. She looked up at him with sad eyes and he stroked the hair away from her face.

"I don't feel well." she told him quietly causing him to place the back of his hand against her forehead.

"What kind of not well?" he asked, telling she really was ill from the fact she was hotter than she should be.

"Sore tummy." she answered and he hugged her tightly again, feeling tears soaking into his t-shirt.

"Awwww, my poor baby." he whispered to her then straightened up, picking her up at the same time. He took her through into the living room and sat down in a chair with her on his lap. She shuffled round so she was cuddled into him and he wrapped one arm around her while he stroked her hair. He lightly kissed her forehead and she looked at him with her sad eyes.

"Do you want a drink or anything?" he asked her to which she nodded and Edward turned his head to look at the door and saw Emmet stood there watching them and decided to make use of his unwanted presence.

"Can you get her some lemonade for me? It should be in the cupboard next to the washing machine." he asked and Emmet nodded then left the room. He reappeared a few minutes later with the glass of lemonade which he gave to Edward before he sat down on the sofa. Edward gave Lucy the glass and she took a small sip from it. She took a few more small sips before she gave it back to him and he leant over the side of his seat and sat it down on the floor before he let Lucy settle down again. He watched her close her eyes and gently kissed her forehead again. A few minutes later she had fallen asleep with Edward watching her and Emmet watching the both of them. He was slightly shocked at how good Edward was with her. He had never imagined him to be like that with anyone. At sixteen no one could have even guessed he would turn out like this, he had been too irresponsible. Now though he appeared to be a loving dad completely devoted to his little daughter. It was such a change in the character Emmet had known that it was hard to believe.

"I can't believe you're like this." he muttered, unable to keep his thoughts to himself and causing Edward to look up from Lucy but he didn't say anything. "You should come back to our parents' house with me. Show them what you're like now, how much you've changed. Show them how wrong they were to throw you out. Alice really wants to see you too and I know she would love to meet Lucy." Emmet continued, he didn't see how their parents could fail to see how much Edward had changed.

"I can't. They told me I could never come back. They are not going to like me just turning up." Edward replied coldly but Emmet shook his head.

"I think they would. I reckon Mum regrets throwing you out. I know she wonders what happened to you. Alice has often heard her talking to Dad about you. I think they'd be pleased to see you and even if they're not, I'm inviting you there so you'd be my guest. They can't argue with that." Emmet could see how torn Edward was, the lure of home was obviously strong even if he wasn't sure of the reception he would receive.

"I don't know. What if I agree to come then when we get there they hate Lucy? I don't care what they say to me but Lucy is a different matter. I don't want her thinking she isn't wanted or that she's bad." he said, looking back to his sleeping daughter in his arms. He wouldn't let anyone hurt her, least of all his parents. No matter how much he longed to go home he wouldn't put her at risk and he was fairly sure he wouldn't withstand being rejected by them again. At least as things were he always had the slight hope that if they saw him again they would accept him, he didn't want that taken away.

"They wouldn't do that." Emmet told him but Edward just laughed slightly.

"How can you tell? They threw me out on my own with a baby and nowhere at all for me to go, no money for me to go anywhere with all when I was sixteen! How did they even expect me to survive that? If I hadn't been lucky with finding this flat Lucy probably would have died and I'd be on the streets. They would have done that." Edward responded, finding his anger again and using it to force down his hope and urge to give in to Emmet. Deep down he knew seeing his parents would only hurt him.

"They made a mistake Edward. I think they know that now, give them the chance. Let Lucy meet her family." Emmet tried to persuade him knowing that Lucy would be the key to getting Edward to give in. His words sunk in and struck a chord with Edward, Lucy had said she wanted to meet them and if she had the chance to it wasn't fair for him not to let her. Surely they wouldn't do something to hurt a five year old who was innocent of the whole mess that had split their family up. As Emmet stayed silent and he focussed on Lucy he felt his anger drain away, he'd wanted this chance for too long for himself as well. He'd love to go home and see his family again, to make everything right so he knew he had someone. He wanted to be able to say he had the support of his family and he wanted them to be proud of him for what he had done. He wanted their approval. He couldn't believe what Emmet was saying though, not easily, he needed more reassurance.

"If I did come with you how would me and Lucy get home again?" he asked.

"I'd bring you back here in the car. We've moved house since you were last there, we live quite a way away from you now." Emmet answered and Edward lapsed into silence again as he thought. He wanted to believe everything Emmet was saying and say yes to him but he couldn't shake the idea of him turning up and nothing being different. His parents still hating him and just telling him to leave again. He could picture how upset Lucy would be if after being told she was going to meet her grandparents they just told them to go and never come back. He already knew how much it would hurt him. There was the slim chance though that that wouldn't happen, Emmet was insistent that at least Alice wanted to see them and he couldn't deny that wanted to see his family again.

"When do you want us to go?" he finally asked and Emmet smiled slightly, seeing Edward was giving in to the idea.

"Well I was thinking I could stay here for tonight then you come with me when I go home tomorrow." he replied and Edward went into thought again while looking at Lucy. She did deserve the chance to meet her family and he couldn't really see how anyone could take against her now. She was just such a nice little girl, everyone else liked her. He'd just have to pray that his parents wouldn't hold the past against her.

"Ok, if Lucy is feeling ok tomorrow morning we'll come." he gave in and Emmet's smile grew.

"Great!" he said and Edward smiled slightly. He really hoped he wasn't making a mistake.

Edward and Emmet stayed up talking for quite a while. Edward wanted to know what had been happening at home just like Emmet wanted to know what had been happening with him. Lucy woke up a few times and each time she did Emmet watched how Edward was with her. It was such a strange sight for him. He followed Edward when he took Lucy to bed and looked around her room, easily seeing how much better everything in it was compared to the rest of the flat. He could see Edward had definitely done his best for her. When they went through to Edward's room to get Emmet a pillow and quilt for the sofa Emmet could see the contrast between the two rooms, Edward's room was very sparse, and everything that was there had seen better days a long time ago. It was blatantly obvious that Lucy always came first to him now.

After Edward had gone to bed Emmet was left laid awake on the sofa, looking at the room he was in. Edward had been living here for five years and it was a very run down place. He had been in the bathroom and had seen the mould and the peeling wall paper. He could see damp in the corner of the living room too. The flat building wasn't nice either. This wasn't a place you wanted to spend your whole life yet it looked as though Edward would be doing so. He didn't seem to even mind it but then Emmet supposed after five years this was just normal for him and he couldn't see any other way of living so this was ok. For Emmet though he didn't like thinking that this would be where his brother lived with his daughter and it wasn't just where they were living that bothered Emmet, the state Edward was in hadn't gone unnoticed. Apart from the bruises he had dark circles under his eyes suggesting he wasn't getting enough sleep and he looked underweight. He'd never been as big as Emmet when they were kids, being a leaner build naturally but now his cheek bones stood out just a little too much and the jeans and t-shirt he was wearing looked slightly looser than they should have been. From everything Edward had told him he knew he worked hard and could guess that even so he was going without things so Lucy had everything she needed. It wasn't right that he was suffering as he struggled to provide for his daughter. They both deserved so much more.

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><p>The next morning when Edward woke Lucy up she said she was feeling ok so he told her where they were going and she got excited straight away even though he told her not to be. They were now sat in Emmet's car as he took them all to their parent's house but Edward was starting to have second thoughts, beginning to think this wasn't such a good idea. It was an hour before the car came to a stop outside a large house in an expensive looking area. Edward just sat looking up at it with nerves filling him and the feeling of wanting to be back in his little flat overcoming him. He couldn't do this.<p>

"Emmet this isn't a good idea. We should never have come here." he said hoping they could turn around and go home but Emmet shook his head.

"You're here now so you're coming in." he said but Edward still wouldn't move so Emmet got out of the car and let Lucy get out before taking hold of her hand. He walked around the car and towards the house knowing that if Lucy went Edward would follow and Lucy was really excited now. Edward watched them as Emmet let them into the house then stood in the doorway looking to him. He slowly got out of the car, feeling himself shaking as he walked towards them. When he was finally in the house Emmet closed the door behind him and Edward looked around the large clean hall way. The house looked like an expensive show home making Edward feel even less like he should be there. There was no sign that a family lived here which struck him as a bad sign. In their old house there had been family pictures everywhere but it looked as though those days were over for this family. A lot seemed to have changed in the time he had been estranged from them. Emmet had walked away from him and into what he guessed was the kitchen, taking Lucy with him but Edward couldn't move, he was too scared of the reception he'd receive. He didn't want to be there anymore. He could hear Emmet talking in the kitchen and then his parents' voices and looked to the front door wishing he could run but he couldn't, Emmet had Lucy.


	10. Chapter 9 All At Once Part 1

_Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer_

_AN – This turned out to be a pretty long chapter, I was going to edit it down but it ended up even longer so I've split it into two posts. _

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><p><strong>Chapter 9 – All At Once (Part 1)<br>**

Emmet was in the kitchen with his parents looking confusedly at the little girl clinging tightly to his hand. Her excitement had dwindled quickly with the looks on their faces, she didn't think they looked very happy. They both looked older than they had in the photo she had seen but she could easily recognise them. Neither of them were smiling, the woman was still looking at her and Lucy thought she looked worried while the man was now staring at Emmet with a frown.

"Emmet who's this?" Elizabeth asked and Emmet grinned thinking they were just surprised. He couldn't see how anyone could fail to love Lucy.

"Lucy, my niece, you're granddaughter." he told them and while Elizabeth's gaze shot to her husband, Edward Senior, his expression morphed to narrowly contained anger as he glared at Emmet.

"How can she be?" he asked, he'd had no idea that Emmet had been looking for Edward. It hadn't even occurred to him before that he would try, his word was law in their household and he hadn't thought Emmet would be foolish enough to go against him. He never had before.

"Well...her dad is stood in the hall too scared to come in but I do believe he is my brother and your son." Emmet responded, his optimism falling fast. He could tell by the look on his father's face that the only reason he wasn't shouting yet was because a young child was in the room. His mother paled at his words as she looked between the scared little girl in front of her and her furious husband.

"You mean...Edward's here?" she asked wishing the answer would be no but Emmet nodded. Nothing good was going to come from this. She'd always hoped that Ed would come to his senses one day but it didn't look like today would be it. She loved her son, but Ed was her husband and she loved him too. She wished Emmet had spoken to her first before bringing Edward to them, she knew what had happened in the past would have hurt him and she couldn't change that but would have liked to have avoided hurting him again. None of it was fair to him but there was nothing she could do.

"What's he doing here?" Ed asked, his voice cold and Lucy took an instant dislike to him as she shrank back into Emmet, hiding behind him. He didn't seem to even notice the effect he was having on her as he continued to glare at Emmet.

"I went looking for him, I wanted to know how he was doing. It took me ages to persuade him to come. He thought you wouldn't want him here." he said hoping that would take away some of his anger as it wasn't Edward's fault that Emmet had brought them here but it didn't seem to make any difference. Edward had been right, he shouldn't have brought them here. He was an idiot.

"He's changed so much, give him a chance." he muttered, as a last effort get through to them before he turned to leave the kitchen and his parents followed. Lucy was just confused, she hadn't got a clue what was going on now, these people weren't what she had expected when she'd been told she'd be meeting her grandparents and she wanted her dad. As soon as they were out of the kitchen she struggled free of Emmet's hand and ran to Edward. He looked back from the door as he heard them all leaving the kitchen and paled, now beginning to feel sick as he saw his parents. Noticing Lucy heading for him he crouched down when she reached him and hugged her. He buried his face into her hair, letting her calm him down, pretending they were back in their own flat. Everyone else was watching them but his parents were not looking happy. Edward let go of Lucy and straightened up again but he still didn't look up. Instead he kept his gaze on Lucy who was still looking up at him. He could see she was now nervous too so picked her up, letting her hide her face in his chest. He finally looked up and to his family and he could see Emmet was looking uneasy standing beside his mum who was worriedly looking at his angry father.

"I told you this wasn't a good idea." He muttered to Emmet. "I'm sorry I let him talk me into this, we'll just go." he added and turned around to head for the door. He just wanted to get out of this unfamiliar house and back into his own flat.

"Edward no, stay here. You can't get back anyway, you live too far away to walk and a taxi would cost a fortune." Emmet said moving closer towards him, he still hoped something could be salvaged from this. If their parents could just see him with Lucy and talk to him they'd have to change their minds about him, it just needed some time. Edward turned back around to face him and Emmet could see how unhappy he was.

"I told you they wouldn't want me here but I let you persuade me otherwise. I shouldn't have listened to you. We're going, even if we have to get a taxi. Lucy has met her grandparents now." he said. He had to get out of there, he couldn't stand the look on his father's face.

"Wait, I'll drive you back." Emmet sighed, if he was that determined to go he didn't want his failed idea to have cost him money, his flat had shown they needed every penny they could get but Edward shook his head.

"If they want nothing to do with me then I have no family. We've managed five years without one so we might as well go back to that. We'll get home by ourselves." he said and turned once more to the door. Emmet turned to glare at their parents and something seemed to stir in their mum.

"Edward stay for a bit, maybe we can talk or something." she said quietly and Edward turned to look at them, she still looked worried and his father was looking at her in shock but she had asked him to stay. He could feel his t-shirt getting damp though and realised Lucy was crying. She didn't like it, she could tell how upset Edward was and it was making her upset.

"Lucy, it's ok. Please don't cry." he said softly and gently kissed the top of her head just as the last member of his family came down the stairs. Edward looked up from Lucy to see her and she looked shocked before she rushed down the last few steps and stopped in front of him. She looked like she wanted to hug him but he had Lucy in his arms so she held herself back.

"Lucy, this your Aunty Alice." he said quietly and Lucy briefly looked away from his chest to the girl stood in front of them before she buried her head back into his chest.

"Edward she's beautiful." Alice said and he smiled slightly before he looked back to Lucy. He crouched down again and pulled her away from him. She looked up at him with tear filled eyes and he wiped away her tears with his thumb.

"It's ok baby, no need to cry." he told her as she tried to get him to hug her again.

"Hi Lucy." Alice said, also crouching down and Lucy turned to look at her but shuffled backwards towards Edward. She could easily recognise her from the photo, she still looked just as small and her smile was the same but her short hair was now styled so it stuck out in all directions. Normally Lucy would have loved her but right now all she wanted was to be alone with Edward, away from these scary new people who upset her daddy.

"Luce it's ok." Edward told her as she looked back to him obviously not believing him and he couldn't blame her. He sighed and gave up trying to make Lucy think everything was fine. Instead he picked her up again and hugged her tightly.

"She doesn't like it, she can tell I'm upset and it's upsetting her." Edward muttered the explanation to everyone else. "We'd be better off at home." he added sending a glare in Emmet's direction.

"No, you've got to stay." Alice said quickly, her eyes wide with panic at the fact he was trying to leave so quickly. She had missed him so much over the years.

"They don't want me here. They told me never to come back when they threw me out. I shouldn't have let Emmet make me come in the first place." he said and Alice turned to their parents.

"Please let him stay, we haven't seen him for years." she pleaded, puppy dog eyes and pouty bottom lip in place. Everyone found it hard to resist that look from her.

"I already said he could." Elizabeth answered looking awkwardly from her children to her husband who had gone back to frowning as he watched Edward and Lucy.

"Please stay Edward." Alice pleaded as she looked back to him and Lucy and as Edward looked at his baby sister he caved, it was almost as hard to say no to her as it was to Lucy.

"Ok, but I need to calm Lucy down. Do you have any milk?" he asked and Alice grinned while Emmet smiled too.

"I'll get her some." he said and went back into the kitchen while Edward followed Alice as she took them into the living room. He sat down on their large new looking sofa and tried to get Lucy to calm down by talking to her. Emmet soon came in with the milk and after she had drank that she did seem to calm slightly.

"Better?" Edward asked as she handed him the glass and she nodded.

"Where's your smile then?" he asked and she shrugged.

"I think we need to get that back. Do you know how we do it?" he asked her, while sitting the glass on the floor and grinning. Lucy shook her head.

"Good job I do then!" he said and started to tickle her, she squealed before she burst out laughing.

"Daddy stop it!" she squealed, trying to wriggle out of his grasp but Edward did as she asked and looked at her grinning as she smiled back to him.

"It worked." he commented happily and she nodded as she settled down on his lap and started to play with his fingers which he didn't mind. He watched her for a minute before he became aware that everyone was now sat in the room and all eyes were on him. He looked up to see Alice sitting on the other end of his sofa, Emmet sat in a chair and his parents sat on the sofa opposite him. Alice and Emmet were both smiling but his mum wasn't and his father still looked angry. Feeling uncomfortable with them all staring at him, he looked back down to Lucy again who was watching his hands as she pressed the tip of each of his fingers one after the other.

"So...how have you been?" Elizabeth asked finally breaking the awkward silence that had settled around them and startling Edward into looking back up. She wasn't sure she really wanted to hear the answer to it, but as she'd helped force him into his current life she felt she deserved the guilt that would go along with his answer and they couldn't just sit there in silence continuously, it would just give Ed more chance to explode and she couldn't let that happen with Lucy in the room.

"Ok." Edward answered shortly, it was obvious how uneasy she was as her gaze kept flicking over to his father. If it hadn't have been for Alice and her pout Edward was certain he would have ignored his wife and chucked him out again. He had never in his entire life felt this uncomfortable. It was made even worse by the fact that this was his family, this should have been his home but it was clear he didn't belong here with these people anymore.

"Where are you living?" Ed asked quietly after a pointed look from Alice. It was obvious he didn't really care and it made Edward reluctant to respond. If they didn't want to talk to him, he didn't want to talk to them.

"A block of flats an hour away." he muttered hoping this would all be over soon but Emmet decided to join in then.

"A run down block of flats." he commented and Edward shot him a glare before he looked back down to Lucy. He didn't want them to know anything about how he was living or managing as he knew this would be the last time he saw his family. It would probably just give his father more reasons to hate him as he'd just appear like even more of an embarrassment to their high class family. He'd sit this out for Alice's sake, they'd been close growing up and it had hurt to be split up from both her and Emmet, he guessed he owed it to her to answer their questions but he'd have to leave again and he couldn't cope with seeing them occasionally behind their parents' backs so it would have to be the last time. A clean break so they could all get on with their lives as best they could. At least they'd get a chance for a proper goodbye this time.

"Is Lucy at school now?" Elizabeth asked as everyone could feel the uncomfortable atmosphere and it was easy to see how awkward Edward was feeling. She hated this but there was nothing she could do.

"Yeah." he answered without looking up. If he just focused on Lucy it wouldn't be so bad, he could try and pretend these were just curious strangers he was talking to, not his parents.

"Does she like it?" Alice asked curiously, she'd always found it hard to sit quietly and she wanted to get rid of this awkwardness that was hanging over them all. It was stupid, this was her brother who she hadn't seen since she was fourteen and her niece who she'd never even met properly. She wanted to know how they'd been and what Lucy was like and she was determined not to let their parents spoil it.

"Yeah, she loves it apart from having to read." Edward answered, feeling slightly less uncomfortable with a question not from his parents.

"Daddy?" Lucy's quite voice broke into the conversation and everyone looked to her making her squirm slightly but she focussed on Edward and smiled to him.

"Yeah?" he asked, stroking her hair away from her face.

"I want my doll." she answered and Edward looked at her confused for a minute, he didn't remember her having it with her in the car, but he figured by that point he was so worked up worrying about the visit that he probably hadn't noticed if she'd been carrying it.

"Did you bring it?" he asked her and she nodded, "You must have left it in the car then."

"I'll go and see." Emmet said and Edward looked up to him gratefully before looking down to Lucy again and smiling slightly to her. She smiled back and he lightly kissed the top of her head. The room was silent again until Emmet returned carrying the doll. Lucy looked to him straight away and held her arms out to take it. Edward watched her with it, half blocking out everything else but he was brought out of that by his mum's next question.

"Are you with anyone at the moment?"

Edward looked up at that and automatically felt anger flare through him but he managed to keep it at bay.

"No. It's just me and Lucy like it always has been." he answered and everyone was looking at him in surprise which just made him scowl.

"You mean you've had no girlfriends all that time?" Alice asked amazed, five years was a long time to be on your own and Edward had always been a popular guy at school. Edward just shook his head and laughed slightly.

"What exactly do you all expect? I'm either working or looking after Lucy, there isn't time for girlfriends" he told them and they all looked away from him except his father who continued to glare at him.

"Oh...I just thought...that..." his mum started to stutter slightly, realising she had made a mistake. She hadn't meant it as he'd taken it, she'd honestly just wanted to know he wasn't on his own, she'd wanted him to have found someone but she could understand why he'd taken it wrong and wished she hadn't asked. It wouldn't do him any favours with Ed who she could see was looking at him in disbelief, automatically assuming he was lying. He'd never taken any time to actually listen to their youngest son, he had always just made his own assumptions.

"I know what you thought. You thought that because I fathered a child at fourteen I would have had a steady stream of girlfriends each worse than the one before. I wasn't even like that then, I didn't know what was happening, I still can't even remember that night." he responded angrily and Emmet decided to step in to try and calm him down seeing that this wasn't going to go in a good direction anytime soon if left to them.

"Edward nobody thought that." he said and Edward turned to look at him. He could see what Emmet was trying to do so didn't say anything but he knew his parents had thought that as he'd misread the uneasy look on his mother's face. They'd always thought of him as an irresponsible, girl crazed idiot. They couldn't have been further from the truth but nothing Edward could ever say would convince them of that. Lucy was looking up at Edward, sensing that something wasn't right again even though she hadn't been following the conversation. She didn't like it when Edward was upset or angry and right now she had the feeling he was both of those things. She moved slightly on his knee and hugged him, hoping it would help. She felt him hug her back.

"Thanks baby." he whispered to her and she smiled slightly. Everyone was watching them and could see how close Edward was to Lucy. Elizabeth could see he was obviously very good with her and was bringing her up well on his own and it made her wish that things could have been different but Ed was a well respected lawyer and they'd both come from very high class families. Appearances were everything and Ed had very firm ideas of how things should be. Even if Elizabeth did think they'd been wrong, she would never stand against her husband, what he said went in their household as it had always had.

"How long are you staying here?" Ed asked after a while, hoping they'd be leaving soon as he didn't want anyone to see Edward and Lucy at their house. As far as everyone around them knew, Edward had left to stay with his aunt in America to finish school before going to university there. He didn't want anyone to question that. Edward opened his mouth to say something but Emmet quickly cut across him.

"They're staying the night." he said, "I'll take them home in the morning." Edward turned to Emmet with pleading eyes, he just wanted to get home and out of this situation. He had wanted to see everyone for so long but he had never wanted it to be like this. He just wanted to get back home and forget it, just go back to it being him and Lucy. Emmet ignored him however, still set on his plan to just give them all time.

"I'll set the guest room up for Lucy, Emmet can set up his sofa bed in his room for you." Elizabeth commented but Edward shook his head.

"He doesn't have to, Lucy won't like being on her own in a strange place, she'll want me to stay with her." he muttered, it wasn't just Lucy who would need the comfort, he still wanted to just go home but he needed Emmet and his car to do so, so he was stuck with whatever plans Emmet had.

"Ok." She responded and then they fell into an awkward silence again. Edward was watching Lucy who was shuffling around on his knee, obviously getting bored. He knew it would do them both some good if they could get out of the house for a while. He didn't know how much more of the awkward silences he could take and he didn't want to get Lucy upset again.

"Is there a park or anything around here I could take Lucy to? She's getting bored." he asked, looking up and around at everyone. It was a nice area they were in so he was pretty certain there'd be somewhere he could take Lucy.

"Yeah, there's a large park nearby with a duck pond and swings and stuff." Alice answered and Edward smiled in relief as Lucy looked up at the mention of ducks.

"You want to go see some ducks?" he asked her to which she nodded excitedly as a large grin spread across her face. Alice was looking at them slightly quizzically and Edward glanced up and noticed.

"She has an obsession with ducks, no idea why but she loves them." he explained and Alice smiled before jumping up from her spot on their sofa.

"Ok, I'll go get some bread then." she said cheerfully and Edward found himself smiling at his little sister, she always had been enthusiastic with things and now the focus was off their parents' questions it was hard not to get caught up in her cheerful mood.

"Come on Luce, Aunty Alice is going to take us to feed some ducks." he told her as he lifted her off his knee and onto the floor. He took hold of her hand to follow Alice and Emmet stood up to join them.

"I'll come with you." he said happily, getting Edward away from their parents was definitely a good idea. He figured that maybe once they'd had some time to get over the shock of seeing him again they might act better towards him. Edward didn't seem to mind Alice or himself tagging along on the trip to the park so Emmet was relieved to think it was just his parents that made him feel uncomfortable and that he was maybe willing to let him and Alice back into his life.

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><p><em>The title for this chapter comes from one of my favourite songs (sorry I can't work out how to make this spaced properly. It looks right in the word file and I tried altering it on here and its just not playing nice):<em>

_All At Once - Charlie Simpson_

_Some of us will live our lives like we are just living life on the run_

_Some of us will die in our old age; others of us will die young._

_But sometimes it feels like I am just getting so many things wrong_

_It feels like I'm walking down my last mile and my god it just feels so long._

_Please just slow it down, I'm walking off these years_

_Please just slow it down, 'cause I can't stand the tears._

_But I would not expect you to understand it_

'_Cause things never turned out the way we planned it_

_I just hope that I would know you and _

_I would never have to walk this world alone._

_I would not expect you to ever notice_

_You never had the time to be overjoyed with me_

_Well if you could hear me now dear_

_Then I wouldn't want to lose it all at once._

_Some of us will live our lives like we are just dragging our heels through the night._

_Some of us will stay in the darkest cove while some of us will find the light_

_And sometimes it feels like I am just getting so many things wrong_

_It feels like I'm walking down my last my mile and my god it just feels so long._

_Please just slow it down, I'm walking off these years_

_Please just slow it down, 'cause I can't stand the tears._

_But I would not expect you to understand it_

'_Cause things never turned out the way we planned it_

_I just hope that I would know you and_

_I would never have to walk this world alone._

_I would not expect you to ever notice_

_You never had the time to be overjoyed with me._

_Well if you could hear me now dear_

_Then I wouldn't want to lose it all at once._


	11. Chapter 9 All At Once Part 2

_Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer_

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><p><strong>Chapter 9 – All At Once Part 2<strong>

They walked in silence for a while after leaving the house, Lucy still holding tightly onto Edward's hand. Glad her dad now seemed happier than he had in the house Lucy had let her attention wander to Emmet and Edward looked down to her as he felt her grip on his hand go. He watched her, about to take hold of her hand again to make sure she didn't get lost but then realised why she had let go. She was now holding onto Emmet's hand who was looking down at her in surprise. Lucy however seemed unaware of that and was skipping slightly as they walked. Edward smiled at seeing her happy and Emmet looked away from Lucy and to him. He smiled back when he caught Edward's glance before he looked back to Lucy and started talking to her about the ducks. Edward watched them for a few steps before he became aware of Alice beside him, watching him. He turned his head slightly to look at her and saw she looked slightly worried.

"What happened to you?" she asked and Edward looked to her confused.

"What do you mean?"

"Those bruises were bad before they faded." she replied and he nodded slightly. He'd got used to seeing them now and they didn't really hurt anymore so he'd been finding it easier to forget they were there.

"Somebody beat me up a week ago. Don't know who and don't know why. Woke up in an alley the morning after." he answered her.

"Did they hurt Lucy?" She asked still looking concerned and Edward shook his head while looking in front of them to where Emmet and Lucy were walking oblivious to anything else around them as they were still talking about the ducks.

"No, she wasn't with me at the time." he told Alice, trying hard not to think of what could have happened that day. At the time he hadn't given it much thought, just glad to be home and find Lucy safe and well but ever since the what if's of the situation had haunted him. They could so easily have hurt or taken Lucy that day and he couldn't stand the thought of it.

"Has it happened before?" she asked and he shook his head again.

"No, it's the first time I've ever had any trouble like that." he told her and he was relieved when she seemed to decide to drop that subject there and didn't ask where Lucy had been, he didn't want to admit he'd left her on her own.

"What did Emmet mean by where you're living being run down?" she asked next and Edward sighed. He knew she'd worry about what Emmet had said and it really wasn't that bad to him. They had a roof over their heads, it kept them warm and fairly safe and he could afford to pay the rent and bills which was all that mattered.

"It's not that bad, just not at all like your home. It's the best I can get, we're lucky to have found the place. If I hadn't me and Lucy would probably have been on the streets for quite a while." he answered hoping that that answer would satisfy her, things could have been a lot worse for them. He knew he'd been extremely lucky by running into his landlord when he did, he helped them so much in the beginning and he was sure his rent was still unusually cheap, even for where they lived.

"What's it like?" she questioned, her curiosity still strong and Edward just shrugged,

"It's a flat, two bedrooms, kitchen, sitting room and bathroom." he muttered not really wanting to go into more description and thankfully Alice decided to leave it there so he decided to ask some questions of his own to distract her.

"So...how are things with you? Emmet said something about you having a boyfriend now?"

"Yeah, we've been going out for a year now. You'd probably like him actually, he's into the same kind of things as you. In fact you might know him, I think he was in your year at school." she answered, a glazed smile appearing across her face that made Edward laugh slightly. She was obviously very taken with him and Emmet didn't seem to have a problem with it so he assumed that meant he treated her right. He was glad she was happy.

"What's his name?" he asked, wondering if he did actually know the guy. Emmet hadn't really gone into much detail the night before, too interested in finding out everything about Edward.

"Jasper." she answered happily and Edward recognized the name.

"Whitlock?" he asked, just to make sure he was thinking of the same person and Alice nodded.

"You know him then?" she questioned, her smile lighting up her face.

"Yeah, we were friends in school." He told her. He was one of the very few people who had ever actually known him. Jasper was a fairly quiet guy, he'd always liked people watching and tended to be able to see right through someone to who they really were. He was the kind of person you could trust with anything and he had always been happy to listen. He also had an uncanny knack for dissolving arguments before they could get too heated which had been a rather useful ability with some of the boys in their group of friends. He'd be a calming influence on Alice's usually hyperactive nature and he could picture them being good together. He hoped they'd last as he knew Jasper would look after his little sister.

"You should meet up with him, he'd like to see you again. It was how we ended up dating as he hung out with Emmet a lot helping him try to track you down."

Edward didn't know what to say to that so he let the conversation drift into silence. He wouldn't be contacting Jasper but he didn't want to upset Alice yet so he left it unsaid. He'd cut himself off from everyone to avoid being hurt again and this visit was proving that to have been the right thing to do. If his own parents couldn't accept him he didn't have much hope for anyone else doing so.

"Have you seriously had no girlfriends?" she queried after a while, too curious to let the silence last long.

"Not a one." he replied and he could see the pity and sadness in her eyes as she looked at him. It was nice to have someone believe him for once but the pity just sparked his anger off. He didn't want people feeling sorry for him.

"Don't you get lonely?" she asked and he shrugged, jamming his hands into his jeans pockets.

"I have Lucy." he answered simply not wanting to snap at his sister, she was just worried about him he tried to remind himself. Girlfriends had never really seemed that important to him. He had Lucy and the only experience he had really had with a girl had ended in nothing but trouble, confusion and pain for him. He didn't really feel like going through all that again, one child on his own he could cope with - two he wasn't so sure about.

"Yeah but don't you want someone your own age you can talk to and just be close with?" Alice probed, wanting to know how Edward really was. When they'd last known him he'd been a popular kid, he'd had a large group of friends around him and plenty of interest from girls. He'd never seemed to be a solitary person.

"It's not as simple as that." he muttered wishing she'd drop it before he really did get angry with her. She may have believed his words yet she still seemed to be thinking about him the same way they always used to which was nothing like the man he'd grown to be. Her persistence with the subject was also bringing flashes of Bella to mind which was something he did not want to think about. He had been lonely lately, missing his family more than he had for a while and wondering what it would be like to be friends with the brown haired girl who'd been curious about him. He knew, like he'd known this visit would be a mistake, that trying to be friends with her would only end in pain. The frequency she was appearing in his thoughts and the difficulty he had forgetting her suggested that being friends with her wouldn't be enough.

"What do you mean?" Alice asked, not giving up. His shoulders hunched as he stared hard at the pavement thinking about the many reasons why no one would ever want to be with him.

"If I'm not at work I'm at home with Lucy, so where would I meet anyone? Plus what girl my age would be interested in a guy with a five year old?" he responded, reeling off the reasons that didn't hurt so much. There was also the fact he had nothing to offer anyone, he earned just enough to look after Lucy, he couldn't afford dates along with the fact he was pretty sure no one could ever want someone as broken as he was. What had happened with his family had hurt him so much that he'd had to close himself off, not only did he find it impossible to trust anyone but he'd pretty much forgotten how to interact normally with people outside of work or Lucy. The stunted conversations he was having with his family were showing that perfectly.

"Couldn't you get someone to look after her for a night and go out or something?" Alice pushed on as they reached the park, unaware of just how uncomfortable this conversation was making him.

"There isn't anyone who could and I don't have the money to pay for a babysitter." he answered shortly. He was done with this conversation. Emmet and Lucy were quite a way ahead of them now and Edward wished she was back at his side.

"Well now you're back in contact with us maybe me and Emmet could look after her sometimes for you." she suggested and Edward stopped walking to look at her realising she hadn't worked out what would happen after this visit was over.

"Thanks but it isn't going to happen. I never wanted to come here in the first place, Emmet pretty much made me. When I go home tomorrow that's probably the last I'll see of you. You can see how our parents are with me. They still think I'm a disgrace and don't want me anywhere near you lot." he told her and she looked down unhappily. He hated the fact that it hurt her but it had to be done. He didn't want to cause problems between his brother and sister and their parents. It wasn't fair on them. He also didn't want Lucy to start wondering why they didn't live somewhere like the big house his parents owned, he didn't want her to see what she was missing out on when there was nothing he could do about it. He'd miss his brother and sister but it was either all or nothing, he couldn't pull Alice and Emmet down into his world or allow Lucy glimpses of a life they could never really have.

"Daddy!" Lucy shouted, finally putting an end to their conversation as she ran up to them and straight into Edward's arms as he crouched down to meet her.

"What are you so excited about?" he asked her as she grinned at him.

"Uncle Emmet found the ducks!" she told him happily and he forced himself to smile back at her and look cheerful.

"We'd better go and feed them then hadn't we?" he commented to which she nodded enthusiastically. Edward straightened back up as Lucy grabbed hold of his hand, dragging him to where Emmet was stood by a pond that was covered in ducks. Alice crouched down next to Lucy and handed her a piece of bread which she ripped a piece off and threw to the ducks. She watched happily as all the ducks went for it and then looked up to Edward who smiled for real at her happy face.

They stayed out there all afternoon, feeding the ducks, playing in the playground and eating ice cream from the small hut in the park that sold snacks and a few toys. Lucy had got tired after a couple of hours though so Edward had to carry her as they walked back to his parents' house. She had one arm around his neck and the other was clamping a small soft toy duck Emmet had brought her from the hut to her side as she sucked her thumb, her head resting against Edward's shoulder. It had been a nice afternoon and Edward had enjoyed spending time with his brother and sister even if he wouldn't be able to do it again, it would be a nice memory.

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><p>When they got back into their parents' house Edward was glad for the chance to put Lucy down - she was getting too big to be carried long distances. He took her through to the living room, carefully putting her down on the sofa where she curled up, cuddling the duck toy and causing Edward to smile at how cute she looked.<p>

"Are you feeling ok?" he asked, after watching her for a moment and wondering if whatever was wrong with her stomach the previous night was coming back as she didn't normally tire quite so easily. She nodded though and smiled sleepily so he assumed the excitement of the day had just gotten to her, it had been pretty rough in places and he was beginning to feel tired himself.

"Just tired?" he checked just to make sure and she nodded again so he leant down and gently stroked her hair away from her face before kissing her forehead as she closed her eyes. Satisfied that Lucy was ok and just taking a nap Edward decided to go and find everyone else so followed the sound of their voices to the kitchen. The conversation stopped the instant he stepped through the door as everyone's eyes snapped to him.

"Oh carry on talking about me, I'll go back to Lucy and leave you to it." He sighed, instantly feeling on edge again even after all the fun they'd had in the park. There was no forgetting how unwelcome he was in this house. He felt out of place just standing in their large shiny kitchen which looked as though it was brand new and never used by how clean it was. He wanted to leave but as Emmet was pretty much holding him prisoner for the night by refusing to drive them home he figured he'd be better off hiding out with Lucy in the living room. He still felt out of place there but at least he wouldn't be stared at or have to answer awkward questions.

"No! Edward, stay in here and talk, we were just telling Mum and Dad about our afternoon in the park." Alice said quickly, reaching out and grabbing hold of his hand as he tried to turn away. He didn't believe that was all they'd been talking about but Alice wasn't going to let him leave the kitchen so with his eyes cast down he sunk into the chair next to her at the table.

"How's Lucy?" Emmet asked to try and ease him into a conversation and keep him calm. He knew bringing up Lucy was the best way to do that, it hadn't taken him long to see how much comfort Edward found in his little girl.

"She's tired out, fast asleep on the sofa." he answered with a slight smile as he thought of her.

"Did she have fun then?" Elizabeth asked quietly and Edward glanced up at her trying to judge whether she actually cared about the answer or was just trying to be civil for Alice and Emmet's sakes.

"Yeah, she loves ducks and swings." he answered and the slightly uncomfortably smile she gave before looking down into the cup of tea she was holding killed the hope that she'd cared. Looking away from her Edward caught the stare his father was giving him as he studied the fading bruises on his face and he knew the conversation was probably about to get out of hand.

"Do you get into fights often?" he finally asked causing Edward to glare at him as his anger came back in full force but he made himself stay calm. He didn't want to be the one who started an argument.

"I didn't get into a fight and never have been in one." he answered and his father laughed slightly and shook his head. Emmet saw Edward bristle at that response and groaned wondering why they couldn't just have a nice friendly calm conversation.

"So...what? You just fell down a set of stairs or something?" he asked sarcastically.

"No, I don't know what happened. I can't remember anything." Edward answered in a hurt and angry hiss. He knew his father didn't think much of him after Lucy's arrival but hearing just how little he thought of him hurt worse than he would have thought.

"Well you obviously did something to upset someone. You seem to have a habit for not remembering things don't you?" Ed pointed out.

"I haven't done anything to anyone. All I do is work and look after Lucy." Edward answered absolutely reeling in anger. Emmet was now stood behind him, also glaring at their father, fuming that he had started this. He wanted Edward to be accepted back yet their father seemed determined not to let that happen. He knew he was a proud and shallow man but this was taking it to extremes. He just couldn't see the man standing in front of him, all he could see was the skewed version he'd concocted in his mind and he would most likely never see the truth. Emmet was going to have to apologise to Edward after all this was over, he needed to know that he had honestly thought things would go well. He would never have brought him here if he'd known their parents would make things worse, he just would have tried to get Edward to accept himself and Alice into his life without involving them.

"Really?" Ed asked sceptically. There was no way he believed that, Edward had to have done something to cause it.

"Do you really think I'd do anything to cause trouble knowing I have Lucy and have to look after her by myself? Do you really think so little of me that you can believe I would do something that would endanger her?" Edward shouted, his temper finally being lost as he pushed to his feet and away from the table.

"Yes!" his father yelled back and everyone looked at him in shock, including Edward who stood looking at him, frozen to the spot and hurt. How could his own dad really think that of him?

"You really think that of me?" he asked quietly, now shaking from his anger and pain. Ed didn't say anything, just glared at him so he turned and left the kitchen. He had to get out of there and now so he went straight to Lucy who was sat up awake after being woken by the shouting.

"We're going to go now baby." he said gently, trying to stop the tears from welling up in his eyes but he could feel them getting itchy. He reached out and picked her up, finding some comfort as she wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head on his chest. He shifted her so he was holding her against him with one arm and reached down to pick up her doll and toy duck. Lucy removed one arm from around his neck to take hold of them so he could hold her with both arms again and they were met by Emmet and Alice in the corridor as they reached the front door.

"Edward what are you doing?" Emmet asked, halting Edward's escape as he turned to look at them.

"We're going home." he answered and as Emmet looked at Edward he was too shocked by his eyes to stop him from leaving. They were burning with anger and hurt, he could clearly see the tears welling up in them but he could also see the determination. He had never seen Edward like that before. Taking advantage of Emmet's shock Edward headed for the door again and left. He started walking quickly down the cold street, wanting to get away from the house as fast as possible even though he wasn't certain of the way home. His eyes were beginning to sting so he gave up and let the tears burn down his cheeks now that no one was there to witness them except Lucy. He hated her seeing him upset but he knew there was no hiding it this time, he felt like he'd been torn apart all over again. The beating he had recently taken was nothing compared to the pain of knowing that his parents would never accept him back or see him for who he really was.

Lucy could tell he was upset as she could feel his chest rising and falling quickly as he took in irregular breaths. She didn't like it when he was like this but she knew it was best if she just stayed quiet and still, it would only upset him more if she got upset as well. He kept walking steadily and determinedly, holding Lucy close to him as he did and when he heard Emmet shouting to him back in the distance he didn't listen, just kept going. He didn't have a family anymore. All his hopes at making things right with them at some point in the future had been crushed and it was Emmet who had taken that from him. It really was just him and Lucy now, there would never be anyone else.


	12. Chapter 10 Parachute

_Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer_

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><p><strong>Chapter 10 – Parachute<strong>

The afternoon turned into evening and as the sunlight started to fade away the temperature dropped along with it. Edward could feel the cold stinging his face where the burning tears had been and Lucy cuddled closer into him trying to stay warm. They'd left his parent's neighbourhood and the houses they walked past gradually got less extravagant the longer they walked but they were still a long way from the large, worn down flat blocks their home was in.

As he continued walking Edward was reminded strongly of the night he was thrown out. He was walking down an empty street, Lucy in his arms as he cried, not really knowing where he was going then and that was what he was doing now. The only difference was this time he had an end destination even if he wasn't sure how long it would take him to get there. In some ways it was worse than that night almost five years ago as at least then he had been so shocked and confused at what was happening that it had almost numbed him and he'd pretty much functioned on autopilot trying to find shelter and calm Lucy. It hadn't given him chance to dwell on what had actually happened which was all he was doing now and it just made his tears reappear. He couldn't shut his thoughts off and all he could think of was that he really had lost his family and he was never going to have them back. There was no hope and it hurt a lot more without it. His anger had burnt out a couple of streets ago and in its place was the fear and emptiness that not even having Lucy in his arms could fill in that moment.

He had to stop a while later as Lucy had started to shiver so when they passed a bench Edward gently sat her down before taking his jacket off and wrapping it around her. When he was sure she was covered properly he lifted her back up again and she snuggled into his chest, yawned and closed her eyes, being tired enough to fall asleep now she was warmer.

Edward didn't know how long he'd been walking for and was hoping he'd start to see some roads he recognised soon as his determination was slowly dwindling with tiredness. His tears had finally stopped but his eyes were red and sore and he felt as though everything had been sucked out of him. He was just blindly walking, hardly knowing what his legs were even doing anymore. They ached from the steps and his arms ached from the weight of carrying Lucy so when he passed another bench a few streets later he decided to take a break and sit down for a couple of minutes.

As he sat there and looked around he realised he had no idea where they were. He'd been too nervous in the car earlier to really pay attention to where they were going and now that it was dark he didn't recognise the area at all. He hadn't been thinking clearly when he'd left his parent's house but now that he was it didn't make much difference. He'd no idea where the places listed on the few bus stops he'd passed where and hadn't even seen a bus the entire time they'd been walking so they didn't seem to be an option. He was also fairly sure he didn't have enough cash on him to call a taxi but pulled his wallet out of his pocket to check, being careful not to jostle Lucy too much so she wouldn't wake up. All it contained was a little loose change, his bank card and a ten pound note. He didn't know where they were, but he was sure it would be a much larger fare than that to get them home. Completely lost as to what to do he hugged Lucy close to his chest and buried his face in her hair. This day had to be verging on being his worst ever, and that was saying something when it came to him. He was shivering now that he'd stopped moving, the ache in his legs had grown and his back was beginning to ache too making him realise that sitting down had not been the best idea as he didn't want to move again now. As he sat there trying to work out how to get them home he could feel the exhaustion trying to take him over and he would have dozed off if it wasn't for the car that pulled up in front of them. The loud noise of the engine caught his attention and when he looked up there was a bright red classic mini with a white roof and bonnet stripes parked in front of him. His first thought was that he was glad it wasn't Emmet but that was quickly followed by a fresh wave of pain. He really didn't want to see his brother again right then but it hurt that he hadn't really tried to go after him. He'd gotten what he'd wanted and he knew it was for the best but it didn't stop his heart complaining. His second thought was that if it wasn't Emmet, there was no one else who was likely to stop to help him so he made a move to get up, wanting to leave before anything happened as with the day he'd had so far this couldn't have been good. He was that tired by that point however that by the time he'd got himself to his feet the car's engine had been switched off, the door opened and a brown haired girl in a familiar looking purple hooded top had climbed out.

"Edward?" she asked and he saw the moment she got close enough to really see him in the poor light as her eyes went wide before she frowned slightly and moved closer again. "Are you ok?"

He just shrugged and relaxed back into the bench as he was pretty sure Bella wouldn't attack him or Lucy so it was safe to stay there. Bella joined them, coming to a stop right in front of them and when he looked away to avoid her gaze he realised Lucy had woken up and was looking at Bella with a smile. Bella continued to look at them concerned, close up Edward looked terrible. His eyes were red and puffy while the rest of his skin was even paler than it usually was and he was shivering badly. It made her wonder why he was out in just a short sleeved t-shirt but then Lucy moved to peer at her car and she realised the leather jacket he usually wore was wrapped around her instead. She didn't believe for one moment that they were ok, but she figured if they were physically hurt Edward would have said something so she didn't question his shrug any further.

"What are you guys doing round here?" She asked instead. It was getting late and she didn't think he lived in this area as it was miles away from Lucy and Anna's school and she'd always seen them walking to and from there. When her lights had flashed over the man sitting on the bench it had been the shade of his hair that had caught her attention but with being so far away from the school she hadn't thought it could have been him. She'd only stopped as she'd noticed the little figure huddled up on his lap and guessed that anyone out this late with a child might have needed help. She was glad she had stopped now as her assumption seemed to have been right.

He shrugged again. "I think we're lost."

She was frustrated by his lack of any real answers to her questions but if their previous conversations were anything to go by she figured that was just his nature. He never seemed that willing to talk.

"Where were you headed?"

"Home."

Well there was no way she was going to leave him there so she went back to the car and unlocked it, bending down to pull the driver's seat forward and out of the way.

"Come on then, I'll give you a lift. Anna's booster seat is in the back so it's ok for Lucy."

Edward just stared at her unsure of what to do. He didn't want anyone to see him with how upset he was right now, especially not Bella but it was cold, he didn't know where they were and he wasn't sure he could even keep walking. He didn't want to inconvenience her though.

"You don't have to. I'm sure you've already got plans."

"I was just going home actually so get in. We're at least a half hour from the school by car, I'm not going to let you walk all that way and it's way too cold for all this standing around."

He hated having to accept help from her but he knew he wouldn't have been able to get them home on his own that night and it was obvious she wasn't going to leave without him so he gave in. Lucy seemed to have no problems at all with going with Bella as she climbed down from Edwards lap and went straight to the car. Bella smiled at her and helped her into the back seat. Edward had joined them by then too so Bella asked him to hold the driver's seat in place while she followed Lucy into the back to get her buckled into the booster seat. He watched her, wondering how she was managing to move around inside the car without hitting her head. It looked tiny on the inside and the roof of the car didn't even reach chest level for him. She must have been used to it though as she got back out with no injuries. He let go of the seat and Bella let it fall back into place then slid into it so she could reach over and unlock the passenger door for Edward to get in. Luckily the front seats seemed to have a lot more space than the back and he found it was surprisingly comfortable, although it felt a little odd being so low down.

"Edward and Lucy meet Poppy. She's a little temperamental but I love her." Bella said while patting the steering wheel. Edward looked at her a little confused before it clicked that she was talking about her car. He glanced into the back to check on Lucy to find her looking around at the interior of the car with a small smile still in place. He jumped and turned back to Bella when the car suddenly roared to life and Bella looked at him sheepishly before reaching forward and pushing in a large button that stuck out from the middle of the dashboard underneath the radio.

"Sorry about that, didn't need the choke out." She commented and he had no idea what she was talking about but the engine sounded a lot quieter now. She pulled out the large button on the opposite end of the row to the first making a gust of cold air hit him and he wondered what she was doing.

"It'll heat up in a minute. So...where do you live?" she asked as she pulled away from the curb. Edward looked down at his hands, he didn't want her to know where he lived and he thought about just asking her to drop them off at the school but he really didn't feel up to walking any further. Everything ached and he was so tired he just wanted to collapse so in the end he gave her his address. She didn't know it straight away but after a few directions she worked out where they were going. It was silent in the car then and Edward leant his head against the window as now that it had heated up he felt like falling asleep, it also helped hide his face and stop Bella seeing the evidence of how embarrassingly pathetic he was.

Bella kept glancing at him as she drove. It was dark in the car so she couldn't really see him that clearly but he looked so sad and defeated. The curiosity as to what had happened to upset him so badly this far away from home was killing her. She didn't think he'd take too well to her questioning him but she wanted to break the silence they were sitting in and maybe talking about what ever had happened would help.

"How did you come to be lost all the way out here?"

Edward just shrugged in response. He didn't want to talk about it and even if he had, he didn't really know Bella. There was no way he wanted her to know what his own family thought of him and he couldn't explain how he came to be where ever they were without including them in the story. She'd been doing well so far at acting like there was nothing glaringly wrong about his situation. He didn't want to make that harder for her when they'd have to talk for the girls' sake plus he didn't think he could stand to see her reaction to it all, especially not while he was so torn open already. Talking couldn't fix what was wrong in his life anyway, nothing could. He'd just have to make the best of it like he always had and pretend nothing had happened. He'd managed it before so he could do it again. He still had Lucy and she was all he really needed. He'd get by.

Bella let him sit in silence after that as she didn't want to push him. She could see him rubbing at his eyes occasionally as she drove and tried to think of something to say to him that would distract him from whatever was upsetting him but as she hardly knew him she didn't know what to say. He'd stopped shivering now though so at least she'd been able to help with that.

Catching sight of Lucy in the rear view mirror when they'd come to a stop at a set of lights gave her an idea though. Having drawn a complete blank on conversations to lighten the mood earlier with Edward she figured that starting one with Lucy instead might work. Edward always seem to pay attention to what Lucy said and if she could get Lucy chatting then maybe it would take his mind off whatever was tormenting him.

"What do you think of Poppy Lucy?" she asked and heard Edward move in his seat as he turned to look at Lucy over the head rest.

"I like her." She answered Bella. It was a lot smaller than her uncle's car and the noise of the engine was louder but she liked it. It was strangely comforting.

"Good, we wouldn't want to hurt Poppy's feelings." Bella commented and Edward found himself looking back to her with the absurdness of that statement.

"Your car has feelings?" he asked, he'd liked her randomness in the park and it looked like it was probably a constant with her. He'd never known anyone before who had named their car, never mind declaring it had feelings.

"Of course." She replied, glancing at him with a smile which he found himself returning without conscious thought to do so.

"You do know it's just a metal box with an engine and some wheels right?"

Bella gasped in mock outrage making Lucy giggle in the back and Edward's smile grew at the sound of that.

"Don't you dare say that! She'll break down on us to teach you a lesson and then you'll be sorry." She warned and noticed Edward was now looking at her like she was insane but he looked happy and Lucy was still giggling in the back so it was worth it. Besides, Poppy probably would break down on them for that, she hadn't been lying when she'd said she was temperamental so she said a silent apology to the car in her head and promised that if she got them home without any trouble she'd wash and wax her sometime that week. Glad that Edward seemed to have been distracted for the time being, Bella told them a couple of stories of the many breakdowns which had lead to her being named in the first place. Renee had thought the name Poppy was appropriate since the car was red and was always popping in and out of the garage and the name had stuck. That got Lucy giggling and Edward smiling again.

Bella managed to keep the conversation going for most of the journey and was surprised Edward stayed involved in it. He seemed to enjoy her silly stories about the car and it was nice to see him not appearing as wary and closed off as he usually was as he listened and asked a few questions here and there.

They finally turned into the car park for the large flat block Edward had directed her too. Bella couldn't see it very clearly as the area wasn't well lit but it didn't look like a particularly nice area and she wondered if she'd got the right building but guessed she had when Edward started to get out of the car. She turned the engine off and got out as well so they could get Lucy out the back.

"Thanks for the lift." Edward said quietly once Lucy was in his arms, She was starting to fall asleep again with her head resting against his shoulder and her eyes closing with long slow blinks.

"You're welcome. I hope the rest of your weekend goes a bit better." Bella responded as she got back into her car. She was pleased he seemed happier than he had when she'd found them on the bench, he didn't look so defeated anymore.

"Thanks. We'll see you at school on Monday I guess."

"Actually I don't think Anna will be at school on Monday, we think she's coming down with the flu. When she's well again we'll have to talk about Lucy coming over though. I'm sure the thought of that will cheer them both up."

"Ok, I hope she gets better soon. We better get inside, thanks again for the lift." He responded, fidgeting a little before he smiled slightly and turned away. Lucy lifted her head up to look over his shoulder as he walked and waved to Bella who waved back.

"Look after yourself!" She called after them making him turn to look at her again. She couldn't read the expression on his face well from that distance but he looked confused before he nodded then turned back around and continued walking. She stayed and watched them go inside before starting the car and heading home. She hoped he'd be ok. She was worried for him as although she thought she'd managed to cheer him up a little he hadn't looked well as he'd stood in the light from her headlights. He may have managed a slight smile, and the total defeat that had been in his eyes had gone but he'd still looked pale and tired and there'd been something lurking just behind the surface of his eyes that she hadn't liked. She got the impression that whatever had caused them to be sitting on that bench was bad and she wanted to help but she'd seen the struggle he'd had just to accept the lift from her, she didn't think he'd accept any more help and she wasn't even sure if there would have been anything she could do anyway. Cheering him up a little for the last half hour and getting them home safely would just have to be enough.

* * *

><p>The second he heard Bella drive away everything that had happened that day came crashing back down on him along with his exhaustion. He didn't make it any further than his sofa where he curled up, still holding Lucy, who cuddled into him and fell asleep almost instantly. He buried his face into her hair, trying to find some kind of comfort and the smell of her hair did calm him but not enough for sleep to claim him. It wasn't just the disastrous visit to his parent's house that kept replaying on a constant loop behind his closed eyes that was keeping him awake. If it had just been that he probably could have fallen asleep as it was the same pain and thoughts he'd had for years, and although it had all been freshly exposed, he was used to it. It was more the fact he didn't understand what had happened in Bella's car that was keeping him awake. One minute he'd been upset, lost and uncomfortable about accepting her help, the next she'd managed to get him smiling and wondering over her sanity. He was grateful she'd stopped to give them a lift, he would never have been able to get them home that night without her but he didn't know how she'd managed to distract him from everything so easily and it worried him. For the half hour he was in her car the hurt had gone away and he'd enjoyed listening to her stories about Poppy, they'd made Lucy giggle and Bella smile as she spoke and it had felt normal, he'd liked it. Then she'd driven away and everything else flooded back and he couldn't even work out why she'd bothered to stop to help them in the first place or why she seemed to care how he was when his parent's couldn't bring themselves to do the same. None of it made sense to him but his exhaustion finally won the battle against his thoughts only for the nightmare he'd been dreading since Emmet showed up to make an appearance.<p>

* * *

><p>"<em>Edward get down here now!" His father yelled up the stairs as Edward sat on his bed reading, he looked up from his book wondering what he'd done now as his father didn't sound happy with him. Sighing, he sat the book down on his bed and trudged down the stairs to find his father stood at the bottom of them looking incredibly angry.<em>

"_In there, you've got a visitor." He told him, pointing Edward towards the living room. He went in without even questioning it as his father really did not look happy, though Edward couldn't think of a reason why he would be so angry over a visitor, the only people that would visit him were Jasper and Peter and he liked both of them. None of them had done anything to cause any trouble recently. They hadn't even tried to have a party or anything like that for his sixteenth birthday the week before. All in all it had been a pretty quiet and uneventful summer holiday and he couldn't think of anything that would warrant this level of anger. Stepping through the living room door he froze his eyes glued to the girl currently sat on his sofa holding a bundle of blankets, a bag sat by her feet. He recognised her from school, she was a couple of years older than him and as he studied her he got a rather disconcerting feeling that he should remember more about her than that. Moving his gaze around the room his saw his mum was sat opposite the girl, her gaze fixed to the bundle of blankets, her face pale._

_Edward didn't understand what was going on._

"_Would you like to explain this?" his father suddenly asked from behind him, making him jump and turn to face him._

"_I, I don't understand." He stuttered, looking up at him confused, noticing that his face was looking thunderously angry as he was about to speak again but at that point Edward heard a baby sounding gurgling noise and turned to look at the girl again, seeing that the bundle of blankets was actually a baby. That made him even more confused as he didn't understand why this girl who as far as he could remember had never even talked to him had turned up at his house, with a baby._

"_What's going on?" he asked quietly, glancing from the girl to his mother who was still looking incredibly pale and had her eyes glued to the baby and then back to his father who, if possible, looked even more angry._

"_Don't act so stupid. Apparently that baby is yours." He told him, his voice quiet but with the tone that had been used Edward knew if it wasn't for the fact there was a baby in the room he would be shouting by now._

"_What? But...no...I..." he started, but stopped as it suddenly hit him why he had felt odd when he first saw the girl. There had been a party just over a year ago. He couldn't remember a lot of what had happened that night apart from talking to a boy from his year who'd introduced him to his sister. It had been their leaving party as their whole family had moved away shortly after. He couldn't remember anything after that moment but had woken up in his own bed the following morning and had just assumed he'd gotten drunk and Emmet had taken him home. He'd never questioned what had happened that night until now. The girl sitting on their sofa was the one from the party. He felt sick._

"_Remembering now are we?" his father snarled at him, watching as Edward had turned pale, a slight look of recognition crossing his face before he had turned to look at the girl and baby. Seeing she had Edward's attention and how things seemed to be going with his parents the girl stood up and walked over to Edward, forcing the baby into his arms._

"_She's called Lucy and she's five months old. I don't want her, I want my life back. It was either you or putting her in care." She told him before quickly leaving the room and Edward was too shocked to follow her. It was only the slamming of the front door that brought him back and he raced to it, pulling it open and running out a few steps just to see her retreating back._

"_She can't be mine!" he yelled after her causing her to stop and turn around._

"_She is. I wouldn't lie about it. Everything she needs is in that bag." She replied before turning round once more and leaving Edward stood there holding the baby, watching her go. He stayed there for a few minutes before he was suddenly dragged back inside the house by his father and none too carefully thrown back into the living room._

"_This is some kind of mistake." He tried, desperately wanting his father to stop looking so angry with him. He couldn't get his own head around the fact he now appeared to have a daughter, he didn't think he could take being yelled out and questioned about it too._

"_The birth certificate has your name on it." His father told him, still glaring and causing Edward to back away slightly and look to his mum._

"_That doesn't mean she's mine! That girl could have put anyone's name down." He argued but his mum shook her head._

"_She looks like you did as baby, she has your eyes." She told him quietly. Edward knew it was pointless to argue, he knew the baby probably was his, he'd felt it as soon as he'd held her but his mind didn't want to accept that fact._

"_You don't even know the mothers name do you?" his father suddenly asked._

"_She's a couple of years above me at school." He answered truthfully and that seemed to finally snap something in his dad._

"_You've fathered a baby at fourteen and don't even know the mothers name? I thought we'd brought you up better than that. I want you out of this house now, and don't ever come back. You're no longer part of this family, you're a disgrace!" He roared as Edward cowered away, moving back towards his mother._

"_Mum, please, I can't even remember sleeping with her. Someone introduced her to me at a party, that's all I remember. Please don't chuck me out, please!" he pleaded and he could see that she was close to tears but she said nothing, just got up from her seat and left the room heading for the kitchen. The thumping on the stairs announced Emmet and Alice's arrival into the room after hearing their father shouting and wanting to know what had happened, they froze on seeing the baby._

"_Dad, please! I don't even know how to look after a baby. I can't do it on my own, please don't do this, please." He tried, turning back to him but already knowing it was pointless._

"_You must have known what you were doing. You got yourself into this situation now you can deal with it on your own. I want you out. You've got half an hour to pack everything you need and then you're gone." He said coldly, turning away from Edward and going to the kitchen as tears slid down Edward's cheeks. _

_Edward just stood there looking to his brother and sister, desperately hoping that someone would help him. He stood no chance on his own; he didn't have a clue what he'd do. Emmet watched him for a minute as he stood there crying, holding a baby in his arms before he too turned and went to the kitchen leaving only Alice stood there._

"_Edward what's happening?" she asked as she moved forward towards him to get a better look at the baby._

"_Turns out I'm a dad, this is Lucy and Dad's chucking me out." He told her, sounding detached before he suddenly shot past her and up the stairs. She watched him go before going to join the rest of the family in the kitchen where she found Emmet arguing with their father trying to get him to change his mind._

_Edward got to his room and carefully laid the baby down on his bed before dragging out the largest rucksack he'd got. He then started throwing his clothes into it before going to the bathroom to get his wash stuff and toothbrush which then went into his bag too. After that he went to his wardrobe and pulled out an old box which he took the lid off of before sorting through all the photos that lay in it. Finding the ones he wanted he shoved those into the bag too before collecting up a few more things and finding the bag was full. Fastening it up he went back to his wardrobe and pulled out his coat, putting it on before slinging the rucksack over his shoulder and picking up the baby again. It was then that he looked at her properly, moving the blankets slightly so he could see her face as she stared up at him. He couldn't believe she was his but staring at her it didn't even cross his mind that he could give her away even if it might make things right with his parents. He was feeling what it was like to be dumped by your parents now and her mother had already done that to her. He was all she had and by the looks of it she was all he had too. _

"_Times up Edward!" he heard his father shout from downstairs so he angrily rubbed his tears away before going back down the stairs where he saw all his family stood._

"_Please let him stay Dad, this isn't right." He heard Emmet say just before he reached the bottom._

"_Either shut up now Emmet or you can join him." Their father spat and by then Edward had reached the bottom of the stairs. His father forced him to take hold of the bag Lucy's mother had left then grabbed hold of Edward's arm and dragged him to the door, opening it up and pushing him out before slamming it shut and locking it. Edward stared at the locked door before slowly sliding down to be sat on the doorstep his back resting against it. He cuddled his baby close to his chest as he looked down at her and couldn't help crying as he just sat there trying to think what to do and where to go. He had just come to the conclusion that he couldn't go to any friends house as he couldn't face it if they turned their backs on him too when Lucy joined in his crying. Startled he tried to rock her to quiet her but that didn't work and he found himself even more lost than before._

* * *

><p>This was another Charlie Simpson inspired chapter title:<p>

Parachute – Charlie Simpson

.

I don't need a parachute

You don't need to ask if I'm ok

I can look after myself.

We've been walking for hours now

My feet are starting to itch,

Blisters cracked all over my skin

My shoes don't even fit.

.

I'm so sorry for the pain, sorry for the ache, sorry for the moods I'm swinging

But I don't need your hand, I don't need your heart, I don't need a parachute.

.

I have tried to carry you

As far as I can go,

But I'm not strong

Enough to do this on my own.

I packed my bags to leave this town

Cause I'm not welcome back here any more

Upon these shores.

.

I'm so sorry for the pain, sorry for the ache, sorry for the moods I'm swinging

But I don't need your hand, I don't need your heart, I don't need a parachute

I'm so sorry for the greed, sorry for the hate, sorry for the mess I left you,

But I don't want it back, I don't need it back, I don't need a parachute.

.

Well may the love that we share come alive tonight,

Yeah may the love that we share come alive tonight.

.

I'm sorry so for the pain, sorry for the ache, sorry for the moods I'm swinging

But I don't need your hand, I don't need your heart, I don't need a parachute.

I'm so sorry for the greed, sorry for the hate, sorry for the mess I left you,

But I don't want it back, I don't need it back, I don't need a parachute.


	13. Chapter 11 Love You Daddy

_Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer_

_**Warning: This chapter contains some violence.**_

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 11- Love You Daddy<strong>

Edward was eventually woken up by a loud bang coming from the kitchen. As he sat up and rubbed at his eyes trying to get them to open properly he heard the noise again and became aware of the fact that his arms were empty when they should have been holding Lucy. He felt awful, every part of him was aching and his head was killing him which he assumed was due to his exhaustion the day before but he got up and went through to the kitchen where he quickly woke up at the sight of Lucy stood on a chair by the units attempting to work the toaster.

"Lucy you don't do that!" he scolded as he ran across to her and lifted her off the chair.

"Wanted to make breakfast." she told him as he held her in a hug, relieved that she didn't seem to have hurt herself yet.

"Aww baby you know you don't touch things like the toaster, you should have woken me up." he told her before kissing the top of her head to let her know she wasn't really in trouble.

"I wanted to make it for you." she mumbled and Edward looked at her as she looked up at him with worried eyes so he smiled slightly to reassure her as he stroked her hair back from her face. He knew she was just trying to cheer him up and look after him after how upset he'd been the day before and he couldn't be angry at her for that.

"Thank you baby. Why don't we make it together?" he asked her and she smiled and nodded. He sat Lucy down in a chair at the table before putting the toast on and getting the jam and butter out along with a butter knife, which he sat on the table in front of Lucy. When the toast was done he put it onto two plates and gave them to Lucy.

"Be careful, they're still hot." he warned her, letting her spread the butter and jam over them. She did it messily and Edward watched her slightly amused, for the time being yesterday forgotten. He sat at the table opposite her and when she was done she pushed one of the plates across to him.

"Thanks." he said and Lucy smiled as she picked her slice up and took a bite from it. Edward couldn't help but laugh as she put the slice back down and smiled at him again, jam and butter all around her mouth.

"Somehow I think it might be wash time after this." he muttered as he started to eat his own toast. By the time they had finished Lucy was a sticky mess. She was happy though as Edward was laughing at the state of her, so she had succeeded in her original plan to cheer him up. She could have eaten her toast a lot less messily if she'd wanted to.

"Come on, let's get you cleaned up." Edward said as he stood so Lucy slid off her chair and followed him through to the bathroom where he made sure she got rid of every trace of stickiness from her face and hands. Again Lucy messed around, not doing it quite right so Edward would help her and she smiled as she saw him smiling at her and happy to be helping her. Once she was clean and he had his back turned to her as he hung the towel back up on the hook Lucy flicked water at him out of the filled sink. He turned around sharply as he felt the droplets land on his back and looked to Lucy who was stood smiling innocently at him, her hands clasped behind her back. He looked at her suspiciously though, a mischievous smile slowly spreading across his face.

"You just flicked water at me didn't you?" he asked slowly and she shook her head but he could see her fighting to hold back the grin that matched his.

"You sure about that?" he asked moving closer to her and with that she squealed and turned, running out of the bathroom with Edward chasing her. Their laughter rang through the flat as he chased her, trying to catch her and tickle her as pay back. Lucy knew she was going to get tickled but it was keeping him happy so she didn't mind. He finally did catch her by cornering her in the living room he stopped for a minute, his grin still in place as he looked at her face, flushed from the running and the laughter, her hair tumbling all around it, he loved seeing her happy like that. He snapped out of looking at her as she tried to move passed him and scooped her into his arms causing her to laugh again. He carried her to the sofa and dropped her down onto it before kneeling down on the floor and tickling her. She laughed and squirmed and he laughed too as he kept tickling her until he thought she was in danger of wetting herself and then he flopped down, his back leaning against the front of the sofa.

Lucy stayed laid out on the sofa until she had calmed down a bit and then she tumbled off it onto the floor beside Edward. He looked at her and she saw his eyes were alive with playfulness as he ruffled her hair so she grinned again and crawled up onto his lap.

"Love you Luce." he sighed as she looked up at him and he stroked her hair. Her face crossed with worry as she saw the playfulness leave his eyes to be replaced with sadness.

"Love you too Daddy." she replied as she hugged him.

* * *

><p>They spent the rest of the day playing together, Edward putting more enthusiasm into the games than normal as he tried to block all thoughts of the day before and convince Lucy everything was ok. She went to bed as her normal happy self, exhausted from all the playing and comforted that her daddy was happy but an hour later and Edward was left sat in the living room lonely with nothing but his thoughts for company. He was huddled on the sofa, his knees pulled up to his chest with his arms tightly wrapped around them staring blankly at the TV which was currently showing a wildlife documentary. While Lucy would have loved it, it held very little attraction for him but there was nothing else on and the background noise was slightly comforting. It wasn't enough though, he wanted his family and nothing could change that. After seeing them all again the dull ache he had before whenever he thought of them had turned into a constant stabbing pain. He wished now that Emmett had never stepped foot into the shop. Things were so much easier when he had grown used to not having a family but now after spending one day with them he had to get used to not having them all over again.<p>

He couldn't forget his father's last words; they kept running through his head along with the stone cold look he had given him. He couldn't understand how he could possibly think he would ever do something that could put Lucy in danger. She meant everything to him and would do anything to protect her and keep her safe. If he ever lost her he had no idea what he'd do, there would be no point to him existing. He couldn't believe his parents would think he was that irresponsible and uncaring. He had never given them reason to think that little of him. Sure he had made a mistake with Lucy's mum but he hadn't really had any control over that considering how drunk he must have ended up when he was sure he hadn't even intended to drink that night. He still couldn't remember what had even happened, he could vaguely remember speaking to Lucy's mother and her younger brother but the rest of the night was a total blank. What had come from that though he couldn't consider being bad either, the timing may have been totally wrong but Lucy was the best thing to have ever happened to him, he loved her completely yet his parents seemed to just see her as a disgrace. Although he knew it wasn't really her who they thought was a disgrace - it was him for bringing her into existence. They couldn't see past the fact that at fourteen he had fathered a child and that as far as they were concerned was a big no no.

He could feel his eyes burning with tears again and hated it but at least there was no on one there to see them this time. He just wanted them to see how much he had grown up and who he really was. He wanted them back so badly. He wanted to be able to just take Lucy round to see them whenever he wanted to, he wanted them to know and love her and he wanted them to accept and love him again.

He finally went to bed at half eleven, realising he had to sleep to be awake the next morning to get Lucy to school and himself to work. He curled himself up in his covers, hoping the warmth from it might comfort him and make him feel less lonely. It didn't work but he finally fell asleep after his eyes settled on one of Lucy's teddy bears that had been left on the floor by his bed.

* * *

><p>The next morning when he woke Lucy up she could tell he had been crying the night before. His eyes were still red and she could see the sadness lurking there alerting her to the fact he was still upset about his parents. She didn't really understand what had gone on at their house but she knew it wasn't good and that she was unlikely to meet all the new people again. She knew that that was upsetting Edward but she didn't know why things were so wrong, she hadn't been told anything and she couldn't work it out just from looking at him. She didn't want to ask though, if he wanted her to know he would tell her.<p>

She got ready for school quickly with no fuss, trying to make things easier for Edward and when they were both ready, Edward still looking a bit worse for wear, they started on their way to Lucy's school.

"Have fun." he told her, forcing himself to smile even though that was one of the last things he felt like doing as he crouched down to hug her and kiss her forehead. He couldn't let himself take his sadness out on her or let her be affected by it.

"Love you." Lucy chirped, sounding happy and bright in the hope it may rub off on him or make him feel better as she knew his moods often affected hers.

"Love you too baby, you better go in now, the bells just rung." he replied, about to stand up but Lucy grabbed his arm to stop him and kissed his cheek.

"Bye bye." she said as she turned and ran into the school and up to the doors. Edward stood up and watched her and he did smile slightly for real. He loved that little girl.

He turned away from the school and started his walk to work. His mind was still preoccupied with thoughts of his parents but now there were some slightly happier ones of Lucy floating around too. It came as a slight surprise to him when he realised he'd just stepped through the door of the shop and Garret was standing by the counter looking at him curiously.

"Rough weekend?" he asked as Edward got closer and he saw how tired and unhappy he looked. He also saw the tell tale signs of the tears that Lucy had seen and that worried him slightly. He had grown to like Edward a lot in the years he had worked for him. He had never really seen him upset before though, worried over Lucy and money but never really upset.

"You could say that." Edward muttered as he walked past him to dump his jacket.

"What happened this time?" Garret asked, hoping that everything was ok with Lucy.

"Don't want to talk about it." Edward replied sternly and Garret looked at him again before nodding.

"Well...you know if you need help or something you can ask." he said, wanting Edward to know that there was somebody he could talk to if he really wanted to, he knew he had no-one other than Lucy.

"Thanks." Edward mumbled awkwardly, he'd rather the subject was just dropped and to his relief from then on it was as Garret went through to the back to get on with some paperwork.

Edward's mind wasn't on his work all day, which showed when he attempted to put a Britney Spears CD into the case of what should have been a New Found Glory album and the customer had to point out what he was doing. When customers weren't in the shop he'd spent most his time staring at the CD cover with the duck on the front of it, where Emmett had appeared next to Lucy as she had looked at it. He still couldn't stop thinking of his family. He needed to take his mind off it, he knew he did but he just couldn't. When it got to the end of his shift he was glad it was, hoping that he could distract himself from his thoughts with Lucy. They had to go shopping before going home as with being gone at the weekend it hadn't been done yet and they needed food.

He reached Lucy's school and as he got there Lucy ran towards him, a piece of paper held tightly in one hand, flapping as she ran. She stopped in front of him and held the paper out to him. He looked at it and smiled at what he saw. Lucy had drawn a picture of what was meant to be them, just them, together and both smiling. She was holding tightly onto his hand and he was looking at her and smiling back to her in the picture. Lucy knew a lot more about what was going on than he had thought she did, she was a very bright child and he was thankful to her for what she was trying to do. He knew what the picture meant, she was trying to show him that they were fine by themselves, didn't need anyone else and she was happy just the way they were. He reached down and picked her up so he could hug her.

"Thank you baby, that means a lot to me." he told her as he kissed her forehead. She smiled slightly, happy that he had caught the meaning of it. Her aunty and uncle had seemed nice but she preferred to have Edward all to herself, she didn't really like sharing his attention with other people. She liked it when it was just them.

"We better go get the shopping done, then we can go home and have something for dinner." he told her as he put her down and took hold of her hand after carefully putting the picture into Lucy's school bag. Edward cheered up slowly as they walked to the shops with Lucy telling him all about her day at school. Anna had been off sick like Bella had warned so she'd played with a couple of other girls at lunch and breaks which was a rare occurrence for her. While she wasn't really shy with other children she did seem to stick pretty close to Anna most of the time. He hoped Lucy wasn't going to catch whatever bug Anna had, although he realised it might have been the same thing that had upset her on Friday night. It also made him think about Bella and their conversation in the car. He'd actually found he'd missed seeing her at the school gates and wouldn't have minded talking to her again. The way he'd felt in the car had been good and he wondered what it would be like to actually try and be friends with her. He was spending too much time in his own head and she seemed to be able to pull him out of that a little, maybe it would be worth trying to talk to her more but then that would depend on whether she'd actually want to be friends or if she'd helped him purely because the girls were friends and she'd felt obliged to. It had been way too long since he'd had friends and he didn't know how to trust anymore, it was all just too confusing and conflicting. He wanted to be friends with her, but he was scared to even try.

Shopping acted as a nice distraction from everything as Lucy helped him find everything they needed. They were nearly finished when they reached the freezer section and Lucy asked if they could get some ice cream, they hadn't had it for a while and she thought it might help Edward as she liked ice cream when she was feeling sad. He agreed to get some, as after his extra shift the last Friday he had a little extra cash so he opened up the freezer cabinet door and reached out to get a tub of strawberry ice cream - Lucy's favourite. Lucy however had other ideas and stopped him by tugging at his jeans. He looked at her and she shook her head.

"That one." she told him, pointing to a tub of chocolate which was Edward's favourite. He looked at her for a minute then replaced the tub of strawberry ice cream with the chocolate one before going to the checkout.

They spent the evening curled up on the sofa together, watching TV and sharing a large bowl of ice cream. It was exactly the type of afternoon and evening Edward had needed to finally lock the weekend away and put it all behind him. He tucked Lucy into bed with a smile and a kiss before settling down in his own bed. He may have lost his family, but they'd missed out on Lucy so really they were losing more than he was.

* * *

><p>Edward had already taken Lucy to school. They'd been a bit quicker with getting ready than normal so he was walking along slowly, his hands shoved in his pockets and his eyes watching the stone he was kicking a long in front of him. He wasn't paying attention to where he was going, too busy wondering whether he should agree to do the extra Saturday shift Garret had asked him to do or not. The extra money would be nice but after the last couple of weeks he felt like they were due a nice quiet weekend. He knew Lucy wouldn't mind though, she'd have just as much fun playing at the shop and chatting to Garret as she would do playing at home so he was just coming to the decision that he would do the shift when he walked straight into somebody. He stumbled back and lifted his head up to look at who it was and apologise only to see the blonde man from the school gates standing there. He quickly muttered sorry and attempted to walk around him and continue on his way to work but the blonde man wasn't on his own, a tall dark haired man had appeared in front of him. He wasn't the only one as when Edward turned to try and cross the road a woman with vibrant red curly hair was already crossing the street towards them and a third man, slightly shorter than the other two with a baseball cap pulled low over his face had stepped out from an alley way to his other side. With the blonde man now behind him they had effectively formed a circle, preventing him from moving anywhere.<p>

"What do you want?" he asked them, turning to face the blonde man again after giving up on trying to just walk out of whatever this was.

"Revenge." The man answered while taking a step towards him. Edward tried to move back but the rest of them had all moved in closer and there was nowhere for him to go.

"For what?" He could feel himself starting to panic. He knew he hadn't liked the look of the man when he'd seen him before, and the way he was staring at him now made his blood run cold. He could tell this wasn't going to end well for him and wondered what on earth he could have done to warrant everything that had been happening in his life the last couple of weeks.

"I think we'll let you work that out for yourself. It will be more fun that way." He answered taking another step forward. Edward automatically stepped back only to collide with the man behind him who grabbed hold of his arms and held them to his sides.

"I don't even know who you are." he responded while trying to struggle free of the man holding him but his grip only tightened.

"Oh you know." The blonde said with a smile that was full of malice. "I'm sure you'll remember eventually."

"Look, please tell me what I've done or what you want. I honestly don't know who you are." he pleaded, wanting to have at least a reason for what they were probably going to do to him. He didn't think that all that following of him was just for this conversation.

"I already told you, revenge."

The fist that collided with Edward's temple was strong and the only thing that kept him standing was the dark haired man's grip on his arms holding him in place. It dazed him and after another couple of punches to his face, one which burst his lip and another that bloodied his nose, the man holding him up let him fall after the powerful hit to his gut which doubled him over and left him slumped on the pavement. He was too disorientated from the hits to his head to even try and fight back as they kicked him. The only thing he could think to do was to curl his arms around his head to try and protect it. The blows finally stopped and he managed to focus his gaze on the blonde man who was now crouched over the top of him, his face close to his own as he smiled at him.

"This is only the beginning. Oh and I wouldn't bother telling anyone about this either, we wouldn't want to include that pretty little girl of yours in our game now would we?" He warned before he straightened up and walked away, his arm slung around the shoulders of the woman and the other two men joking and laughing behind them.


	14. Chapter 12 From Bad To Worse

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

Three cinema trips, two family birthdays, one dinner out, thirty six cupcakes in four different flavours, five or six drafts and half an hour trying to convince this site not to show it all in italics later... 

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><p><strong>Chapter 12 – From Bad To Worse<br>**

Edward stayed where he was, curled up on the pavement, until they were out of sight. Everything hurt and he wasn't sure what to do as he couldn't stay there but the walk home felt way too far. He was a lot closer to the shop but he didn't want anyone to see him like that, especially Garrett. He knew he'd ask questions he didn't have any answers for and he couldn't even risk telling him what he did know as he knew their parting threat was serious. Garrett probably wouldn't believe his excuses and he didn't think it was a good thing for his boss to know he was lying to him but there was nowhere else to go and at least it would save him having to think of a plausible reason for calling in sick on such short notice. He didn't like it, but the shop was the only place he could go so he pulled himself to his feet, wincing and nearly crying out at the pain it caused then had to remain still for a few moments as everything span around him and he tried not to pass out. The throbbing pain in his head doubled with his movement but he tried to ignore it as he began to stumble his way to work. As he moved he could feel where all the bruises would be appearing and each step sent a searing pain through his back. He could also feel the trickling of blood from his burst lip and the stronger flow from his nose, he was glad Lucy wouldn't see him until after he'd had chance to get cleaned up as he was pretty sure he must have looked terrifying at that moment. He felt worse than he had when he'd woken up in the alley way but then he hadn't even finished healing from that yet and now there were new bruises on top of the old ones. He wished he could figure out where he knew them from so he could work out what they wanted revenge for but he had no idea. All he had was that vague sense of familiarity that he'd had when he'd first seen the blonde man but he still couldn't place it. He wondered if they were the ones who had searched the flat as Lucy had said it was a woman and a man but he couldn't think why they'd have gone there. If there had only been the two of them at the flat, maybe the remaining two men were what had happened to him to leave him in that alley. None of it made sense though and the state his head was in wasn't making trying to figure it all out any easier, the pain was getting worse and beginning to make him feel sick. He was running out of energy and things had a strange sense of Déjà vu as he stumbled through the shop door and into unconsciousness. 

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><p>"What the hell happened to you?"<p>

Edward opened his eyes to see Garrett crouched down beside him looking incredibly worried. He tried to sit up but as he moved pain shot through him from everywhere - his back, arms, torso and head all filled with it. He managed to push himself up to be sitting but Garrett had to quickly put his hand on his back to stop him falling back as the pain in his head threatened to knock him out again.

"Edward, what happened?" Garrett asked again, beginning to get a bit impatient. It wasn't good to have employees in, in this state and he was worried about him. He was covered in blood and his eyes didn't seem to be focussing very well.

"I don't really know." he mumbled. Their warning was replaying strongly in his head, he couldn't tell anyone anything as he couldn't risk them hurting Lucy. Somehow he knew they'd know about it if he said something even if it was just to Garrett. It wasn't really a lie either considering he had no idea what he'd done to cause it.

"You really expect me to believe that?" Garrett asked in disbelief. Whatever had happened to him couldn't have occurred that long ago, the blood was still dripping from his nose and lip and he could see how disorientated he was. There was no way he couldn't know what had happened. Edward however just shook his head and groaned at the sensation that movement caused, he felt really sick.

"Fine then, if you don't want to tell me, don't, but if you're in some kind of trouble with someone maybe I could help." Garrett commented, concerned about him. Edward was a very quiet person, he kept to himself and all he really seemed to ever care about was his daughter. Garret couldn't see how he'd have gotten himself into this kind of trouble and the only thing he could think of was he'd borrowed money from someone and couldn't pay it back. People didn't just randomly beat others up without an explanation. There had to be a reason and surely Edward knew what it was. After working in the shop for so long Garrett was probably the closest he had to having a friend and he just wanted to help him but he couldn't do that if he didn't know what the problem was.

"We should take you to the hospital, make sure everything's ok." He added, he didn't like the fact Edward had passed out, he'd obviously got some kind of head injury with how unfocussed he seemed and he was worried he had a concussion. If he wouldn't let him help with what had caused the injuries, the least he could do was help fix them.

"No hospital, I'm ok." Edward answered. There was no way he could go to the hospital, they'd want to involve the police and he couldn't risk that. He'd much rather just go and get Lucy than spend the afternoon waiting to be treated anyway. He wanted to know she was safe and ok. The fact she was at school should have meant she was but he couldn't help wanting to see her to make sure after what had just happened. Garrett looked closely at him, trying to work out if what he was saying was the truth or if he was putting on a brave front but all he saw was panic in his eyes so he decided not to force the issue. He'd help him get cleaned up and if he didn't improve a little after that he'd call his cousin who worked as a doctor at the local ER whether Edward wanted him to or not.

"Look, we'll get you cleaned up a bit then I suggest you go home and rest. Take Lucy out of school early so you're not worrying about her." he suggested and Edward looked at him with a small grateful smile.

"Thank you."

With that, Garrett helped Edward up and through to the back where he found the shop's first aid kit and set to work. They managed to get the bleeding stopped and after making Edward sit still for a while he seemed to be able to focus better and as he didn't tell Garrett that he felt sick he let him leave the shop to go home after giving him some painkillers and making him promise to ring him if he needed anything. 

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><p>Lucy couldn't settle at school. She was meant to be doing sums but she couldn't concentrate on them. She was flicking her pencil against the desk and randomly looking around the classroom. She felt as if something wasn't quite right but she didn't know what. She knew her dad was at work so there was nothing not to be right but she still couldn't settle. She looked back to her sums and tried to do the next one but found herself looking up and to the door as someone knocked on it. She recognised the woman who came in as one of the office staff. They walked across to the teacher and Lucy watched them as the lady quietly told the teacher something. Lucy saw the teacher's eyes flick to her as the office lady turned and left and her feeling of something being not quite right grew. The feeling strengthened even more as the teacher came across to her then crouched down to be at her level. Lucy looked at her almost apprehensively, wondering what was going to be said.<p>

"Lucy, your dad rang and said he has to take you home early today, he'll be here in around ten minutes." the teacher told her and now the feeling of something being not quite right was replaced by one of worry. Why was her dad going to be picking her up early? It didn't make sense. She started to pack her stuff up so she'd be ready for when he arrived then sat fidgeting, thinking of all the reasons she could think of for why he would be taking her out of school. She couldn't think of many and those she could didn't really seem probable to her. With a couple of minutes left before her dad would arrive the teacher took Lucy to the main doors and stood with her to wait for him. They were stood there for hardly any time at all before Lucy saw him coming towards the school. From the way he was walking she could tell straight away that something was wrong with him and that he was in some kind of pain, it just wasn't his normal walk. She left the teacher and ran across to him and the teacher watched until she saw him pick Lucy up in a hug before she went back into the school.

As Lucy ran to Edward she saw that he was unhappy but trying to hide it. That added to the fact she could see traces of blood on his face and bruises forming confirmed for her that something was wrong with him. When she reached him he picked her up, hugging her close to his chest but she pulled her head away from his chest to look at him.

"Daddy you're hurt." she stated, looking him dead in the eye and he nodded.

"I know baby, we're going to go home now and spend the rest of the day together." he told her, trying his best to smile but failing miserably.

"Who hurt you?" Lucy asked, stroking away a tear that was escaping his eye showing the pain he was feeling.

"I don't know, I don't know who they are." he answered and she heard the desperation in his voice so rested her head back against his chest, hugging him tightly. He leant his head slightly and kissed the top of her head, glad to have her safe in his arms. He had to put her down then as everything was becoming too painful for him to be able to carry her but he held her hand tightly as they slowly started to walk home, Edward not being able to walk any quicker for pain. They finally got back to the flat and when they did he headed straight for the sofa where he sat down, leaning back against it, his eyes closed. Lucy followed and climbed up next to him.

"Daddy do you need help?" She asked quietly, thinking something might be wrong that he'd need her help to sort out. It was fairly obvious he was in pain and she'd helped him the last time he was hurt.

"I just need to sit quiet for a while, hurts a bit. Why don't you go and get your doll to play with." he answered her, opening his eyes slightly so he could look at her. He could see she thought he was worse than he was saying but she still did as he said. She disappeared to go and get her doll then when she came back she sat on the floor with it. Edward laid himself out on the sofa before painfully turning onto his side so he could watch Lucy. His eyes were heavy and he just felt like sleeping but he knew he probably shouldn't. It would just worry Lucy so he forced himself to stay awake by having a slightly mumbled conversation with her as she played.

Lucy played for a while and kept Edward's mumbled conversation going but she could easily tell he was tired. She thought he would probably be better if he did go to sleep for a bit so she sat her doll on the floor and left the living room. Edward didn't really realise she'd gone until he saw her come back in, carrying his pillow in front of her and dragging his quilt along behind her. He smiled slightly as she brought it to him and helped her pull it up onto the sofa. He took the pillow from her and placed it down where his head had been before pulling the quilt over himself. Lucy looked at him for a minute before getting onto the sofa too and crawling in under his quilt. He put his arms around her and she cuddled into him slightly, being careful not to hurt him. She wasn't tired but she wanted to be with him so was willing to stay still and let him fall asleep.

Once asleep, Edward stayed asleep. Lucy eventually got too bored to keep still so slid off the sofa and back onto the floor to play with her doll again. She played quite happily by herself for well over an hour but then she started to get hungry and restless so she went into the kitchen and pushed a chair across to the units to get to the biscuit jar as she didn't want to wake Edward yet. She got her biscuit then carefully got down from the chair and ate it as she wandered through to her room to find something else to play with. After pulling out a few jigsaws that were in the corner of her room she took them through to the living room where she sat down on the floor with them and pulled the lid off the first one. They were quickly forgotten as while she tipped the pieces out of the box she heard Edward moan and looked to the sofa to see him pushing the quilt away from himself in his sleep.

She got up and went across to him, looking at him closely. His face seemed troubled and he was thrashing around slightly. He was covered in a thin layer of sweat and on seeing that she gently touched his face to feel the heat radiating from it, he was hot...too hot.

"Daddy." she said gently, deciding he needed to be woken up. Something wasn't right and she wanted him to tell her what to do to help him. He didn't stir though except to kick his leg enough to make the quilt fall from the sofa completely.

"Daddy." she said a bit louder while prodding at his shoulder. This time he moaned again.

"Daddy wake up!" she said sternly and pushed his shoulder a bit harder, finally managing to stir him slightly.

"No...wanna sleep." he mumbled and Lucy could hardly make his words out they were so thick with sleep.

"No Daddy. Wake up. Please." she said while pushing his shoulder even harder. This time his eyes opened but fell shut again straight away.

"Daddy please wake up! What's wrong?" she asked urgently, wanting him to say something to her before he was asleep again but it was too late as he was already back deep asleep. With no help from her dad Lucy decided she'd have to do what she could on her own and as he was too hot he'd need cooling down so she went into the bathroom and got one of the flannels which she ran under the cold tap then took through to the living room. She stood in front of the sofa by Edward's head and carefully placed the damp cloth onto his forehead, remembering the times he had done that for her when she had felt unwell.

She sat on the floor and watched him sleeping for a long time, gradually getting more and more hungry. He never woke, instead he just whimpered in his sleep, thrashed around causing him to be close to falling off the sofa several times and he was just getting hotter. She kept taking the cloth and running it under cold water every time it got warm before placing it back on his forehead but it didn't seem to be doing much good. She didn't know what else she could do, she just wanted him to wake up.

She was starting to get really hungry by the time it reached dinner time. Edward still hadn't woken and she was incredibly worried about him now. She didn't know what to do, she wanted food as she was hungry but she couldn't wake Edward and she wanted to help him because he was ill but he wouldn't wake up to tell her how. She ended up just eating a few biscuits from the jar then sitting down by Edward again, always checking the cloth to make sure it was cool, hoping that by the morning he'd be better and he'd wake up.

She stayed sat on the floor all night, watching Edward. She started crying at one point, scared, but there was no one there to comfort her. She wanted Edward to wake up, be ok and give her hug. Unfortunately that didn't happen and Lucy eventually fell asleep, still sat on the floor by the sofa. 

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><p>Lucy woke up the next morning to find Edward just the same, if not worse. His temperature had definitely increased. As she went and cooled down the cloth again she knew she needed to get some help. It wasn't good for Edward to be like this. As she placed the cloth back onto his forehead she was trying to think of who she could go to for help. The only adults she really knew were Edward's boss, the other workers in the shop and Bella. They didn't really know any of their neighbours and the few times they had run into them in the hallway they'd usually been arguing amongst themselves so she didn't think she could go to them for help. She didn't know where Bella and Anna lived or if Anna would have been back at school to find Bella there and she knew that even if Bella had been there that morning she couldn't turn up at the school by herself. That would cause people to ask questions and she knew her dad hated that so she couldn't risk going there. The only option left was going to the shop but that was a long way away and she'd have to go alone. She knew she wasn't meant to go anywhere without Edward, he'd said it so many times but she guessed this might be an exception to the rule. He needed help and she couldn't think of anybody else. She was still torn though as she wanted to stay with him and was scared to go out on her own but he needed help. She looked at him for a few more minutes before gently kissing his cheek and running off to her room. She pulled her coat on and slid her feet into her shoes with the buckles on. Edward normally did them up for her but she did know how to do it which she was glad of now. Once she had them fastened she went back through and looked at Edward from the living room doorway. He was definitely ill and needed help. She was just going to have to go and get it. After finding Edward's keys in his jacket pocket she walked out into the corridor before reaching the door where she hesitated for a minute before opening it, unsure if she could actually do this. Her daddy needed help though and there was no one else to get it so with that thought she pulled open the door and stepped out. <p>

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><p>Lucy walked the whole way as quickly as she could. She was terrified, being out on her own like this. She had to go though, she needed to help her daddy and this was the only way. She knew exactly where she was going as she'd walked the journey with Edward hundreds of times but it still came as a great relief to her when the shop finally came into sight. She started running then and was soon opening the door and looking around for someone she recognised. She didn't see anyone near the shelves so walked through the shop and up to the counter where one of the workers was stood. She looked up at him and felt a wave of disappointment and hopelessness wash over her as she saw it was somebody she didn't know. They looked down at her, a look of shock crossing their face before they looked away from her and into the back of the shop.<p>

"Garrett!" they shouted as even though Lucy didn't know the man working in the shop he knew straight away that she was Edward's little girl and from what he knew of Edward, knew it wouldn't be right for her to be there when he wasn't, especially as it was a school day. After shouting out for Garrett to come through he watched Lucy, seeing how scared she looked but not knowing what to say to her without frightening her even more since she didn't know him. Garrett finally appeared behind him and he pointed to Lucy.

"Isn't she Edward's little girl?" he asked, and Garrett nodded as he looked at Lucy. She looked tired and close to tears, not the happy little girl he usually saw.

"Lucy what are you doing here and where's your dad?" he asked, crouching down to her height. She was so relieved to see somebody she knew that she rushed towards him for a hug.

"Daddy's ill, I can't get him to wake up and he's too hot. He's not right." She explained while Garrett accepted her hug.

"Did you come all this way by yourself?" he asked her and she nodded, a few tears leaking out and down her face. He was worried for Edward if Lucy had felt he was bad enough to come and get help on her own it had to be bad. He knew he should have made him see a doctor the day before.

"Daddy's ill, please come, he needs help." she cried as her tears burst through and she starting crying. Garrett tightened their hug and picked her up trying to comfort her.

"You'll be ok on your own for a while?" he asked the shop worker who nodded.

"Sure, looks like they need your help more than here does anyway." he answered, looking at the tearful Lucy.

"Ok, I'll be back later then." he said and with that he started to walk out of the shop, still holding Lucy and trying to calm her.

"You're going to have to tell me where you live, I've never been to your flat before." he told her as they stepped onto the street and Lucy nodded. He put her down but took hold of her hand which made her feel slightly less scared at being out without her daddy. Lucy lead him down the streets towards the flat building, tugging at his hand the whole time as she wanted to get back to her dad as quickly as she could. When they finally reached the flat building Lucy didn't give Garrett chance to look at the state it was in as she pulled him forwards into the building and up the stairs. Lucy took him up to their flat and handed Garrett the keys so he could open the door then lead him to the living room where Edward was laying on the sofa, obviously in a very unsettled sleep and sweating way too much to be healthy. Garrett could see why Lucy had thought it bad enough to leave the flat on her own.

"How long has he been like this Lucy?" he asked, crouching down to look closer at Edward. His face was flushed and the bruises had darkened a lot since he'd sent him on his way home. He was frowning in his sleep and Garrett hoped that was just from the fever and not nightmares, he seemed to have enough problems right now without them.

"Since yesterday lunch time." she answered, trying to peer around Garrett to see his face. He still looked terrible and she felt like crying again. "He will be ok won't he?"

"He'll be fine but I'm going to need to get him a doctor." Garrett answered, he was sure Edward wouldn't have approved but considering he wasn't in any state to argue Garrett was determined to do what was best for him although he'd need Lucy on his side. "Is that ok?"

Lucy looked at her dad a little unsure but after putting her hand on his forehead and feeling how warm he still was she nodded so Garrett pulled out his mobile and rang his cousin. He didn't know why Edward seemed to be so against going to the hospital but if it was the authorities getting involved that he was scared of they could easily keep it between the four of them this way. Luckily it turned out to be his cousin's day off, and after having explained the state Edward was in he promised to be there as soon as he could and told him to try and get Edward to drink some water as he was probably dehydrated and getting fluids into him would help bring the fever down. After putting his phone away he turned back to Lucy who was looking up at him with worried eyes.

"My cousin's a doctor and he's going to come around and have a look at your daddy. Until then we need to try and get him to drink something and keep him cool. Do you think you can help me with that?" he asked, hoping that if she had something to do she wouldn't worry so much. She nodded and Garret watched her as she moved to check the cloth she'd been trying to cool Edward down with before to find it was warm and dry. She seemed to know what she was doing so Garret left her to it as she lifted the cloth off his face and took it through to the bathroom while he went to find where they kept their glasses.

Lucy decided that this time Edward needed more than just a damp cloth on his forehead so found the small plastic bowl that was kept under the sink. After she checked it was clean as it's usual use was to stay by her bed when she was feeling sick, she took it across to the bath and sat it down under the taps. When there was enough cold water in it, but not too much to make it too heavy for her to carry she turned the tap off and dropped the cloth into the bowl. Then she lifted it up and walked slowly and carefully into the living room where she sat it down on the floor in front of the sofa. After squeezing out all the excess water from the cloth she moved closer to Edward and set about gently cleaning the sweat from his face, the cold cloth slightly cooling his hot skin.

Garrett glanced back into the living room after hearing her moving around again and was surprised to see she seemed to know exactly what to do to try and cool Edward down without him having to say a word. He was mesmerized by the love and care that such simple movements could show. He could see the concern all across Lucy's face as she cared for Edward. She was doing exactly the same thing for him that he would do for her if she was ill yet she was only five. He didn't want to interrupt her so he returned to exploring their kitchen and getting Edward some water.

Lucy heard Garrett come back in a couple of minutes later and paused with her movements leaving the cloth on Edward's forehead as she looked up to him.

"Let's see if we can get him to drink some of this." He said as he held up the glass of water. Lucy moved out of the way to let Garrett get in closer then took the glass from him as he knelt down and tried to wake Edward. He did stir a little but not enough so Garrett had to lift his shoulders up and prop him against the arm of the sofa before taking the glass back from Lucy and pressing it to Edward's lips. He groaned but opened his eyes a little so Garrett tipped the glass, letting the water trickle into his mouth slowly and luckily Edward was awake enough to swallow it. It took a while but eventually the glass was empty so Garrett let Edward slump back down onto the sofa and Lucy got to work again with the damp cloth as soon as Garrett stepped back.

Happy they'd done what they could for Edward until his cousin arrived, Garrett turned his attention to Lucy. She'd said that Edward had been ill since yesterday lunchtime which probably meant she hadn't had anything proper to eat since then. She must have been starving yet she hadn't even mentioned it, too concerned with how her dad was. Realising that, he left her in charge of trying to cool Edward down while he went back into the kitchen to make her something to eat.

He had just got Lucy settled with a sandwich and a glass of milk when someone knocked on the door. He got up from where he'd been sitting on the floor next to Lucy by the sofa to answer it and was relieved to see his cousin standing there.

Lucy looked up from her sandwich when she heard Garrett come in followed by a man who looked like the total opposite of him. Whereas Garret was broad shouldered and muscled with dark messy hair, brown eyes, a healthy covering of stubble and always wore band t-shirts and jeans the other man had bright blue eyes, neatly cut short blonde hair, perfectly smooth skin, a much leaner figure and was dressed in smart trousers and a button up shirt with a jacket slung over the top of his black leather bag.

"Lucy this is my cousin, Dr. Carlisle Cullen. Carlisle this is Lucy and Edward Masen." Garrett introduced them as Carlisle moved forward and knelt down on the floor beside her.

"Hello Lucy. Is this your daddy?" he asked with a very soothing, American accented voice and a friendly smile which made her take an instant liking to him so she nodded.

"Shall we see if I can help him?" he asked and she nodded again hoping that maybe Dr. Carlisle could make him wake up. Carlisle turned his attention to Edward, taking his temperature and checking his pulse rate while frowning at the bruises he could see covering his skin. Garret hadn't mentioned the bruises on the phone, just the fever. Edward looked like a very sickly individual, just at first glance he looked gaunt and underweight and the skin he could see that wasn't darkened by bruises was deathly pale apart from his cheeks which were red from the fever. Having seen the condition of where he was living and the state he was in Carlisle was surprised that the little girl looked perfectly healthy.

"Do you know how he got these bruises, they look pretty recent." he asked when he looked up from inspecting a particularly nasty looking one at his temple and saw Garrett standing on the other side of the sofa watching.

"He was beaten up yesterday morning on his way to work. He got through the door and collapsed. He refused to let me take him to the hospital so I helped him get cleaned up then sent him home to rest." Garrett answered. Carlisle nodded slightly and looked back to Edward before he started to check if he could feel any damage around his ribs and stomach.

"That hurt's." Edward grumbled feeling someone pressing down on his abdomen. His eyes didn't open immediately, but when it filtered through his sleep clogged mind that the hands pressing against his bruises were a lot larger than Lucy's his eyes shot open and he tried to push himself up to be sitting.

"Lucy?"

"I'm here Daddy." She answered, reaching up and taking hold of his hand. His attention moved to her and he was relieved to find she appeared to be ok although she did look a little upset. He then remembered what had woke him up and looked around to see Garrett and a man he didn't know staring at him.

"Who are you?" he asked, he never had visitors and he couldn't think why he'd have any now. No one other than Emmett and Garrett even had his address.

"Dr. Carlisle Cullen." he answered and Edward just looked even more confused so Garrett decided to explain for him.

"Lucy turned up in the shop this morning, saying you were ill and needed help. She brought me back here and I called Carlisle, he's my cousin." he explained and Edward immediately looked to Lucy, filling with worry. She'd been out on her own, that wasn't safe, anything could have happened to her. By now she'd climbed up onto the sofa to get her long awaited hug and without even realising it he was hugging her slightly too tightly but she wasn't complaining, just glad he was awake.

"She went to the shop by herself?" he questioned and both Garrett and Carlisle nodded.

"She couldn't wake you up and was scared. She needed to get you help. I'm guessing she couldn't think of anyone else to go to." Garrett answered and Edward looked back to Lucy who was now looking at him, hoping that he wasn't angry with her for going out on her own. She relaxed though when she saw him smile slightly.

"Thanks Luce." he mumbled and lightly kissed the top of her head. He couldn't be angry at her when it was his own fault. He was going to have to spend the afternoon making sure she knew how to use the phone and writing out the shop's and Garrett's numbers for her. He definitely didn't want her leaving the flat without him again for any reason.

"What's wrong with me then?" he asked. As his panic from initially waking up wore off he was starting to realise just how bad he was feeling and even with visitors in the flat he just wanted to close his eyes and sleep again.

"Well I don't think you've got any lasting damage from the beating you took, just cuts and bruises." Carlisle started before he looked to Edward's face and frowned slightly. There was something familiar about his eyes, they were a very unusual vivid green colour but it was one he was sure he'd seen before. He broke his gaze and focused back on trying to work out what was wrong with him.

"How long have you been feeling ill?"

"I don't know, I guess since yesterday lunch time." He mumbled trying to think when he'd started to feel so ill. He could remember coming home and feeling tired and sore but not a lot after Lucy had brought him his pillow and quilt.

"Ok, how do you feel now?" Carlisle asked. He could see the effort Edward was having to put into staying awake and had a pretty good idea what was wrong with him but needed to make sure.

"Tired."

"Are you nauseous? Any aches that aren't related to bruises?" Edward nodded to both, everything hurt and he was too groggy to try and distinguish why. The more Carlisle asked about symptoms the worse he felt. He'd alerted him to the fact that as well as feeling nauseous and sore his throat hurt, his headache had intensified, and he was cold even though Carlisle assured him he had a fever.

"Well I think all this is, is the flu. It's been going round the area lately and the beating probably just let it get a grip. I can give you something to hopefully reduce the symptoms but all we can do for the fever is make sure you get plenty of fluids." Carlisle concluded and with that he started to look through his case for the tablets he needed. He asked Garrett to fetch him a glass of water and then helped Edward to sit up properly while Lucy moved to be curled into his side.

Garrett returned with the refilled glass and as Edward took the pills Carlisle studied him and Lucy. She had the same eyes as her father and although he was positive he had never met either of them before it was like he already knew them. He wondered if he'd maybe treated one of them at the hospital before but he was almost certain that wasn't it.

"Now all you need is plenty of rest and make sure you try to eat something." He commented when the pills had been swallowed. Being underweight wouldn't help his immune system fight off the virus and if he was feeling nauseous Carlisle knew he was unlikely to remember to eat but the last thing he needed was to lose any weight.

"Ok." Edward agreed, the thought of eating made him want to be sick but as he just wanted everyone to leave he didn't mention that. He felt awkward having people in his flat and all he wanted to do was get Lucy fed then watch TV with her and have an early night. Seeing that Carlisle was now packing up his bag, Edward turned his attention to Garrett who was still watching them all.

"Thanks for coming back with Lucy." he said, he really was grateful for that. He didn't want to even think about what could have happened to her outside on her own.

"No need to thank me. I made her a sandwich...with you being asleep she hadn't been able to get any food. Do you want me to do anything else? I can stay for a bit if you want." He didn't want to leave them on their own, it was easy to see how bad Edward was feeling and he knew he'd be better off in bed resting while someone else took care of Lucy for a while. He also knew how unlikely it would be for Edward to accept that kind of help.

"Thanks but we'll be ok, you can get back to the shop." Edward replied proving Garrett right and making Carlisle glance up at him with a frown again. Garrett caught his cousin's gaze and could see how little he thought of them being on their own.

"You sure? I really don't mind staying." Garrett tried again.

"Yeah, me and Luce are better on our own." Edward answered but Garrett really doubted that and wondered if there was anyone else he'd rather have stay, he didn't mind who it was, he just didn't want to leave them on their own.

"Is there anyone else you can call to come round? You could do with being looked after yourself never mind Lucy." he said and Edward shook his head.

"We'll be fine, the shop will be needing you." Edward replied, he didn't want people intruding on his life with Lucy. It was always just them and that was what he was used to. Things got upset and complicated when other people arrived in it. He had never been the best of patients when ill anyway. He just wanted them to leave him alone.

"Ok, but if you do need someone to come and help you, ring the shop and I'll come back over." Garrett offered.

"Ok, thanks" he answered figuring that arguing that was pointless as agreeing didn't mean he actually had to ring him and the less he argued the faster they'd leave. He wasn't feeling well enough to attempt being at all social.

"I guess we better get going then." Garrett commented uneasily and when Edward didn't say anything other than thank you again he reluctantly left along with Carlisle after making sure Edward had Carlisle's number in case he started to feel worse. 

* * *

><p>"They really shouldn't be on their own." Carlisle commented as they went down the stairs. It didn't feel right leaving them there.<p>

"He's very independent. You saw how against accepting help he was." Garrett replied. He didn't like it either but they'd done all they could bar refusing to leave and he didn't really think upsetting him would have helped.

"Does he not have any family that we could have called, even if it was just to check up on him a few times? He's going to be feeling pretty rough and exhausted for the next few days and I get the impression that he doesn't really take good care of himself anyway."

"Not as far as I know. He's never mentioned any to me and the only emergency contact number he's ever given me was for Lucy's school. What do you mean?"

"I can't be sure without weighing and measuring his height but he looks underweight and does he turn up covered in bruises a lot?"

"I guess he has been looking a little scrawny the last couple of weeks. Something's been stressing him out but he won't tell me about it and the bruises only started appearing last week, the other weekend he said he got mugged." Carlisle caught the worry on Garrett's face.

"You think he's in trouble don't you?" he asked, it was obvious Garrett cared about Edward and Lucy although he got the impression it would be hard not to if you knew them. Lucy looked like a very sweet little girl.

"He's a good kid, he puts everything into caring for Lucy and he's not the type to get into fights. I don't know what's going on but maybe I should give him a pay rise, see if it helps." He thought aloud, if it was money issues then maybe a pay rise would be a way to help without him realising and refusing it. Carlisle just nodded at that thinking that a pay rise wouldn't go amiss anyway with the state of the building they lived in. He really hoped they'd be ok left on their own, he knew he wouldn't be able to get their faces out of his head until he knew they were both well. Hopefully Garrett would be checking up on them and would let him know how they were doing. As they'd reached the main doors he was thinking about what Garrett had said of them having no family. He was too young to be out all on his own with a child Lucy's age and he found it hard to believe there wasn't somebody somewhere for support but it did explain why they were living where they were and why he didn't seem to have been taking care of himself. It wasn't right and he wished there was something they could do to help them but if he wouldn't accept help from Garrett there was no way he'd take it from him. No one should be left without a family, he could just imagine what his wife would say if he told her about Lucy and her dad and it was then that he suddenly realised where he'd seen the same green eyes as the matching pairs upstairs before.

"What did you say their surname was?" He questioned Garrett. He was sure he'd already told him but he'd been paying more attention to Edward and Lucy than what Garrett had been saying at the time.

"Masen, why?" He responded when Carlisle frowned slightly at the name.

"Nothing." He muttered, it had to just be a coincidence, still, he'd check with his wife when he got home to make sure. If it wasn't just a coincidence somebody somewhere had a lot of explaining to do.


	15. Chapter 13 Friends?

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 13 – Friends?<strong>

After Garret and Carlisle left Lucy climbed back onto Edward's lap and snuggled into his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head before resting his check against it.

"I'm so sorry Luce." He mumbled into her hair.

"It's not your fault." She responded, she didn't care about how scared she'd been now that he was awake a cuddling her. None of that mattered, he looked after her and she looked after him, it was what they did and even if she had to do things that terrified her she'd still happily do them for her daddy. It wasn't his fault he'd got hurt and ill.

"You're the best little girl a dad could ever have and I love you so much." He hated the fact she'd had to spend an entire night effectively on her own and worried about him and then had to go out on her own just to get him help. She shouldn't have had to do that and with that thought he decided now was as good a time as any to make sure she knew how to use the phone so she wouldn't ever have to do it again. He may not have liked having to accept help from Garrett and Carlisle but he didn't want to put Lucy in that position again. He shifted slightly to sit up again and Lucy shuffled herself even closer into his chest not wanting him to stop hugging her yet.

"I love you too Daddy." He kissed her head again in response before trying to spot the phone.

"Lucy have you seen the phone?" he asked her, not being able to see it anywhere and she shook her head. "Can you see if you can find it? I need to teach you how to use it so you won't have to go out on your own again. Get my mobile out of my jacket pocket as well."

Lucy nodded and hugged him tighter for a moment before she slid off his lap and went in search of the phones. She found the landline handset sitting on the kitchen table then went through to the hallway to get his mobile out. Once she'd collected them both she joined Edward on the sofa again and he showed her how to turn the phones on and enter the numbers. He made her practice by getting her to phone his mobile from the landline and vice versa and when he was convinced she'd got which buttons she needed to press to make a call and end one memorised he showed her how to work the address book on his mobile making sure she knew which contacts were Garrett and the shop's main line. He also entered Carlisle's number into his phone so she'd be able to find that as well before showing her the note Garrett had left with their numbers on and telling her to but it next to the landlines base which sat next to the TV so it would be easy to find if she needed it.

Once that was all done Lucy was getting hungry again so they got up to move through to the kitchen with Lucy watching Edward anxiously. She could see in his face how much pain it was causing him just to stand and the movement seemed to be making him dizzy. What little colour had been in his face drained as he stood and she saw him clutch at his stomach while wincing as he headed for the kitchen.

Lucy sat down in her usual spot at the kitchen table and watched him moving awkwardly round the kitchen making her beans on toast. He made none for himself and once it was cooked he handed Lucy her plate then slumped down into a chair, his head resting on his arms that lay crossed on the table. Lucy said nothing but his lack of food didn't go unnoticed as she ate her lunch. Edward didn't move an inch the whole time she ate, he felt exhausted and the smell of Lucy's lunch was just making him feel even more nauseous than he already was, there was no way he could follow Carlisle's instructions to eat. He just wanted to sleep but he also wanted to stay awake for Lucy. When she'd finished eating she got out of her chair, went across to Edward and ran her hand through his hair to get his attention, causing him to look at her and try to smile. He failed as it looked more like a pained grimace and Lucy just started to look worried again. He looked tired and like the pain was beginning to get the better of him once more.

"Go to bed." she told him sternly and he looked slightly shocked for a moment at her telling him to do something in that way but that passed as he nodded. He knew he couldn't fight sleep for much longer.

"Yeah, you're right...I need my bed. If I go to sleep for a bit though you have to stay in the flat ok and not mess with anything in the kitchen." he answered her and she nodded.

"Go." she said so he slowly stood up, holding onto the table top for support.

"Wake me up when you want food." he told her and she nodded again.

"I will. Go." she replied and gently pushed him towards the door. He turned to look at her and laughed slightly at the expression on her face as she stood there with her arms crossed staring at him.

"Ok, Ok I'm going." he relented and she smiled slightly then followed him through to his room to make sure he got into his bed and went to sleep. She sat beside him on the bed, waiting until his eyes fell shut and when they did she stayed where she was for a bit longer before leaning down and lightly kissing his cheek. She then slid of his bed and went to get some toys that she took back through to his room so she could still be sat with him so she'd know if he was ok or not. She had heard Garret say he needed looking after so she was going to do it herself.

As he slept she kept checking his temperature by placing her hand on his forehead and was glad when she found he wasn't as hot as he had been. He wasn't sweating so much either but he was still warmer than normal so she knew he would still feel ill when he woke up. When she got bored of playing she decided to take a nap as well as after the stress of the previous night and morning she was starting to feel tired so she curled up beside Edward and fell asleep.

A couple of hours later Lucy woke up to find she was really hungry to the point where her stomach was starting to hurt so she had to wake her dad. He woke up slowly, the fever making him feel groggy but she was relieved he was stirring at all. As soon as he managed to pull his heavy eyes open he saw Lucy and tried to smile. Even though it was only faint Lucy still caught it and smiled back to him.

"I think it might be time to take some of those pills the doctor left." Edward mumbled as he pushed himself up to be sitting. Lucy was gone from his bed straight away and Edward looked around a bit confused as he saw his room empty except for him. He was going to get up to go and find her but his head was thumping rather painfully and he was sure that if he got up at the moment he would probably fall straight back down due to dizziness. Five minutes later though and Lucy came back through his bedroom door and to his bed carrying a glass of water and the bottle of pills. She carefully put the glass down on Edward's bedside table then climbed up onto his bed and gave him the pills.

"Thanks Lucy." he said as he smiled to her and tried to get the top off the bottle. Lucy smiled back and settled down sat next to him. She was hungry and wanted her dinner but she was determined to wait patiently for Edward to be ready to get up. He reached across her to get his water and took a large sip from the glass before swallowing two of the pills and drinking some more of the water. Once he was sure the pills had gone down ok he sat the glass back down and pulled Lucy into a hug, kissing the top of her head lightly.

"Suppose you're wanting your dinner aren't you?" he asked her and she pulled herself away from his chest to nod. "Come on then." and with that he let go of her and she slid off the bed then waited for him to get up. He managed to get himself out of the bed and standing but it took a few minutes before he felt steady enough to walk. He would have preferred to stay in bed but he had to look after Lucy and she needed food.

They went through to the kitchen and Edward set about cooking Lucy dinner with her trying to help him. She was more of a hindrance really as she kept getting in his way but he couldn't tell her to sit down and leave him to it as he knew she was only doing it to try and help him. He didn't have the heart to tell her she was only making things harder. He finally got her burger and chips cooked and placed on the table in front of her. He hadn't made anything for himself as he was still feeling sick. Instead of eating he just got himself another glass of water then sat down and watched Lucy while taking small sips from his glass and hoping the pills would kick in soon.

After Lucy had eaten her dinner she tried to convince Edward to go back to bed but he wouldn't as he didn't want her to be on her own again. He wanted her to be able to talk to him or just sit with him knowing that he was still awake and looking after her. It was the second option that she went for, leaving them sat on the sofa watching TV. Edward started to feel a tiny bit better after the pills effect started to work. The thumping in his head lessened and he felt a bit more awake which he was glad about. As they watched TV he was thinking about the following day. He'd have to take Lucy to school and pick her up again but he was scared of leaving the flat. He didn't want to get caught by the blonde man and his friends again when he was already not feeling a hundred percent. He'd stand no chance against them and if Lucy was with him he didn't know what he'd do. He wouldn't be able to fight to protect her if they tried to do something as he just wasn't strong enough. He couldn't keep her off school though as if he did the school would start to ask questions and questions were never good. He had to get her to school, he'd just have to hope they didn't meet any trouble on their way or at least if he did Lucy would already be in school.

Edward started to get tired again quite early and he began to have to battle to keep his eyelids open. He gave in just before Lucy's normal bed time as an early night would be good for her as well after her staying awake scared the previous night. He told Lucy it was bedtime and she didn't argue. Instead she just got off the sofa and waited for him to stand up. When he did she went through to her room to start getting ready while he dragged himself into the kitchen to get her, her normal milk and biscuit. He took it through to her room and sat down on her bed as he watched her pulling her pyjamas on. When she was done she smiled to him and went across to her bed where she climbed up onto his knee and took her milk and biscuit from him. He wrapped one arm loosely around her and stroked her hair back from her face with the other as she drank her milk. He was virtually asleep himself now and was getting to the stage where he was very reluctant to move once sat down. He had to though as she finished her supper and ran off to the bathroom to brush her teeth. He stood up from her bed when she returned and got into it so he could tuck her in, then said goodnight and kissed her forehead before turning the light out and leaving the room quietly. When he reached his room he fell onto his bed and managed to pull off his trousers to leave him in just his boxers and t-shirt before his exhaustion got the better of him and he was all but unconscious splayed out across his bed, the quilt only half covering him as sleep claimed him before he could pull it up.

Edward woke as normal from the ringing of his alarm the next morning but he was even less inclined to move than usual. He reached out to his bedside table to hit the alarm off then forced himself to sit up. The pills and half empty glass of water were still on his bedside table from yesterday so he picked them up and took two of them hoping they'd help him wake up a bit and make him be a bit more willing to move.

Once showered and dressed he looked in the mirror on his way out of the bathroom and found he looked exactly how he felt - awful. He'd always hated having any kind of illness as his body never seemed able to fight them off and they always ran him right down. This flu was no different and he guessed he'd be stuck with it for a while as he'd need complete rest to rid himself of it completely and that just wasn't possible with a five year old to look after.

After a few minutes of staring at his pale face in the mirror he went through to the kitchen to make himself a much needed cup of coffee and to get Lucy's milk for when he woke her up. The coffee made him feel slightly more awake and with the pills beginning to work he felt a little bit better. He picked up Lucy's milk and went to her room to wake her. When he turned on the light he heard her grumble slightly and her covers move so he knew she was already partly awake. He sat the glass of milk down on her little table then walked across to her bed and looked down at the curled up lump under the covers and smiled.

"Come on Luce, it's time to get up." he said as he pulled the cover off her. He watched her uncurl then sit up to look at him and saw the concern flash through her eyes. He smiled slightly to try and get her not to worry about him and she held her arms out for a hug. Edward leant down, hugged her tightly for a couple of minutes before letting go of her again and she started to move then to get up and dressed. Edward decided to leave her to it and went back to the kitchen to get her breakfast ready.

Lucy came through to the kitchen a few minutes later dressed but sleepy. She shuffled across to her chair and plonked herself down in it. Edward turned from where he was stood at the units to look at her. She was sat leant on the table with her eyes half closed and her head almost touching the table. He smiled slightly again, the familiar feeling of love for her flooding through him. He moved across and sat a bowl of cereal in front of her before ruffling her hair slightly making her lift her head up and open her eyes to look at him annoyed. She couldn't stay annoyed with him though when she looked at him and saw how ill and tired he still looked. Her face softened into a small smile and she looked back to the table and at her cereal. She toyed with it for a couple of minutes before she realised Edward was still watching her so she began to eat it.

Half an hour later and they were walking down the street to Lucy's school. Edward was holding Lucy's hand tightly and she was quite happy to be with him this time and not on her own. Edward was feeling distinctly nervous as they walked, continually looking around them for the men he was sure were following them even if he couldn't see them. They finally got to the school a couple of minutes late as they'd been walking slower than usual and Edward said bye to Lucy and watched as she went into the school building. He then looked around to see if he could see the eyes he could feel watching him but there was no sign of them. Deciding it was best to get moving again he headed off in the direction of the shop, intending on saying thanks to Garrett again and to find out about shifts. After that he was going to go back home and curl up in bed for the rest of the day until he had to pick Lucy up.

He made it to the shop unscathed but jumpy and walked in catching the attention of Garrett straight away who was currently stood behind the counter checking the till.

"Edward what on earth are you doing here?" he asked, coming out from behind the counter to talk to him. He hadn't expected to see him for the rest of the week and was surprised to see him there although he was relieved that he must have felt well enough to be up and about even if he did look awful.

"Came to find out about shifts. I can do the Saturday shift so long as Lucy can stay in the back as usual." Edward answered.

"You're still ill Edward, you'd be better off at home and in bed." he replied, Carlisle would kill him if he let Edward work before he was better, he'd made him promise to ring him with updates on how he was and to take him straight to him if he ever turned up hurt again. He'd been slightly surprised at how concerned Carlisle had been about him but then his cousin had always seen being a doctor as more than just a job so it wasn't too out of the ordinary.

"I had to take Lucy to school anyway so I thought I might as well come here while I'm out. I'm planning on staying in bed the rest of the day." Edward defended himself and Garret smiled slightly, glad to hear he had some sense.

"Good. If you're feeling better by Saturday then I'll put you down for the shift and of course Lucy can come. She cheers the place up. " Garret told him and Edward smiled gratefully.

"Thanks, we'll see you then." he said, he was pretty sure he'd be ok to work by then and he didn't want to take advantage of Garrett by staying off work too long.

"Remember if you need help with Lucy or anything ring the shop. Now go home and get some rest."

"You sound like Lucy you know." Edward muttered and Garret laughed.

"She's a bright kid." Garret shrugged and Edward smiled.

"Yeah she is. I better had be getting back home really." he said as he moved towards the door.

"See you on Saturday." Garret called and with that Edward was gone and on his way back home.

As he walked the feeling of being watched got worse so his pace quickened. He couldn't tell if anyone was actually there or if it was just paranoia but either way he didn't like it. He'd reached the park after deciding to go a different way home in the hope that if they were around he'd have lost them. He felt calmer as he walked into the park after convincing himself he wasn't being followed any more but with being calm he also felt tired - he'd been walking too quickly for being ill. When he came to a bench he decided to sit down for a minute and rest before walking the last few streets home. He'd been sat there for a few minutes before he heard someone else enter the park and looked up to see the red headed woman and the blonde haired man near the entrance talking. After sitting frozen for a couple of seconds he jumped up and started to run. He didn't want to be spotted or caught by them again, especially not now so he ran. He didn't stop running either until he was collapsed against his locked door, breathing heavily trying to get his breath back. He sat on the floor, leant against the door, staring straight down his corridor before he tipped his head back to rest against the door and closed his eyes tightly. He couldn't live in fear like this, Lucy would pick up on it soon and he didn't want her to be scared.

He pulled himself up off the floor and through to his room after his breathing returned to normal and the coughing fit it seemed to have triggered had ended. He crawled straight into his bed, curled up with the covers tightly wrapped around him and fell fast asleep.

He tossed and turned, muttering and whimpering as they chased him through black streets, Lucy crying out for him all the time, her voice scared and laced with tears but he couldn't reach her. He ran from them and called out for Lucy, her cries responding, crying for him and then her scream, filled with terror and pain echoed through the streets. They stopped chasing him and he listened to Lucy's scream, looking around for her frantically before sinking to his knees and crying out himself. Crying out for Lucy and joining her in her pain. With their screams echoing through his head he woke up with a jerk to find himself covered in cold sweat and trembling, the screams still ringing in his head. He never wanted to hear Lucy scream like that, ever.

He lay awake for a while after that, not being able to make himself fall back to sleep for fear of hearing Lucy scream again. He had managed to convince himself that it was his fever making him have the dream along with his fear of the blonde and his friends and that it would never come true but he still couldn't make himself go back to sleep. He ached from having run and his eye lids were unbearably heavy making them painful to keep open, his body was screaming for sleep but he couldn't let himself for the risk of having that dream again. 

* * *

><p>Lucy stood outside school waiting for Edward. Most of the other children had gone home already but Edward hadn't arrived yet. Lucy wasn't on her own though as Anna had persuaded her sister to let them wait until Edward came so Lucy wouldn't be on her own although it hadn't taken very much pleading at all to get her to agree. Lucy was worrying about Edward, he was never late. He always made sure he was there and waiting for her when the bell rang. As they waited even longer and Edward still couldn't be seen coming down the street Lucy started to get upset.<p>

"Lucy calm down, he'll be here soon and we can stay until he gets here." Bella said as she crouched down to be level with Lucy.

"He's never late." Lucy replied and turned back to look down the street, "He's never late." she repeated before tears started to form and fall. Bella tried to get her to calm down but she wouldn't turn from looking down the street for Edward and she just got more upset with every minute he didn't appear. Anna was also starting to get upset because of Lucy's behaviour; she'd never seen Lucy act like that before.

"Lucy he'll be here ok, and if he doesn't come soon then we'll take you home, I'm sure he'll be there, he'll have just got caught up in something." Bella tried again to calm her down but Lucy shook her head, nobody could tell her what Edward would be doing or where he was...she knew him best and she knew that he would never be late and would never leave her on her own like this.

Bella was starting to panic slightly herself. It was now half an hour after the end of school and she'd always see him standing outside the gates early waiting for Lucy. She knew as much as Lucy did this wasn't right and she couldn't think of a way to calm the distraught Lucy down. She was about to give up on waiting and just walk her home herself when she looked up to see the figure she recognised to be Edward walking quickly towards them. She watched him as he got closer and noted how pale and tired he looked along with the fact he was covered in fresh bruises and obviously hadn't bothered with sorting his hair out that day as it was sticking up in all directions. He reached them and immediately scooped Lucy up into a tight hug, whispering into her hair that he was sorry and he hadn't meant to be late but had fallen asleep. Bella saw the instant affect he had on her...as soon as he had picked her up she began to calm down.

Edward had woken up after falling back to sleep and having the same dream to find he was late for picking Lucy up. He was still feeling incredibly tired, ill and achy so no matter how quickly he had tried to get there he still found himself half an hour late for picking her up. He had panicked the whole way to the school, thinking anything could have happened to her and was incredibly relieved to see her but it wasn't until he was hugging her tightly too himself and telling her he was sorry over and over again as she cried that he began to finally calm down and realise the other people stood with them. He looked up from Lucy's hair to see Anna and Bella stood watching them.

"Thank you so much for waiting with her." he said to them, looking directly to Bella. He was really grateful to them for staying with Lucy, at least she had been safe and not on her own as he'd been imagining.

"It's ok, you did it for Anna and Lucy got really upset over you not being here. I couldn't really leave her to wait by herself." She replied and smiled slightly. "Are you ok? You look terrible." she added.

"I'm fine, it's just the flu. I didn't mean to be late, I fell asleep. I tried to get here but I couldn't help it." Edward garbled quickly, wanting to give some excuse so that she wouldn't think he had intentionally left Lucy, he wanted nobody to ever think that of him.

"Hey it's ok, no need to explain." She responded, shocked at just how panicked he seemed. Everyone was late every once in a while, it wasn't a big deal and she really hadn't minded waiting with Lucy. It was obvious how bad he was feeling from his appearance and she was surprised he hadn't sent somebody else to pick her up for him so he could rest but then she realised she'd never actually seen anyone other than Edward take Lucy to school and she wondered if that meant they were on their own.

"Thanks again anyway." Edward said, Lucy had finally stopped crying and Bella watched the pair of them together. If they were on their own and Edward was ill he had to be having a hard time with Lucy. She felt really bad for him, it was probably her fault he'd even got the flu considering she'd probably passed it on to him from Anna in the car ride at the weekend.

"Listen, why don't you and Lucy come round for dinner? I can drive you home later, you look like you could do with a break and I'm sure the girls would love to play." She suggested, Renee wasn't going to be home till late as she had a meeting after school and Lucy being over would keep Anna occupied. It would also give her a chance to try and get to know Edward better and he really looked like he needed looking after for a night. It wasn't just the illness, even though his initial panic at being late seemed to have calmed down there was still something lurking in his eyes that called out to her. She wanted to help even though she had no idea what it was that was wrong.

Edward knew he couldn't say no. He'd been doing a horrible job of looking after Lucy the last couple of days and he knew how much she'd been wanting to go to Anna's house, it would be a good start to making it all up to her. He could already see just the offer from Bella had chased off the last of her tears and replaced them with a small hopeful smile as she looked up at him.

"What do you say Luce? You want to go?" he asked just to make sure and she nodded so he put her down and she ran over to Anna and happily started chatting to her.

"Thank you, Lucy could do with having some fun." He said to Bella as she smiled at him.

"Anything to get Anna out from under my feet." She commented and he smiled at that a little. They all started walking, the girls running a little ahead of Edward and Bella but Edward's gaze remained fixed on Lucy and he seemed nervous and jumpy as they walked.

"I'm guessing your weekend didn't get any better." Bella commented after they'd been walking in silence for a few minutes. She knew he didn't seem to like questions but he had agreed to spend the afternoon at their house so they were going to have to find something to talk about or have a very awkward few hours.

"The weekend did." He answered thinking of the fun they'd managed to have on Sunday, he just wished the rest of the week hadn't happened.

"Oh that's good, get up to anything fun?"

"Just played with Lucy. How about you?" he asked figuring if she could ask him questions it was only fair if he asked some too plus is might distract him from his paranoia which had returned. 

"Nothing exciting, college work and keeping an eye on Anna mostly." She responded. That made him wonder why Bella seemed to be left with Anna so much, it sounded like she spent more time with her than their mother did which seemed odd when Bella had said she was a primary school teacher. It made the idea of talking to her easier though as at least she had some idea of what it took to look after a child. Most people their age had no idea, nor did they want to and he'd never had any interest it trying to befriend anyone like that. He didn't have chance to ask any more questions as they were nearing a road and the girls were still several steps ahead of them.

"Lucy come back here." He called and she obediently ran back to him and reached out for his hand. She held onto it tightly and glanced to Anna who was walking beside Bella now and talking to her, telling her about school. Seeing she was busy she looked back to her dad and stared at his hair. He didn't usually wear it that messy.

"Did you have nightmares?" She asked Edward and he looked to her wondering how on earth she picked up on these kind of things so well. She was way too perceptive sometimes.

"What makes you ask that?" he wondered hoping to distract her. She was meant to be having fun with Anna, not worrying about him.

"Your hair's all messy." Lucy replied and Edward laughed slightly.

"I knew there was something I forgot to do." he said while reaching up to run his hand through his hair hoping it would flatten it slightly but when Lucy giggled he figured it was probably a lost cause. His plan to distract her seemed to work as she didn't ask about nightmares again and instead she filled him in on her day at school.

Bella had been watching Edward as he talked to Lucy and had caught the look in his eyes when Lucy had asked about nightmares. He'd effectively distracted his daughter but Bella could see Lucy had been right and wondered what they were about. She just seemed to be coming up with more and more questions she wanted answers too each time she saw him. As she watched them talking she could see there was a bond between them that she had never seen with anyone else. It was quite obvious that even though Lucy was only five they could read and understand each other perfectly. They were talking so happily to each other, Edward talking to her the same as he would any adult. Lucy seemed so much older than five as well. They were just so happy to be with each other. Edward wasn't annoyed by her and Lucy wasn't continually whining for something like most other parents and children would be. Lucy and Edward were just different and Bella was curious to know why.

They reached Bella and Anna's house and Bella let them all in, the two girls running in ahead of her and Edward.

"Mum won't be back for another couple of hours or so." she said as she led Edward through to the kitchen, Anna and Lucy were already in the living room, Anna showing Lucy one of her toys. Edward just nodded to Bella words, distracted by their house. It was large and well looked after but it looked lived in unlike the show home his parent's owned. He felt slightly out of place as it was nothing like his flat, there was no damp here, no peeling wall paper, no cracked tiles. The kitchen that they were sat in was large and full of expensive appliances and accessories but there were toys laying around, kids drawings attached to the fridge and random clutter on the units. It looked like a home, and he found he kind of liked it. It was sort of like Bella, they made him uncomfortable but at the same time put him at ease. He didn't understand it but he didn't mind being there.

"Would you like a drink?" Bella's question shook him out of his thoughts and he looked to her and nodded.

"That would be great, thanks." His throat had been bothering him, the coughing fit from earlier seemed to be setting in for the long run and his throat was sore and tickly so a drink would definitely be appreciated. Bella headed for the kettle after checking he liked tea then leant against the units facing him as she waited for it to boil. He'd taken a seat at the kitchen table and he looked relieved to be sitting down.

"You're really not feeling well are you?" she asked and he just shook his head. He'd only just realised that in his hurry to leave the flat he'd forgotten to take the pills Carlisle had left and he was really starting to regret that.

"Illnesses always run me down." He explained and she just frowned slightly before turning around and rummaging through a cupboard. He couldn't see what she was doing but when the kettle had boiled and she'd finished making their drinks she sat down across from him and passed him a mug of something bright yellow with a strong lemon scent.

"Lemsip." She explained and she smiled as he took a sip.

"Thanks." He mumbled, he doubted it would work as well as his pills but it would probably make him feel a little better until they went home and it was nice for her to have thought of it.

"Least I could do considering you probably caught it from Anna through me anyway."

"I think Lucy probably did that to be honest, she wasn't feeling great on Friday night but she fought it off." He commented while looking around the kitchen again. There was a photo pinned to an overflowing notice board beside the fridge that showed Bella and Anna with Renee and a man who looked a little younger than her but he was smiling and holding a giggling Anna in his arms, they looked like a happy family. Bella noticed where he was looking and smiled, remembering when the picture was taken.

"That's Phil, Anna's dad." She explained and he glanced to her hoping she'd explain more.

"Just Anna's?" he asked when she didn't say anything else straight away and she nodded. 

"Yeah, my dad died when I was ten. He was a police officer, shot on duty. Mum met Phil when I was twelve and they got married a year later. He's a good man, makes Mum happy when he's here and he's good with Anna." She elaborated, she didn't really mind talking about it and she realised it would give her a good excuse to ask him some of the things she was curious about.

"Where is he?" he wondered aloud, she'd never mentioned him before, it was always just Renee when they'd been talking about the girls plans to play outside of school.

"He travels a lot for work, Mum used to go with him with Anna but when she started school that wasn't really possible." She answered and he wanted to ask what he did but he didn't want to appear too nosey so he didn't.

"What about you? Do you still live at home or is it just you and Lucy?" she asked and although he'd guessed she'd probably get around to asking that with the direction their conversation had ended up going he still didn't like it, but that wasn't her fault and after she'd answered his questions it was only fair he did the same.

"No, It's just me and Lucy." he answered and Bella smiled at actually getting an answer from him. He didn't really look happy but it had confirmed her earlier suspicions about them being on their own.

"I'd love to move out, but Mum still needs help with Anna and it's handy for college staying here." she said and Edward just nodded. He'd love to still be at home but he wondered if he'd think like Bella if he actually did still live there.

"What do you do at college?" he asked not wanting to have to answer any more questions about his family. He really didn't want to think about them and he was curious about Bella so he tried to distract himself.

"I'm studying to be an English teacher. You said you were a shop assistant right?"

"Yeah, at the music shop a few streets away from the girls' school."

"Oh I think I know the one you mean, Garrett's? How long have you been working there?" she asked. She'd visited the shop a couple of times and it had a very good reputation, most people in the area knew it.

"A couple of years. I like it there." he replied and she smiled.

"Sounds cool." she said and then they fell into silence. Edward contented himself with sipping his drink and trying to ignore the fact Bella was studying him. He could feel her eyes on his face and assumed it was the bruises she was staring at. He knew they looked bad.

"I hope you don't mind me asking...but...how did you get all those bruises?" she asked hesitantly as he lifted his gaze to her. He just shrugged, there was nothing he could say to answer that one and she frowned at him but didn't comment further and they fell into another awkward silence so Edward looked around again and this time his eyes fell on Lucy and Anna who were stood in the doorway looking at them.

"Can we have a drink?" Anna asked noticing they had Edward's attention and Bella leapt up from her seat.

"Sure. You want biscuits too?" she asked and Anna nodded and smiled. Bella returned her smile and set about making them drinks. Lucy had gone across to Edward and was now happily sat on his knee with one of his arms loosely around her. Anna also went across but she climbed into one of the empty seats around the table and watched Bella.

"When's Mummy back?" she asked and Bella turned around with two glasses of fruit juice in her hands.

"In an hour or so." she answered Anna and placed one glass in front of her on the table before handing the other to Lucy who took a sip from it.

"Do you want a cup of tea?" she asked Edward as she filled up the kettle again noticing that his cup was empty.

"Yes please." he replied while watching Lucy, she was just about to get her hair in her glass so he stroked it back away from her face. She looked up at him when he did so and smiled. He smiled back before leaning down and kissing her forehead lightly then she went back to drinking her juice.

Anna and Lucy stayed in the kitchen with them as they drank their juice and ate the biscuits Bella had given them. Bella noticed that the whole time Lucy was there Edward's attention was focussed entirely on her. When their biscuits and juice were gone Anna got down from her seat and told them she was going to show Lucy her toys in her room so Edward picked Lucy up off his knee before the two girls went out of the kitchen and up the stairs.

"Well I better get dinner started, is there anything you and Lucy don't like?" Bella asked as she stood and went to the fridge, Edward shook his head in response knowing they'd both pretty much eat anything. He'd always been extremely grateful to end up with a five year old who wasn't at all picky when it came to food, so long as he'd eat something she'd try it. Bella started collecting ingredients and sitting them out on the units as Edward watched her. He'd never been that great at cooking, reading the instructions on the back of a packet and setting the oven temperature to what it said and timing it were about his limit. When he'd been at home he'd never had any reason to learn how to cook and by the time he did there was no one around to teach him so he'd picked up the basics through a lot of trial and error. As Bella started chopping various vegetables and setting pasta on to boil it looked as though she had a pretty good idea of what she was doing and he found it interesting to watch.

Bella could feel him watching her as she cooked and she liked it but as soon as she had that thought she blushed and was glad she had her back to him so he couldn't see it. Trying to distract herself she asked him about his music tastes assuming that if he worked in a music shop he most likely had a strong interest in it and she was right as it allowed them to finally have a proper conversation without any awkward silences. She was pleased to find they had fairly similar tastes although he laughed at some of the bands she mentioned as while he seemed to prefer bands that were a little less mainstream she liked pretty much anything. She liked hearing him laugh though so she didn't mind his reaction and she turned to scowl at him just so she could see him smiling with his eyes sparkling.

"That smells amazing by the way." He commented, pointing at the large dish she'd just poured what looked like some kind of complicated chicken pasta bake into. It was way out of his cooking league and if it tasted as good as it smelled he couldn't wait to try it. He hadn't realised just how hungry he was until then and realised that he really hadn't eaten much at all for the last couple of days so it was good something had reawakened his appetite.

"Thanks, I hope you'll like it." She responded, blushing slightly at the compliment as she put the dish into the oven. When she returned to the table Edward was still smiling at her and it looked as though the lemsip she'd given him had done some good as he didn't look quite so tired anymore.

"I'm sure we will. It's got to be better than anything I could make." He replied truthfully.

"Cooking's not your strong point then?"

"Definitely not. Anything more complicated than spaghetti bolognaise and I'm lost." She laughed at that and he liked the sound of it so much he decided to tell her some of the worst kitchen disasters he'd had over the years. She joined in with some of her mother's, stating that the only reason she could cook was because Renee really couldn't and by the time the pasta bake was done and Bella had called the girls down to eat they were both in hysterics, Bella having to wipe tears away from laughing too much. Lucy and Anna entered the kitchen to find them still laughing and while Anna didn't really notice and just climbed up into a seat at the table Lucy's attention was drawn straight to her dad. She hadn't seen him looking so happy in ages and after glancing from him to Bella she ran across to Bella and hugged her. Bella looked down at her a little bemused after feeling her wrap her arms around her waist.

"Thank you." She whispered so only Bella could hear then let go and headed for the chair next to Edward. Bella watched as she sat smiling at her dad as he managed to stop laughing to ruffle her hair and wondered what Lucy had been thanking her for. She served up and joined everyone at the table and was pleased when Lucy and Edward both tucked in happily. The conversation at the table was taken over by Anna and Lucy as they both excitedly explained what they'd been up to in Anna's room. It sounded like they'd both had fun but by the time the food was gone they were both starting to look tired and it looked liked Edward was headed that way too as his smile had dropped and he kept rubbing at his eyes.

"I think it's time we headed home but thanks for having us over and dinner was amazing." It really had tasted as good as it smelled and although Edward was starting to feel really rough again he was actually glad he'd agreed to go over.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it. If you can hang on a couple of minutes Mum should be home and I can drive you home." Bella responded, standing up to collect the plates.

"We can walk, it's not too far." Bella had already cooked for them, he didn't want to put her out even more by driving them home but she shook her head.

"I really don't mind and I'm not going to take no for an answer so just stay where you are." She replied sternly making the girls giggle as Edward frowned at her but Lucy distracted him by climbing onto his lap and hugging him. It was only a couple of minutes before they heard the front door open and someone come in so Bella told the girls to go and find Lucy's things so she'd be ready to go and just after they'd left the kitchen the woman Edward had seen dropping Anna off at school was standing in the doorway looking at him.

"Mum this is Edward, he brought Lucy round to play with Anna." Bella told her and she smiled.

"Oh, nice to meet you. You're her brother?" she asked as she came into the kitchen and dropped her bag on the table. Bella looked from her mother to Edward to see his uneasy face.

"No, I'm her dad." he replied and Renee looked at him surprised, having completely forgotten that Bella had already explained that the man they usually saw at the school was actually her dad and not her brother. Then she noticed Bella glaring at her and realised she'd probably just said totally the wrong thing and a quick exit would probably be for the best.

"Oh right, sorry. Are the girls upstairs?" She asked, looking to Bella who nodded.

"Yeah, in Anna's room." She answered.

"Ok, I'll go up and see them, tell Anna I'm home." she said and with that was quickly gone from the room.

"I'm sorry. I did tell her before but she's a bit forgetful sometimes." she said quietly, they'd been having a nice relaxed time and she couldn't believe Renee had managed to come in and ruin it. She knew she hadn't meant to and that she didn't have a problem with Edward as she'd already explained it all to her but by the downcast look on Edward's face she could see that he had taken her surprise and exit totally wrong.

"It's ok, everybody thinks that when they first meet us. I'd probably think that if I met someone my age with a five year old." he replied trying to brush it off. It wasn't really that big a deal to him, he'd been thought to be Lucy's brother so many times before he was used to it. It was more what people thought of him when they knew he was her father that bothered him. Renee's quick exit showed she wasn't that comfortable with the idea and he hated it when people thought badly of him for having a five year old child, like his parents did. He wished people would take their opinions from how he was with her now and not the fact he had fathered a child at fourteen.

"She was just surprised, she didn't mean anything by it." Bella tried to reassure him but she could see it fell on deaf ears so instead she just found her car keys and called for the girls to come back down. Once Lucy had said goodbye to Anna, Bella lead them out to her car and helped Lucy into the back again while Edward got in the passenger seat. She drove them home with just the noise from the radio breaking up the silence.

"Thanks for bringing Lucy round." Bella said as they stood by the open car door after having helped Lucy get out and although the atmosphere was still slightly awkward Edward managed to smile slightly.

"Thanks for having us." he replied.

"You should come round again, the girls obviously enjoyed it." Bella said, feeling a little more confident after seeing him smile. "Maybe I could even teach you to cook."

"Maybe, although I think you'd have your work cut out for you with that." He replied with a crooked grin Bella hadn't seen before which made her forget anything else she might have said and she just ended up giggling slightly and waving as Edward and Lucy said goodbye and headed inside.

Once inside Edward tucked Lucy up in bed and kissed her goodnight before taking some of his pills and settling into his own bed. He'd had fun at Bella's house and he thought maybe being friends with her wouldn't be so bad, cookery lessons would definitely be appreciated so he found himself looking forward to the next time Bella invited them over. For now though sleep was definitely needed so he rolled onto his side trying to prevent the coughing fit he could feel threatening him and closed his eyes.


	16. Chapter 14 Nightmares

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

AN - Thank you to everyone whose reading this and especially those who have reviewed, I really appreciate it. Somebody mentioned that they were unsure of Alice's age, so incase anybody is wondering the ages at this point in the story are as follows:

Edward -20, Lucy -5, Emmet -23, Alice - 18, Bella -20, Anna -5

This is a shorter chapter again I'm afraid...it was meant to be longer, but this week has been a lot more hetic than I thought it was going to be and this chapter seemed to split here. I'll try to get the next one up this weekend too as it's pretty much ready to go.

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><p>Chapter 14 - Nightmares<p>

Lucy woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't get back to sleep. Knowing how much her dad needed his sleep right now she didn't want to disturb him but after laying awake for half an hour with no sign of sleep returning she gave up and decided to go and see him. She got out of her bed, quietly walked through to his room and then carefully pushed the door open, trying not to wake him up. As she stepped into the dark room and shut the door again she heard Edward mutter something. At first she thought he was awake but as she moved closer to his bed she saw he was twisting and turning in his sleep causing himself to be tangled up in his cover. Seeing him like that Lucy thought the fever had taken over him again so she climbed up onto his bed beside him so she could place her hand on his forehead and was relieved to find he was a fairly normal temperature so it wasn't that. She frowned not knowing what was wrong with him until he turned to face her and she saw his expression, he looked unhappy and scared. He was having a nightmare.

Edward was running again. As he ran he could hear Lucy crying and this time when he turned a corner he could see her, being held tightly by the blonde man. She was terrified and so was he as he tried to run to her but found he had been caught by the dark haired man and was being held back. Lucy was crying and shouting for him but he could do nothing to get to her then she screamed and Edward saw why instantly - a knife had just been pulled out and it was being pointed in her direction. The man holding her said something but to Edward, as he struggled to reach Lucy, it sounded like nothing more than random gargles. He jerked awake to see Lucy sat next to him looking concerned and he realised he was crying. He tried to wipe the tears away to stop Lucy seeing them but it was too late for that.

"You had a nightmare." She stated and Edward nodded knowing there was no point lying to her now as she'd seen all the proof she needed.

"What you doing up?" He asked trying to change the subject so he wouldn't have to tell her anything about his nightmares. There was no point in scaring her, they were just his minds manifestation of his fears and so long as he didn't tell anyone about what was happening he was hoping they wouldn't come true.

"Couldn't get to sleep." she answered, "Can I stay with you?"

Edward lifted his cover up in response, allowing her to move under it then wrapped his arms around her and she cuddled into his chest where she fell asleep almost instantly. Her presence also calmed him down enough to get back to sleep and with the warmth of Lucy's body against his chest comforting him and letting him know she was safe and in his arms he didn't have the nightmare. As far as he was concerned nothing could hurt her there.

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><p>Edward was woken up by Lucy gently pushing his shoulder and as his eyes opened and focussed he realised she was already dressed ready for school. He looked to the clock and saw they only had half an hour before they had to leave so Lucy must have turned off the alarm clock to let him sleep for longer.<p>

"How come you're up and dressed and I'm still in bed?" He asked as he sat up and Lucy smiled, pleased with her plan to let him sleep in.

"You needed more sleep." She said simply. "But now I need breakfast."

"I should imagine you do." He replied and started to pull himself out of bed. Lucy went back through to the kitchen then to leave him to get dressed and once he was ready he joined her and got the cereal out for her before making himself some coffee to try and wake up a little more as he still felt like he needed more sleep. When Lucy had finished eating and had run off to the bathroom he sorted his hair out and found his pills. He was feeling slightly better but the sore throat and aches were still bothering him.

"Lucy hurry up, we need to go in a minute." he called out as he realised they only had five minutes before they needed to leave. Lucy was almost instantly in front of him holding out her hair brush. He took it from her and carefully brushed her hair, smoothing out all the tangles before he tied it up into bunches to keep it out of her way at school. He then looked to her feet and saw she already had her shoes on so bent down to fasten them for her.

When they stepped out into the fresh air of the street Edward quickly looked around, searching for the blonde man and his friends but he couldn't see them. As they walked Lucy was happily talking to him about how much fun she'd had with Anna yesterday and Edward heard her mention something about Bella but realised he hadn't been paying enough attention to work out what she'd said so he tried to concentrate harder on what Lucy was saying after that but she didn't mention Bella again.

When they reached the school Edward crouched down to kiss her forehead and hug her before she said goodbye and ran into the playground, quickly finding Anna. Edward slowly stood straight again and walked up to the fencing of the playground watching Lucy. She looked so happy it caused him to smile in reflex and he was so lost in watching her that he didn't notice Bella walk up and stop next to him.

"You're looking a little better today." She commented, the dark circles under his eyes weren't quite as bad and the smile on his face was a lot better than the panic and pain he'd started off with yesterday afternoon. He also looked a lot more put together with his hair tamed to his usual disarray rather than yesterday's chaotic mess.

"Thanks, I feel it too." He responded pulling his gaze away from Lucy to look at Bella. She'd got her hair pulled up into a messy bun and he wasn't sure if she looked prettier with it up or down. It made her eyes stand out a little more with just a few wisps of hair falling down around her face. Realising what he was thinking about he quickly looked back to where the girls were playing to see them whispering together while glancing between himself and Bella. Thoughts like that were definitely not allowed.

"I'm glad to hear that. You guys got any plans for the weekend?" She'd also caught sight of the girls and narrowed her eyes at Anna wondering what they were planning. If it involved more surprise play dates they were going to be disappointed. She'd got too much college work to get done to be conned into anymore park trips and as much as she'd have liked to invite Edward and Lucy round at the weekend she wouldn't have time with several big assignments due in and a couple of them being group projects. There was also the fact Anna had been annoying her all morning refusing to do as she was told so there would be no extra play time until she started behaving again.

"I'm working on Saturday and shopping on Sunday so not really."

"Sounds more fun than the study groups I've got planned." She commented and Edward smiled at that; he maybe didn't lead a very exciting life but homework was certainly one of the things he didn't miss. He'd only ever completed the basics when it came to college, he'd managed to get through enough courses to be able to get a decent job and then they'd needed the money more than he'd needed any further education.

"Anyway, I just came over to say hello, I've got to get to college now, enjoy the rest of your day." She said after checking her watch and realising she really did have to get going or she'd be late for her first class.

"You too." He replied then watched her leave before turning back to the playground; it was definitely getting easier to have a normal conversation with Bella but he couldn't decide whether that was a good or a bad thing so he tried to stop thinking about it before he depressed himself again. The bell had rung by then and he managed to just catch sight of Lucy as she ran into the building along with Anna so happy she was safely in school he turned around and started to slowly walk home, one thought firmly stuck in his head - he needed more sleep when he got in.

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><p>His alarm clock woke him up in time to sort his hair out again after having had the nightmare several times throughout the day. The extra sleep had done him good as his headache seemed to finally be letting up but after having the nightmare again he wanted nothing more than to see Lucy. He reached the school gates well before the bell was due to ring and spotted that Bella was already there.<p>

"Didn't fall asleep again today then?" She asked as she spotted him so he walked across to her.

"I did but I remembered to set an alarm." He answered, noting that this time it was her that looked tired and stressed out. The messy bun she'd had her hair in that morning was now even messier with more hair falling loose around her face and there appeared to be a pen sticking out of the bun. That, along with the messenger bag she was carrying that looked full to bursting point with a rolled up stack of papers trying to escape out of one side suggested she'd had a busy day. "How was college?"

"Long and boring and now I've got an afternoon of running around after a five year old monster." She sighed causing Edward to raise an eyebrow at her.

"I'm sure she can't be that bad." Anna had seemed quite well behaved from what he'd seen of her so far and Lucy's tales from school. He couldn't remember her ever mentioning Anna getting into trouble and he was sure it would have come up. Lucy always told him everything from school in an almost minute by minute account.

"Phil's home this weekend so she's overexcited and has decided that as I'm just her sister she doesn't have to listen to me." Bella explained then glared at Edward when she saw him grin.

"Ah, well good luck with that." He commented, he was so glad Lucy wasn't too prone to tantrums and when she got overexcited he usually just joined in. It was kind of nice not to be the one that was frazzled for once.

"What? No brilliant ideas for calming her down? You're so good with Lucy." She really didn't want to have to deal with Anna and any suggestions on how to get around her tantrums and hyperactivity would have been greatly appreciated, after a very busy day at college she didn't have any patience left. Edward however just shrugged.

"I'm lucky, Lucy's never been one for throwing tantrums and acting up. She's pretty laid back about everything."

"So not fair." Bella grumbled then the bell rang so their conversation died as they both turned to look out for Lucy and Anna. Edward spotted Lucy first as she ran up to them with Anna trailing behind her. Lucy got her hug from Edward before pulling away and quickly hugging Bella too after seeing how happy her dad looked again. Anna meanwhile smiled shyly up at Edward before turning to Bella with a scowl.

"Where's Daddy?" she asked making Bella sigh.

"When did mommy say he'd get home this morning?" she asked, they'd already had this conversation three times that morning.

"Bedtime."

"Well is it bedtime yet?" Anna shook her head before crossing her arms over her chest.

"I want Daddy." She demanded while stamping her foot and Edward was torn between finding Bella's exasperation funny and feeling sorry for her. He'd had his fair share of tantrums to deal with while working at the crèche so he knew how frustrating they were to deal with but there was just something funny about the way the two sisters were glaring at each other. Bella was certainly going to have her hands full for the afternoon. Noticing that Edward and Lucy were still there and watching them Bella glanced to Edward and saw the amusement in his eyes.

"I'm so glad this is amusing you." She said sarcastically, "She'll be like this the rest of the night."

"You might want to go after her." Was his only response as while Bella had been looking at him Anna had turned and started walking away.

"Phil better get home early or I'm going to end up killing her. I guess I better go, see you Monday."

"Bye and bribery always works without the jail time you'd get for murder!" Edward commented with a smile as Bella chased after Anna who by the looks of it had decided running away from her was a fun game. He found Bella rather cute when she was annoyed but that was another trip into dangerous territory so he returned his focus to Lucy who was telling him how well she'd done in their spelling test.

"I like Bella." Lucy announced as she skipped along beside Edward on their way home having exhausted the topic of what she'd done at school for the day. "Do you like her?"

"She's nice." He answered truthfully. He'd known from the first time he'd seen her that he'd like her if given the chance and now that he couldn't avoid interacting with her he was finding he minded it less and less each time they talked. He still felt awkward around her but she seemed to have a natural talent for distracting him and making him smile and it was starting to be an addictive trait. He didn't like talking to people in general as he didn't like how they reacted to his life but Bella seemed to have reacted ok so far to the little he'd told her or at least was good enough to hide her real thoughts from him for the sake of the girls and he could handle that. It was just nice to actually talk to someone one for a change although he was still trying not to think about the fact his plan to stay detached was obviously failing, and probably had been since the moment she gave them a lift the night they'd been lost.

"When can we go to their house again?"

"I don't know Luce, we have to wait for Bella to invite us."

"Oh...can they come round to our flat then?"

"Not yet, maybe when I know them a little better." He tried to stall, he didn't want Bella to see what their flat was like and he doubted that if she did see it she'd want Anna there. They lived in a nice comfortable house that their flat could never compare too. Lucy accepted that answer without a fight and as he didn't want to lose the good mood Bella had left him in and he hadn't seen any signs they were being followed that afternoon he decided to take Lucy home via the park so she could see the ducks. It wasn't until they were out of the park that Lucy's questions started up again.

"If Anna's my best friend, does that mean Bella's yours?"

"It doesn't work that way Luce." He answered wondering what five year old logic she was using to come up with that idea. They weren't really even friends yet but if they were that would make her his only friend as Garrett didn't really count considering he was his boss and if that was the case, she'd be his best friend by default. He didn't let Lucy in on that thought though it did make him smile before Lucy started asking him a load of questions on how best friends worked, apparently unable to see why Bella couldn't be his. Eventually he told her that Bella probably already had a best friend and she seemed to accept that although he could see that look in her eyes that suggested she was planning something but he left it alone, intrigued to see what she would actually come up with.

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><p>"What are your nightmares about?" Lucy asked as they sat doing a jigsaw after dinner. Edward's head jerked up to look at her in surprise as he'd thought he'd escaped her questions on that subject when she'd let it drop the night before and hadn't brought it up in the morning. He didn't want to have to tell her what they were about but he didn't want to lie to her either.<p>

"They're not important, I'm fine so just forget about them." he answered her, hoping she'd let it drop again and spare him from having to think of an explanation for her, he really didn't want her worrying about him. She could see he was lying but he'd been happy all afternoon and she didn't really want to ruin that by making him talk about something he obviously didn't want to talk about. She'd only asked again as the jigsaw they were working on was of a spooky looking house and it had reminded her about them.

"You look tired." she told him instead of arguing as although he seemed happy it was obvious he still wasn't feeling that great as he'd been rubbing at his eyes a little and his coughing fits had been increasing in frequency over the last hour.

"I am sweetheart but I'm ok for a bit longer." he replied and she could see nothing in his eyes to suggest he was lying this time so was satisfied that he really was ok and not hiding anything majorly important from her. She still wanted to know what his nightmares were about but if he said they weren't important and she should forget about them she knew she should do as he said. That didn't mean she couldn't help though as he'd seemed to sleep better with her there.

"Can I stay with you again tonight?"

"Course you can." He was glad she wanted to stay with him as it had helped get rid of his nightmares the night before and he hoped her being there would do that again but although he was tired, it was still quite early so he didn't want to go to sleep yet.

"Do you have to do any reading for school?" He asked figuring it would distract Lucy from all the questions she'd been throwing at him since getting out of school and it would involve enough concentration from him that he wouldn't just fall asleep on her. He was trying to convince her everything was fine with him and falling asleep early would not help with that.

"Yeah." She mumbled, scowl in place at just the mention of it as she still hated it.

"Come on then, let's get it out of the way." He said as he put the last piece into their jigsaw. Lucy fetched her school bag then joined Edward in the living room where she pulled her reading book out from her bag and settled down on his lap. He shuffled slightly in the seat as he got comfy, one arm loosely around Lucy and the other holding one side of the book while Lucy held the other. She looked up at him and he kissed her head lightly before she looked back to the book and began to read. She struggled her way through a couple of pages, Edward helping her with some words before she got really stuck and frustrated with it.

"Lucy calm down." Edward said softly as she tried to grab the book, close it and throw it away. She looked up at him and he could see angry tears working their way down her cheeks.

"I can't do it!" She complained grumpily while Edward moved his hand to gently brush her tears away.

"Yes you can, just calm down and I'll help you." He said as he rocked her slightly.

"I can't do it." She repeated stubbornly so Edward lightly kissed her head again.

"Yes you can." He continued to rock her until she slowly calmed down then when her tears had subsided and she was left just looking slightly miserable and grumpy he opened the book again.

"Come on, let's try again and get this all finished." he said and she nodded and rubbed her eyes. Edward pointed to the word she'd been stuck at and said it slowly and clearly for her, moving his finger along the word at each new sound. Lucy then tried to sound it out for herself and after a couple more times of Edward saying it for her she managed it. When she got it right she looked up at him and smiled before looking back to the book and continuing on to the next page. The rest of the reading homework was done without any more tears and the book was left sat on the floor as Lucy sat curled up in Edward's arms as they watched TV for the rest of the night.

Edward looked down at himself as he got changed for bed and sighed as he took in his bruise covered torso, running his hand lightly over his stomach he winced from the pain the contact of his hand caused. He looked up when he felt somebody else watching him and spotted Lucy stood unsurely in the doorway, staring straight at his chest. He pulled the t-shirt he slept in over his head wincing as the fabric caught a sore spot on his back.

"You coming in or are you just going stand there all night?" he asked with a smile, hoping if he ignored the bruises she would too. She just nodded and crossed the room to jump up onto his bed. He got in beside her and after taking his pills looked back to Lucy who was still watching him and ruffled her hair. She ducked out of the way of his hand causing him to laugh while she tried to look annoyed but ended up grinning instead, Edward's laugh being rather infectious to her. She loved it.

"Time for sleep." He commented as he laid down and opened his arms for Lucy to cuddle up to him. His eyes fell shut straight away as his exhaustion caught up with him but Lucy didn't want to sleep as when she closed her eyes she saw his bruises. She wanted to know why her daddy was being hurt, it was the first time she'd seen the full extent of his bruises and she hated seeing him hurt like he was.

"Why do they hurt you?" Lucy suddenly asked, her voice breaking through the silence and Edward's eyes snapped open. He sat up, suddenly wide awake and switched on the lamp on his bedside table so he could see her.

"What made you ask that?" He asked, she'd sat up now too and he could see she looked sad.

"You're covered in bruises." She stated and Edward nodded to that as he was. "Why do they do that to you?"

"I don't know baby." He said but she shook her head and he looked down, away from her. To him it seemed that even Lucy now thought he must have done something to set it all off and it hurt more than the bruises ever had.

"I honestly don't know baby, there's nothing else I can tell you." He muttered.

"Why?" Lucy asked and Edward didn't know what to say. If she didn't have faith in him then who ever would? Lucy was the only person he had ever really tried to prove himself to and now she thought he had done something he hadn't and it crushed him. He needed Lucy to believe in him.

"Daddy?" Lucy asked when he didn't answer her and he kept his head down. She moved so she could see his face and when she did she saw a tear winding its way down his face and she suddenly realised what he thought she meant.

"No Daddy." She said firmly and he finally looked at her again, confused by what she meant.

"I swear I didn't do anything." He said and Lucy nodded.

"I know Daddy." She responded and Edward looked at her even more confused. She ignored that though and moved to sit on his lap. He stayed quiet as he watched her and once she'd settled herself she looked up at him and reached up to brush away another tear. Edward was totally confused as to what Lucy was meaning with everything. It was the first time this had ever happened to them and he just didn't know what she meant or how to take the things she was asking. By the look on her face he could tell he had taken what she had asked so far the wrong way as she was starting to get frustrated but she was still more concerned over him.

"I don't understand." Lucy started again and Edward opened his mouth to say that he knew nothing but Lucy shook her head to stop him. He watched as her face screwed up in thought but he waited for her to say whatever it was she was thinking about. "Why do they hurt you?"

"Lucy I don't know, I honestly don't know." He told her but she sighed shook her head again.

"No. I don't mean that!" she said and Edward felt his battle against the tears failing as yet another one found its way down his face.

"How could they hurt you?" Lucy asked and Edward finally realised what she had been meaning all along - and his tears won the battle. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close to his chest as tears flooded down his face. Lucy hugged him back hoping that he'd calm down soon, she'd never known him upset like this over something she'd said. Edward was so relieved though. He realised now that what Lucy had meant all along was how could they hurt him in the sense of how could anybody hurt him. She couldn't understand how anyone could because as far as she was concerned he could never do anything that would mean he deserved what they had done to him. Lucy was unaware that he'd suddenly figured it out and didn't like him crying so pulled out of the hug so she could see his face.

"Don't cry." she pleaded so he tried to smile but he had no control over the tears and he couldn't really explain why he was crying now anyway, he just was.

"Daddy don't cry! I'm sorry!" Lucy tried again, starting to get alarmed by the fact he was still crying.

"It's not your fault baby, I'm sorry, I'm being daft." he assured her and she nodded to agree that he was indeed being daft. She hugged him again then though so Edward moved to make them both be lying down again, Lucy still held close against his chest. She happily snuggled into him and he finally started to calm down.

"I'm sorry I keep getting hurt Lucy." Edward mumbled once the tears had stopped but Lucy didn't respond as the late hour had finally gotten to her and she'd fallen asleep. He kissed her head before whispering that he loved her and closing his eyes himself, praying for a nightmare free sleep so he wouldn't continue to worry Lucy.


	17. Chapter 15 Run Rabbit, Run

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

_AN- I'm sorry for the last chapter turning up in bold. It wasn't intentional, it all looked normal on the orginal file and when I previewed it on here so I don't know what happened but I'll keep a closer eye out for it doing it again. I really don't understand how the formating works on here so sorry for any more mistakes like that._ _To make up for that screw up here's the next chapter._

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><p><strong>Chapter 15 – Run Rabbit, Run.<strong>

The next morning they were both awake early. Edward felt almost back to normal and after taking his pills he was more than ready for work. Lucy was chirpy like she normally was and was quite happy to be going to the shop with him. On the way there he'd spotted the red haired woman following them but she kept her distance and they made it to the shop safely. Once there Garrett was pleased to see Edward looking well although he noticed he was still coughing occasionally and the bruises were still dark against his pale skin. He looked like he'd lost a little more weight as well but that would probably reappear now he was feeling better again.

The day in the shop ended up being fun for all of them. Garrett's paper work had been left forgotten on his desk as he had chosen to play with Lucy instead and the shop had been moderately busy so Edward hadn't gotten bored and with knowing Lucy was there, where he was, he hadn't been worrying all day either. It had reached the end of his shift and although he was getting tired again he was actually slightly sad to be going.

"Lucy you better go get your bag sorted out, we'll be going soon." He called out as she was currently looking at all the CDs with Garrett.

"Ok." she answered as she ran through to the back. Garrett watched her go before walking back around the shop to one of the shelves they'd started at. He reached out and picked up one of the CDs before walking towards the counter where Edward was still stood watching him curiously. He came round the counter and scanned the CD before putting it into a bag and handing it to Edward.

"For Lucy, she really likes the cover of that one." He explained and Edward smiled gratefully as he took the bag. He looked in it and laughed when he saw the CD.

"Three guesses on why she loves that one." he commented making Garrett laugh too. It was the CD with the duck on the cover she'd seen when Emmett was there.

"Thank you." Edward said but Garrett shook his head.

"No need for thanks." He responded before wandering through to the back and Edward heard him talking to Lucy.

"You better go to your Daddy, I gave him something for you." He heard him say and then seconds later Lucy appeared in front of Edward grinning so he crouched down and gave her the CD. She pulled it out of the bag before turning around to Garrett who was stood behind her. She reached her arms out so he picked her up, allowing her to hug him before she kissed his cheek.

"Thank you!" she said and Garrett smiled while setting her back on her feet.

"Your welcome, you better be off now, you'll be wanting your dinner soon." He said and Lucy turned back to Edward who now had his jacket on and was ready to leave.

"See you on Monday." Edward said to Garrett as he took hold of Lucy's hand and they headed towards the door of the shop.

"Bye bye." Lucy called as she waved.

"Bye Bye Lucy and see you Monday Edward." Garrett replied as they left the shop. He moved across to the window and watched them as they went down the street before noticing a couple stepping out from the dry cleaner's across the street. Neither of them were carrying anything and he watched them as they headed off in the same direction as Edward and Lucy were going feeling the hairs on the back of his neck stand for some unknown reason before he moved away from the window.

"Get home safely Edward." He muttered to the empty shop. 

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><p>Edward looked over his shoulder and as they walked and saw the red headed woman had now been joined by the blonde man. They were a safe distance away from them though so Edward didn't panic but he knew they'd been following them right from the shop. He didn't understand why they were just following him but guessed it may be because Lucy was there. They hadn't harmed her when she'd gone out on her own and he knew they'd have been around and they didn't come close when he was with her. Realising that had prevented him from panicking as it looked as if they really wouldn't harm her and so long as Lucy was safe he didn't care. They could scare and hurt him all they liked so long as she wasn't harmed. He did have the nagging worry of what would happen to Lucy if something did happen to him meaning he couldn't look after her but he was just hoping that someone would be kind enough to take over his place, he thought that maybe his parents would find it in their hearts to take her in even if they were still ashamed of him.<p>

Once they were home Edward made them macaroni cheese for dinner and let Lucy put on the CD Garrett had given her as it had turned out to be a pop compilation. He knew Lucy hadn't wanted it for the music, just for the cover but she seemed to like the songs once they were played. She spent most of the night staring at the booklet she'd pulled out of the CD case after discovering it contained several pictures of different coloured bath ducks. Edward had nearly laughed when he saw how excited she looked at finding the pictures but managed to stop himself and instead he had suggested she tried drawing some herself which had kept her busy until bath time.

Edward had never had any problems getting Lucy into the bath, the problems came when he had to get her out of it. As soon as the bath was full with bubbly water Lucy was eager to get into it to play with all her rubber ducks and not wanting to get soaked from all Lucy's splashing around Edward retreated to the corridor where he sat down outside the bathroom's open door - safe from the water but close enough to know if anything was wrong. He sat leant against the wall, listening to the splashes and giggling from inside the bathroom, smiling softly until Lucy called him back in to wash her hair.

"Is there any water left in that bath?" he joked when he saw the soaked floor surrounding the bath.

"Loads." she grinned in reply and by the look of that grin Edward just knew the rest of that water was going to end up on him.

"You want me to wash your hair now then?" he asked as he moved to the side of the bath.

"Yep" Lucy answered so Edward knelt down at the side of the bath, cringing when he felt the water soak through his jeans. She continued to play with her ducks and moved about as he tried to wash her hair, causing splashes of water to hit his t-shirt.

"Hold still Luce." Edward told her as the shampoo lathered up but Lucy took no notice of what he said and splashed him on purpose.

"Lucy" he moaned, "I'm wet now." she just giggled again and he sighed before joining in.

"Ok, unless you want shampoo in your eyes you'd better hold still and close your eyes." He warned as he got the shower head and turned it on, waiting for the water to heat up.

"Ok." she answered, calming down and sitting still, one of the toy ducks clutched in her hand as she hated that part of baths. Edward ran his fingers through her hair as he rinsed it to make sure all the shampoo was gone.

"You can open them again." he told her as he turned the shower head off and reached for her conditioner. He smoothed conditioner over her hair making sure it was all covered before he got the comb and combed it through before rinsing it out again.

"All done. You going to get out now?" he asked when he was done only for Lucy to shake her head and spray him with water.

"Nope." She answered and then went back to playing with her ducks.

"Luce the waters getting cold now." He tried to persuade her out of it.

"It's not." She argued.

"It is. Come on, it's time to get out." He told her and when she still showed no sign of stopping playing with the ducks he stood up. To get her out it was going to have to be the way where he got soaked. He leant down to pick her up and as she always did when he made her get out she splashed him as much as she could. She was finally out of bath though and wrapped in a large fluffy towel.

"I'll go get your pyjamas" Edward said before he left the bathroom and went through to Lucy's room. He got a clean pair of pyjamas out of her drawers - a pink set covered in little yellow ducks. He took them through to the bathroom and found Lucy stood in her vest and underwear with the towel over her head as she attempted to dry her hair. He walked across to her and lifted the towel off her head causing her to look up at him.

"Daddy!" She said happily and he grinned.

"Do you want your hair up in a towel?" he asked and she nodded so he found a smaller towel and wrapped her hair up in it for her, twisting it up on her head to keep it wrapped up and out of her way.

"Thank you," She said then noticed which pyjamas he'd brought through, "Duckies!"

"Yup, now let's get you into them." He said and she took the pyjamas and put them on, letting Edward do up the buttons on the top for her. Once she was dressed Edward pulled the plug out of the bath then picked Lucy up.

"We'll get your milk and biscuit then it's bed time for you." Edward told her as he carried her through to the kitchen.

"Ok." She replied, suddenly feeling quite tired so she leant into Edwards shoulder. He looked down at her and smiled before kissing the top of her head.

"Sleepy?" He asked as he disentangled her from his body and placed her in a chair.

"Yup." she mumbled. Edward smiled again before he set about getting her a glass of milk. After she drank that and had eaten her biscuit Edward took her through to her room and tucked her into bed. He lightly kissed her forehead before turning off her light and leaving her alone. Lucy fell asleep quickly to happy dreams of feeding ducks that were swimming around in their bath.

Edward went through to his room to change his t-shirt, not wanting to sit around in a damp top when he knew he wasn't completely well yet. He found a clean t-shirt and pulled the one he was wearing off then chucked it in his washing basket, remembering he still had to do the washing when he glanced at it. With his dry t-shirt on he went into the living room and laid out on the sofa, turning the TV on with the remote.

Edward watched TV until around ten by which time he'd got bored of it so he wandered through to the kitchen looking for something to occupy him for a while. As he saw the washing machine he thought about doing the washing but decided against it because of the time. Instead he settled for just tidying up a bit and getting the washing up done.

He finished that and moved into the bathroom. It had been left in quite a state after Lucy's bath. He picked up the clothes Lucy had left on the floor along with a towel and took them through to the kitchen, shoving them into the washing machine before going back to the bathroom. He ran some cold water into the bath rinsing it and removing the few remaining bubbles on the toy ducks. He then picked up all the toy ducks and placed them back in their places on the side of the bath. Satisfied the bathroom was now tidy, Edward went back into the living room where he flopped down onto the sofa before springing back up when he noticed all of Lucy's toys still covering the floor. He collected them all up and took them to Lucy's room to put them all away. He opened the door carefully, not wanting to wake her and left the door open, letting the light from the corridor spill into the room so he could see without turning on the main light. He quietly set about putting all of her toys away in their right places and when that was done Edward crossed over to Lucy's bed and knelt down at the side of it looking at her peaceful sleeping face. He smiled gently before lightly brushing her slightly damp hair away from her face. He sat for a while just watching her and occasionally brushing away any strands of hair that fell across her face.

He eventually got up and left Lucy's room for his own deciding it was time for him to go to bed. Once there though he found he couldn't sleep, the thought of having the nightmares again preventing him from even wanting to. He rolled over a couple of times and kicked the quilt off only to pull it back on trying to get comfortable before finally falling still laying flat on his back staring up at his ceiling until a coughing fit hit him and he rolled back onto his side. His head was starting to ache again and the coughing had hurt his chest and throat. He knew his body needed sleep so he tried to think of something happy to fall asleep too in the hope it would ward off any nightmares and the first thing that came into his head was the image of Lucy hugging Bella outside the school gates. He'd been surprised when she'd done that but the smile on her face and the responding one on Bella's had sent a strange pleasant feeling through him which he'd tried to ignore at the time and it had quickly passed to be replaced with amusement as Bella and Anna argued. He wondered how Bella had got on once they'd got home and hoped Anna hadn't annoyed her too much even if Bella did look cute when annoyed. Realising his thoughts were going in a dangerous direction again he tried to just blank his mind but it didn't work as he was left picturing a smiling Bella.

After a while he gave up on sleep all together as it just wasn't coming even though his body was too tired to do anything else. He resumed his staring at the ceiling and as he did so he started to think about old memories of the many sleepless nights he'd had when Lucy was a baby. Some nights he'd have to stay up with her all night long as every time he tried to put her down in her cot she'd cry. There was one particular night that stuck out for him. Him and Lucy had been in the flat for only a week. Edward was exhausted, the pressures of suddenly having a baby and not knowing what to do having got to him and badly. It had to have been one of the worst weeks he had ever had and during it he had started to resent Lucy, hating her for having forced him away from his family and subjecting him to the life he saw himself having. He hadn't managed to find a job yet so he'd had no money and the flat only had in it what the landlord had furnished it with and it only had a cot as the landlord had felt so sorry for him. Edward himself had had nowhere near enough food all week, the little money he had having gone on nappies and milk formula for Lucy. All that week he had found himself close to yelling or tears, it had been a too closer call to say which one. He'd wanted his mum so much, he didn't know how to look after Lucy and it just made it so much harder, he'd wanted his mum to show him what to do, to help him and to just be there for him but because of Lucy he didn't have that. The more she cried the more he just wanted to dump her somewhere and as he didn't know what he was doing she cried a lot. It was the Friday night of that week though that changed everything. Edward had finally got Lucy to sleep in her cot after a very hard day with her crying. He'd flopped onto the sofa, exhausted and hungry but he knew there was no food left and he'd started worrying about what he'd do for the next week. He had been thinking about where he could get a job and how hard that would be when he'd felt the tears coursing down his cheeks. He didn't bother trying to stop them knowing that he needed to cry so he just sat there and cried for over an hour. After that hour was up he'd got up and gone through to Lucy's room. When he was there he'd walked right up to her cot and looked down at her in it. She was still fast asleep, one arm holding a small soft toy duck tightly to her. It was looking at her then, when she was peaceful and asleep that he realised he had no right to resent her. None of this was her fault, it was all his and he'd started to cry again. As he did he saw Lucy's eyes open and she looked at him. She didn't cry, just looked at him and wriggled slightly. He'd leant down and picked her up, holding her close to himself and she'd stayed quiet. He'd watched her in his arms as she'd just closed her eyes and gone back to sleep. Edward had then gone through to his room and sat down on his bed with her still in his arms. He stayed like that the whole night, watching her. She didn't wake up once through the whole night and it was that night that he felt something click into place. He knew that he did love Lucy and that he'd work things out somehow and he'd make it up to her for resenting her all that week. It was after that night that he'd worked out that if she kept waking all he had to do was sit with her and she'd be settled.

He was brought out of his memories by the sound of crying. At first he thought he was just imagining it, that it was part of his memories but then he realised that Lucy was actually crying. He jumped out of bed and rushed through to her room. As he went into it he turned the light on and saw her sat up in bed, rubbing her eyes as she cried. He went across to her and sat down on her bed before pulling her onto his lap and hugging her tightly. She buried her head into his chest and he rocked her slightly.

"Shhhh baby, it's ok...it's ok." He mumbled, trying to comfort her and calm her down, "Shhhhh."

He kissed the top of her head before he started stroking her hair, knowing that that often calmed her. He kept rocking her and telling her it was ok until he heard her sniffling and guessed she'd calmed down enough to talk to him.

"What's wrong baby?" He asked her and she looked up at him with her red eyes half hidden by the hair that had fallen over her face. He brushed the hair away and tucked it behind her ear.

"Nightmare." She told him and he kissed her forehead.

"Awwww poor baby. What was it about?" He asked, hoping it was nothing to do with what had been happening to him.

"We went to the park...and when we went to feed the ducks...they were all dead." she said and he couldn't help but feel relieved, glad that it was just a meaningless child's nightmare.

"Awww baby it's ok, we'll go to the park tomorrow when we go out to get shopping and we can make sure all the ducks are ok." He suggested making her smile slightly before burying her face into his chest again.

"Thank you." She said, her voice muffled by his chest. He kissed her head again before he stood up, picking her up at the same time. He took her through to his room where he sat down in his bed, Lucy on his lap and still cuddled into his chest. He pulled the quilt up around them both and just sat there with her, watching as she slowly fell back to sleep.

Edward ended up staying awake all night, content with just watching Lucy. When it reached early morning he couldn't stay still any longer so he carefully moved Lucy to be laid down in his bed then got up and put the washing on, not wanting to wake her up until a more reasonable time. He wanted to have a fun day and a tired grumpy Lucy was not the way to do that. The washing on and nothing else to do he made himself a cup of coffee and took it through to the living room where he turned the TV onto an early morning kids channel that was showing old cartoons.

As the monsters mask was just about to be pulled off and the criminals face revealed in Scooby Doo Edward looked up to see Lucy coming into the living room, looking sleepy and still in her pyjamas. He glanced at the clock and saw it was still early really but didn't wonder why Lucy was up, just lifted her up onto his knee when she went across to him. She curled up, leaning into his chest and he smiled as he brushed her hair out of her eyes.

"Still tired?" He asked her and she nodded and yawned.

"We'll watch cartoons for a bit then before getting ready to go out." He suggested and she smiled before turning her head slightly to see the TV, the end credits of Scooby Doo just finishing and the TV presenter's faces appearing as they introduced the next programme - Tom and Jerry Kids. Edward glared slightly at the TV wondering why they still showed the repeats of such old cartoons that he had never really liked in the first place. He thought they should just put Scooby Doo back on again. Lucy though didn't seem to mind, she watched it, smiling at the bits she found funny, too sleepy to laugh and Edward decided he'd watch her instead of the cartoon.

They eventually got themselves sorted for the day with breakfast eaten and Lucy dressed in a pale blue dress and matching cardigan that Edward hadn't seen her wear for a while. With some left over bread swinging from a bag in Lucy's hand they left the flat and headed straight for the park.

As soon as they entered the park Lucy started tugging on Edward's hand slightly, wanting to get to the ducks. Amused by her excitement Edward slowed his walk rather than hurrying and he couldn't help laughing when she suddenly stopped and turned to face him, glaring at him through frustration. He just grinned and dropped her hand.

"Come on then... I thought you wanted to see those ducks." He taunted before he started to run. Lucy watched him with wide eyes for a minute before she chased after him. Edward slowed down slightly when he saw her following so she could catch him and they were both laughing as they reached the duck pond, Lucy slightly ahead of Edward who caught hold of her before she could get too close to the water.

"See...they're still here." He commented and Lucy just giggled as she pulled out of his grip to open the bag of bread to feed the ducks. She passed a piece to Edward and then they both stood throwing small bits of the bread into the pond, Lucy happily watching all the ducks swarm around them. When Edward's slice of bread was gone he turned from looking at the ducks to watching Lucy, smiling at the grin that lit up her whole face. It seemed her nightmare was long forgotten.

When the bread was all gone Edward managed to pull Lucy away from the duck pond so they could walk further in to town to get the food shopping they needed done. He hadn't seen anyone suspicious around but by the time they reached Garrett's the lack of anyone following them was beginning to make him nervous. For all he hated them following him, he'd got used to it and he didn't like the fact they seemed to be deviating from their usual routine. He didn't know what that would mean for them and as much as he tried to convince himself they were just busy and had found something better to spend their time doing than scaring him he just didn't quite believe it. He tried not to let his nervousness show to Lucy, it had been his intention to have a fun day and it was his own nerves that were destroying that.

They reached the main shopping district were the streets were a lot more crowded with shoppers and Edward's attention shifted from looking out for people following them to just keeping hold of Lucy's hand so he wouldn't lose her in the crowds. He let Lucy pull him into her favourite toy shop so she could look at the new toys for a little while but she took him straight to the shelves of baby dolls and spent all their time in the shop looking at the different accessory sets for the doll he'd bought her before. Eventually Lucy had decided she'd see enough so they stepped back out onto the street where Edward got the unwelcome feeling of being watched. He looked around them, Lucy happily unaware of his discomfort, but couldn't see anyone for the crowds. Even so his grip on Lucy's hand tightened slightly causing her to look up at him questioningly. He noticed and smiled slightly to her to reassure her nothing was wrong which seemed to satisfy her as she looked back ahead of them and they started walking again. They'd only passed a couple more shops when a high, almost childlike voice called out, halting Edward instantly.

"Hey James! Look who it is, what a pleasant surprise." The red headed woman was standing right in front of them, having just stepped out of a coffee shop. She was smiling brightly at them and Edward automatically picked Lucy up ready to make a run for it. He knew the change in their usual pattern couldn't have been good but at least he now had a name to go on as the blonde haired man had joined the woman now, wrapping his arm around her waist and staring straight at him.

"Well well Vicky you're right. How lovely to see you again Edward." The cold smile was back, it didn't reach his eyes as all that was there was malice. Vicky didn't seem to mind as she just cuddled into his side and Edward didn't know what to make of the situation. They didn't seem to be attacking him, and he couldn't see any sign of the other two men but he wondered if this was working into being some kind of trap. There were people all around them so they couldn't really do anything but he'd still got the urge to run. Lucy was warily looking at the couple in front of them, she could tell from her dad's silence and stiff posture that he didn't like them and she thought she recognized the woman although she didn't think she'd seen the man before.

"Not going to say anything Edward?" James questioned but Edward didn't respond instead he set Lucy down and took hold of her hand before walking past them, praying that they wouldn't do anything in broad daylight on a busy street. It seemed he was right as James and Vicky didn't follow but turned around to watch them leave.

"You can run all you like, but you can't hide." James called after them which only spurred Edward to walk faster as he still didn't know where the other two men were and he didn't think it was just a coincidence James had been at the coffee shop they walked past. Lucy didn't know what was going on but as she remembered where she'd seen the woman before it all clicked into place, she'd been the one in their flat the night her daddy hadn't come home.

"They're the ones that hurt you aren't they?" She asked, peering over her shoulder where she could still see them standing by the coffee shop.

"Yes sweetheart, we need to get away from here." He explained, still weaving through the shoppers and trying to work out where a good place to hide would be. Lucy kept looking behind them and watched as another two men joined James and Vicky before they all started to walk in the same direction Edward was taking them.

"They're following us Daddy." She warned and Edward glanced back to see she was right so he gave up the plan to just walk away and picked Lucy up before starting to run. He didn't know what they had planned but he couldn't risk finding out, not with Lucy with him so he pushed himself to run faster than he thought he could. He still wasn't well and it didn't take long for him to be out of breath and when he kept pushing himself his chest began to ache but he couldn't stop, not until they'd lost sight of James and his friends and a glance over his shoulder told him they were still there. Realising he couldn't keep running for much longer as he was already slowing down he crossed the street to reach a particularly dense crowd Edward took them through it and down a side street hoping they wouldn't have been able to see them leaving the main street for the crowd. Continuing on down the street it opened up onto a more residential looking street and not hearing any sign of footsteps following them Edward thought it would be safe to stop and try and get his breath back. Sitting a worried looking Lucy onto the wall outside of a large old tenement building he sat down next to her, leaning over as he tried to get his breathing under control, every breath hurt and he rubbed his chest at the feeling wondering why such a short run was making him feel so light headed.

"Daddy are you ok?" Lucy asked concerned, reaching out to place her hand on his back. He looked up at her and nodded, only that made him feel even more faint and by the look of panic that crossed Lucy's face he guessed he didn't look so good so he dropped his head down and tried to concentrate on his breathing only to end up in a painful coughing fit. He heard the door behind them open and close and started to panic as footsteps neared them, there was no way he could run any more. Whoever it was came to a stop beside them and Edward was forced to look up again when a familiar voice asked if he was ok. He was met by a pair of concerned blue eyes that showed no sign of recognition of who he was but he knew instantly who they belonged to and he wondered just how much worse his day could get.


	18. Chapter 16 Lies

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 16 – Lies<strong>

Looping his arm around Lucy's shoulders to make sure she didn't go anywhere Edward lowered his head again. He knew they weren't in any danger from the man standing in front of them but he didn't want him to recognise who he was. Of all the people he could have run into he was one of the worst possibilities right now but thankfully it appeared he had no idea who was sitting on his wall. Before Edward had chance to respond to his question the door opened again followed by the sound of hurried footsteps.

"Hey Jasper can you get some more...Edward?" He'd gotten the answer to just how much worse his day could get as Bella appeared next to the man who was the very same Jasper he'd been friends with in school and who was now dating his sister. As her gaze settled on Edward her surprise turned into worry. He still hadn't quite got his breathing back under control and the light headedness had paled him.

"You know them?" Jasper asked looking between Bella and Edward with confusion. Bella nodded in response but her attention had moved to Lucy who had been watching her dad but was now looking at Bella hopefully.

"Yeah, Lucy here is Anna's best friend." She answered Jasper before returning her attention to Lucy as it didn't look like Edward was currently able to answer anything as a nasty sounding coughing fit had taken over from his shallow breathing.

"What's happened Lucy?"

Edward's head shot up again, hoping Lucy wasn't about to answer that question. He didn't want Bella to know anything about it and he certainly didn't want Jasper to. Besides that fact he didn't want to drag anyone else into the mess his life seemed to be falling in to, if Jasper worked out just who Edward was it was only a matter of time before he told Alice all about it. He did not want his family to know anything of his life anymore. They'd lost that right a long time ago and he was determined he'd never let them in again. Lucy however was only concerned with the fact her daddy looked ill and in need of help so she had no worries at all about filling Bella in on their day so far in the hope she could make him smile again.

"The people that hurt Daddy chased us." She explained and while Bella was surprised to finally get some kind of explanation about the bruises Edward kept showing up with she was also alarmed to hear that the people who caused them were probably nearby. Jasper however had been shocked at the announcement that the guy who was obviously their age seemed to be the father of the little girl and as that sunk in he found himself staring at Edward with an unnerving feeling that he knew him. It wasn't until Edward looked right at him after feeling his stare that he finally recognised him and seeing that Edward made a move to stand up.

"Well we better get going." He muttered while turning to Lucy to take hold of her hand only she was looking up at him like he was crazy. Bella shook her head and reached out to touch his arm to get his attention.

"You're not going anywhere except inside until your breathing normally and have stopped looking so pale." She informed him before turning to Jasper who now looked liked he'd just seen a ghost. "That's ok with you right? Jasper are you ok?"

"Sure, Edward right?" He asked just to make sure he'd heard Bella right when she'd come outside. Edward just nodded and looked down in defeat. There was no way he was going to get out of this now. He was fairly sure Jasper wouldn't let him leave until having asked at least a few questions as they did use to be best friends "Edward Masen?"

Again he nodded and caught the look of disbelief that passed over Jasper's face as he looked from him to Lucy and back again. Obviously his family hadn't let anyone know what had happened when he was sixteen which came as no surprise but it did make him wonder what explanation they had given for his sudden disappearance.

"You know each other?" It was now Bella's turn to be confused while Jasper still seemed to be reeling from shock and didn't respond so Edward sighed and answered for him.

"We went to school together."

"Oh, wow. Well let's all get back inside, you can catch up in there." She tried to usher everyone in but while Lucy happily jumped off the wall to follow her Edward was still doubtful, he really did not want to spend the afternoon with his sister's boyfriend.

"Thanks but we really ought to be going. We've still got shopping to get done."

"That can wait, you don't look well and I can't let you go wandering off until I'm sure you're ok." She'd never forgive herself if she let him go now and something happened to him or Lucy. It was obvious he was in no state to be walking around and if the people who had chased him were still nearby she didn't want to see him turn up at the school gates with yet more bruises on Monday morning.

"I'm fine." He argued but this time it was Lucy who spoke up.

"No you're not." She commented not understanding why he was fighting Bella on this. He'd said Bella was nice and although she didn't know Jasper she got the feeling he wasn't someone to be afraid off. He looked friendly enough with curly dark blonde hair that fell around his face and bright blue eyes dressed in the student staple of scruffy jeans, t-shirt and a dark grey hooded top.

"Just come in for a little while and then I can drive you where you need to go." Bella tried to persuade Edward and he knew his window of escape had closed. If he left now Lucy would just worry about him and he'd been trying to avoid that and he also didn't want to annoy or upset Bella by refusing again. Resigned to doing as they said he followed Bella inside the house with Jasper trailing behind, apparently still too surprised by his appearance to say anything more yet.

Once inside what turned out to be a nice modern flat Edward was faced with another familiar face as Peter was sitting on the floor in front of a coffee table covered in notes and three laptops. He didn't look up straight away and just continued typing on his laptop.

"Did you catch him?" He asked, assuming it was just Bella back from asking Jasper to pick up some more highlighters along with the ink cartridge he'd originally left for.

"Urm yeah, I hope you don't mind but we found these two outside and we invited them in." She responded so he looked up to see what was going on.

"You remember Edward Masen right? And this is Lucy, his daughter." Jasper finally spoke up as Peter's gaze focused on Edward. He recognised the name instantly but it took a moment to find the boy they'd known in the man standing before them.

"Wow yeah, nice to see you again Edward, come sit down guys." He commented moving to sit his laptop down and stand up. Everyone found a seat with Lucy climbing onto Edward's lap while Bella sat beside them on the sofa. Jasper sat down on the chair to their right while Peter hovered by the door.

"Can I get you a drink or something?" He asked Edward, finally noticing that he didn't look so good. He nodded in response so Peter headed for the kitchen to make cups of tea for everyone.

"This is Peter and Jasper's flat. We're all in the same college class, we were working on a group presentation." Bella explained noticing Edward looking at the cluttered table, suddenly realising that it may have looked quite strange for her to have appeared with two of his school friends who by the sounds of it he hadn't seen for a long time. Edward had no idea what to say to that and no one else seemed to have any better ideas as they were left sitting in a very awkward silence until Peter returned with cups of tea and a glass of juice for Lucy. He sat down, noticed the silence and wondered what was going on.

"So...not that I'm not glad to see you, but what are you doing here Edward?" He finally asked. No one had seen or heard anything from him since his sudden vanishing act after his sixteenth birthday. It seemed a little strange for him to be sitting in their living room totally out of the blue, especially since Jasper was dating Alice and still friends with Emmett and neither of them had said anything about him being back. Edward shrugged and took a large gulp of his tea so he wouldn't have to say anything.

"Lucy said someone was chasing you?" Bella prompted, she wanted to know what was going on with him and with Lucy obviously happy to help answer questions it was probably the only chance she'd have at getting any answers out of him.

"They were just trying to scare me, we're fine." He answered. Now that he was somewhere relatively safe he could see their encounter for what it was. They hadn't been planning to hurt him, it was broad daylight in the middle of a busy street, there was no way they could have done anything without being caught. They'd chased him purely to frighten him and by running he'd let them succeed. Not only had they scared him but the left over symptoms of his flu had caused problems. If he'd just walked away calmly nothing would have happened, they'd have got their shopping done and gone home but now because he'd panicked he was trapped in a room with two people he didn't want to see and a third who'd want answers to questions he didn't want to or couldn't answer.

"Looks like they succeeded." Jasper commented, he remembered Lucy saying they were the people that had hurt her daddy and looking at him properly now it looked like he'd taken a pretty substantial beating not too long ago. "Why did they want to scare you?"

"I have no idea." Edward responded shortly causing Jasper to frown thinking that was strange but from the look on Edward's face he was wary to ask for further details.

"It's the same people who gave you those bruises right?" Bella pressed not put off by his short responses as she'd grown used to them. He nodded but glanced down to Lucy and realised she was paying attention to what they were saying giving him a perfect excuse to change the subject. She looked concerned so he smiled to her before kissing her head.

"I can't talk about this." He announced while tilting his head towards Lucy, it really wasn't a child friendly topic but Bella looked to Lucy and thought of a way to distract her.

"Lucy would you like to draw some pictures?" She asked her, they had plenty of paper and pencils strewn around the room and there were even felt tip pens they'd been using for some of the presentation plans. She knew how well drawing distracted Anna from anything else going on around her so when Lucy nodded eagerly and jumped off Edward's knee she figured they'd be ok to talk. She got Lucy settled on the floor at the far end of the room with a large stack of paper, pens and the TV turned on just in case the drawing wouldn't hold her attention.

"There, Lucy's occupied so we can talk." She stated as she returned to her seat and Edward looked longingly at Lucy wishing she hadn't been so easily distracted. He missed her comforting presence on his lap as well. He was still on edge from the chase, his chest hurt with each breath and although the sugary tea did seem to be helping the light headedness he still didn't feel great. He'd much rather have been hugging Lucy than answering unwanted questions.

"I'm still not talking about it." He muttered sullenly, they didn't need to know and they already knew as much as he could have told them anyway. Jasper, Peter and Bella all stared at him but he refused to say anything else, he just leaned back against the sofa and rubbed at his chest again wishing it would stop hurting.

"Ok then, how about telling us where you've been the last few years. Alice and Emmett have been looking for you, they've been really worried." Jasper started realising Edward's stubborn streak was kicking in. He didn't like the fact Edward was hurt but if wouldn't talk about it there was nothing they could do and after not seeing him for so long there were plenty more questions he wanted answers to. Edward scowled as his mood fell further. He knew this would come up but he didn't know what to say having no clue what they'd already been told so instead he tried to avoid answering.

"You can't tell them you've seen me." He stated.

"Edward you can't be serious. I'm dating Alice, she'd kill me if she found out I'd seen you and didn't tell her. I can't lie to her." Jasper argued, totally thrown by the fact Edward would be trying to hide from them.

"Well she's obviously been lying to you so you shouldn't feel bad about it." He countered speaking before he'd realised what he was saying. He hadn't meant to make them question Alice or Emmett but by the look on Jasper face he knew he had.

"What do you mean?"

"They already found me yet they obviously haven't bothered to fill you in on that." He replied, this was going so wrong already. He wished he could just keep his mouth shut but it seemed to have other ideas.

"When?" Jasper couldn't believe that Alice wouldn't have told him. He'd been helping them search for Edward, tracking down mutual friends to ask if anyone had heard from him lately. They'd also never mentioned Edward having a daughter and it was making him wonder what had actually happened and if anything they'd been told about Edward was actually true. From the way Edward was answering his questions there seemed to be a lot of anger there and he'd always been close to his siblings. None of it made any sense.

"Last weekend." Edward answered which meant Alice and Emmett must have known about Lucy. At least it explained why Alice had been acting strange that weekend, cancelling their plans at the last minute with no explanation and then missing her usual energy for the rest of the week.

"This doesn't make any sense. They've been insistent with looking for you, why wouldn't they tell us when they found you." Jasper wondered out loud, it was so out of character for everyone involved.

"I'm guessing there's a lot they haven't told you considering the way you looked when you realised Lucy was mine." Edward added, he didn't want to ruin things for Alice but his anger at his family was taking away his usual filters and he had the horrible urge to just tell them everything. Jasper and Peter obviously thought Emmett and Alice had done nothing wrong and were just trying to find their lost brother. He was finding it highly annoying that they were coming off like they were the victims in the whole mess, that he'd just run off without telling anyone making them all worry. He wanted to let them in on what his family was actually like but Bella was sitting there next to him listening avidly to everything that was being said and he didn't know if he wanted her to know what had happened. He didn't want her to decide his parents were right or to look at him with pity.

"When you left your family told everyone you took up an offer from your aunt to go and stay with her in America." Peter said slowly, watching Edward for his reaction and was surprised when he actually laughed, although he didn't really look amused. They'd all been close friends in school and it had taken everyone by surprise that Edward had just left without telling anyone or saying goodbye. With what he'd said so far is was looking like something entirely different had happened.

"I didn't even know I had an aunt in America." Edward commented, he didn't know if it was just another lie or if he actually did have an aunt. His parents had never really talked much about family and he'd just assumed neither of them had any brothers or sisters.

"So you didn't go to America?" Peter questioned. Edward shuck his head before sitting up straight and rubbing a hand across his face. He had never expected them to tell anyone the truth but that was just absurd.

"No, I've been here the whole time. What exactly have my family been telling everyone?" He was curious to know how Emmett and Alice had explained their sudden decision to track him down if they told everyone he'd gone to stay with his aunt.

"They said you stayed with your aunt until you finished school then went off travelling and they lost contact with you." Jasper explained, now wondering how they'd never questioned any of it. The Edward they'd known would never have lost contact with them, not without a good reason and now he thought about it neither Alice nor Emmett had every actually explained why he'd left so suddenly or lost contact.

"Wow that's quite the life I've been living. Shame they didn't bother to tell me about it." Edward muttered, he wasn't sure which was more ridiculous, the story his family had come up with to hide what they'd really done or the fact his so called best friends had believed it. If that had really been what had happened he would have stayed in contact and told everyone what he was doing. It sounded quite exciting, not something you'd hide. It actually hurt that they apparently had all believed it as it showed it wasn't just his family who had a low opinion of him if his friends believed he could have left like that.

"What happened then? Why did you leave?" Peter asked and Edward felt the hold on his anger snap. He hadn't left and he was sick of being made out to be the bad guy. In that moment he didn't care that Bella was still sitting there, or what it would do to Alice and Jasper's relationship he just wanted Jasper and Peter to know what his family, that they thought so much of, was actually like.

"I didn't leave, they chucked me out. I never went to America or travelling. I've spent the last five years right here, struggling to make ends meet and looking after Lucy." That declaration was met by wide eyes and a shocked silence from everyone. Edward fidgeted in his seat wondering if he'd be able to slip out with Lucy now that they all seemed so stunned but just as he was going to get up Jasper found his voice.

"Why would they do that? Your family's always seemed so close."

Edward just looked pointedly at Lucy and they all understood although it left Jasper and Peter with even more questions. They'd been assuming she'd been a result of something happening shortly after his move to America, but if he'd never gone to America and she was in fact the reason he'd been chucked out her mother had to have been someone they knew. Edward could tell what they were trying to work out as they both looked to Lucy but he was certain they wouldn't be able to figure it out considering he hadn't known anything about her until the night she'd been given to him.

"That's horrible." Bella commented quietly oblivious to the questions Jasper and Peter now had and absolutely horrified that someone's parents could do that. It was no wonder he came across as stand offish when she'd first spoken to him. It also explained why he always looked so tired, he'd obviously meant it when he'd said it was just him and Lucy when she'd asked if they still lived at home. She'd assumed he'd have family around somewhere for support even if they lived alone but that apparently wasn't the case. She couldn't imagine how hard things must have been for him, she was pretty sure if the same thing had happened to her she wouldn't have been able to cope. As it was her and Renee often had trouble juggling work, college and looking after Anna and that was between two of them, it must have been a hundred times worse for Edward. He really was amazing.

"Why didn't you tell any of us?" Peter eventually asked, babies didn't just appear and he couldn't figure out how or why Edward would have hidden it. He usually told them when something was bothering him and he couldn't even remember if Edward had been acting strangely at the time or not, surely there should have been something they should have picked up with an event this life changing occurring.

"I didn't know until it was already happening and I wasn't really thinking all that clearly at the time. By the time I was I couldn't face being turned away again, if my own parent's didn't want anything to do with me it wasn't likely anyone else would." He answered leaving them all speechless again. Bella's heart actually ached for him, he must have been so alone and she couldn't stand to think of him lost like that. It was making her even more determined to be around for him now. Whether he liked it or not he'd found himself a friend and she wouldn't stand by and let him continue the way he apparently had been managing so far. Anna and Lucy were going to be having a lot of play dates and she had a large selection of recipes that she could teach him while they played. It was clear from what little he'd said and the empty look in his eyes that after the people he'd trusted most to be there for him had turned their backs on him he'd closed himself off from everyone else to avoid feeling that pain again and that was just no way to live.

"We'd have tried to help if you'd told us. I can't believe Alice and Emmett kept all this hidden. I'm sorry Edward." Jasper finally said, he really couldn't believe how much Alice had lied about. He thought they had a rock solid relationship but if she'd lied about this and hadn't even tried to help her brother she wasn't the girl he'd believed her to be and as for Emmett, he was half inclined to punch him the next time he saw him. They should have told them and they all should have been looking for him as soon as he'd left. He couldn't understand how they could have just stood by and let it all happen and why it had taken them so long to start trying to find him.

"It's not their fault, they couldn't do anything. Once Dad has made up his mind about something that's it which is why you can't tell them you've seen me. I know Alice especially just wants to help but I can't let them be dragged into this. They still live at home and I don't want to cause trouble for them. Me and Luce are fine by ourselves." Edward responded suddenly feeling guilty about what he'd said. He couldn't believe what he'd just done and leant forward to rest his elbows on his knees with his head in his hands before tugging at his hair in frustration, He knew none of what had happened was Alice or Emmett's fault. At the time Alice had only been fourteen and Emmett eighteen. There was nothing either of them could have done. He didn't like how they'd lied about what had happened to him, or how Emmett had convinced him into going back just for it to all go horribly wrong again but that didn't mean he wanted to destroy their friendships with Jasper and Peter. He hated how talking about all this made him feel, on one hand he wanted to be angry at everyone for what had happened, but on the other he knew it was no one's fault but his own and he felt guilty for being angry. He needed to get out of there before he made it worse and so he could stop thinking about it all.

"They still should have told us." Jasper muttered but he guessed he had a point. They were all just kids when it had originally happened, none of them would have been much help to him but it didn't have to stay that way. "At least we know now I guess. We're here if you need us and it'd be great to get to know Lucy."

"Yeah, you're welcome to come round whenever you like." Peter agreed but Edward just shook his head.

"You don't get it. I can't stay in contact with my family, and you very much are. You've already said you don't want to lie to Alice and Emmett. There's no way I can stay in touch. Even if I could, I can't drag anyone else into whatever the hell is going on right now. It wouldn't be fair so thank you for letting us come in to calm down but we really do have to go, and I can't stay in touch. I'm sorry but it's just too hard and I can't live like that." He hated to say it as he'd missed his friends almost as much as his family but they were just too closely connected and he couldn't live on the outskirts of his family like that. He wouldn't be able to stand hearing about Alice and Emmett and not being able to see them and the idea of making Jasper lie to Alice like that was unthinkable. As a onetime occurrence it was necessary but if it happened regularly and Alice found out she would be devastated and he couldn't be responsible for that. With that he stood and called to Lucy who scrambled up from the floor and went straight to him, a smile in place that fell as she saw the dejected look on his face. That hadn't been the expression she'd been hoping for.

"Daddy are you ok?" She asked unsurely.

"I'm fine sweetheart. It's time to go so say goodbye to everyone." She waved to Jasper and Peter before looking to Bella confused, she was meant to have made her daddy smile and instead she was sitting there looking just as confused as Lucy felt. With one last wave from Lucy and a muttered goodbye from Edward he finally made his escape leading Lucy out of the flat, ignoring Jasper and Peter's calls to stay and figure out a way to stay in touch.

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><p>"Edward wait!"<p>

They hadn't gotten far when they heard a door slam and Bella calling out to them. Knowing it would be rude to ignore her since she hadn't done anything wrong or asked any upsetting questions Edward stopped walking and turned to face the way they had just come. Bella was hurrying towards them still in the process of pulling her jacket on, her heavy messenger bag hanging off one arm. Realising he'd done as she'd asked she covered the remaining space between them before dropping her bag so she could get her coat on.

"I said I'd give you a lift and I meant it. My cars just a little further down the street." She explained lifting her bag over her head. Edward continued to stare at her wondering why she was bothering and acting like nothing had just happened. She seemed to keep appearing when he needed help even when he wouldn't admit that fact to himself and he couldn't understood why she cared or made the effort to go out of her way for him. Seeing he wasn't making any attempt to move and she'd now got her bag and coat sorted she sighed and grabbed his free hand as she starting walking again, forcing him and Lucy go with her.

"Come on, I'll take you to the supermarket then drive you home. I need to pick up a few things for dinner anyway." She commented and he was so bemused by her grip on his hand that he didn't argue as they reached her mini and got in.

As they drove Edward wasn't quite sure where they were going but Bella seemed to know so he watched Lucy in the rear view mirror playing with a Barbie doll that Bella had spotted on the back seat as she'd help Lucy buckle in. The day really hadn't gone to plan and he didn't know what to make of it. He'd been living in the area for almost five years and had never run into anyone he'd known before, and now in one day he'd managed to walk straight into James and stumble into Jasper and Peter who Bella turned out to know. He knew there was a high chance they'd end up saying something to Alice and Emmett but then again it might not even matter considering they knew where he lived now and neither of them had tried to talk to him since he'd left their house. Maybe they had actually listened to him or their father had had words with them. His thoughts were interrupted by another painful coughing fit and Bella glanced across to see him wincing and rubbing at his chest again.

"Have you seen a doctor about that?" She asked, he seemed to put everyone else before himself and she wouldn't have been surprised if he neglected his own health in the process.

"I'm fine, I just wasn't ready for running anywhere." He brushed it off making her frown.

"You know you're not fooling anyone, have you looked in a mirror recently? You don't look fine." He didn't respond to that, he was sure the cough would be gone in a couple of days and so long as he didn't try running anywhere he'd be ok. He was more concerned about what would happen if Jasper told Alice he'd seen him.

"Do you think Jasper and Peter will tell Alice and Emmett?" He asked thinking Bella might have a little more insight into how they'd react considering he hadn't seen them in years and she seemed to be friends with them now.

"I don't know, they were pretty concerned about you." She answered as she'd noticed the look on Jasper's face when Edward had revealed what had really happened to him, he'd looked angry and that was something she'd never seen from him before. She knew he'd try to keep quiet about it for the sake of his relationship with Alice but she wasn't sure he'd succeed. He was a very loyal friend and it sounded like he and Edward had been close in school.

"Alice and Emmett are your brother and sister right?" She asked as no one had actually said it outright.

"Yeah."

"Would it really be so bad then if they did know?" If they'd been looking for him then surely that had to mean they wanted to be part of his life again. She didn't see why that was such a bad thing, if he'd been on his own for so long surely having some family around would have been nice. Edward sighed and shuck his head.

"That night you picked me and Lucy up from the bench was the result of our last reunion." He told her as there wasn't an easy explanation as to why he didn't want them around. Sometimes it didn't even make sense to him but he knew he couldn't go through that again and there was no way to avoid it for as long as they were still with their parents. Bella had already heard enough that adding some more details to the mess his life had turned into wouldn't make much difference to how she saw him now. He was pretty sure she'd remember the state he'd been in as he'd been embarrassed enough that it must have been bad and hopefully that would be enough to convince her he really didn't want his family getting involved in his life without having to answer any more questions.

"Ah, I guess I can see why you'd want to avoid that." She responded, she could remember all too well just how upset he'd been that night. "There's no point worrying over it now though, you don't know if Jasper will say anything or not and there's nothing you can do either way."

"I guess. I wish I hadn't said anything, I should have just gone along with what they'd been told. It was just how farfetched the whole thing was and I'm so sick of everyone's misconceptions of me." He sank further down into the seat and ran a hand through his hair out of frustration. Just thinking about what all his old friends must have thought of him thanks to his family's lies was enough to make him furious but it felt strangely good to be voicing these thoughts to someone. It had been a long time since there had been anyone he could talk to and it was the most open he'd been by choice with anyone recently. Bella didn't seem to be judging him and it was helping to keep him calm.

"I think you did the right thing. They should have known from the start and it's not your fault Alice and Emmett chose to lie to their friends."

"It wouldn't have made any difference if they had known. I hope I haven't ruined things for Alice." He sighed thinking about how happy she'd looked when she'd told him about Jasper. There wasn't any point in them all being miserable; he should have just kept quiet and left. It wasn't like it even mattered what they thought of him when they weren't going to be in his life.

"I've met Alice a couple of times. I don't think anything could get in her and Jasper's way for long." Bella commented carefully. She didn't want Edward worrying about things he couldn't control and weren't his fault but she didn't think talking about his family would help him much. She hated the thought of how he must have felt hearing what had been said about him and she was still trying to get her head around everything she'd learned that afternoon. She'd met Jasper and Peter at college and after being grouped together for a couple of projects in their first year they'd all stayed friends. Whenever they went out for drinks after college or had the occasional weekend get together Alice was often there with Jasper and now she thought about it she had heard them talking about Alice's missing brother. It was strange to think she'd been seeing Edward almost every weekday for the last seven months with no idea who he was while her friends had been looking for him. Alice had always seemed nice although a little too excitable but Bella had never really talked to her much as they had very little in common. While Bella was into books and keeping a pretty low profile, Alice was into fashion and always seemed to be the centre of attention. Bella had never met Emmett but had heard a few stories about him, most of which had come from Jasper and Peter when reliving some of the sillier stunts that had been pulled in their school days. He'd come off as sounding irresponsible and a bit of a player, not the type of person she'd have ever cared to know and having now heard how he'd done nothing to help his brother when he'd needed him she hoped she wouldn't ever meet him. She could see plenty of reasons as to why Edward wouldn't want them involved in his life anymore but it was obvious from the pain in his eyes when they were mentioned that he still cared about them a great deal.

Unaware of what was going on in Bella's head Edward decided to do as she said and try to stop worrying over things he couldn't change. He glanced back to the rear view mirror to check on Lucy and she looked up from the doll she'd been undressing and caught his gaze so smiled before concentrating on the doll again. Content that Lucy seemed happy enough and oblivious to his and Bella's conversation his thoughts drifted back to James and his friends. Jasper and Peter had distracted him from it but he'd learnt two of their names which ought to have given him some clue as to who they were and how he knew them but it didn't. He couldn't remember anyone called James or Vicky. There may have been a couple of James' at their school but he hadn't really known any of them and he was almost certain there had been no one called Vicky at all. He probably should have asked Jasper and Peter if they remembered anyone but that would have lead to more questions and he couldn't have risked telling them anything that would result in getting Lucy hurt so he'd just have to hope he remembered something useful soon.

Bella pulled into the supermarket car park and they split up to get their shopping done before meeting back up at her car and Bella drove them home despite Edward's insistence that they would be fine and she didn't have to. The journey home had been full of light chit chat with Lucy joining in from the back seat wanting to know what Anna had been up to all weekend. Bella happily answered her questions and by the time they were stopped in front of the flat block the awkward atmosphere of the afternoon had been well left behind and replaced by smiles. As they climbed out of the car Bella had invited them over for dinner the following day which Edward had accepted much to Lucy's delight. When they got inside Lucy helped Edward put away their shopping and handed him a folded up piece of note paper with his name written neatly across it that she'd found in one of the bags. He'd taken it a little confused as to what it was only to open it and see a phone number and a short message from Bella written on it. Lucy watched him stare at it for a minute, a slight frown marring his face before he shook his head and shoved the paper into his pocket making her wonder what it was. He didn't say anything about it though and after spending the rest of the day playing together, by the time Lucy was all tucked up in bed she'd completely forgotten about it.

With Lucy safely out the way Edward sank down onto the sofa and pulled the note that had been on his mind all evening out of his pocket to stare at again. It felt wrong and awkward to have it and he was glad she'd just slipped it into one of their bags without saying anything. He didn't know what to make of it, it was wrong in so many ways and he felt bad accepting it but she wanted him to have it and that thought alone made him want to smile. He knew he was bad for her, even as a friend what with James being around. He didn't know what he wanted, or what lengths he'd go to for his revenge so being friends with anyone was just endangering them and he didn't have a lot to offer anyone anyway. He wasn't very good company, all his spare time had to be spent with a five year old and he found it too hard to trust anyone for them to really get to know him. Bella though already knew more about him than anyone else, didn't seem to mind hanging out with five year olds and had some magic way of getting him to talk to her. He'd had to give up pretty much everything that made him smile except Lucy and he found he really didn't want to have to add Bella to that list. Sighing he ran a hand through his hair, eyes still glued to the note before he sat up straight and dug his mobile out of his pocket. After saving the number into his address book he stood and added it to the list of numbers by the land line before taking the note and putting it in the shoe box he kept under his bed. That night he went to bed and fell asleep with the words printed on the note still floating around his head.

_"Just in case you need a friend."_


	19. Chapter 17 Warning

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 17 - Warning<strong>

Edward woke up the next morning, rolled over onto his front and buried his face into his pillow. He didn't want to get up, he'd been having a nice dream, it hadn't been anything spectacular, just an evening spent watching TV with Bella and Lucy but there had been smiles, giggles and easy conversations so it was a great improvement on his nightmares. It was a Monday though, Lucy had school and he had work so he had to get up. He groaned before flopping back onto his back knowing that he couldn't go back to sleep and even if he did the nice dream probably wouldn't be there anyway so he reluctantly pulled himself out of bed and stumbled his way to the bathroom.

The shower woke him up properly and as the hot water beat down on him he realised the aches and pains he'd grown used to had vanished. Cheered by the thought he was finally getting better he hurried through his shower and once dressed headed to the kitchen for his cup of coffee. As he leant against the units sipping from his mug he remembered they were meant to be going round to Bella's after school and after the initial smile that thought caused he felt a fluttering of nerves. She wanted to be friends with him and not just for the sake of the girls and he wasn't sure how to respond to that. He hoped he wouldn't get flustered when faced with her again as he knew he'd retreat back to being closed off and he really didn't want to do that. She'd gone out of her way several times to help them and he didn't want to repay that by being rude just because the thought of trying to be friends with her made him nervous. The fact she vaguely knew his sister and was friends with Jasper and Peter was also a slight problem. She seemed to understand why he didn't want them involved in his life though and he had the impression that anything he said to her would remain between just the two of them but he'd still have to be cautious. He wanted to trust her but that would take time.

Coffee finished it was time to go and wake Lucy so he got her glass of milk out and headed for her room. She was still fast asleep when he entered so he put the glass down on the chest of drawers by her bed then leant down to kiss her forehead.

"Time to wake up baby." She stirred at the sound of his voice and he stroked her hair away from her face as she opened her eyes. Edward couldn't help but smile as she blearily looked up at him; she was so adorable when sleepy. After giving her a hug he left her to get dressed and went back to the kitchen to sort out breakfast. The loaf of bread caught his eyes as he took out Lucy's breakfast cereal so he took it out as well to make himself some toast. It seemed his appetite was back and knew he ought to have been making more of an effort to eat anyway. When Lucy entered the kitchen she was happy to see him having breakfast for once and joined him at the table to eat her own. Five minutes later and she was quizzing him on which toys she could take with her to Anna's house and after limiting her to just a couple of dolls she hurriedly finished her breakfast so she could get them packed into her school bag.

On their walk to school Lucy turned her questioning to what he and Bella were going to do that afternoon. That stumped him as he hadn't really thought too much about it but then he remembered Bella had suggested she could teach him to cook so he offered that up and noticed the way Lucy was studying him with a furrowed brow as she thought about it.

"That sounds fun." She finally decided, "I liked the pasta she made last time."

"Yeah I did too." He agreed and that look was back in her eyes suggesting she was plotting something. It wasn't until they'd reached the school gates and Lucy had immediately dropped his hand to go and hug Bella that he figured out what Lucy was up to. She was trying to set him up with Bella. That was slightly terrifying but at least she had good taste and it was slightly amusing to him that she'd try to do that. Intrigued as to where she'd go with it he decided to pretend he hadn't noticed and leave her to it although he'd maybe warn Bella in case Lucy roped Anna in to help.

Bella greeted Edward with a smile which he returned once Lucy had let go of her and finished saying her goodbyes to him. He didn't know what to say to her, whether or not to mention the number she'd left for him or apologise for the hassle he'd caused the day before. She could have talked to Jasper once she got home and he'd no doubt have loads of stories to tell about him and that thought made him feel sick. What if she'd rethought being friends with him after having time to really think about everything that had been said yesterday? He could feel himself doing exactly what he'd hoped he wouldn't do that morning as he shoved his hands in his pockets and stared at his feet.

"Hey, you guys are still coming round tonight right?" Bella asked, watching Edward's demeanour changing from light hearted and happy from his interactions with Lucy to closed off. She didn't know what had caused it but she hoped it wasn't her. She hadn't meant to make him feel awkward by giving him her number which was why she'd hidden it in their shopping bags but she'd wanted him to know she was there if he needed someone. His head jerked back up as she spoke and she saw the surprise in his eyes which only made her more concerned as to what he'd been thinking that had closed him off.

"Yeah, we're looking forward to it." He admitted quietly and Bella was pleased to see a shaky smile form on his face.

"Great! I've got to get going, have to be in college early to finish the presentation we were working on yesterday but I'll see you tonight." She really did have to get moving but she regretted mentioning why when Edward's smile fell and he started to look worried.

"I'm sorry for interrupting you guys yesterday." He commented and she silently cursed herself for being so stupid. She was really going to have to work on not just blurting out whatever came to mind around him. It either made her sound like an idiot or made him feel bad neither of which she wanted to happen.

"No it wasn't your fault and there's not much left to do anyway. Don't worry about it and have a good day, I'll see you later ok?" She responded wishing his smile would reappear but he just continued to look at her warily, like he expected her to be angry with him or take back the invitation to come over. He mumbled a good bye to which she smiled brightly trying to reassure him but he just waved and turned to leave since the school bell had rung whilst they'd been talking. She left as well wishing she knew how to stop him being so skittish around her. It was easy to see why he would be given what she'd learned about his family but she didn't want him to be like that with her and wondered if maybe getting him to talk later on would help. He had to know that she didn't agree with what his family had done and that she really did want to be there for him but she didn't know how to do that without scaring him away.

Edward walked to work feeling nervous and jumpy making him wish he hadn't eaten breakfast. No one seemed to be following him that morning but as they'd proven before the quiet streets he walked along were a perfect place to ambush him. He was relieved to step through the shops doors and be met by a smiling Garrett no less worse for wear than when he'd left the flat. As Garrett asked him how his weekend went he was careful to leave out the conflict with James and resulting meeting with Jasper, Peter and Bella. Garrett seemed pleased to hear nothing untoward had happened and commented that it was good to see him looking well again before leaving him to get to work.

The morning was spent sorting out all the new releases and shelving them which kept Edward happily busy as it was one of his favourite aspects of the job. Things slowed down in the afternoon though and as he sat behind the counter absentmindedly flicking through a few of the new album releases in the CD player his thoughts drifted to Bella. He felt terrible about interrupting them with their college work. When she'd followed him out of the flat he'd assumed the work they'd been doing was finished or at least not due in straight away but if she had to go into college early to get it finished then it must have been due that day. He was surprised she wasn't annoyed with him yet she'd shown no signs of it. She'd be spending the morning with Jasper and Peter as well which made him wonder if she'd ask whether they'd mentioned him to Alice or not. He kind of hoped she did so he'd at least know what to expect but he didn't want to be a topic of conversation between them. Bella was bound to be curious considering how little she actually knew about him so the temptation to ask them about his school days would most likely be strong. He knew there was nothing there that was that bad other than what had happened with Lucy's mother which no one else knew about but if they'd so easily believed his family's lies he wasn't sure how much of people's misconceptions of him they actually thought were true. He'd always thought Jasper understood him better than most and had seen through everyone else's perceptions of him but now he wasn't sure and he didn't want Bella to see him as that person. Everyone back at school had seen him as Emmett's little brother and a lot of his reputation had been passed down to him whether it was justified or not. He hadn't minded too much at the time as people left him alone and it didn't really cause any problems for him until Lucy came along but it wasn't who he was then and it definitely wasn't who he'd become.

Thankfully a wave of customers came in effectively distracting him from his worrying and he didn't get a chance to think about it again until he was on his way to the school. By the time he'd reached the gates not only was he feeling jumpy and paranoid that James and his friends were watching him but he'd also managed to convince himself that Bella would have talked to Jasper and Peter and now not want anything to do with him.

Bella watched Edward approach from her usual waiting spot outside the gates. He was glancing around a lot as he walked which made her wonder if the people who had chased him were nearby. He looked very on edge but when he spotted her he looked like he wanted to bolt which made no sense. She waved and smiled to him as he got closer and he smiled weakly in return before letting his gaze fall to the ground.

"Hey, you ok?" She asked as he finally came to a stop beside her. It looked like whatever had been bothering him in the morning was still there as he just nodded.

"How did your presentation go?" He eventually asked after they'd stood in an awkward silence for a couple of minutes.

"Really well actually, thanks for asking." She responded enthusiastically and he finally seemed to relax a little. She really hoped he hadn't been worrying about that all day but before she could say anything else the bell rang. The girls soon found them and they were bouncing around so much that Edward wouldn't have been surprised if they'd consumed and entire bag of sugar each. Bella was staring at them totally overwhelmed as the pair shouted over each other trying to tell them about school and Edward got the impression she'd never been exposed to more than one over excited child at a time. Luckily for her he'd grown used to it at his time in the crèche and he enjoyed seeing Lucy happy like that.

"Hey girls calm down." He stepped into the middle of them and ruffled Lucy's hair effectively shutting her up while Anna quietened down to stare up at him as well. "Now one at a time tell us what you wanted to say so we can actually understand you."

Lucy looked suitably apologetic for being over loud and reached out to hug him while Anna took the lead on telling them all about school. As they walked to Bella's house she was amazed at how well Edward was managing to keep both girls attention without either of them getting too excited. They were both obviously hyper but he was fielding their energy perfectly without any help from her. She was glad he was there and she hadn't agreed to take Lucy without him around as she knew if she'd been on her own with both of them she'd have been pulling out her own hair in frustration having no idea how to deal with them. By the time they reached the house the girls had managed to calm down having run off some of their energy on the walk and having talked off the rest with Edward. With one last glance to Edward and a kiss on the check from Lucy the girls charged off to Anna's room leaving Bella and Edward on their own in the kitchen.

"I'm so glad you were there for that." Bella said as she put the kettle on. She was exhausted just from watching them but when she looked to Edward she found he was smiling.

"They weren't that bad." He commented and she couldn't help but laugh.

"Are you sure about that? I don't think they could get any more hyper."

"Oh I'm sure they could. It's good fun though." He loved seeing a happy Lucy and he didn't mind dealing with over excited children. After his disastrous first week with Lucy had settled down and he'd figured out what he was doing he had discovered he had a natural talent for dealing with children as it wasn't just Lucy that responded well to him but the children in the crèche as well. It had turned out to be extremely useful as he'd never had much trouble with the children there and it looked like Anna was the same.

"Hmm I'll take your word for it. Tea?" He nodded so she busied herself with that before joining him at the table. He seemed more comfortable around her now and she was glad the girls had managed to put him at ease. He'd taken his jacket off and hung it on the back of his chair which drew her attention to the t-shirt he was wearing. What she assumed was a band logo used to cover the front but it was half worn off so she couldn't really tell what it had been not that it mattered as the fabric was thin enough that it did nothing to disguise what was underneath it. It was a closer fit than the ones she'd seen him in before, showing off his lean build and although he looked as though he could have done with gaining a little weight she still liked what she saw. She wanted to reach out and run a hand down his chest, see if the fabric of his t-shirt was as soft as it appeared. Trying to rid herself of that notion she remembered what she'd wanted to talk to him about while idly wondering if his shirt was so well worn from love or necessity.

"I spoke to Jasper today." She started and saw him visibly tense at the mention of his name so she was quick to sooth him. "He hasn't said anything to Alice about yesterday."

"Oh, that's good." He sighed in relief before picking up his tea to take a sip.

"Yeah, he asked about you though so I told him you were ok." She continued watching as he sat his mug back down and ran a hand through his hair while glaring at the table top.

"Did he say anything else?" He asked quietly, he had to know if they'd told her anything so he'd know where he stood. She shook her head.

"No and I wouldn't ask him to." She responded. It was easy to tell what he was worried about but she didn't want to learn about him from other people. He'd said he was tired of people's misconceptions of him and she didn't want them to taint the fragile friendship she was trying to build with him. She'd wait to hear what he wanted her to know from him, that way he'd learn to trust her and she'd get the truth.

"Thank you." He mumbled awkwardly, more grateful than she could ever know for that simple declaration. They moved onto lighter topics after that ending up discussing some of the new releases Edward had taken a liking to while working but they were soon interrupted by the thumping on the stairs that announced the arrival of Anna and Lucy on the hunt for an afternoon snack. While Bella got up to get them juice and biscuits Anna sat down in the chair next to Bella's and Lucy went over to Edward rather than one of the empty chairs so he picked her up and let her sit on his knee. Bella sat the glasses of juice and a cookie jar on the table so Edward reached across for Lucy's glass and handed it to her while she picked up a biscuit from the jar. Anna, who rather liked the biscuits was already on her second one as Bella sat down in the chair opposite Edward's and retrieved her mug of tea before noticing Anna.

"No more now, you won't eat your tea." She warned causing Anna to scowl slightly but she did as Bella said and left the biscuits alone, picking up her glass of juice instead.

"What have you guys been up to?" Edward asked Lucy causing her to take her attention away from her drink and look up at him, a smile clear across her face.

"Dolls." She told him happily so Edward smiled back and stroked her hair out of her face. Taking advantage of the fact Bella was watching Edward and Lucy, Anna edged closer to the biscuits again but was thwarted when Edward suddenly looked up from Lucy to her and the movement caught Bella's attention.

"I said no more biscuits." She reminded Anna before getting up and putting them away. Anna watched them go with a scowl on her face before looking back at Lucy who had now finished her drink and seemed perfectly happy cuddling with Edward. He noticed Anna's stare though so kissed Lucy's head then lifted her down off his knee.

"Why don't you go and play again?" He suggested so Lucy looked to Anna who nodded eagerly and jumped off her seat before answering Edward.

"Ok, what are you going to do?" She asked looking between him and Bella who was now leaning against the units watching them all. She'd noticed her dad's changing moods and right now he appeared happy so she didn't want that to change again.

"He's going to help me cook dinner." Bella answered for them and Lucy smiled remembering that Edward had mentioned that in the morning. She looked back to him to check he was still happy with that idea and when she saw he was smiling too decided it was ok to leave him. She'd been worried that they'd end up having the adult conversations that resulted in him being angry or upset like the day before. She wanted them to get on well, she liked it when Bella made him smile and she was pretty sure she wouldn't mind sharing his attention with her too much. Happy that all was well she finally followed Anna out of the kitchen.

"Is Lucy ok?" Bella asked once they'd left wondering why she'd lingered like that. She'd been perfectly happy following Anna the last time they'd visited.

"I think so, possibly worrying about me. I should probably warn you though, I think she's trying to set us up so she might rope Anna in to help." He answered, studiously staring into his now empty mug which Bella was glad about as the thought of being set up with Edward wasn't unappealing and thinking about it made her blush.

"Oh, I'll watch out for it then." And possibly encourage it she added in her head. "I guess we should make a start on dinner. Is lasagne ok with you and Lucy?"

"Sure, what do you want me to do?"

"How's your chopping skills?" She answered with a smile pulling out a chopping board, knife and onion for him. He stood and joined her at the units and while she finished getting all the ingredients they needed out he started chopping. Bella left carrots and mushrooms beside him before getting a pan out to cook the mince. Once he'd finished chopping everything Bella had given him he carefully carried the full chopping board over to her. She thanked him before adding the onions and carrots to the pan and he retreated back a few paces to lean against the units as he watched her.

"What would you and Lucy usually be doing on a Monday evening?" Bella asked trying to start up a conversation as she added the mushrooms to the pan and continued to stir it. They'd been working in silence as they both concentrated on what they were doing but now Edward had finished chopping all the vegetables she figured they were safe to chat.

"We'd usually just get her homework done then watch TV or play." He answered quite enjoying being able to watch her with a valid reason as she was meant to be teaching him how to cook. He tried not to admit to himself that he wasn't so much paying attention to what she was doing but more how she looked while doing it. She'd got her hair tied up again and he'd come to the conclusion he liked it like that, her face was more open that way and it exposed her delicate neck. She was wearing a dark blue button up shirt in place of her usual t-shirts and it showed just a hint of her collar bones which he was oddly fascinated by. She made him think things he'd never thought about before and he didn't really understand why she affected him that way when no one else ever had. It had always been easy to keep his distance as he simply hadn't been interested by anyone else but as he'd always suspected it was different with Bella. He knew he shouldn't but he wanted to get to know her and the strange thoughts she inspired just intrigued him even more. There was a thrill of excitement trying to push through his usual fears.

"Do you ever do anything just for you?" Bella asked glancing across to him and noticing how his gaze seemed to be focused somewhere around her throat with a look of distracted confusion. It made her feel self conscious and as always a slight blush covered her cheeks. Her words seemed to shake him from his thoughts though as his gaze jerked back up to her face before moving to the contents of the pan she was stirring as he shrugged.

"I like spending time with Lucy." He wasn't sure he liked where this line of questioning was going but if they were going to be spending time with each other and he was trying to make his first real attempt at being friends in years then she'd have to know a little about his life eventually.

"I know and I like spending time with Anna but it's nice to go out or just spend some time by myself reading or something. Surely it's exhausting never getting a break?" Bella continued and having added the chopped tomatoes and seasoning to the mince it gave her a chance to turn to face Edward again while it simmered so she could see his reaction. She saw the way his shoulders hunched briefly as he shuffled uncomfortably before his face blanked and he slouched back against the units apparently having fought his natural reaction to close down to anything too personal.

"I guess." He answered slowly, "But she's worth it and when she goes to bed it's just me and to be honest I'd prefer to be playing dolls or dealing with tantrums over how hard her reading book is."

"No hobbies or anything then?" She tried, there had to be something he enjoyed that wasn't Lucy related. Hopefully once they got to know each other a little better they'd be able to spend some time hanging out without the girls around. She was sure Renee would happily look after Lucy for a day at weekends considering how much Anna liked having her over and it would be nice to have some idea of the kinds of things he'd enjoy doing.

"Not really, nothing that would be feasible now anyway." He answered thinking about the things he used to enjoy. He just didn't have the money or opportunity for them anymore. He'd never realised how much he'd depended on his family's money until he'd been cut off from it. That had been a hard lesson he'd had to learn extremely fast.

"What did you used to like doing?" Bella pushed as although he was actually answering her questions she still wasn't really learning anything.

"I played piano." He answered; it had been the only thing he'd really enjoyed while at school. All his friends had been more into sports but although he was good at them he'd never really been that interested, he'd always preferred hiding away in the music rooms.

"Wow, are you any good? I always wanted to play an instrument but I'm not very musical." It wasn't something she could suggest they spent a day doing but it was interesting and it revealed a little more about him. Considering his current job and enthusiasm for it, it appeared music was important to him and they could maybe do something with that as there were always clubs or gigs to go to.

"Urm I guess so. Alice and my mum used to like listening to me play." He answered and she could see the sadness clouding his eyes the instant he mentioned his family. It seemed to overtake any joy the memories of the music could have given him.

"You really miss them don't you?" She commented unable to let the observation go and he shrugged.

"I'm trying hard not to." The pain in his voice made it very evident that he wasn't succeeding and Bella hated it.

"There's no chance things could be sorted out between you all?" She was still finding it difficult to get her head around the idea of his family turning their back on him like they had. She'd seen no evidence of any type of behaviour in him that would justify it, sure he'd made a mistake with Lucy's mother but he seemed to have dealt with it well since and there was nothing in his character so far that she could see someone disliking so strongly. He was a hard working, loving father and she was getting to know him as a shy, selfless man, surely his family should have been proud of him.

"Not after the last time no." He answered and though he was quick to blank his expression she still caught the flash of a grimace as he thought about it.

"What happened? You don't have to answer if you don't want to." She asked unsure as to whether that was pushing things too far or not. All their previous conversations had been short and stunted or light hearted meaningless topics. They'd never really touched on anything too personal until now and she'd seen how awkward Edward had been the day before talking to Jasper and Peter. She was expecting him to clam up at any moment.

"You really want to know?" He asked crossing his arms over his chest but looking straight at her for once. She nodded hoping that his urge to tell her was stronger than the fears that held him back. Him even asking her that without trying to change the subject suggested he wanted to try and open up to her a little.

Edward studied her for a moment trying to work out if it was safe to tell her or not. He'd liked how it felt to vent to her when they'd left Peter's flat but that was about something she'd already heard. He didn't want word getting back to Jasper about what had happened but looking into Bella's warm brown eyes he wanted to trust her. So far she hadn't seemed interested in gossip and she already knew enough about it that he supposed adding the final details wasn't such a big deal.

"You can't tell Jasper any of this." He started before moving back across to the table to sit down while he told her what had happened after Emmett had found him at work. She kept quiet as he talked and started to make the white sauce needed for the lasagne which Edward found helped him to keep talking as she wasn't just staring at him though he could tell she was still listening to him from the frown which appeared to have taken up residence on her face the moment he got to the part about his parents house. By the time he'd finished talking Bella had the lasagne assembled and was just closing the oven door on it. That done, she turned back to him and sat down in the seat across from him.

"I can see why you don't want them involved in your life. Has Emmett always been that stupid?" She asked and Edward couldn't help but smile at that response. Glad she wasn't just feeling sorry for him and amused at her calling Emmett stupid.

Although Bella was glad to see the smile on his face she was also confused by it, she was genuinely furious about what he'd just told her. All the stories she'd heard from Jasper and Peter were nothing in comparison to what he'd done to his brother by exposing him to their parents and then letting him leave the way he had. Seeing Edward apparently happy in front of her though she tried to forget the anger and concentrate on him. If he could let it go she'd have to too but she wanted to know that he knew none of what had happened that day was his fault as she'd seen the way he'd tried to excuse their behaviour the day before.

"He acts before thinking things through and the consequences of what he does never occur to him. He's the kind of person who lives in the moment. I should have known better than to go with him." He answered causing Bella to frown again.

"He should never have suggested it in the first place, you can't be blamed for wanting to believe the best of them. Emmett played on your loneliness and love for Lucy which is just wrong." She was right, he knew she was but he still should have known better. He was a little taken aback by the strength of her reaction to what he'd told her, he'd expected her to pity him or just brush it all off but she seemed angry and not at him. That was different to what he'd grown used to and it confused him.

"I knew it would turn out the way it did. It wasn't Emmett's fault I was stupid enough to let him convince me otherwise. None of it matters anymore anyway, it is what it is and I can't change it." He sighed hoping they could drop the subject soon as although he'd initially been amused by her reaction the confusion was now getting to him and he wanted to just push it all aside and forget about it. He was trying his best but he'd reached his limit for the day and he wanted to go and find Lucy and lose himself in her cheerful chatter.

"Well by the sounds of it you're better off without the lot of them." Bella commented before catching the look on Edward's face that made it easy to tell he'd had enough of talking for the moment. "The lasagne is going to be in the oven for a while now so do you want to go see what the girls are up to?"

"Ok." Edward replied, grateful she was willing to drop it and seemingly read his mind. They found the girls in the living room sat on the floor with the TV on but a couple of dolls spread out around them. They looked up as Edward and Bella walked in and Lucy smiled to Edward. He sat down on the floor behind her so she climbed up onto his knee and handed him a doll like she would have if they were at home. Bella following Edward's lead also sat down on the floor, next to Anna and as Edward was already joining in the girls' game with the dolls she decided to join in too.

Bella got up when the lasagne should have been ready and went through to check it. Discovering it was indeed cooked, she served it out onto four plates before setting them down on the table along with knives and forks. Once that was done she went to the kitchen door and called everyone through. It only took a moment before they all came charging through the door, Lucy and Anna laughing as Edward chased them. Realising they were once more in the company of another adult Edward calmed down and sat quietly in his seat, grinning slightly and causing Bella to smile, glad to see his melancholy from their conversation had been left behind. Lucy sat down in the chair on Edward's left leaving Bella and Anna to sit down in their normal seats and once settled down they all began to eat.

Once the lasagne had gone Bella got ice cream out for everyone and they ate it as they talked. Edward was so different when the girls were around, the shy wary man was replaced by a far happier and talkative dad who was absorbed by anything his daughter had to say. It was unbelievably sweet to watch them interact and he included Anna into their conversation easily, seeming just as interested in what she had to say. With the way Anna was enthusiastically responding to him Bella knew her demands for Lucy to visit would always include Edward which she certainly wasn't opposed to. There wasn't even a hint of the usual fit she'd have thrown at Phil and Renee not being there. Phil had taken Renee out for dinner and Anna would often get moody when they went out without her. Phil wasn't always around and Anna tended to want to monopolize his attention when he was there. It seemed Edward and Lucy were the perfect distraction.

After dinner they all headed back into the living room and Bella put a Barbie DVD in for the girls to watch which she then regretted as Edward seemed quite content to sit and watch it with Lucy curled up on his lap. Resigned to the fact they wouldn't be getting another chance to talk Bella settled into a chair and pretended to watch the DVD too while sneaking glances at Edward who was twirling strands of Lucy's hair absentmindedly.

Edward was reminded of the dream he'd been so reluctant to leave that morning as they all sat there and it brought a sense of peace to him that he hadn't felt for a while. Something about sitting there with Bella and Anna felt right and it didn't even bother him that they were watching Barbie movies although he was thankful that Lucy seemed to prefer animated movies with animals in. He was slightly disappointed when Renee and Phil came home as although they were both pleasant towards him it meant it was time to go home. Lucy was apparently ready to leave though as she sleepily clung onto him, making him carry her out to Bella's car. He'd tried to protest her giving them a lift home but she'd shot down his arguments declaring that Poppy needed to be run regularly to stop the breaks from rusting up so he'd be doing her a favour letting her drive them home. He agreed to let her drive them for Poppy's sake then worried that Bella's insaneness over her car was rubbing off him. Lucy drifted off on the drive home giving Edward a chance to quietly thank Bella for inviting them and to say that he'd really enjoyed himself, a sentiment she happily returned.

Bella stayed and watched as Edward carried Lucy into their flat block not wanting to leave until they were safely inside. On her own for the drive home it gave her chance to really think about everything Edward had said. She was going to do her best to make sure Jasper didn't say anything to Alice about him. Her and Emmett may have been his family but it was obvious how much pain they had caused him and she didn't want to see him go through that again. She hadn't known him for long but she already felt fiercely protective of both him and Lucy and she'd do what she could to help them.

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><p>Lucy was all tucked up in bed sleeping peacefully while Edward was slumped on their sofa watching TV. He really had enjoyed their time at Bella's house. Although the conversation about his family had been hard it had felt good to talk about it. He was still confused over her reaction but it hadn't been negative towards him so that was a pleasant surprise. All in all it hadn't gone too badly and it bolstered his resolve to giving being friends with her a real go. She'd been right in assuming he never really did anything just for him so maybe she could be his one indulgence. It wasn't until he was curled up in bed fast asleep that his subconscious decided to remind him of one of the reasons he'd originally been reluctant to get to know Bella.<p>

_They were back in Bella's sitting room. Lucy was curled up on his knee and Anna sat beside them on the sofa while Bella occupied the large comfy looking chair to their right. Barbie was once again on the TV screen and that peaceful feeling was back. They heard the front door opening and assuming it was just Renee and Phil home no one moved. It wasn't until Bella jumped up from her seat with a panicked look across her face that Edward turned from the TV to see just who had entered. Seeing James standing in the doorway with that cold malicious smile made his blood run cold and he quickly detangled Lucy from his arms and headed towards him, putting himself between James and the girls. James beckoned him closer but before he moved he glanced back to where Bella was standing only to find her comfortable sitting room was no longer there and instead he was standing by himself on a cold dark street with nothing but a brick wall facing him. He didn't have time to turn back to see what James wanted before he was slammed face first into the wall with James' body pinning him in place._

_"You will pay." He snarled before Edward caught just a glimpse of something metallic out of the corner of his eye followed by a piercing pain in his side. James was suddenly gone so he reached down to where the pain was coming from and pressed his hand against it, feeling something warm and wet. He sank down the wall, clutching his side in attempt to stem the bleeding but the blood flowed through his fingers. It wasn't hurting as bad as he thought it should which worried him as he started to feel light headed. His eyes drifted shut and when they opened again he was collapsed against a sterile white wall. It smelt of disinfectant and as he looked around the white corridor he realised he was in a hospital. Forcing himself onto his feet he stumbled along, keeping one hand against the wall to stay upright as the other still pressed against his side. He turned a corner and was hit by the sight of Bella. Her back was to him but he knew it was her, she was sitting on the floor and as he looked closer at her he could see a pair of little arms wrapped tightly around her neck and a head of curly hair the same colour as his resting against her shoulder. Wanting to know what was going on he moved closer and could now hear their crying. Coming to a stop beside them he could see Lucy was absolutely distraught and it stabbed at his heart seeing her that way. He wanted to reach out and comfort her but they paid no attention to him. Tears were streaming down Bella's face as well as she hugged his little girl and whispered words that were meant to be comforting. They didn't seem to help Lucy calm at all but they struck something in him and the pain in his side ceased to exist as it felt like someone had completely torn his heart out of his chest._

_"I won't leave you I promise, it'll be ok. He'll always be with us Luce and I won't leave you. I won't let him down again."_

_He couldn't bear to watch them in so much pain anymore and looked away only to see the window they were in front of. It looked into a room with a single bed stood in the middle and machines to the side of it. Somebody was lying in the bed but the sheet was pulled up, covering the body from head to toe. He knew what that meant so he turned back to Bella and Lucy and sank to the floor beside them. They didn't react at all, like he wasn't even there as he joined them in their tears._

Edward jerked awake feeling a pain in his chest. It hurt so badly and he realised he was breathing shallowly and covered in a cold sweat. As his dream flooded through him the panic remained so he threw his covers off and headed straight for Lucy's room. Seeing her still soundly asleep he felt some of the panic dissipate and sat down on the floor with his back resting against her bed. There would be no more sleep for him that night but as he sat there watching her sleeping face his breathing slowly calmed and the rest of the panic left. It was just a dream, he was fine, Lucy was fine and he was sure Bella would be too. It was just a stupid dream but no matter how often he repeated that phrase to himself it didn't remove the lurking dread that made him wonder if it wasn't just a stupid dream and was actually a warning. He couldn't shake the feeling that something was coming and it wasn't going to be good.


	20. Chapter 18 Down, Down, Down

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer and the chapter for this title belongs to another Charlie Simpson song.

WARNING: This chapter contains some violence.

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><p><strong>Chapter 18 – Down, Down, Down<strong>

Bella wasn't the one to drop Anna off at school the next morning which didn't help Edward to settle his nerves after the dream he'd had. He'd managed to pull himself together by the time Lucy woke up so the only thing she was concerned with was the fact he looked tired again but he just blamed that on the cough which seemed to have returned with a vengeance. He'd been hoping to see Bella at the school so he could see that she was ok but he was more disappointed than he'd expected to be when he saw Phil walking down the street with Anna. Trying to hide the panic that wanted to well up in him he nodded to Phil who smiled before turning his attention to saying goodbye to Anna. They both looked happy which Edward tried to convince himself meant everything had to be ok at their house. He could have called her but he'd talked himself out of that one as he didn't want to let her know about the dream that had freaked him out and there was no way to explain why he wanted to check she was ok without telling her. It wasn't even like the dream had focused on her, it was him who had been hurt and she'd just been there to pick up the pieces but he didn't like the fact she was in it at all. He didn't want her messed up in whatever was going on with James and the fact his subconscious was putting her into the same dreams as him didn't sit well. Then again it was just a dream, it didn't have to mean anything. Like the night before, that thought didn't stick, something felt off and he didn't think it was a coincidence. He hadn't seen James again that morning either and the last time they'd been missing they'd chased him with Lucy. He was brought out of his thoughts by a sharp tug at his arm so he looked down to see Lucy staring up at him expectantly.

"I have to go in now." She told him wondering what he was thinking about so hard that he'd missed the sound of the bell.

"Sorry, I was just wondering where Bella was. Have a good day sweetheart." He responded, crouching down to hug her. She hugged him back before kissing his cheek and saying goodbye. As she ran through the gates he saw her spot Phil with Anna and she stopped with a frown on her face. Anna spotted her and waved and Lucy's expression cleared again. He watched Anna join her and say something before they both waved at Phil and went further into the playground. He wondered if Lucy was questioning Anna about Bella's whereabouts and hoped that she was so he could stop feeling so out of sorts.

Work flew by for Edward; they were unusually busy for a Tuesday morning and with his nerves already shot Edward found himself jumping every time he saw a baseball cap, glimpse of red hair or leather jacket clad man. He hadn't actually seen any sign of James or his friends but his imagination seemed to be running wild and Garrett hovering around him wasn't helping as the eyes he could feel watching him often belonged to him.

Garrett had been concerned when he saw Edward looking tired again and when he'd given him the same excuse he'd given Lucy Garrett had taken to keeping an eye on him. At the first sign of a coughing fit he'd been all ready to call his cousin out again and it had taken Edward quite a while to talk him out of it. The cough was annoying and caused his chest to hurt slightly but it was nothing to make a big deal out off, it would go away eventually and it was probably only the lack of sleep that was making it more obvious.

He was glad to escape Garrett's watchful eye when it was time to collect Lucy. There was still no sign of James but he hurried to get to the school hoping to get a chance to talk to Bella before the bell rang. Unfortunately when he got there Phil was standing across the street by a sleek expensive looking black car. It was nothing like Bella's crazy little mini and he found himself glaring at it for a moment before he realised Phil could spot him at any moment so he continued on to his usual spot by the gates. It wasn't long before the bell rang and Lucy ran up to him, eyeing his hair suspiciously and he belated realised he'd been running his hands through it a lot due to his nerves and frustration at Garrett's hovering. It was most likely sticking up on end much like it did when he suffered from nightmares and he really should have taken a moment to flatten it down again before Lucy saw him. It was too late now though so he just smiled, hugged her and asked how her day had been. She huffed at that which was unusual but he saw her glance to where Anna was happily talking to Phil before looking back to him.

"Anna told Bella she wanted her daddy to take her to school this week." She scowled and he was too relieved to know that Bella was ok to really worry about why it was annoying Lucy so much.

"She doesn't get to see her daddy all the time Luce, you can't be upset with her for wanting to spend time with him." He tried to placate her as they started their walk home.

"But I like Bella." She grumbled.

"I know you do. I'm sure we'll see her again soon." Lucy didn't look convinced but she let him shift the subject onto what she'd learnt that day.

It wasn't until Thursday afternoon that they actually saw Bella again. As soon as Edward spotted her outside the school he broke into a grin, pleasantly surprising Bella as he wasn't usually so enthusiastic. He was just relieved to see her, he hadn't had any more dreams but he was still on edge as the feeling that something was wrong just wasn't going away. Something inside of him eased seeing her standing there.

"Hey it's good to see you." He greeted as he stopped beside her.

"You too. Anna ditched me for Phil for the week but he's had to go back into work. I need to ask you a favour too. I was thinking we could take the girls to the park for a while so we can chat, if that's ok?" He looked a little confused but he nodded.

"Sure." He responded wondering what on earth she could need from him. There had been no sign of James or his friends in the last few days and he felt calmer than he had all week just standing next to her so he was happy to go to the park and he knew Lucy would be. She'd been getting increasingly more annoyed with Anna each time Phil turned up at the gates instead of Bella. He'd tried reasoning with her about it but she didn't seem to see why Anna would prioritise Phil over Bella, either that or it was just messing with her plans to set them up. Whatever the reason he hoped she'd drop her annoyance now that Bella was back, he knew she'd be miserable if she fell out with Anna.

The bell rang and the girls soon found them, Anna looking distinctly sullen as she stood in front of them while Lucy nearly knocked Bella over with an enthusiastic hug.

"Well at least someone's pleased to see me." She laughed glancing to Anna as Lucy let go of her to hug Edward.

"Not in Anna's good books right now?" Edward asked after saying hello to Lucy and Bella shook her head.

"No, no one is right now." She commented while throwing an annoyed glance to her sister who just glowered back at her.

"Hmm well let's head to the park, see if that helps at all." Edward said and caught the flash of a smile on Anna's face before she scowled again. It seemed she was going to be stubbornly miserable for the day as she stomped along behind them pulling against Bella's hand as they walked. Lucy however was the complete opposite as she skipped along in between Edward and Bella. Instead of telling them about school she was bombarding Bella with questions wanting to know what she'd been up to for the last couple of days. Edward tried to appear like he wasn't eagerly listening to every answer Bella gave but he was incredibly glad for Lucy's inquisitiveness. He'd have felt awkward and like a stalker asking her what she'd been up to but Lucy being five could get away with it and it was surprisingly settling for him to hear nothing out of the ordinary had happened. It seemed all Bella had done for the last few days was college work.

"I don't think I've ever been asked so many questions about college before." Bella commented as they sat down on a bench by the play park and Lucy and Anna ran off towards the slide.

"Yeah sorry about that. She missed seeing you." Edward answered while keeping his eyes on Lucy so Bella wouldn't catch on to the fact Lucy wasn't the only one who'd missed her. His worrying about the dream seemed stupid now. "What did you want to talk to me about?"

"Ah, well, as I said before Phil's had to go into work, he was meant to be home for at least another week but they called last night and he had to leave again a couple of hours ago. Anna didn't take it so well and to try and calm her down Mum said we could do whatever she wanted this weekend. She chose a girly sleepover night. So the favour would be letting Lucy join us tomorrow night." Bella explained, she wasn't sure how well that idea would go down with Edward considering she suspected he hadn't ever spent a night away from his daughter. She hoped he'd agree to it though as it would probably do him some good to have a night off and it would certainly improve the mood in her household.

"What does a girly sleepover involve?" He asked trying to stall answering. He knew Lucy would love it and he didn't want her to miss out on things like that but he was reluctant to it as he'd be on his own for the night and the flat would seem extremely strange and lonely without Lucy there, curled up on his knee or chatting away happily. She probably wouldn't even miss him that much but he knew he'd end up worrying about her and stressing himself out. It wasn't fair to hold her back just for his sake though so he knew he'd end up agreeing to it.

"Disney movies, junk food and probably lots of pink nail polish and glittery make-up." She answered, "Not my idea of fun but Anna was adamant about it; both me and Mum have to be there to camp out in the living room for the night. I can drive Lucy home Saturday morning or you could come round for lunch to collect her if you want."

"Sounds like Lucy would love it." He commented, make-up was one of the things Edward had never really introduced Lucy to. He knew other girls her age liked playing with make-up but there were some things dads just weren't very good for. Considering how much she loved dolls and pretty dresses he was pretty sure she'd love the chance to have a girly night.

"Is that a yes then?" Bella asked hopefully, she could see that he was slightly doubtful about it as he kept flicking his gaze across to Lucy and the happy glint that she had always seen in his eyes before when it came to her wasn't quite there but he sighed then nodded.

"Yes, it'll be the first time she's ever stayed away from home though so I don't know if she'll get upset or anything." He answered although he knew it was more likely he'd be the upset one. Lucy had obviously decided she loved Bella so he doubted she'd mind staying overnight at their house. He'd just have to find something to occupy himself with. Work was usually busy on Fridays so he could always ask Garrett if they needed a hand, that would kill a few hours at least.

"Well if she does we can call you though I'll need your number first." Bella responded before digging through her bag for her notepad. She handed it to Edward along with a pen so he wrote down both his mobile and the landline numbers along with his address. He knew she probably wouldn't need that but he'd feel better knowing she had it just in case.

"We'll take good care of her, she'll be perfectly fine." Bella tried to assure him as he was still frowning slightly while he watched Lucy and Anna playing.

"I know." He sighed running a hand through his hair before turning his attention back to Bella who was watching him. "It's not her I'm worried about."

"Ah, I'm sure you'll be fine too and you can always call us if you miss her too much." She responded leaning over and bumping shoulders with him. He looked at her a little surprised at the contact but when she smiled he returned it and she was glad to see his anxiousness relax a little.

"Thanks for including her in this by the way, there are some things I'm just not cut out for." He didn't want her to think he was ungrateful for the invitation from his less than enthusiastic response. It wasn't her fault he didn't know what to do without Lucy and he really was glad that they were including her as they were the only female influences Lucy had in her life.

"That's ok, I don't think I'm cut out for it either really. Cooking I can do, make-up not so much." She replied and he wondered if that was why she never wore the stuff, not that she needed to. Close up her skin was still a perfectly clear ivory rendering foundation redundant and her eyes were large and mesmerizing on their own. They were deep and expressive adorned by naturally long lashes and as she looked up at him through them he found her eyes didn't need any enhancing to captivate him.

"You look beautiful without it." He blurted before realising what he'd said. He really hadn't meant to say that out loud and he wished Lucy would run up and interrupt them so he could escape the awkward situation he was sure he'd just caused but she was happily playing on the climbing frame and needed no assistance.

"Thank you." Bella responded unable to do anything about the blush that flooded her cheeks and thankful that Edward missed it due to his gaze being fixed on Lucy. It was probably the best compliment she'd ever had purely because it was Edward who had given it. She could tell he was uncomfortable with what he'd just said with how he was now looking around the park like he wanted an excuse to run but that also made her certain he'd meant what he'd said. He thought she was beautiful. She was just about to let him avoid what he'd said by trying to finalize how Lucy would be getting home on Saturday when he suddenly sat up straight, his eyes glued to a woman standing on the other side of the play park. Seeing the colour drain from his face and the way he glanced to Lucy before staring at the woman again she wondered what was going on. She was leaning against a tree, her attention firmly held by the phone she appeared to be typing a message into. It didn't look like she'd noticed anyone else there but Edward had certainly noticed her. It was hardly surprising considering she was rather eye catching with her bright red curly hair. Bella felt a flash of jealousy as he'd only just told her he thought she was beautiful and now this redhead had stolen his attention. She was wearing a black lace mini dress with ripped leggings, red Dr. Martins boots and a worn leather jacket that looked like it belonged to a man as it was a couple of sizes too big for her. As she brushed some of her hair out of her face and behind her ear Bella could just make out the piercing in her nose and the many hoops that ran down the edge of her exposed ear. All in all she was a very striking woman and next to her plain self she guessed she could see why she'd catch Edward's attention. She suddenly felt really stupid, she knew nothing of Edward's dating history, for all she knew that woman could have been Lucy's mother, she certainly had the curls for it. The redhead slid her phone into one of her jacket pockets and looked up, straight at Edward before smiling and waving at him. Bella looked back to Edward and realised that while she'd been feeling jealous and sorry for herself something very different had been going on with him. He looked positively sick.

"What's wrong? Do you know her?" She asked jerking his attention back to her. His eyes were wide and panicked.

"Not really. I've got to go." He responded distractedly as he jumped to his feet and called out to Lucy. She watched him agitatedly grab at his hair as he waited for Lucy to reach him and was totally baffled as to what was going on.

"What's going on Edward?" Something felt really wrong to Bella. He was acting like he was scared of the woman but she couldn't see why he would be and he said he didn't know her yet he obviously recognised her. It didn't make any sense.

"Nothing. I'm sorry I've really got to go."

Lucy had finally reached them and Edward took her hand, not even giving her chance to say goodbye to Bella before he was striding away from the bench, Lucy struggling to keep up.

"Edward wait!" Bella called after him as she stood and watched them leave but it made no difference as he hurried Lucy along. Lucy looked back at her and waved and then they were gone. Not getting any answers from them Bella looked back to the redhead who was now watching her and when she noticed she had Bella's attention she smirked before pushing away from the tree and walking off in the opposite direction to Edward leaving Bella to wonder what on earth had just happened, who the woman was and what she meant to Edward.

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><p>Lucy didn't need to ask Edward what was wrong as he walked slightly too quickly for her. She'd caught sight of Vicky as she'd waved goodbye to Bella so she understood why he'd wanted to leave so quickly but he was walking too fast for her so she had to stop and tug at his hand. He realised the problem as soon as they stopped and lifted her up to carry her the rest of the way.<p>

By the time they reached the flat Lucy was happy that Edward seemed to have managed to calm himself down, he certainly wasn't in the panicky state that had resulted from their last meeting with James and Vicky and was instead pretending that everything was fine. She was used to that and it usually meant that whatever was concerning him wasn't as bad as he was thinking so she didn't ask him any questions, not wanting to worry him further.

He made them dinner on autopilot. When he'd wanted an escape from what he'd said to Bella he had not wanted it in the form of Vicky. He knew James had seen him outside Lucy's school plenty of times but standing by Bella outside the gates wouldn't have looked like anything special. Sitting next to each other on a park bench with Anna and Lucy off playing however would. That lurking feeling he'd had since his dream was back full force, they'd seen him with Bella now and he knew they'd see that as an opportunity. They were already using Lucy as their safety net from him telling anyone about them so he dreaded to think what they'd use Bella for if they assumed there was something going on between them. This really wasn't good and he had no idea what to do about it. He couldn't warn Bella as they'd hurt Lucy and he couldn't stay away from her with Lucy and Anna being best friends. He'd already failed at keeping his distance so he knew there was no point trying that again especially as the damage was already done. He'd just have to pray they left Bella alone, surely the more people they involved the higher their risk of being caught and he was positive they wouldn't want that. He'd just have to hope they had some common sense.

He told Lucy about the sleepover as they ate and just as he'd expected she was excited about it. It helped him to ignore his own thoughts as he helped her decide what she wanted to take with her and after telling her the options Bella had suggested about getting her home she told him he was joining them for lunch. Not wanting to upset her and amused at her bossing him around again he agreed without a fight but was left wondering if that offer would still be there after they way he'd left the park. He knew Bella had to be confused about his reaction to seeing Vicky and he dreaded to think what conclusions she'd come to on her own.

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><p>When they reached the school gates Edward felt terrible. He hadn't been able to sleep very well so he was tired and stressed out. It had occurred to him after he'd gone to bed that leaving Bella and Anna alone in the park with Vicky probably hadn't been a very good idea. At the time all he'd thought about was getting Lucy away and he figured it would have been better for Bella to be away from him but he could have been wrong with that assumption and the possibility that Vicky might have decided to get to him through hurting Bella had kept him awake. He was relieved to see her standing there looking unharmed but she wasn't smiling as they approached which eclipsed his relief as it probably meant she hadn't forgotten the rude way they'd suddenly left the park.<p>

"Hey, I'm really sorry for leaving so suddenly yesterday." He hoped an apology would be enough for her to forget it but as the girls happily greeted each other Bella just looked at him while crossing her arms across her chest.

"Why exactly did you leave? Who was that woman?" She asked, it had been bugging her ever since they'd all left the park. No one had ever mentioned any women in his life so she had nothing to go on at all as to who she was and his reaction to her had been so strange. She knew she had no right to feel so territorial about him but she didn't like that fact the redhead had affected him so much. She was also pretty sure throwing a tantrum over it wouldn't help her much with Edward but she wanted some answers and he was far too good at avoidance.

"I wish I knew but I don't and I don't want Lucy around her. Did you guys get home ok?" He tried to deflect the conversation to her and he saw her eyes narrow as she realised what he was doing.

"Yup, why wouldn't we?" She asked watching his reaction carefully. Something about her answer relaxed him but he quickly appeared agitated again as he ran a hand through his hair before sighing.

"If you see her again, please just get away without making it obvious." He muttered quietly glancing to the girls hoping they weren't paying attention. They were too busy discussing the toys Lucy had packed for the sleepover to notice anything else around them so he focussed back on Bella. She wasn't looking quite so annoyed with him anymore; instead she was just looking confused.

"Why? Who is she?" She asked again narrowing her eyes at him as he continued to fidget. Something about this woman really got to him and she couldn't tell if he was trying to warn her off because she was dangerous or because she had something to do with him and he didn't want them talking to each other.

"I can't tell you and I honestly don't know. Just please stay away from her." He pleaded and the panicked look in his eyes forced her to give in with a sigh. He looked too panicked to be lying to her so all she could do was believe he didn't know her, which only left the option she was dangerous somehow. She'd looked a little out there with her wild hair and dress sense but she hadn't looked dangerous so she was still confused but she'd let it go for now if he'd calm down. .

"Fine, I still want and explanation but I'll stay away from her."

"Thank you and for what it's worth I really am sorry about just leaving yesterday." He rambled, relieved that she was giving in. He couldn't tell her who Vicky was or why she had to stay away from her but knowing she'd take notice of his warning would save him a little worrying.

"It's ok, you had your reasons I guess. Is Lucy still on for the sleepover?" Bella tried to find a smile and forget her annoyance but she was still just as confused as before about what had happened so it wasn't easy. The bell would be ringing any minute though so any issues she had with what Edward had or hadn't told her would have to wait, the girls came first and they still needed to finalise plans.

"Yeah, I've got her bag here and she wants me to pick her up at lunch time." He responded showing her the little pink rucksack they'd had to get up early to pack with everything she'd need for staying the night at Bella's. Bella took it from him and finally smiled; if Lucy had forced him into coming for lunch she'd maybe get a chance to get a little more information about the redhead out of him then. He had to know something about her if the mere sight of her forced him to flee the park and warn her away from her.

"Great, I'll see you then and don't worry about Lucy, she will be perfectly fine with us." She responded just as the bell rang so their conversation paused as they both focussed on saying goodbye to the girls.

"Be good for Bella tonight ok, and I'll see you tomorrow lunch time." Edward told Lucy and she nodded before hugging him. He hugged her back tightly finding he really didn't want to let go. It felt really odd to be saying goodbye to her and knowing he wouldn't be seeing her again until the following day. It made him feel sick and he was glad she didn't seem to have the same issue with it as she pulled away and kissed his cheek.

"Have fun." He said quietly and she smiled at him before running into the school with Anna. Edward straightened up and watched her go before turning to face Bella again.

"Already missing her?" She asked seeing the pained look on his face and he nodded as there was no point trying to deny it.

"Yeah, it feels really strange knowing I'm not going to be picking her up later." He answered.

"I'm sure you'll get used to it. What are you going to do with your child free night?" Bella asked, curious as to what he would choose to do now he had the chance and trying to distract him from focussing on missing Lucy.

"I don't know, I'll probably just see if they need some extra help at work. If there are any problems with Lucy ring me and I'll come round." He answered fidgeting with his hair again. This didn't feel right. He knew Lucy would be fine but he couldn't help wanting to cancel the whole thing and spend the night cuddling her instead.

"You don't need to worry, she'll be fine. Find something fun to do." Bella suggested not liking the idea of him of him just sitting around worrying about Lucy all night. She'd hoped he'd use this chance to just relax but his agitation made that seem unlikely.

"I'll try, guess I'll see you tomorrow then." He said knowing he had to get to work.

"See you then and try not to worry!" Bella responded and very quickly hugged him due to the forlorn expression on his face as he glanced back at the school. He seemed too shocked to return the gesture so she quickly let go and headed off to college with a small wave as Edward stood and watched her, too dazed by her hug to realise he was meant to be walking to work.

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><p>As soon as he got to work he explained about Lucy's sleepover and asked if they needed any extra help on the afternoon shift. Garrett had been reluctant at first wondering why Edward would choose to work and had instead suggested he go out and have some fun for the evening but Edward had quickly refused that idea so Garrett had given in and allowed him to work although he made sure Edward knew he wouldn't hold him to it if he changed his mind during the day. Edward was sure though, he didn't want to go out on his own, not only was it unsafe but he wouldn't have a clue where to go and his only friend was currently looking after his daughter so that left working or going home to an empty flat. The less time he had to spend there by himself the better so working it was.<p>

Work was slow during the morning giving Edward plenty of time to dwell on Bella. She confused him. She'd started off annoyed with him that morning then had swallowed his poor excuses and explanations without much of a fight and had somehow managed to end up hugging him. He didn't understand it. The hug had only lasted a couple of seconds and he'd been too stunned at the action to return it but the feel of it had amazed him. No one but Lucy had hugged him for the last five years and it was ridiculous how good it had felt to finally get that kind of comfort from someone. He wished it had lasted longer and that he'd returned it but most of all he wished he could feel it again. It was totally wrong in light of what was going on in his life but that one little hug had him craving more so it was a good job he was scared of what would happen if any of James' friends saw them or he'd probably end up making a fool of himself and ruining everything. She was just trying to reassure him and it was unlikely to happen again. He just needed to keep reminding himself of that but at least unfeasible daydreams were a lot better than dwelling on his worries.

Edward worked through the day right up until closing time. He helped Garrett close up and then they were both left stood outside the shop, Edward not looking forward to the prospect of going home to an empty flat. Garrett had been trying all afternoon to persuade Edward not to work and instead go out but every attempt had failed. Deciding now would be the last possible chance he decided to try and get Edward to join him for a drink somewhere.

"Listen, do you want to go get a drink before going home?" He asked Edward as they stood outside, just about to say goodbye. Edward stayed silent for a minute thinking. He had never actually been to a pub before, in fact he'd never been anywhere other than a school disco or the plays and parents evenings at Lucy's school. He'd never really even thought about going out before, always knowing that he'd have Lucy and he couldn't. Guessing that he probably wouldn't get the chance to again, and knowing if he ever did get the chance it would probably be on his own he decided to go, it had to be better than sitting in an empty flat by himself and he trusted Garrett. .

"Ok." He answered making Garrett smile.

"Right then, come on." He said and with that they started heading further into town, Edward just following Garrett, not knowing where they were going. They finally reached a stop and Edward looked to their side to see Garrett heading into a traditional looking pub. Edward quickly followed him in and went to find a table as Garrett got the drinks. It was a cosy little place, the walls a mix of dark wood panelling and deep red paint and the floor space was filled with a few wooden tables in different shapes and sizes with mismatched wooden chairs. The edges of the room were split into little booths with red cushioned benches and it was one of those in the far corner that Edward chose to sit in. He could see the majority of the pub from there including Garrett standing by the bar, ordering the drinks. The person serving him was a girl who looked to Edward only a couple of years older than himself. She handed Garrett two pint glasses and then Garrett turned from the bar and spotted him straight away.

"Here you go." He sat Edward's drink down on the table and took a seat opposite him. Edward took hold of his glass and looked at the dark liquid filling it for a minute before picking it up and taking a sip. He assumed it was some type of beer but that was about as much as his limited alcohol knowledge could tell him.

"So, who's Lucy staying with?" Garrett asked, trying to start up a conversation before taking a sip from his drink. The silence didn't feel awkward as the general atmosphere in the pub took over with the lull of contented chatter from the other drinkers but he wanted Edward to have a good time and relax. Sitting in silence wasn't really part of that plan.

"Anna, her best friend. They're having a girly night with Anna's mum and her big sister, Bella." He answered, Garrett just nodded, as he had another sip of his drink.

"This the first time she's stayed overnight at a friend's house?" He asked genuinely interested as he sat his drink down on the table.

"Yeah." Edward nodded, staring into his drink, starting to miss her again. He wondered what she was doing and hoped she was having fun. Garrett could see the worry and longing in Edward's eyes and figured it might do him some good to talk about it rather than just worry over her being away.

"Does it feel a bit strange? Knowing she's somewhere that's not with you?" He asked. Edward nodded again but didn't say anything.

"Guess it's something you'll have to get used to now." Garret commented and Edward nodded again. He knew it was likely Lucy would want more sleepovers after experiencing her first one and he'd have to work on being ok with that.

"Yeah, she likes being round Anna's house. She's trying to set me up with Bella." Edward replied and Garrett smiled slightly.

"Maybe you should listen to her, she's a smart kid that girl."

"She is that but Bella's just a friend." He responded. They continued their conversation, moving on from Lucy and onto music before talking a bit about Garrett's family and the shop as they enjoyed their first then second and third drinks. Edward decided after the third drink that he really ought to be headed home, not wanting to get at all drunk and wanting to be home before it got too late so he said goodbye to Garrett and thanked him for the drinks then left. Garrett watched him leave, hoping Edward would get home safely and maybe get some more opportunities to get out now Lucy was growing up.

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><p>Edward pulled his jacket tight around him and zipped it up before shoving his hands deep in his pockets, the cold getting to him after the warmth of the pub. It was already quite dark so he started walking at a quick pace, keeping his head down, trying to be as unnoticeable as possible to anyone else out. He tried not to pay attention to anyone around him, deciding that for once he wouldn't be jumpy and would just walk home without worrying. To keep himself distracted he thought about what he'd do when he got home. As Lucy wasn't there he decided he'd just watch something on TV and maybe tidy up a bit. Thinking about that set him wondering what Lucy was doing now, wondering whether she was having fun or missing him at all. He knew he was missing her, and even though he wanted her to be having fun he still half hoped she was missing him slightly too as if she was it would show she needed him as much as he needed her.<p>

He kept walking but as he got further from the pub he started to hear footsteps behind him. Deciding he was just being paranoid he didn't look behind himself and instead kept walking on determinedly. After five minutes of this he was beginning to doubt whether it was just paranoia or whether there was actually someone following him. He stopped walking but the footsteps carried on and now his weren't masking them they were even louder and clearer. Filling with dread he slowly turned around just to find nothing but an empty street behind him. Cursing himself for imagining things he began to walk again, slightly quicker than before. As he walked he couldn't shake the idea of being followed now it had once entered his head and he thought about starting to run, wanting to be home as quickly as possible. He knew though that he wouldn't have the strength to be able to run all the way home and if someone was following him they'd soon catch up with him and then he'd have no energy at all to even try and fight them off.

He'd been walking for ten minutes when he suddenly knew for sure that he had been followed. The firm grip that was pulling his left arm up behind his back at an awkward angle and shoving him towards the side of the pavement face first into a wall was the key factor for his sudden gain of knowledge. Edward struggled against the hold but just felt more pressure being added to his arm and the rough surface off the wall scraping against his cheek. He tried to push back to free himself but the person holding him was a lot stronger than he was and he couldn't move at all against them. His captor didn't move as Edward struggled, just keeping him in place as he slowly used up any energy and strength he had in the pointless fight. His breathing was becoming laboured and the added pressure of being forcefully held against the wall was making his chest hurt with each breath he dragged in. Realising that he couldn't push the person off, Edward kicked back and felt his heel connect with a leg. As soon as that happened he felt the hold on his arm tighten further and he gave up his fight knowing that any more pressure on his arm would result in a dislocated shoulder.

"Is that all the fight you've got?" A horribly familiar voice chuckled as he fell still.

"What do you want?" Edward asked now knowing that it was James pinning him to the wall. He couldn't hear anyone else nearby and hoped his friends weren't suddenly going to appear. It seemed one of them was enough.

"Well the plan was for slow and steady but it seems you aren't taking us seriously so I think you need a little reminder." James hissed in his ear, still pinning him to the wall and not letting his grip go at all on Edward's arm. "You were meant to be suffering, yet you seem awfully happy with your new pretty girlfriend and catching up with old friends. Oh and walking around on your own at night without a care? That just won't do. You need to suffer to pay for what you did and I'm going to make sure you do."

With that it seemed James was done talking as he suddenly yanked Edward's arm up with an audible pop causing Edward to cry out from the excruciating pain radiating from his shoulder and down his arm. James didn't give him time to try and recover from that before he forcefully pushed him to the ground and kicked him in the ribs. Edward was sure he heard a crunch as James' foot connected at a point on his right still bruised from their last attack. He tried to scramble away but the pain in his shoulder left him unable to push himself up as he couldn't use his left arm and when he tried to move his right arm his ribs protested and left him gasping for breath. James watched in amusement as he struggled with his own body before he crouched down over him and grabbed a fistful of his hair, harshly yanking his head up so they were nose to nose.

"You're pathetic." He snarled then slammed Edward's head back into the pavement before he stood and calmly walked away leaving Edward trying to fight the blackness that wanted to take over his vision. Knowing that James could decide to come back or that his friends might be nearby waiting for their turn Edward knew he needed to get up so he tried his best to ignore the pain that was making his head swim. Staying on the pavement wasn't an option so he gingerly tried to get up, making sure not to use his left arm and trying to put as little weight as he could on his right. It was a slow and painful process but he finally made it to his feet with his chest feeling tight and breathing getting more difficult by the minute. He was pretty sure at least one of his ribs was broken and as he started stumbling his way home he realised that was the least of his problems. As he moved Edward could tell something was seriously wrong, his head was filled with a deep throbbing pain from the point where it had made contact with the pavement and he could feel blood trickling down the back of his neck. He was feeling distinctly woozy and wasn't sure how long he could keep moving for. One thing he was becoming sure of was the fact he wouldn't be able to make it home, no matter how badly he wanted to. The pain in his shoulder seemed to be lessening suggesting he was going into shock. His laboured breathing was getting worse, his chest feeling tighter with every step which was compounded by his cough. He could feel his legs wanting to cave in as the final remains of his energy slowly ran out and as he felt his knees meeting the pavement rather painfully he caught sight of a familiar doorway just ahead of him. Deciding it was the best he could do he slowly and painfully crawled towards it, his shock allowing him to ignore his injuries and focus on dragging himself to the best safety he could find. Once inside the doorway he shuffled himself up so his back was against one wall and his side was against the locked door, the metal grill cold against his side. He slowly leant his head against it and closed his eyes to the still thudding pain. He opened his eyes again after a minute as a particularly nasty coughing fit took over and he lifted his right hand to cover his mouth. When the coughing stopped and it felt like he could hardly breathe he lowered his hand and looked at it. There were small dark spots splattered across his skin but his vision was suddenly foggy and he couldn't focus on it. He had to close his eyes to stop the swimming sensation that was making him want to vomit and let out low moan against it before he felt all the pain begin to fade. He wondered if this was what his dream had warned him about and hoped Lucy was ok and happy, at least he knew she was in good hands. His last thought before everything faded away was that he really had to stop passing out in doorways.


	21. Chapter 19 Collision

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 19 – Collision<strong>

Garrett walked up to his shop, whistling an unknown tune to himself looking forward to a nice busy day at work. As he got closer to the shop he thought he could see something in the doorway and walked a little quicker, curious as to what it was but when he reached the shop he came to an abrupt stop, his whistling dying out immediately. Sat there, was what appeared to be a very cold, unconscious Edward. At least he hoped he was just unconscious. He quickly moved to be crouched down next to him and reached out, placing two fingers on the pulse point on his neck. He was extremely relieved to find a pulse and once sure it was there he dug in his pocket for his mobile and quickly pulled it out, dialling nine nine nine and asking for an ambulance. Once the call was ended he put his mobile away and took a closer look at Edward, his skin was so pale it had a greyish, bluish tinge to it and his lips were starting to turn a pale blue. His breathing was shallow and now that he was listening to it he could hear a grating noise with each breath Edward took. His left arm seemed to be sitting at an odd angle and something looked weird about his shoulder but he wasn't sure if that was just to do with the way he was slumped against the door or not. Garrett called his name a couple of times in an attempt to wake him but he didn't stir at all. He didn't want to try shaking him or moving him until help came not knowing what was wrong with him so the only thing he could think to do was to try and get him warm. He took his own coat off and laid it over Edward hoping it would help then settled down on the floor next to him listening to his breathing. It occurred to him then that Edward would likely want Lucy the instant he woke up and knowing that the only way he'd have a chance of finding her was through his phone he moved his coat slightly to be able to search Edward's pockets and luckily found his phone just before the ambulance arrived.

The paramedics joined Garrett beside Edward and as one started to check him over the other questioned Garrett to find out what had happened. Garrett however couldn't tell them anything and was instead stunned into silence as the paramedic checking Edward over moved his head slightly and they all caught sight of the blood that had come from the back of his head and dripped down his neck, soaking into his jacket and leaving a large stain on the wall where he'd been leant against it. The paramedics moved to lay Edward down flat on his back and while one went off to get the stretcher Garrett looked at Edward again, noticing the grazing down one cheek and then as his gaze fell down Edward's body he could now see there was definitely something wrong with his shoulder. The paramedics seemed more concerned over his breathing though as they settled an oxygen mask over his face before starting to look at his shoulder. It didn't take them long to secure it into a sling, strap him into the stretcher and load him into the ambulance, Garrett watching everything in silence trying to stay out of their way as they worked.

"Do you want to come with us?" One of the paramedics asked as the doors were being closed up. Garrett paused for a minute, still shocked over the state Edward was in but also realising the shop needed opening up. He looked around for some idea of what to do and spotted one of the shop workers heading towards them. He quickly called out to them to open up, threw the shop keys in their direction and climbed into the ambulance.

The ambulance made its way through the town, lights flashing and siren going. In the back drips had been inserted into Edward's arm and he'd been hooked up to a heart monitor that was steadily bleeping. They'd wrapped him in a silver blanket and his colouring hadn't improved yet but it wasn't long before the paramedic stripped the blanket away muttering something about a fever.

On arrival to the hospital the ambulance stopped and the doors opened. Edward was lifted out and Garrett followed as he was pushed through into A and E where they were met by a surprised Carlisle. He promised Garrett he'd take good care of Edward and asked him to wait by reception and give Edward's details to the receptionist before heading back through the doors Edward had been taken through. Garrett did as he'd been asked and filled in the form the receptionist gave him as best he could. She then told him he could go and wait in the relatives' room and that if needed there were some payphones just outside it. Garrett thanked her then followed her directions through the corridors until he found the pay phones. He pulled out Edward's mobile from his pocket and found his way into his phone book. He was surprised to see just how few contacts he had but it helped his task as to working out which one would help him find Lucy. The only numbers Edward had stored were Garrett's, Carlisle's, the shops, his landlord, Lucy's school and a final one listed as Bella. Thankful for the conversation he'd had with Edward the night before he found some change to tip into the payphone before dialling her number. It rang a few times making him look at his watch to find it was only half eight so they were probably still asleep and he was just about to give up and try again a little while later when it was finally answered.

"Hello?" A very sleepy female voice came through the phone.

"Hi, is this Bella?" He asked hoping he'd got the right person. Edward hadn't mentioned their surname or what their mother was called. If this wasn't her, he had no idea how to go about finding Lucy.

"Yes, who is this?"

"I'm Garrett Cullen, Edward Masen's boss. His daughter Lucy is with you right?" He asked hopefully.

"Yes, is everything all right?"

"I'm afraid not, Edward's in hospital. I was hoping I could come and collect Lucy, he's going to want her here when he wakes up." He heard a sharp intake of breath at his news before the girl's voice suddenly sounded a lot more awake.

"I'll bring her in. He left her in my care and no offence but I don't know you so it would be wrong to leave her until he says it's ok. We'll be there as soon as we can be. What's wrong with him? Is it serious?" She sounded genuinely concerned rather than just asking out of curiosity which made Garrett hopeful that her and Edward were actual friends rather than just knowing each other for the girls' sake. He had a feeling Edward was going to need some friends around him.

"I don't really know, I found him collapsed outside the shop this morning. I'm hoping someone will have some news soon."

"Ok well I better go so we can get ready. We'll see you soon." With that they both hung up and he headed into the relatives' room hoping that Carlisle would be able to tell him what was wrong with Edward soon.

Garret was just getting out of his seat after waiting for forty five minutes and not hearing anything to go and find someone when the door to the relatives' room opened and a very frazzled looking young women with long wavy brown hair flying loose around her came through with a worried Lucy clinging onto her hand. She let go as soon as she spotted Garrett and ran over to him, holding her arms out for a hug.

"Where's Daddy?" She asked and he could now see the tears that were glossing over her eyes although she wasn't letting them fall yet.

"Do you remember my cousin, Dr. Carlisle?" He asked and when she nodded he continued, "He's looking after your daddy, he'll come and get us as soon as we can see him."

"What's wrong with him? Did they hurt him again?" She asked into his neck where she'd buried her head. She was trying her best not to cry but she wanted her daddy.

"I don't know sweetheart we need to wait for Carlisle to come and tell us." Lucy seemed to accept that as she didn't comment further and instead just tightened her arms around Garrett's neck letting him turn to the woman who had arrived with her.

"You must be Bella, Edward told me a little about you last night." He said reaching the hand out which wasn't holding Lucy in place on his hip. Bella stepped forward and shook it then brushed her hair back from her face letting Garrett get a proper look at her. She looked almost as upset as Lucy had and it made him wonder if Edward was right about them just being friends or if Lucy had a better idea of what was going on between them. She was a pretty girl who by the looks of it cared about him and took good care of Lucy; he'd be stupid not to take notice of that.

"So there's been no news yet?" She asked as they both moved over to the seats, letting Lucy get comfy on Garrett's knee.

"No but he's in good hands." He tried to assure both girls.

"And you've no idea what happened to him?" Bella pressed, surely he had to know something if he'd found him. She'd seen the bruises he'd had before and if he was in hospital she dreaded to think how much worse he'd be this time.

"No, we went out for a drink after work last night, something must have happened on his way home."

"So much for telling him to have fun." Bella sighed before they were interrupted by the door opening again and due to Garrett's relieved expression she assumed it had to be Edward's doctor.

"Is he ok?" Garrett asked stirring Lucy into lifting her head so she could see Carlisle. He wasn't smiling like he had been the last time she'd seen him. Instead he looked tired and concerned.

"He's stable. We tried to contact his next of kin but the number in his file is out of use. I don't suppose you'd know how to contact them?"

"I don't even know who it would be, the only family I know of is Lucy." Garrett answered, "Can you tell us what's wrong with him?"

"Not until he wakes up and tells me I can. It would really help him if we could get hold of his next of kin." Carlisle responded, he knew Lucy was his daughter but she was only five and this wasn't something he wanted to explain to someone that young and she most likely wouldn't understand it anyway. What he'd found while treating Edward had him very concerned, it went a lot deeper than what had happened in the night and he wanted someone there who could help. He knew Garrett was fond of Edward and would help out if he could but this was going to take a lot of time and he didn't think Garrett was the right person for it. If Edward had family somewhere they were the best option right now.

"He's not on speaking terms with his family." Bella spoke up and Garrett looked at her, surprised that she knew anything of Edward's family when he'd never spoken a word about them to him.

"Do you know how to contact them?" Carlisle asked noticing her for the first time. He had no idea who she was but assumed she must have been looking after Lucy since she was now there and she hadn't been with Garrett when Edward was brought in.

"I guess but he won't want them here." She answered, fidgeting anxiously with a hair tie she had wrapped around her wrist.

"They make him cry." Lucy added, having been following the conversation and knowing Bella was right. He really wouldn't want them there. "Can I see him?"

"He's still asleep Lucy but you can sit with him." Carlisle answered her then looked back to Bella and Garrett. "If you can get hold of his family please try, he's going to need them and I'd really like to speak to them."

"What does that mean?" Garrett asked, getting up since Lucy had scrambled off his knee and was tugging at his hand wanting to go and see her daddy. Carlisle looked at the three of them and sighed knowing he shouldn't be giving out details to non family members but then again Lucy was family and she was currently in their care.

"It's going to be a long recovery and he's going to need a lot of help. It's obvious he didn't look after himself after that bout of flu and it's caused problems. If he gets discharged and there's no one there taking care of him he's just going to end up back in here so if there's any chance his family would be up for being there for him it would be in his best interests. He's not going to be capable of looking after Lucy and I'd rather not have to involve social services." He explained and watched the hard expression on Bella's face from the mention of his family crumble.

"I can call someone who can get hold of his sister and brother. They'd probably be willing to come but I don't know how much help they'd be to him and he certainly won't like it." Bella responded, she could do her best to help him out but she had college and her share of looking after Anna. There was no way Edward would want social services getting involved which meant Emmett and Alice were probably his only option right now. She really hoped they'd be able to do some good as she knew how much he wouldn't want them there and with good reasons. If they came, they'd have to be damn sure they weren't going to have to up and leave or involve their parents. She didn't want to see Edward hurt like that again.

"I want to see daddy!" Lucy demanded, tired of the adults talking while her dad was alone and hurt somewhere nearby. She just wanted to go to him and was relieved when they left their conversations there and Carlisle led them along a couple of corridors before stopping outside the door to a room.

"Lucy your daddy is very ill right now. He's going to be fine but you have to be careful with him and you won't be able to hug him yet. Do you understand?" Carlisle warned her before he let them all into Edward's room. Normally it would be family only but given there was no one else there for Lucy he'd let Garrett and Bella go with her. Lucy nodded but started to look even more upset than before at that news so Carlisle opened the door to let her in. She ran right over to the side of Edward's bed and climbed onto the chair sitting there so she could see him properly. Heeding Carlisle's warning she kept her distance and just looked at him. He didn't look as bad as she'd been expecting, there was a bandage wrapped around his head, making his hair stick out oddly from the top of it, a couple of scratches on his face and his arm was in a sling but that was it. There weren't the many bruises she'd become used to seeing and for a moment she was confused as to why she couldn't hug him but then she noticed the tubes going into his nose and the grating noise Garrett had noticed earlier with his breathing. Something was wrong with him that she couldn't see and she turned to Carlisle wanting to know what it was but was distracted by Bella. She was standing at the foot of Edward's bed her eyes wide and a hand held in front of her mouth in shock.

"Bella?" She asked, standing up on the chair and holding her arms out. Bella jerked out from staring at Edward and understood what Lucy wanted straightaway so crossed over to the chair and lifted her up before settling back down in it with Lucy on her knee. Lucy might not have noticed it, but lying there in the hospital bed Edward looked incredible frail. What she'd always seen before as a lean build now seemed emaciated and his pale skin looked more translucent. He looked so ill that she knew what ever was wrong with him wasn't just from another beating and she wondered how she hadn't noticed it before. She could understand now why Carlisle was so insistent that they contact his family, there could be no denying that he needed help and unfortunately for him that was going to mean she had to call his brother and sister.

"We had to sedate him, so he won't wake for another hour or so." Carlisle told them before turning from the room to leave them in piece but Garrett followed him.

"Are you sure you can't tell us what's wrong with him? You heard Bella, he's not on speaking terms with his family, he's more likely to want us to know than them. Lucy wants to know, you can easily see how confused she is and how are we meant to reassure her if we don't even know what's going on with him?" Garrett pleaded with him, he'd seen the same thing Bella had and it felt like they'd let him down. He just wanted to know what he could do to help fix it and while Lucy was being incredibly brave it was only a matter of time before she broke. He'd seen the confusion on her face as she looked at her dad and he didn't want to let Edward down further by being unable to comfort her.

"You know I can't break patient confidentiality like that. You being my cousin doesn't alter that and I don't even know who that girl, Bella, is. Get his family down here, I need to speak to them." Carlisle replied sternly. He wished he could tell them, he knew Garrett cared about Edward and Lucy and it had been obvious Bella cared about them too but that didn't alter the fact that they weren't related to him.

"He left Lucy in her care, he obviously trusts Bella. I didn't even know he had any family yet she knows how to contact them." Garrett argued but he knew it was a lost battle. Carlisle went by the book and nothing he could say would change that.

"Convince her to call them and come find me when they get here. If he wakes up press the call button and try to keep him calm, I don't want to have to sedate him again." Carlisle left him standing in the corridor and headed for his office. He hoped they'd get Edward's family there soon and it wasn't just for Edward's sake. He'd had his suspicions since the first time he'd met Edward and Lucy and maybe meeting his brother or sister would reveal something before he called his wife. If he was who he thought then he needed to know as soon as possible, he just needed to know for sure before they could act.

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><p>Garrett stepped back into Edward's room to find Bella had helped Lucy up onto the side of his bed where she was now sitting holding his hand being careful to avoid touching him anywhere else. Bella was still in the chair but when she heard the door open she stood and stroked Lucy's hair catching her attention.<p>

"Talk to him so he knows you're here Luce. I'm just going to talk to Garrett for a minute." She said and Lucy nodded before starting to quietly tell Edward about her sleepover. Bella left her too it and walked over to the door where Garrett was still standing.

"Did he tell you anything else?" She asked causing Garrett to sigh and shake his head.

"He's sticking to the rules. Says to find him when Edward's family get here or if he wakes up and that's it. Sorry for not introducing you by the way, I was more concerned with how Edward is. He's Dr. Carlisle Cullen, my cousin." Garrett explained.

"That's ok, I was too. Guess I better go ring Jasper then, he's Edward's sister's boyfriend. He should be able to get hold of them for us. He's really not going to like this." She sighed glancing back over to the bed where Edward was propped up in a sitting position which seemed kind of strange but she assumed there was a reason for it. Seeing him like that she just wanted to hug him and find a way to make all his problems go away.

"Why?" Garrett was curious as to what was going on with Edward and his family. He was a good kid having a hard time and it seemed wrong that there was no one there for him. Edward had never mentioned family at all to him but it hadn't really occurred to him before now that they wouldn't just be a phone call away for him if he needed them. The fact he didn't have a single number stored for them in his phone suggested that whatever rift was between them was a big one.

"It's not my place to say really but they've let him down a lot in the past. He's learnt to function without them and he doesn't seem to like them turning up. Can't say I blame him really." Bella responded, a frown in place as she continued to looked towards Edward. What she knew about his family obviously wasn't pleasant but they were his family and Garrett was sure Carlisle would have a good reason for wanting them there.

"Carlisle is adamant we get them here."

"I know, I just hope he's ready for the upset it's going to cause. If he wants Edward calm this isn't going to help." She muttered before sighing and taking her phone out of her pocket. "Can you stay with Lucy while I go make the phone call? It'll only take a couple of minutes."

"Of course. I'm not leaving until somebody tells us what's wrong with him anyway." He answered so Bella slipped out of the room while Garrett took up residence in her vacated chair. Lucy didn't seem to notice as she continued talking to Edward while she traced patterns on the back on his right hand with her finger tips.

* * *

><p>Edward woke up to the sound of Lucy's voice. She was telling him something about ducks but her presence confused him. She was meant to be at Bella's house. There was a steady beeping sound coming from somewhere nearby and it was hurting his head. As he tried to open his eyes to see what was going on he felt distinctly foggy, like he wasn't quite connected to his body. It was hard to make his eyes open and when they finally did he had to close them again, the harsh white light being painful. He fought against his natural response, trying to open them again wanting to know where he was and what was going on. He could hear other voices around him now, one sounded like Bella and another like Garrett which confused him even further. It felt like he was lying down in a bed so he tried to move his arms to push himself up to be sitting only when he tried pain shot through his right side and chest and his left arm wouldn't move. Resigned to the fact he couldn't move his upper body the way he wanted he tried to lift his head up from the pillows only for a comforting hand to be placed on his forehead urging him to stay still.<p>

"Stay still Edward. You're in hospital. The Doctor will be here in a moment." Bella's voice gently told him and now that his eyes had got used to the bright light he could finally see the room he was in and realised his attempts at sitting up had been pointless as he appeared to be propped up in the bed anyway. Looking down at himself he could see the reason his left arm had refused to move was it was held in a sling. Not remembering anything about how he'd come to be where he was he looked first to Lucy who was sitting next to him and holding his hand, a hopeful expression on her face and then to Bella who was by the side of his bed. She was smiling but he could see the concern in her eyes.

"What happened?" His voice sounded slurred and before she could answer he was hit by a brutal coughing fit which left tears leaking from his eyes and Bella scrambling around to get him a glass of water.

"We don't know what happened. We were hoping you could tell us." Bella finally answered him as she held the glass and straw for him to take some small sips of water.

"Don't remember." He answered while scowling at how slurred his voice was. He didn't understand what was wrong with him. He felt Lucy playing with his fingers so let his gaze drop to her, instantly wanting to pull her into a hug but when he lifted his right arm to try and encourage her closer she shook her head at him.

"You're too hurt." She told him, remembering Dr. Carlisle's warning and not wanting to cause him anymore pain.

"No I'm not, come here baby." She looked at him doubtfully before looking to Bella.

"You're doctor said she couldn't Edward. I'd listened to him if I were you." She commented trying to help Lucy out. It was obvious she didn't want to hurt her dad but Edward was getting agitated which wouldn't do him any good either. Edward sighed and was about to start arguing again when the door to his room opened and a nurse came in followed by Carlisle.

"Hi Edward, how are you feeling?" Carlisle asked earning himself a scowl from Edward.

"What's wrong with me?" He asked totally ignoring what he thought was a pretty stupid question. Carlisle probably knew how he felt better than he did.

"Are you ok with Bella, Garrett and Lucy hearing this?" He asked to which Edward nodded, they'd probably have to find out what was wrong with him whether Carlisle told them or not. If they wouldn't even let Lucy hug him he assumed he'd be stuck with them fussing over him for a while anyway. He wished he hadn't nodded when the action made his head swim and the urge to vomit appear.

"Ok, well you've got a concussion from the wound on the back of your head, your left shoulder was dislocated and the 7th rib on your right side is broken, the ones around it are bruised. On top of that you've developed secondary pneumonia and you're underweight and anaemic. That all basically means breathing is going to be difficult and painful, you're going to get tired very easily and for the next month or so you're going to have to do nothing but rest." Carlisle informed him and they could all see the arguments brewing behind his eyes. He had a daughter to look after, he didn't care how sick they said he was, taking that much time out of work was a total no go.

"That means total rest Edward, not the kind you seem to think I meant when I saw you for your flu. If you'd listened to me then and got someone to help you out you wouldn't be here now. You've run yourself down to the ground, exhausted your immune system and that let bacteria get into your lungs and develop into pneumonia. Whatever happened to you last night was just the final straw. I'm keeping you in here for a least a couple of days, and then I want you to find someone to help you out when you go home otherwise you're just going to end up back here." Carlisle tried to head the argument off but Edward frowned at him.

"I can't stay here." He argued nodding towards Lucy. There was no one else to look after her.

"I can take her for the rest of the weekend, Mum won't mind." Bella volunteered drawing Edward's attention to her and she saw some of the fight go out of him to be replaced by sadness. He hated this but he knew Lucy would be ok with Bella and if he stayed in the hospital for the weekend then maybe they'd let him go home and things could go back to normal.

"Thank you." He mumbled to her surprising both Garret and Carlisle with how easily he'd given in to that. Either he was feeling worse than he looked or he really did trust Bella with Lucy.

"Ok now that's sorted, we've got you on antibiotics to try and clear the infection, and painkillers so you can breathe a little easier, that's also why you're sitting up. You're also on oxygen until your levels improve a little. Your fever is already going down so that's looking good and your ribs will heal with time and rest. Someone will be along to talk to you about your diet but we'll discuss that in more detail when your brother and sister get here since they'll need to hear that too." Carlisle continued only for Edward's eyes to go wide and his breathing to get erratic.

"I don't want them here!" He complained, wondering how they'd even managed to get hold of them. They were the last people he wanted to see. He could just imagine what his dad would have to say about him when he found out what had happened.

"Edward you're going to need a lot of help when you go home, family are the best people for that." Carlisle argued, he wasn't going to back down on this. He did not want to see Edward back in hospital in another couple of weeks

"Not my family. How did you even find them?"

"Sorry, I called Jasper. I told them you wouldn't want them here but you need help." Bella admitted quietly earning her a disgruntled glare.

"Call him back and tell them not to come. I'll be fine." Edward demanded, she'd had no right to call them in the first place. He wanted to be angry at her but she looked so apologetic that he could tell she hadn't wanted to call them in the first place so he switched his glare back to Carlisle.

"No you won't. If you don't want them here give us someone else to call. You need somebody to look after you and Lucy. If you can't give us someone then I'll have to call social services." Carlisle hated being this harsh but it was for the best. Edward sighed, giving in. There was no one else to call and he certainly didn't want social services involved, he couldn't take the chance they'd decide he was an unfit parent and take Lucy away. With his anger flaring up his breathing was trying to prove Carlisle's words right. The pain from his broken rib and pneumonia was fighting against whatever painkillers they'd given him and he just didn't have the energy for this. It wasn't like Carlisle would have any say in what he did as soon as he got out of the hospital anyway. If Emmett and Alice did turn up he could just lock them out of his flat. Fighting right now was pointless and painful so he let them think they'd won.

"Can you remember what happened last night?" Carlisle changed the subject. His injuries although not his major problem right now, were still a concern. He'd been covered in bruises the last time he'd seen Edward and Garrett had said it wasn't the first time. If someone had attacked him again they'd need to involve the police.

"No." Edward didn't want to answer any questions and although he could probably guess who had caused his injuries he couldn't actually remember any of it. The last thing he could remember was saying goodbye to Garrett outside the pub.

"That's probably due to your concussion. It should come back to you in a day or so." It wasn't surprising that he couldn't remember it but it was unfortunate. Seeing that Edward wasn't going to comment any further and appeared to have had enough of talking, Carlisle checked the chart the nurse handed to him and deciding everything seemed as good as they could hope for right now he left them to it promising to come back later on. Glad Carlisle was gone, Edward turned his attention back to Lucy who was being uncharacteristically quiet as she continued to play with his hand.

"You ok baby?" He asked wishing he could hug her but even trying to lift his arm slightly to brush her hair away from her face angered his broken rib. She stared back at him and he could see that she wanted that hug just as much as he did.

"Love you Daddy." She said before leaning down and hugging his arm. It was torture not being able to comfort her.

"Love you too Luce." He responded before feeling drips of moisture land on his arm. Having managed to stay brave all the time he was unconscious finally seeing him awake and talking to her was enough to push Lucy to tears and he was helpless to do anything for her.

"Don't cry sweetheart. I'm ok I promise and you get to have an extra long sleepover with Bella and Anna." He tried to comfort her but it didn't seem to do much good as she just tightened her hold on his arm. Watching the tortured expression on Edward's face as Lucy cried Bella knew they'd have to intervene before he tried to move and hurt himself further so she stood from the chair and placed a hand on Lucy's back, rubbing soothing circles.

"Lucy there's no need to cry. We're all going to take really good care of your Daddy and you'll be able to hug him again in no time." She promised and they all heard Lucy sniffle as her tears started to calm down. Letting go of Edward's arm she sat up again to look at Bella.

"Will you look after him?" She asked and there would have been no way Bella could have refused the pleading look on Lucy's face even if she hadn't already been planning on doing everything she could to help them.

"We all will." Bella responded and satisfied that she was telling the truth Lucy held her arms out for a hug. Bella lifted her up then sat down on the edge of Edward's bed with Lucy on her lap so that she could reclaim Edward's hand but still have the comfort of a hug. Glancing to Edward, Bella smiled softly as he watched them both. He didn't look quite so tortured now Lucy was no longer crying but there was a longing in his eyes she didn't think would be leaving until he was well enough to be out of the hospital bed. She hoped he wouldn't push himself too hard trying to get better before he was ready but she already knew he would. He was not going to be an easy patient to care for.

Having stood back and just watched the interactions in the room Garrett decided it was time to try and get some answers from Edward. They knew what was wrong with him now but that hadn't explained how any of it had happened. Considering how against his family being there he was, if they wanted any chance at all of getting responses from Edward they were going to have to try and get them out of him before his brother and sister turned up. Moving away from the wall he'd been leant against he went across to Bella's empty chair and sat down, immediately drawing everyone's attention.

"I told you should have seen Carlisle about that cough." He started, he'd known Edward had been lying all the times he'd told him he was fine but he'd let him convince him it was nothing to worry about. Now he didn't understand why Edward had let it progress to this. He'd offered help, Edward should have taken it.

"I did too." Bella added remembering how badly out of breath he'd been outside of Jasper's flat and the resulting coughing fits.

"I didn't think it was serious. When I get ill it always drains me, it was nothing too unusual." Edward explained. He was too tired for this, he didn't want to have to explain himself or argue anymore. All he wanted to do was curl up with Lucy and fall asleep but Garrett didn't seem satisfied yet.

"That's probably because you're underweight. Thinking about it now you never eat lunch at work do you?" He asked, he didn't want to berate Edward while he was ill but he had to understand that he couldn't go on the way he had been and they needed to know just how serious his problems were if they wanted to help him.

"I don't get hungry." Over the years his appetite had steadily decreased. To begin with his struggles with budgeting had caused him to get used to missing meals or only eating small amounts. By the time he'd managed to get the hang of budgeting and he had enough money for food shopping he was so used to it that his appetite didn't seem to change back. Recently the stress of everything that had been going on had totally stolen what remained of his appetite. None of it had been intentional but it was an old habit now and he was going to have to make a conscious effort to break it.

"He never has breakfast." Lucy chipped in as she'd always thought it was strange that he made a big deal out of her eating all her breakfast yet he usually only had a mug of coffee. Garrett and Bella just stared at Edward. It was no wonder he was so slim if he was only eating one meal a day.

"It's not a big deal." Edward sighed seeing the looks on their faces. He'd never been a big fan of breakfast even when he still lived at home.

"Not a big deal? If it was Lucy skipping meals wouldn't that be a big deal?" Garrett asked incredulously. Edward was lying in a hospital bed with an illness that had taken hold due to his poor immune system and he was declaring the cause of that to be nothing. He was either stupid or extremely deluded and Garrett had never thought Edward to be stupid. He seemed to have no concept what so ever of how to look after himself.

"That's different." Edward grumbled.

"No it's not. You've got to start looking after yourself better. You'll be no good to Lucy if you keep getting ill." Garrett argued.

"I'll work on it. Can we drop this now, I'm tired." Edward muttered, it was getting harder to keep his eyes open and he didn't like the way Garrett was talking to him. He knew he'd screwed up, they didn't have to keep staring at him like he was an idiot.

"For now. Get some sleep, I'll take Lucy to get something to eat." Garrett responded, standing up and holding his hand out for Lucy. She looked from Garrett to Edward then finally to Bella who understood her hesitation.

"I'll stay with him." She promised so Lucy kissed Edward's hand then let Bella help her off the bed and took Garrett's hand. After a sleepy sounding goodbye from Edward, Garrett led her to the door before he stopped and glanced back at Edward.

"You know, asking for help when you need it is nothing to be ashamed of." He commented before letting the door close behind them.

"He's right you know." Bella commented as she settled back into her chair and Edward turned to look at her with tired eyes.

"I'm used to there being no one to ask." He mumbled feeling his eyes start to close against his will, the drugs in his system pulling him under.

"Well there is now." He heard Bella respond before he assumed he'd fallen asleep as he could have sworn he felt her gently squeeze his hand.

* * *

><p>"...you didn't tell us!"<p>

"He asked us not to and don't get me started on what you didn't tell..."

"...he's our brother! Of course we cared..."

"Would you guys stop arguing! You're going to wake him up." Bella's exasperated voice dragged Edward back to full consciousness but he refused to open his eyes knowing exactly who was arguing around him. His head hurt, his shoulder ached and he was convinced he could feel the movement of his broken rib with each breath. He wondered if it was time for a new dose of painkillers but he'd have to admit to being awake to ask and he did not want to speak to Jasper, Alice or Emmett.

"Who are you? Why are you even here?" He heard Emmett ask and the charade of being asleep was hard to keep up when he heard him speak to Bella like that.

"Bella Swan. I called Jasper so you can stop looking at me like that. You wouldn't even know he was in here if it wasn't for me and I can tell you now he wishes you didn't." It seemed he'd touched a nerve as Bella held her own against him, "If you're going to continue acting like a spoilt little child you can leave right now. Edward needs help and support, not aggravation and hurt."

"I'm sorry, it's just a shock seeing him like this. Who are you to him?" Edward could hear the curiosity in Emmett's voice now the anger had calmed down and he wasn't sure which was worse; he knew exactly what conclusion Emmett would come to as to why Bella was there.

"I'm a friend. Lucy was staying at my house with my little sister last night." Bella responded.

"Where is Lucy?" The usual happiness that Alice's voice radiated was missing and it almost made Edward open his eyes when he heard the slight waver to it suggesting repressed tears.

"In the canteen with Edward's boss, Garrett." If they were still there he couldn't have been asleep for very long, he wondered if that was why everything seemed to be hurting so much more.

"You can join them if you want now we're here." That was Emmett again and Edward prayed Bella didn't listen. He did not want to be left alone with his family.

"I'm staying here, I promised Lucy I would and I'm not going to leave you here alone with him until he's awake." Bella replied and he was grateful for how she seemed to know what he'd want. He'd much rather have her there than them.

"Bella maybe we should step out for a while, they are his family." Jasper spoke up making Edward frown in his supposed sleep.

"No way, I saw what their last reunion did to Edward. I'm not going anywhere until he says so." Bella responded vehemently and Edward was grateful yet confused by her apparent protectiveness. He hadn't expected that.

"What do you mean?" Alice asked sounding totally baffled.

"That night you guys let him walk away from your parent's house? I found him and Lucy sitting on a bench in the middle of nowhere totally lost with no way of getting home. He looked terrible and he got sick a couple of days after that. If you're intending to stay here now you better be a hundred percent sure that you're not going to have to walk away from him or let him run from you again."

"I know I screwed up with that but I'm not going to do that again. I'm here for as long as he needs us." Emmett replied sounding properly chastised but Edward knew that was a lie. As soon as their dad found out where Emmett was and what he was doing he'd force Emmett to choose and he knew he'd go back to their parents. He couldn't blame him for that but it was why he couldn't accept their help. Emmett may have had good intentions but that wouldn't stop the hurt that was sure to follow them.

"Good. I swear I'll find some way to make you regret it if you let him down again."

That seemed to be the end of their arguing as their voices settled down to normal levels and they started talking about what Dr. Cullen had said was wrong with him. No longer interested in their conversation and able to ignore their lowered voices, Edward felt himself drift off to sleep again.

* * *

><p>Edward had been sleeping for most of the afternoon. Emmett, Alice and Jasper had turned up shortly after Garrett had taken Lucy to get something to eat. They hadn't made a very good impression on Bella as they'd come crashing through Edward's door arguing amongst themselves. Jasper had apparently told them about Edward being at his flat and they hadn't taken the fact he'd kept it quiet very well. He in turn had been throwing back their lies at them and Bella had been certain they'd wake Edward. Thankfully Edward didn't stir and they'd all settled down. Bella had explained as best she could what Carlisle had told them earlier and after sitting in the room for a while they'd decided to go and find him themselves to get more details. That had been half an hour ago and now Garrett and Lucy had returned so Bella filled them in on Edward's family's arrival. Lucy didn't seem too bothered as she sat on Edward's bed with a colouring book and pencils that Garrett had found in the hospital gift shop for her. As Lucy coloured Bella and Garrett had moved on to comparing what they knew, trying to figure out who was hurting Edward. His main problem may have been pneumonia but someone had still attacked him. Neither of them knew anything but as Bella thought about it the red haired woman from the park came to mind. Edward had seemed scared of her, and had warned her off from going near her. As she described her to Garrett he thought she sounded familiar and remembered the couple he'd seen follow Edward and Lucy home when he'd worked late.<p>

"That's Vicky." Lucy announced as she continued colouring in. They'd both assumed she was too preoccupied to be listening too closely but now they realised she had been paying attention they both looked to her wondering how much she knew about what was going on.

"Who's Vicky?" Bella asked making Lucy look up at her and roll her eyes.

"The woman in the park you're talking about." She explained. Her daddy didn't like people asking questions but they'd said they were going to help him so she thought it would be ok to tell them. Someone needed to stop them hurting her daddy.

"How do you know her Lucy?" Garrett asked, Edward had definitely never mentioned anybody with that name to him.

"She was there when they chased Daddy and she was in our flat."

"When was she there?" Bella wondered, Edward had said he didn't know her but if Lucy knew her name and she'd been in their flat surely he did.

"When Daddy got hurt the first time."

"What was she doing there? Did she talk to your daddy?" Bella asked.

"No he wasn't there. She was looking for something." Lucy missed their startled expressions at the fact Edward hadn't been there as she continued to colour in the flower she was working on.

"Where was he Lucy? Was she meant to be there?" Garrett asked, he didn't think Edward would ever leave Lucy on her own but if what Bella had said about him appearing scared of the woman was true he didn't think he'd have willingly left Lucy alone with her either. Lucy looked up then and noticed Garrett and Bella were both staring at her. She shook her head in response to his question but didn't explain any further. From the way they were looking at her she wondered if she'd said something she shouldn't have and she glanced to her daddy wishing he was awake. She wanted to help him but she didn't really know what she could and couldn't tell people and she was worried now that she'd said too much.

Bella and Garrett tried asking her a few more questions but she refused to answer and just shook her head or shrugged so they gave up. It seemed the red head had something to do with what was happening to Edward though and as she was the only lead they had they'd both be keeping an eye out for her. Alice and Jasper returned to the room not long after and explained that Emmett was trying to arrange time off work and a cover story for their parents so that he could stay with Edward for a while once he was out of hospital. Bella approved of the fact he was obviously trying to help and not just planning to visit occasionally but she still felt a little apprehensive about their presence, unsure of just how badly Edward was going to react when he woke up to find them there.

When Emmett joined them Garrett decided it was time for him to leave. Edward's room was way too crowded and he needed to get back to the shop in time to close up anyway. He knew Edward would be ok with Bella there and if Emmett was planning on staying with Edward he was sure he'd get another chance to get to know him and Alice. He said goodbye to them all and asked Bella to let Edward know to call him if he needed anything before going to Carlisle's office to say goodbye. When he peered through the partially open door he could see Carlisle staring at a file, tapping a pen against his desk, totally lost in thought. He knocked on the door, making Carlisle jump and drop his pen.

"Hey, just thought I'd say bye. I've got to get back to the shop. What's got you thinking so hard?" He asked wandering into the room and sitting down in the chair opposite Carlisle. A glance at his desk and name on top of the file Carlisle had been staring at immediately caught his eye – Edward Anthony Masen.

"Nothing really, just something I need to sort out." He replied distractedly as he closed the file and dropped it into his desk drawer. "How's Edward doing with his family here?"

"He's not woken up to see them yet. Bella's still there with them so he'll probably be ok, she seems to help him stay calm."

"Hmm, I'll check in on them soon." Carlisle commented still seeming distracted. Getting the impression he'd rather be left to his own devices Garrett stood and headed for the door.

"Right, I better go. Say hello to Esme for me and ring me if Edward needs anything."

"Ok, will do." Carlisle responded but his attention had already moved to his phone leaving Garrett unconvinced as to whether he'd been paying attention to what he'd said. He was glad he'd left his number with Bella, at least he knew she'd call him.

* * *

><p>When Edward next woke up it was to find the number of chairs in his room had multiplied. Bella was still sitting in her chair next to his bed but now Jasper was sitting in an uncomfortable looking plastic chair next to her and it sounded like they were discussing college work. On his other side Emmett looked slightly ridiculous perched on another of the plastic chairs. He made it look like it should have been in a school classroom and could collapse at any moment. Alice was next to him chatting to Lucy who was still in her spot on the end of his bed with a colouring book.<p>

"Hey, how you feeling?" Bella was the first to notice he was awake as she broke off her conversation with Jasper and reached for the glass of water she'd got for him before. He gratefully sipped from it but it didn't help the clogged feeling in his chest.

"Sore." He answered her question making her frown a little.

"Do you want me to go find a nurse, see if you can have some more pain killers?" She asked, already half out of her chair but Jasper reached forward and touched her arm getting her to stay still.

"I'll go." He said quietly before standing and leaving, knowing that Edward would probably rather Bella stay where she was. He didn't want to make things any harder for him and he already knew seeing Alice and Emmett there would do exactly that.

"Hey Edward." Emmett tried tentatively but Edward showed no response and was instead focussed on Lucy.

"What you got there Lucy?" He asked, wondering what she was colouring in. She smiled at him before lifting the book up to show him the bunch of flowers she'd been carefully colouring. He smiled at her, she must have been concentrating hard on it as she hadn't gone over the lines at all.

"That's really good sweetheart." She grinned at him before closing the colouring book and shuffling over a little so she could grab hold of his hand again. He squeezed her hand gently as it was the closest they'd get to a hug

"What time's it?" Edward asked, looking to Bella for an answer. Garrett wasn't there anymore and he wondered if that meant it was getting late. If it was Lucy would be wanting her dinner soon and he knew Bella probably ought to be taking her home but he didn't want either of them to leave.

"Urm, six thirty. Guess I maybe ought to be getting Lucy home for some dinner." Bella answered after digging her phone out of her pocket and thinking along the same lines as Edward. She looked to Edward and could see how unhappy that thought made him but then he glanced to Lucy and smiled again as she was watching him.

"That's probably a good idea." He agreed but Lucy shook her head.

"I don't want to go." She complained looking from him to Bella. She really didn't want to leave her daddy, he always stayed with her when she was ill and she wanted to do the same for him.

"I know sweetheart but you can't stay here and you like Bella's house. I'll be fine here I promise." Edward tried to reason with her. He hated the idea just as much as she did but she couldn't stay at the hospital overnight and he'd rather have her having fun with Bella and Anna than sitting there worrying over him. He'd most likely be sleeping most the time anyway.

"We'll be here so he won't be alone." Emmett joined in making Edward scowl at him as Lucy looked at him warily.

"You make him cry." She accused taking Emmett and Alice by surprise. She'd been perfectly fine with them while Edward was asleep. Alice had spent most of the afternoon talking to her and trying to get to know her and she'd shown no hostility towards either of them. Now though she was eying Emmett like he was going to get up and hit Edward at any moment. Edward couldn't deny her words as they were true but Lucy had to go with Bella and if she was worrying about him he knew she wouldn't.

"We'll be ok Lucy. They're here to help me. You go with Bella and have fun so you can tell me all about it tomorrow." He suggested, stroking the back of her hand with his thumb. She narrowed her eyes at Emmett for a moment longer before turning back to Edward and smiling slightly.

"Ok. I love you Daddy."

"I love you too baby." He responded and she kissed his hand before scrambling off his bed and collecting her colouring book.

"Why don't you leave that here for when we come back to visit tomorrow?" Bella suggested when she saw Lucy collecting it up. Lucy stopped what she was doing to grin up at her as she handed the colouring book to her. Bella smiled back and set it down on the table that held Edward's water glass. Edward watched what she was doing and as she put it down he spotted his wallet and keys had been placed there as well. Staring at them he realised Lucy would need more clothes for her stay at Bella's house.

"You should take my keys, get some more things for Lucy from the flat." He told Bella who looked back at him a little surprised. He hated the idea of her seeing where he lived but Lucy would need more clothes and she always came first.

"Ok, is there anything you'd like us to bring you tomorrow?" She asked, picking up his keys and staring at them. He'd said very little about where he lived to her and she was still surprised he was going to allow her to go into his flat without him even being there.

"Just get Lucy's things." He was hoping to just spend the majority of his time in hospital sleeping and ignoring Emmett and Alice. He didn't need anything from home for that.

"Don't be silly, you'll feel better with some of your own things around. Jasper and I can go with you and pick some things up then get a taxi back here." Alice interrupted forcing Edward to glance to her although he didn't comment.

"Ok then. Well we better get going I guess." Bella muttered awkwardly, she didn't really want to take Alice and Jasper with her. Not only was she still not convinced on Alice and Emmett being around she was certain Edward would not like her and Jasper poking around in his home but she also thought Alice was right, he would feel better with some of his things there even if it was just a favourite t-shirt or book and if Alice and Jasper were with her at least he'd only have Emmett to deal with for a while.

"We'll be back tomorrow morning. Feel better." She lightly patted his uninjured shoulder before taking Lucy's hand and leaving with Alice following behind them. He watched them go before closing his eyes, wondering where Jasper had got to with finding a nurse. Now Bella and Lucy were gone he had no distraction from the pain and it was beginning to affect his breathing as it hurt too much to take a normal breath.

"You ok?" Emmett asked having noticed his breathing getting shallower. Edward didn't respond causing Emmett to sigh and run a hand through his hair. He could understand why Edward didn't want him there, he knew he'd majorly messed up when he'd taken him to their parents' house but he hadn't meant to. All he'd ever wanted to do was get his little brother back. Seeing him so ill he couldn't help but feel he should have been there for him and done his best to prevent anyone from harming him, including himself. Dr. Cullen had explained to both him and Alice exactly what was wrong with Edward and how it had happened along with what it would take to get him back to full health. He couldn't believe Edward had let himself get so ill without trying to get help earlier and knowing that he'd probably helped to cause his illness was horrible. He'd felt bad at the time when he'd just let Edward walk away from their parents' house and hadn't gone after him to try and patch things over but he felt so much worse now. It was obvious then from the fading bruises he had had that things were hard for him and he was getting trouble from someone and he should have done more to find out what was going on. What had happened to Edward, Emmett wouldn't want to happen to anyone, never mind his own brother. He should have made sure he was in Edward's life, right from the day their parents had chucked him out, he should have been there for him, making sure he was ok and everything was fine. Instead he'd done as he was told and left Edward to struggle on his own for far too long. He was determined to change that now.

"Listen I know I screwed up and I'm unbelievably sorry for that. I'm not going anywhere this time and I don't care if you ignore me. I'm staying put until you're better and even then I want to stay in your life. I've taken time off work and Mum and Dad think I've gone on a last minute holiday so I'm going to stay with you for a while whether you want me to or not. I'm not letting this go on, you're my little brother and it's time I started acting like it. You don't have to talk to me if you don't want to, I understand but I'll be here." He knew Edward wouldn't be able to trust him but he wanted him to know what he was thinking. They had to start somewhere and that was as good a place as any. He wasn't going to let Edward down any more. No one was going to hurt his little brother again, if they did they'd have him to answer to and he was proud to say his bulky muscles weren't just for show.

Edward didn't say a word. He listened to what Emmett said but he didn't believe it. Emmett may have meant it but he knew that when their dad found out he'd put a stop to Emmett's intentions so as far as he was concerned Emmett wasn't there. The nurse Jasper had gone to find appeared then and after checking over the machines he was connected to, she fiddled with something connected to his I.V. and he felt the fog taking over again. As the pain dulled he could finally take a deep breath and it helped him relax enough that when his eyes fell shut he was asleep in seconds.

Edward didn't wake again until the middle of the night and when he did, it was to the familiar feeling of someone watching him. He could hear Emmett snoring from Bella's usual chair and as he looked around the room there was no one else there to be watching him. Starting to feel uneasy he looked to the window beside the door and was suddenly wide awake when he thought he saw his mother's face. He blinked and she was gone making him wonder if he'd imagined it. All his thoughts were forgotten when he started coughing, effectively waking Emmett who fluttered around in a panic wanting to do something to help but unsure as to what. Eventually the coughing subsided, leaving Edward exhausted and in pain once more. Seeing the grimace on his face Emmett finally realised what he needed and left to track down a nurse.

As the pain medication filtered through Edward's system once more, sleep reclaimed him and Emmett watched him, wishing he knew what to do to make his brother's life easier and take his pain away.


	22. Chapter 20 Healing

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

AN - Thank you to everyone who is reading this, especialy those who have reviewed. I really appreciate it.

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><p><strong>Chapter 20 - Healing<strong>

The car ride from the hospital to Edward's flat block was awkward at best. Bella concentrated on driving, trying to ignore Alice's insistent chatter from the back as she tried to talk to Lucy. Lucy seemed to have become shy and unsure once away from Edward and no longer wanted to talk yet Alice didn't seem to be getting the hint. Jasper sat quietly in the passenger seat, easily reading the tension in Bella's posture but unsure what to do to ease it. He knew there would be no shutting Alice up. She'd never been good with silence and always felt the need to fill it. Having a million and one questions for Lucy she had decided now was the time to get the answers. Lucy just shrugged, nodded or shook her head in response while cuddling her doll which had been left in the back of the car in their hurry to get into the hospital and find Edward that morning.

When the car was finally parked Bella was relieved to get out of the confined space and wasted no time in helping Lucy out, leaving Jasper to try and figure out how to lift his seat forward for Alice to climb out. The sight of the building in front of them was what finally managed to quiet Alice. As she climbed out of the car and turned to see it for the first time Bella saw her eyes go wide in shock before something that looked awfully like disgust flashed across her face. That made Bella irrationally angry and she turned her back on Alice, grabbing Lucy's hand and urging her to lead them to their flat. They climbed up the stairs, bypassing the broken down lift and Alice continued to look around, apparently appalled by what she was seeing. Bella had to make an effort to hold her tongue as she didn't think yelling at her would do any of them any good but the way she was looking down on where Edward lived when it was the best that he could do made her furious. It was as far removed as you could get from Alice's world by the looks of her designer clothes but Edward no longer had any kind of luxuries in his life and that wasn't his fault. Lucy came to a stop outside the cleanest door they'd seen in the entire building so Bella got Edward's keys out of her pocket and let them all in.

The inside of the flat was a lot better than the rest of the building. It was clean and tidy but well worn. It was obvious Edward tried to make it nice and when Lucy showed them her room Bella wasn't at all surprised to see that everything in it was in a much better condition than the rest of the flat. It had even been decorated. Lucy brightened up considerably as she showed Bella around her room and Bella felt herself calm down as Lucy smiled. Even Alice got a smile as she commented on how lovely Lucy's dresses were. Bella helped Lucy decide what to pack and seeing a clean school uniform hung up in her wardrobe Bella added that to the pile so she'd be able to take Lucy to school on Monday morning.

Realising they needed something to pack everything into Bella asked Lucy if she knew where any bags were. Lucy shrugged before grabbing Bella's hand and tugging her through to Edward's room. After glancing around quickly Lucy dropped to the floor and crawled under his bed to look for a bag while Bella stared at the room. Alice had followed them and this time she wasn't the only one looking around sadly. It was a perfect representation of the man who owned it, worn out and neglected. It wasn't as tidy as the rest of the flat, although even the clutter was sparse. Bella got the impression that although Edward cared for the rest of the flat he didn't bother with his own room. Clothes were scattered across the floor and she wondered if maybe they should tidy it up a little for when he got out of hospital. Alice seemed to have the same idea as she started picking up some of the clothes and putting them into the half empty wash basket that sat in the corner. Lucy reappeared from under the bed dragging a duffel bag behind her and totally oblivious to Bella and Alice's sadness.

"Do you want to pick some things you think your daddy would like to have with him?" Bella asked her although looking around she wasn't sure there was anything there he'd be attached to. There didn't seem to be any books or gadgets, just dirty clothes and some of Lucy's toys. Lucy however nodded and headed for a chest of drawers. She pulled the top drawer open and peered in before shuffling the contents around and pulling out the same t-shirt Edward had been wearing the last time he'd been to Bella's house. Throwing that onto Edward's bed she then went round to his bedside table and picked up a photograph that she chucked on top of the t-shirt. Bella wandered over to see what it was of while Lucy vanished back into her own room. Alice joined Bella by the bed and they both stared at the picture of a slightly younger Edward holding onto a giggling toddler version of Lucy. It was slightly squint, leading Bella to believe Edward had taken it himself but the looks on their faces made it not matter. Lucy was the picture of happiness while Edward was looking at her with total adoration. Bella recognised the local park in the background as they stood by the duck pond and she wondered if that was the cause for Lucy's giggles. It wasn't framed but from the dog eared edges it was obviously a well loved photograph. She turned to Alice when she caught movement out of the corner of her eye and found Alice wiping at her eyes.

"I can't believe this is where he lives." Alice muttered and Bella's anger was quick to return as she remembered the way Alice had been looking down at everything since seeing the flat block.

"He's doing his best." Bella responded and surprised at the venom present in her voice, Alice turned to her and studied her expression. The anger was very apparent, and although Alice hadn't been expecting it and realised Bella had misunderstood her she was pleased. Bella obviously cared for her brother and she was glad he had her in his life.

"I know, that's why it's so wrong. This shouldn't be his life." She said sadly as she looked around the room again seeing nothing that resembled the Edward she'd known.

"He doesn't have a choice by the sounds of things." Bella grumbled, still being annoyed by Alice's reaction to everything although she could hear the sorrow in Alice's voice now which helped calm the anger slightly.

"Well I think it's about time he did." Alice uttered, suddenly brightening as a look of determination crossed her face. Without any further explanation she left the room to find out where Jasper had wandered off to. Edward may have been cut off from their family's wealth but her and Emmett weren't. She knew Emmett would probably have to be careful to avoid raising suspicions with their parent's but she'd always been able to get away with anything. They never questioned where she spent her time, or the length of her credit card bills. She knew Edward wouldn't let her change everything but she could make what he had better. Jasper could help her plan but she knew the first thing they'd have to do was get the flat ready for his return. She'd get it tidied and cleaned and make sure the kitchen was fully stocked. Edward was stubborn and proud and considering how hard he was trying to push them away she knew he'd fight against them looking after him, so there had to be nothing that needed doing when he got home so he'd have no choice but to rest.

Bella watched Alice leave the room and hoped whatever she was planning wasn't going to backfire on Edward. She didn't really know Alice but she did know how determined she could be and she wasn't used to being told no. It was why her and Jasper worked so well as she was the opposite to his quiet, easy going nature. Lucy brought her out of her thoughts a she reappeared with a fluffy teddy bear that she added to the small pile on Edward's bed.

"Are you sure you wouldn't rather keep that with you?" Bella asked, wondering if Edward would really want a teddy bear but Lucy shook her head.

"He makes me better when I'm ill, Daddy needs him." She answered simply before pulling Bella back to her own room to finish packing her things and knowing the logic behind the bear, Bella thought Edward would probably treasure it more than anything else they could take him.

Once they'd got everything Lucy needed packed Bella followed her through to the kitchen where they found Jasper stood watching Alice look through all the cupboards. Wondering what on earth Alice was doing Bella looked to Jasper who shrugged.

"She wanted to see what they needed. By the looks of it they were due a food shop and she wants to make sure they've got everything they could need for when Edward's home." He explained.

"Oh, I guess that makes sense." She wasn't sure Edward would appreciate it but it probably would do him good. "Is she nearly done? We're ready to get going."

"I think so. She's already got the things Lucy picked out and some more of his clothes packed for him."

"She knows he isn't going to like any of this right?" She asked as they watched her looking through the freezer. He needed it, that couldn't be questioned but he'd so far declined every offer of help that either she or Garrett had given and had only surrendered to her when she'd given him no choice and that was over something as little as a lift in Poppy. He was not going to like Alice and Emmett pretty much taking over his life for the next month or so. She was a little concerned as to what would happen when he realised just what Alice was doing. He was fiercely independent and Bella wasn't sure how well he was going to cope with that being taken away from him. This all had the potential to go extremely wrong. The more they tried, the harder Edward would push and that wasn't going to do any good for anyone.

"I was there when Dr. Cullen explained what was wrong with him. He may not like it but he needs this. He used to be really close with Alice, she'll win him over eventually just like she always does. Emmett may have more of a fight on his hands and he'll grumble at Alice for a while but she'll win in the end." Jasper answered but Bella still wasn't convinced. The only chance she thought they'd have with winning Edward over was if they got Lucy on their side. He'd follow her anywhere. Problem was that although Lucy was ok around them when Edward was there, her reaction when they'd made her leave the hospital showed how little she really trusted them. There was nothing she could do though, it had all been set in motion and all they could do now was wait and see what happened. Bella was going to make sure she kept visiting him though. He seemed to like her so hopefully she'd be able to help Lucy keep his spirits up when Emmett and Alice got on his nerves.

With a final look in the fridge Alice was ready to go. Jasper picked up the bag they'd packed for Edward while Alice called a taxi then Bella ushered everyone out of the flat and locked it. She kept hold of Edward's keys even though Alice said she could take them back to him. It didn't feel right to just hand them over when she knew how much Edward didn't want Alice and Emmett around. Considering Alice had obviously been planning she didn't think it was a good idea to let her have access to his home without him knowing.

They said their goodbyes at the front doors, Bella feeling slightly relieved to be getting away from Alice. It was probably unfair since she didn't really know her but Edward's less than enthusiastic response to her and then her reaction to his home had not left her feeling particularly friendly towards her. Lucy didn't offer her usual hugs but did wave once Bella had got her buckled into the booster seat and was pulling out of the car park.

The journey back to Bella's house was a lot more comfortable than the one from the hospital. Now it was just the two of them Lucy was back to being talkative. She was asking a lot of questions about her dad which Bella knew meant she was worrying about him. There was nothing that could be done about that though so Bella just answered them as best she could while trying to distract her by suggesting things they could have for dinner or games they could play with Anna.

By the time they were walking though Bella's front door Lucy seemed to have settled down from worrying and happily ran off with Anna up to her room to play leaving Bella to find Renee in the kitchen. Dropping Lucy's bag onto the kitchen table she accepted the offer of a cup of tea before explaining to Renee what had happened.

"Let him know Lucy's welcome to stay here until he's out of hospital" Renee commented once Bella had finished talking. She could tell her daughter cared a great deal about Edward and was worried about him so wanted to help They'd had such a lovely night when Lucy had stayed over anyway. She was a perfectly behaved little girl and she made Anna's moods at Phil not being around a lot easier to deal with so she had no problems with Lucy staying with them until Edward was out of hospital. It was also worth the smile on Bella's face when she suggested it.

"Thank you. I don't think he'd trust Emmett or Alice to look after her on their own."

"Well if he needs any help when home you don't need to ask. I'm happy to have Lucy here." Renee could imagine how hard this would be for Edward. She'd been young herself when Bella was born and she'd had the support of her husband and family. Considering how young Edward had been when he'd taken on the responsibility of being a single parent it was surprising he hadn't stumbled earlier. She'd only briefly met him but his love for Lucy had been blatantly apparent and from what Bella had said about him she could see, like Bella could, that his recovery was not going to be easy for him. He'd want to be the one taking care of Lucy and if having the excuse that she was just playing at a friend's would help him accept the help she was happy to help Bella provide that.

They ended up ordering pizza as neither Bella nor Renee felt like cooking. It had been a long day for everyone what with the early morning phone call from Garrett and given that they wanted to keep Lucy happily distracted they settled down in the living room for another girly sleep over. Anna didn't notice anything wrong and just enjoyed the night and while Lucy seemed happy the majority of the night it didn't escape Bella's attention that she was a lot quieter than she had been the night before. When the girls were finally exhausted and the sleeping bags and pillows had been pulled out Bella was surprised to find Lucy cuddling up beside her instead of choosing the spot beside Anna like she had the night before. She didn't question it though and instead just wrapped an arm loosely around her offering the comfort she was seeking. It didn't take long for Lucy to fall asleep but Bella found herself kept awake wondering how Edward was doing with Emmett and Alice. She hoped he wouldn't end up hating her for phoning Jasper.

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><p>Carlisle stood outside Edward's room, his arm wrapped around his wife as she stared through the window. It was late and he was exhausted. He'd stayed much later than his shift had required and when he'd finally made it home his wife had demanded to visit the hospital. Not wanting to let her go by herself he'd driven there and now they were looking in on his patient just hours before his next shift was due to begin.<p>

"I can't believe she'd do this." His wife muttered sadly.

"You know it probably wasn't her idea." He countered but he knew it made little difference.

"She still went along with it." There was nothing he could say to that. He agreed whole heartedly with his wife. They hadn't been able to find the whole story yet but he didn't think there was anything that could excuse what had apparently been done.

"Are you sure we have to wait?" She asked, finally turning away from the window to look at him. It was hard to deny her anything, especially when she looked so sad but he had to do what was right for his patient and he'd already pushed the limits too far by insisting his brother and sister be contacted. He didn't want to add any more stress. He'd looked in on them earlier, just before he'd headed home and Edward had been studiously ignoring his brother. In turn, Emmett had looked just as miserable but he was proving to be persistent as he stayed with him. They needed more time before they threw anything else at Edward.

"Yes, wait until he's home. He's got enough to deal with right now." He answered his wife who sighed and turned back to the window.

"I just want to help him."

"I know and we will. Just give it a little time." He kissed her temple before pulling her away from the window and taking her home. There was nothing she could do right now except upsetting herself further and he needed some sleep before he went back to work. He had a feeling it was going to be another long day.

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><p>Edward woke to find Emmett still occupying the chair next to his bed and snoring once more. Breathing felt a little easier that morning although he could tell the pain from his ribs and shoulder were only being dulled by medication. His throat felt dry and scratchy and wanting to avoid an unnecessary coughing fit he looked for the glass and water that Bella had always offered him. It was sitting on the table by his bed, a fluffy teddy bear that he recognised as Lucy's sitting next to it. He hadn't noticed the bear when he'd woken up in the night but he assumed Alice must have returned to the hospital with some of his things which by the looks of it Lucy had helped pick out. Not wanting to wake Emmett and be forced to talk to him, Edward tried to reach out with his right arm to get to the glass. Unfortunately it wasn't worth the shot of pain it sent through his chest as it sat just out of his reach.<p>

Frustrated at his inability to do something as simple as get himself a drink he persevered on, determined to ignore the pain that broke through his medicated haze as he shuffled himself further over to the right hand side of his bed. His left arm was still useless to him as it sat safely in its sling and his right shook as he reached out once more for the glass. He could just about reach it but worried he'd end up knocking it over so he picked up Lucy's bear first to avoid getting it wet if he did. Once the bear was safely on his lap he reached over again, having to lean his whole body across, but as his fingers wrapped around the glass he lost his balance. Unable to use his left arm to stop it, not only did the sudden drop of his right arm onto the edge of the table send shockwaves of pain through his chest but as his body tipped to the side breathing suddenly got a lot more difficult. His lack of breath panicked him only making it worse and his right arm refused to co-operate to right himself as the pain he'd caused broke through the dregs of his pain medication making it as useless as his left. Somehow Emmett managed to sleep on through it all until Edward started to feel light headed and an alarm on one of the machines he was attached to started sounding. The loud bleeping jolted Emmett awake and he leapt from his seat immediately trying to right Edward. Unfortunately the damage had already been done and although the upright position helped his breathing a little the pain that had been reawakened still made it impossible for him to take a deep breath. The light headedness increased and Edward was almost certain he was going to pass out when the coughing began only making it worse.

Emmett stood uselessly to the side, watching as what little colour Edward had recovered in the night drained away. He could see the glassy look his eyes took on and glanced to the door hoping a nurse or doctor would appear soon. When the coughing started he winced at how painful it must be as it racked Edward's body, curling him in on himself. There was nothing he could do except hand him one of the disposable bowls that had been left for such occasions to spit into when there was a slight break in the coughing. It was with great relief that he stepped back as a nurse finally rushed into the room and immediately got to work. He saw her alter his pain medication before urging Edward to take deep steady breaths. As he did that, wincing with each one, the nurse crossed over to the machines and turned off the alarm. She pressed a few more buttons and Emmett could see it did something to help as Edward slumped back onto his pillows and closed his eyes.

"What happened?" The nurse turned to Emmett for an explanation as Edward seemed too out of it to offer any kind of explanation himself.

"I don't know. I was sleeping." Emmett responded causing the nurse to frown as she looked back at Edward. She lifted the small bowl away from where it lay beside him and peered into it, her frown intensifying. Curious as to what was going on Emmett sat up straight so he could see what she was staring at only to wish he hadn't when he saw the blood tinted mucous.

"I'll let Dr. Cullen know as soon as he comes in. Try and make sure he stays calm in the mean time." She said before taking one last look at the readouts on the machines and then leaving. It was only once she was gone that Emmett noticed the teddy bear that had been sitting on Edward's bedside table was now in his bed. He looked to where it should have been and spotted the water glass lying on its side and realised what had happened. He sighed, knowing he was going to have to do better at keeping an eye on Edward as it appeared he'd rather hurt himself than ask for help. It was ridiculous but he couldn't blame Edward for sticking to a habit that was partly his fault in the first place. Emmett settled in for a long vigilance as there was no way he'd be leaving Edward on his own any time soon even if he did appear to have succumbed to sleep again.

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><p>Bella and Lucy arrived to find a very sullen Edward and a frustrated Emmett. Edward brightened considerably the moment he saw them so Lucy was quick to run over and climb onto his bed. She grabbed his hand and kissed it while Bella followed her over, choosing the chair beside Emmett to sit down in.<p>

"How you feeling today?" She asked, looking at him carefully and taking note of his still deathly pale skin and the dark circles under his eyes. Considering how much he'd been sleeping she'd expected him to look a little more rested.

"I'm ok. How about you guys, did you have fun last night Lucy?" He answered and Bella could hear Emmett grumbling to himself while Lucy shrugged in response to Edward's question and linked her fingers through his. Looking between the two brother's Bella wondered what had gone on between them that morning. Emmett certainly didn't seem to agree with Edward's assessment of being ok. Questioning them would have to wait though as Edward was looking at Lucy concerned by her shrugged response.

"Lucy missed you but other than that I think we had fun." Bella answered Edward to reassure him everything was fine. Lucy seemed to be oblivious to that though as she revelled in just being near to her daddy. Although she had had fun at Bella's house she'd missed her daddy so much. The first night away from home had been exciting and although she'd missed him it hadn't been too bad. The second night however she'd known he was in hospital and she hadn't been able to forget that. She hadn't like knowing that he wasn't just in the next room and she'd missed him putting her to bed. She'd also been worried what would happen with her Uncle there, her daddy was already hurt, she didn't want him upset as well and she didn't trust Emmett. It was a relief to be back beside him where she could see that he was ok.

"I missed you too baby." Edward said untangling their hands so her could reach up to stroke her cheek. She tilted her head into his hand but managed to smile up at him. Seeing the concern still in his eyes she realised her shrug must have worried him so started to tell him all about her night to ease him. Since Edward was happily caught up in Lucy's chatter Bella let them have their moment and turned to the still scowling Emmett.

"What's going on?" She asked quietly, snapping his attention to her. He was radiating tension as he stared at the two on the bed and she wanted to know what had happened.

"He's not ok. He had some kind of weird panic attack thing this morning. I think he tried to get his water without waking me and it was too far away. He ended up slumped over on his side, didn't seem to be able to breathe. The nurse came in, fiddled with some stuff then left and he fell asleep again. Then when he woke up he refused to eat the breakfast they brought him." He grumbled, pointing to the tray that was sitting where the water had been before. Peering at the odd looking gloopy substance that was sitting in the bowl Bella didn't think she'd want to eat that either.

"Can you blame him? Would you want to eat whatever that is?" She asked Emmett who glanced at it before shaking his head.

"No but that's not the point. He's refusing to let me help him yet he won't even help himself. If he'd just woken me up this morning he wouldn't have had trouble with his breathing or the pain."

"The only time I've ever seen him accept help willingly is when I offered to take Lucy while he's in here. He doesn't even want you here so it's not surprising he's not asking for your help." What Emmett had described was what she'd been expecting, what surprised her was Emmett's reaction. He wasn't just giving up and leaving even though he obviously had no idea what to do and it chipped away at her dislike for him a little.

"This is so messed up. I know he doesn't trust me but surely anyone's help is better than nothing if he wants to get out of here. I don't know what to do to get through to him."

Bella studied him for a moment before she answered. She knew why Edward felt the way he did about Emmett and Alice but Emmett did have a point. They were there and willing to help. If accepting that got him out of hospital and recovered faster then surely that had to be a good thing. He didn't have to like them being there, just accept it. The frustration and sadness that was written all over Emmett's face plus the fact he was still sitting there suggested he was serious about being there. Alice certainly had no intentions of vanishing if the inventory she was doing of Edward's flat was anything to go by and she said her parent's didn't watch what she was doing at least. Maybe they did deserve the chance to prove they wanted to be in his life and make up for what had happened. In her urge to hear the story from Edward she hadn't heard anything from their point of view so her initial prejudice against them could have been unfair.

"Let me talk to him. Go down to the canteen or something." It was a long shot but maybe she could get him to see that accepting their help may be for the best. She still didn't entirely trust them, and she knew there would be plenty of fights along the way but if Edward wanted to get better he did need them.

"I could do with some coffee I guess and thank you. I know we can't have made a very good impression but I've only ever wanted to help him." Emmett said before he stood up and left. Bella watched him go before turning her attention back to the bed where it appeared Emmett's departure had not gone unnoticed by Edward.

"Where's he going?"

"The canteen for coffee."

"Good. I don't want him here." Edward responded making Bella shake her head and smile slightly. He was getting to be predictable and she kind of liked the fact she was obviously getting to know him.

"I know but he's coming back." She watched him scowl at that piece of information and found it amusing that he was acting more like a sullen child than she'd ever seen Lucy act. "You know he only wants to help you right?"

"I don't need his help."

"Sounds like it. What happened this morning?" She asked and she knew she'd got him when his scowl just intensified and he refused to answer.

"I know you have good reason for not wanting him here but you do need help and who else is there?" She asked making him sigh.

"I'll be fine. I've always found a way before." He didn't want to fall out with Bella, he liked her being there but he really wished she'd drop it. She'd been so kind to take care of Lucy for him and he didn't want to repay that by snapping at her but he just couldn't deal with this right now. He wanted to sit and chat with her and Lucy and attempt to pretend that everything was fine.

"This is different. You physically can't look after yourself or Lucy, there's no way around that." She responded and he looked down at Lucy who was watching him carefully. Squeezing her hand he smiled slightly before looking back to Bella, his smile vanishing as he did and Bella could see the pain back in his eyes. He knew she was right. His failed attempt at reaching for a glass had proved how useless he was but he really wished there was another option.

"You don't have to like them but let Emmett and Alice help you. You'll get better a lot faster." She added softly when he didn't say anything. He just shook his head and leaned back into his pillows, letting his eyes fall shut trying to block Lucy from seeing the pain he knew would be there as Bella made him think about things he'd rather avoid.

"And what happens if I do then when I get dependant on them being there my Dad finds out and they have to leave? What am I meant to do then? It's better if I just find a way to manage by myself." He responded quietly, trying not to let his emotions leek out in the tone of his voice. The last thing he wanted to do right now was upset Lucy and he knew how easily she picked up on what he was feeling. One of them feeling miserable and lost was enough.

"That might not happen or you might be better by then and you won't need them around anymore. Just think about it, I don't think they're going to be going anywhere any time soon so you're stuck with them whether you want them here or not. You may as well let them help while they're here." She pushed hating how much the idea of it obviously upset him but it had to be done. He couldn't keep making things worse for himself by refusing help. Lucy needed him healthy and Bella hated seeing him like this.

"Fine, I'll think about it. Can we change the subject now?" He grumbled snapping his eyes open again so Lucy was quick to jump in, trying to arrange a trip to visit the ducks at the park once Edward was better. Bella let it go but she hoped he'd taken in what she'd said and wouldn't just ignore it.

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><p>The first thing Carlisle did when he arrived at work was check on Edward. He found him awake and looking happy as he talked with Bella and Lucy. He was still pale and the untouched breakfast tray didn't go unnoticed but he looked to be ok. There was nothing too concerning on his chart although he did see that his pain medication and oxygen had been increased that morning. Having not even got round to taking off his coat yet he left Edward's room to go and get sorted for the day but promised he'd be back later on.<p>

Bella and Lucy stayed for the rest of the day and Edward managed to stay awake for most of their visit, taking a nap when Bella took Lucy down to the canteen for an hour to get some lunch. Emmett had returned to the room half an hour after he'd gone clutching a paper cup of coffee for himself and a yoghurt that he offered to Edward. Edward didn't say anything but he did take the yoghurt which made both Emmett and Bella smile as it was progress. Emmett stayed in the room for the whole day even though Edward didn't speak to him once. Alice visited briefly in the afternoon but she could only stay for an hour as she had an essay to write for school. She'd talked a mile a minute while she'd been there, telling Edward of her plans to make sure the flat was ready for his return. He'd scowled and remained silent throughout her speech and Bella had wanted to shut her up some way about half way through as she could tell it was overwhelming him but he surprised everyone when at the end Alice had asked if she could borrow his keys and he'd nodded his ascent. Jasper had turned up then to say hello and pick Alice up and she'd left with a cheery goodbye, promising to be back later.

Carlisle appeared regularly throughout the afternoon though he didn't really seem to have any medical reason as to why he was there half the time. By the time Bella was getting Lucy ready to leave Edward was ready to sleep. For someone who was used to spending all his time with just his daughter, the influx of people and constant company had turned out to be somewhat exhausting and almost as soon as they were out the door he was fast asleep.

When Edward woke up that night he was pleasantly surprised to find Emmett was no longer there. It didn't take long for him to realise that he wasn't on his own though and when he looked to his other side Alice was sitting there, wide awake and flicking through a magazine.

"What are you doing here Alice?" He asked, his voice thick with sleep. His head felt kind of hazy making him wonder why he'd woken up in the first place.

"I sent Emmett back to your flat to get some proper sleep." She answered while closing her magazine and sitting it on the floor so she could concentrate on her brother.

"Won't Mum and Dad be wondering where you are?" It had to be pretty late if she'd sent Emmett home so she shouldn't have been there. It was much harder to feel the same hostility towards her as he did for Emmett and Bella's words earlier had got to him. He wouldn't push them away but he still wanted to keep his distance. It would be so much harder to do that when it was Alice and not Emmett sitting there as it was much easier to ignore Emmett.

"Mum knows where I am and I doubt Dad even knows I'm not at home. He's got some huge case going on at work so he's hardly ever around right now. If he comes home Mum will tell him I'm at Jasper's." She answered with a shrug and Edward didn't know what to say to that. It appeared she had this well thought out which shouldn't have surprised him but it left him with no excuses as to why she should leave.

"Mum knows?" He asked hesitantly after a minute. It had taken a moment for that part of Alice's answer to filter through his thoughts but when it did he felt a pain in his chest he didn't think was due to his ribs or pneumonia. Alice nodded slowly.

"She won't tell Dad." She said but that wasn't what had upset him.

"She won't be visiting though either will she?" He asked quietly and when Alice shook her head sadly he closed his eyes having had enough of talking all of a sudden. His hope that maybe she really had been there the night before was dashed and the familiar ache at her not being there for him returned. He'd known she wouldn't be but it hurt for it to be confirmed. She knew he was in hospital, but she still didn't care. He wondered if it would ever stop hurting.

Alice watched Edward as he fell back to sleep wishing that she'd thought about her answer to his questions more carefully. She hadn't meant to upset him, she'd just wanted him to know he didn't have to worry about them being there. Their parent's had believed Emmett's lie about going on a last minute holiday his friend's had arranged which was why he'd had to go to Edward's flat to sleep on his sofa as he couldn't go home. Alice hadn't worried about telling their mother where she was headed as she'd known she wouldn't tell their dad. She'd never stood up for Edward when everything had gotten so screwed up but Alice had always been able to tell that she hadn't agreed with their dad either. She'd wanted her to know that Edward was in hospital in the hope it would garner some kind of response but all that had happened was a brief pained look that had soon been smoothed over by an apathetic mask as she'd just said to have fun at Jasper's. Alice had taken it for what it was; permission to go and a promise that her Dad would not be told her real whereabouts. It had angered her initially but she'd long grown used to her parent's attitudes towards Edward, their usual response being totally ignoring the fact he even existed. At least she'd tried, there was nothing else she could do there so she had left without another word and headed for the hospital. Emmett had filled her in on Edward's apparent plan to ignore them so she hadn't expected him to say anything to her. She was glad that he had though and hoped it was a sign of him letting them in again but she was sorry she'd ended up upsetting him.

The rest of Edward's stay in hospital was much the same. Lucy continued to stay with Bella who brought her in to visit each day after school. They'd stay until dinner time with Lucy filling him in on everything he was missing and then Bella would take her home. Either Emmett or Alice was with him at all times. They never left him on his own. He still wouldn't really talk to them but he seemed to have accepted their presence as he didn't glare at them so often. They didn't try to force him to talk but made sure he knew they were there for him if he needed. No one had managed to get out of him what had happened to leave him passed out in Garrett's doorway but they all kept hoping he'd let something slip eventually. Whenever anyone asked he maintained that he couldn't remember but both Bella and Garrett, who continued to visit occasionally, had seen the way he shifted uncomfortably and refused to meet anyone's eyes when asked and knew he was lying. They'd tried to call him out on it but he'd just say he was tired forcing them to drop it. Since he refused to give them any information they'd shared what they knew with Emmett and Alice so they could keep an eye out for Vicky too. Neither of them had recognized her description or knew of anything in Edward's past that would warrant the trouble he'd been getting so they were still no closer to working out what was going on.

By the end of the week Edward no longer needed the oxygen treatments, the antibiotics seemed to making some progress, his arm was out of the sling and they'd managed to lower his pain medications. His shoulder ached with any movement of his arm and the pain from his broken ribs was still there along with his cough but with the promise of Emmett being there to look after him and Edward's instance that he wanted to go home Carlisle finally gave in and discharged him on the Saturday afternoon, exactly a week after he'd been admitted.

Carlisle wasn't totally comfortable with it but Edward had been making good progress and he was feeling well enough now that the restlessness he felt towards being in the hospital would probably do more harm than letting him go. Even so, he still took Emmett aside and made sure he knew what to look out for and ensured he had his personal contact numbers for if anything, no matter how small, happened. Edward was still incredibly weak and would be limited to bed rest if for no other reason than taking just a few steps was enough to exhaust him but no one was under the illusion that would stop him from trying. Carlisle would not be surprised if Edward pushed himself too hard and ended up right back where he was.

Edward was so pleased to be getting to go home that he didn't even wince at the pain it caused to pull his favourite t-shirt over his head. He couldn't wait to be back in his own bed with Lucy cuddled up to him. The stupid no hugging rule would be gone the moment they left the hospital and there was nothing he wanted more than to feel his little girl snuggled into his chest. It had been torture the entire week only getting to see her for a couple of hours a day and he could tell she'd felt the same. She'd enjoyed her time with Bella but she was ready to be home as well. He knew Emmett and Alice would be there but for the moment he was happy to ignore that fact so he could enjoy being home. He'd got used to them being around but he still wouldn't talk to them for fear of letting them get too close. He couldn't wait to be back home and for things get back to normal so it was just him and Lucy.

Bella had taken Lucy to the park to let Emmett get Edward settled at home before he had Lucy to deal with too as they all knew she'd be over excited at the prospect of having her dad home again so it was just Emmett at the hospital when Edward was ready to leave. The excitement of getting to go home didn't last long for Edward. Just the few steps from the wheelchair Emmett had pushed him out of the hospital in to Emmett's car left him exhausted and in pain leaving him with the realisation that things wouldn't be going back to normal for a while yet. As his excitement died his focus moved to the pain it had been masking and it was clear to see. Emmett watched him move awkwardly and almost fall into the passenger seat and wondered if Edward been discharged too early but knowing how much he wanted to be home he didn't say anything and instead just got into the car and started it up.

From his vantage point at the doors to the hospital Carlisle was thinking much the same as he watched the brothers leave. He'd be making a home visit soon that was for sure. His wife wouldn't want to wait much longer and he was concerned how Edward would fare once home. He seemed to have been getting on better with his brother and sister as the week had gone on but he wasn't sure that would last once he was back home and there was no way he'd manage on his own. They were definitely going to have to keep a very close eye on him. He'd give them a day or so to get settled but then he'd be giving into his wife. The sooner they could make that home visit the better. Until then he'd just have to hope Emmett knew what he was doing and would keep Edward from doing any more damage to himself.


	23. Chapter 21 Home

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

Happy National Story Telling Day! 

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><p><strong>Chapter 21 – Home<strong>

The journey to the flat block was silent as Emmett was pretty sure Edward had fallen asleep and if he had, he didn't want to wake him. It wasn't until he turned the car into the car park that Emmett suddenly realised they had a problem. The lift in Edward's flat block was still out of order which meant the only way to get to his flat would be the stairs. Considering Edward barely had the energy to walk a couple of steps on a flat surface, there was no way he was going to manage three flights of stairs. There was nothing he could do about it though as there was no other way to get to the flat and nowhere else he could take him. With how little Edward weighed right now he guessed he could probably carry him but he doubted Edward would let him so this was not going to be fun.

Pulling the car to a stop he looked across at Edward whose eyes were still closed so he got out of his seat and walked round to Edward's side where he opened the door and gently shook Edward's knee to wake him. His eyes blearily opened and he looked around them, disorientated and confused.

"Home." Emmett informed him before moving round to the back of the car to retrieve Edward's bag. Once he'd got it out and locked the boot up he went back to Edward who hadn't moved from his seat. Emmett put the bag down on the floor before going closer to Edward to see what the holdup was and noticed the unfocused look his eyes had about them.

"You ok?" He asked, crouching down so they were on the same level. Edward really wasn't looking well. His complexion had paled again and there was a thin sheen of sweat gathering on his skin.

"Dizzy." Edward mumbled in response. He hadn't felt this bad since the first time he'd tried getting out of his hospital bed but he didn't want to admit to Emmett just how bad he felt in case he decided to take him straight back to hospital. He was going to have to accept his help to get inside though as he doubted he'd be able to stand on his own. He just wanted to be in his bed.

Emmett sighed thinking once again that Edward shouldn't have left the hospital yet but he knew it was no good mentioning it. Dr. Cullen had warned them that the effects of Edward's concussion may linger due to everything else that was going on with him and although they hadn't seemed too apparent while he was in his hospital bed Emmett guessed they'd be showing up more now he was trying to move around. There was nothing that could be done to ease them. They were just going to have to wait for time to do its job and in the mean time try to deal with their effects.

"Let's get you out the car and up to your bed." He said, straightening up before helping Edward to get out of the car. Once stood up, Edward felt the dizziness getting worse and he had to lean into Emmett's support to stay upright. They stood still as Emmett locked his car up before he lifted Edward's bag again then put his free arm around Edward's waist to support him as Edward leant against him. Emmett knew it was a sign of how bad Edward was feeling that he wasn't arguing about him helping him which in itself was worrying.

They slowly made their way towards the main doors of the building and through them. Emmett glanced towards the lift but there hadn't been a miracle in the time he'd been at the hospital and it was still broken. Edward paid it no attention as he was finding it hard to focus on anything enough to be able to see where he was going properly and wouldn't have been able to stay standing if it wasn't for Emmett holding onto him. It took them near on twenty minutes to struggle up the stairs and when they finally reached the floor with Edward's flat on Edward wanted nothing more than to collapse there and then. He was out of breath, his chest and head had begun to really hurt and the dizziness was making him feel sick. Emmett managed to get him to his flat door though and unlocked it, putting Edward's bag down just inside it before once again placing his arm around Edward to help support him and get him inside. Emmett half carried him towards his bedroom and once inside the room, he helped Edward to lower himself onto the bed where after Emmett had pulled back the quilt, he slipped under it and closed his eyes, instantly falling asleep.

Emmett pulled the cover back over Edward and watched him for a minute before being satisfied that he wasn't having any serious problems with his breathing. It evened out after a few minutes so he left him and went through to the kitchen to put the kettle on. After he'd done that he went and collected Edward's bag and took it into his room, putting it down by the bed and glancing to Edward again. He really was convinced Edward should have stayed in hospital longer and thought about ringing Dr. Cullen but Edward had accepted his help and he knew if he sent him back to the hospital he'd go right back to pushing him away. Hopefully he'd feel a little better after some sleep in his own bed, if not he really would have to ring the doctor as he didn't want to risk Edward's health getting worse.

Not wanting to wake Edward, Emmett quietly left his room again and wandered through to the kitchen to try and work out what he could cook everyone for dinner. Alice had fully stocked the kitchen making Emmett hope he could keep Edward away from looking through the cupboards and fridge for a while as he was fairly sure he wouldn't take kindly to them throwing money around. For the time being though it was useful as he was hopeless at grocery shopping and not very good at cooking either so he was thankful Alice had stocked the freezer with plenty of emergency ready meals. He knew he was going to have to do better than those though as Edward needed to gain weight and it couldn't just be empty calories. It had been explained to all of them during the week that he had to eat a healthy diet as it wasn't specifically the lack of weight that was the problem; it was the missing nutrients and vitamins that had crashed his immune system. They'd been given plenty of diet sheets and meal suggestions and he was hoping they'd be easy to follow. Bella had even volunteered to help him since she could already cook.

Emmett was just shuffling through some of the recipes to try and find something easy to start off with when he heard someone knock on the door. He hurried to answer it knowing it would be Bella with Lucy home from their day out. Bella had taken her to the park to feed the ducks in an attempt to keep her occupied and distracted from Edward for a while. When he opened the door he found he was right as Lucy ran in and past him without saying hello as she headed straight towards Edward's room.

"Lucy he's asleep." Emmett called after her but she carried on, desperate to see her daddy and make sure he was ok. She'd liked seeing the ducks but even they hadn't been able to distract her and all she'd been able to think about all day was that her dad would be at home.

She carefully opened Edward's door, hearing Emmett's warning and not wanting to wake him. Entering the room she went up to the side of Edward's bed and stood just looking at him for a minute before she climbed up beside him. He looked the same as he had when she'd last seen him although the bandage had finally been taken off his head and now he was sleeping on his side she could see the section of hair that had had to be shaved away, making the small line of stitches on the back of his head obvious. She carefully moved up next to him before she lifted the edge of the cover and shuffled under it, all the time trying not to wake him. Satisfied that she was close enough she gently kissed his cheek before she cuddled up to him slightly and settled down. She'd missed being able to fall asleep like that.

Bella and Emmett had followed her in and watched as she settled down next to Edward. It was nice to see them reunited like that as it had been painfully obvious to everyone how much the pair had missed their closeness in the last week. Happy that they were both ok for the time being they left the room to let them sleep in peace and Bella followed Emmett as he went back into the kitchen where he set about finishing the cups of tea he'd started.

"How is Edward?" Bella asked, as she sat at the table with her cup of tea, watching Emmett peer confusedly at the recipe cards.

"Not well enough to be home." He answered, looking up from the cards to her so she gestured for him to pass them to her. Thankful for the help he happily handed them over before sitting down at the table with her.

"How'd you mean?" She asked whilst looking through them and settling on lasagne. She'd also seen how well stocked Alice had left the kitchen so she knew they'd have all the ingredients they'd need to make it. Edward had continued to be reluctant to eat whilst in hospital saying he didn't feel hungry when meals were brought in and when he did eat it was only small portions. When she'd made lasagne at her house he'd eaten it happily and the meat was rich in iron so she figured it would be a good meal to start off with. Emmett had mentioned he wasn't a very confident cook and she considered it pretty straight forward too so all in all it was a pretty good choice.

"He can't move without pain and by the time we got to the car he was dizzy. I had to virtually carry him up here." He told her and she looked up from the recipe to see the worry on Emmett's face.

"Dr. Cullen wouldn't have let him go if he thought he wouldn't be able to cope and we can always call him out if he doesn't improve. Now that he's home, where he wants to be, it might help." She said, trying to see the best in the situation as she knew how much Edward had wanted to be home. It was all he'd talked about for his last couple of days stuck there and she'd seen how much Lucy wanted him back. She'd been asking when he'd be home constantly and getting more and more restless as the week went on.

"Yeah, and I suppose he'll be a lot happier being back with Lucy. Found any that look good?" He asked, nodding towards the cards.

"Yup, lasagne, I know he likes it and yeah, she knows better than anyone how to handle him as well." Bella added and Emmett smiled slightly at that. Lucy certainly did know how to handle Edward, no matter what mood he was in. During the past week she'd always seemed to know exactly what to say to either cheer him up or calm him down depending on what was upsetting or annoying him. They'd all been trying to learn from her as Edward's mood had been rather volatile due to his frustration at being stuck in hospital but so far none of them could read his moods as well as her. Bella doubted they would ever be able to as Lucy had years of experience over them.

"She does that." Emmett agreed as he glanced over the recipe Bella had given him. Seeing his eyes go wide as he read through it she couldn't help but laugh a little.

"It's really not that hard. Come on, I'll show you." She said, standing and draining her mug of tea so they could get started.

"How was Lucy today by the way?" Emmett asked as he helped Bella find all the ingredients they needed.

"She wanted Edward, hardly even bothered with the ducks." Bella answered. They'd still managed to have a nice time but Bella had let Lucy cut the day short as she'd been eager to check that Edward had got home ok as well. "Is Alice coming over later too?"

"Urm no, I think she's waiting until tomorrow. We didn't want to overdo it and I'm thinking that was the right thing to do considering how much just getting here took out of him. Alice on top of that would be too much."

"Yeah I think you're right with that. She is a little overwhelming sometimes." Bella responded. She was still wary of how Edward was going to react when he realised what Alice had done. It wasn't just the kitchen she'd fully restocked. She'd also cleaned the entire flat and filled out Edward's wardrobe a little. His old leather jacket he'd been wearing the night he was attacked had ended up destroyed with the blood that had soaked through it and then when the doctors had taken it off him. Alice had taken that as an excuse to replace it with a brand new one and while shopping had decided to add to his t-shirt and jeans collection as well. Bella was convinced it would be too much but when she'd found out what Alice had been planning to do her objections had fallen on deaf ears.

"She means well." Emmett commented and didn't have anything else to say on the matter so they got on with preparing dinner. He discovered cooking really wasn't as hard as he'd thought as Bella lead him through what needed doing. While it was in the oven cooking they did the washing up, making sure everything was dried and put away, not wanting to leave anything that Edward could decide needed doing when he woke up.

Edward woke to find Lucy cuddled into his chest and automatically moved to hug her, ignoring the pain it caused. As Edward's arms tightened around her Lucy stirred and realising he was awake she lifted her head up slightly to be able to look at him. Noticing she was awake as well, he smiled slightly to her and she returned it before moving again to kiss his cheek. Edward returned the gesture by kissing the top of her head before holding her closer to him and burying his face into her hair. He breathed in, taking in the familiar scent of her hair, feeling relieved to be back at home and with her. Even though Bella had brought her in to see him at the hospital it hadn't been the same as having her there constantly and he had missed her, especially at night, knowing she couldn't crawl into bed beside him and wasn't just in the next room.

"Missed you Luce." He mumbled, his voice quiet and groggy with sleep.

"Missed you too Daddy." She responded, causing Edward to smile slightly with just the sound of her voice and the word Daddy. He really did hate being away from her for any longer than he had to be. Edward loosened his grip on Lucy again as he woke up a bit more and found the urge to look around his room, just to make sure everything was right and how it should be. It was tidier than he remembered leaving it but other than the lack of clothes on the floor it looked the same which he was relieved about. If cleaning was the only thing Alice had done to the place he'd be very surprised so he wondered what she'd done that wasn't apparent at first sight but he'd worry about that later so he could get back to enjoying hugging Lucy. The pain and dizziness that getting there had caused was all worth it as he was glad to be home and right now he was happy they were on their own. It was the way things should be, just him and Lucy.

That didn't last for very long though as just after Edward had thought it the door to his room opened up and Bella and Emmett walked in, both carrying plates of lasagne.

"You hungry?" Emmett asked hopefully. Edward couldn't really say he was, he hadn't been since waking up in hospital but seeing that Emmett was expecting him to eat and someone had gone to the trouble of cooking he just nodded and carefully pushed himself up to be sat. Once he was settled Emmett passed him the plate he was holding and a knife and fork. Edward took them and balanced the plate on his knee while he put the knife down and got a better grip on the fork. He then stuck the fork into the lasagne and picked a small bit of it up.

Bella handed Lucy one of the plates she was carrying once Lucy had scrambled out from under the covers to be sat cross legged on top of them so she could balance her plate on her legs, being careful not to get any of the food onto Edward's bed while Bella sat on the end of it. Emmett didn't join them, instead deciding to go back out to the living room to eat as he wanted to keep Edward in a good mood and he knew after the last week he'd probably rather just have Bella and Lucy there.

"So are you glad to be back home?" Bella asked as they all started to eat although Edward wasn't so much eating as pushing his food around the plate.

"Definitely." He responded with a smile and he was happy that Bella starting up a conversation meant she wouldn't be focussing on how much he was eating. He knew he needed to improve his eating habits but he was sick of everyone being so paranoid over it. He knew once he started to feel a little better that his appetite would return but right now he had no urge to eat what so ever and having everyone pushing him to eat more just made him want to even less. He'd been looking after himself for so long now that he hated being told what to do.

"Good, you certainly look happier already." Bella commented. It was nice to see him smiling and Lucy looked a lot happier as well although as she glanced to her she could see Lucy was watching Edward with narrowed eyes.

"Daddy, don't play with it, eat it." She suddenly demanded. She'd been watching him after noticing he didn't seem to actually be lifting his fork to his mouth and was certain all he'd been doing was pushing the food around and pressing part of it into a flat lump. Edward look to her in surprise as he'd assumed she was focusing on her own dinner but as her words registered he couldn't help but grin at her, realising that he had once again been told off by his five year old daughter for doing something he realised was something he'd more usually be telling her off for.

"Sorry Luce." He apologised, his grin still in place as he actually lifted a fork full to his mouth and ate it. Bella shook her head at the pair of them as she realised what Edward had been doing. It was a good job Lucy paid attention as Bella hadn't noticed he hadn't been eating, too preoccupied with his eyes as they spoke. They were such a pretty colour and his smile had brought the sparkle back to them. He was far too distracting for his own good.

Lucy watched him take a few more mouthfuls before returning to eating her own dinner and once he was sure Lucy had stopped watching him Edward returned to just playing with his food before deciding he really had, had enough of it and he set the plate down to his side. It was nice but he just really wasn't hungry.

"Did Emmett cook?" He asked as he looked at his uneaten lasagne. He could still remember the last time he'd tasted Emmett's cooking and he hadn't been able to identify what it had even been. Either he'd been practising in the years they'd been separated or Bella had helped.

"Yup, I just supervised." She answered with a smile but when she noticed he'd stopped eating altogether her smile faded a little although she masked her disappointment, knowing how much everyone had been getting on his nerves trying to force food down him. At least he'd eaten some of it.

"Guess that explains why it's edible then." He responded and for the first time in over a week she saw his crooked smile reappear as it seemed Emmett cooking amused him. Being home was obviously doing some good for his spirit even if his appetite was still missing. She hoped he'd recover quickly now he was home so she could try and do something about her reactions to him. It had become obvious to her over the week that just being friends with him was not going to be enough as she already cared about him far too much but she knew she would have to tread carefully if she wanted things to progress and there was no way anything would ever happen while he was ill. His natural wariness of getting close to people was going to make things hard and it wouldn't be fair to try and get past that when he was already vulnerable. It would not lead to a healthy foundation for building a relationship so it was going to have to take time but she was certain he would be worth the wait.

"He did really well actually. I think you'll be safe with his cooking and if he does mess up Alice left some ready meals in the freezer." She replied trying to ignore her thoughts but his smile faded a little at the mention of Alice before it returned as Lucy put her cleared plate on his bedside table and cuddled back into his side.

"How were the ducks?" He asked her effectively distracted from the mention of Alice and remembering Bella had mentioned the previous night that she was planning to take Lucy to the park.

"They miss you." Lucy responded.

"Do they now? I guess we'll have to go visit them soon then." Lucy just smiled and snuggled into him more so he wrapped his arm around her and kissed the top of her head before glancing back to Bella who was now also finished eating. Seeing she had his attention she stood and collected all the plates up deciding it was time to leave so they could have some time alone as they looked so content cuddled up together and she didn't want to intrude.

"I'm going to head off now. Lucy has reading homework to do by the way, she said she had to wait for you to help her. If you need anything ring me and I'll come visit in a couple of days if you want?"

"I'd like that, and thank you again for looking after Lucy this week." Edward said earnestly. The last week would have been so much harder if it hadn't been for Bella. He still couldn't really believe that she'd gone to so much trouble to help him and Lucy out but he was too grateful to question it.

"It was no trouble. We're going to miss her now so you'll both have to come visit soon." She replied with a smile, happy that he wanted her to visit as it gave her hope that he felt a little of what she did. "Lucy you take good care of your daddy ok?"

"I will." She promised easily making Edward kiss her head again and Bella took the moment to slip out of the room and leave them to it. There was no point lingering as there would be plenty more opportunities for her to spend time with him and that night was definitely a much needed father daughter one. She dumped the empty plates in the kitchen and said a brief goodbye to Emmett before leaving, content with the knowledge that Edward was home and ok.

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><p>Lucy was perfectly content cuddling up to Edward. The last few nights she'd missed having Edward to herself a great deal as in the hospital Bella and Emmett were always there too. As much as she liked having Bella around she still wanted her time with Edward and now he was home she was hoping she could have that back even if he was asleep for a major part of it. For now though he was awake and she revelled in the comfort that brought.<p>

"Did you have fun staying with Bella?" Edward asked after they'd been sat in silence for a while just enjoying each others' company. He was curious to know if she'd still like Bella as much after spending so much time around her or if the novelty would have worn off. He felt her nodding as her head was leant against his chest.

"She's really really nice. Anna gets annoyed with her sometimes but I didn't. Her mummy's nice too, they played with us lots. Bella gives good hugs." She mumbled into his chest making it hard from him to catch but he managed to get the gist of what she'd said.

"Well hugs are important so that's good." He commented with a smile. It seemed her like for Bella wasn't just a passing obsession and he wasn't really surprised considering he liked her as well. Lucy was right about the hugs too. It had only been brief but even after everything that had happened since he could still remember how nice her hug had felt. That along with how good she'd been with Lucy all week made him wish even more than he did before that things were different, but they weren't so he tried not to dwell on it and returned his thoughts to Lucy. A lot had changed in the last week and he'd always been too groggy on medication or sleep in the hospital to be able to focus enough on making sure she was ok with everything, he'd just had to trust that everyone else was looking after her. Now he had the chance he wanted to check that she really was ok. He was pleased to hear he'd been right in trusting Bella but there were other people involved as well now.

"What about Uncle Emmett and Auntie Alice, do you like them?" He asked not sure what he wanted her answer to be. He half hoped she didn't so he could stick to ignoring them and she wouldn't be hurt when they left but then again he didn't want her to be uncomfortable with them around when Emmett was insisting on staying with them. He felt her nod again and didn't know how to feel about it or what to say. He really didn't want her growing attached to them for them to just walk away at some point.

"But I like you better." She commented oblivious to what he was actually thinking but it still made his smile return slightly as it did answer an unvoiced worry that had been festering from the moment he'd been unable to take care of her. She was his entire world and he didn't know what he'd do if he ever had to live without her. He hugged her a little tighter to himself, ignoring the flare of pain from his ribs as they protested the movement and added pressure.

"School's been ok?" He queried as she'd told him every day a little of what she'd been doing at school but he'd missed a lot of it as focusing had not been his strong point and he was sure she'd probably told him a lot more than he could actually remember. He didn't like feeling like he'd missed anything.

"Me and Anna have been playing houses, it's really fun. Oh and yesterday we made something for you. I'll go get it." Lucy started and with the last comment moved out of his arms and got off the bed, hurrying out the room. Edward watched her go, a bit bemused but curious to know what she'd made. Lucy reappeared moments later with her school bag and made her way back over to him. Once back on the bed she ferreted through her bag before pulling out a large blue card that was covered in glitter along with a slightly smaller yellow one that had a flower drawn on it in red crayon. She handed them to Edward who looked at them, seeing the one that had covered his bed in glitter also had a flower drawn on the front, this time in yellow crayon before opening them up. The glitter one had the message 'To Daddy, Get Well Soon, Love Lucy' written inside it and the other had the message 'To Lucy's Daddy, Get Well Soon, From Anna.' Edward smiled as he read them and looked back to Lucy.

"Thank you." He said as he reached over to stand them on his bedside cabinet and she grinned, missing the grimace the movement caused him.

"Mrs. Cope helped us make them when I told her I hadn't done my reading homework because you were in hospital so couldn't help me." She told him, "I was going to give you them last night but I forgot my bag."

"Well I love them, tell Anna I said thank you." Edward told her, "Now what was that about missed reading homework?"

She shuffled slightly and looked down playing with the fingers on the arm he still had wrapped around her.

"I couldn't do it." She mumbled causing Edward to reach out and stroke her hair to get her to look at him.

"Course you can baby. Do you have it here?" He asked and she nodded, taking it out of her bag. He was starting to get tired again but he thought he'd be ok for another half hour or so and he wanted to get things back to normal.

"Come on then." He encouraged, holding his arms out again so she moved back onto his lap, book in hand. She settled down as they usually did with one of Edward's arms around her and the other helping to hold the book. Lucy opened it up and got to the page that they'd last read and started to try and read it, Edward helping her as she faltered and got stuck on new or larger words.

By the time they'd got to the end of where Lucy had to read up to Lucy could see he was getting tired so she packed her book away before turning round to kiss him on the cheek.

"You should sleep now." She told him and he nodded slightly knowing she was right as sleep was slowly taking over him anyway. Lucy moved off his lap, letting him shuffle back to be laid down then she pulled the cover back over him and kissed his cheek again.

"Night night Daddy." She said, climbing down off the bed, "Love you."

"Night night, love you too sweetheart." He mumbled back just before sleep claimed him. Lucy stayed for a moment longer making sure he was fully asleep before she quietly left his room to go and find Emmett to play for a while, leaving the door ajar so she'd hear if he needed something.

* * *

><p>Edward woke up the next morning before anyone else feeling slightly better than he had the day before. He was happy to find a pyjama clad Lucy curled up beside him and played with her hair while watching her sleeping. She looked so content that he didn't want to disturb her and glancing to his alarm clock it was too early to be awake anyway as it read six am. He stayed where he was for a while but for once he was wide awake and as he laid there he had the urge to get up and have a long bath, something he had been longing to do since the attack but hadn't had the chance for.<p>

Knowing that if he woke anybody up moving around he wouldn't be left in peace he set about getting up as quietly as he possibly could. He carefully removed his arms from around Lucy and gently kissed her head before trying to shuffle himself out of bed. He managed to get to the side of the bed without waking her up and then started to try and pull himself up to be sat but moving around was still awkward as any movement in his upper body caused shots of pain through his ribs and shoulder and his left arm still protested any use. After using his bedside cabinet to help, he managed to get upright but was swamped with the now familiar dizzy feeling as the ache in his head started to thump. Once things had stop swimming in front of his eyes he slowly swung his legs round so he could stand. Pushing himself up from the bed he stood by it, trying to figure out if he'd even manage to get to the bathroom. Being vertical really didn't seem to agree with him right now and he could tell he was going to be out of breath by the time he got there, his chest was already feeling tight again.

Determined he was going to get his bath, he persevered, slowly walking through his room while trying his best to ignore the dizziness. He reached the bathroom and closed the door behind him so he could lean on it for a bit before trying to get his bath sorted. He'd been right with his assumption of being out of breath and the short walk had totally exhausted him. He was disgusted with himself for how weak he was, just getting out of bed should not have been that hard and it made him more determined to fight through it.

When he felt like he was less likely to collapse, Edward moved over to the bath and turned the taps on before reaching for the bottle of bubble bath that sat on the side. He poured a blob into the bath before sitting down on the edge of it and looking down at himself. He was still in the clothes he'd worn to leave the hospital so he set about removing them and by the time he'd managed that and his clothes were in a pile by his feet the bath was full so he carefully stood up before getting into the bath, sinking down into the hot water and bubbles.

He stayed in the bath for a long time, enjoying the soothing effect the hot water was having on his tired body. He was just about to start actually washing himself when the bathroom door creaked open and he saw Lucy coming around it, closing it behind her again.

"Daddy?" She asked, walking over to the side of the bath.

"Morning Luce." He answered and deciding that Edward seemed ok Lucy crossed over to the toilet, put the lid down then sat on it so she could stay and talk to him while he finished his bath. Edward was quite happy for her to stay as it was what normally happened, Lucy always getting bored while he was having a bath and coming in to talk to him. He liked the return of their usual routines and wanted more of them.

"Can you go and get me some clean clothes?" He asked Lucy once he was finished with his bath and realised he hadn't taken any clothes through with him. Lucy nodded and got up, leaving the bathroom and returning a few minutes later with a pile of clean clothes. She then left again knowing that Edward preferred to be left on his own to get dressed. Once Lucy had closed the door again Edward set about trying to get out of the bath, which proved to be a rather slow, painful and difficult task much to his annoyance. When he was finally out, he crossed the bathroom to get a towel before carefully drying himself. Dressing he found to be slightly easier than it had been the day before, which cheered him slightly as it had to mean he was healing even if it was slowly.

Once dressed, he let the plug out of the bath before going back through to his room where he found Lucy had climbed back into his bed. As he half collided with a set of drawers she looked up at him with worry filled eyes before jumping off the bed and going to his side, taking hold of his hand as he tried to steady himself.

"Daddy, are you ok?" She asked and Edward nodded.

"I'm fine, just a little dizzy." He answered, letting her lead him back over to his bed where he sat down on the edge of it. He didn't know where the dizziness was coming from. The headache and pain in his chest and shoulder he was well familiar with from the hospital but the dizziness was new. He did remember Dr. Cullen saying something about watching out for lingering symptoms from his concussion and wondered if that was the cause of it. Whatever it was he wished it would go away. He could try to ignore or hide the pain but if he kept getting dizzy others were going to notice it like Lucy was now.

"Should I go get Uncle Emmett?" She asked, not convinced he was fine if he was feeling dizzy and falling into furniture.

"No, I'm fine. It'll pass in a minute." He told her yet she still looked at him sceptically.

"Honestly." He added and Lucy realised that he wasn't going to want Emmett even if he really did need his help. Not wanting to upset him she decided to settle for his answer of being fine but she wanted him to stay still for a while so she got up onto his bed beside him thinking that if they talked for a while he'd stay where he was.

"Why don't you like Uncle Emmett?" She asked causing Edward to look at her, unsure of how to answer that. He'd made it pretty clear during the week that he didn't want Emmett or Alice around and although she hadn't trusted them to begin with they hadn't done anything to upset him the entire time other than being there. She knew they'd upset him before but he'd always taught her not to hold grudges and to forgive people when they really meant their apologies. From what she could tell, Emmett had done nothing but try to help since he'd arrived at the hospital and she didn't understand why Edward apparently disliked him so much. He'd said sorry and he seemed to have meant it.

"It's not that I don't like him..." Edward started, trying to think how he could word it for it to make sense to her. "It's just he won't be around for that long..."

"Why?" Lucy interrupted, no one else had said anything about him having to leave and he'd given her the impression he'd be staying for a while.

"Once I'm better he'll have to go back to my mum and dad." Edward answered, and could see by the confusion on Lucy's face that she didn't understand why that meant he had to leave them. There was no way out of this and although he didn't want to explain it all to her he knew he had to tell her something or she wouldn't understand.

"My mum and dad don't really like me. They don't want me around or Emmett and Alice around me. I don't want to explain why so they just don't." He told her hoping she'd leave it at that as he definitely couldn't tell her the reason his parents hated him. Luckily Lucy knew he didn't like talking about his parents, but she still didn't get why that meant Edward didn't like Uncle Emmett.

"But why does that make you not like Uncle Emmett?"

"It's just easier if I don't get too attached to having him around." He answered and although Lucy still didn't really understand his reasoning she gave up with the questions as she didn't like the sad look that had taken over his face and thought it best to leave it alone. Thankful that she didn't ask another question but seeing the confusion still there Edward looked around the room trying to find something else to talk about but found nothing of interest until he looked back to Lucy and saw her pyjamas.

"Why don't you go and get dressed and I'll get us some breakfast." He suggested, wanting to try and continue getting back into their old routines and prove that he was capable of looking after himself and Lucy. Lucy's questions had reminded him why he didn't want Emmett around and he didn't want to be dependent on him for any longer than he had to be so the sooner he could prove he was ok on his own the better.

"Shouldn't Uncle Emmett make breakfast? I can go and wake him." Lucy said, unsure that Edward would be fine standing up for that long. She thought he'd be better back in bed or at least sat down somewhere. Edward however was now determined that he was going to make breakfast so shook his head.

"No, I'll do it. I'll be fine. You just go and get dressed." He told her and not wanting to argue with him Lucy left his room for her own, doing as he had said and getting dressed.

Once he was sure Lucy was gone Edward slowly stood up again before making his way to the kitchen. On his way through the living room he found Emmett was still asleep on the sofa so tried his best to be quiet again, knowing that if he woke Emmett up he'd be back in bed before he could say anything. When he made it into the kitchen he had to take a seat at the table for a minute before setting about getting breakfast. The dizziness wasn't so bad anymore but instead he had a rather painful headache that was making focussing difficult and he would have taken a couple of his pain killers to get rid of it but he'd left them in his bedroom and he didn't want to have to walk all the way back through there just to come back to the kitchen again. He was bound to wake up Emmett if he tried that. Working out that if he wasn't at least half way through getting breakfast ready by the time Lucy reappeared she'd most likely go and get Emmett Edward got up and started. He filled the kettle first for his coffee then went to the fridge to get the milk out which he sat on the table.

He hadn't noticed that Lucy had appeared, now dressed, as he was concentrating on what he needed for breakfast. She stood in the doorway and watched him, ready to go and wake Emmett if Edward showed any sign at all of not being able to manage. That came in the form of Edward dropping the box of cereal he'd taken from the cupboard and knocking the bowl he'd taken out off the units. The bowl shattered when it made contact with the kitchen floor so Edward dropped down to pick it up but froze, crouched down, his hands resting on the floor and his head bowed. His headache was really hurting and the dizziness had returned which was what had caused him to drop the cereal.

Lucy was pretty sure the crash the bowl had made would have woken Emmett so she crossed the kitchen to Edward, being careful to avoid any of the broken bowl pieces. Edward was still crouched down with his head low so when Lucy reached him she placed her hand on his back to let him know she was there. He slowly lifted his head to look at her and she saw the muddle of emotions in his eyes.

"It's ok Daddy." She told him gently, wanting to make him feel better. He tried to smile but by then he needed his pain killers too much for it to be anything other than a grimace.

"Maybe you should go and get Uncle Emmett." He mumbled, hating the fact that he needed to ask for his help but knowing there was no other option. They'd all been right. He couldn't look after himself or Lucy.

"No need, I'm already here." Emmett announced as he crossed over to the pair and held a hand out to help Edward up. Edward took it and let Emmett pull him up before dropping down into a seat at the table.

"You should have woken me, I'd have made breakfast." Emmett said, looking at Edward concerned. Edward didn't say anything but rested his head down on the table.

"Have you taken your pain killers yet?" Emmett asked.

"No." Edward's reply was muffled, "Wanted to get breakfast."

"Ok, I'll go and get them then clear up in here and sort out breakfast." Emmett told them before leaving the kitchen. Knowing she shouldn't touch the broken bowl Lucy left it for Emmett to clean up and climbed up onto the chair next to the one Edward was sat in and stroked his hair.

"Daddy?" She asked, wanting him to talk to her so she could know what was wrong and how to help.

"Sorry Luce, I thought I could do it." He muttered, still keeping his head down, waiting for the pain killers before he attempted movement again.

"It doesn't matter." She told him, starting to get upset over how much it was bothering Edward that he couldn't do things yet. He was ill and they had Emmet there to help, it shouldn't have been a big deal.

"It does, how can I look after us if I can't even make breakfast?" He asked, turning his head slightly to look at Lucy, for once not trying to hide the tears that were beginning to well up in his eyes and threatening to fall. He just wanted everything to be back to how it was meant to be. He was sick of being so weak and letting her down all the time.

"Uncle Emmett will help." She stated softly, "Until you're better."

"But.." Edward tried to argue but found himself choked with tears and unable to get his words out. Lucy reached out and wiped away the tears that had begun to slide easily down his cheeks, leaving their trail and to Edward showing him to be even more pathetic and worthless than he was already feeling. Lucy tried her best to catch all his tears and stop their tracks but Edward was being over taken by them and there was nothing she could do to stop that. She gave up trying to wipe them away and let them fall but climbed across onto his knee and wrapped her arms around his neck, letting him hug her tightly.

Emmett returned to the kitchen with Edward's pain killers and on seeing him crying with Lucy failing to calm him down he sat the bottle of pills on the table before gently placing his hand on Edward's shoulder and squeezing it slightly. Edward looked up to him, still unable to stop his tears, he just felt so useless and with everything else it had overwhelmed him.

"Sorry." He managed to mutter. Emmett looked at him confused, not knowing what he was apologising for but, deciding he had to do something in response, he crouched down so he was on Edward's eye level and returned his hand to his shoulder for some form of comfort.

"You've got nothing to be sorry for Edward. I'm here to help you because I want to be and that's what I intend on doing. When you're well enough you won't need me around and I'll go if you want me to but even then I'd rather stay in your life. It's me that should be saying sorry for not being here all the times you've needed family in the last five years, so never feel like you have to apologise to me because quite frankly you don't. I have a lot to make up to you." He told him. Edward just looked down at Lucy. He didn't want to argue with Emmett but he couldn't help but disagree. As far as he could see he was just going to be causing hassle to Emmett in the long run and his pathetic state at the moment required apologising for.

Deciding he'd said all he could Emmett opened up Edward's painkillers and tipped two of them out into his hand before closing the bottle again.

"Here, I'll just get you a glass of water." He said, getting Edward to look at him and take the painkillers. Emmett tipped them into his hand before crossing the kitchen to the sink to get Edward some water. Once Edward was holding the glass of water and was taking the pills Emmett turned to the broken bowl and started picking all the pieces up. After collecting them all he threw them in the bin before he found a dust pan and brush in a cupboard and cleared up the spilt cereal. That all done he turned back to a now lot calmer Edward and Lucy, Lucy still sat on Edward's knee but Edward was now only holding one arm loosely around her to stop her falling off rather than hugging her tightly.

"Fancy pancakes?" Emmett asked, having noticed that there wasn't much cereal left anymore as he'd cleared it up and they were one of the few things he could cook without needing instructions.

"Yes please!" Lucy replied happily while Edward just nodded slightly. "Can I help?" she added, already starting to climb down from Edward's lap. Emmett glanced to Edward first to make sure she could help with things like that and when he saw Edward smile slightly, he looked back to Lucy grinning.

"Course you can." He told her and Lucy grinned back at him. Edward watched from his seat at the table as Lucy helped Emmett to make pancakes, covering herself in flour in the process. The kitchen was filled with the sound of her laughing which soon became infectious as Emmett joined in and Edward managed to find a proper smile that lasted longer than a few seconds. After a slightly longer than necessary time as Lucy insisted that she help Emmett to stir the mixture, the pancakes were finally ready and placed on the table in front of each of them. Lucy happily started eating hers, her legs swinging as she sat, Emmett also started to eat his, watching Lucy with a smile but Edward just poked his as he also watched Lucy. He wasn't really feeling particularly hungry. Lucy knew he was watching her and looked up to him, immediately noticing that Edward wasn't eating again.

"Daddy, you should eat." She told him causing him to look down at his plate and stick his fork into a pancake.

"I know." He muttered before tearing a small piece away and eating it slowly. In the end Edward only ate one pancake while Lucy ate two and Emmett ate four. Emmett got up when they were all finished and cleared the plates away, knowing that there'd be no point trying to get Edward to eat anymore and that it was good he had a least eaten something.

"You want coffee, Edward?" Emmett asked as he noticed the filled kettle.

"Yes please." He answered, startling Emmett slightly by the fact it hadn't been mumbled and was a proper answer. He turned to look at Edward to see him smiling slightly so returned it before setting about making the coffee, wondering what had caused the sudden change in Edward.

Edward had been thinking about what Lucy had said in the morning and what Emmett had said while he'd been eating breakfast and had realised that maybe both of them had been right with the fact he should let Emmett help him. It didn't make him feel any better about himself but if Emmett had meant what he'd said he knew that at the moment he'd be stupid to throw his help back in his face. He knew he wouldn't be better for at least a couple of weeks yet and if Emmett was going to be around he guessed he might as well try to enjoy having his brother there for a while. He also knew that he was worrying Lucy a lot at the moment, and he really didn't want to do that, she liked Emmett and was wanting him to like him too so if he did he thought it might settle her a bit as well.

Emmett sat back down at the table again when the coffee had been made and handed Edward a mug and Lucy a glass of milk. Deciding if he was going to try and get on with Emmett he ought to try and start a conversation Edward searched for something to talk about while staring into his coffee. Finally finding something he looked up to find Emmett had been watching him.

"Is Alice coming round today?" Edward asked, causing Lucy to look up at Emmett too. Alice had promised to play dolls with her once they were back at the flat.

"I'm not sure, I can ring her and find out if you want." He answered and Edward shrugged not sure if he wanted her to come over or not. He didn't want to cause any more hassle for them than he already was and the original question had just been something to say to break the silence.

"You feeling any better now?" Emmett asked assuming Edward wasn't going to say anything else about Alice. He'd ring her later though and get her round as if Edward was showing signs of actually talking to them now he knew Alice would want to be there.

"A bit." He replied, his headache was clearing up a bit as was his dizziness but he still had the general achy feeling. The joint pain he'd been experiencing before the attack had returned once they'd lowered the dosage of his pain medication but Dr. Cullen hadn't wanted him to develop a dependency on them so he just had to put up with it. He preferred the aches to the hazy feeling the drugs had left him with anyway.

"Daddy, can we watch a film?" Lucy asked when it became apparent their conversation had died and knowing Edward wasn't up to playing or anything. He nodded and smiled gratefully to her as she was giving him a reason to stay out of bed that even Emmett couldn't argue with.

"Sure." He answered and started to try and push himself up from his seat. Emmett was soon by his side, helping him to stand and steady himself before he followed Lucy through to the leaving room. Emmett watched them until he could see Edward safely seated on the sofa then he turned back to the mess they'd made in the kitchen and started cleaning.

Just as he finished putting the dishes away he heard Edward coughing which reminded him he hadn't taken his antibiotics yet so he got a glass of water and found the rest of the pills they'd brought home from the hospital. The film was already started when he entered the living room and Lucy was curled up on Edward's knee as he stroked her hair. Lucy's attention was fixed firmly on the film but Edward noticed Emmett entering and gratefully took the pills and water from him.

Edward managed to pay attention to the film for a while but soon lost interest as he started to feel tired and headachy again. Giving up on concentrating he looked away from the TV and to the chair where Emmett had settled before to see he wasn't there. Edward hadn't noticed him leave and briefly wondered where he'd gone and why but he returned to the room a minute later and glanced to Edward first, noticing his curious gaze. He returned the gaze and when Edward mouthed 'where did you go' not wanting to disturb Lucy from her film he pulled his mobile out from his pocket as he sat down showing Edward that he'd been on the phone. Edward nodded slightly and decided that that was enough information to stop him being curious so he tried to watch the film again but found he'd lost all interest in it.

Lucy hadn't noticed any of the movements in the room, too into the film and didn't notice at all Edward slowly falling asleep. Emmett did but decided to leave Edward to sleep and Lucy to watch the film until Alice got there. He'd rung her earlier and told her that Edward had started talking to him and being a bit more friendly. She'd been happy to hear that and even happier when Emmett told her Edward had asked if she was coming round. Hearing that she'd told Emmett she'd be round later on in the afternoon. They'd also made plans for the evening while on the phone, including ordering in a take out in the hope that it might tempt Edward to eat a bit more, Alice being just as concerned as Emmett was about his apparent lack of appetite.

It was another hour before Edward woke up, and that was caused by loud knocking at the door. Lucy was stirred from her film that had nearly finished and Emmett leapt up to go and answer it, already knowing it would be Alice.

"How is Edward?" She asked as soon as she was in and Emmett had closed the door behind her.

"He seems ok now really, he had a slight mishap over trying to get breakfast this morning but since that he's been talking to me ok. We were watching a film and he fell asleep, he's only just woken up again." He answered.

"So he's accepting help now?" She asked and Emmett could see the devious smile trying to break free of her indifferent expression.

"A little. Whatever you're planning, no. I don't want to push this. He could easily change his mind." Emmett warned. He didn't think Edward had found the new clothes or noticed the fully stocked kitchen yet so he was still waiting for the fallout from that. The last thing they needed was for Alice to take things too far and ruin any progress they'd made with him.

"Don't worry, this one can wait but him talking to us will make it so much easier." She smiled and knowing there would be no arguing with her he just shook his head and sighed.

"I don't think I even want to know what you're planning, at least that way he can't blame me for whatever it is."

"He'll like it, I promise. Now shall we go through?" She asked, referring to the fact they were still stood out in the corridor. Emmett laughed slightly and nodded, leading the way through into the living room where both Edward and Lucy were watching the doorway curiously.

"Who was it?" Edward asked as Emmett came through. He didn't answer and just stepped out of the way to let Alice through.

"Hi Edward." She greeted as he saw her and smiled, "How are you doing?"

"Ok thanks you?" He replied finding he was genuinely pleased to see his little sister. She could be over powering and meddlesome but she never failed to brighten a room when she walked in smiling the way she was. Now he'd decided not to ignore them he could actually enjoy her being around for however long they'd be there.

"I'm great." She replied, happy that Edward was talking to her normally. She said hello to Lucy as she sat down next to her and Edward on the sofa.

"Hello!" Lucy replied brightly, happy to see her auntie again, "We were watching a film."

"So I see," Alice commented, glancing towards the screen where the credits were now showing.

"But it's finished now. Will you play with me?" Lucy asked, her face lighting up as she looked at Alice hopefully. She'd quickly learnt during the last week that Alice was always happy to play with her even if it was just joining in with her colouring in while Edward had been asleep in the hospital and she had promised to play dolls with her.

"Luce she's only just walked in the door." Edward commented, laughing slightly and ruffling her hair causing her to quickly glance at him before looking back to Alice.

"It's ok Edward. I'd love to play with you Lucy." She answered so Lucy grinned before sliding off Edward's knee and running off to her room to fetch her toys. As soon as she'd gone Alice looked to Edward, concern crossing her face for the first time since she'd walked in.

"Are you really ok?" She asked, wanting to make sure he was and he hadn't just said that because Lucy was around.

"Yeah, as ok as I can be anyway." He answered smiling slightly, she studied him for a moment before smiling back and leaning forward, pulling him into a hug. He gingerly returned it, grimacing at the pain that shot through him. It wasn't quite the same as hugging Lucy.

"Urm...Alice...this kind of...well...hurts a bit..." He mumbled when she didn't appear to be letting go too soon. She instantly released him and sat back, looking at him worriedly again.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry, I didn't think..." She rambled but Edward shook his head to halt her apologies.

"It's fine." He told her, smiling slightly, "Honestly" He added as she just looked at him doubtfully.

"I didn't think, I am really sorry..." She started again but Edward just shook his head and looked to Emmett for help but that came in the form of Lucy coming through the door with an armful of dolls.

"It doesn't matter. Luce hurry up and stop Auntie Alice going daft over here." He said light heartedly causing Lucy to look at him, slightly startled and Alice to smile a bit. Lucy did however hurry up and dropped the dolls down in front of the sofa.

"Daddy, can we get the bath out?" She asked as she stood in front of him while Alice slid off the sofa and down onto the floor with the dolls. She too looked up to Edward wondering what Lucy meant.

"Sure, just be careful not to get too much water everywhere." He answered, knowing Lucy meant the small white plastic baby bath that he'd had for her before Lucy had commandeered it for her dolls. It was only occasionally allowed out due to the fact water invariably ended up all over the floor, Lucy and anything else that happened to be nearby. As both Alice and Emmett where there though he figured it would be ok, and he probably wouldn't be allowed to tidy up after it anyway. Remembering Lucy would need a hand getting the bath out due to its size and where it was kept he looked to Emmett who was watching everyone else.

"She'll need a hand to get it out. It's one of those baby baths like Mum had for us. It's on top of the wardrobe in my room." He said to which Emmett nodded and stood up.

"Ok, I'll go and get it." He said before leaving the room. Edward looked to the dolls on the floor, and wanted to join in, feeling bad about how little he could do for Lucy at the moment. He watched as Lucy ran off to go and get some more things she'd need for bathing her dolls, including their hair brush, a few changes of clothes and a little pink towel Edward had again used for her when she'd only been a baby. After Lucy had left the room he looked to Alice who was sat with one of the dolls on her lap, stroking its hair and smoothing it down.

"Could you help me down?" He asked her tentatively. He hated having to ask for help but he wanted to join in the game and at that moment all his limbs felt stiff and tired and he didn't think he'd manage to get down onto the floor by himself without causing himself a great deal of pain.

"Sure." She answered hurriedly putting the doll down and moving to be knelt in front of Edward where she reached out to take hold of his arm and support him as he slowly moved forward and down onto the floor. The grimace on his face as he moved caused her heart to twinge slightly at the thought of the pain he must be in but he didn't seem to let it bother him as he shuffled himself into a slightly more comfortable position on the floor. Once sure he was settled as best he could be he reached forward and picked up the doll he normally played with. It was one that reminded him of Lucy. It was only a baby doll so had no hair and Lucy normally didn't hold much interest for it but the eyes always caught Edward's attention and had been the major reason he had bought it for her. They were the same shade of green as hers and had a slight twinkle to them as the light caught them. Preoccupied with looking at the doll he hardly noticed as Lucy returned and dropped an armful of doll accessories on the floor next to him.

"This it?" Emmett broke him from his thoughts as he appeared carrying the white plastic bath.

"Yup, Lucy you got the mat for it?" Edward asked looking to her and she shook her head before running off back to her room to collect the plastic mat that would try and protect the floor.

"When she comes back with the mat she'll show you where the bowl is to fill it up. It's too heavy for her to carry when full." Edward told Emmett.

"Ok. This is going to be messy isn't it?" He asked, causing Edward to grin in a manner that took them all straight back to childhood.

"Oh yes" His grin widened, "And I'm ill so I won't have to clean it all up." He finished as they all fell into laughter. That was the Edward they all knew and loved. Lucy walked back into the room and looked around at all the laughing faces before settling on Edward's. He stopped laughing but looked to her with a mischievous grin that was very similar to the one he often saw on her face.

"Uncle Emmett's going to help you fill the bath up, then you can have as much fun as you like, don't worry about the mess." He told her making her giggle and move across to give him a quick hug before crossing the room to Emmett, grabbing his hand and dragging him out towards the bathroom. Edward and Alice could hear Lucy telling Emmett where the bowl was and pretty soon they both returned, Emmett with a large bowl of water and Lucy with her bottle of bubble bath. They carefully carried them over to the bath that Alice had now moved onto the plastic mat and Emmett waited for Lucy to add some bubble bath to the bath before he tipped the bowl of water in. He then left to get another bowl full as Lucy knelt down by the bath and stuck her arm in to stir it around a bit and make the bubbles. Emmett returned and added the last of the water then sat down by the bath as well.

Lucy's face was already alight with joy, Edward's mimicking it to a lesser extent just because she was happy. Lucy picked up her favourite doll and undressed it before placing into the bath and starting to wash it with Alice helping. Water started to splash everywhere instantly, catching Emmett who then decided maybe dolls weren't his thing so he stood up and glancing around for something else to do before realising it was lunch time.

"I'll go make us some lunch." He told the rest who paid very little attention to him, all playing with the dolls, Edward now carefully drying the first one and Lucy bathing another one. He knew they'd heard though so left the room for the kitchen where he started to look for something he could make them to eat. Deciding he fancied a cup of tea he put the kettle on first before looking to the cupboards and fridge. If it had just been him it would have been junk food but he knew he had to do better for Edward so after searching through everything he eventually decided the tins of vegetable soup Alice had stocked up seemed like a good idea so he took a few out to heat up.

Back in the living room Lucy was giggling as Alice looked down at the large wet patch spreading across her top. As Edward knew she would, Lucy was quite happily spilling water everywhere. He joined in her laughing though, deciding not to care and to just join in the fun, Alice soon joined in as well and the game continued.

Emmett returned after a while with two cups of tea and a glass of milk announcing that lunch was ready. Putting the drinks down he went back through to the kitchen and came back with two bowls of soup, handing the smallest one to Lucy and the other one to Edward. Deciding moving would be painful Edward chose to remain on the floor to eat his and Lucy shuffled round a bit to be sat next to him with hers. Emmett returned again with another bowl which he gave to Alice and a bunch of spoons which he passed around. He then went to get his own lunch and once he'd returned and sat down they all began to eat.

They were half way through their lunch when they heard knocking on the door. Edward looked to Emmett, feeling slightly panicked. Anyone who would be visiting was already in the flat so he couldn't see any reason for someone to be knocking.

"Want me to get that?" Alice asked, missing Edward's panic but Emmett hadn't and quickly put his bowl down.

"No, I'll get it." He said, standing up and leaving the room. Lucy was watching Edward, feeling that something wasn't right but he noticed so gave her a small smile to suggest it was all ok before looking back to the door and watching it. He couldn't hear raised voices so he guessed that was good but he still couldn't think of anyone who would be visiting as Bella had said she'd visit in a couple of days and she was the only person he thought would come round. Alice had now noticed Edward's tension and was watching the door too while Lucy had shuffled right up to Edward so she was leant against him and everyone's lunch lay forgotten on the floor. The door finally opened and Emmett walked in, Edward instantly seeing the confusion on his face which did not help his nerves.

"You've got some visitors." He announced and Edward was just about to ask who when Dr. Cullen walked in behind Emmett. Edward was still confused as he knew he'd said he'd be checking up on him but he hadn't expected him so soon and it didn't explain the look on Emmett's face. He was looking past the doctor, back towards the corridor and Edward couldn't see why until Dr. Cullen moved further into the room and a woman stepped up beside him. All Edward registered was the striking resemblance to his mother before he went into panic mode, wanting to get away before he could be told what a disappointment to the family he was again. With his fight or flight response set firmly into flight he quickly moved backwards, grabbing hold of the sofa and attempted to stand up. Unfortunately all his actions were too quick making his head swim and with a yell of pain he fell back down onto the sofa landing on his sore shoulder. All eyes snapped to him and Lucy scrambled to her feet and moved beside him as Emmett also moved to try and help while Edward lay on the sofa with his eyes tight shut as he tried to block out the pain he'd just caused his shoulder with the crash landing.

It wasn't until he felt Emmett trying to roll him over from his side onto his back that he opened his eyes again and when he did, rather than concentrating on the people fussing around him, they locked on the woman standing frozen in the middle of his living room. He could see now that it wasn't his mother, but she did look like a slightly younger version of her and he remembered the face he thought he'd seen outside his hospital room.

"It was you I saw at the hospital wasn't it? Who are you?" He asked causing everyone else to freeze around them as they all looked towards her apart from Dr Cullen who continued to look worriedly at Edward trying to access if he'd done any damage to his injured shoulder.

"Esme Cullen." The woman answered quietly, "Carlisle's wife and your Aunt."


	24. Chapter 22 Hateful, Spineless Fools

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

AN - Sorry if this chapter ends up being rubbish. It turned out very hard to write and Edward wasn't co-operating at all. Also if theres any editing issues I've missed I apologise, I wanted to get this posted today but that meant editing it with a migraine. Spell checking and grammer mistakes are not the easiest of things to spot when your eyesights gone iffy.

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><p><strong>Chapter 22 - Hateful, Spineless Fools.<strong>

Edward just stared at her. If it was true it made no sense. He knew he'd never been told about any aunt or uncles and if she was married to Dr. Cullen who was Garrett's cousin that meant he'd been working for family for three years without knowing. Surely that wasn't possible. Garrett had definitely never alluded to knowing who he was and he'd always trusted him. He didn't want to believe it, didn't want to believe Garrett would have lied to him like that. There was also the question of why they would have hidden from him all these years, what would the point have been? To keep a secret like that, for that long could only mean something bad for him so no, he defiantly did not want to believe her words.

The problem with not believing it was the woman standing in front of him looked like a clone of his mother. She had the same hair colour, face structure and the same eyes that he and Lucy had inherited so there was no questioning that she was telling the truth. Feeling totally confused he looked to his brother and sister, finding that Alice looked just as confused as he felt while Emmett looked uneasy making him wonder if he had known about this before. If he had, why had he never mentioned it? This really couldn't mean anything good.

"Why have I never heard of you before?" He finally asked as sitting in a stunned silence was not going to get them anywhere.

"Probably because your dad hates me and your mum's a spineless fool." She answered and he could see the anger on her face as she mentioned them, "The last and only time I ever got the chance to see you was at your grandmother's funeral. You would have been two, Emmett four and Alice was only a couple of months old and I doubt your parents would ever have talked about me. As far as they're concerned I don't exist."

That choice of words struck a chord with Edward and the badly tamed panic and dread he'd been feeling slowly changed to curiosity as he looked at Esme in a new light. He knew all too well that his parent's were capable of cutting family members out of their lives like they never existed. Now he wanted to know what she'd done, as standing there she looked respectable enough dressed in a knee length black pencil skirt, pale green silky blouse, fine knitted cardigan a couple of shades darker than the top and black shiny high heeled shoes and she was married to a doctor. She looked exactly like the type of person his parents' favoured and always tried to impress. To be cast out like him she must have caused one hell of a scandal in the past.

"They were arguing about you a few weeks ago." Emmett spoke up after a minute of silence, making everyone stare at him while he fidgeted uncomfortably.

"You knew we had an Aunt and Uncle?" Alice asked quietly, shocked that he wouldn't have told her. They hadn't always been close but once Edward was gone that changed and during the last couple of years as they'd tried to find him they'd come to be as close as they each used to be to Edward. Hidden family members would have been a good place to start looking or asking for help.

"Not really. I mean I did wonder when Dad decided to tell everyone Edward had gone to stay with an Aunt but when I asked Mum about it she wouldn't say anything. I just heard them arguing over someone called Esme trying to get in touch through Dad's office. He wasn't happy about it." He replied awkwardly.

"I was trying to find out what was going on but they won't talk to me." Esme commented. She was surprised Ed had even mentioned it to Elizabeth but she was glad she had ruffled him. If they'd done what it appeared they had, disowning Edward, then they deserved all the trouble she could cause them. Cutting her out of their lives had been bad, but doing it to their own child was beyond reason and totally unforgivable as far as Esme was concerned.

"Why?" Edward found himself asking. This was too confusing for his pain addled brain and it was only serving to bring back the headache the painkillers were trying to fight. "And why wait until now to turn up?"

"That's a long story and can wait until I've checked you over." Carlisle interrupted their conversation. He'd known this would come as a shock but he hadn't expected Edward to try and run on first sight. If he had, he would have held Esme off a little longer. As it was he was worried Edward had caused more damage as he could see the tension in his body and the frequent grimaces from pain.

"I'm fine." Edward tried to wave him off being much more interested in what Esme had to say. He'd never come across anyone who knew his parents that had talked about them the way she did. Everything she'd said so far suggested she'd seen the same side of them that he had and he wanted to know more about it. Plus if his parent's were the reason he didn't know about her then maybe Garrett hadn't known he was related to him so hadn't been lying to him for years. The fact she was there was also giving him hope that maybe there was some family that wanted to be part of his life that his father would have no influence over. Of course she could have been there for an entirely different reason so he wanted to know what was going on before he could let himself hope too much.

Carlisle however wasn't easily fooled and had no intention of letting Edward hide how he was feeling. Now Edward knew who they were he didn't have to stick to professional detachment. They were family so he was going to look after him whether he wanted him to or not. Stepping closer to the sofa he reached for Edward's shoulder, gently pressing down around it before carefully lifting his arm, watching his face for any sign of pain.

"That hurts." Edward grumbled trying to pull his arm back and glaring slightly at Carlisle but not phased at all by that Carlisle just smiled slightly, happy with what he'd found.

"Well you haven't done any more damage, it's just the previous bruising. It should settle down again and the painkillers you're already on will help."

"Great, so why won't our parent's talk to you?" Edward asked, his attention focused once more on Esme. He wasn't going to be distracted from getting some answers, he needed to know what was going on.

Before she spoke Esme glanced to Carlisle who just shrugged. It was her story to tell and they'd have to find out at some point. With the trust issues Edward seemed to have where his family were concerned it would probably be better for her to just tell them everything right from the start so there could be no misunderstandings. Hopefully total honesty would also help them find out the full story of what had happened with Edward as he might feel more like sharing if he knew what had happened in the past. They needed him to know that if they'd had a choice, they would have been there for him all along so he could trust they wanted to help him now.

Unsure of what was going on Lucy climbed back onto the sofa now that Edward seemed to have recovered from his fall. Seeing what she was doing Edward dragged himself up to sit with his back leant against the arm rest so she could crawl onto his lap and that movement alerted Emmett to the fact they had nowhere near enough chairs in the room for the number of people as Edward only had a sofa and one chair. If this was going to be a long story everyone would need seats so he went through to the kitchen and brought through a couple of the wooden chairs from there. He offered one to Carlisle before sitting down on the other, letting Esme take the comfy chair he'd had earlier while Alice joined Edward and Lucy on the sofa.

"Ok, guess I'll start right at the beginning then." Esme started once everyone had settled, "Your mother and I were very close when we were growing up even though I was six years younger than her. She was my best friend and she always had time for me. I really looked up to her, she was outgoing, cheerful, kind, smart, beautiful and popular which was everything I wanted to be. She'd spend entire evenings playing with me or helping me with my homework and she'd often take me out with her if she was going shopping or something. She never seemed to listen when her friends would complain about me tagging along. Then when I was ten she met Ed for the first time at the library, she was sixteen and he was eighteen. She was besotted with him from the first moment she saw him; he was handsome, intelligent, rich and charming. I was so excited for her when she told me about him and I couldn't wait to meet him but then she brought him round to the house and there was something about him that I just didn't like the instant he stepped through the front door. At the time I had no idea what it was but I just had this feeling that he was bad for her so once he'd left for the evening I told her as we never kept secrets from each other. She said I was being silly, that there was nothing wrong with him and if I'd just give him a chance I'd like him as much as she did and used the fact our parents had both loved him to convince me.

I tried to do as she asked, but each time he visited nothing changed except the bad feeling got worse. I didn't like being around him, he was perfectly courteous and polite but there was this look in his eyes that scared me a little. I'd seen the same look in Liz's friends' eyes when she took me shopping with them, like I was just an annoyance to be tolerated but from Ed it was worse. I tried talking to him hoping that I was seeing things but he never had time for me and would only ask where Liz was and then she'd appear and he'd take her out which was another thing I didn't like. The way he looked at her wasn't the soft loving look I'd see our parent's sharing, it was more how someone would look at a prized possession like a sports car or something. It was like he saw Liz as something pretty he wanted to own.

They'd been dating for most of the summer when I finally voiced that opinion to her. She thought it was just because I was jealous as she'd been spending all her time with him instead of me and told me to grown up. I tried to argue that although I did miss spending time with her that wasn't why I disliked Ed so much. By then it wasn't just a feeling I got from him but the changes he'd caused in Liz that were worrying me. She spent all of her free time with him to the extent that she never saw her friends anymore which I was pretty sure was the result of a conversation I'd overheard them having where he commented that he thought they were bad influences that just distracted her from the important things in life. What he thought those were I don't know but he seemed to put me in the same category as her friends as she wouldn't play with me because he'd said she should be spending her time doing more constructive things. Again, I never heard what those where.

I tried going to Mum and Dad about it when she wouldn't listen to me but they just thought she was growing up and that the changes in her were perfectly normal. They saw the same things in Ed as Liz did and thought she'd done well to catch his eye. He was so good at manipulating people and I seemed to be the only one who could see through him. To me he was controlling, uncaring and conniving. If he wanted something he always seemed to find a way to get it and Liz was one of those things.

She was so happy when she was with him, hung on every word he said, gushed over the things he'd achieved. He was top of his year at school, accepted into all the best universities and he had their whole lives planned out. She was so wrapped up in this world he'd created that she couldn't see what he'd really done. When he went away to university at the end of the summer I hoped that would be the end of them but they continued with a long distance relationship. I was sure with him not around constantly she'd finally see what he'd done to her but she didn't.

With trying to keep up with him she'd fallen out with most of her friends after she'd dropped them too many times on Ed's orders and she wouldn't spend time with me so all she did when he wasn't there was study or pine after him. I kept trying to convince her he was no good for her, that she shouldn't pull away from everyone else but she wouldn't listen, kept saying I was too young to understand and that when I was older I'd fall in love and see that she was right. I couldn't help feeling that if it was love she shouldn't have had to change so much. He should have taken her as she was, the bright, ambitious friendly Liz and not mould her into the obedient, docile shell of herself who would do nothing without his approval.

Our dad died when I was twelve and it tore our family apart. Mum was devastated and I was too young to be of any real help to her. Liz was eighteen at this point but instead of being there to help our mum she ran straight to Ed. She moved in with him almost straight away and hardly ever came back to visit us. They married a year later. I was meant to be her bridesmaid but we got into a huge argument the night before the wedding as I didn't want to see her marry him so knowing it would be the last chance I'd get, I'd tried to point out all the things I'd noticed over the years.

She exploded, screamed at me for not supporting her and wanting her to be miserable. Said she needed him to live, that he was everything to her, that he loved her and only wanted the best for her then told me to leave. I went back to Mum in tears, I was only thirteen. Liz banned me from the wedding, wouldn't hear a word Mum had to say about it so I was left at home while she signed her life away to him.

She'd always had ambitions, wanted a career although she hadn't been sure in what and never got the chance to figure it out as Ed didn't want a working wife. Within a year she was pregnant with Emmett and was a full time stay at home mum. She still wouldn't see or talk to me and she'd stopped visiting the house completely, just staying in touch with Mum by phone. Mum would tell me how she was doing, so I knew when you were all born and she sent Mum photos which I got to see but that was it, and she didn't even know Mum was passing the information on to me. If she had I'm sure she would have cut all contact with Mum as well.

I met Carlisle for the first time when we were seventeen. He was visiting his Uncle and I ran into him at Garrett's shop, although it was his father's then. We clicked instantly and spent every free minute we had together that summer until he had to go home. When he left we stayed in contact and when he came back the next summer we picked up right where we left off. I remembered what Liz had said about how I'd understand when I fell in love but I didn't. I'd known I was in love with Carlisle after the very first week of meeting him but it didn't change me and he'd never have asked that of me. I knew I'd been right all along and I'd wished Liz could see us so she'd see what I did but she still wouldn't even accept a phone call from me.

Mum died halfway through that summer and I thought there'd be chance to work things out with Liz as she was the only family I had left. Of course, I got to the funeral and she wouldn't even look at me. Ed kept his arm around her for the whole day, not even giving me a chance to try and talk to her but I got to see you guys even if it was briefly. Carlisle came with me to the funeral and he could see the same things I'd always seen. The way your dad held your mum was not loving, there was a possessiveness to it and he spent more time that day glaring at me then he did looking after his wife.

When we left the funeral I was totally devastated. I'd lost both my parents and my sister wanted nothing to do with me. Carlisle asked me to go with him when he had to return to America at the end of the summer and I agreed as there was nothing left for me to be leaving behind and I loved him.

Before we left I visited Liz. I made sure Ed wasn't there before I knocked on her door. I wanted one last chance to get my sister back and surprisingly she let me in when she found me on her doorstep. She was quiet and sad that day, and when I pleaded with her to leave Ed and come with us she didn't scream at me like I'd expected and had instead just shook her head and claimed I still didn't understand. I told her all about Carlisle and how we felt about each other, determined to make her see that I knew what I was saying, that I wasn't just a little kid anymore and that I maybe knew even better than she did.

Ed appeared just as I'd got to the point of telling her how manipulative he had been, isolating her from her friends and family, forcing her to leave her studies in place of starting a family. He was furious, called me a poisonous little liar who had always been jealous and just wanted to ruin the happiness of her sister. He threw me out and she just stood by and watched him do it. That was the last time I saw them.

We didn't return from America until a couple of years ago and I had no idea anything might be wrong with your family until a few months ago when a young man turned up on our doorstep asking for you. When I told him you'd never even visited me and that I had no idea where you were he said your parent's had told him you'd come to stay with me when we were back in America. I've no idea how he could even have found us considering your mum never had an address for me and it made me wonder why they'd tell him to come to me in the first place. We tried to get in touch after that but the address and phone number I had for your mum were no use and when I found your dad's firm he wouldn't talk.

We'd reached a dead end until Garrett called Carlisle and he saw you. He recognized your surname straight away but he didn't want to say anything until he knew for sure. Then when you were admitted to hospital and he met Emmett and Alice there was no doubt that you were family and I had to come. We still don't know what's happened between you and your parent's but you need to know that if we had known, we would have taken you in." There were tears in her eyes as she finished speaking and Carlisle quickly left his chair to sit on the arm of hers to comfort her. He knew how much it tortured her to think about her sister and it was even worse now with what had happened to Edward.

She'd always felt like she'd failed Elizabeth by not being able to convince her that her love for Ed wasn't healthy as she'd always felt it would end in trouble which Edward was now living proof of. Edward Senior was a poisonous man who didn't care for anyone else's happiness so long as he could get to where he wanted in life which he had. Liz's inheritance from their parents had funded his schooling to become a lawyer, his image as a young family man had helped him secure his first position at a law firm and propel him through promotions. The respect and envy his portrayal of being a hard working man who managed to remain loyal to his beautiful family had also helped him garner the perfect reputation within their high class circles allowing him to make friends in all the right places. All of that together was what had made it possible for him to now own his own law firm and he'd have had none of it if he hadn't succeeding in making Elizabeth fall in love with him. Elizabeth meanwhile had never followed her own dreams, had given up a child and lost half her family and all her friends. Esme couldn't see how Ed could ever have been worth that.

Edward didn't know what to say. It was a lot to take in but the fact he wasn't the only one his parent's had ostracized from the family was strangely comforting. He could see some of what Esme had described in his father. He always had been extremely controlling, nothing had ever happened in their household without his say so. They'd had to appear like the perfect family to everyone else; successful lawyer husband, doting mother, children top of their classes at school with perfect behaviour. It had always been exhausting trying to live up to the high expectations of his father but he'd always wanted to make him proud. Instead all he'd ever seemed to do was disappoint him and there had never been any praise for the times they did manage to meet his impossible goals, just punishments when they failed.

"Garrett doesn't know any of this?" He finally asked still finding it a little farfetched that this had all taken so long to come out. If Carlisle had recognised him so easily then how had Garrett failed to notice in three years? Surely he'd have known about Esme's family considering she met Carlisle while he was staying with him.

"No, he hasn't got any idea. We didn't think it would be right to tell him before you knew." Carlisle answered calmly. He knew his cousin would kick himself when they told him but he hadn't been looking for Edward, as far as he'd known Carlisle's niece and nephews were all happily at home with their parents so there would have been no reason for him to even think about the possibility. The only reason Carlisle had made the connection was they'd already been looking for him at that point with the idea planted that something was wrong otherwise he may have just thought the name and eyes were a coincidence himself.

"I've been working there for three years. How have we not run into each other before?"

"We haven't really visited the shop that often and when we have it's been at weekends which I assume you don't usually work." Carlisle responded thinking that if he'd just made the effort to visit his cousin a little more often than they could have helped Edward a lot sooner and maybe avoided what had been happening recently. It was a sad twist of fate that had lead to them being so close and yet having no idea that anything had been wrong. Sometimes life really could be cruel.

Edward nodded thinking that was an acceptable explanation and relieved that Garrett and not been lying to him but now it left him wondering what would happen now.

"So what now? Why are you here?" He asked. He did not want to get the wrong idea and end up hurt. He wanted to know exactly what they wanted and expected. Too many things were going on right now, the majority of them making it feel like his life was crashing down around him. He didn't want anything else to add to that.

"We want to help and we'd like to know what happened. You're family and if your parents are too stupid to realise what they've given up then I'd like the chance to get to know you. I couldn't be in your life before because of them but I would have loved to have been there." Esme stated and Edward could hear in her voice and see in the pleading look in her eyes that she really meant that.

"What do you want to know?" He asked quietly very aware that his daughter was on his knee and most of what they'd probably want to hear could not be said in front of her.

"How did you end up here? What did your parents do?" She asked only to be met with silence as he looked down at Lucy and played with her hair. Emmett could see the problem straight away and although he wanted to hear what Edward would say he knew he couldn't say anything with Lucy in the room. Edward needed family around him more than either he or Alice needed to hear what would be said so they were going to have to wait to hear what would go on.

"Lucy, why don't we go and get some ice cream for later? Auntie Alice can come too." He suggested while standing up and giving Alice a pointed look. He knew she'd want to stay but it would be easier for Edward if they were all gone. She got the message and stood as well while Lucy looked up at Edward. She didn't want to go anywhere but Edward smiled slightly to her and kissed her forehead.

"Go on, if you don't Uncle Emmett will pick a horrible flavour."

"I don't want to go." She returned, burying her face into his chest and grabbing hold of his t-shirt. She'd been waiting so long for him to be home that she didn't want to leave him at all now he was.

"You'll have fun I'm sure and I'll be fine here with Carlisle and Esme." He tried to assure her but she just shook her head. Although Esme seemed nice she didn't know her and hadn't really understood most of what had just been said so she didn't trust her with her daddy yet.

"How about if we go to Hamleys while we're out?" Emmett suggested and it did make Lucy lift her head away from Edward as she looked to him instead, her interest obviously caught by the toy shop.

"Can we look at all the dolls?" She asked so Emmett smiled and nodded.

"Of course we can if you go and get your shoes and coat on now." He commented so with one more look to Edward and a kiss to his cheek she scrambled down off the sofa and headed for her room.

"Thanks for that." Edward said as soon as she was gone. He would rather Esme and Carlisle found out what had happened then than wait. Once they knew they could change their minds and want to leave and if that was going to happen it would be better if he hadn't got to know them more.

"Don't worry about it. I'll try to keep her out for an hour, give you guys plenty of time to talk." He replied then within five minutes he, Alice and Lucy were all gone leaving Edward, Carlisle and Esme scattered around the living room in an awkward silence. They didn't want to push him and he never liked thinking about the night he'd found out about Lucy but if he wanted to be sure of them, they needed to know so he forced himself to start talking.

They listened without interrupting as he told them all about the night Lucy's mother turned up at his parents' house and the days that followed it. Once he got past the initial difficulty of sorting himself out and working out how to look after Lucy there really wasn't much to tell. He had been leading a very quiet, uneventful life up until recently. All he'd really done was get through enough school to make finding a decent job easier, started working for Garrett and looked after Lucy.

It didn't escape Carlisle or Esme's notice that while he was speaking his voice sounded bland, like he'd detached himself from his memories and while he told them about that first night in detail the rest of what he said was vague and the majority of it concentrated on Lucy. He only told them the basics of what he had been doing and there was nothing said at all about his feelings on anything.

By the time he'd finished talking Esme couldn't hold herself back any longer and had moved across to join him on the sofa before pulling him into a hug which stunned him at first but he soon relaxed into it.

"I'm so sorry we weren't there. If you ever need anything again, whether it's just someone to talk to, a place to go or money then you can come to us and we won't ever turn you away." She said as she continued to hold him as he seemed to be relishing the comfort which she guessed wasn't surprising considering how little comfort he'd had over the last few years.

Edward finally pulled out of the hug to try and gauge what Carlisle's reaction to his story would be and found him staring at him with a look of uneasy confusion. There were a lot of holes in what he'd said and the gaps left Carlisle wondering what he would by hiding and why. The most noticeable one was currently the most important one too. He hadn't said anything at all about how he'd come to be covered in bruises multiple times.

"What about recently? The bruises and hospital visit? Where did they come from?" He asked when he realised he had Edward's attention. He saw Edward's posture stiffen at his questions before he shrugged and made a visible effort to relax himself again.

"If you're in trouble with someone you need to tell us. We could help you." He tried to persuade him to speak. He could remember Garrett had wondered if it was to do with money and that was something they had plenty of so it would be easy to fix if he would just talk to them. Edward however shook his head before running a hand through his hair and tugging at it slightly.

"You can't help with that." He muttered knowing it was admitting there was something going on but he could tell neither Carlisle nor Esme would let him get away with brushing it off as nothing. It had already gone too far for that.

"If you told us what was going on then maybe we could." Carlisle tried again.

"If I told you, they'd hurt Lucy and I don't even know anything worth telling anyway." Edward explained grudgingly. He didn't want to lie to them but he really couldn't risk James turning his attention to Lucy. Unfortunately that didn't make Carlisle drop the subject, if anything it seemed to rile him. It was bad enough that Edward was being attacked but to hear they'd threatened a five year old girl was too much.

"None of us would ever let them hurt Lucy and them hurting you hurts her anyway. What happens if the next time is worse? You need to tell us what's going on before it's too late." It was already serious for Edward and Carlisle did not want to see what they'd do to him next if he continued to just ignore it. Something needed to be done by someone to stop it.

"There might not be a next time and I can't take the risk. I will not do anything that could put her in danger." Edward argued as although he doubted that he'd seen the last of James he just couldn't risk it. It didn't matter if Lucy was with someone twenty four seven, he was sure James would find a way to get to her if he wanted to. He didn't strike Edward as the easily deterred type.

"Might not be isn't good enough. You know how weak your body is right now Edward. You can't take another beating."

"I can't tell you anything." Edward countered, ignoring Carlisle's comments. It didn't matter what Carlisle said, he just couldn't do it. They could do what they liked to him but there was no way he could stand to see Lucy hurt. He'd cope, he always did.

Seeing Carlisle about to argue again Esme caught his eye and shook her head slightly. It was doing no good as Edward was proving to be as stubborn as his parents' and all Carlisle's arguing was doing was upsetting him. She knew they needed to know whatever Edward did about who was hurting him but it would have to wait as stressing him out would not help anything and would only end in him chucking them out. They needed to get closer to him, not make him want to shut them out completely.

"Ok, you can't tell us that then but what about Lucy's mother? What happened to her?" Carlisle switched subjects, turning to something else that had bothered him about Edward's story. It seemed a little strange that Edward knew nothing about the pregnancy and the mother then waited five months after the birth before abandoning Lucy. She would have been young, but to just abandon her with very little explanation seemed strange. Surely she would have formed some kind of attachment to the child if she'd kept her that long and he would have expected her to try and make some kind of contact even if not straight away. Something about the entire thing just felt wrong.

"I have no idea. We haven't heard from her since." Edward shrugged feeling really uncomfortable with the questions turning to her. He was quite content pretending she never even existed and he didn't see why Carlisle would think she mattered now. Even if he had known her, he wouldn't have wanted her around Lucy after she abandoned her the way she had. Lucy didn't need her, she was happy as they were. Where she was shouldn't have mattered to Carlisle and Edward didn't like his interest in it.

"Not even from friends or people you both knew?"

"I didn't know her. I don't know who she was friends and I haven't even seen any of my friends until very recently."

"You don't know her yet you had a child with her?" Something definitely didn't add up. Carlisle hadn't known Edward long but from what he'd seen and what Garrett had told him that didn't seem in character for him. Either he'd changed considerably or there was something more to what had happened.

"Yes, I don't remember how that happened and if you don't believe that you can leave right now. I've had enough of being called a liar by my dad." Edward grumbled, his hands running back through his hair as he glared at Carlisle.

"I believe you, I just don't understand it. You remember nothing of it?"

"No, it was at a party. I assume I got drunk." Edward answered shortly. He didn't see why it was so important. It was in the past and as far as he was concerned it could stay there. It certainly didn't need dragging up and going over in minute detail.

"And you remember nothing at all?"

"No. I remember going to the party and talking to a few people then nothing until I woke up in my own bed with a hangover the following morning."

"You don't even remember drinking? How did you get home?"

"No but I was fourteen and I didn't normally drink so it probably wouldn't have taken many and I don't know how I got home, I guess Emmett got me home somehow. I never asked." Carlisle really didn't like what he was hearing but Esme was shooting him death glares as he continued to push an obviously agitated Edward so he relented.

"Ok I'm sorry, it's just a little odd."

"Well none of it matters now anyway." Edward shrugged. His chest was starting to feel tight again and dragging up the past was making him feel sick. He really did not like thinking about any of it so he was glad Carlisle seemed to be giving in as he didn't want to end up yelling at the man who'd done nothing but try to help him so far. As it was he felt twitchy and on the verge of snapping. He wished Lucy was there to make him relax.

"Just ignore Carlisle, he's too curious for his own good sometimes. Why don't you tell us some more about Lucy, what's her favourite thing to do?" Esme tried to calm things down a little as she wasn't even sure if Edward had realised it but as Carlisle had asked his questions he'd started to fidget more while his expressions had closed down and although he said he didn't remember anything there was something in the set of his face that suggested there was something there even if he didn't recognise it himself. Whatever it was he obviously didn't like to think about it and dragging it all up was doing nothing but aggravating him which not only made it highly likely he wouldn't trust Carlisle but also seemed to be affecting his health as he'd started to rub at his chest like it was bothering him.

The change of topic seemed to do some good though as he told her all about Lucy's likes and dislikes and by the time Emmett, Alice and Lucy came home Edward looked perfectly happy talking to Esme who was still sitting next to him on the sofa and holding one his hands between both of hers.

Carlisle had to leave then as he had to get to work but before he left he made sure Emmett was keeping track of Edward's medication and not letting him try and get by without it before he was ready as he still seemed to prefer trying to ignore that anything was wrong. Esme decided to stay for the rest of the day, declaring that Carlisle would pick her up once his shift was over. She wanted to spend as much time as she could around her family. They had a lot of missed years to catch up on and she wanted to know everything about her nephews and niece. There was also a lot to learn about Lucy who took to her instantly in the more relaxed atmosphere and cheerfully chatted away to her for a while about her favourite toys and games she liked to play. Esme soaked up all the new information hoping she would remember it all for future use as she had every intention to spoil both Lucy and Edward.

As everyone else chatted, Edward sat back and listened. He'd stopped contributing soon after everyone had arrived home and was content letting Lucy and Alice take control of the conversation. He still felt slightly out of sorts after Carlisle's questioning and he couldn't quite figure out what was wrong. He never had liked thinking about that time in his life and that had been the first time anyone had really pushed him on it. The anger that had flared up towards Carlisle had faded quickly once he'd stopped asking questions but Edward still felt edgy. He'd tried letting Lucy's happy chatter lull him but it didn't seem to be helping this time.

Too caught up in trying to pin down what had upset him so much, he failed to notice when the conversation around him died down and it wasn't until Emmett held a glass of water and a handful of pills out in front of his face that he realised everyone else had left the room.

"You ok? You looked miles away." Emmett commented as he took the glass and pills. Edward nodded in response before taking the pills while Emmett watched him.

"Are you sure? It's a lot to take in, suddenly acquiring an Aunt and Uncle."

"I'm fine. Where is everyone?" He was tired, grumpy and definitely not in the mood for trying to talk to his brother.

"In the kitchen. Esme offered to cook, Lucy wanted to help and Alice is quizzing Esme on what America is like." Emmett answered and didn't miss the slight scowl mentioning cooking earned. Edward was starting to feel like taking a nap would be a really good idea but he knew if they were cooking they weren't likely to let him sleep until after they'd eaten.

"What are they making?" He asked, resigned to the fact he'd most likely not get away with just playing with his food with Esme there. From just the afternoon spent with her it was fairly obvious she had a strong maternal streak which she seemed to be directing at them. It made him wonder why her and Carlisle didn't have children of their own as none had been mentioned and considering they'd bared all on the past he figured she'd have mentioned it if they had any cousins. Given he'd had enough of talking for one day and he was too tired to be overly curious he'd leave that question for another day. It sounded like there would be plenty of opportunities for talking if Esme had her way.

"Some kind of chicken pie I think. Lucy was helping to roll out pastry anyway."

Edward ended up being glad he hadn't fallen asleep and missed dinner. Esme was obviously a very good cook and Lucy was beaming with so much pride at the fact she'd helped to make it that Edward found himself smiling and for once digging into his meal without playing with it or prompts from Lucy. No one commented on the fact he cleared most of his plate but he'd felt them all watching him as they ate. Alice had continued to question Esme throughout dinner and they discovered she'd attended university while in America and she'd studied business before getting into interior design once she'd graduated. She now owned her own interior design business which she'd managed to relocate with them when they'd decided to move. This seemed to spark Alice's interest and by the end of dinner she'd managed to talk Esme into letting her do work experience with her.

Edward found the whole dinner experience rather odd. He was so used to it being just him and Lucy that their now overcrowded little table seemed alien to him. It was kind of like being over at Bella's house and it made him wonder what she'd make of Esme. They seemed to have a shared interest in cooking if the quality of the pie was anything to go by and as Bella had managed to get along with both Emmett and Alice he figured she'd probably like Esme too. He hoped she would as he liked having Bella around and he thought he'd probably enjoy having Esme around as well so long as Carlisle didn't continue to ask awkward questions anyway.

When dinner was finished Edward gave in to his exhaustion and announced he was going to bed. He'd have liked to have stayed up a little longer for Lucy but the way she had been looking at him after he'd finished eating suggested she was going to try sending him to bed anyway. She hugged and kissed him goodnight before roping Alice into playing dolls with her for a little longer while Emmett washed up so when Edward fell into bed it was just Esme who had followed him to make sure he was ok.

As soon as he laid down he was struck with a nasty coughing fit so Esme helped him rearrange his pillows to prop him up in an attempt to ease it. He closed his eyes as he tried to sink into the pillows and ignore the pain that flared through his ribs and chest while he felt the bed dip as Esme sat down beside him.

"You should be proud of yourself you know? Lucy is such a wonderful little girl and that's all down to you. There's nothing I can do about your parent's but you need to know that it's them that are the disgrace in this family, not you. You are a hundred times the man your father could only ever hope to be. I can't even imagine how hard the last few years have been for you, but you're not on your own anymore so you don't have to worry about anything right now other than getting better." She told him quietly as she could see he was already falling asleep and didn't want to disturb him too much.

"I'll leave you to sleep but I'll pop in tomorrow. Emmett said that the Bella everyone's told me such wonderful things about might be visiting and I'd like to meet her. Sleep well." She stroked the hair that had fallen over his closed eyes back so she could lightly kiss his forehead before she stood and left the room. Edward was fast asleep before the door had even closed.

Esme was so glad that Carlisle had found him and what she'd said to him was true, she couldn't do anything about his parent's but that wouldn't stop her from going round and giving them a piece of her mind once things had settled a little as she didn't want to cause any problems for Emmett and Alice but she didn't want to let them get away with what they'd done to Edward either. She was determined she'd find a way to set things right. If she had her way that would mean bringing Edward Senior's perfect little world crashing down around him. He hated anything that was out of his control and Esme had always been one of those things. If he'd told everyone Edward had gone to stay with her then all she'd have to do was set the record straight. He wouldn't be so perfect if everyone knew he'd abandoned his son and granddaughter when they'd needed him most but she knew Edward would not like being the subject of the gossip that would cause so she'd have to find some other way. One way or another she would make him pay for what he'd done.


	25. Chapter 23 Hopeful Pessimistic

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

AN - A slightly shorter chapter this time I'm afraid but it felt right to end it where it was. My boyfriend got a job this week so hopefully I'll get a little more time to write now as he won't be trying to persuade me to log in to final fantasy XI the instant I get home from work every day anymore. That being said...the next couple of weeks might be a bit hit and miss as I have an unlimited card for the cinema so will most likely be spending a lot of time watching Breaking Dawn.

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><p><strong>Chapter 23 Hopeful Pessimistic<strong>

Edward woke to a silent flat. He was groggy and everything ached again but his morning coughing fit wasn't quite as bad as he'd grown to expect. The clock told him he'd slept right through the night and Lucy leaving for school. He was certain she'd slept in his bed again though as her favourite teddy bear, Cuddles, was lying in the spot next to him that Lucy would normally occupy. Since he'd already missed Lucy leaving and there was nothing else to do he pulled the bear into his arms, inhaling Lucy's scent from it as he closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep.

The next time he woke up it was to someone shaking him and calling his name. When his eyes snapped open it was to see a concerned Emmett hovering over him.

"Are you ok? I think you were having a nightmare." Emmett asked as Edward fought his way out of the covers that had tangled around him in his sleep. He'd been dreaming of the night he got Lucy. Talking about it so much the day before had left it wide open in his head and with Lucy gone from his arms the familiar nightmare had been free to reappear. The fear and despair was always the same no matter how many times he dreamt it or the fact he knew it all ended ok. One thing was for sure, he wouldn't be sleeping again in a hurry.

"It was nothing. How was Lucy this morning?" He asked deflecting Emmett's concern.

"We had a bit of a fight getting her to leave but she was ok once she met Anna and Bella at the gates." He answered dropping down to take a seat on the end of Edward's bed. "Oh and Bella said she'd be round tonight as soon as Renee gets home to take over with Anna."

Edward had guessed Emmett would have trouble getting Lucy to leave for school to begin with as he knew she wouldn't want to leave him while he was unwell and she'd been clingy when he was hurt before so he wasn't too concerned about that. She'd settle down soon enough when she saw he was fine at home and he'd just have to make sure there were plenty of hugs once she got home which wouldn't be a problem considering he loved them as much as she did.

The news that Bella was coming around later and without Anna however was surprising. When she'd suggested visiting it hadn't occurred to him that she hadn't intended to bring Anna with her so her and Lucy could play. So far every meeting they'd had had been for the girls and even when she'd visited him in hospital that had been to bring Lucy in. This would be the first time they'd be spending time together purely for the sake of it and as he thought about it, it made him nervous. Part of him was overjoyed that she'd thought of it and was excited to see her but the rest of him was terrified and he wasn't entirely sure why.

He knew he could trust Bella and he had trusted her allowing her to take care of Lucy for him so her visiting to spend time with him shouldn't have bothered him. He liked her company, she was funny and easy to talk to and she never seemed to judge him even though there were plenty of things in his life to look down on him for. On top of that she seemed to genuinely care for Lucy which he knew would be a rare trait to find in girls his age and as he thought it he realised that was one of the reasons her visiting scared him. He wasn't looking at her from the point of view of friends, he was jumping straight to comparing her against the things he'd need from someone to consider something more and she was checking every box. That would have been fine if there was any way she could ever want the same thing but he knew she wouldn't. He wasn't worth her time and he was lucky she was even wasting it on visiting him. As he'd said to Alice before, he had nothing to offer anyone, even less so now his body had collapsed around him. He was a pathetic excuse for a man and Bella deserved so much better.

So it wasn't Bella he was scared of, it was how he felt about her and there wasn't a lot he could do about it. He didn't have the strength of will to push her away anymore as during her visits to the hospital with Lucy her presence had become addictive to him. She always found a way to cheer him up and she seemed to understand when something was getting to him and his grumpiness hadn't offended her. Even now he was looking forward to getting to spend a couple of hours with her despite the fact it would only make things worse in the long run. He was growing attached, something he had tried so hard to prevent but it was too late. There was no stopping it now, he just had to hope she wouldn't notice as he didn't think he'd be able to take that embarrassment.

Emmett watched his brother get lost in his thoughts after he mentioned Bella. He'd been expecting Edward to quiz him more on Lucy but he appeared to be distracted and he wasn't sure that was a good thing by the slight frown that crossed his face. Emmett had noticed the way Edward was with Bella, how easily he seemed to interact with her while he kept everyone else at a distance. It was obvious really that he liked the girl and Emmett couldn't blame him. She was beautiful, brilliant with Lucy and seemed to have a better handle on understanding Edward than any of them other than Lucy. He was pretty sure she felt something for Edward too. The way she'd stood up for him and argued with them in the hospital had showed her protective streak and there'd never been a doubt about her taking care of Lucy. Lucy loved Bella as well so Emmett couldn't help but feel the whole thing would be pretty perfect if they got together.

From the look on Edward's face as he got lost in his thoughts however Emmett doubted anything would be easy. He didn't know if Edward didn't realise how he felt or if he was trying to ignore it like everything else. Either way it appeared Edward would be making life harder for himself than he had to again and it made Emmett wonder if they ought to intervene. If he missed out on whatever he and Bella could have because of some stupid misguided reason then they'd all be letting him down again but Emmett knew Edward would hate them getting involved.

He'd never tried to talk to Edward about girls before which was probably just another way he'd let his brother down as he was pretty sure it was in the job description of being a big brother somewhere so maybe it was time to rectify that but he didn't even know where to start and if Edward wasn't owning up to what he was feeling he would probably just make everything even more awkward than it already was. Being subtle and sensitive was not Emmett's strong point and he knew that so erring on the side of caution for once he decided to leave it and wait and see what would happen when Bella arrived. Maybe Esme would have some insight into it once she'd seen the pair of them together, he knew what they'd already told her about Bella had intrigued her.

"So, would you like some breakfast?" He finally asked to pull Edward out of his thoughts. Edward responded with a shrug which Emmett took as a yes so he left him in piece to get up while he went and got the coffee ready.

They spent the rest of the day with Edward laid out on the sofa flicking through TV channels and driving Emmett up the wall with his fidgeting. He seemed to be feeling a little better as there hadn't been so many coughing fits or winces so the pain killers and antibiotics appeared to be doing their job. The fidgeting was entirely down to boredom and nerves.

Edward wasn't used to spending his days doing nothing but Emmett was insistent that he was still to rest which left him very little options on what he could do. Being stuck with daytime TV it left his mind free to wander and it had been stuck on Bella for most of the afternoon which only hyped his nervousness. Emmett had asked him if he wanted to talk about anything when the constant channel flicking had got too much but Edward had just shook his head. He didn't want to admit what was making him nervous in case Emmett made it into a big deal and it really wasn't. He liked someone he had no place liking and he didn't want to tell Emmett for him to make it all worse. It was better if he kept it to himself and tried to pretend it wasn't there, it would save both Bella and himself a lot of needless embarrassment.

Thankfully Esme turned up before Emmett snapped and tried to talk to Edward again who was still channel hopping and drumming his fingers against his leg. He happily vanished into the kitchen for a while leaving Esme to sit on the arm of the sofa Edward was resting his head against so she could stroke a hand through his hair.

"How are you doing today honey?" She asked, glancing at the TV to see he'd finally settled on a cookery show.

"Bored." Edward complained as he leant in to her hand. It felt nice.

"Well that's probably a good sign, means you're getting better." She commented looking down at him with a smile.

"Can't wait for Lucy to be home." He mumbled while closing his eyes, letting the feel of her playing with his hair finally relax him after his nervous energy filled day.

"Only another hour till school finishes and you've got a visit from Bella to look forward to as well."

"What do you know about Bella?" Edward's eyes snapped open at the sound of her name and he could vaguely recall her mentioning Bella the night before as well but he'd been too far gone to sleep at the time to really notice. Now, having had his thoughts on Bella all day he wondered just what everyone had told Esme about her.

"Just that she's a lovely girl who Lucy adores and can apparently make you smile." She answered, smile still in place and Edward relaxed, reassured that most of her knowledge had probably come from Lucy. He'd been worried for a moment that his feelings had been more obvious than he'd thought and Emmett and Alice had been gossiping.

"She's a good friend and great with Lucy." He mumbled letting his eyes fall closed again.

"So I hear, I'm looking forward to meeting her." Esme added then seeing how relaxed playing with his hair was making him she settled down, leaning against the back of the sofa so she could see the TV better and continue to run her hand through his hair.

"Where's Carlisle?"

"He's working today. I finished up early so I could come see how you were doing."

"You didn't have to do that."

"I know but I wanted to. How are you feeling aches and pains wise?"

"Not too bad, they're still there but they're getting easier to manage."

"That's good, Carlisle will be glad to hear that. Are you tired?" She asked noticing that he seemed to be drifting off and wondering if she was keeping him awake by talking when he'd rather be asleep.

"I guess."

"Have a nap for a while until Lucy's home then. I'll still be here." She commented and the comforting feeling of her playing with his hair was enough for him to forget about his fear of the nightmare he'd had that morning and fall asleep.

He awoke to find himself in Esme's arms with damp cheeks and gasping breaths. They were still on the sofa only now Esme had slid down onto the seat so that his upper body was propped against her, his head held to her chest as she tried to sooth him.

"I'm sorry." He muttered trying to pull away and wipe at his eyes only for Esme to tighten her hold, not letting him move at all.

"Shh...you've got nothing to be sorry for. Everyone has nightmares sometimes." She soothed, "Emmett's out picking Lucy up so let's just get you calmed down for when she's home."

Deciding to take the comfort when it was being offered Edward relaxed a little and let her sooth away the dregs of his nightmares. It had been the same one from that morning to begin with but at the point where he'd usually wake up or it would dwindle into more pleasant dreams it had switched to the one of James. He'd though that one would have left him now the event it had been warning against had happened but it appeared to be just like James, persistent.

By the time Lucy charged through the door and straight into Edward's arms Esme had managed to help him calm down enough that with a splash of cold water to his face to hide the evidence of his tears there was nothing to indicate anything had been wrong.

"I didn't want to leave you this morning but Uncle Emmett said I had to go to school so I left you Cuddles so he'd take care of you. Bella said she was coming over tonight and Anna was being grumpy today, so I bet Bella will be glad to come here. I've got reading homework and I got a gold star on my maths today." Lucy rattled off as she hugged Edward as tightly as she could. He managed to get her to ease her hold a little to stop his ribs protesting too much but did nothing to halt her monologue knowing it would be pointless to try. She was obviously overly excited to be home but he couldn't blame her as he was glad to see her too.

"I missed you too Luce." He said when she finally stopped talking and she lifted her head away from where it had been buried in his chest to smile at him making any residual uneasiness from his nightmare disappear.

"I was talking too fast wasn't I?"

"Just a little sweetheart." He answered but he grinned crookedly at her so she giggled and cuddled back into him.

"What did you do today?" She asked once she'd settled down a little and had gotten comfortable on his knee.

"I slept and watched TV." He answered, "It was very boring."

"Awww but it makes you better right?"

"That it does so you don't need to worry about me baby. Uncle Emmett told me you didn't want to go to school this morning."

"Sorry Daddy." She mumbled trying to burrow back into his chest again but he stopped her by tipping her face up to meet him with a finger beneath her chin.

"You don't need to say sorry sweetheart. Just understand that I'm ok and you don't have to be worried about leaving me. I've got Uncle Emmett here looking after me." He tried to reassure her as although it wasn't a huge problem and he'd expected her to be a little reluctant to leave him he didn't want it to go unnoticed and fester into something worse. She shouldn't have to worry about anything, that was his job.

"Ok." She responded still a little doubtful but it satisfied Edward that she'd at least be trying not to worry. She was too much like him for her to let it go completely but at least she seemed to accept that Emmett would look after him.

The rest of the afternoon was spent watching TV, chatting to Esme and getting through Lucy's homework. She knew Bella would be visiting so didn't even grumble as she got out her reading book and it was over and done with without any tantrums. It really did look like her reading was improving a lot lately and it made Edward proud to see her doing so well.

Dinner ended up being nicely relaxed now that they'd got to know Esme a little and he was starting to get used to company so having a full kitchen table didn't seem so out of place to Edward anymore. All in all they'd managed to keep him totally distracted from his nerves until the knock at the door announced Bella's arrival shortly after they'd finished eating and had retreated to the living room.

"Wow you're looking a lot brighter! Being home's certainly doing you good." She said by way of greeting as she flopped down onto the sofa beside where Edward was sitting with Lucy on his knee. Emmett had let her in but he left them to it and headed into the kitchen to help Esme with the washing up she'd insisted on taking care of.

"Yeah, I'm feeling a lot better." Edward answered, "How have you been?"

"Good though I'm glad to be out of the house. Anna is driving me mad, Phil was meant to be home today but he got called away to a conference last minute."

"Ah Lucy said she was grumpy today. What does Phil do?"

"Urm he's a sales rep for a sporting equipment company. It's nothing wildly exciting but it's based on commissions which is why he has to travel so much and of course Mum spoils Anna to make up for it so now she thinks she can get anything through a tantrum."

"That's never very fun." He commented thinking back to his days at the crèche.

"Nope but never mind. I hear you had an exciting day yesterday?"

"Emmett's been gossiping then."

"Yup, him and Lucy."

"So you know Dr. Cullen is my Uncle?"

"And that you're related to Garrett. I'm looking forward to meeting Esme, she sounds fun." Bella responded. Emmett had relayed what had happened the day before with Lucy's input while they'd waited for the school bell to ring and she liked the sound of Esme. She was the first member of Edward's family other than Lucy that she hadn't heard bad things about and she was glad to hear there were some good adult influences in his family.

"I'm surprised she's not already introduced herself, I think she's in the kitchen. They've all been gossiping to her as well and she was looking forward to meeting you."

"My ears are burning," Esme interrupted their conversation as she returned to the living room and looked at everyone with a large smile. Lucy had told her plenty about Bella the day before but seeing the smile on Edward's face was all she really needed to know. "And you must be Bella. It's lovely to meet you, I'm Esme Cullen, Edward's Aunt."

"It's nice to meet you too." Bella commented, getting up to shake her hand only for Esme to pull her into a brief hug instead.

"You're just as beautiful as Lucy described and thank you for helping them when I couldn't." Esme said sincerely once she'd let go of Bella and could see her properly again. Her compliment made Bella blush as she sat back down which only made Edward smile more.

"Thank you and I was happy to be able to help, you don't need to thank me for that." She mumbled shyly. Esme was a lot more blunt than she'd been expecting and although Bella liked her, she wasn't entirely sure how to respond to her. A glance to Edward suggested she was doing ok though and she couldn't help but smile a little when she saw his smile.

Having seen enough to know what she had been told about Bella was true, Esme decided to leave them to it so excused herself back to the kitchen where Emmett was just finishing the washing up.

"Well she's exactly as everyone described her. I like her." She commented, catching Emmett's attention and deciding this would be the perfect chance to ask what she thought about Bella and Edward he left the washing up and turned to face her as she grabbed some of the dry plates to put away.

"I think Edward likes her." He blurted making Esme smile as she nodded.

"I think you're right. The way they were smiling at each other I think it's mutual as well."

"Yeah, but I don't think Edward realises it. Do you think we should say something?"

"Probably best not to. He'll realise it when he's ready to, and if you say anything before then all you'll do is mortify him."

"But what if he doesn't realise it? They could be really good together and I don't want to let him miss out on anything else."

"I'm sure he will, or Bella will say something eventually. I don't think either of them would thank you for getting involved. Just give them some time, if it's meant to be it'll happen. The last thing Edward needs right now is being pushed into something he's not ready for, he's got enough going on already."

"I guess. I hope they figure it out soon though." They'd both drifted over to the doorway as they spoke and with the conversation coming to an end they watched Edward, Bella and Lucy as they talked. They all looked so content together and there was no missing the way Bella and Edward looked at each other. There was a longing to both their gazes.

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><p>"Esme seems nice." Bella commented once Esme was back in the kitchen and they could hear plates being moved around.<p>

"Yeah, I like her and it's kind of nice to know she's family my dad can't just order away at any moment." Edward agreed and Lucy's huge grin showed she agreed as well.

"I should imagine it is. It's good to see you getting on with Emmett as well by the way."

"It's taking some getting used to but yeah it's good having him around even if he does get on my nerves."

"That's what siblings are for though. He mentioned you were getting bored of TV so I bought a couple of DVDs with me if you want to watch one?"

"Sounds good. I've had as much TV as I can take for one day and I'm not allowed to do anything else."

"Aww you'll be better soon. Enjoy the rest while you can." Bella commented as she reached for her bag that she'd dropped on the floor in front of them. While she was doing that Lucy kissed Edward's cheek before climbing out of his arms and down onto the floor.

"Where you going baby?" He asked a little confused as she glanced to Bella before looking back at him and smiling widely.

"To find Uncle Emmett. It's bath time." She announced.

"Is it?" Looking at the clock that sat on the wall above the TV confirmed that it wasn't Lucy's bath time at all, it was an hour early at least. Lucy however nodded.

"Yup." She responded brightly before she hugged Bella and skipped off to the kitchen. Not only was that a very abrupt exit for Lucy, it was also the first time she had asked for Emmett's help over his. He tried not be hurt over it as he knew she'd taken to heart the instructions that he was to do nothing but rest and it would have ended up hurting his ribs but it was still unusual.

"Ok that was weird." He commented out loud but when he looked to Bella she was smiling a little.

"She probably just wants to soak him. You could have warned me about that by the way, can't say I'd been expecting a five year old who wouldn't want to get out of a bath." She said lightly and the small grin let Edward know she wasn't being serious.

"I'm sorry, I would have warned you if I'd been slightly more aware of what was going on." He answered feeling the need to apologise even though she hadn't been serious as it would have been nicer if he'd warned her of Lucy's love to splash water everywhere, "And you're probably right about her wanting to soak Emmett."

He also couldn't help but think it was part of Lucy's match making plan as well but he left that unsaid as Bella finally found the DVD she was looking for in her bag. It appeared she hadn't bothered to empty it of her college work which was making finding anything in it virtually impossible. He was thankful she'd thought to bring DVDs with her as he really hadn't wanted to watch anymore terrible TV shows and as she set it playing he was even more thankful when he realised it wasn't a kids film and was in fact Back To The Future.

"I haven't seen this in ages." He commented happily and when Bella rejoined him on the sofa she was pleased to see his smile firmly in place at her choice.

"Yeah I thought you might appreciate something that wasn't an animated kids film. It's the full box set." She said and he found he really wanted to hug her. She was so thoughtful even with stupid things that most people wouldn't notice. Emmett, Lucy and Esme chose that moment however to leave the kitchen and interrupt them once more. Edward wasn't sure whether he was annoyed or relieved.

"I'm heading off now honey. I'll try and pop in again tomorrow and if Carlisle's around I'll bring him too." Esme said as she leant down to hug Edward before taking a step back so she could see both him and Bella. "And as I said before it was lovely to meet you Bella, I hope I'll see you again soon."

"I'm sure you will Mrs. Cullen." Bella responded shyly.

"It's Esme dear, no need for formalities with me." She chastised never having been a fan of anything formal. She'd follow it where it was needed, but around family and friends she preferred to relax. Bella just nodded and smiled slightly so Esme took that for agreement and looked back to Edward. He looked so much better than when she'd first seen him in hospital and he even looked better than he had just that afternoon. She wondered if he realised how close he and Bella were sitting, there was barely a gap between them yet they were managing to keep enough distance so as not to touch. The day they both lost whatever the hesitance was that separated them was going to be a very happy day for everyone.

"You take care of yourself. No over doing it now you're starting to feel a little better." She warned Edward not wanting to see any regression the next time she visited.

"I will and I doubt Emmett or Lucy will let me do anything at all anyway. Thanks for coming over." Edward responded making a move to stand up to show her out but she shook her head at him with a smile.

"Stay where you are. I know where the door is. Have fun and I'll see you soon." She said and with a final chorus of goodbyes she was gone. Emmett and Lucy also left for the bathroom and they heard Lucy's giggles and Emmett's first complaint of being splashed before Bella set the movie playing.

They relaxed into watching the film and although Edward still felt slightly nervous the atmosphere in the room wasn't awkward. Bella looked perfectly at home sitting beside him and he found himself watching her more than the movie. Having her there was like the daydream he'd had before his nightmares had tainted the idea and he liked it.

Bella caught him watching her a couple of times but each time she just smiled slightly before going back to watching the film. She'd picked the film knowing it would be a pretty safe bet and his earlier interest in it allowed her to believe that his sliding focus wasn't due to boredom of what they were watching but more interest in her.

As the film continued the day began to catch up with Edward. Even with his earlier nap it was still the longest time he'd spent awake since before the attack and although he was enjoying both the film and the company he began to find it hard to keep his eyes open. It wasn't long after he first started trying to stay awake that Bella felt him lean against her shoulder and when she glanced down it was to find him fast asleep. He looked so adorable and she liked the way it felt to have him leant against her so she left him where he was.

When Lucy and Emmett finally reappeared, Lucy dressed in her pyjamas and Emmett in a decidedly soggy looking t-shirt they both stopped to take in the sight on the sofa. Lucy was the first to break into a large grin but Emmett wasn't far behind. It was obvious Edward was fast asleep so they quietly moved through to the kitchen, waving to Bella when she looked to them. Emmett got Lucy her supper before making sure she brushed her teeth then he tucked her into bed, although she chose Edward's bed to curl up in. Knowing Edward would have no complaints about sharing Emmett didn't argue with her and just made sure she was settled before going back to the living room.

"When did he fall asleep?" He asked quietly as he sat down in the chair.

"Not too long ago. Guess I probably ought to leave since he's asleep." She answered although she didn't want to go just yet. She liked being close to him like that.

"Well you may as well finish watching the film." Emmett suggested, it was only just halfway through and seeing as Bella didn't seem to mind Edward sleeping on her he thought it would be best to stay where they were. Esme had told him Edward had had another nightmare and he seemed to be sleeping peacefully now so he didn't want to interrupt that if he didn't have to especially as it was getting him closer to Bella.

"Ok. Did Lucy go to bed ok?" Bella asked pleased that Emmett was happy to leave Edward exactly where he was and didn't expect her to leave.

"Yup she's fine. In Edward's bed but he seems to prefer it that way."

"That's really sweet." She commented looking down at the man sleeping on her shoulder. The more she learnt about him the more she liked him. He was such a sweet, attentive father to Lucy and she found that really endearing. "Is he ok like this? It's not going to end up hurting his ribs or something is it?"

"He looks fine to me." Emmett said with a smile, "Ooo it's getting to the good part!"

They both turned their attention back to the film then while Edward slept on but as he nuzzled into Bella's shoulder a little she couldn't help but glance to him again. It felt really natural to be around him like this which was unusual for her. She had no problem being around boys as friends but as soon as they crossed the line from just being friends to wanting more she froze up and became painfully shy. Her friend Rosalie had always tried to persuade her to push through it and just enjoy herself a little but it had never felt right. Now, sitting with Edward she was pretty sure she'd found her 'right'. If him falling asleep on her left her feeling as content as she was at that moment she couldn't even imagine how it would feel to be wrapped in his arms or what the touch of his lips to hers would be like.

When the end credits came up Bella moved slightly to reach the remote and turn the DVD off. The movement was enough to wake Edward but he didn't stir straight away as the warm soft object he was leaning against smelt amazing and he didn't want to move, he was way too comfortable. Awareness slowly trickled through his mind though and alerted him to the fact that the last thing he remembered doing was watching a DVD with Bella and the warm object his head leant against was moving. Adding the two together he realised that it could only mean he'd fallen asleep on her and although it was the last thing he wanted to do, his eyes shot open and he sat up straight.

"I'm sorry." He apologised immediately but was thrown slightly by the way Bella was looking at him. She didn't look at all annoyed and was instead biting her bottom lip while her eyes sparkled with amusement. He liked that look on her.

"It's ok." She responded trying really hard not to start laughing. One side of his hair was sticking up from where he'd been leant against her and he looked so startled that she was torn between finding it adorable or amusing. She didn't think he'd really appreciate either reaction though so really didn't want to start laughing.

"I didn't mean to fall asleep." He muttered wishing that he hadn't started to blush under her gaze and wondering why she wasn't annoyed with him. She'd come round to visit him and it seemed bad mannered and ungrateful that he'd fallen asleep shortly after her arrival. He was also horrified that he'd ended up leaning on her. That couldn't have been comfortable for her and he was annoyed that his subconscious didn't seem to heed his need to keep some form of distance and now the pull he felt towards her was even stronger and it was taking real effort not to just move back beside her where he really wanted to be.

"Really it's ok, I don't mind and you need your rest. I should probably go now though, college in the morning and you obviously need your bed." She commented with a smile trying to ease him as she could see how uncomfortable he was feeling. She didn't want to make that worse and falling asleep on her seemed to have embarrassed him so she thought it would probably be better to leave so he could settle down and hopefully forget about it. Embarrassed and uncomfortable were the last things she wanted him to be feeling around her as there was certainly no need for it.

"Ok, thank you for visiting." Edward said quietly as he ran a hand through his hair, flattening the part that was sticking up more than usual.

"Thank you for having me. I'll come round again soon and I'll leave the rest of the DVDs here, save you from daytime TV tomorrow."

"Thank you." Edward replied again while Bella stood and slung her bag over her shoulder. After saying goodbye to Emmett who had been watching the whole of their interaction with curious amusement, Bella left and Edward forced himself to his feet announcing to Emmett that he was going to bed. He did not want to wait to find out what Emmett thought of him falling asleep on Bella so hurried to his room where he was happy to find Lucy already asleep in his bed.

Once he climbed into the bed he pulled Lucy into his chest managing not to wake her and tried to dispel the image of having Bella there instead from his head. In an attempt to ground himself in reality and not his daydreams he threaded his fingers through Lucy's hair and breathed in her familiar scent. She was the only girl in his life and the only one there could ever be. Bella was just a friend. A beautiful, amazing, caring and intelligent friend he wished could be more but still, just a friend.


	26. Chapter 24 Meddlesome Siblings

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

_AN - Thank you for all the reviews and alerts/favourites, it's really nice to know the story is still being enjoyed. Sorry this is posted a little later than I meant it to be. I only got halfway through the final edit before I had to go out and on my way home I walked past the cinema...so two hours later I'm finally home! Breaking Dawn Part 1 was just as good the second time through though :)_

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><p><strong>Chapter 24 – Meddlesome Siblings<strong>

The alarm on his mobile rang shrilly, waking Emmett early enough to make sure he could get Lucy up and ready for school before Edward woke and tried to do it himself. Sleeping on Edward's small sofa was not the most comfortable of experiences and as he stretched he could feel a kink in his neck and his back ached a little. It was only a fraction of the pain his brother went through though making him feel guilty that the thought had even registered. Shaking his head at himself he reached for his bag that was left at the side of the sofa and pulled out a fresh set of clothes before heading to the bathroom to get ready for the day.

Feeling a little more awake now that he was showered and dressed Emmett traipsed back through to the living room to fold up his blanket and quilt leaving them in a stack in the corner of the room along with his pillow. The room now tidy he went into the kitchen to put the kettle on and get Lucy's glass of milk and by then it was time to wake her up so he put the milk away then wandered through to Edward's room, trying to be quiet as he pushed the door open, not wanting to wake Edward. That plan failed however as when he woke Lucy and she shuffled out of Edward's arms to sit up and drink her milk he woke up anyway.

"Wha' times it?" Edward asked groggily as he pushed himself up to be sat "Ouch"

"Still sore? It's half eight." Emmett answered.

"Just a bit." He answered with a wince as he reached for his pills and the glass of water that sat on the chest of drawers by his bed.

"You should go back to sleep." Emmett suggested but Edward shook his head.

"I want to take Lucy to school too." He grumbled, causing Lucy to quickly look at him and smile slightly. If he wanted to take her to school she hoped it meant he really was getting better.

"You think you're up to it?" Emmett asked, unsure Edward was able to successfully get down all the stairs never mind get all the way to Lucy's school.

"Won't know if I don't try." He answered stubbornly, already pushing the quilt back so he could get out of bed. He hadn't felt too bad the day before, the aches and pains had been manageable and the coughing fits were getting better and not so common. He certainly didn't want to spend another day stuck to the sofa even if Bella had left him some DVDs to watch. Surely the fresh air would do him some good and he couldn't help but feel his shoulder would be better if he moved a little more, he didn't see how the stiffness would improve if he didn't try to use it more.

"I guess, but we'll take the car." Emmett gave in seeing the determination in Edward's eyes. He didn't want to get into a fight with him as it would do neither of them any good and a bit of fresh air couldn't hurt. If they were in the car it would cut down the amount of walking he'd need to do so the only real problem would be the stairs but if Edward thought he could manage and was determined to try then short of tying him down he doubted he'd be able to stop him giving it a go. He saw Edward smile slightly so hoped it was the right decision and left them both to get ready.

Lucy was quickly dressed and in the kitchen eating her breakfast and by the time she'd finished it Edward had also managed to get dressed. He refused Emmett's offer of breakfast, not feeling in the least bit hungry and instead plaited Lucy's hair for her before she ran off to brush her teeth. Once she had reappeared, bag and coat in hand and shoes on her feet Emmett fastened up her shoes for her before she put her coat on and Edward got up from his chair and followed Emmett out of the flat, Lucy holding tightly onto his hand.

They slowly made their way out of the building, Edward discovering Emmett had been right in being cautious as the stairs proved very painful to negotiate and he was out of breath after just the first few, a fact Lucy and Emmett couldn't miss. Once they were outside and back on flat ground however he didn't feel quite so bad. They reached Emmett's car and Edward got in the back with Lucy, fastening her seatbelt for her then his as Emmett got in the front.

"Where'd the booster seat come from?" Edward asked once Emmett was in as it hadn't been in the car the last time he'd been in it and it looked very new.

"Oh Alice got it so Lucy would be safe in here." Emmett responded glancing at the rear view mirror so he could see Edward's expression as he looked at the car seat. He couldn't see why Edward would take against it as it was illegal and unsafe to have Lucy in the car without it but something about it was obviously making him uncomfortable and it looked like the good mood Bella had left him in the night before was quickly evaporating.

"She get it at the same time she refilled my wardrobe?" Edward asked after a minute taking Emmett by surprise as he hadn't thought he'd noticed that yet. The worn hooded top and jeans he was wearing certainly didn't show he'd found the new clothes.

"Probably. She was just trying to help. I needed the car seat and your old jacket got ruined when you were hurt so she replaced it. I guess she got a little carried away, you know what she's like." He answered hoping to placate Edward but it didn't appear to work as he scowled at the booster seat he was still staring at.

"I don't need things buying for me. I don't want pity or charity. I can look after myself and Lucy just fine." He grumbled.

"No one's saying you can't. We're just trying to help. If it's any consolation Bella did try to stop Alice buying the clothes and that car seat was for me. The cars mine and Lucy wouldn't have needed the booster seat if it wasn't for me being lazy and driving everywhere so it's only right that we pay for that."

Edward didn't respond, he still wasn't happy but he couldn't do anything about it. Emmett was right about the booster seat and Edward couldn't argue about something that was for Lucy's safety but he still didn't like that they were spending money on him. He'd found the new clothes that morning and was determined not to wear any of them. They had been getting on a lot better but Emmett's comment only highlighted how little they actually knew him and it was funny how Bella obviously understood him better when he'd only known her for a short time. He didn't need their money.

Emmett drove the rest of the way in silence and once they reached Lucy's school he got out along with Edward and while Edward walked around to the pavement side of the car Emmett helped Lucy out. Once the car was locked up they moved over to the school gates where Lucy had already spotted Bella and Anna.

"Hey, I wasn't expecting to see you here for a while yet." Bella commented in surprise as she spotted Edward, instantly noticing the less than happy expression and wondering what had happened. He'd seemed fine the night before. There was tension to the way he was standing and she wasn't sure if he was in pain or if something had annoyed him. Glancing to Emmett gave her no more insight as he was busy checking that Lucy had everything she needed for the day.

"I felt a little better and wanted out of the flat." Edward responded with a shrug. Just seeing Bella was enough to ease a little of the bad mood he'd found himself in. For all she made him nervous, being around her also made him feel better and he wasn't sure if that was normal or not. He had no experience with this at all. Trying to ignore his confused thoughts he focused on Bella instead. She looked pleased to see him although as she studied him her smile fell a little and he wondered what she was thinking.

"Well it's good to see you out and about again but be careful not to overdo it." She said and he guessed it was just the concern for his health that had dropped her smile so he assured her he was fine and would be going back to bed once they got home before glancing to the girls and remembering about the card Anna had made for him. Catching her attention he thanked her getting a shy smile in return.

Their interaction and the mention of cards reminded Bella of the news Renee had shared with her once she'd arrived home the night before. Edward's unexpected appearance had thrown her and she'd completely forgotten about it until then. Seeing Edward there though made her hopeful that what she'd wanted to ask him would actually be possible.

"You know what I was saying about Mum spoiling Anna?" She asked once Lucy had commandeered Anna's attention and Edward was back to his usual past time of watching Lucy. Her question made him look up and he nodded to show he was listening so she carried on, "Well it's her sixth birthday on Saturday and she used Phil's current absence to talk Mum into letting her have a birthday party this weekend. We were originally going to just have a family dinner but now it's turned into a princess party for all the girls in their class. Mum already rang round the parents she knows last night and I said I'd ask you so I know it's short notice but I was wondering if you and Lucy would be able to come. Emmett can come as well if he wants, we could do with the extra adult supervision. My friend Rosalie will be there to help out too and if you're not up to it you don't have to come."

"Ok." He answered straight away not even needing to think about it. There was no way Lucy would want to miss it and he wasn't going to turn down an invitation to spend time with Bella as he may as well make the most of having a friend. He was sure by the weekend he'd be ok to be there as although the stairs at the flat block had caused some problems he still wasn't feeling too bad. Having seen Bella's reaction to just two hyperactive five year olds she'd probably need all the help she could get with a houseful of them even if Renee was there. He knew all too well that there were never too many sets of watchful eyes when it came to supervising small children. There was always one who'd find a way to cause trouble. He wasn't sure how much use Emmett would be but looking after children was one thing he knew he was good at and he enjoyed it.

"Really? You're sure you'll be ok?" Bella asked surprised that he'd agreed so quickly. She hadn't really expected him to go as it was short notice and he wasn't well but she'd asked for the purely selfish reason that she'd wanted him there. A houseful of children was not her ideal way to spend a Saturday afternoon and his presence would certainly make it a lot more enjoyable. The fact he was so good with children was just an added bonus, one she was pretty sure they'd need as Renee wouldn't be there the entire time as there was some kind of committee meeting in the morning at her school that she had to attend.

"Should be, I don't feel too bad now and there's another three days between now and Saturday." He shrugged, secretly pleased at the smile his agreement to go had put on Bella's face.

"Well if you're sure, thank you and you really don't have to come if you don't feel up to it on the day."

"I'll be there."

"Me too, I love birthday cake." Emmett joined their conversation having heard the majority of it and catching his invite. There was no way he'd let Edward go without him. He knew he'd be safe at Bella's but he wasn't convinced he wouldn't overdo things and he wanted to make sure he was there to take him home if it got too much.

The bell rang then so they all focussed on saying goodbye to the girls and when Edward straightened up again after hugging Lucy both Bella and Emmett saw the grimace cross his face as the movement pulled on his ribs and while Bella looked at him concerned Emmett just smiled to him sympathetically having expected it after the way the stairs had affected him.

"Time we got you home I think." He commented and Edward nodded, resigned to the fact he was going to be restricted to his bed or the sofa for the rest of the day. For all he'd wanted to go out and it was nice to see Bella going outside had not been his best idea as he was quickly becoming tired and achy.

"See you soon then, remember just ring if you need a hand with Lucy or want to talk." Bella said, slightly sad that they couldn't hang around and talk for a few more minutes but aware that Edward was in pain and needed to get home. He'd done well just making it to the school gates.

"Thanks, I will. See you Saturday." He responded before he moved to get back into the car. Emmett also said goodbye to Bella before getting into the car and driving them back to the flat block. Edward's bad mood returned once they were away from the school and the booster seat was back in sight and by the time they were home he was tired and grumpy making Emmett have to help him out of the car as his body was now unwilling to co-operate with any kind of movement without screaming in protest. It was amazing how fast he could go from feeling ok to wanting to collapse.

Just before they got to the main doors Emmett felt Edward shiver slightly as he came to a standstill, staring to their right. Emmett followed his gaze and saw a man with a baseball cap pulled low over his face sitting on the wall that surrounded the car park. He was dressed in dark clothing and had Edward not frozen he wouldn't have noticed him. He didn't seem to be doing anything alarming, just sitting playing with a phone, twirling it around in his hand like he was waiting for someone to call. Not understanding Edward's reaction he looked back to his brother whose attention had now moved to the door of the building.

"What's wrong? Do you know them?" Emmett asked as Edward started walking again.

"I don't know." Edward answered quietly. It was a truthful answer as he couldn't be sure who it was but he felt their eyes on him and it made the hair on the back of his neck rise and his skin crawl. He remembered James' gang had including a baseball cap wearing man the day they'd attacked him on his way to work but there was no way to be sure it was the same man with the cap pulled low over his face. That was also the thing that made him positive it was him. There was just no way to tell for sure though, he could have just been a friend of someone in the building and waiting for them to come out. Somehow, Edward didn't quite believe that rationalization.

They made it up the stairs and into the flat where Edward headed straight for the living room window which looked out over the car park. Emmett watched him as he stood there and noticed as the tension drained out of his shoulders before he left the window and slumped onto the sofa.

"Everything ok?" He questioned heading for the window himself to see what Edward had been looking at. There was nothing there, even the man who had startled Edward was gone.

"Everything's fine." Edward stated although the unsettled feeling that was plaguing him made him feel like he was lying. Emmett seemed to be of the same opinion as he looked at Edward with a creased forehead and worried eyes.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." Emmett held Edward's gaze for a minute longer until it was clear he wasn't going to break and tell him what was going on. With a sigh he let it drop so as not to aggravate him further and went to find Edward's pain killers as the trip up seemed to have been more than he could really handle.

Edward slept fitfully throughout the rest of the day convincing Emmett that something was bothering him more than unusual. His nightmares returned and Emmett had to listen to him cry out for Lucy and see the tears on his face as nothing seemed to ease them away and waking him didn't seem to help as he just fell straight back into them.

The whole day left Emmett torn up and lost as to what to do. He'd tried calling Esme but she was too busy at work and couldn't get out of it, Alice was at school and Bella would be in college which left him on his own and he had no idea what to do to help Edward. The nightmares weren't going anywhere and each time he woke up he looked more tired than when he'd gone to sleep making his mood even worse. It was a downward spiral. He wouldn't tell Emmett what was happening in his dreams so he couldn't even try to comfort him about them leaving him with no other option than to watch Edward suffer.

By the end of the afternoon Emmett had resolved to ask Carlisle about sleeping pills the next time he saw him as there was no way Edward was going to get the rest he needed with such troubled sleep. He'd woken up again just before Emmett needed to leave to collect Lucy and hearing it was that time Edward turned the TV on in the hope it would keep him awake. He was so tired it was a real fight to keep his eyes open but he knew if he could stay awake until Lucy was home her presence would help.

Emmett arrived at the school gates a little early as he'd been so eager to get Lucy home to her dad. He spotted Bella standing by the gates so headed over to wait for the bell to ring with her. She saw him heading in her direction and smiled until he got close enough that she could see just how stressed he was looking.

"Is everything ok?" She asked worried that something really had happened after Edward's sullen mood that morning and now Emmett's worn down appearance. He shook his head confirming her fears.

"I don't know what it is but Edward's been having nightmares all day. He won't tell me what they're about and they're just exhausting him. Waking him up from them does no good as he's so tired he just falls straight back to sleep. I don't know what to do to help him." He explained miserably, he felt awful for not being able to do anything to help.

"What set them off? I noticed he didn't look entirely happy this morning."

"Oh it wasn't that, he found the new clothes this morning and then saw the booster seat in my car which he seemed to take offence to. I don't know what set off the nightmares. There was a guy hanging around the car park when we got home who seemed to startle him but he wouldn't talk about it."

"What did he look like?"

"Couldn't really tell, he had a baseball cap pulled low over his face and he was dressed in dark clothing. He wasn't even paying attention to us, he was playing with his phone like he was waiting for someone to call." He said and although Bella didn't recognise the description the fact he was playing with a phone did catch her attention.

"I've not seen anyone like that hanging around before but that time I saw the girl in the park that Lucy recognized, she was playing with a phone as well. Maybe they're connected. Edward wouldn't answer any questions about her either." She told him making Emmett look even more troubled.

"You mean that could have been one of the guys that hurt him?" He asked for confirmation. He didn't like that idea at all but it would explain why Edward's nightmares had been so bad all day.

"Could be." Bella shrugged not knowing one way or another but with Edward not being very forthcoming with information if they wanted any chance at catching whoever was hurting him they had to be observant and pick up when there were patterns in his behaviour. It was better to be safe than sorry.

"Damn it! If he'd just said something I could have scared him off." Emmett muttered, the man they'd seen was half his size, there was no way he'd beat Emmett in a fight, he was confident of that but he'd need to be sure of who he was going after before he could risk anything like that. It would get them nowhere and just make his father furious if he ended up on assault charges. If that happened he wanted to make sure it was worthwhile. Bella's suspicions did make sense though and he realised he should have picked up on it sooner. He'd make sure he was on the lookout from now on, any strange behaviour was not going to go unnoticed. They had to work out what was going on one way or another and if Edward was refusing to tell them they'd just have to piece it all together, he couldn't hide it forever.

"Well there's nothing you can do about it now, just watch out for him. If you see him again and Edward has the same reaction it's probably safe to say he's got some kind of connection to what's going on."

"If he does, he won't be walking away again." Emmett growled just as the bell rang. Lucy and Anna soon joined them and it didn't take Lucy long to work out something was wrong.

"Is Daddy ok?" She asked Emmett after she'd said goodbye to Bella and Anna and he was leading her back to his car.

"He's been having nightmares, I think he might just be in need of a hug when we get home." Emmett answered after a moment's deliberation on what to say. He didn't want to worry her but considering how well she could read Edward it would be pointless to try and fool her and would probably only make her worry more. She was going to know Edward hadn't been sleeping peacefully the moment she set eyes on him.

"What are his nightmares about?" She asked as he helped her into the car and to fasten her seat belt.

"I don't know Luce but I'm sure you can make them better." He responded and although she didn't smile she looked more thoughtful than worried so he figured she was ok. She had to be pretty used to this kind of thing by now which was sad but unavoidable. They couldn't take back the past, all they could do was hope to make the present and future better.

The instant they entered the flat Lucy dropped her school bag, pulled of her coat and shoes and ran straight for the sofa. Edward had managed to stay awake but he looked on the brink of passing out again. His eyes were red and sore with black circles underneath them which stood out against the paleness of his skin and his hair was sticking up in all directions once more. Lucy didn't bother asking him any questions and just climbed straight into his arm, letting him take comfort from her presence.

"Missed you Luce." He mumbled, moving them so he was laid out once more and she was cuddled into his chest.

"I missed you too Daddy." She responded before kissing his chest over his heart. He sighed in relief at the calm she brought over him and he let his eyes fall shut as she murmured to him about her day. He didn't want to fall asleep on her but it was impossible to prevent and after she'd assured him she didn't mind he slid into his first peaceful sleep of the day.

Emmett watched as Lucy effortlessly calmed Edward. Just her being there was enough to remove the tension in his body, then as she talked to him in a soft even voice his eyes fell closed. Lucy lowered her voice further, whispering for him to sleep and his breathing got deeper and a minute later she fell silent as Edward slept.

Lucy stayed where she was contentedly for half an hour before she studied Edward's sleeping face and very carefully shuffled out of his arms. Emmett assumed she'd gotten bored and would probably be hungry so he was going to offer her a snack but before he had chance to she'd run off. Wondering what she was up to he wandered out into the corridor in time to see Lucy emerge from Edward's room carrying her teddy bear. It was the same one she'd left in his bed the day before and she took it through to the living room where she sat it down on the sofa by Edward's head. She watched him for a second or two before Edward shifted in his sleep ever so slightly so that he faced the teddy bear and that seemed to be what Lucy had been waiting for as she nodded to herself before turning to face Emmett with a smile.

"I'm hungry." She announced and being baffled by what she'd just done with the teddy bear he couldn't help but chuckle slightly at the random announcement.

"Ok, let's go find some biscuits and juice." He commented, letting her lead the way to the kitchen.

For the rest of the afternoon Lucy played quietly in the living room, stopping every so often to peer at her daddy on the sofa. He continued to sleep peacefully and Emmett came to the conclusion that Lucy's idea of putting the teddy bear near him was probably what was helping. He wasn't sure what her reasoning had been for doing it, but when he'd thought about it the bear would probably be covered in Lucy's scent if she slept with it in her bed so it was probably giving him the same comfort in his sleep that Lucy would, only this way Lucy was still free to play. Even so, she didn't stray far for the sofa and seemed to be happy keeping an eye on him so Emmett left her to it giving him chance to ring Esme and tell her not to worry as Lucy had solved the problem before getting dinner sorted.

They woke Edward up to so he could eat but Emmett was disappointed when he hardly ate anything. He didn't say anything though as he was starting to understand that Edward's disappearing appetite seemed to be a stress response. Lucy scowled at her dad but she also left it alone as he just looked miserable and she hated seeing him like that.

Edward himself was in a horrible mood. The nightmares had left him irritable and tired and the peaceful sleep Lucy had lulled him into hadn't been enough to clear it. He could still hear Lucy's cries from his nightmares echoing in his head and it distracted him enough that he couldn't follow Lucy and Emmett's conversation during dinner at all but it gave him plenty of opportunity to dwell on the fact James and his friends were most likely still watching him from right outside his home.

Emmett was just annoying him as well. He could feel him watching him and he wasn't in the mood for it or company, the only person other than Lucy he probably could have tolerated was Bella but she wasn't there and he had Emmett babysitting him instead. He hated it.

Lucy seemed to be able to read his thoughts that night. As soon as they'd finished eating she jumped up from her seat, grabbed Edward's arm then tugged, making him follow her as she moved through the flat to his room. Once there she tugged him over to his bed and left him sitting there while she ran off to her own room. Wondering what she was up to Edward stayed where he was and waited for her to return. When she did she had her arms filled with toys which she dropped onto his bed before climbing up and setting up camp. She didn't ask him to play so he took the hint and got ready for bed before climbing in under his covers. Lucy smiled to him once he was settled and he stayed awake for a while talking to her as she played with the dolls and teddy bears she'd brought through.

Edward found out she was excited about Anna's party but was a little upset with her as she said she was being mean to Bella and she didn't like that. When he asked how she was being mean Lucy shrugged and said she was just being naughty on purpose and then boasting about not listening to what Bella told her to do. By the sounds of it Edward wasn't surprised Bella had wanted to visit the night before if Anna was purposefully annoying her all the time. He was lucky with Lucy and he'd never wanted a break from her other than in that very first week but he could see how Bella would feel that way with Anna. It had to be hard having so much responsibility for her yet not really having the authority to take control as an older sister was not the same as a parent and Anna had obviously decided that made a big difference.

He was glad Anna's bad habits weren't rubbing off on Lucy as she seemed totally against the way she was currently behaving. The scowl on Lucy's face as she told him about Anna not listening to Bella also showed him just how well Lucy had bonded with Bella over the week she'd stayed at their house. She was acting protective, just the way she did if someone upset him and this was the first time he'd seen that reaction from her in relation to someone else. Not wanting her to fall out with her best friend he reminded her that Anna and Bella were siblings so were meant to get on each others' nerves. She thought about it for a minute before asking if it was like how he didn't always get on well with Emmett and when he said it was kind of like that she started to smile again.

Lucy soon moved the conversation onto just Bella, asking if they'd had fun the night before. He answered her questions as she'd always been naturally inquisitive but the smile his positive responses caused troubled him slightly. She was obviously overjoyed that they were getting along so well but he was worried she'd get her hopes up and only end up upset. He knew she loved Bella and he couldn't blame her, nor could he blame her for wanting them together when he wanted the same thing but where he could understand why it wasn't a possibility Lucy wouldn't. He tried to emphasize that they were just friends, like she was with Anna but she just grinned at him and he wasn't sure whether she was taking him seriously or not.

He ended up at a loss as to what to do. They'd never had that situation before as Edward had barely even talked to a girl, usually shying away from any who tried to strike up a conversation with him and Lucy had certainly never been around any. Bella was a first for them and he didn't know what to say to her about it. She was only five, and hadn't really been around many couples so he didn't even know if she understood the concept of boyfriends and girlfriends. There would be no point in trying to explain to her why that couldn't be him and Bella if she had no idea what it even was. As he thought about it he realised she probably just wanted them to be friends so she could continue to see Bella and he was just projecting his own wants into her intentions so he decided he'd leave it be until she did or said something that warranted further explanation. In the meantime her love for Bella was just another reason why nothing could ever happen between them. He couldn't risk screwing things up and loosing Bella from their lives altogether. It was better to have her as a friend than nothing at all.

Their conversation moved to safer topics as Lucy told him about the art project they'd started at school. He wasn't entirely sure what it was they were doing but it sounded like they were making some kind of mask that Lucy was rather excited about. From her level of excitement he assumed it was going to involve lots of glitter and glue. The messier and more sparkly the art project, the more she seemed to enjoy them. When Lucy pointed out his hair was still sticking up in all directions from his nightmares their conversation dissolved into a tickle war which resulted in a giggling Lucy and a worn out Edward so she kissed his cheek and told him to sleep. Seeing no point in trying to argue with her, Edward pulled her into a hug before letting her run off to go play with Emmett for a while as it was still relatively early.

The next morning Edward woke up feeling just as tired as he had the previous day. He was sure he hadn't had that much sleep and what he'd had, hadn't been peaceful as Lucy had slept in her own bed. His dreams had shifted again. Instead of the nightmare that had been on repeat the previous day. His dreams that night had been filled with past memories that should have been happy but they kept flicking back to the loneliness as he was torn away from his friends and family then James would turn up and taunt him before he'd turn and see Lucy happily playing with Emmett and Alice or Bella, not even noticing him as he called out for her. He wished he'd had Lucy sleeping next to him but that mere thought made him hate himself as he shouldn't have needed his daughter to be his security blanket. He shouldn't have needed one at all and the fact he did made him feel pathetic.

He lay awake, listening out for any movement in the flat and when he couldn't hear anything he turned to look at the clock and realised that Emmett was probably out taking Lucy to school. He thought about getting up and getting himself some breakfast but he didn't really feel like it. Not wanting to stay in bed though in case he just fell back to sleep and back into the dreams he slowly set about pulling himself up. Once stood by the side of the bed he couldn't be bothered getting dressed, he had no need to be as he wasn't intending on going anywhere that day so it currently just seemed like a waste of time, effort and pain. Leaving his room he went to the bathroom before going through to the kitchen and setting about making himself some coffee. Once it was made it took it through to the sofa where he sat down, his hands cupped around the mug. Taking a sip from it and wincing as it burnt his tongue slightly he looked around and spotted one of Lucy's dolls sat on the sofa. Looking at it he realised it was the one he'd got her after he'd first been hurt. She'd dressed it in the dress that had come with it and he could see she'd put one of the toy nappies on it too. The blanket that it came with was laid out underneath it on the sofa. The doll was her favourite one at the moment and it still looked almost new so she'd been taking good care of it.

He slowly drank his coffee as he continued to look at the doll wishing Lucy was there. He guessed she'd been playing with it before going to school for it to have been left on the sofa like that. She'd tried to get him to let her take it to school on a few occasions but he'd insisted that it was too big really for her to take in as it was pretty much life sized. She hadn't complained too much as she had plenty of other dolls she was allowed to take to school. He was glad to see that Emmett hadn't let her take it in, he didn't want Lucy to risk losing it as it was her favourite and he didn't think he could really afford a replacement one at the moment.

It seemed odd to him to be up without Lucy around, he'd missed out on his morning hug and helping her get ready for school and even the goodbye kiss on the cheek that she was so fond off. Thinking that, he realised that Lucy probably had still done that one just he'd been asleep and missed it.

His coffee cup drained, he sat it down and picked the doll up, hugging it to his chest. With it being life size, it reminded him of holding Lucy when she'd been a baby except for the fact it didn't have her warmth and was a bit too plastic feeling. He still found it strangely comforting though, the weight was almost right as he settled down on the sofa. He closed his eyes, thinking of all the times he'd fallen asleep with baby Lucy cuddled to him and with the weight of the doll in his arms it managed to fool him into a more peaceful sleep than he'd had for the night.

Emmett arrived back in the flat after dropping Lucy off at school to find Edward asleep on the sofa, Lucy's doll cuddled tight to his chest. Dropping Edward's keys down on the coffee table in the living room he crossed over to him and lightly ran a hand through his messy hair, looking closely at him and smiling slightly, pleased to see that he looked fairly peaceful.

Lucy had nearly point blank refused to go to school after she'd gone in to check on Edward to find him muttering in his sleep and moving more than was normal. She'd tried to wake him up but he seemed to have been in too deep a sleep and Emmett had persuaded her to let him be, insisting that he was probably only dreaming and that he'd be ok. They'd already been late on getting Lucy to school and there wasn't really time for her to wake him up then calm him down if it had been nightmares so he had persuaded her to say goodbye, which she did by laying a light kiss to his cheek before letting Emmett heard her out the room and flat. They'd managed to get Lucy there on time but she wasn't happy and had made Emmett promise to check on Edward as soon as he got home which he had no problem in doing. He was relieved to find him sleeping peacefully, underneath the calm front he'd been showing Lucy he was just as worried about him as she was. Content that Edward was ok for the moment he moved into the kitchen knowing that the breakfast dishes were waiting for him and the washing needed doing.

Edward stirred awake a while later to find himself staring across at Emmett. He tried to push himself up to sit straighter but didn't release his hold on the doll, still liking the weight of it in his arms. He blinked a few times, trying to wake up fully and finding he was having to struggle to do so.

"How's Lucy?" he asked, his voice groggy from sleep. Emmett couldn't help but smile slightly as he looked at his little brother, his hair all tousled up, eyes still blinking against sleep and the doll clutched to his chest.

"She's fine, we got her to school ok." Emmett answered and watched as Edward settled back down at bit into the sofa, happy in the knowledge that Lucy was ok.

"You missing her?" He asked, nodding towards the doll still held in Edward's arms. Edward blinked at him before looking at the doll then back up at Emmett, a slight pink tinge to his cheeks as he blushed.

"A bit." He muttered, feeling stupid for still not wanting to let go of the doll, "It reminds me of holding her as a baby." He added, wanting to explain his behaviour slightly but knowing he still sounded pathetic. Emmett just nodded having already guessed that but he noticed the pink tinge and downcast eyes and wanted to say something to stop Edward feeling embarrassed and stupid.

"It's not stupid you know." He said, hoping it would help and he meant it. He could see why Edward would find comfort in it as it was like what Lucy had done with her teddy bear. He didn't want Edward to give up the little comfort he'd found just because he was embarrassed as he still looked like he needed the sleep.

Edward glanced up to him and smiled slightly, appreciating the effort but not believing his words for a second. They sat in silence for a while then with Edward thinking about trying to go back to sleep as his head felt sore and stuffy, like it still wanted to be asleep and he had woken too soon. Emmett was trying to work out what to say. He wanted to ask Edward what was bothering him. He knew the nightmares must have been bad, coming home to find Edward cuddled up with a doll rather confirmed that and he wanted to know what was causing them. He'd seen no sign of the baseball cap wearer that morning or anyone else yet after spending half the night trying to figure out what had happened the day before he'd come to the conclusion that whoever that was had to be responsible for his brother's torment. He was dying to just ask but he had the impression that if he did Edward would just lie and say nothing was the matter.

"How are you feeling?" Emmett eventually asked, wanting to break the silence and hoping he could ease himself into asking what he needed or that Edward would just suddenly open up to him.

"My head hurts, think I'm going to sleep again, it doesn't want to be awake." Edward replied, curling back up in his seat and cuddling the doll to his chest again. Emmett had already seen it so he didn't really see a point in losing his bit of comfort.

"Do you want your pain killers?" Emmett asked, if Edward wasn't going to open up about the mental side of things the least Emmett could do was try and help fix the physical side.

"Nah, think I just need to sleep it off. I didn't sleep too well last night." He muttered, glancing up at Emmett quickly before closing his eyes and letting his head rest against the arm of the sofa.

"Everything ok?" Emmett wondered, already knowing it wasn't but hoping Edward would take the question as an opening to tell him what was wrong.

"Yeah, just going to sleep now." Came the answer and with that Edward seemed to almost instantly fall asleep leaving Emmett with no answers but more worries. He was beginning to realise he was pretty useless at helping his brother. He could do the housework, look after Lucy and cover the bills but he couldn't get Edward to open up to him and nothing was going to get better until he did. If he wasn't sleeping well his body wouldn't recover and he wouldn't be rid of the nightmares until his worries were gone which wouldn't happen while the people who hurt him were still out there. He was going to have to talk to Carlisle and Esme and see if they had any suggestions. He was at a complete loss.

Edward managed to sleep through the rest of the day, missing lunch and Emmett leaving to go and collect Lucy from school. He was still fast asleep on the sofa by the time Lucy ran through the living room door, eager to see how he was and tell him about her day at school even though Emmett had warned her on their way in that he might still be asleep. She stopped by the sofa and just looked at him curiously, still cuddling her doll and turned to Emmett who had now entered the living room after shutting and locking the front door.

"Think he's been missing you." Emmett offered by way of explanation when he saw how Lucy was looking at him. Hearing that, Lucy dropped her school bag on the floor and shook her jacket off before climbing up onto the sofa.

"Daddy?" She called, gently prodding his right shoulder to try and wake him up. He muttered something and moved slightly, his arms tightening around the doll but he didn't wake up.

"Daddy, wake up." She tried again but to a pretty similar affect.

"Maybe you should let him be, he's been sleeping all day so his body probably needs it to recover." Emmett suggested but Lucy just scowled up at him. If Edward was cuddling her doll because he missed her then she wanted him to know she was there. She didn't care if Edward slept all night but she wanted him to be cuddling her and not the doll. If he needed the doll then it was obvious to her that he needed comfort and she knew she'd be better at that than any doll.

"Daddy wake up, please." She said again, this time poking him a bit harder and finally his eyes blearily opened, blinking hard a few times before he managed to focus on Lucy.

"Heya baby." He croaked, his body was defiantly still demanding sleep, "How was school?"

"It was ok. Hug?" She asked to which he sleepily smiled, finally putting the doll down and holding his arms out. Lucy scrambled over his legs to be sat in the curve of his body as he lay on the sofa and happily cuddled him, his arms going tightly around her and his eyes closing again, content with the warmth of Lucy next to him and his face buried into her hair slightly providing the comfort that made it impossible for him to stay awake. Lucy settled down into his arms, not bothered at all by the fact Edward had fallen asleep again, she'd known from his voice that he wasn't ready to be awake yet.

"Do you want a drink and biscuit Luce?" Emmett asked, smiling slightly at how happy the pair looked when together, even if one of them was asleep.

"Yes please." Lucy answered, returning his smile and shuffling slightly so she was laid on her side facing Emmett but still cuddled up to Edward. Emmett left for the kitchen, shortly returning with a glass of juice and a biscuit which he handed to Lucy.

"What do you want for dinner?" Emmett asked, settling down on the sofa and watching as Lucy carefully tried to drink her juice without spilling any or moving too much.

"Toad in the hole." She answered with a smile, it was one of Edward's favourite meals but he hardly ever made it due to not being bothered with the fuss of it after a day of working so she hoped it would be something he'd be keen to eat.

Emmett nodded, thinking that although it wasn't exactly healthy he could still add lots of vegetables and right now it was more important Edward ate something than what exactly he ate and it was something he remembered him liking when they were younger.

"Ok, are we going to wake your daddy up for it when it's ready?" He asked, guessing Lucy would probably know better than him whether Edward needed food or sleep more. He was inclined to think food would be more important and as Lucy nodded in response Emmett smiled slightly as it wouldn't have been fun to argue against her.

"I'll go get it started then, do you want the T.V. on?" He said pushing himself to his feet again and hovering by the T.V.

"Yes please." She answered so he turned it on, before passing her the remote. He watched, still smiling as she turned the volume down low so it wouldn't wake Edward before she settled to watch it, her juice now finished and chewing on her biscuit.

Emmett had forgotten just how much mess could be made making toad in the hole. Once it was in the oven he looked around the kitchen and half sighed half chuckled, he was sure Lucy could have done a cleaner job of it than he had. Flour and batter had managed to splatter half the units and even though he didn't know how, he seemed to have used most the kitchen contents in the making of it.

In the living room Lucy was happily snuggled into Edward, more attention being paid to him than the T.V. show that was on. Edward was having peaceful dreams, his arms securely around her even in his sleep as he dreamt about her sitting on his lap as they played with her dolls, the doll of choice unsurprisingly being the one he had spent most the day cuddling until he woke up to a particularly loud growl from his stomach and Lucy's giggling. He struggled to open his eyes and sit up slightly so he could see her.

"What you giggling at?" He asked, his voice still groggy but slightly amused none the less as he focussed on the giggling Lucy, her face lit up by it.

"You." She answered, pointing to his stomach which right on cue grumbled again, sending her back into her giggles. He scowled slightly before ruffling her hair up, still amused by her. Watching her for a minute he suddenly realised why his stomach was growling for food, he could smell what he thought was toad in the hole and he hadn't eaten all day. It was no wonder it was complaining.

"Is Emmett cooking?" He asked Lucy, starting to feel more awake and with that, increasingly hungry. She nodded, finally calming down from her giggles.

"Shall we go see if it's ready yet?" He asked to which she nodded and smiled, thinking that her plan to get Edward eating with the toad in the hole had worked. She slid off the sofa and waited while Edward pushed himself to his feet with only a slight grimace from pain. Once on his feet he followed Lucy through to the kitchen where they found Emmett just finishing serving up.

Hearing them entering the kitchen he turned around and smiled when he saw Edward looking interestedly at the full plates as he sat down. Lucy jumped up onto a seat next to Edward, happily swinging her legs as she watched him accept the meal from Emmett and start to cut into it. Her plate was soon in front of her and Emmett sat on the other side of her with his own.

Dinner was a fairly quiet affair that night as they all ate, everyone encouraged at the fact Edward cleared his plate without any prompting from Lucy. Emmett and Lucy were even more pleased when once finished Edward got up and went to the freezer, dragging out the tub of ice cream. Emmett cleared all the empty plates from the table as Edward divided up the ice cream between two bowls before getting out three spoons.

"Are you feeling a bit better?" Emmett asked as he watched Edward, there was still some sign of pain as he kept rubbing at his chest and stiffness in his joints as his movements were a bit jerkier and slower than normal but the fact he seemed to be volunteering to move around more and was happily going after food suggested Edward's day of sleep had done some good.

"Yeah a bit." He answered, handing Emmett a bowl and spoon and waiting for Lucy to get up before going into the living room. She got the idea and was soon down from her chair and leading the way. They settled down into their usual places, Emmett in a chair and Lucy sat on Edward's knee on the sofa, sharing their bowl of ice cream.

For the rest of the week Edward stayed in the flat. His nightmares were still present whenever Lucy wasn't around yet Emmett still hadn't managed to get a word out of him about them. He'd spend the day sleeping on and off on the sofa between watching TV and the DVDs Bella had left. Emmett caught him occasionally looking out of the living room window but each time he did, he could never see anything unusual there. He wondered if it was a sign Edward was getting restless in the flat again but when he asked if he wanted to go out for a drive or join him to pick Lucy up he'd just shake his head and retreat to the sofa.

Considering he wasn't even keen to go and pick Lucy up made Emmett believe he was scared to go outside. He'd been so eager on Tuesday morning to go that he couldn't see any other reason why he'd refuse when Emmett was offering to take him rather than trying to persuade him to stay home. Other than the lack of peaceful sleep making him more tired than he should have been his health did seem to be improving. When Esme visited with Carlisle on the Friday afternoon carrying a new teddy bear for Lucy and a wrapped gift for her to give to Anna the following day they both commented that he looked better. Carlisle was especially pleased to hear the coughing fits had decreased considerably and the aches were all beginning to get better. Even his eating had improved but his mood still wasn't great.

He was fine when Lucy was there, or when Esme and Carlisle visited but when it was just him and Emmett he was quiet and edgy. Emmett was looking forward to Anna's party hoping that Edward would cheer up a little once he was out of the flat and around Bella for a while. His hopes appeared to be right when they all got up on Saturday morning and Edward was bright and cheerful. He spent the morning chasing Lucy round the flat trying to tickle her and they both ignored Emmett's cautions to be careful as they chased around the kitchen where he was washing up.

By the time they arrived on Bella's doorstep Lucy was dressed in one of her favourite dresses that was white with a pink ribbon tied around the waist and the skirt had a layer of light pink netting over the top with little pink roses scattered across it and Edward was still smiling cheerfully.

"Wow don't you look pretty!" Bella greeted Lucy as she pulled the door open.

"Same could be said for you." Emmett commented with a grin while Bella narrowed her eyes at him. Anna had insisted Bella dressed up for the occasion so along with Rosalie's help she'd managed to force her into a blue knee length dressed which was fitted at the top and flared out a little at her hips. It was made from a soft silky fabric which Edward couldn't help but think looked beautiful on her. They'd also curled her hair, pinning back the front sections but letting the rest sit loose around her shoulders and Anna's touch could be seen in the make-up as although her eyes had been made dramatically large there was a healthy sparkling of glitter to go with it.

"Anna forced me to dress up so don't comment." Bella warned but Edward thought she was being unnecessarily wary as she really did look beautiful. She stepped aside to let Lucy run into the house with Emmett following her while Edward lingered behind.

"You look beautiful." He commented quietly as he passed Bella making both of them blush but instead of cautioning him like she had Emmett she smiled slightly while closing the door.

"Thank you. It's good to see you. You're looking happy." She responded. Emmett had told her he was still suffering with nightmares and seemed down whenever they were on their own so she was glad to see him smiling.

"We had fun playing this morning and we are at a party." He answered as she led them through to the kitchen where Anna was already tearing into the wrapping paper on the present Lucy had been carrying. She was dressed in what looked like a Cinderella dress complete with tiara and when they joined them Bella grabbed another tiara and gave it to Lucy to put on.

"We've got one for everyone. Anna was insistent when she said she wanted a princess party." Bella explained before noticing that Emmett and Rosalie were staring at each other and that she hadn't even introduced everyone. "Rosalie this is Emmett, Edward and Lucy and everyone this is Rosalie."

Rosalie was tall, blonde and curvy dressed immaculately in a red dress that was perfectly suitable for a child's party yet still managed to show off her hourglass figure. From the way Emmett was looking at her Edward wondered if he ought to warn Bella but then realised he was making the same assumptions about his brother as they made about him. While it had been true of Emmett when they were younger he had no idea if he'd changed since then. Rosalie seemed just as interested as she smiled at him and held a hand out for him to shake. Emmett took hold of her hand gently but didn't shake it, instead he lifted it and kissed the back of her hand.

"You might want to watch those two." Edward found himself mumbling to Bella as it appeared Emmett was testing out his charms. The last thing Edward wanted was for his brother to screw things up with Bella's friend. That would not help him to keep Bella as a friend.

"Oh don't worry, Rosalie can look after herself. Plus I told her some of the stories Jasper's told me." Bella responded with a smile before Anna stomped over to her, a tiara held in her hand.

"You're not wearing yours!" She stated with a stomp of her foot making Bella sigh and accept the plastic tiara.

"This is so not fair, Rosalie doesn't have to wear one." She grumbled to her sister as she grudgingly put the tiara on. Edward couldn't help but laugh a little at the indignant expression on Bella's face. She really must not have liked having to be girly but Anna wasn't taking no for an answer.

"They're not so bad. It looks good." He commented making Bella glare at him.

"Uhuh, you're only saying that because you don't have to wear one." She responded so with a grin he reached over to the table where there was a large pile of the plastic tiaras and picked one up, placing it on his own head with a grin.

"I don't mind dress up." He said with a shrug making Bella stare at him before she burst out laughing at the sight of him wearing a tiara. He joined in her laughter and they caught everyone else's attention. Emmett just shook his head in amusement while Lucy ran up to him and hugged him. Edward didn't care that he probably looked stupid as it had made Bella laugh and she no longer seemed to be so annoyed with her little sister so it was worth it.

Once all the children arrived the house was full of shouting and laughter and they were running around everywhere. They'd managed to get them all under control long enough for Rosalie to give them their princess makeovers so they all had sparkly pink nail varnish and glittery make-up on to go with their tiaras. The only way they'd managed to keep them all occupied during the process however was Edward had volunteered to be the guinea pig and had let the girls practice their make-up skills on him so he ended up with not just his tiara but glittery make-up and nail varnish. Bella had rescued him from the pink glittery stuff though as she'd hurriedly got out some of her own black nail polish for them. She'd been totally surprised when Edward had volunteered to keep them all occupied then sat there letting them put make-up all over him. He looked totally ridiculous yet he didn't seem to care. In fact it was the happiest she'd ever seen him.

"It washes off and they had fun." He commented when Bella questioned why he'd let them do it and then he'd gone off to play with them in the living room again. Now she was standing in the kitchen with Rosalie cutting up the large birthday cake for everyone. They'd got a perfect view of Edward through all the open doors, sitting on the sofa with Lucy on one knee, Anna on the other and the rest of the children sitting around them on the floor as he read them stories. The party was coming to an end and they were trying to calm them all down a little for when everyone's parents arrived to collect them.

"I can see why you like him, though his brother's more my type." Rosalie said making Bella tear her gaze away from Edward to look at her.

"Edward seemed to think you were Emmett's type as well." She commented hoping to distract Rosalie from where Bella knew the conversation was headed. Unfortunately Rosalie was not going to let that happen, she'd waited too long for Bella to be interested in a guy to just let it drop.

"Hmm well we're not talking about me. So what are you going to do about Edward?"

"What do you mean?" Bella tried to brush it off but the blush that took up residence on her cheeks made Rosalie smile and push on.

"Well you like him don't you so what are you going to do about it?"

"Yes, I like him but I don't even know if he feels the same. I mean I think he does but he keeps himself closed off most of the time and then there's all this stuff going on so it's probably not a good time even if he did like me." Bella answered while looking down at the cake and starting to wrap the individual pieces to put into the party bags.

"If he's got that much going on is he worth it?"

"That's a little harsh and of course he is." Bella answered sharply not liking at all what Rosalie was insinuating and she was glad Edward was too far away to be able to hear what they were saying.

"Sorry I just don't want to see you getting hurt. Aside from whoever has it in for him, do you even know what happened with Lucy's mother? Then there's Lucy herself, she's absolutely adorable but she's got to complicate things."

"I love Lucy, she seems to like me and he trusts me to take care of her so I don't think she'd be a complication, I already know they come together or not at all. As for her mother, I don't know anything about her, I assume she's not around as I've never heard any of them mention her."

"That bitch is defiantly not around." Emmett announced making both of them jump as he appeared from behind them. How he'd sneaked in without either of them noticing Bella had no idea. There was only the one entrance into the kitchen and they were facing that so she could watch Edward.

"Bitch? What happened with her?" Rosalie asked, instantly intrigued by the harsh words and tone from Emmett.

"She dumped Lucy and as far as I'm aware Edward hasn't heard from her since. You've seen how devoted he is to Lucy, there's no way he'd want anything to do with her even if she was around after she abandoned her like that. Anything else you want to know about her you'll have to ask Edward but good luck getting answers, I don't even know who she is." Emmett answered before he suddenly grinned and revealed just how long he'd been in the kitchen listening to their conversation, "Oh and as for not knowing if he likes you or not? He does though he seems to be trying to ignore it for some stupid reason. If you really do want to be with him don't give up and don't wait for him to take the lead or you'll be waiting for years. I think you two would be great together and Rosalie? You so are my type."

With that he left the kitchen, a piece of cake in one hand and a smile firmly in place as the two girls stared after him.

"Well, looks like your good to go with Edward." Rosalie finally commented making Bella smile a little as she thought about it. She'd thought Edward liked her so it was nice to hear Emmett could see it too. It gave her the confidence she'd need but she still knew it would take time and she had no idea how to get him to stop ignoring his feelings if that was what he was doing or even why he'd want to do that to begin with.

"I'd say the same for you with Emmett." She brushed off Rosalie's comment before she could take it any further. She wanted to do things her way and not get pushed into doing something too soon and messing it all up, it would be better if she figured it out on her own.

"Oh no, I'm going to make him wait." Rosalie responded, "I think playing hard to get is the way to go there. I've not forgotten the stories you told me. He's going to have his work cut out for him if he wants me."

"That I don't doubt."

Renee interrupted them then to finish getting the party bags ready as the parents were due any minute. They finished up then went through to join Edward. It was clear he was starting to get tired so Renee coaxed Anna and Lucy away with the promise of cake and lead all the children into the kitchen while Rosalie and Emmett helped heard them all leaving Bella and Edward alone.

"Do you want help getting that make-up off?" She asked assuming he wouldn't want to go outside complete with tiara and pink glittery eye shadow.

"That would be good, thanks." He answered with a tired smile. It had been a long day what with his and Lucy's excitement that morning and then the party. He'd had fun though and he was glad he'd been feeling well enough to enjoy it.

"Come on then, I've got some make-up remover in the bathroom." Bella said before leading him up the stairs and pointing for him to sit on the edge of the bath while she found the things they'd need. As she came towards him with the cotton wool pads and a bottle of make-up remover he knew he could have done it himself but she seemed to want to help with it and having spent the day around her he was craving the closeness so he didn't say anything and just closed his eyes as she gently started to wipe the make-up off.

"Thank you for today. I don't know how we would have coped without you." She commented, trying to ignore the charge that was coming from where her hand brushed lightly against his skin as she tried to remove the glitter that had spread everywhere. Just like Edward, she knew he didn't really need her help but buoyed by Emmett's earlier speech she had wanted to see how he'd react. The fact he hadn't said a word or moved away from her touch gave her even more hope.

"You don't need to thank me, I had a lot of fun." He answered while opening his eyes. She was so close to him and looked so stunning in the blue dress. He wished they were closer. He could see in the mirror on the wall behind her that his face was clean and she stepped away to dispose of the used cotton wool pads so he stood suddenly feeling awkward.

"Even so, thank you." She repeated and in a moment of courage she moved back over to him, went up on her toes and kissed his cheek, placing her hands on his shoulders to hold her balance. When she was once again on flat feet he stared at her in shock while she blushed furiously. He didn't know what to say or do. He wanted nothing more than to reach out and pull her back to him, to wrap his arms around her and find out just how it would feel to kiss her but at the same time that thought terrified him. Running one hand through his hair and shoving the other deep into his pocket to stop himself doing something he'd regret he glanced to the door and knew he had to leave.

"You're welcome. I should go, it's been a long day." He muttered and while Bella was disappointed by his reaction it was what she had expected so she tried not to let it get to her and nodded.

"Ok, let's go find everyone else, they're probably all still in the kitchen." She responded managing to find a smile again. When they entered the kitchen they could both feel the stares from Rosalie, Emmett and Renee and while Bella met Rosalie's stare and shook her head ever so slightly Edward kept his eyes down and headed straight for Lucy, telling her it was time to go.

There were hugs from everyone, Edward getting more and more twitchy with each one, before they could leave. They wished Anna happy birthday one more time, pulled Emmett away from staring at Rosalie and accepted their party bags from Renee who also thanked Edward for all his help and then they were out of the house and back in Emmett's car.

Bella stood at the open front door watching as they drove away, Rosalie and Renee beside her. Once the door was shut they both turned to her, Renee asking the question they both wanted answered after Edward's hasty departure.

"What happened?"

"Nothing, absolutely nothing." She answered quietly thinking how true that was. She'd seen it in the way he looked at her, he'd felt exactly the same way she had but where she'd tried to push their limits a little he'd closed down and fled. If anything was ever going to happen she was going to have to find a way to get him to talk first.


	27. Chapter 25 Key To The Floods

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

AN - You're all going to hate me by the end of this but it had to be done...

_**WARNING - This chapter hints at some themes that may be upsetting.**_

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><p><strong>Chapter 25 – Key To The Floods<strong>

Edward was quiet for the car ride home. Lucy happily chatted to Emmett about Rosalie and while she was commenting how pretty she was Emmett caught a glance of Edward in his rear view mirror. He was staring out of the window blankly and his expression was miserable. It was a far cry from the happy excited Edward that had been present for most of the day leaving him to wonder if he was just tired or if something had happened with Bella while they'd been alone other than the removal of make-up.

Edward didn't notice his brothers scrutinizing gaze, too lost in his own thoughts. He was pretty sure he'd over reacted in the bathroom. All Bella had done was try to thank him for helping out and he'd run away, probably making her think he was crazy. His reactions were so all over the place when it came to her and he didn't know why. No one else he'd met had ever affected him the way she did. One minute he wanted her closer and the next he was running away, it made no sense to him. The fact she'd even been that close in the first place baffled him, she knew too much about him to want anything to do with him yet she was still there. It gave him hope and filled him with fear. He knew all the reasons he couldn't have her, and there were many, yet he still wanted her. When it had just been him and Lucy he'd been content, a little lonely at times but nothing too bad. Now there was a part of him that demanded Bella's presence and it was getting harder to ignore it. Maybe it would have been ok if it hadn't of been for the fear. Having her as close as she'd been in the bathroom may have sent a thrill through him but it had also created nerves so strong he'd felt his heart rate increase and if he'd stayed any longer he was pretty sure his breathing would had suffered. The need to run had been out of his control, he'd had to get out of there even while that small part of him screamed to stay exactly where he was. He would have asked Emmett if that kind of response was normal just to put his mind at ease if it hadn't been for the fact he knew Emmett would take it the wrong way. Lucy was already trying to push them together, he'd seen the way Esme had looked at them and he knew just what Emmett would have thought when he first arrived at the hospital. It was hard enough as it was without adding fuel to the fire. He did not need Emmett's idea of encouragement and he certainly didn't want it getting back to Alice.

Once back in the flat Lucy ran off to her room to change out of her party dress leaving Emmett and Edward alone. Emmett had left it alone in the car as Lucy hadn't seemed to have noticed anything was wrong but now she was distracted and Edward was still looking down he had no problem bringing it up.

"Are you ok?" He asked bluntly and it appeared the question took Edward by surprise as his gaze snapped to him but it took a minute for the question to filter through and be understood.

"I'm fine." He finally answered, "It's been a long day."

"So you're just tired?" Emmett wondered not quite sure if he believed that but it was plausible. Edward still wasn't a hundred percent and he had used a lot of energy and moved around more than he had all week. It would be understandable for him to be tired and achy again.

"Yeah." Edward agreed, pleased that Emmett accepted his lie so easily but then it wasn't really a lie as he was tired, it just wasn't what his main problem was at that moment.

"Hmm ok. Do you want to go get some sleep then? I'll keep Lucy occupied." Emmett suggested but Edward shook his head. He'd done nothing but sleep for the last few days and he wasn't quite ready to revisit his nightmares.

"I'll be ok for a while yet."

"Ok, so...what did you make of Rosalie?" Emmett asked making Edward shake his head and sigh. It was better than him asking questions about Bella though so he played along and listened to Emmett list her favourable qualities. He had to agree she had seemed nice. He hadn't really interacted with her much as he'd been too busy playing with all of Lucy and Anna's classmates but she had been good with the kids and she'd been pleasant to him. The fact Bella was good friends with her lead him to believe she had to be a good person as he couldn't see Bella associating with someone who wasn't. He was amused to hear Emmett hadn't managed to acquire her number though and hoped it would remain that why at least for a while. It was about time Emmett had to work for something and if Bella was right, he'd met his match in Rosalie.

Esme and Carlisle visited the following day, shortly followed by Alice and Jasper. Lucy revelled in the attention, pulling out all her dolls once more and getting Alice and Esme to play. Edward however stayed back for once and didn't join in. Instead he remained in his usual spot on the sofa and watched everyone else. It was the first time Jasper had been to the flat since he'd been home and Edward found himself watching him and Alice in particular. They were so aware of each other and at ease. It was blatantly obvious how much they loved each other and while he was happy for his little sister he couldn't help but feel jealous. There was no sign of the anxiety he felt when near to Bella and he couldn't imagine it ever being there for them. They looked like they had always been together. It was probably yet another sign that he could never have anything with Bella but it also made him wonder if there was something wrong with him.

He'd never had any interest what so ever in any girls he'd come across until Bella and at school he had definitely been more at home with a piano than chasing after girls like Emmett had. It hadn't seemed strange then; he was younger so he assumed it was something that would change as he got older. Then Lucy had happened and he just hadn't had time or opportunity for it and he'd been fine pouring all his time and energy into looking after her. The girls who had shown interest in him while he was at work or waiting outside the school gates he'd had no interest in and that hadn't ever bothered him until now.

It wasn't just Alice and Jasper that were making him question himself. Emmett only seemed excited when they'd talked about Rosalie and he'd seen no sign of nerves in him the day before. Surely if the anxiety Edward felt was normal than there would have been signs of it in Emmett as he'd only met Rosalie for the first time then yet he'd appeared as confident as ever. It could have just been his difficulty in trusting people, he knew the way his parents had chucked him out had left its mark but he did trust Bella. He'd let her take Lucy from the hospital and take care of her for a week without any major worries so he didn't think that was it either. That only left the options that it being the first time he'd ever felt like that made the nerves worse or there was something wrong with him he hadn't realised before. He couldn't remember what had happened with Lucy's mother so if anything ever could and did happen with Bella it would all be his firsts, as far as he was concerned he hadn't even kissed anyone before. He really hoped that was the source of the fear as he didn't want to have yet another flaw.

Sick of his thoughts and looking for a distraction he got up and headed for the living room window. There was no one out there and nothing else of interest to hold his attention so he moved on, heading for the kitchen to get a drink. He wasn't really thirsty but he wanted something to do and while he could have joined in Lucy's game she was still filling Alice and Esme in on the party and if he stayed listening to that he knew there would be no chance of moving his thoughts on from Bella.

"Is Edward ok?" Carlisle asked as he watched him leave the room. Neither him, Jasper or Emmett were quite so enthralled by Lucy's dolls.

"I don't know. Something's eating at him but he won't talk about it." Emmett shrugged. He'd thought the visitors might have broken through his thoughts and cheered him up a little but if anything he seemed even more unhappy.

"Has his sleeping improved yet?" Carlisle questioned with concern. He could see Emmett was worried which was hardly surprising considering it looked like Edward was pulling away from everyone. He'd been doing so well the week before with opening up a little through talking to him and Esme and getting along better with Emmett. Now he didn't even seem to be trying to talk to any of them and that wasn't good, especially not with everything he was trying to cope with.

"Don't think so. He won't talk about that either." Emmett grumbled.

"Alice said he was doing better. What changed?" Jasper asked. When they'd been friends in school he'd always been a lot quieter than his older brother but he had been close to his siblings and if something had bothered him he'd usually talk it through with someone. He knew that had changed but from what Alice had told him they had all assumed a little of the old Edward was returning as he started to trust them again.

"There was a guy hanging around the flat block that seemed to trigger the nightmares but he cheered up yesterday morning. Then on the way home from Bella's he shut down again. He's fine with Lucy but he won't talk to me."

"I'll see if he'll talk to me, if nothing else I can maybe get him something to help him sleep better. He could just be tired." Carlisle suggested before getting up and joining Edward in the kitchen.

"How are you doing Edward?" He asked as he took a seat at the table where Edward was sat staring into a cup of tea. He lifted his head at the question and Carlisle could see why Emmett was worried by the lost look in his eyes.

"I'm fine."

"You know you're worrying Emmett? We can all see something's wrong."

"It's nothing." He sighed dropping his eyes back to his cup.

"That's not true. He told us about the nightmares. Talking to someone might help or there's medication that could help you sleep." Carlisle suggested, letting Edward know they weren't swallowing his attempts to just brush everything off. It didn't have quite the effect Carlisle had been hoping for.

"He had no right to say anything about that. I hate this." Edward spat pushing the cup away from him so he could rest his elbows on the table and sink his head into his hands. He was in no mood for being questioned and his melancholy was quick to switch to anger as at least that was easier to express without letting out more than he wanted anyone to know.

"He's worried Edward. He doesn't know what to do to help you, he was just asking for help. What do you hate?" Carlisle responded patiently. He was glad to see some kind of response from Edward even if it was anger. It was better than him bottling things up.

"This! Being baby sat all the time. I can take care of myself, I've been doing it for years. I don't need everyone poking their noses in and wanting me to talk all the time. It's my life, my problems, I don't need anyone else involved." He grumbled. It wasn't what he wanted to say but he was so confused and tired it just came out. Something was building inside him, he could feel it and he just wanted to be left alone. He didn't want to talk about any of it, didn't even want to think about it anymore, he'd had enough.

"We know you don't _need_ us but we want to help. It doesn't mean you can't take care of yourself it just means we care about you. What's happened Edward? Have they threatened you again or is it something else?" Carlisle continued to press. He could see how close to the edge Edward was. His eyes were wild and he was obviously frustrated. He got the impression Edward's angry words were masking something much worse and although he welcomed the anger he wanted to know what was fuelling it. Unfortunately Edward was too aware of what he might blurt out if he let the anger get the better of him and he couldn't risk it. He needed the conversation to end.

"It's nothing! I'm just tired and fed up. Please just leave it alone." He pleaded while Carlisle watched the fire suddenly go from his eyes as Edward regained control and his anger was replaced once more with the despair that it had started from.

"Ok, just know that you can talk to us. You don't have to cope with everything on your own anymore." Carlisle relented knowing that Edward wasn't going to break this time and the opportunity for questions was clearly over. If he couldn't get the information they needed to help him then the only thing he could do for the time being was respect his wishes and leave him in peace.

On his own once more Edward felt worse than he had before Carlisle had joined him. Now it wasn't just his obsessive thoughts about Bella, but his worries about James and his annoyance at everyone trying to take over his life bearing down on him. He wished everyone would just leave for the night but then he felt guilty as he knew they just wanted to help him and he had no valid reasons at all for acting that way towards Carlisle or Esme. With a sigh he realised he was going to have to do better at pretending. With all the current distractions people provided for Lucy it was easier for him to get by without putting up the front of everything being perfectly fine all the time. He'd neglected to remember that it wasn't just Lucy he had to fool any more, everyone else paid way too much attention to him so he was just going to have to do better. Plastering a fake smile on his face he stood and went back through to everyone else, sitting down beside Lucy before lifting her onto his lap and choosing a doll.

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><p>Edward slept right through Lucy going to school again and when he woke up his mood still hadn't improved. He couldn't remember having nightmares for once but as soon as he was awake his mind went back to the thoughts he'd been stuck with the previous day. He didn't even understand why he couldn't just forget it all as it was pointless anyway. It didn't matter why Bella made him nervous to the point of fear when nothing was ever going to happen between them.<p>

Unwilling to spend yet another day sleeping he got up and made himself some coffee before turning the TV on hoping for a distraction. When Emmett returned from dropping Lucy off it was to find him glaring at the TV which was showing a morning talk show.

"Something wrong?" He asked, startling Edward slightly as he'd been so engrossed at glaring at the TV he hadn't heard him enter.

"This is so stupid. Why can't they make good day time TV shows?" He responded, waving the TV remote towards what was on the screen before dropping it down with a sigh as he leant back into his seat.

"It's probably a big plot to try and discourage people from skiving off work." Emmett answered cheerfully, pleased that Edward's bad mood seemed to be related to something stupid for once.

"Well that's not very fair on the people who would love to be at work but aren't allowed." Edward muttered sending a glare Emmett's way before he reached for the remote again and switched channels.

"True but that changes nothing so you're stuck with it unless you want to go out for a drive or something?" Emmett suggested since he'd managed ok with Anna's party but with a glance towards the window Edward sighed and shook his head.

"Ok daytime TV it is then, let me know if you change your mind." Emmett replied before leaving him to resume glaring at the TV as he went to sort out a shopping list in the kitchen. Alice had volunteered to pick the shopping up for them if he worked out what they needed when she'd seen they were running low on food the day before.

By the time they'd finished lunch Edward was well and truly into his bad mood and was once again driving Emmett mad with channel hopping. Unfortunately for Edward, this time Emmett had had enough. He knew something had been bothering Edward for the last couple of days and he was pretty sure that the level of anger he was directing towards the TV was a result of whatever it was that had been upsetting him before. They were going to talk and get to the bottom of it before Edward ended up breaking the TV.

"Ok I've had enough. What the hell is getting to you?" He snapped breaking Edward's attention from the TV and to him.

"Nothing, I'm fine."

"You are not. I'm not as stupid as you think I am. There is something wrong and you're going to tell me what it is so we can fix it. Lucy's going to notice, you're lucky Esme, Alice, Carlisle and Jasper were distracting her yesterday or she already would have."

"I'm just tired." Edward tried to fall back on his favourite excuse but Emmett really had had enough so that wasn't going to cut it.

"No you're not. In fact this is the least tired I've seen you look all week. Did something happen between you and Bella at Anna's party? You were fine until you guys were left on your own, then you couldn't get out of there fast enough."

"Nothing happened."

"Well why not?" Emmett asked knowing that he was most likely provoking his brother but he couldn't stand his non answers anymore. He wanted to know what was going on and if angering him was the only way to make him snap and open up a little then it had to be done. It was also a genuine question as he'd been sure something had happened and Edward had taken it wrong somehow as it was only shortly before they'd vanished up the stairs that he'd told Bella Edward liked her and then that morning as they'd been waiting for the school bell to ring she'd asked how Edward was, appearing more concerned than usual.

"What do you mean by that?" Edward asked totally thrown by the question as it hadn't been what he'd expected at all.

"You both like each other, you're both single. It's about time one of you did something about it." Emmett responded watching Edward's reaction closely. He was going against Esme's advice to leave it alone but he couldn't stand seeing Edward so miserable so he was going to keep pushing until he got to the bottom of what was wrong and right now he was sure it had something to do with Bella.

"What? No. No way." Edward spluttered. He'd known Emmett had had his suspicions about him but to hear him say Bella liked him as well was just a cruel joke. It was hard enough dealing with his own feelings without Emmett throwing in a load of false hope.

"Yes way. Everyone can see it, just ask Esme or Alice. What we don't get is why neither of you are doing anything about it."

"Because there's nothing to do anything about! We're just friends and that's all we'll ever be." Edward shot back feeling his bad mood growing into anger with Emmett providing the perfect target. He did not want to talk about Bella, especially like this.

"I know for a fact that's not how Bella feels."

"You're wrong. There is no way that could ever be true." Edward insisted wishing Emmett would just shut up. It was hard enough to get his thoughts away from Bella already. He was just going to make everything worse.

"I heard her and Rosalie talking at the party. She wants more than just friends." Edward just stared at him for that comment before shaking his head.

"You're mistaken and I'd rather not talk about this." He finally responded but Emmett wasn't going to back down the way Carlisle had.

"No, I'm not, and we are talking about it. She likes you, you like her. What's the problem?"

"Fine say you're right about Bella, why does that mean I like her?"

"Oh come on! That's been obvious since the moment you let her look after Lucy. You're so much happier around her and you're a lot more open with her than you are the rest of us so again, what's the problem?"

"I don't want a girlfriend." Edward muttered in the hope it would make Emmett drop it. He was in no mood for being pushed like Emmett seemed determined to do. He could feel something building just like he had when Carlisle had questioned him. If the subject wasn't changed soon he was going to snap and something was telling him he wouldn't like what would happen..

"I don't believe that. You've been on your own for five years now, you must be feeling lonely and now we're all around we can baby sit Lucy so why not?" Emmett questioned knowing Edward was lying but lost as to why.

"I wouldn't be good for Bella and I wouldn't even know what to do with a girlfriend if I had one. I'm better off on my own." Edward returned with a sigh. Emmett wasn't going to drop it or be fooled by his lies. Unfortunately he didn't seem to believe the truth either.

"You wouldn't know what to do with one? You've got Lucy so you obviously know something.." Emmett started only to be cut off by a very angry Edward as Emmett had just said the one thing sure to break him. The anger he'd been trying to reign in was ignited.

"That was my _only_ experience with a girl and it didn't exactly turn out fantastically did it? I couldn't even remember it at the time, never mind now!" He all but shouted.

"What do you mean only? Surely you've had girlfriends." Emmett questioned, stunned by what Edward had just said. He couldn't see how that could be true. No one had ever told them what had happened the night Lucy had turned up and he'd always just assumed that her mother was a secret girlfriend. He'd always believed Edward had a busy social life in school, the stories that went around had certainly suggested so and Edward had never countered them.

"NO! I have never had a girlfriend. I thought you understood when you came back but obviously not. You believe the same as Dad does don't you? You all think I had just been asking for what happened?" Edward ranted. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt this angry, it even surpassed the last time he'd seen his dad. He'd thought they'd all believed what he'd said about Lucy's mother and to hear that they never had was ripping him apart all over again. The little trust he'd managed to rebuild with his brother and sister was shattered.

"No we don't, honestly we don't. I just always thought you'd had girlfriends and I did before any of the stuff with Lucy even came up. You just always gave that impression. There were all those rumours you never denied and you'd vanish at lunch time and breaks." Emmett replied hurriedly, he could see that this matter wasn't going to be dissolved easily and had no clue how to rectify what he'd said. This was not how he had thought the conversation would go and how he'd managed to stumble into such a minefield he had no idea. He'd just wanted to find out what was bothering Edward and make him see sense about Bella. He just wanted him to be happy.

"Ever heard of trying to look cool? Maintaining a reputation? Did I ever straight out say that I had a girlfriend? I had nothing to do with any of those rumours but I let them be thinking the people that mattered would know the truth and the rest would leave me alone. I spent breaks and lunchtime in the music rooms practising piano!" Edward stormed, not calming down at all and Emmett just shook his head which didn't help.

"Edward I'm _really_ sorry. I don't know what to say to make this better but we really don't think what Dad does. We know it wasn't your fault, we know you hadn't asked for it and we are all unbelievably proud of you." He tried, desperately trying to calm Edward down as his anger was only escalating. Edward however did not seem willing to listen.

"I'm going to get Lucy." He announced while standing up and with that he was out of the living room and slamming the door leaving Emmett sitting on the sofa wondering how on earth he was going to patch things up and return them back to the way they had been. Everything had been going so much better what with Edward accepting them back and accepting their help but now it looked that he had just ruined all of that. It wasn't until he heard Edward moving around in the corridor by the front door that his words registered and he realised what he was intending to do.

"Where are you going?" Emmett stopped him as he rushed through to the door just before Edward was about to leave. When he turned back to face him the anger was still clear on his face.

"To pick Lucy up from school." He told him coldly, reaching out for the door handle again.

"Hang on a bit and I'll take you in the car." Emmett told him, alarmed that Edward wanted to walk all the way there and back again. He had been doing a lot better but he didn't think Edward could really manage that yet.

"No thanks, I'll walk." He said stepping out of the door now, not wanting Emmett's help. He was still angry at him and just wanted to be on his own for a while. He couldn't stay in the flat and it was early enough that even if he had to walk slowly he'd still reach the school in time.

"I'll walk with you then." Emmett tried, reaching out to grab his jacket, not wanting Edward to go on his own if he was insistent on walking but Edward shook his head. He had to get away from Emmett or he was going to end up punching him and he was fairly certain that would only result in him hurting his own hand.

"No, I'll go on my own." He replied and with that had closed the door and started off towards the stairs. Emmett stood staring at the closed door, agonizing over whether to follow him or not but in the end he realised that Edward was already mad enough with him and didn't think he would appreciate being followed so he did the only thing he could think of that might help and rang Bella. He was relieved when she picked up but knew she was going to be angry with him too when she asked what was wrong.

"I really screwed up, Edward's walked out."

"Walked out to where?" Bella questioned not understanding what Emmett was telling her. She had been trying to get in her front door when her phone rang and she wasn't quite following Emmett as she tried to juggle her phone, the pile of books she was carrying and get the key into the lock.

"To get Lucy from school." Emmett answered causing Bella to pause as she realised what he was saying.

"Are you seriously telling me you've let Edward leave the flat, by himself and walk all the way to the school?" She asked for clarification and when Emmett confirmed that he had she dropped her books and stared at the phone for a minute wondering at Emmett's stupidity.

"What did you do to upset him so badly and why wouldn't you follow him? You do realise that every time he's been hurt he's been by himself?"

"We got into an argument and it would only have made it worse if I'd followed him."

"What was the argument about?" Gathering her books back up she managed to get the key in the lock and into the house where she dumped her books onto the kitchen table and ran up to her room to find her car keys.

"It's probably better you ask him. I'm not sure he'd want me to say." Emmett responded miserably.

"Urgh fine. I'll go get him and Lucy in the car and bring them back here if Edward wants. I swear if anything happens to him I'm telling Esme and Lucy it's all your fault."

"I know it's my fault. I just wanted him to tell me what was wrong."

"Did he?"

"Not really no. See if you have any more luck than me. All I did was make him angry."

"Ok, I'll see what I can do. I need to go now, I can't find my car keys. I'll text you when I know he's ok." She told him before he said goodbye and they both hung up.

Ten minutes later and her room looked like a bomb had gone off somewhere in it but she had her car keys in hand so she hurried back down the stairs and out of the door, thankful that she still had both car seats in the back of Poppy from when Lucy had stayed over as Renee hadn't needed her one since.

She reached the school twenty minutes early as she had been home with enough time to walk there not expecting to need the car. Knowing that Edward most likely wasn't up to the walk he'd decided to take and not seeing him by the gates she didn't park and instead drove on in the direction of his flat. Just before she was half way there she spotted him walking along the pavement slowly so glad the road was empty she made a U-turn and pulled up just in front of him. He looked up, recognizing the distinctive sound of Poppy's engine and not at all surprised to see Bella there. She leaned over and pushed open the passenger door so he climbed in not even attempting to argue that he didn't need the help.

"Emmett called you didn't he?" He asked as soon as he'd got the door closed and his seatbelt fastened.

"Yeah, he said he screwed up." She answered and was glad at that moment that Emmett had called her. Edward was out of breath and back to looking unwell again. He might have made it to the school but she doubted he'd have fared very well on the way home. Edward didn't comment on what Emmett had said and instead just leant his head against the window and closed his eyes as Bella starting driving again. He was glad Emmett realised he'd messed up but it didn't change what he'd said or thought. He was still furious with his brother even if the exhaustion which had quickly over taken him had taken the edge off it.

Bella left him to his silence as she drove them back to the school and parked nearby. As it got closer to the bell ringing Edward seemed too content resting against the window so she told him to stay where he was while she went to find the girls. Considering he didn't even try to argue with her she guessed he had to be feeling pretty bad. It didn't take long for the girls to spot her once the bell rang and she could see they'd both noticed Poppy parked a little further down the road but it was Lucy who questioned her after looking around.

"Where's Uncle Emmett?" She asked beginning to look worried when she couldn't see him or his car.

"He's not here Luce, your daddy came to pick you up today. He's with Poppy right now and you're both coming over to our house for a while." She explained. Lucy didn't say anything as Bella lead them over to the car but she could see her trying to work out what had happened. It wasn't until Bella was helping them both into their seats that Lucy caught sight of Edward and everything clicked into place for her.

"What did Uncle Emmett do?" She asked looking between Edward and Bella before settling her gaze on him. He showed no response to her question alerting everyone to the fact he'd fallen asleep.

"He said some things he shouldn't have but everything's ok. Your dad just needs a little time to calm down." Bella tried to explain but it didn't settle her as she continued to stare at Edward.

"Is Daddy ok?"

"He's just a little tired from walking here. He'll be fine a bit so no worrying."

"Promise?" Lucy asked quietly so Bella turned around in her seat so she could hold eye contact with her.

"Everything is fine Lucy. We're going to go back to my house and while you guys play I'll try and help your dad and uncle sort things out. It's just a silly argument I'm sure, like when Anna and I fall out." She tried to reassure her and with her words echoing something Edward had said to Lucy himself she relaxed a little.

"You fall out a lot." She commented making Bella smile a little.

"Yes we do but it never lasts long does it?" She asked and Lucy shook her head and looked to Anna who agreed as well so she slowly smiled too. Happy that Lucy was ok Bella started Poppy up and they headed for home.

When they got there Bella let the girls run ahead of them, Anna with her keys so they could get into the house while she woke Edward. He'd remained asleep all through the drive and Bella helping the girls out of the car so she went around to his side and opened the door.

"We're here." She told him while poking his leg and was relieved when he woke quickly. Seeing where they were he got out but his trip into the house and through to the kitchen was slow and unsteady making Bella glad she'd sent the girls in ahead of them so Lucy didn't see. They had just enough time for Edward to get settled in one the seats at the kitchen table before the girls appeared now minus their bags, coats and shoes. Lucy headed straight for Edward who smiled and lifted her up onto his knee letting her hug him as he asked how school had been.

Edward managed to keep smiling through the girls' drinks and biscuits but as soon as they ran out of the kitchen to go and play he sank his head down onto his arms that were folded on top of the table.

"Feeling rough?" Bella asked as she joined him, sitting a cup of tea in front of him and keeping hold of her own one.

"Yeah, thank you for picking me up. Walking out really wasn't one of my better ideas." He responded lifting his head up just a fraction so he could look at her. He was glad Emmett had called her as he'd known he was making a mistake halfway down the flat block stairs when he'd got out of breath but had been too angry to admit defeat. The rest of the walk had been terrible as his fear of being caught by James had kicked in, forcing him to walk faster than he could really manage and he'd hated every second of it. Now the relief of being safe was overriding his nerves at being around Bella after his weekend of over thinking and Emmett's comments. The exhaustion had also extinguished his anger to some extent though he was sure if it was Emmett who had picked him up and not Bella that it would have remained full force. For all he wanted to hate Emmett though he couldn't help but be grateful that he'd called Bella.

"Why did you do it?" Bella asked, she knew Emmett had angered him but surely he had to have known that walking to the girls' school wouldn't have gone well.

"I had to get out of there and away from Emmett."

"What did he do exactly?" The curiosity was beginning to get to her and she couldn't help but ask.

"He brought up some stuff I'd rather he'd left well alone and let me know just what they all think of me." He muttered, dropping his head back down onto his arms but maintaining eye contact.

"Like what?" She blurted before realising he probably wouldn't want to talk about it, "I'm sorry, you don't have to answer that."

"It's kind of a long explanation." He responded, torn between wanting to keep it all hidden for fear she'd think exactly the same as Emmett obviously did and wanting to tell her so she'd really know him.

"We've got plenty of time and it might help to be able to rant at somebody." Bella commented seeing his indecision. She'd wanted him to open up and she really didn't want him to back away again. He just looked at her for a moment before sighing and sitting up so he could grab hold of his tea.

"I didn't know anything about Lucy until she was five months old. When her mother turned up at my parent's house with her I had no idea what was going on. I didn't even know who she was, I recognized her face from school but I couldn't put a name to her straight away. My dad took that to mean that I'd been with so many girls I couldn't remember them all and chucked me out. In reality as far as I knew I hadn't even kissed a girl, never mind slept with one. I know when it must have happen but I still have no recollection of it, all I know was it was at a party and I must have ended up drunk for that to have happened. I stupidly thought that Emmett understood that but apparently not. He was always the most popular kid in school and he had a bit of a reputation for going through all the girls in his year. I automatically inherited that reputation when I had my growth spurt earlier than the other boys in my year and the girls started to take notice of me. They all seemed to think that just because I was his brother and hung around with him that I was just like him. A few of them asked me out at first but I wasn't interested and turned them down so instead they started up all kinds of rumours of who I'd asked out or kissed or whatever as part of some kind of weird popularity contest. I really had no interest in any of it but just let it all go figuring it was easier than trying to deny any of it and they all left me alone, apparently happy with their stories. I always assumed the people that mattered knew who I really was yet it turns out Emmett thought all my absences at breaks and lunch times were spent chasing girls when I was actually in the music department practising piano by myself. Maybe it shouldn't make me so angry but it really does. He should have known me better than that."

"No I can see why that would get to you. How did that even come up?" She was stunned Emmett would be so stupid as to say something like that to him and was surprised Edward had actually told her about it. At least it explained a little as to what happened with Lucy's mother and it was obvious she was nothing to be worried about as far as pushing things forward with Edward went. The actual circumstances of Lucy's arrival mystified her but it wasn't the time to question any of that, finding out what was wrong at that moment was more important.

"He's got this stupid idea into his head that you like me as more than just a friend. Says he heard you speaking to Rosalie but don't worry, I know he must have misunderstood whatever he thought he heard. Anyway, he wouldn't drop it so I was trying to explain that I wouldn't know what to do with a girlfriend in an attempt to shut him up and well, he got stuck on the fact I have Lucy..." He trailed off as his face flushed at what he'd just admitted. It was surprisingly easy to talk to Bella and while everyone else's attempts at making him talk had just angered him it felt strangely good to let out was bothering him to her but he still hadn't really meant to divulge quite that much. The fact he was keeping his eyes down in an attempt to stop Bella seeing his embarrassment meant he totally missed the way Bella blushed when he told her what Emmett had said.

If Emmett had been there Bella would have killed him. She couldn't blame Edward for wanting to get away from him so much. He shouldn't have told him what she'd said, even she'd known Edward would not have reacted well to that. When he ran from just a friendly affectionate gesture there was no way he would have been open to hearing what Emmett had told him so bluntly. Now that he had though the way Edward just dismissed it made her sure it would probably only end up doing more damage if she let him continue to believe Emmett was making it up so any ideas she'd had about taking things slow were ruined. She was going to have to try to fix the mess Emmett had created and hope it didn't ruin any chance she had at a future with him.

"Edward why do you think what Emmett said was a 'stupid idea'?" She asked quietly, silently cursing the way her blush intensified with her words. They caught Edward's attention though as he looked up and stared at her wondering why she'd even ask that.

"Well it is. I mean why would you? I'm a single parent with trust issues, a very low income and no child free time who apparently can't even look after himself, add to that the trouble I've had recently and I'm surprised you even want to be friends with me."

Bella stared at him absolutely horrified that he could think that. There was so much more to him than just being Lucy's dad and she couldn't let him keep believing that even if it did make him run a mile.

"Edward you're a brilliant dad to Lucy, that's not a negative to hold against you, it's something to admire. Anyone who's been through what you have would have problems trusting, that's understandable and the trust would come with time. As for how much you earn? Anyone who was more concerned with that than the amazing man you are wouldn't be worth your time. Emmett was right. He did overhear me and Rosalie and I did say that I liked you because I do. I know you're probably not in the right place to hear that and I'm not expecting anything to change but I can't let you keep believing you're not worth someone caring for you. You're the most amazing, beautiful, caring, selfless and inspiring person I've ever met."

Edward couldn't believe what he was hearing. He'd never dreamed Emmett could be telling the truth but he could see nothing but honesty in Bella's eyes as she continued to hold his gaze. She was the darkest shade of red he'd ever seen on her before but she wasn't backing down.

"Do you really mean that?" He asked quietly. He could feel his heart beating furiously at the thought of what could happen knowing how she felt. Now he knew the possibility was there he wanted it more than he ever had before. It would be so much harder hiding his own feelings when he knew she was doing the same.

"Yes, I really do." She answered reaching over and taking hold of his hand. He stared at their joined hands as he laced his fingers through hers and let the wonderful feeling of her skin against his flood through him. This was not the way he'd expected his afternoon to go. As he looked back up to her hopeful face he couldn't help the next words that spilled out.

"I like you too."

Bella broke out into a wonderful smile at his words and he found himself tugging her closer with their joined hands without even realising what he was doing. He pushed his chair back from the table causing Bella to end up stood between his legs as he remained sitting. He was so nervous but at the same time it felt right to be holding her hand and pulling her close.

"I don't know what I'm doing." He admitted as she leant closer to him and his focus dropped from her eyes to her lips.

"Neither do I." She responded, searching his eyes for what he wanted. The urge to lean just that last bit closer and kiss him was so strong that when she realised where his gaze had gone it was almost impossible to stop it but she had to know for sure.

"Can I kiss you?" She asked hesitantly pulling his gaze back up and she could see something like fear flash through his eyes before it changed to resolve and he nodded.

Edward sat frozen as Bella slowly closed the final distance between them. He wanted to kiss her so badly but he could feel the nerves that had returned increase along with his heart rate and he had to fight through the fear that coursed through him to remain still. He wanted this, it had to just be nerves at it being his first kiss that were making him feel sick. If he could just push through it he knew it would be better than he could ever imagine.

When she finally brushed his lips with her own he had a moment of triumph before the kitchen around them vanished to be replaced by a dimly lit room. Loud music roared through his ears as his head thumped painfully in time to the beat. The fear intensified as instead of the soft, smooth lips he'd been expecting they were sticky and tasted of alcohol and cigarettes. There were hands gripping his hair tightly, holding him in place as he tried to pull away. He felt sick and his head was spinning while his body was sluggish and unresponsive to his thoughts. As he tried to pull the hands out of his hair to get free his arms wouldn't lift far enough so he tried to push against the shoulders in front of him but there was no force to his movements. His mind was screaming no, that he didn't want this, that he had to get away but he couldn't do a thing to act on it.

As fast as the vision had come, it left, leaving him back in Bella's kitchen with her but now that he could, he pulled away from the kiss and jumped out of his chair, stumbling back and knocking it over in the process.

"I'm sorry, I can't...I've got to go..." He stuttered, raking his hands through his hair and looking around the room wildly. He could still see the dimly lit room, his mind stuck firmly in what he was beginning to realise was a memory even though it was Bella's kitchen his eyes were seeing.

"Edward what's wrong?" Bella asked, scared by his reaction. His eyes were wide and glassy while he'd passed pale and was well into green and his whole body was trembling. She'd done nothing she thought could cause that kind of reaction after all it was him that had pulled her close and he'd nodded his agreement to her kiss. She was sure he'd wanted it just as much as she had.

"I've got to go...I can't stay...it's not ...I've just got to go..." He continued to ramble before suddenly bolting past her. She chased him into the corridor calling out for him to wait and tell her what was wrong but he didn't stop and fled straight out the front door leaving Bella to stare at the door as it slammed shut in her face and wonder what had gone so wrong.

That was definitely not how she'd imagined their first kiss to go. She didn't know what she'd done but the gravity of the situation didn't fully hit her until she turned around to see a tearful Lucy standing on the bottom step, staring at her and the closed front door.

"Where did Daddy go?"


	28. Chapter 26 Reluctant Memories

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

_**WARNING: If you do not want to read further details on the theme that was alluded to in the last chapter please skip the part in the middle that's in italics. It should still make sense without it. It's not hugely graphic but may be upsetting.**_

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><p><em>It takes all these memories,<em>

_To be turned around and lived again,_

_To go on and on and on and on._

_Last Conversation by Fightstar_

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><p><strong>Chapter 26 – Reluctant Memories<strong>

Edward didn't make it past the small wall that enclosed the front of Bella's house before he remembered Lucy was inside and he couldn't leave without her. Unable to go back in and face Bella he sank down onto the wall, leaning over so his head was between his knees as he rebelled against the images in his head. He felt faint and sick as his world crashed down around him. He'd always known he was missing something when it came to the night Lucy was conceived but with his lack of memory of that night he'd been all too willing to just let it go and focus on the present instead. No one had ever really questioned him on it too greatly so he hadn't needed to think about it until recently. It had never even occurred to him that anything sinister had happened having just assumed he'd got caught up in the party like most teenagers would and the drink had gone to his head. While he'd always known what had happened had to have been a mistake, it had never once occurred to him that it hadn't been consensual.

Now with the newly remembered memory playing vividly in his head he couldn't escape the fact that he hadn't wanted it, there was nothing in the memory that indicated he'd wanted anything to do with her. She was holding him to her, her grip tight and painful while he tried unsuccessfully to push her away. He wished so badly that the memory had stayed hidden or that he could forget it but now that it was there he knew he'd never be able to forget it again. It was only a flash but he knew what it meant and he'd live the rest of his life knowing what he'd been too weak to prevent from happening to him.

At least it explained his fear and probably why he'd never been interested in anyone before Bella. Considering how long that memory had been concealed his subconscious must have been working constantly to avoid any situations that would trigger it but Bella had overridden it and that, along with Carlisle and Emmett's insistent questioning had allowed it to break free. He hoped the rest of that night would stay hidden as he was certain he wouldn't ever want to relive it yet there was a part of him that needed to know everything that had happened.

He didn't know how long he'd been outside but the cold was beginning to get to him as he'd left his jacket inside in his haste to get out. Glancing back to the house his head swam again as he realised he'd have to face Bella with the new found knowledge fresh in his mind. How could he do that knowing what had happened? After everything she'd just said to him he now knew how undeserving of her praise he really was. He'd have to tell her, he couldn't let her keep on thinking he was something he wasn't. He was a weak, pathetic excuse for a man. He could just imagine how Bella would take back all the wonderful things she'd said the instant she found out and he wasn't ready to face that. Only his life could be so cruel as to give him the one thing he really wanted and then to taint it and snatch it back almost instantly. She probably already hated him for how he'd pulled away and ran out on her. As he stared at her front door he didn't know if he could even find the courage to go back inside.

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><p>Bella didn't know what to say to Lucy. She didn't know where Edward had gone, why he'd left or when he'd be back but she had to do something to comfort the upset little girl stood in front of her. Praying that what she was about to say was the truth she moved over to where Lucy stood and lifted her up, letting her cuddle against her and bury her face into her neck.<p>

"He's just gone outside to get some fresh air." She murmured, "I'm sure he'll be back soon."

"Why did he slam the door?" Lucy's quiet voice let Bella know that she'd seen Edward's exit and left her at a loss as to what to say. If she'd seen him run out with Bella calling after him then she'd know something was wrong.

"I don't know Luce but he'll be back to get you." She replied knowing that no matter what was wrong, Edward would not just leave Lucy behind. Something about their kiss had freaked him out but she was almost certain when he calmed down a little he'd be back for Lucy even if he didn't want to see her again. He would not leave his daughter behind if he had a choice about it.

"I want my daddy." Lucy cried as her tears finally spilled over. She wasn't comforted at all by Bella's words as he'd never left anywhere like that without her before.

"I know sweetheart but please don't cry, he'll be back." Bella reverted to using one of the nicknames for Lucy Edward was so fond of in an attempt to calm her before trying to distract her. "Why did you come downstairs, was something wrong?"

"We heard something bang, I wanted to check Daddy was ok." She answered and after a moment of confusion Bella realised they must have heard the crash of Edward knocking his chair over.

"He isn't hurt." She assured Lucy, "It was just a chair that got knocked over."

Lucy didn't respond verbally to that but her grip around Bella's neck tightened making her wish that Edward would return even more, she was out of her depth and had no idea what to do to comfort Lucy. She was too bright to be fooled by her empty statements and she knew her dad far too well to take him running out of a house and leaving her behind for anything less than what it was.

When she suggested Lucy go back upstairs to play with Anna while they waited for Edward to come back Lucy just shook her head and refused to give up her grip on Bella so she called up the stairs for Anna to come down and join them. Taking them through to the living room she let Anna choose what to put on the TV while she sat down with Lucy still cuddled into her.

Half an hour passed with no sign of Edward returning and Bella started to get really worried. She wanted to go out and find him but she couldn't leave the girls on their own and with no idea what was wrong or what kind of state he was in she didn't want to take them with her. Calling Emmett didn't feel like a good idea either as Edward had already run from him once and Esme and Carlisle would be working so she was going to have to hope he'd come back on his own soon.

It was another half hour before they heard the front door open and shut causing Lucy to finally let go of Bella as she jumped up and raced towards the door. Bella quickly scrambled to follow her and found her tightly held in Edward's arms. He was trying to reassure her he was ok and while he was smiling and trying to get her to smile Bella could see it was a mask. He was still trembling, whether that was from being outside for so long in just a t-shirt or for the same reason their kiss had caused it earlier she couldn't tell. His hair was sticking up in all directions once again, a sure sign he'd been running his hands through it a lot which she knew was something he did when uncomfortable or stressed. Lucy didn't seem to be buying it either but after a little more reassurance and a threat of tickling she finally relented and let him put her down.

When she left them to go back through to Anna in the living room, Bella and Edward remained stuck where they were, at opposite ends of the corridor with Bella searching his face for some sign of what was wrong while he kept his eyes down, refusing to look at her.

"I'm sorry." Bella blurted to break the silence.

"Why are you saying sorry?" Edward asked quietly with a tone that suggested he had no idea what she was saying. She took a step closer only for him to back up a step so the distance between them stayed the same.

"For whatever I did wrong." She answered only for Edward to shake his head.

"You didn't do anything wrong. It was all me." He replied still refusing to look at her.

"I don't understand. What happened?" She asked. He looked so dejected standing there and she wanted to comfort him but she didn't know what was wrong and when she tried to take another step closer to him he backed away again.

"I can't explain it. Not now. Just...it wasn't your fault, you did nothing wrong. I'm sorry."

"Edward talk to me please. I want to help but I don't know what's wrong."

"You can't help, it's just me. I'm no good for you. I'll call Emmett, get him to come pick us up." He stated while searching his pockets for his phone only he'd left it in his jacket so he came up empty handed.

"No, we should talk about this. I'll take you home when Mum gets here for Anna." Bella responded quickly. She didn't want him to leave like this, she needed to know what had gone so wrong and that he was ok. He really didn't look ok and as he finally looked up to meet her gaze she could see the closed off expression he used to wear constantly had returned.

"There's nothing to talk about. I'm sorry." He said blankly and the lack of emotion there scared Bella.

"But...what we said before? We kissed..." She started unsure of what she was saying but knowing she needed to say something.

"I'm sorry, that shouldn't have happened. I don't...I can't...I'm not right for you." Edward stumbled through his words and at the end of them Bella saw the mask crack and the pain it hid fill his eyes before he closed them tight and his hands fisted at his side.

"Why would you say that? It's not for you to decide what's right for me, that's for me to do and I've already decided. I want you Edward, I have done since the first time I saw you." She stated getting frustrated by his lack of any real answers and scared that he seemed determined to pull away. It couldn't be denied that something had gone very wrong when they'd kissed but they'd both wanted it and she didn't want to lose him before they'd even really given it a chance.

"You shouldn't want me, you wouldn't, not if you knew..." He muttered, the last few words coming out so quietly that Bella wasn't even sure if she heard them correctly.

"If I knew what? I already know all I need to know and it's you I want. Nothing else matters." She responded once again trying to move closer to him and this time he couldn't move back as he was already pressed against the front door. Bella hadn't expected the response that action received as he almost cowered away from her and the mask fell completely to be replaced by fear.

"Please don't, I can't do this, not now." He pleaded and taken aback by his reaction Bella backed away, watching him relax when she was out of touching distance again.

"What's wrong Edward? Was kissing me really that bad?" She asked feeling strangely hurt. Common sense told her that when he said it wasn't her he was telling the truth, that there was something else behind his odd behaviour but her feelings were getting in the way. All they took notice of was the fact he had run after they'd kissed and now seemed to want to be nowhere near her. It hurt even though she could see he was hurting too.

"No, you've no idea how much I wanted that. This is all me, I just can't. I need to go, I can't be here." He looked so broken at that moment and it tore Bella up. She wanted to know what was wrong but she couldn't stand to see him like that and her questions were just prolonging it.

"Do you still want to call Emmett or can you wait half an hour and I'll drive you?" She asked giving in with a sigh. She wanted to cry but she had to hold it together until he was home. There was no way she wanted to make him feel any worse than he already seemed to and though he was pushing her away, she was fairly sure he wouldn't want to be the cause of her tears. He was just too caring and selfless for that, he wouldn't be doing any of this to intentionally hurt her.

He agreed to wait, knowing it would have taken Emmett half an hour to get there anyway. Not wanting to be alone with Bella he chose to sit with Lucy and Anna in the living room while Bella pretended something needed doing in the kitchen. He hated how upset she'd looked as they'd talked but there was nothing he could do about it. There was no way he could pretend everything was fine, yet he wasn't ready to tell her what had happened. He still needed time to get his own head around it before he told anyone else and he couldn't let her get close to him until she knew. It wouldn't be fair to her. He just needed time to work out what to say.

In the mean time he worked on getting his face back under control so all Lucy would see was a pleasant, easy smile. There was no way she could ever find out what he'd recently remembered. He hadn't meant to scare her when he'd left the house, hadn't even realised she'd been standing there watching him leave. All he'd wanted was to get away from the images in his head, to run and hide and pretend nothing had happened. He would have even welcomed James at that moment as he wouldn't have to deal with his memories if he was unconscious. Now though he realised the problems his instincts had caused and he had to settle Lucy, convince her everything was fine. After that he'd work out what to do about himself.

The car ride home was awkward and quiet. Bella turned the radio on, but no one spoke, not even Lucy. She just looked between the two of them while Bella kept her slightly red eyes firmly on the road and Edward stared blankly out of the window. When Bella helped Lucy out of the car, Lucy was sure to hug her tightly and kiss her cheek before claiming hold of Edward's hand. Neither Edward or Bella said anything to each other but the longing look from Edward as Bella climbed back into the car sparked a tiny bit of hope in Bella's heart that all was not completely lost as she drove away.

Edward and Lucy watched Poppy until she was out of sight and then turned back to the flat block. Stealing himself for yet another awkward conversation, Edward lead them up the stairs and they were met by Emmett the instant they were in the flat.

"I'm so sorry." Was the first thing out of Emmett's mouth when he saw them and too tired, confused and upset to still be angry Edward just shook his head.

"It doesn't matter anymore, just forget it." He responded and Emmett watched on with confusion as Edward directed Lucy to go and get changed while heading for the kitchen. He'd expected more shouting, glares or at the very least the cold shoulder from Edward but all he saw in his brother was a poor attempt at being ok.

"Are you ok?" He asked warily after following him and was surprised when Edward shook his head rather than saying he was fine like normal.

"Not now." Was all he said and then Lucy reappeared, halting any other questions Emmett could have thought to ask. It was a strange evening to say the least. Emmett could see Edward was putting a lot of effort into smiling and chatting for Lucy and paying attention to her yet while she seemed to soak it up it looked almost over the top to Emmett and it gave him the impression that Lucy knew Edward was just pretending but was willing to believe the lie just because she wanted it to be true. He couldn't put his finger on what it was but something was wrong and not in the same way it had been before. Edward was even talking and acting civilly to him which was the last thing he'd been expecting after the way Edward had walked out earlier. The other strange thing about the evening was that neither of them mentioned Bella once, and Lucy usually never shut up about her if they'd spent any time with her.

When it reached Lucy's bedtime Emmett was even more stunned by Edward's behaviour when he declined her plea to stay with him and instead tucked her into her own bed and said he was going to be staying up a little later when she asked why she couldn't stay with him. The fact he was staying up settled her enough to stop her questions as she was just pleased he was feeling well enough to not need an early night for once as it was a sign he was getting better so she didn't argue.

Confused as to Edward's motivation for staying up late when he was sure he had to be tired and too scared to say anything that would start another argument Emmett sat uncomfortably in silence as Edward rejoined him in the living room once Lucy was asleep. They remained in silence for a while before Edward finally broke it.

"Do you remember the last house party I ever went to?" He asked taking Emmett by surprise and it took him a while to remember what Edward was referring to.

"I think so, it was that leaving do right? You didn't want to go but your friends talked you into it and I went along because I was bored?" He asked trying to remember it better. He'd been to so many parties they tended to merge together in his memories but Edward had only ever gone to a few, too scared to get caught by their father.

"Yeah, what do you remember about it?" It was an odd thing for Edward to bring up so Emmett stared at him a little, trying to work out where he was going with it. He looked uncomfortable as he fidgeted with the loose threads of the hole in the knee of his jeans.

"Not a great deal really, it wasn't very memorable, just a typical party." He responded slowly trying to work out what it was about that party he wanted to know. "Hang on, wasn't that the one you passed out at? I had to get Jasper and Peter to help me get you home as you were that out of it you couldn't even stand up on your own."

"Do you know how I ended up like that? Who I was with or anything?" With that question Emmett got an uneasy feeling. It seemed an odd line of questioning, especially so long after the event.

"Not really. I'm pretty sure you were with Jasper and Peter to begin with but I was off with people from my own year. It was only when it was finishing up that Jasper found me and told me they couldn't find you. When we eventually found you passed out on the sofa in the back room you were obviously drunk. We woke you up but when you tried to speak it was so slurred we couldn't understand you and you couldn't even stand on your own. I've no idea who got you to loosen up enough to drink like that, you were always so against it in case Dad found out and Jasper and Peter hadn't seen you for a couple of hours. You were lucky we managed to get you back home and into bed without Dad noticing really, if he wasn't such a heavy sleeper there was no way he would have missed the noise we made trying to get you upstairs."

"You're sure I was drunk?" Edward asked with a frown making the uneasy feeling Emmett had intensify.

"Well you were slurring, couldn't stand up or walk in a straight line and I'm pretty sure you would have fallen asleep on your feet if we hadn't kept poking you awake. What else could it have been? Where's this going Edward? Why bring up a party that happened years ago now?" The troubled expression on Edward's face didn't go away as he shook his head and stood up.

"It's nothing, don't worry about it. I'm going to bed." He announced before hurrying out of the room leaving Emmett no less confused and feeling like he was missing something important.

Edward crawled into bed, his head still reeling from everything he'd learnt that day. It hadn't all been bad, finding out Bella had feelings for him had been just as amazing as it had been terrifying but the memories her kiss had provoked over shadowed any joy he'd felt. For all he wanted to ignore them and try and forget all about it he knew he needed to know what had happened the rest of that horrible night which was why he'd found himself asking Emmett about the party. He hadn't been much help, not that he had really expected him to be. When they'd gone to parties they'd very rarely stuck together, Emmett had always used them as more of a hunting ground for girls while Edward had preferred to stick with Jasper and Peter in a quiet corner somewhere. He'd never really liked the party scene, his father wouldn't have approved and he'd always been worried he'd get caught so he'd only ever gone when people had really pushed him to.

Staying awake thinking about it wasn't going to get him anywhere, no other memories were coming to him so he had nothing else to go on and his thoughts were just going round in circles. Unfortunately he didn't want to close his eyes and sleep either as he was pretty sure nightmares were going to greet him the instant he did and he knew the memories would be far too vivid in that form, it really would be like reliving it. The nightmares were also why he'd insisted Lucy sleep in her own bed. He didn't want her there with him if he was going to be dreaming about that night and he thought there was a good chance that would happen. He really didn't want to see the rest of that night yet he knew he needed to. He had to know what had happened even if he didn't want to.

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><p><em>He was sitting in a crowded room, surrounded by people he didn't really know. Jasper and Peter were around somewhere as was Emmett though he hadn't seen any of them for a while. Contemplating whether or not he should get up and try to find them again or stay where he was until they found him he was brought out of his thoughts by one of the guys from his own year. He didn't really know him but he thought his name was Riley, it was his brother's party.<em>

_"This kind of sucks doesn't it?" He asked dropping down onto the sofa beside him and looking around. Edward nodded his agreement, the place was filled with kids from the years above, very few from his own and how he'd let himself be talked into coming he wasn't sure. Why Jasper and Peter had even wanted to come was a complete mystery._

_"Come on, I know what will make this better." Riley announced, standing up and grabbing hold of Edward's arm to pull him up as well. Once standing he was pretty sure Riley had been drinking as the abrupt movement seemed to make him sway slightly._

_"Thanks but I'm ok here." He tried to turn down whatever Riley thought was a good idea but he wasn't taking no for an answer as he kept hold of his arm and tugged him forward._

_"Don't be so boring, you're such a goody two shoes." Riley grumbled good naturedly as he dragged Edward through the crowded room and into the slightly quieter kitchen. Riley let go of him and Edward stood rubbing at his arm where he was sure Riley's grip would have left a mark on his skin while Riley started amassing paper cups, a bottle of cheap vodka and some cans of Irn Bru. Edward watched him dubiously as he mixed the things together before bouncing back over to him and shoving one of the paper cups into his hand._

_"Go on, you'll like it." He encouraged with a grin as he took a big gulp from his own cup. Edward stared into his and shook his head._

_"No thanks, I don't drink." He answered trying to sit the cup down on the units beside him but Riley reached out and grabbed his arm again to stop him._

_"Everyone drinks, come on, you don't know what you're missing till you try it."_

_"My dad would kill me if he found out." Edward stubbornly responded only for Riley to double over with laughter._

_"Seriously? He won't even know. It's just one little drink." He tried to persuade him, "Just enough to loosen you up a bit. Don't you want to have some fun for once?"_

_Edward couldn't help but think he didn't want to have Riley's kind of fun. It wasn't like he even had that much to do with him in school so he shouldn't have cared what he thought of him but he was still chuckling at him and muttering about him being such a boring, stuck up wimp. Eying the drink again he guessed Riley was right, one drink wouldn't really hurt. It was still early in the night so it wasn't like his dad would be able to tell if he did run into him once they got home._

_"Go on, you know you want to." Riley taunted, able to see the indecision on Edward's face as he stared into the cup at the orange concoction. Taking a sip of it Edward had to agree it didn't taste too bad, although he still preferred his Irn Bru without the added alcohol. Apparently happy that he'd won, Riley grinned and encouraged Edward to down the drink so he did, in the hope Riley would leave him alone._

_"Told you you'd like it." He announced gleefully before he turned to slip out of the kitchen. He stopped just before he was out of Edward's sight and grinned once more, "Have fun."_

_The room swirled and suddenly he was standing in a hallway. The music was still playing loudly and his head hurt. He felt kind of funny and just wanted to go home but he still couldn't find Emmett. He was leaning against a wall thinking it was oddly comfortable and he could just fall asleep when a girl with curly brown hair appeared in front of him. He thought she looked familiar but he couldn't place her, his head too fogged with sleep. Why he was quite so tired he had no idea but it was making it hard to remember things, like where his friends were and how he'd ended up in the hallway._

_"Hey, you ok?" She asked appearing concerned as he tried to focus his tired eyes on her._

_"Have you seen my brother?" He asked, just wanting to find him so he could go home and sleep._

_"Can't say I have. You're friends with Riley right? I think he introduced us earlier." She asked moving a little closer to him. He shrugged in response as they weren't what he'd call friends and he couldn't really remember what he'd done earlier. The girl studied him for a moment before smiling softly._

_"You look a little out of it. Had too much to drink?" She asked but the question confused him so he just shrugged again._

_"Do you want to go somewhere quieter for a while?" There were too many questions, he was still stuck on the last one so he didn't complain as she grabbed his hand and started leading him up the stairs. He was so tired all of a sudden and as she lead him over to a bed and pushed him gently onto it he had a real fight to stop his eyes from closing and sinking into it. She was right, it was quieter there and it helped his head a little even though he could still hear the music._

_He was startled from his thoughts when the girl suddenly appeared again only this time she was straddling his lap. The sudden movement made his head swim a little and he tried to move back but his body didn't seem to want to respond to his thoughts._

_"I've waited so long for this." She said before she crashed her mouth to his in a bruising kiss. Confused and startled once more he tried to move his head but she was quicker and her hands were threaded through his hair holding him in place. He tried to tell her he didn't want to kiss her but his protests were muted as she refused to relent her kiss. He felt panic well up in him as she ignored his muffled protests but it was strangely disconnected. He wanted to push her away but his arms wouldn't co-operate and when he finally did manage to lift them there was no strength to them. Powerless to stop it he let his eyes fall shut and tried to block the sensations out._

_When he next opened his eyes he was lying on his back on the bed. His shirt was open and his jeans gone while the girl was hovering over him, kissing down his neck and though he couldn't focus very well in the dim room with the beat of the music from the floor below thumping through his head he could see flesh tones where a pink halter top had been before. He could feel her hands touching him and his body responding but his mind was still rebelling. He didn't want any of this, he was certain of that. It was wrong. With each touch he felt sick, and as his body reacted against his wishes he still felt disconnected. It was like his mind was fighting a losing battle against his body, he was screaming for it to stop, to push the girl away and get out of there but he couldn't make himself move. He wanted to panic yet he was oddly calm. The only outward sign of the torment he was going through inside his head were the tears that slowly trickled down his cheeks. He didn't want this._

_As her hands slid further down his body he realised it wasn't just his jeans that were missing as he could feel her touch on the bare skin of his hips before it moved lower. When her hand wrapped around him his body reacted, only encouraging her to continue her unwanted attention. It didn't seem to matter that his mind was unwilling, his body was that of a fourteen year old boy who'd never been touched by anyone before and there was nothing he could do to stop the physiological response._

* * *

><p>Edward woke up covered in a cold sweat with the unstoppable urge to be sick. He rushed out of his bed, getting tangled in the covers and falling before scrambling up and barely making it to the bathroom and onto his knees in front of the toilet before his stomach emptied its contents. Tears burned his eyes as he collapsed against the floor where he was. There was no question now about what had happened to him, only the problem of how he was meant to deal with it.<p>

When Emmett woke up for getting Lucy to school the first thing he did was head to the bathroom to get ready. In his half asleep state he wasn't paying attention to where he was going and as he walked into the bathroom he tripped over something. Looking down to see what had been left on the floor he was instantly wide awake when he realised it was Edward. Kneeling down beside him he reached out to touch the bare skin of his neck as being tripped over hadn't stirred him and had Emmett scared. Glad to feel a strong pulse beneath his fingers he took in the cold clammy skin and the way he was laid out by the toilette and guessed he hadn't been feeling well in the night. Shaking him slightly he called his name and was relieved when with a groan Edward's eyes opened. He looked up at him for a moment before awareness came back into his eyes and he suddenly moved to lift himself back up as he retched over the toilette bowl.

"You done?" Emmett asked once he'd slumped back down to be leant against the bath. Edward nodded in response so Emmett moved closer and helped him to his feet. "Let's get you back to bed then. How long have you been feeling like this?"

"Most the night." Edward answered hoarsely as they made it slowly to his room. He'd had barely any sleep, always waking at the same point to be sick. In a way he was glad, he really didn't want to see the final moments of what had happened, the rest of it was bad enough. He'd spent the majority of the night in the bathroom, not bothering to try and make it back to his room only to have to run straight back.

"I'll call Carlisle and Esme, see if they can come over." Emmett suggested thinking Edward needed checking out and a bit of mothering to make him feel better.

"I'm not ill." Edward responded as he might have been in shock from the revelations of his nightmare but the sickness was more from disgust at what he'd let happen to him. He didn't think there was anything Carlisle could do for that.

"Then why are you sick?" Emmett questioned, pulling the cover that was twisted up on the floor back onto the bed as Edward laid down.

"Bad dreams." He muttered while Emmett took a seat on the end of his bed.

"What kind of bad dreams?" The uneasy feeling from the night before was back as he studied his little brother who at that moment looked nothing more than an empty shell. His skin was back to its deathly pale shade while his eyes were wide and glassy with dark circles beneath them.

"I remembered the night Lucy was conceived." He answered quietly before vaulting out of the bed again as the images associated with those words came back in full technicolour.

"Edward what..." Emmett started but he'd already left the room so he got up to follow him and found him in front of the toilette again.

"I'm guessing it's not a good memory." He commented to which Edward shook his head. He looked so miserable and Emmett didn't understand it. Even if it was a drunken mistake that he regretted it shouldn't have caused such a strong negative reaction.

"Surely it can't be that bad. I mean even if it was a drunken mistake or whatever, you had to have enjoyed yourself for a least some of it or else Lucy wouldn't exist." He commented out loud only to be even more confused when his words seemed to make Edward feel sick again.

"Don't, don't say that." He mumbled desperately. There was not a moment in the memories he'd discovered where he'd enjoyed himself. His body might have, but he'd had no control over it and his mind certainly hadn't. Seeing the way Emmett was staring at him apparently completely baffled by what was going on Edward doubted that anyone would even believe him if he told them what had happened. That kind of thing just didn't happen to boys and how was he meant to make anyone understand that he hadn't wanted it at all when as Emmett pointed out, he had Lucy.

"Ok then, go back to bed and we'll talk about this more when Lucy's in school. I need to go wake her up or we'll be late. I'll tell her you've caught a stomach bug or something and I'm still calling Carlisle." Emmett announced deciding that explanations would have to wait until they had more time. Maybe Edward would make a little more sense when he wasn't throwing up constantly and had had time to wake up properly. Edward didn't comment, just stood and made his way back to bed.

He could hear Lucy running around getting ready for school and Emmett stopping her from entering his room until just before they needed to leave. That turned out to be a smart move as, as soon as she saw Edward she came to a halt and just stared before running to him and throwing herself into his arms.

"I'm ok Luce." Edward told her, hugging her tightly then kissing her forehead.

"Uncle Emmett said your ill." She mumbled into his chest, "I want to stay with you."

"My tummy's just a little upset, I'll be fine in a while and I've got Emmett here to look after me, no reason for you to miss school sweetheart." He reassured her, pulling back from their hug and stroking her hair behind her ear. He was going to have to show Emmett how to tie it up for her at some point as the loose curls would just get in her way at school.

"I don't like it." She told him stubbornly, "Uncle Emmett upset you yesterday."

"He didn't mean to baby and I over reacted. I'll be ok, I promise."

Lucy sighed and relented, kissed Edward's cheek and climbed back off his bed before stomping over to Emmett and glaring up at him with her hands on her hips.

"Look after my daddy. Don't make him mad again." She demanded making Edward smile for the first time that morning and Emmett look a little scared. For such a tiny little person she could certainly be intimidating.

"I'll try my best not to make him mad and Carlisle and Esme are coming round to help look after him. He'll be in good hands Lucy." He told her and she kept her glare steady for a moment longer before it switched to a smile as she said goodbye to her dad and let Emmett heard her out of the flat.

It was barely ten minutes later when someone knocked on the door. Trying to ignore the flaring panic, Edward climbed out of bed knowing that it was probably Carlisle and Esme. Still cautious he kept the chain on the door before opening it slightly and peering around it so he could see who was standing there. Seeing Carlisle and Esme right beside him he released the chain and opened the door wider, glad that the panic dissolved and clutching at the comfort the hug Esme pulled him into offered. Once she let go of him he lead them through to the living room where he took up his usual spot on the sofa and Carlisle sat his black doctor's bag on the floor next to him before taking a moment to study him.

"Emmett said you've been sick." He stated and frowned when Edward nodded.

"Do you know what caused it?" He asked next and when Edward nodded again but didn't say anything his frown intensified and he reached forward to place the back of his hand against his forehead. "You don't have a temperature."

"I'm not ill." Edward repeated what he'd told Emmett earlier.

"What's wrong then sweetheart?" Esme chipped in, moving from the chair she'd chosen to sit in to the sofa next to him so she could take hold of his hand in between both of hers. Edward looked between them both trying to decide if he could tell them. Out of everyone they would probably be the most likely to believe him after how much Carlisle had questioned his original memories of that night but he didn't even know if he wanted anyone to know the truth. That was over ruled as he thought about it though as he still had questions that Carlisle might have been able answer.

"I remembered the night Lucy was conceived." He murmured quietly and as he watched the expression on Carlisle's face fall he realised he'd already guessed what Edward had only just learned. "You know don't you?"

"I have my suspicions from what you said before but what have you remembered?"

"I didn't want it but I couldn't stop it." He answered causing Esme to gasp and her grip on his hand to tighten.

"Couldn't stop it how?" Carlisle questioned trying to maintain the calm he'd perfected from many years of being a doctor. Edward needed them if what he suspected was true and that meant he needed to keep his emotions out of it for the time being even if on the inside he was seething and horrified that anyone could do that to his nephew and that no one close to him had even realised.

"I was so tired and I didn't have any control over my body. I tried to say no, to pull away but I couldn't move enough and she ignored me." He was starting to feel sick again as he thought about just how his body had reacted but he tried to ignore it and focus on the fact Esme was still holding his hand.

"Tell us exactly what you remember, right from the start." Carlisle encouraged and with Esme's continued comfort he started to tell them everything he could remember. Esme's grip on his hand was the only thing that kept him grounded as he spoke and prevented the need to sprint to the bathroom. When he faltered they both murmured words of encouragement and he managed to continue until they knew everything and Esme had pulled him into a crushing hug as he tried to stop himself from crying. It was just way too much for him to deal with.

"From what you've said, I'd say it sounds like you were drugged." Carlisle said once Edward seemed to have calmed down and he just nodded against Esme as it was what he'd wanted Carlisle to confirm.

"Is that why he couldn't remember any of it for so long?" Esme asked and not quite as good at controlling her emotions as Carlisle, tears appeared in her eyes as what Edward had told them sank in but she managed to hold them back so Edward wouldn't notice.

"Most likely, the drugs would initially have caused amnesia and then it probably stayed hidden as a defence mechanism. Did something trigger the memories or did they just appear?" Carlisle answered her before turning his attention back to Edward who blushed slightly before answering.

"Bella kissed me and then I wasn't in her kitchen anymore but that bedroom." He answered miserably. He wished it could have chosen any other moment but then to reappear. He'd probably never get another chance to kiss her and now the one chance he had had to experience it had been ruined.

"Oh Edward, you poor boy. What happened with Bella?" Esme asked, horrified that something that should have been so good had been ruined for him. It was so unfair.

"I ran out, I couldn't stay there. She must hate me now."

"Honey you need to tell her what happened. I'm sure she'd understand." Esme suggested in the hope he wouldn't give up on Bella. She could see how badly the new revelation could damage any chance the pair had if Edward didn't trust Bella's feelings enough to think she could see past what had happened.

"I know, I just couldn't do it then." He looked so dejected as he spoke that Esme knew his reasons for why Bella needed to know were different to the ones that really mattered.

"Edward none of what happened was your fault. The only reason Bella needs to know is so she can understand why you ran. She cares a great deal for you and this won't change that." She said sternly in the hope he'd take in her words.

"You might keep getting flashbacks when in certain situations as well so she really does need to understand where your reactions are coming from if you do intend to pursue a relationship with her but Esme's right. If Bella really cares for you, which we all believe she does, then this won't change her feelings." Carlisle agreed with his wife, seeing exactly what she was seeing in his face.

"She's not going to want anything more to do with me after this. It was a miracle that she did before." Edward argued quietly, "The only reason I have to tell her is because it wouldn't be fair to let her believe I'm something I'm not, she deserves so much more and I don't want her to waste her time on me."

"Edward don't say that!" Esme scolded, she knew it was what he'd been thinking all along but hearing him say it was heart breaking especially as it seemed he wasn't taking any notice of what they were actually telling him.

"Why not? It's true." He muttered sadly.

"No it's not, it couldn't be any further from the truth." Esme continued to argue even though it was falling on deaf ears. Nothing they could say would change his mind.

"You're wrong. I let her do that to me, I was that weak and pathetic I just lay there and tried to blank it out rather than fight. Hell, I've spent years blocking it all out! I don't even know how to deal with it now and as you all like to point out I can't look after myself. I ended up in hospital, having to rely on someone else to take care of my daughter because I couldn't keep myself safe and my parents' are too ashamed of me to have anything to do with me. I can't even kiss Bella without freaking out and running away. She doesn't need someone like that dragging her down. She's so much better than that." He argued as dwelling on the new revelations only highlighted all the old faults he'd previously had to be sure he could never have a relationship with Bella. He'd been so stupid to ever think for even just a second that he actually had a chance with her, even before he'd remembered what had happened with Lucy's mother.

"Edward stop. I don't ever want to hear you talk about yourself like that again, do you hear me? You didn't 'let' that girl do anything, you were drugged and by the sounds of it with a pretty strong dose. There wasn't anything you could have done once that drug was in your system and that wasn't due to any weakness in you. If it had been Emmett he wouldn't have been able to fight either. As for being attacked, I assume you aren't going out looking for fights and you can't be blamed for someone else's determination to hurt you. Your parents are the ones who should be ashamed, we've gone over that before and you are not weak Edward, your one of the strongest people I've ever known. You've been through so much yet you're still here and you've managed to do an incredible job at raising Lucy. You just have to look at her to know what a good person you are. Bella would be lucky to have you and I think she knows that."

Carlisle's speech was enough to make Edward's tears flow again. It was like what Bella had said to him before everything had gone so wrong and he just couldn't understand how everyone else could see anything worth caring for in him. It just didn't make any sense to him, even the comments about Lucy. He always used to feel proud of himself when he thought of her, but recently all he'd been doing was letting her down. If it wasn't for Emmett and Bella he knew that she'd be suffering. He couldn't care for her by himself and he just kept upsetting or worrying her. He was failing her despite what Carlisle and Bella said. As Esme held him, murmuring words of comfort and endearment to him it felt like his whole world was caving in on him again and no amount of well meaning speeches could stop that. He wasn't who he'd always thought himself to be anymore. He was just the screw up his parents' believed him to be.

Emmett arrived home to see a visibly upset Edward still wrapped in Esme's arms while Carlisle was kneeling on the floor in front of them looking agonized. Having just left a rather distraught looking Bella by the school gates he was getting impatient to know what was going on.

"Does somebody want to tell me what's going on yet? Bella looks almost as bad as you do Edward and I'm fairly sure that's got something to do with you." He announced causing Carlisle to stand up and try to usher him out of the room as Edward pulled out of Esme's arms with an expression on his face that would have been more at home on someone who'd just been stabbed.

"What's wrong with Bella?" Edward asked before Carlisle had managed to shove Emmett into the kitchen. He sighed guessing they'd have to get that out of the way before he could talk to Emmett and stop him from saying anything else damaging.

"I don't know, just like I don't know what's wrong with you. No one tells me anything! She just looked like she hadn't slept and had been crying, red puffy eyes, messy hair, mismatched clothes. She was asking after you again."

Thinking Emmett had said enough Carlisle shoved him in the direction of the kitchen before turning back to the sofa where Edward was now resting his head in his hands while Esme rubbed his back trying to tell him it would all be ok.

"Do you mind if I tell him?" He asked knowing that Emmett was just going to keep putting his foot in it if he didn't know what was going on. He seemed to have a knack for saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. Edward lifted his eyes up to stare at Carlisle before he nodded thinking that Emmett probably did need to know and at least he wouldn't have to say it all again if Carlisle did it.

"Everything will be fine." Carlisle tried to comfort him before disappearing into the kitchen. They hadn't been gone that long before the strangled cry and loud crash announced that Carlisle had plunged straight into the explanation. Esme noticed Edward starting to tremble then and tried to hug him again only for him to pull away as Emmett charged into the room, blood dripping down from his right hand that he was holding against his chest. Carlisle chased after him but Emmett didn't seem to care as he stopped in front of his brother and sank down to his knees.

"I'm so sorry. I can't believe I let that happen to you. I'm so so sorry." He started to ramble and Edward stared at him in confusion as tears started to appear. He had never seen his big brother cry before.

"It wasn't your fault." He mumbled but Emmett didn't want to hear it.

"I was there! I should have been keeping a better eye on you or something. They shouldn't have been able to do that." Emmett ranted.

"It wasn't anyone's fault but the person who spiked the drink and the girl. Now let me look at that hand." Carlisle commented trying to pull Emmett's hand away from his chest so he could get a look at it.

"What did you hit?" Edward asked mildly curious and hoping to get Emmett's mind off apologizing to him.

"The kitchen wall. There might be a hole in it now but I'll sort it out." He responded a little sheepishly as he looked away from where Carlisle was prodding his hand and to Edward who he was surprised to find was smiling a little. Emmett's attention was snapped right back to Carlisle however as he forced him to flex his fingers making him hiss in pain.

"Come on, we need to get this cleaned." Carlisle commented as there were flecks of plaster, dust and paint imbedded in the grazes. Emmett sighed but let Carlisle lead him back through to the kitchen leaving Esme and Edward alone again. She looked to him, a little lost as to what to say but seeing how worn out he looked she slid along the sofa a little than patted her lap.

"Lie down for a while, you could do with some rest." She suggested and deciding she was probably right Edward took the invitation and laid down with his head resting on her lap. Once he was settled she started to run a hand through his hair and as she'd hoped, it had the same effect as it had the last time she'd done it so it wasn't long before his eyes slid shut.

* * *

><p>Edward stirred awake to the sound of voices around him. Not wanting to be faced with more questions he didn't open his eyes and pretended to be asleep letting him hear what was being said. When he realised what they were talking about he wished he hadn't woken up, he didn't want to think about anything to do with what they were saying and he certainly didn't want to start wondering about the answers to the questions they were raising. He'd already got way too much to deal with without adding something else to worry about.<p>

"It doesn't make sense, it sounds like it was well planned, if she didn't want a child why didn't she take precautions so she wouldn't fall pregnant? And if she did want the child, why would she give Lucy away when she was five months old? We're missing something, I'm sure of it, it just doesn't make any sense." Carlisle said.

"She could have been drunk and forgotten?" Emmett suggested.

"Then why not abort, or give the baby up when she was born? Why wait five months?" Carlisle countered.

"Maybe she thought she wanted her, then when she discovered how hard looking after a baby is changed her mind?" Esme offered.

"Maybe, but surely she would have kept some kind of contact. He should have heard from her or something by now I would have thought. To just abandon a child like that can't be that easy." Carlisle argued.

"Probably didn't want to risk being around for when Edward remembered what happened." Emmett commented and even half asleep Edward could hear the venom in his voice.

"You could be right but I don't know, it just doesn't feel right and you need to work on that anger, it's not going to help Edward." Carlisle scolded.

"It will if I ever get my hands on the people who did this." He responded making Edward glad he hadn't given anyone any names. Emmett off on a revenge mission really wouldn't do any good, it wasn't like it could change anything that had happened anyway. All it would do would be getting Emmett in trouble.

"That wouldn't help anything. Violence is never the answer. We should talk to Jasper and was it Peter? He said they were there that night didn't he? Maybe they remember something about it." Esme suggested.

"I'm not sure if they'd know anything we don't already know, though I would like to know how Edward lost them. I think it was them who talked him into going in the first place." Emmett grumbled.

"Why would they do that? We should definitely talk to them." Carlisle responded.

"Probably so they could go in the first place. The party was being held by someone in my year, Edward was one of the very few from his own year who were invited and I think Peter had a crush on a girl from the year above who would have been there. They used to have to talk him into going to a lot of things as because of who he is, it was always him that was invited."

"What do you mean 'because of who he is"?"

"I was popular at school as he was my brother and he hung around with me a fair amount he automatically got the same status. Stupid high school politics." Edward could just picture Emmett shrugging to go along with that comment; nothing about being popular had ever fazed him. He just went with it and had as much fun as he could along the way. Esme started up playing with his hair again then so he let himself enjoy the feeling and used it to block out the rest of their conversation having already heard enough as he drifted back to sleep.

When he next woke up he did feel a little better. The nightmares had stayed away for once and the extra sleep helped him feel a little more normal. The flat was a lot quieter as Carlisle had left for work and while Esme was still where she was when he went to sleep Emmett wasn't in the room anymore. Once she realised he was awake, Esme explained that Emmett had gone out to get some DIY materials to try and patch up the hole he'd made in the wall before Lucy came home. She tried talking to him a little more about Lucy's mother but he brushed off her questions by saying he wanted to shower. He just didn't have it in him to talk about it anymore right then, he just wanted to forget it all.

Unfortunately Esme seemed to think that wasn't for the best as when he returned freshly showered she tried to talk to him about it again, wanting to know how he was feeling. When he refused to talk about it any further she suggested they maybe ought to find a professional for him to talk to, to help him deal with everything that had been going on lately but he flat out refused.

When Emmett returned home after lunch Edward stayed in the kitchen to watch as he tried to fill the hole. It turned out to be quite an amusing activity as it was clear Emmett had very little clue what he was doing yet was determined to do a good job. It was certainly a lot more entertaining than anything on the TV.

As it got closer to the time Emmett would have to leave to get Lucy Edward found his thoughts drifting back to Bella, wondering if she'd be there waiting at the gates when Emmett got there. After his announcement that morning of how bad Bella looked, he wanted to see her for himself. He knew it was his fault and he wanted to fix it but he didn't know how.

By the time Emmett had called it a day with the wall and was gathering his things together to leave for the school Edward was back on edge, a fact Esme hadn't missed. When he caught her gaze he knew exactly what she'd suggest he do, she'd done nothing all day except try to get him to talk. He wasn't going to get any peace from her or his own thoughts until he did talk to Bella so even though the thought of talking about it all again started to make him feel sick he knew he had to try. Even if it did him no good he couldn't stand the thought of her being upset over him, he owed her a proper explanation. That was of course, if she even wanted to hear him out. After the way he'd behaved the day before he wouldn't blame her is she didn't want to see him again now she'd had time to think about it all.

"Can you ask Bella to come over later?" He blurted before he changed his mind as Emmett was saying goodbye causing him to stop and smile a little.

"Sure, you know you could just ring her and ask her yourself though?" He teased but Edward didn't want to hear the rejection in person if she had rightfully decided he wasn't worth her time. It would be easier if Emmett just came home and told him she didn't want to come. In a way it would even be a relief as then he wouldn't have to work out what to say to her.

Bella surprised him once again though. When Emmett and Lucy arrived home Emmett happily announced that Bella would be round shortly. Hearing that Esme decided she'd take Lucy and Emmett out for dinner, giving Edward and Bella time to talk alone. It took a bit of arguing before Lucy accepted that though as she didn't see why Edward and Bella couldn't go with them but she did eventually agree to go without them after Esme promised her ice cream. They waited until a nervous looking Bella arrived as Lucy wanted to say hello and get a hug from her and then they left.

"Hey, thanks for coming over." Edward said a little awkwardly while Bella fidgeted and smiled unsurely from the chair she was perched on the edge of. He could see what Emmett had commented on earlier, she did look tired and even though she'd got her hair tied up in the messy bun she often had it was messier than usual. He didn't like it, he was so used to seeing her smiling, cheerful and slightly crazy, it seemed wrong for her to be anything else.

Bella had no idea what to expect as she sat there, Emmett had been acting oddly and wouldn't explain what he'd done to his bandaged hand and had just said Edward had asked her to come over. There was no way she could have said no but she was apprehensive as to what Edward would want to say to her. Considering the way he'd acted the day before, then Emmett's strange demeanour that afternoon she was pretty sure something major was going on, and she wasn't entirely sure she wanted to know what it was. Unfortunately, if she wanted to remain friends with Edward or hope for a relationship with him then she had a feeling she needed to know so she decided they may as well skip the small talk and get right into it. It wasn't going to be pleasant either way so there was no point dragging it out.

"What's going on Edward?"

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><p><em>AN - Incase anyone hasn't heard of it, Irn Bru is a Scottish fizzy drink, its bright orange and has a very unique taste which I'm not really sure how to describe but it does go very well with vodka (it was my drink of choice during my first year at uni). It's banned in America due to a colouring that's used, as its thought to increase the risk of cancer I think. I know you can get it in some other countries but I'm not sure where so I thought I'd explain it.<em>

_Once again thank you for all the reviews on the last chapter, they always make me smile :)_

_Second attempt at posting this, why when you want certain parts in italics does it decide to do the whole thing that way? It looked fine in the Doc Manager preview.  
><em>


	29. Chapter 27 Arms

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

AN - Bit of a shorter chapter today but I hope you like it :) The chapter title comes from the Christina Perri song Arms as that was what inspired a lot of it. Totally awesome song so if you've not heard it before, listen to it! 

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><p><strong>Chapter 27 – Arms<strong>

Edward didn't know what to say, having expected a little more time to work up to it but considering how nervous Bella appeared and how he was feeling sicker by the minute with just the thought of what they had to talk about she was right to jump straight into it.

"When we kissed yesterday...it wasn't you I ran away from. It...triggered some memories..." He started before trailing off as he was having difficulty getting the words out. She needed to know but now that it came to telling her he didn't want to do it. He didn't want to see the look on her face when she found out. It was much harder than telling Carlisle and Esme had been and he realised it was because even though he knew he couldn't have Bella he still wanted her more than anything. He didn't want to lose her.

"What memories?" Bella prompted after a moment seeing that Edward seemed to be struggling with what he was trying to say and wasn't volunteering anything more.

"Forgotten ones." He answered while lifting his gaze to meet hers and willing her to understand so he wouldn't have to say it. They'd only spoken about it the day before, surely she'd remember. He didn't think he could get the words out by himself.

"Forgotten ones?" She echoed a little confused. She could see from the way he was looking her that she was meant to understand what that meant but there were so many things that could be forgotten. As he nodded and continued to stare at her she tried to remember all the things they'd ever talked about before the conversation at her kitchen table the day before came to mind. "You mean with Lucy's mother?"

When Edward nodded and he started to look worried as he watched her she wondered what he was expecting her to say. What was there she could say? It wasn't really what she'd wanted him to think about while kissing her but she didn't know why it seemed to be such a big deal to him. Surely it shouldn't have made him want to run so badly or act so strangely now.

"Okay..." She eventually mumbled hoping he'd add something more to help her figure out what he was getting at as it was obvious she was missing something.

"It...it wasn't...consensual. I was... drugged." Edward eventually managed to spit out. The urge to run gripping him again as he waited for Bella to react to what he'd said. It took a moment for it to register but when it did her eyes went wide and her mouth dropped open as she stared at him.

"You were...raped?" That was what she thought he was telling her but she didn't want it to be. Just the idea of it was too horrible. The word itself felt weird on her tongue and she saw the way he winced as she said it.

Edward hated the way that word sounded and all the connotations that came with it but he nodded, dropping his gaze as he was no longer able to watch her reaction. He didn't want to see the disgust he was sure would be present in her eyes.

"Are you ok?" She asked knowing it was a stupid question but unable to think of anything else to say right then. If he'd had no memory of it before it had to have come as a shock and she couldn't even imagine trying to deal with something like that suddenly presenting itself. Edward didn't respond verbally but the slight shrug of his shoulders and the fact he still wasn't looking at her told her all she needed to know. He was far from ok.

"Have you talked to anyone else about this?" She wondered as his usual methods for dealing with things seemed to be to try and keep them to himself and ignore them till they went away. She was pretty sure that wouldn't work in this case and while she didn't really want to hear any more details as just knowing the gist of it was bad enough, if she was the only one he was willing to talk to she'd listen.

"Carlisle and Esme this morning. When I told them what happened yesterday they said I should talk to you but I was planning to anyway. It wouldn't have been fair not to." He commented quietly and while she was relieved he'd spoken to them, especially as Carlisle would be much better placed for helping him work through it, the rest of his comment made their kiss come back to the forefront of her mind and the realisation of what she'd done made her feel sick.

"You had no idea what had happened before yesterday?" She asked quietly just for confirmation.

"No, when I woke up the day after the party I couldn't remember any of it and felt really rough. I just assumed I'd gotten drunk and it was a hangover. I didn't think about it much after that and it wasn't until Lucy's mother left her with me that I knew anything had happened at all that night. Then there were other, more urgent things to be thinking about and I just never questioned it. I guess it was easier to just let it go and believe the easy explanation. Carlisle says the drugs would have caused the initial memory loss, after that it was probably a defence mechanism that made me avoid anything that would trigger them." He explained, still refusing to look at Bella but finding it easier to talk about something that wasn't directly connected to the actual memories.

"And me kissing you brought it all back?" She questioned and when he nodded in response she was surprised he even wanted to talk to her again. It was easy to see why he'd felt the need to run from her and keep his distance at the house. "I'm so sorry."

"Why do you keep saying that? None of this is your fault." Edward asked, his gaze snapping back to her face as he tried to figure out what she was thinking. It should have been him grovelling for forgiveness, yet she was sitting there looking close to tears as she apologized.

"It's not yours either. I'm just so sorry that I pushed you into kissing me, I knew it was too soon but you seemed to want it too." She answered sadly, hating that she'd inadvertently caused him pain. "If I'd known it would bring back those memories for you I would never have suggested it."

Edward stared at her not comprehending what she was saying. It sounded like she was apologizing for him remembering what he had yet that couldn't be right as it wasn't her fault he'd blocked them away for so long that they chose that moment to break free. She really wasn't making any sense.

"You're apologizing? For what I remembered?" He finally had to ask when she didn't appear to be attempting to say anything else.

"It was me that triggered them was it not?" She asked with a shrug.

"I guess..." Edward trailed off as he couldn't deny that it had been their kiss that had brought the memory back to him. He was so lost, this was not anywhere near the reaction he had been expecting.

"So I'm sorry." She responded like it made perfect sense.

"But...no...it wasn't your fault...and the way I ran out...I should be the one apologizing. Why aren't you angry with me?" He was so bewildered he just wanted to understand why she was still sitting there with him. It didn't make any sense.

"Angry? Edward why would I be angry with you? Sure it hurt a little at the time when you ran out like that and wouldn't talk to me but even then I could see you were hurting too. The only thing I've really been is worried about you." She explained hurriedly, starting to get a little worried again at Edward's lack of understanding. It was like he was unable to understand anything she was saying and while her thought processes didn't always come out in the most articulate of ways she was pretty sure she was still speaking in English.

"You shouldn't worry about me, I'm not worth it." Edward muttered making her stare at him in shock that he could say such a thing.

"How can you say that after everything I said to you yesterday? I meant it then and I still do now, that hasn't changed. Of course I'm going to worry about you when it's obvious something is wrong." She said, not sure whether to be offended at his disregard for her feelings or worried that he hadn't or couldn't understand them.

"How can _you_ say _that_? After what I just told you, you shouldn't even still be here." He answered miserably. He was still waiting for it to click for her, and this dragged out conversation would only make the moment where she realised how little he was worth and left so much more painful.

"Ok I'm lost. Why wouldn't I still be here? You've remembered a horrible event from your past, so what? I know it might make things a little more difficult but you're still you. You're still the guy who dotes on his daughter, lets a group of five and six year olds cover him in make-up just for their entertainment and volunteers to wear a plastic tiara just to make me smile. If you still want me around then I'm still here." She answered totally stunning Edward as he tried to get his head round what she was telling him. Considering what happened the day before she wasn't sure stressing how she felt about him was the best idea but just like then she couldn't stand to see him putting himself down and it was the only way she could think to get him to see sense. If he could just see what she saw in him then maybe he'd be able to see it too instead of the warped version of himself he seemed to see that was based on his own and other peoples' misconceptions.

"You're not...disgusted?" He asked, his voice trembling ever so slightly. He wanted to believe what she was saying so badly but it just didn't make sense.

"Of course not! God Edward how could you ever think that?" She was appalled he could think it yet it made it obvious why he seemed so confused by her responses. As he sat there looking so lost she wanted nothing more than to cross the room and hug him. Words didn't seem to be getting through but she wasn't sure actions were a very good idea either after what their kiss had caused. She really didn't want to unleash any more unwanted memories. Any contact from now on would have to be initiated by him.

"I don't...understand." Edward mumbled quietly deciding to just go with voicing what was in his head and see where that got them. All this confusion was beginning to give him a headache.

"You really don't do you?" Bella sighed before deciding somebody was going to have to do something and since she was the only one there it was going to have to be her. Edward couldn't go on thinking the way he was. Even if what she was going to say would be blunt and even maybe going over the line she had to at least try to get through to him. "What happened to you was outside of your control, it was a horrible, cruel attack much like the way you've been attacked recently. That one event does not define who you are. Not only that but you've taken something brutal and turned it into something amazing with Lucy and who you've grown to be. It's not surprising that you blocked the memory for so long but the fact you're now remembering it, while unfortunate, probably just means you're better placed to deal with it and that's because you've got people around you now who care about you and want to help. I know I don't know much about your life before Lucy but it's apparent from what you have said about how they reacted to her that you didn't have the support you needed then. Knowing what you've told me now, I'm not disgusted or repulsed or any other negative emotion you can think up. It doesn't change how I see you or how I feel about you, all it does is help explain things a little better, like why you pull away. What you've remembered may be terrible but you've got to stop dwelling on it, look at the good thing it gave you in Lucy instead and even Carlisle and Esme as you wouldn't have found them if it hadn't been for Lucy. If you can't see the good, then we'll just have to keep pointing it out for you. You can't keep taking responsibility for other peoples' bad behaviour. The only thing that would make me walk away from you is if you told me you didn't want me here."

"I do want you here." Edward responded after a moment thinking that she was one of the good things she was talking about as if Lucy hadn't made friends with Anna he wouldn't have taken the chance of getting to know her. He wasn't completely convinced by her way of thinking but if she was that determined to overlook everything and still want to be around him then he knew he'd be stupid to turn her away. A small part of him even agreed with what she'd said.

"Good, so how about I stay and make us some dinner?" Bella suggested, pleased that he wasn't just brushing off what she'd said and instead seemed to be thinking about it a little. It would take a while for him to stop thinking of himself the way he was but hopefully she'd made a start in getting him to question it a little. Someday he had to see what an amazing person he was and if she could help him get there she would. For now though she thought he'd probably had enough of talking.

"Only if I can help." Edward agreed, managing to find a smile which only grew when Bella returned it. She always seemed to make him feel better and that day was no different, now he'd got passed the hard part and she was still there he was all too happy to change the subject for a while and try and have some fun. He knew they'd probably have to revisit it all at some point but he needed a break which she seemed willing to provide. She was the first person who didn't seem to be trying to make him talk about everything and he was grateful for it.

"Come on then, let's go see what you've got left in the kitchen." She commented as she moved through the living room only for Edward to reach out and catch her hand as she passed him.

"Thank you." He murmured before shocking them both when he pulled her further in for a hug.

"You're welcome." She responded even though she wasn't entirely sure what he was thanking her for. When he didn't instantly pull back from the hug like she'd expected, she gingerly returned it before hugging him properly when he still didn't try to pull back. It felt too good for her to end it if she didn't have to.

When Edward finally did step back he was blushing slightly as he looked at her. He was still smiling but she could see he was nervous as he lifted a hand to run through his hair.

"Do you...do you still want..." He asked hesitantly waving his other hand between the two of them and guessing what he was asking she nodded. She wasn't sure it was the answer he was looking for after what he'd just discovered he'd been through but she wasn't going to lie to him especially not after the way she'd already tried to make it clear how she felt about him. He had to know that if he wanted her, she would be there. She didn't want him to ever doubt that.

"Do you?" She found herself asking in return when he didn't say anything straight away and appeared to be more thoughtful than scared. It made her wonder if he did still want something to happen between them like he had the day before but it seemed unlikely after what he'd remembered. Surely he wouldn't feel comfortable with the idea of a relationship after the way he'd been violated especially as the fact he'd only just remembered what had happened would no doubt make it feel like it happened recently, not five years ago. Truly expecting a negative response and already resolved to accept it and just be the friend he needed she was totally surprised by his answer.

"I think so...I just, I'm not...well with everything it might be awkward..." He trailed off not really knowing what he was saying anymore. He really didn't want to lead her on as he wasn't sure how it would go, whether Carlisle would be right about the flashbacks or not but he didn't want to lose her and if there was a chance he could do it, he wanted to try. If she could overlook all his faults then he could at least try to do the same and work on being the man she deserved as although he couldn't understand it, he seemed to be the man she wanted.

"Are you sure this is what you want? I don't want you to feel pressured into something you're not ready for just because of what I've said. If you just want to be friends it's ok." She told him unsure whether his hesitance was nerves or his urge to make everyone else happy at his own expense kicking in. She really didn't want him getting into something he wasn't ready for just because he thought she wanted it.

"I've wanted to be with you since the first time we talked. If you still want to, I want to try, it's just...Carlisle said I may get more flashbacks in certain situations and I don't want to lead you on." He answered, mumbling the last sentence and dropping his gaze to the floor. Bella reached out to take hold of his hand and squeezed it gently to make him look at her again.

"Of course I still want to and we can take things as slow as you want. I'm in no rush." She responded making him smile shyly.

"I don't deserve you." He mumbled as he looked to where their hands were still joined and moved to link his fingers through hers. The contact was sending a buzz through him which made it so much easier to forget all his reasons why he was meant to stay away from Bella.

"True, you deserve so much more." She commented also glancing to their joined hands and feeling that same buzz. She missed Edward shaking his head slightly in denial of her words but as he lifted his gaze back to her face she looked up too and as they smiled to each other they were both hit with the strong feeling that this was right. It might not be easy, and it might take time and a lot of patience but where they were, hand in hand was where they were meant to be. It was home. 

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><p>Edward watched Bella as she moved around his kitchen wondering how a day that had started so poorly could end so well. He hadn't expected Bella to even turn up and had definitely not expected her to stay so for her to still be there, and apparently still interested in him was nothing short of a miracle. While he still wasn't convinced, her comments had stuck and whereas before there'd been nothing but despair there was now a little hope. She was right when it came to Lucy, he wouldn't have had her without that night, and he couldn't imagine not having her now so even though it had been one of the worst nights of his life, it had given him the best thing in it. It had also lead him to Carlisle and Esme who had already proved themselves to care more about him than his own parents and to Bella.<p>

When he'd pulled her into the hug he hadn't really thought about it until his arms were wrapped around her but as she returned it, the fear he'd been expecting never came. Instead he could actually enjoy the feel of it and for the first time in a very long time he felt totally at peace. There was something about the way her body fit against his, and the subtle strawberry scent that surrounded her that made all his worries cease to exist so that all that mattered was staying exactly where he was. It was reminiscent of the way Lucy could eclipse anything else going on in his life and it was odd for him to feel that about someone else. Holding her just felt right and now there was no misplaced fear to mask it.

That revelation was what caused him to ask if she still wanted to be with him. He was still convinced she shouldn't but she was insistent that she did so even though he wasn't sure how he'd cope with it he wanted to try. Maybe her faith in him would be enough for both of them.

"What happened to the wall?" Bella suddenly asked, jerking Edward out of his thoughts. Seeing that she was pointing the knife she'd been using at the freshly plastered circle near the door he couldn't help but smile again at his brother's stupidity.

"Emmett." He answered simply watching as her face scrunched up cutely in confusion before something seemed to click and she matched his smile.

"So that's what happened to his hand? Why'd he do that?" She asked unaware she'd headed into dangerous territory.

"That was his response to Carlisle telling him what happened to me." He explained and as his thoughts automatically went to what Carlisle had said, his smile fell and Bella regretted asking anything about the wall. Wanting to do anything to get a smile back on his face she dropped that topic and quickly tried to think of something else to talk about.

"How about we play twenty questions while we cook?" She suggested in an attempt to distract him. If they were serious about starting a relationship there were still plenty of things they had to learn about each other.

Eager to think about anything else, Edward happily accepted Bella's suggestion and they managed to have fun cooking dinner as they stuck to pretty basic questions like favourite colours and TV shows, keeping the conversation light. At the same time as answering the questions, Bella showed him how to cook the pasta bake she'd made for him and Lucy before and while they moved around the kitchen she noticed him getting closer than he usually would, their arms brushing against each other or his hand landing on her shoulder or waist as he walked by. The kitchen was small, but not small enough for the close proximity to be necessary and it made her smile to think that maybe one of his walls had come down. She'd meant it when she said they'd go slow but it was an encouraging sign that he seemed to like the contact as she certainly did. Even so, she tried not to let on that she'd noticed what he was doing in case she scared him off and instead tried to keep her concentration on the cooking.

When everyone else arrived home they'd finished eating and were curled up on the sofa together, Edward having pulled her closer once they'd sat down so she was resting against his shoulder. Lucy grinned brightly at them both before climbing up onto Edward's lap so she could tell them all about the pizza restaurant Esme had taken them too. While Lucy had Edward's attention it left Bella to meet Esme's gaze as she stood by the doorway. There was no missing the pleased smile on her face as she looked at the way they were sitting together and Bella felt herself blushing under the scrutiny but she was relieved Esme seemed happy. There was no missing the grin on Emmett's face as he trailed in after everyone else and spotted Bella and Edward. Bella was just thankful he didn't actually comment as she was sure if he had, it would have embarrassed Edward into moving away and she was quite happy where she was.

She stayed for a little while longer but Edward began to look tired and when he started rubbing at his left shoulder as if it was bothering him she knew it was time to go. He looked a little disappointed when she said she needed to get home but he didn't argue so she assumed she'd guessed right that he was starting to feel a little rough. Even though she said it wasn't necessary he still walked her to the door and when they got there he pulled her into another hug. She loved how it felt to be wrapped in his arms, he was tall enough that if felt like she was totally encased, the top of her head easily tucking in under his chin. He seemed as reluctant to pull back from it as she did but she had to get home and as he let go of her he started to rub at his shoulder again.

"Is your shoulder bothering you?" She couldn't help but ask, automatically worrying about him.

"A little, the bathroom floor wasn't the most comfortable of mattresses." He answered with a half smile which didn't hide the cloud that started to cover his eyes letting her know where his thoughts had gone and why he'd spent the night on the bathroom floor.

"Remember what I said, don't dwell on the bad and think about the positives. I'll call you tomorrow if you're not up to the school run." She said taking hold of his hand and linking her fingers through his like he'd done before and it seemed to cheer him as the cloud vanished from his eyes as he smiled slightly again.

"I'll try, text me when you get home so I'll know Poppy didn't break down on you?" He asked making Bella smile as he made the effort not to lose himself in his thoughts by teasing her. With a playful scowl she informed him that both her and Poppy would get home just fine as Poppy would wait until he was in need of a lift to break down if he kept talking about her like that and was able to leave with a final glance at Edward's glowing smile. 

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><p>"Daddy?" Lucy's voice called from behind Edward as he closed and locked the front door. When he turned around to face her she was standing in the living room doorway looking at him curiously.<p>

"What's up Luce?" He asked holding his arms out for a hug, an invitation that she happily accepted.

"Are you ok?" She asked.

"I'm good baby, I promise." He answered, for once telling the truth as although his shoulder hurt, he was tired and he'd had enough of talking for one day the prospect of getting closer to Bella definitely made it better. He could see her studying his expression and watched the smile slowly spread across her own face.

"Bella made you better?" She questioned and he grinned at the fact they were thinking exactly the same thing.

"Yes she did. You wouldn't mind if we saw her a little more often would you?" He asked, pretty sure that she wouldn't but thinking it was probably best to check. Now he'd accepted it and had a taste of what it could be like, he wanted to spend a lot more time around Bella and if that was to happen it was going to have to include Lucy. Luckily the large smile lighting her face told him all he needed to know.

"I'd like that." She told him enthusiastically.

"Good, I think I would too. Now I think it's bed time for someone." He announced, sweeping Lucy into his arms and making her giggle.

"I don't want to go to bed yet." She complained but it was already past her bedtime as Esme had kept them out at the restaurant quite late and he was tired enough that he wanted to go to bed himself.

"Tough, you've got school tomorrow and it's already late." He told her before dropping her onto her bed, making her giggle again. He loved that sound.

After instructing her to get her pyjamas on, he left her room to go and get her glass of milk and was thankful when neither Esme nor Emmett tried to help him as they let him just enjoy the little bit of normalcy with his daughter while they stayed where they were chatting quietly in the living room.

He got Lucy tucked into bed then settled down next to her on top of the covers as he gave in to her pleading for a bedtime story as it was something she rarely asked for. It only took half an hour for her eyes to start to close against her will so he closed the book and leant down to kiss her forehead.

"Love you baby." He told her quietly, receiving a mumbled version in return as she slipped off to sleep. After putting the book away on the bookshelf in her room he turned the light out and carefully pulled the door shut, leaving it a little ajar in case she needed something in the night.

His phone bleeped a little while later just after he'd climbed into his own bed, having said goodnight to Emmett and Esme who were still up talking in the living room. When he reached over to pick it up he discovered it was the text from Bella telling him that she had indeed arrived home safely with a happy well behaving Poppy. It was quite a long winded text as she went on to explain that she'd meant to text him earlier only Phil had made an unexpected early return home and their house was chaos. As the text rambled on, it made him smile as it was so typically Bella, typed the same way she talked. He sent her a short reply saying he was glad she made it home and goodnight before he put his phone down and pulled the covers up around him. He was still smiling as he closed his eyes and he couldn't help but hope this would be a turning point for him. He'd reached the lowest he thought he could get that morning so surely that meant things had to start getting better. With Bella around he was hopeful they would and he was willing to try her way of thinking to make sure his past didn't ruin their future.


	30. Chapter 28 Penguins

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

AN - I apologise that this probably isn't so good...I suck at writing fluff but I tried! I don't know if I'll get the next chapter up next week as it will be Christmas eve and I'll be travelling down to my parents' house the night before so it's going to cut down on the time I'll have for editing but I'll try my best to get it up. If I don't succeed I hope you all have a good Christmas!

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><p><strong>Chapter 28 – Penguins<strong>

Everyone could see the effort Edward was putting in to being ok. Through the day time he managed to cope, sticking to his plan of following Bella's way of thinking. He tried his best not to dwell on the nastier aspects and instead focused on Lucy and Bella and for the most part he succeeded. Lucy was pleased to have her Daddy back as he stayed cheerful and attentive, even managing to join Emmett on the school runs even if they did still take the car. She didn't even mind sharing him with Bella who was always waiting to greet them with a smile which Edward followed with a hug, keeping hold of her hand for the rest of the time spent by the school gates. Their new closeness didn't go unnoticed by the other parents and relatives and their gossiping didn't go unnoticed by Edward either but being well used to being the source of gossip he found it easy to ignore especially with Bella's closeness being the perfect distraction.

They didn't have chance to meet up after school as Bella's college work needed doing but they continued to text and even that little contact was a novel idea for Edward which he revelled in. It had been so long since he'd even had so much as a friend that now he had Bella he found himself constantly craving contact with her, whether that was physically by holding her hand or just communication when she wasn't near him. It was new and exciting and now they knew where his original fear had stemmed from it didn't seem to be reappearing. All he felt now when he was close to Bella was a serene sense of calmness that he didn't get any other time. He was so glad there was no need to try and hide it from Lucy as the compulsion to reach out to her when she was near was too strong to ignore. The brilliant smile on Lucy's face every time he hugged Bella or took her hand just made him sure that however unlikely it seemed, he and Bella were right. Everyone always told him how smart Lucy was and he had no reason to distrust her judgement.

Unfortunately while Edward was doing ok at controlling his thoughts while awake, he had no control of them while he slept which resulted in restless nights filled with nightmares. When he got up in the mornings it was easy to see how little sleep he was getting and by Friday morning the circles beneath his eyes were that dark it was beginning to look like he'd got two black eyes and his appetite had dwindled down once again so if it had been up to him he would have been existing on coffee alone. He was really having to fight to hold onto his new brighter outlook on things and the strain of it was beginning to show in the slightly forced smiles and downcast eyes.

The idea of sleeping pills had been brought up more than once but Edward was adamant he did not want to take them. It didn't matter how much any of them assured him they were perfectly safe and very commonly used he just didn't like the thought of them and it wasn't just for him. He didn't want Lucy to wake up in the night and need him only to not be able to wake him so he clung to that excuse whenever they were brought up but everyone could see the other reason he wouldn't voice. He didn't ever want to lose control of himself again.

When Bella and Anna arrived at the school on Friday morning Edward, Lucy and Emmett were already there. They didn't notice their approach at first as they were all looking into Lucy's bag which Emmett was holding open for her as she searched through it. Even from a distance it was easy to see how tired Edward was and Bella was surprised he'd even made it out of bed. He was the first to spot them when Lucy eventually found what she'd been looking for and he glanced up from them closing Lucy's bag again. He smiled as soon as he spotted Bella before Lucy caught his attention again by holding out to him what she'd found which appeared to be two hair ties. Letting Lucy take care of saying hello, he worked on getting her hair tied up into bunches.

"Having a bad hair day Lucy?" Bella asked, curious as to why Edward was doing her hair there as she was usually so well put together for school.

"Uncle Emmett can't do it and Daddy isn't really awake." Lucy answered happily. Edward had been too tired to realise that Emmett was once again letting her go to school without her hair tied back and it wasn't until they'd reached the school gates and she was having trouble seeing with the wind constantly blowing her hair into her face that he'd noticed and remembered what the problem was.

"Hey, I am awake. My coffee just hadn't quite kicked in at home." Edward commented while lightly tugging on one of her now finished bunches. Lucy scowled at that before she turned and stuck her tongue out at him in retaliation making him grin as he reached out to tug the other one.

"Don't be cheeky." He lightly scolded her but the large smile on his face showed he wasn't really serious and was enjoying their playfulness.

"Love you Daddy." She responded with the matching smile and he shook his head slightly at her blatant use of that phrase to get herself out of trouble.

"Love you too baby, now go get into school, the bell will be ringing soon." He commented, standing up from his seat on the wall so he could hug her properly before she left. After they'd all said goodbye to Anna as well who'd been standing quietly beside Bella watching Edward and Lucy the girls ran off into school together and Emmett wandered over to his car to give Bella and Edward a minute or two alone before they headed home.

Edward watched until the girls were safely inside the school then sank back down onto the wall and reached out for Bella's hand to tug her closer. She happily moved into his side and when he leant his head against her shoulder she couldn't help but run a hand through his hair.

"Lucy really has you wrapped around her little finger doesn't she?" She commented with a small smile in reference to how she'd so easily played him.

"Always has had." He responded, feeling quite content after the playfulness with Lucy and now Bella's closeness. If his days could stick to purely that he was sure he'd be in heaven.

"Still not sleeping well?" Bella asked as she watched him close his eyes and inhale deeply. He looked so tired yet strangely content. There was something oddly child like to his expression and it made her want to take care of him.

"No, don't expect that will change very soon either." He answered immediately losing some of his contentedness as his thoughts touched on the nightmares that made it so impossible for him to get a full night's sleep. Making the effort to rein his thoughts in he refocused on the warmth and scent of Bella and couldn't help thinking that being so tired wouldn't be so bad if her shoulder was there for a pillow. It was surprisingly comfortable and as she'd found his fondness for having someone play with his hair he would have been all too happy to fall asleep right there, sitting on the school's wall.

"Maybe you should reconsider the sleeping pills." Bella quietly commented, knowing he wouldn't like that idea but hating seeing him look so tired. He was doing so well otherwise but if he didn't get some decent sleep soon then he'd be running the risk of getting ill again and he was only just getting better.

"No, I'll be ok. If I could survive the sleepless nights of Lucy's early years, then I'll be fine with a few more."

"We just don't want you getting ill again."

"Other than being tired I feel fine, you don't need to worry." He tried to assure her and lifted his head off her shoulder so he could see her face. She didn't look convinced but she smiled a little letting him know she wasn't going to push the issue.

"At least try and get some sleep today." She pleaded to which he smiled sadly before getting up from the wall again.

"Getting to sleep isn't the problem." He muttered while pulling her in for a hug, "But I'll try. We should probably be going or you'll be late for college and Emmett will come back over here to get me."

"I guess, I'll see you after school then." She responded, tightening her hold on him just a little before reluctantly letting go. Being wrapped in his arms had quickly become her favourite place.

"Have fun at college."

"I'll try, sleep well."

"I'll try." He echoed her response making her smile as his mouth twitched into the crooked smile she loved before they headed off in separate directions, both silently cursing the fact they couldn't spend the day together.

* * *

><p>When they got back to the flat Edward went straight back to bed and seeing where he'd gone Emmett had an idea. Going into Lucy's room he found the doll Edward had fallen asleep with the last time his nightmares had been getting too much and picked it up, taking it through to Edward's room where he found him already curled up in his bed but his tired eyes still open.<p>

"Thought this might help." He said holding out the doll when Edward turned onto his side to face him having heard him enter. He looked at it sceptically for a moment before sighing and holding his hand out to take it. Somehow he didn't think it would do much good this time. His nightmares had extended their reach, it didn't seem to matter what he started out dreaming about, James or the night of the party always crept in, seemingly determined to taunt him. At that point however he was so tired that anything was worth a try if it would give him just a couple of hours of uninterrupted sleep. He thanked Emmett as he was grateful for the thought since it wasn't yet another attempt at persuading him to take the sleeping pills then rolled back over to try and sleep.

A few hours later Edward stumbled out of his room looking no better than he had in the morning. He went straight to the kitchen to make himself some coffee and it wasn't until he'd sat down at the kitchen table and taken his first large gulp that he realised Emmett and Esme were sitting there watching him. It didn't surprise him to see Esme there, she seemed to be becoming almost as permanent a fixture as Emmett. What did surprise him was he didn't seem to mind. In fact seeing her usually brought a smile to his face but right then he was too tired for that.

"The doll didn't help then?" Emmett asked only for Edward to shake his head before drinking more of his coffee.

"Maybe this will then, give you some good memories to dream about." Esme said, sliding an envelope that had been sitting on the table in front of her, towards him. He glanced at her curiously before picking the envelope up and opening it, finding a family ticket for the Zoo along with a gift card for the gift shop. "I thought it would be something you and Lucy would enjoy considering how much she loves all those animal documentaries on TV and you can take Bella and Anna. Getting out and having fun would do you good."

"I can't accept this, it's too much." He responded, knowing how expensive the tickets were as he'd always wanted to take Lucy there and that didn't even include the gift card which, as he looked at it again, he realised was for a hundred pounds. There was no way he could take it.

"Don't be silly, of course you can. I want you to have it and I've already paid for it all anyway so it would just be wasted if you didn't take it. I've missed twenty of your birthdays and five of Lucy's, never mind all the Christmases, I've got a lot of missed presents to make up for so I don't want to hear another word about it."

"You don't have to do that." Edward responded, horrified by the thought of it but that just made Esme smile.

"Accept that and maybe I won't but either way I do intend spoil you so you may as well get used to it." She commented happily leaving Edward unsure of what to say as he was sure arguing would only make her more determined to do it. From the way she was smiling it was clear she knew what he was thinking and already knew she'd won.

"Thank you. I'll ask Bella tonight." He gave in and as he looked at the ticket again he wondered if it would count as a date if they had the girls along with them. He rather hoped it would as he liked the idea of dating Bella.

* * *

><p>Saturday morning dawned with Edward's household running around in chaos. Having actually managed to fall into a relatively peaceful sleep Edward managed to oversleep leaving him in a rush to get ready before Bella arrived to pick them up. Emmett didn't wake up until he heard Edward crashing around in his room as he'd turned off his alarm for the weekend and Lucy was slow to get up once Edward tried to wake her as she'd stayed up later than she should have, having been too excited about the zoo to settle down to sleep.<p>

By the time Esme and Carlisle appeared wielding shopping bags full of food Edward was only just getting started on making his coffee, Emmett was still showering and Lucy was getting dressed.

"Hey sweetheart, I thought I'd cook breakfast for you all before you leave and Carlisle wanted to see how you were doing. Everything ok?" Esme asked when Edward opened the door to them in looking rather stressed.

"Yeah we just all overslept. Breakfast sounds great, thanks." He answered, relaxing a little with the task of getting breakfast ready out of his hands.

"Oversleeping is an improvement on not sleeping, how are you feeling?" Carlisle asked as they followed Edward through to the kitchen where he retrieved his coffee.

"Not too bad, still tired but nothing a little coffee won't fix." He answered honestly and with the way Carlisle was studying him he knew he was looking for any signs of illness still lingering and hoped he wouldn't see anything too concerning. The last thing he wanted was for Carlisle to declare him too unwell for spending the day running around the zoo. He was really looking forward to it.

"How about your chest symptoms?" He enquired while taking a seat at the table which allowed Edward to relax as it seemed there was nothing too concerning about his appearance.

"They're a lot better, I've not been coughing anywhere near as much or getting out of breath." He responded feeling quite proud of that and the resulting smile his words coaxed from Carlisle only enhanced that feeling.

"That's good but still be careful not to overdo things. It wouldn't take much to set you back." Carlisle warned lightly and Edward nodded but before he could comment Lucy appeared and squealed happily at finding Carlisle and Esme there. Seeing that Esme was busy sorting out breakfast she headed for Carlisle first and held her arms out for a hug.

"Well don't you look pretty today." Carlisle commented once he'd hugged Lucy, causing her to giggle and spin around to show off her pale pink dress that had flowers around the bottom rim, a butterfly just below the shoulder and a slightly darker pink ribbon that tied around the middle. Edward watched on with amusement as Lucy glowed under Carlisle's attention but had to agree she looked pretty. It was a very typical Lucy dress and he'd always liked it.

"It's one of my favourite dresses." Lucy told Carlisle happily.

"I should think so too, a pretty one like this." He said making her grin wider while Edward chuckled slightly and shook his head.

"The number of dresses she has I'm surprised she can choose a favourite." He commented causing Esme to laugh.

"Well a girl can never have enough dresses." She commented to which Lucy nodded enthusiastically.

"Don't I know it." Edward laughed thinking of all the times he'd taken her clothes shopping and all she'd wanted him to buy was dresses.

"What time are Bella and Anna getting here?" Esme asked wondering how long she had to get them breakfast whilst Lucy climbed up onto Carlisle's knee much to his surprise.

"She said around ten." Edward answered, feeling a slight flutter of nerves but for once they were more from anticipation than fear. He was looking forward to spending the day with them. The animals would keep the girls entertained so he was fairly confident he'd get some chances to talk to Bella and he couldn't wait to see Lucy's face when they saw the penguins. He just knew she'd love them. It was going to be good just to spend the day away from the flat as well as getting to see Bella so he was definitely excited.

They'd just finished the scrambled eggs and bacon Esme had cooked when there was a knock at the door. Knowing Bella and Anna were meant to be arriving Lucy jumped up and ran for the door but although Edward knew it was most likely safe he still couldn't stop his instincts which made him shoot up from his chair and chase after her. He caught her half way through the living room and swung her up into his arms.

"You don't answer the door by yourself baby, you know that." He scolded, keeping her firmly in his arms as he walked to the door.

"Sorry Daddy." She answered looping her arms around his neck to hug him as he carried her. The stern expression on his face showed he was being serious this time and she did know she wasn't meant to answer the door, her excitement had just gotten the better of her.

"It's ok this time baby, I know you're excited just don't do it again." He cautioned before kissing her forehead and smiling, letting her know she was forgiven. It really wasn't her fault he was paranoid but he needed to know she would do everything she could to stay safe.

Pulling the front door open he was met with a smiling Bella and an overexcited Anna who hugged him before he'd even had chance to put Lucy down. As soon as Lucy was on her feet again and they'd all said hello she grabbed Anna's hand announcing that she was going to introduce her to Carlisle and Esme before tugging her in the direction of the kitchen.

"Well they both seem excited." Bella commented as she stepped past Edward so he could close the door.

"They're not the only ones." He answered cheerfully making Bella smile back at him. He looked a lot better than he had the day before and the dark circles beneath his eyes were gone.

"Thanks again for inviting us, I think Anna's even decided she likes me again now." Bella commented as Edward took hold of her hand, linking their fingers together and started leading the way through to the kitchen.

"She's finally forgiven you for insisting on taking her to school then?" Edward asked, as amused as always at Anna's stubbornness when it came to her sister. Bella had told Phil he didn't need to worry about taking Anna to school while he was home as she was happy to continue doing it as with the growing relationship between her and Edward she hadn't wanted to miss the opportunity to see him. As Renee had already filled Phil in on Bella's feelings he'd happily agreed but Anna hadn't been quite so happy with that plan. She'd spent the rest of the week stubbornly refusing to talk to Bella while sulking whenever they were around each other. When Bella had explained to him just why Anna was in such a foul mood with her he'd found the whole thing amusing considering how gleefully happy Lucy always looked when they were around Bella.

"I'm not sure she's gone quite that far, but she's talking to me again and has finally stopped glaring at me." Bella responded just before they entered the kitchen. They could already hear Lucy and Anna talking excitedly with Esme but as soon as they entered the room Lucy switched her attention to Edward, asking if they could go yet. While Edward fielded Lucy's seemingly never ending list of questions about the zoo that started up after he'd told her they'd be leaving soon, Bella noticed the way Carlisle was looking at their joined hands. It was only then that it struck her just how comfortable Edward seemed to be with showing affection like that. Where she'd expected him to be shy and hesitant he seemed to actually crave the contact and certainly wasn't shy about displaying it. It didn't seem to matter who was around, as soon as he saw her he'd be pulling her into a hug or reaching for her hand. As she looked back to Edward there was no hiding the smile that thought caused and she felt a new wave of excitement for the day ahead, making her as impatient to leave as Lucy was.

"I'm just going to help Lucy with her hair and she wants to show Anna her room so we'll be back in five minutes or so then we can get going." Edward told her and realising Bella was staring at him he wondered what was making her look so happy but smiled in return anyway before he followed the girls to Lucy's room.

"It's good to see you again Bella." Carlisle commented once Edward, Anna and Lucy had left, leaving the kitchen in a slightly awkward silence which made Bella wish she'd followed them.

"You too." She responded a little awkwardly but she tried her best to seem relaxed and smiled a little tentatively. She hadn't really run into Carlisle again since the hospital and the first time they'd met she'd tried to argue with him over contacting Edward's family so she wasn't entirely sure what impression of her he'd been left with.

"Would you like a coffee or anything?" Esme asked as she finished packing the picnic lunch she'd made for them all. She was glad to see both Anna and Bella looked excited for the day as well as Edward and Lucy. She really wanted everything to go well for him. He'd had far too many bad days recently and nowhere near enough good ones to counter them.

"No thanks, I'm ok. Edward said it was you we had to thank for today so thank you." Bella answered, feeling a little more at ease with Esme as she was fairly sure she liked her.

"Don't mention it. I just want him to have some fun. The poor boy seems to spend all his time doing nothing but worrying." She responded and it made Bella like her even more with how much she obviously cared for Edward and didn't mind showing it.

"Well I'll do my best to make sure he enjoys himself today." She responded hoping she'd succeed. He already seemed so excited that it ought to be an easy task.

"Can you keep an eye on him? He looks well but he'll probably still tire easily and he doesn't want to overdo things just yet." Carlisle cautioned to which Bella easily agreed as she'd already expected that they'd have to be careful not to wear him out too fast. The girls were going to be full of energy for the whole day and she knew he'd want to be chasing after them all the time but they were going to have to try and keep things a little more relaxed. It wasn't going to help that the zoo was built on a steep hill but so long as they took their time they ought to be ok.

"Sounds like they're ready to go. There's enough food in there for a small army so you should be all set for the day." Esme announced cutting off Carlisle's opportunity for any more warnings and zipping up the cool bag she'd been packing as they all heard giggling getting nearer.

"Thank you Esme, I'm sure we'll all appreciate it." Bella responded just before Edward appeared in the doorway still looking incredibly happy when he found Bella's gaze.

"You ready to go? Lucy's just putting her shoes on then we're good."

"Yep I'm all set." She responded, picking up the cool bag which caught Edward's attention and she noticed him looking at it curiously. "Esme made us lunch."

"You didn't need to do that but thank you." Edward said moving his gaze to Esme whose smile didn't drop even though Edward was looking at her a little uncomfortably as his smile fell. He really didn't feel right accepting so much from her, the tickets had already been too much and then she'd added breakfast and lunch on top of it.

"Remember what I said yesterday?" She asked pleasantly making Edward scowl a little as he nodded. "Good. You better get going, have fun."

"We will and thanks again." Edward responded before saying goodbye to Carlisle and taking the cool bag from Bella even though she told him she'd carry it. After she'd also said goodbye to Carlisle and Esme they found the girls out in the corridor with a still distinctly sleepy looking Emmett. He was crouched down in front of Lucy, pointing to something she was holding and looking down at curiously as Emmett talked.

"What you got there Luce?" Edward asked, unable to see what it was with how she was holding it and Emmett blocking most of the corridor.

"Uncle Emmett gave me a camera." She answered, holding out to him what Edward could now see was a disposable camera. He took it from her and glanced at it for a moment before looking to Emmett who had straightened up and was looking a little apprehensively at him.

"You can't go to the zoo and not take pictures." He explained sheepishly half expecting Edward to get upset as he knew how much Edward hated them buying things for them. That was why he'd opted for a cheap disposable camera rather than the digital one he had originally thought about.

"Thank you." Edward said for what felt like the hundredth time that morning. He couldn't argue with Emmett about wanting to take pictures at the zoo as if he'd owned a camera he definitely would have been taking it with them. It was a nice thought, and the fact he'd picked a disposable camera over an expensive one made it easier for him to accept the gesture as it showed Emmett was actually learning and was taking his opinions into consideration

"You're welcome. I'll see you all later and I want to hear all about the animals you see when you get home Luce. Make sure you take plenty of pictures for me." Emmett said, breaking into a large smile when he realised Edward wasn't going to kick up a fuss about the camera and actually seemed to appreciate it. He'd finally managed to get something right.

* * *

><p>When they got down to Bella's car Edward kept a firm grip on Anna and Lucy's hands while Bella struggled with the lock on Poppy's boot. The nervousness of being outside had kicked in for Edward even with his excitement about the day ahead and while they stood there he couldn't help but look around them trying to spot the figures he hoped weren't there.<p>

"And we're in! It always sticks, don't really use the boot that often." Bella murmured as Edward was forced to let go of Lucy's hand to get the cool bag off his shoulder. As soon as Bella had hold of it and was stashing it into the car Edward reclaimed Lucy's hand, feeling the brief flash of panic he'd felt settle down again. He hated feeling so nervous from just being out in the open but he couldn't stop it so he was relieved when Bella had closed the boot, relocked it and was opening the doors.

Watching as Bella helped the girls into the car and got them buckled in he finally started to relax knowing that they were safe in the car and they'd soon all be leaving. He really didn't think James would try anything at the Zoo even if he did decide to turn up there as it was far too public and would most likely be crowded. When they were all in and Bella had started the car he looked over his shoulder to see Lucy and Anna's smiling faces. With the two booster seats in the back he had to wonder how Bella had even managed to get the seats back there, they were so large and bulky and the backseat wasn't exactly spacious. Unable to stop the curiosity now the thought had occurred to him he had to voice it out loud.

"How did you get two booster seats to fit back there?"

"With a lot of effort and patience." She answered easily, missing the concern that flashed across Edward's face when he realised she'd had to do that for him, so she could take care of Lucy when he couldn't. He didn't like that he'd put her out and he was still too on edge from their brief moment outside to push back the negative feelings like he'd been trying so hard to do that week. Realising his silence meant he hadn't taken her words as lightly as she'd meant them a small frown marred her features. "I was joking, it's not actually that hard, Mum helped hold the front seat out of the way and you'd be surprised how much space there is back there."

Edward studied Bella for a moment before deciding she wasn't just playing it down to calm him then relaxed back into his seat. Closing his eyes for a moment he forced himself back under control and tried to pull back the excitement he'd been feeling before. He did not want to have spoilt their day out with stupid insecurities before they'd even made it out of the car park.

"So...what are you looking forward to seeing the most? Lucy can't decide and Anna wants to see the monkeys." He asked, opening his eyes again and changing the subject back to something fun.

"Urm I'm not sure, maybe the lions. What about you?" She answered, pleased that he sounded happy again.

"The penguins." He answered straight away as he smiled widely. Bella glanced at him quickly, wondering what it was about the penguins that made him so happy but then as she caught sight of Lucy in the backseat and remembered about her duck obsession she put two and two together. She could just imagine Lucy loving the penguins and she knew that could easily cause the smile on Edward's face. It wasn't the animals he was looking forward to seeing but Lucy's reaction to them. Typically Edward.

They reached the zoo and Lucy and Anna were eager to get out of the car as soon as Bella had parked. They waited impatiently for Edward to join them at their side of the car once Bella had let them out of her door before they each grabbed hold of one of his hands and skipped off towards the entrance, dragging Edward along with them. He didn't put up much of a fight as he was just as excited but he did spare a moment to glance back to Bella were she was once again fighting with the lock on the boot. She looked up at him once the door fell open and smiled before grabbing the bag, locking the car up and hurrying to catch up with them, taking hold of Anna's free hand when she did.

Once inside the entrance building they waited in a queue for a while, Lucy and Anna providing amusement for them as they tried to wait patiently but their excitement was making it difficult for them. From watching them fidget Edward knew it was going to be a tiring day in the end. He already knew their excitement was rubbing off on him and was pretty sure that they'd probably spend most the day chasing each other round the zoo or something similar. Glancing to Bella he hoped she'd be up for it and wouldn't be disappointed with him if he got caught up playing with Lucy and Anna. He wasn't used to having another adult to entertain and he wasn't sure he'd succeed at it but her reassuring smile was enough to let him push back his doubts and concerns and focus back on the joy of the day. Finally reaching the front of the queue Edward handed over the tickets and then finally they were inside, stood staring at a large map wondering where to go first.

They spent the rest of the morning letting Lucy and Anna lead them around the zoo. So far they'd seen the lions, tigers, monkeys, a polar bear, some otters and a variety of birds. Lucy had found their enclosure and made them stay there until they'd spent at least five minutes looking at every different kind there, taking pictures of them all with the camera Emmett had bought for them.

By the time it reached lunch time it had turned into a really nice sunny day so they found the child's play area and picnic tables and unpacked their lunch. After the food was gone Lucy and Anna had decided they wanted to play so while they were over at the climbing frame Edward moved from where he'd been seated beside Lucy and across from Bella to sit next to her. It gave him the perfect view of where the girls were playing but also allowed him to get closer to Bella which he'd been wanting to do since they'd arrived but the girls were so overexcited they'd needed to keep a hold of their hands to stop them wandering off and getting lost.

"Having fun?" Bella asked once he'd settled down beside her to which he grinned and nodded.

"Yup, Lucy's loving the zoo and I can't wait to see her face when she sees the penguins, I have a feeling she'll rather like them." He answered brightly.

"We'll have to head up that way soon if we want to catch them on the parade." She commented and he nodded but continued to gaze at her and a slightly softer look came over his eyes although the happiness was still there.

"We've still got a few minutes yet though." He responded while taking hold of her hand and the comforting buzz he felt the instant their skin touched made him certain he wasn't going to be easily letting go again for the rest of the afternoon. Hopefully now they were full of food and had run off most of their energy the girls would take things a little slower. Bella watched the contented smile spread across his face as he looked at their hands but although he looked perfectly happy, as a little of the energy slipped away she could see the tiredness beginning to creep in.

"How are you holding up? Not too tired yet?" She asked concernedly, stroking her thumb over the back of his hand.

"No I'm good. How about you? Have they exhausted you yet?" He countered since she didn't always seem to know how to cope with the girls when they were excited but she just laughed and bumped his shoulder with hers.

"I'm fine, your super dad ways leave me with very little to do as far as they're concerned." She responded as she'd spent most of the morning trailing after them just watching Edward and occasionally glancing at the animals. He looked good in his worn jeans and the view certainly made her happy to follow behind. Anna was all too happy to talk to Edward over her and considering he seemed at his happiest when dealing with kids she saw no reason to intervene. It was just good to see him so happy and it wasn't even forced like it had been the rest of the week. There was an easy air around them that hadn't been there before, Edward really was at peace and she was just happy that it included her.

"Sorry, I get a little too involved sometimes." He muttered slightly embarrassed that he had let himself get too immersed in the girls, he hadn't meant to leave Bella out but it was just what came naturally to him now.

"Hey don't apologize, I think it's kind of adorable. It's good that you're that close to Lucy and I know Anna is loving the attention. I don't think I'm the only one with a crush on you." She commented, loving the startled, slightly shocked and then embarrassed look that caused Edward. She couldn't help but laugh and Edward joined in with a shake of his head. When their laughter died out they were left just staring at each other, their faces flushed and smiles sparkling. Edward was struck by the sudden urge to lean in and kiss her but he didn't want to ruin a so far perfect day by freaking out on her. Instead he settled for brushing a strand of hair back behind her ear that had fallen in front of her face as she'd left her hair loose that day and marvelled at the way her head tilted into the slight touch of his hand. How he'd managed to catch the attentions of somebody so beautiful he had no idea.

"We should get moving, we don't want to miss the penguins." Bella quietly commented. He was so close and the look of his face was so tender and content as he watched her that if they didn't move she was going to end up doing something they would both regret. His smile and the sparkle in his eyes along with the feeling of his hands on her skin was enough to remove all traces of common sense and boundaries. It really didn't help matters that she could see the longing in his eyes but he had to make that final move and the hesitation showed he wasn't ready yet.

"Yeah your right, we should." He mumbled before sliding along the bench so he could stand up although he didn't let go of her hand so she moved to join him.

"Luce, Anna! Time to find the penguins." He called as he beat Bella to picking up the cool bag and slung it over his shoulder before she could try to get it off him. Instead of chasing off with the girls, as they walked towards the penguins they let them run a little ahead of them while they followed at a more leisurely pace. When they reached the penguin enclosure Edward reluctantly let go of Bella's hand so he could pick Lucy up when they found a clear space by the side of the pathway but even though they were no longer holding hands Edward stood that close to Bella that she could feel the heat of his body against her side and they're arms brushed against each other. Trying not to focus on that feeling so she wouldn't be compelled to do something stupid, Bella kept her mind on keeping Anna still in front of her as she stood with her hands on her shoulders, watching the penguins trail past following their zoo keepers. The penguins only held her attention for a minute before she was glancing back to Edward and found that his gaze was fixed on Lucy who was watching the penguins with a look of pure amazement on her face.

"She's never seen penguins before has she?" Bella asked him quietly, startling him a little as he'd been so caught up watching Lucy.

"I think she's seen them in books but this is rather different. The ducks may have some competition after this." He answered, going back to watching Lucy who looked up at him with one of the largest smiles he'd seen. He'd never be able to find a way to repay Esme for giving them that day.

A while later and they found themselves in the gift shop, Lucy staring up at the large mound of soft toy penguins. After the penguin walk had finished they'd spent ages watching them in their enclosure, Lucy absolutely mesmerised, so much so that they had been unable to move on until Lucy was satisfied they'd got enough photos of the birds and Edward had promised her a soft toy one from the shop. They'd then moved on to look round the rest of the zoo but nothing else could beat the penguins in Lucy's eyes and they'd listened to her chatter on about them for the rest of the day. Now though Lucy was tired out and was happily being held by Edward as they wandered round the gift shop having come to a stop as soon as they'd reached the soft toys. Anna wasn't fairing much better as she stood resting against Bella whilst staring at the row of monkeys.

When the girls had finally each picked out a soft toy, Edward encouraged Bella to do the same before letting her talk him into a penguin t-shirt. They also picked out a selection of mugs and glasses before the girls found the stationary section and they chose some pencils they could show off at school. Leaving the gift shop with several bags Edward hoped Esme would be pleased they'd managed to spend the gift card she'd given them and would like the mug Lucy had picked out to give her.

Edward couldn't help smiling as he carried a nearly sleeping Lucy back out towards the car. Her head was resting against his shoulder with one arm loosely around his neck as the other held her toy penguin which she had told him was now called Charlie.

"Have you had a good day?" He asked her while they were waiting for Bella to get Anna settled in the car, causing her to look up at him and nod. "What do you like best now, ducks or penguins?"

"Both." She answered, smiling slightly as Edward laughed.

"Too hard to choose?" He questioned which she nodded to.

"Yup. Can we come to the zoo and see the penguins again?" She asked, her eyes appearing less tired as she thought of it.

"We'll see." He answered and by then Bella was waiting with her seat pulled forward to get Lucy in so he moved to lift her into the car.

It was a rather quiet trip home as once in the car both Lucy and Anna fell asleep while Edward was also finding himself struggling to keep his eyes open. He hadn't noticed himself getting so tired during the day, having too much fun but now that he was sat and quiet he could feel the aches starting to appear in his body as it tried to carry him off to sleep to recuperate. He was determined to stay awake until they got home though, they'd had a good day and he didn't want to spoil it by making anyone worry over how he was.

Stopping at a set of traffic lights Bella glanced into the mirror to see both the girls asleep then looked to her side and saw Edward struggling to keep his eyes open. She was so glad they'd all had a good day and she'd been expecting Edward to be tired so even that didn't lessen it. She hoped that they could do it again soon.

The light turned to green so she fixed her eyes back on the road and moved off again, thankful that the traffic didn't seem too bad as she wanted to get them home quickly as she guessed that Edward wouldn't be able to fight the sleep for too long after their busy day and she knew it would be better if he was home before he lost the battle.

Bella chose a parking spot as close to the front doors of the flat block as she could get, wanting to cut down the amount of walking required as Lucy was out cold in the back and Edward was still struggling to keep his eyes open. The sudden quiet when she cut the engine perked Edward up a little though and when he climbed out of the car after Bella he stopped her from helping to get Lucy out by hurrying to her side of the car and touching a hand to her shoulder.

"Come here." He mumbled once she'd halted and turned to face him and seeing him looking so sleepy but still happy she quickly moved into his arms. They slid around her waist, pulling her tight against him while she let her arms circle his neck and a hand slide into his hair. He dipped his head to bury it in her neck and she tried to stifle a giggle when his breath tickled her skin.

"Thank you for coming with us today." He said, his voice muffled as he refused to pull away from her.

"Thank you for asking us. I had a really good time." She responded and Edward lifted his head again so he could see her face. As he studied her the intensity in his eyes made her heart rate quicken as she wondered what he was thinking. His gaze dropped to her mouth and she held her breath, trying to hold perfectly still as she watched the thoughts battle in his eyes. She could tell he wanted to kiss her again but he was still scared and the shadows chased the longing before he took a deep breath with a sudden look of determination. She still kept perfectly still as he leant in just a little bit closer and his breath brushed across her cheek before he pressed a kiss, very lightly to her cheek, just catching the corner of her mouth. The contact only lasted a couple of seconds before he pulled back but the look of pride, joy and hope on his face and the tingling it left behind on her skin was more than enough.

She stood there in a daze as he turned back to the car and started to get Lucy out and it was the curse as he hit his head on the roof that jerked her back to reality as she hurried to help by holding the seat out of his way. Once Edward had their bags and Lucy was safely out of the car and in his arms miraculously still asleep, Bella and Edward stood facing each other neither wanting to say goodbye.

"I guess I should get Anna home." Bella eventually mumbled knowing that they couldn't stand out there all night just staring at each other. She'd noticed Edward's unease when they'd been in the car park that morning and she didn't want to cause that again by making him linger there.

"Ok, call me tonight?" He asked quietly, looking a little forlorn at the prospect of her leaving. Wanting to see him smile once more before she left Bella impulsively went up onto her toes so she could kiss his cheek, returning his previous gesture and was rewarded with the sparkling green eyes she'd been looking for.

"I will, have a good evening." She said then climbed back into her car and started the engine. Edward watched her go before carrying Lucy inside and when he entered the flat to find Carlisle, Esme and Emmett all sitting around they were all pleased to see how happy he looked.

"Good day?" Esme asked hopefully.

"Very good." He responded. He just hoped they'd get the chance to do something similar again soon, or maybe even try it without the kids around. The little victory of kissing Bella's cheek without any negative reactions made him eager to try it again. Somehow he got the impression that holding her hand wasn't going to be enough for much longer.


	31. Chapter 29 A Little Normality

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

AN - Merry Christmas everyone! This chapter was totally not expected (I had something totally different planned to write), it seems the story is writing itself now but I liked where it went so you're getting the extra chapter. Once again I'm not sure how much time I'll have for writing this week so the next chapter may end up delayed. I hope you enjoy this one and all have a fun Christmas :)

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><p><strong>Chapter 29 – A Little Normality<strong>

"What are you doing?" Edward asked amusedly as he watched Emmett battle with an ironing board, the iron and what appeared to be a button up shirt.

"Ironing?" Emmett answered, succeeding in getting the shirt placed over the ironing board only to knock the iron over as he stumbled over the cable.

"You sure about that?" Edward continued to watch his brother as he took a firmer grip on the iron and ran it over the shirt, only putting in more creases than he was taking out.

"I'm not very good at it, Mum usually does it." He admitted quietly, clearly embarrassed as Edward tried hard not to start laughing.

"Hand it over." He finally ordered, taking pity on his brother and moving up to take the iron from him. He'd had plenty of years of practise what with Lucy's love for pretty dresses as they were all fiddly to iron but he hated to see her dressed in anything less than perfect clothing.

"You don't need to do that, I can manage." Emmett disagreed, only handing the iron over reluctantly as he was meant to be there to help Edward, not the other way around.

"The rate you were going it would have looked better before you'd ironed it. You were putting more creases in than you were taking out. Go make some coffee or something." Edward responded taking over the ironing and making quick work of the shirt Emmett had been struggling with. By the time Emmett reappeared with two mugs of coffee the first shirt was neatly laid over the back of the sofa, along with a second one and Edward was working on a pair of smart trousers having found the pile of crumpled clothing Emmett had left on the arm of the sofa.

"Here's your coffee. Where's Lucy?" Emmett asked, sitting Edward's mug down by the TV and hovering awkwardly nearby with his own mug, not wanting to sit down while Edward was doing his ironing.

"Still in bed, she wasn't awake when I got up so I figured she could do with sleeping in a little after yesterday." He answered. They'd both been tired out after their day at the zoo and while Edward had given in after eating the dinner Esme cooked for them all and had gone to bed Lucy had insisted on staying up until she had told Esme, Carlisle and Emmett all about their day. The way she chattered on, giving them a full minute by minute description of what they'd seen they may as well have been there themselves and by the time she'd exhausted everything she had to say it had been well past her bedtime.

"She did stay up late as well. Certainly had a lot to say about the zoo." Emmett commented. Happy that Lucy was safe in bed, the pile of clothes Edward was currently ironing had more of his attention than Emmett's attempts at conversation. Considering Emmett only ever wore jeans and t-shirts since he'd been staying with them he was curious as to why he needed the smart clothes.

"Are you going to tell me what these are for?" He asked, pointing the iron to the growing pile of crease free clothing. The way Emmett shuffled uncomfortably didn't go unnoticed.

"I was going to talk to you about that, but then Esme gave you the zoo tickets and you were so excited I didn't want to spoil it." He started knowing that Edward was not going to like what he had to say but there was nothing he could do about it. "I have to go back to work tomorrow."

"Oh." Edward looked back to the trousers he was ironing and tried to work out why that unsettled him so much. He should have realised that Emmett's time off was coming to an end as he had been with them for three weeks already. It was what he'd wanted from the start anyway, to be left alone and get back to his old routines but faced with the reality of it now he was struck by the thought that he didn't want Emmett to go. He'd got used to having him around and had grown to like it, exactly as he'd always feared he would.

"I'll still be staying here so I can still help out and nothing much will really change. I was talking to Carlisle and Esme yesterday and she said she can help with Lucy's school runs." Emmett quickly added, seeing the furrow in Edward's brow as he stared blankly at the trousers on the ironing board. It did cheer Emmett a little to see that the idea of him not being there anymore did upset Edward but that in itself made him feel guilty and they hadn't even reached the hard part of the conversation yet.

"I'm sure we'll be fine. Where do you work?" Edward asked after a moment in an attempt to hide the way he was feeling and instead appear interested in Emmett's work. The worried look that question put on Emmett's face however made Edward even more uneasy. It gave him the feeling he wasn't going to like what Emmett had to say.

"I didn't tell you before because it didn't really seem important. I mean you were ill and then the nightmares and everything and well it just seemed better not to tell you." Emmett rambled, lifting his free hand to rub at his neck a sure sign he was feeling nervous and guilty.

"Just tell me." Edward instructed, sitting the iron down so he could concentrate fully on Emmett. All he'd asked was where he worked and he couldn't see why Emmett would be so reluctant to tell him.

"I work in Dad's firm." Emmett finally answered the question and waited for Edward to explode only it never came. In fact as far as he could see Edward had no reaction to his words at all as he stood there calmly staring at him.

Although he didn't like it, Emmett working for their father didn't really surprise Edward. If things had worked out differently then he probably would have been working there too as it had always been their father's plan that they would both follow in his footsteps. It hadn't occurred to him before that Emmett would be working there as there had been so much else going on that he hadn't once thought about the fact Emmett was missing work. So although it didn't surprise him, it just confirmed that at some point soon Emmett would be gone. There was no way their father would allow him to stay in contact once he knew where Emmett had been and he would find out. He always did.

"Where does he think you are?" He asked, wondering just how much longer he'd have his brother around for.

"We told him I went on a last minute holiday. I went back there yesterday to pretend to be home and told them a friend had asked me to move in as they suddenly had an empty room when the previous flatmate left unexpectedly while we were gone." Emmett explained feeling proud of the story he'd come up with but Edward's calmness was still making him wary.

"He believed that?" Edward questioned as to him it seemed like a pretty weak story and their father had never been stupid. He should have seen straight through Emmett's lies and he was surprised they hadn't already been found out.

"He's busy at work, don't think he really took much notice. Beside's why wouldn't he? I'm twenty three so it's not like it would be unusual for me to move out." Emmett responded with a shrug but that just brought up more questions for Edward.

"Why don't you then? Surely my sofa can't be that comfortable to sleep on."

"It's not that bad and you need me here right now." Emmett blew the question off but it didn't stop Edward feeling bad about it and it didn't clear up what would happen in the future as if he'd told their parent's he'd moved out to live with friends then what would he do when Edward was better? He couldn't live on their sofa forever.

"What happens when I'm better then?"

"I don't know, I guess I either go home or actually look for a place of my own. I like staying with you guys though so maybe we could look for a bigger flat together." Emmett suggested easily taking Edward by surprise.

"You'd really want to do that?"

"Sure, I know you like your space so I wouldn't be offended if you didn't want to but I like being here and I'd be able to be around easier if you needed a baby sitter." He answered wondering why Edward looked so stunned by his words.

Edward had never even thought about that as an option. He'd just assumed that at some point Emmett would be gone and they'd be on their own again but now Emmett had suggested it he did like the idea. The only problem was he knew it wouldn't be possible. He only just had enough money to cover the rent and bills on their flat and he knew he paid only a fraction of what the other tenants in the block did thanks to the landlord's soft spot for Lucy. There was no way he'd be able to stretch to even half the rent of a bigger flat, especially as he knew Emmett wouldn't want to settle somewhere like they currently were and he wouldn't feel right letting Emmett pay for more than his share. As he came to that conclusion he realised it was all pointless anyway as their father would find out where Emmett was and would order him away. If Emmett refused he'd most likely lose his job so there'd be no new flat anyway. Emmett however was standing there looking pleased with himself for his idea and Edward didn't have the heart to shatter his illusions of everything working out ok so he didn't voice his opinions and just let the subject drop as he picked up the iron again.

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><p>"You're quiet this morning. Everything ok?" Bella asked as they stood by the school gates. Esme was with them that morning and the girls were keeping her occupied as it was a novelty to them to have her there leaving Bella and Edward free to talk. While he'd greeted her with his usual hug he'd just stood quietly after that, not even really watching Lucy since Esme was watching her, preferring to stare at his feet with his hands jammed in his pockets and a frown on his face. It was the Edward she'd first met, not the one she knew now.<p>

"Emmett's back at work today." He answered, glancing up at her and letting her see the mix of emotions in his eyes. He really didn't look happy which surprised her considering how against having Emmett there he'd been and how irritable he got at having someone around all the time. She would have thought he'd be pleased to have some time to himself again yet his whole demeanour that morning suggested things had changed or there was something else bothering him.

"That's a bad thing?" She questioned only for Edward to shrug and kick at a stone on the pavement, making it clatter off the wall.

"He works for Dad." He muttered and just saying that made his eyes darken slightly with anger and his posture stiffen making it clear that it wasn't Emmett going back to work that was upsetting him but the fact he was going to be around their father.

"Ah, and you think he's going to say something to Emmett?" She questioned and watched the anger wash out as his shoulders slumped in despair and he kicked at the stone again.

"I know he is. As soon as he finds out where he's staying, and he will find out." He answered miserably so Bella took a step closer and tugged on his arm to get him to look at her before taking his hand, reminding him that he still had her no matter what.

"Emmett won't listen." She tried to sooth him thinking that the determination Emmett had shown to look after Edward so far would make it hard for their dad to change his mind but Edward knew he wouldn't have a choice. Their father always got what he wanted.

"He'll fire him if he doesn't." He mumbled wishing that he didn't care if Emmett stayed or not but he did and he couldn't be responsible for Emmett losing his job. He'd already gone out of his way to help them and that wouldn't be a very good way to repay him. If their father did give Emmett that ultimatum the only thing he'd be able to do was tell Emmett to go. They'd been fine without him before and he hadn't even had Esme and Carlisle then. Looking down to his hand that enclosed Bella's much smaller and softer one and concentrating on the feel of her skin against his reminded him that he'd still have her as well. His anger that had made it possible for him to get by without his family before may be gone in relation to Emmett and Alice but they did have other people around now, he wouldn't be on his own like before.

"You don't know for sure he'll find out. They've kept it quiet this long. There's no point in worrying over it until something actually happens." Bella tried once more to reassure him and heard him sigh in response. When he lifted his gaze back to hers she could see the walls coming back up as he closed himself off from his emotions in an attempt to ignore it all. She hated that look.

"I just wish he didn't work for him." He muttered sullenly. He'd been trying to let it go and just enjoy the last of the time he had with Emmett around but he just couldn't get past thinking about what it would be like without him there again. If he'd worked for anyone else then maybe they would have stood a chance at keeping their father in the dark but there was just no way that would happen with Emmett seeing him almost every day. Their time together was definitely limited.

"I know." She responded before wrapping her free arm around the one that held her hand and letting her head rest against his shoulder in an attempt to offer some form of comfort as she knew how much he seemed to enjoy contact. She wished there was something more she could do but she couldn't change who Emmett worked for or the cruel mentality of that man. The most she could do was just be there for Edward when he needed a friend and right then seemed to be one of those times. "Do you want me to come round tonight for a while?"

"No college work?" Edward asked and hearing the surprise in his voice she looked up at him to see the hint of a smile on his face.

"Nope, not tonight. How about I bring a couple of DVDs over again?" She asked loving the way his eyes lit up at the suggestion. If cheering him up only took a night of DVDs she'd happily do it every day to keep him smiling instead of drowning in worries.

"I'd like that."

"Good, I'll come round as soon as Mum gets home and I'll even cook if you want" She offered knowing how much he liked her cooking.

"Thank you." He said, leaning down to kiss her head. It was another new affectionate gesture for them and though Edward seemed to do it without really thinking, it sent a thrill through Bella making her blush slightly. She really liked the more affectionate side of him that was gradually appearing and couldn't wait to see more of it.

The shrill ringing of the school bell brought them out of their bubble as they both remembered they had little girls that would be waiting to say goodbye to them. Quickly separating from each other they rejoined Esme and while Edward got his usual hug and kiss from Lucy, Bella barely had chance to say goodbye before Anna was running into the school apparently not that interested in saying goodbye to her sister so she looked back over to Edward and Lucy.

"Remember Esme is picking you up tonight." She caught Edward saying which made her even more glad she'd offered to visit as if she hadn't she wouldn't have gotten to see Edward again that day. Emmett going back to work was going to drastically cut down her time with Edward if he could no longer come to the school each day. She hoped he'd be feeling well enough to walk it again soon so she could see him more often but in the mean time she'd definitely be shuffling her college work around so she could spend more evenings with him.

"I know Daddy, you don't have to worry." Lucy responded making Bella smile with her assumption that he was worrying over her getting home safely.

"I'll always worry about you sweetheart but go on in or you'll be late." He said, hugging her one last time.

"Love you Daddy." She chirped before pulling out of his arms and running into school, not waiting for him to return the sentiment as she already knew he did and he was right, she would be late.

"You two are so adorable." Esme commented as he watched Lucy leave.

"I've heard that before." He said turning away from the school to glance at Bella with the crooked smile and sparkling eyes that caused her to smile back at him.

"Well you are." She laughed just making him shake his head at the both of them.

"We have to get going Edward, I have to be in work soon." Esme reluctantly said, not wanting to drag Edward away but knowing she couldn't be late and she still had to drive him home. She was happy to drive them but she really couldn't linger too long at the gates like Emmett had.

"I'll see you tonight then, have a good day." Bella said a hurried goodbye while Edward hugged her. When he pulled away he was still smiling and when he followed Esme back to her car he turned just before he got in to wave to her as she still stood by the gates so she waved back before she turned and left as well.

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><p>Edward was restless. He couldn't remember the last time he'd been in his flat by himself. Usually when Lucy was in school he'd have been at work so he'd never actually been there without her until he'd gotten ill and then he'd got Emmett around all the time. While he thought he liked being on his own he was quickly discovering that he'd been mistaken. He may have liked being on his own with Lucy but being completely by himself was a whole different matter. There was nothing to do, the housework having already been completed by Emmett in an attempt to make Edward continue to take things easy even without supervision and other than Lucy's toys or the daytime TV he'd already seen too much of there was nothing else to do. The resulting boredom and lack of noise in the flat just brought out his paranoia and he found himself hovering by the living room window and jumping at every noise he heard, half expecting James to appear now he was on his own.<p>

He did his best to get a handle on himself and calm down by texting Bella but she was in lectures so her responses were slow and far apart not allowing him to stay distracted. When there was a crash from the neighbours just before their usual arguing started up the thundering heart beat and laboured breathing it caused made Edward glad there was no one there to see it or he was sure they'd be trying to force anti-anxiety medication on him. Knowing that he couldn't be a falling apart panicky mess when Lucy came home he gave in to the mocking stare of the television screen and turned it on. If nothing else it would hide the random noises that were making him so jumpy.

Even with the TV on, the instant Esme knocked on the door Edward was racing through the flat to answer it and he swept Lucy into his arms before they'd even registered the door was open.

"Hi Daddy." She giggled, happily wrapping her arms around his neck to hug him back.

"Missed you Luce." He mumbled into her hair but the tone of his voice set alarm bells off so she leant back, put her hands on each side of his face and made him look at her.

"You look weird." She announced, not really sure what was wrong but knowing something wasn't right.

"Well that's nice." He grumbled as he carried her through to the living room.

"She's right. How are you feeling?" Esme asked as she followed them, there was a slightly crazed look to his eyes that wasn't right.

"I'm fine, just glad to see you guys." He answered hoping to make Lucy giggle again but she was able to read him better than that and looked at him with narrowed eyes.

"Did the bad man come here?" She asked catching Esme's attention as they both studied Edward's reaction.

"No, it's been quiet here. I just got a little lonely." He sighed giving into the fact he'd have to admit he couldn't get through one day on his own without freaking out just so that they wouldn't think it was something worse. He did not want Lucy thinking they weren't safe in their own home.

"Is that why Bella's coming over?" Lucy asked liking the way her daddy smiled at just the sound of Bella's name.

"Yes, she even said she'd cook for us so we need to get your homework done before she gets here." He answered finally feeling himself settling down so he put Lucy down, letting her get rid of her shoes and coat while he offered Esme a cup of tea.

"I'm sorry, I'd love to stay a little longer but I've really got to run. We're having some problems sourcing some material we need and I really need to be in the office. I still want you to call if you need anything though." She answered pulling him into a brief hug before she left feeling a lot better about not be able to stay knowing Bella would be visiting.

Edward and Lucy sat at the kitchen table as she worked through her maths homework. He didn't really need to be there as she very rarely needed help with maths but after his day alone he just wanted to be near her and he enjoyed listening to her tales from school. It was really nice to spend time as just the two of them and he could tell by the constant smile on Lucy's face that she was enjoying it too.

Lucy had just packed away her completed maths homework when Edward's mobile rang. Not used to hearing it they both stared at the phone where it sat on the table before Edward reached for it and saw Emmett's name flashing on the screen. He answered it apprehensively, dread filling him as he wondered at the reason for the unexpected call and he wasn't surprised when Lucy reached over to grab his hand. Hearing Emmett's tired voice inform him he had to stay late came as a relief and he smiled gently to Lucy and squeezed her hand lightly to let her know that everything was ok. Satisfied it wasn't bad news on the other end of the phone Lucy jumped up from her seat and gathered her school things together to put away, stopping as she passed Edward to kiss his cheek while Emmett continued explaining something to do with sorting out files which meant he wouldn't be home in time to make dinner. When Edward told him Bella was cooking anyway Emmett begged him to save him some for when he got home and just before Emmett was about to hang up Edward found himself unintentionally asking if he'd seen their father letting Emmett know he was still concerned about it. Although he had seen him and spoken to him he told Edward truthfully that everything was ok and he didn't suspect anything yet it did little to put Edward's mind at rest. He would still be waiting for it all to fall apart until the very moment that it did.

When Lucy came back through they'd ended the call and Edward was putting the kettle on for another cup of tea so she climbed back onto her seat to wait for him. He told her Emmett was going to be home late and she didn't seem too concerned, just asking when Bella would be there. Not really sure of the answer to that one he suggested they watched TV for a while as they waited for her which Lucy happily agreed to, loving any excuse to cuddle up to her daddy.

Bella arrived shortly after five to find a much more relaxed Edward than Esme and Lucy had come home to. He was smiling and laughing easily with Lucy making Bella wish she'd been there to see what they'd been up to, to put him into such a good mood. As it was though she found herself laughing along with them as they teased each other before Edward sent Lucy off to find some toys to play with for a while and lead Bella into the kitchen, quickly enveloping her in a hug once they got there.

"I'm glad you could come." He told her once he'd pulled back to look at her. Converse, scruffy jeans, a light blue t-shirt with a loose neckline that allowed it to slide down one shoulder a little and her long hair left down made him want to just stand and stare at her for a while, especially when his gaze made her blush. She was perfectly simple and it was just right for him.

"So am I. You look like you're in a much better mood than this morning. You're first day alone go well?" She asked trying to take his focus away from herself, not used to having someone pay so much attention to her. She could feel his gaze sticking on her bare shoulder and the t-shirt that had seemed plain and a little boring when she'd put it on suddenly felt revealing. It made her want to tug at it and cover up her skin as she wasn't used to someone looking at her quite like that and feeling the stirrings of excitement as a result. She wasn't sure what to do with it so it manifested as a blush to her cheeks letting Edward know that his gaze was having an effect on her whether she wanted him to know or not.

"Not really but we've enjoyed it just being the two of us since Lucy got home." He answered and as he remembered what the morning had been like it enabled him to pull his gaze away from Bella.

"What about before Lucy got home?" Bella asked sensing there was something wrong there which was confirmed when Edward grimaced and ran a hand through his hair.

"I don't think I like being on my own. I'm usually at work when Lucy's in school." He mumbled turning away from her to play with the kettle. He wasn't sure he wanted to let her know how badly he'd freaked out but they all kept telling him to talk about things and he'd rather tell her than Emmett. She always managed to make him feel better.

"What happened?" She asked, moving over to him and taking hold of his hand. When he looked down at her and all he saw was concern for him he sighed and leaned back against the units to face her.

"I freaked out I guess. There's nothing to do here without Lucy around and Emmett's done all the housework to make sure I don't. It was too quiet and every little noise made me jump. I don't know why but it just made me paranoid that they'd be here." He told her miserably so she wrapped her arms around him, offering the comfort he'd needed hours ago.

"I'm sure it'll get easier and you'll be back at work soon anyway. Considering you only seem to get hurt when you're on your own it's not surprising it made you paranoid." She comforted, knowing she'd probably have been a mess if she'd been in his shoes. He may not have liked it or even admitted it but having Emmett around was safer, suddenly being on his own must have felt like being left out in the open.

"Can't wait to get back to work." He muttered making Bella smile a little as everyone already knew how eager he was to go back there.

"Keep taking it easy this week and I'm sure it won't be long before Carlisle says it's ok." She commented.

"I feel fine now." He grumbled really wishing he could just go to work the following day rather than having to spend it in the flat on his own again but he knew Garrett wouldn't let him until Carlisle had said he was well enough.

"I know but that might not last long if you go back to work now." Bella cautioned making Edward sigh before he held her a little closer.

"You're right but I still wish I could be in work."

"You will be soon but for now maybe we should think about getting some food cooking." She said, reaching up quickly to kiss his cheek before she pulled away so go and investigate their cupboards. Edward watched her with a soft smile thinking he was really lucky to have her there. She really did look spectacular in his kitchen and if he'd needed anymore distractions to get his thoughts away from that morning she certainly gave him plenty of other, much more pleasant things to think about.

After dinner Lucy wanted to play a game and unable to say no to her when she looked at them both with wide pleading eyes she ran off to her room to get one out, returning with monopoly much to Edward's surprise. She'd never wanted to play it before and he was pretty sure that was because she'd been too young to really understand it but she was insistent it was what she wanted to play so they joined her on the floor as she started to empty out the contents from the box. Quickly claiming the position of banker Edward sorted out all the money before dealing it out so they could start. It didn't take long for them to get immersed into the game, there was plenty of laughter as Lucy conned Edward out of several streets and it became apparent both the girls had teamed up against him when he was the first to go bankrupt thanks to Lucy owning Mayfair and Park Lane. The game continued though and Edward enjoyed watching Lucy and Bella together. It was a fairer match as they couldn't convince each other to trade streets by pouting or using sad eyes which he'd fallen for far too easily. He was surprised when Lucy didn't get bored but she seemed to enjoy playing against Bella and her maths skills were definitely impressive as she didn't struggle with the money at all. The game eventually came to a close with a gloating Lucy as Bella also fell afoul of Mayfair with a hotel.

"Next time we play this, don't let her sweet talk you out of the purple ones. She's ruthless." Bella laughed as they sat back and watched Lucy pack it all away with a large smile still firmly in place.

"I can't help it, I can't say no to her when she looks at me like that. I think she's inherited Emmett's competitive side though, he always wins as well." Edward responded.

"I'll remember not to ever play against him then. I can't believe we've both just been beaten by a five year old though. Did we ought to be worried?" She asked lightly, she'd known Lucy was bright, but she hadn't expected her to be quite so smart when it came to monopoly. Anna certainly wouldn't have gotten on so well with it.

"Probably and we won't hear the end of it when Emmett finds out." He answered, "In fact I think it's bed time for her, that way she can't tell him until tomorrow."

"Hmm I think I like that plan. When's he due home anyway?"

"I'm not sure, he called and said he had to work late. To be honest I thought he'd be back by now though. I'll get Lucy into bed then we can watch a DVD if you've still got time?" He asked, standing up and looking at her hopefully. When she nodded with a large smile and moved to settle down on the sofa instead of the floor Edward grinned before turning to Lucy and telling her it was bedtime. She tried to argue but the yawn that took her over had Edward laughing and insisting that it was indeed time for bed. In reluctant agreement she put the lid on the monopoly box and ran across to Bella to give her a hug and thank her for playing before she let Edward herd her to her room to get ready for bed.

Once Lucy was asleep Edward left her room and hurried back to the living room where he found Bella had already set up the DVD and was just waiting for him to start it. Sitting down beside her he waited until she'd pressed play on the remote before wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her down to rest against him. She happily melted into his side and he let his head drop to rest lightly on top of hers.

"I like this." He sighed happily wanting Bella to know how happy having her around made him. Having tucked his daughter into bed and coming back to Bella waiting for him was the kind of thing he'd never dreamed he'd be able to have.

"I do too." She commented, shuffling slightly so she could glance up at him as he looked at her thoughtfully.

"You don't mind having to spend so much time with Lucy?" He asked lifting a strand of her hair and twirling it round his finger. It was really soft and silky.

"No, I love spending time with her."

"Are you sure? I know it's not the same as going on a proper date but I like spending time with you like this." He asked wanting to know if he was already falling short of her expectations. If she wanted more and he couldn't give it he'd let her go but if that was the case it would be better to know sooner rather than later.

"Yes I'm sure. I like being around you and Lucy and I don't need to be taken out on dates to enjoy myself. To be honest I prefer quiet nights in anyway, I'm not really into getting dressed up for going out." She answered and was glad when she felt Edward relax again. His insecurities still seemed all too eager to make appearances and she really didn't want him to feel like that around her. At least talking about it was an improvement on him just closing himself off and backing away though. It really did feel like he'd totally invested himself in them having a relationship and that thought made her indescribably happy. As Edward stayed quiet it seemed his worries had been settled so she relaxed back against him, loving the feel of his arm around her as they watched the film. Wanting a little more contact, just to reassure him more and feel the strange tingle that skin on skin contact caused she lifted her hand up to intertwine her fingers with his where they rested on her clothed shoulder. He rested his head back against hers and tightened his arm around her just a little bit more to pull her in closer in response. Quiet nights in, cuddled on the sofa, were definitely her more preferred way to spend an evening.

Bella was jerked awake by the pocket of her jeans vibrating. Confused as to why her face was pressed into something warm and solid that smelt wonderful it took her a moment to realise she'd dozed off at Edward's whilst they were watching a film. At some point she must have managed to turn around to end up with her face buried against his chest and as she pushed herself away slightly, feeling her cheeks burning in embarrassment she noticed that his arm was still wrapped around her and when she could finally see his face again, amused green eyes were sparkling down at her.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep." She mumbled reaching up to brush her hair back from her face only Edward beat her to it and the gentle touch of his fingers against her cheeks only served to keep her blush in place.

"It's ok but you might want to answer that." He said and she could hear the laughter in his voice as she jumped from the vibrations of her phone again. Glancing at him once more before looking down to retrieve her phone she wanted to curse whoever was calling her as he really didn't seem to mind the fact she'd been so cuddled into him and if it hadn't been for the annoying vibrations of her phone she could have stayed there a little longer and enjoyed it.

"It's Rosalie." She muttered as she pulled the phone out of her pocket and saw the display. At the same time she answered the call they heard the front door opening announcing Emmett's arrival so she got up, nodding towards the kitchen so Edward knew she was going in there to take the call.

Edward watched her go, smile still in place. They hadn't been that far into the movie when he'd noticed Bella's breathing deepen slightly and had glanced down to find her eyes closed. He'd been surprised at first as he'd seen no signs that she'd been tired but then it had amused him as it was nice for it not to be him that was falling asleep for a change. Watching her had quickly taken his attention away from the TV as he could freely study her without her noticing and he wanted to take full advantage of that. After a while of just watching her being so peaceful she mumbled something that sounded like his name before she'd moved, turning so that her face nestled into his chest as she pulled his arm further around her by their linked fingers. She'd settled down again there until her phone went off and he couldn't help but be amused by her startled expression when she'd woken up. She'd called him adorable before but that convinced him she was the adorable one. He'd have been quite content to just sit and watch her sleeping for the rest of the night if it hadn't been for Rosalie's call.

Now though Emmett was slumping down into what Edward had come to think of as his chair looking exhausted. His suit jacket was slung over the arm of the chair and he was tugging at his tie to loosen it.

"Bad day?" He asked thinking that Emmett looked far removed from his usual easy going, jovial appearance. Being in a suit and serious really didn't suit him and as he fought his way out of the constraining tie Edward felt sure Emmett hated his job.

"Same as every work day. Dad seems to have stored up all the really horrible jobs for me while I was away." Emmett sighed while rubbing at his eyes. He'd spent the day sorting out a mountain of filing and being sent to pick up various coffees and sandwiches. His father may not have known just where he'd been but it was blatantly obvious he did not approve of his sudden three week holiday. He'd barely said a word to him other than to bark out orders and make scathing comments on the coffees he didn't even drink. Emmett was beginning to think it really was time to start looking for a different job.

"Do you want a cup of tea? Or we saved you some dinner if you want that heated up." Edward asked deciding to ignore the mention of their father. He'd been having a nice evening with Bella so far and he didn't want to let him ruin that. Emmett didn't look like he'd favour talking more about his work anyway.

"Thanks, I can get it though. Did Bella go home already?" Emmett asked, moving to push himself up in the hope that food would make him feel a bit better but Edward shook his head and stood up first.

"She's still here, I'll go get it." He answered quickly before disappearing into the kitchen. Seeing the smile on Edward's face as he left Emmett assumed that was where Bella was and he was glad Edward was having a good evening. He'd been worried about him being on his own for the day and it had made him even more disgruntled when he'd realised he'd be staying at work late as he'd just wanted to get back home and check everything was ok.

Edward reappeared carrying a plate of shepherd's pie which he handed over and Emmett sighed happily as he took his first bite.

"This is amazing, you have got to keep her around. What's she doing through there anyway?" He asked thinking that Bella had to be the best cook he'd ever come across. Everything she made tasted so good.

"I plan to and Rosalie rang her." Edward answered causing Emmett to perk up even more at the mention of Rosalie.

"What are they talking about?" He asked eagerly wanting to know more about Bella's blonde bombshell of a friend. Edward however shrugged.

"No idea, sounds like she was trying to persuade Bella into doing something she wasn't keen on." He answered as when he'd been in the kitchen Bella had been saying no repeatedly while frowning. She'd smiled at him when he'd lightly brushed a hand against her hip as he'd passed her in the kitchen though so he assumed whatever they were arguing about hadn't been too serious.

Bella returned before Emmett could ask anything else and happily moved back to her spot beside Edward.

"Rosalie wants us all to go out Friday night." She sighed seeing both Edward and Emmett's curious gazes.

"Out where?" Emmett asked eagerly while Bella watched Edward's smile fall into a frown.

"Eclipse." Bella answered and while Emmett seemed to recognize the name of the club Edward showed no sign of knowing where or what it was.

"Well I'm up for it, I haven't been to that club in ages but it was always good." Emmett responded but Bella was more concerned by Edward's reaction.

"I told her I didn't want to go and that you probably wouldn't so we don't have to if you don't want to. I only mentioned it because she made me promise I'd ask, she really doesn't know how to take no for an answer." She said but with what he'd said earlier she knew what he'd be thinking. Rosalie really knew how to pick her moment.

"Who else is going?" Edward asked quietly as he wasn't totally against the idea but he was wary of it.

"I'm not sure, probably some of Rosalie's friends and if you wanted to go I was thinking we could ask Alice, Jasper and Peter." Bella suggested thinking he'd feel more comfortable if they had their friends there but she really wouldn't mind if he didn't want to go at all. He seemed to wavering in his thoughts though as he looked between Bella and Emmett before glancing to the doorway that led to the corridor.

"Esme would love to babysit I bet." Emmett jumped in guessing what he was thinking and hoping to take away the major obstacle of Lucy's care as he really wanted to see Rosalie again.

"I don't know, the last time I went out it really didn't end well." Edward finally said hesitantly. Bella may have said she was happy spending their nights in but he did want to go out places with her and he didn't want to be the one making her disappoint her friends. The lure of seeing her dressed up was also strong as she'd looked so beautiful in the dress she'd worn for Anna's birthday party. He was sure Emmett was right about Esme wanting to babysit too so the only problem was a club full of loud music, alcohol and drunk people was highly likely to make him uncomfortable and he didn't want to ruin everyone else's fun by freaking out on them.

"We'd all be there, nothing bad would happen, I wouldn't let it." Emmett responded quickly seeing that Edward was close to agreeing to go and just needed a little more persuasion.

"You really don't have to go Edward." Bella said while glaring at Emmett for trying to encourage him. If he didn't want to go, he shouldn't have to and she wouldn't let Emmett's desire to see Rosalie force him to.

"I kind of want to." Edward mumbled making Emmett grin and Bella frown.

"You're not just saying that because you think I want to go are you because I really don't mind."

"No. I want to go out, Emmett's right, it would be fun if only to see Rosalie turn him down." He answered managing a shaky smile. The more he thought about it, the more he wanted to go.

"I guess you're right there but only if you're sure you're ok with it and we can come home as soon as you want to." Bella responded still not convinced it was a good idea but willing to go if Edward wanted to. It would get Rosalie off her back anyway and dancing with Edward might even be fun.

"Great! Oh and who says Rosalie will turn me down?" Emmett cut in before anyone could change their minds. He was positive it was going to be a good night and it would certainly give him something to look forward to while struggling through work all week.

"Rosalie." Bella answered smugly making Edward laugh at the indignant expression on Emmett's face. He really couldn't wait to see Emmett make a fool of himself, he just hoped the rest of the night would be just as fun and he wouldn't end up regretting it. One thing was certain, he would not be drinking.


	32. Chapter 30 Unexpected

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

AN - Sorry about the wait on this chapter, it was an important one and I didn't want to rush it.

Thank you to everyone who continues to read and review.

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><p><strong>Chapter 30 – Unexpected<strong>

As the week continued Edward couldn't decide whether he'd made the right decision in saying he'd go out with everyone. While he was looking forward to spending the night with Bella, the long days spent in the flat on his own had given him too long to spend thinking about all the things that could go wrong. He tried his best to think positively but the uneasiness and paranoia hadn't improved much which made it all too easy for him to start concocting various scenarios in his head for what would happen. Plenty of them began by having a nice time laughing with Bella, maybe even asking her to dance as an excuse to hold her closely but they invariably drifted off into watching everyone getting drunk around them, triggering his fears and forcing him to flee or James would turn up and he wouldn't be able to get out fast enough. He was also concerned over what Rosalie's friends would make of him as he didn't want to embarrass Bella and if he did end up getting more flashbacks they wouldn't understand. Overall there were more things that could go wrong than right and then there was the issue of leaving Lucy for the evening.

Esme had happily agreed to take care of her and Carlisle would even be joining her once he finished his shift at the hospital but it didn't stop Edward from worrying. He'd told Lucy that he'd be going out and although she'd tried to hide it, he'd seen the fear flash through her eyes. As they'd explained that he'd be with Bella, Emmett and their other friends she'd managed a shaky smile and had even seemed a little excited about spending the night with Esme and Carlisle but Edward had seen that first flash of fear and hadn't been able to get it out of his head. He knew what she was thinking, the last time they'd attempted to spend the night apart he'd ended up in hospital and although she was obviously being brave he wasn't sure he could be. She'd be perfectly safe with Esme and Carlisle, he trusted them and they knew what they were doing and he'd be safe with Emmett around as he was physically imposing so most people stayed well clear of him and the crowd would deter James and his friends but the anxiety of being separated from Lucy would still be there no matter how much reassurance they both had.

They needed to move on though, they couldn't live with fear and anxiety forever and it was his job to prove to Lucy that everything would be ok. He knew deep down the co-dependency they shared while comforting and familiar was not entirely healthy. They had to be able to cope with being apart and in many ways a night out would be the perfect way to make a start to getting things back on track. The time in their lives to be holed away together had been unexpectedly pulled apart and he'd be letting Lucy down if he didn't try to make the most of it for them. He had to push through his fears, if not for himself then for Lucy so when Emmett arrived home from work late on Friday evening it was to find Esme sitting in the kitchen reading a magazine but the rest of the flat oddly quiet.

"Where's Edward and Lucy?" He asked once they'd said hello and Esme had set her magazine down. Usually at that time they'd have either been in the kitchen eating dinner or in the living room watching TV.

"In his room, Lucy's helping him choose what to wear tonight." She answered and he could see the concern in her eyes even though she seemed to be trying to appear relaxed and indifferent.

"How's he doing?" He asked as he knew how much Edward had been stressing out over their plans. He had hoped he'd have calmed down a little as he got used to the idea but so far that hadn't seemed to have happened.

"He says he's ok." Esme shrugged, toying with the edge of her magazine.

"But?" Emmett prodded, wondering why Esme was being so reluctant to say what was on her mind. She was usually pretty open and blunt if she had something to say.

"I know how much you want to go out, and I think deep down he does too but I'm not sure he's ready for it. He's trying to be fine but you can see it in his eyes, he's scared." She answered making Emmett sigh as he slumped in his chair and tiredly rubbed at his eyes.

"We can still cancel, Bella wouldn't mind."

"I told him that but he's determined to go. He doesn't want to let any of you down." She said no longer even sure what the right thing to do would be. If he went out and something went wrong he'd be devastated with himself but the same seemed to be true if they cancelled it altogether. That was why she'd been reluctant to speak out about it, there was no longer a clear choice so all she could do was worry about the outcome and warn Emmett in the hope he could avoid anything too detrimental.

"He's so stubborn. I should never have pushed him into saying yes but I thought it would be good for him. To get out and have some child free fun for once, you know?" He muttered wishing that for once his good intentions could pay off rather than just making things harder for Edward. Trying to help him was like trying to navigate a mine field without a map, there were no safe paths.

"I know you meant well, just keep an eye on him and bring him home if he's not coping well with it. He'll probably calm down a little once he's around Bella, she seems to have a soothing effect on him." Esme responded not wanting Emmett to feel too guilty over it. He may have encouraged Edward but she couldn't fault him for wanting his brother to have some fun. It was just like what she'd done with the zoo tickets but it was unfortunate that what was common practise for people their age would make Edward feel uncomfortable.

"I hope your right and I'll bring him home at the first sign of something being wrong. Bella will be watching him too I should imagine." Emmett answered while pulling at his tie to loosen it. If it hadn't been for the worries about Edward he would have been looking forward to getting out of his suit and into the club to unwind a little even if he wouldn't be drinking. Knowing how nervous Edward was he knew it would be best to stay clear of alcohol with him so that not only would he feel less out of place being the only one not drinking but it would allow Emmett to be more alert if anything did happen. It wasn't just Edward who had been thinking about all the things that could go wrong and if like Edward feared, the guys who hurt him did turn up, he wanted to be in a fit state to put an end to it all. Hopefully though the no drinking would just result in them having plenty of designated drivers as he knew Bella was intending to stay sober as well.

"Uncle Emmett!"

Lucy's cheer interrupted their conversation as she charged into the kitchen and headed straight for him with her arms open for a hug. He picked her up as she reached him, making her giggle as he settled her on his lap.

"Hey Little Luce. How was your day?" He asked thinking it was a good sign that she was so cheerful as if something was really wrong with Edward she'd be feeling it too.

"It was good! I got all my maths homework right and I finished my reading book." She told him cheerfully before scowling a little, "I got a new reading book too."

"Well that's really good and I'm sure you'll do well with the new book too. Where's your daddy?" He asked wondering why she'd appeared by herself. Edward was normally never far behind.

"He's in the shower. I helped him pick what to wear tonight." She told him proudly making Emmett smile a little.

"Will he look good for Bella then?" He asked and she nodded vigorously.

"Yup, I made him wear the pretty clothes Auntie Alice gave him." She answered and Emmett couldn't wait to see Alice's reaction to that news. Edward was going to have his work cut out for him once Alice started to introduce Lucy to fashion. She'd been looking for someone to pass on her enthusiasm for the subject to for quite some time. Having two brothers had been quite the disappointment.

"I'm sure he'll look really good then. Are you looking forward to spending time with Esme and Carlisle tonight?" He asked and she nodded but the enthusiasm was diminished a little.

"Will you and Daddy be home for bedtime?" She asked quietly and he could see the worry on her face. Even if they managed to calm Edward down it was clear Lucy would be hard for Esme and Carlisle to settle.

"I don't think so Luce but you'll see us in the morning and I'm sure your daddy will check on you before he goes to bed." He answered to which she nodded again.

"We're going to have so much fun tonight Lucy that you won't even notice they're gone." Esme added as she'd brought round a bag full of craft materials and scraps of fabrics so they could make some clothes for Lucy's dolls or just create pretty pictures. There was plenty of glitter and glue in the bag as Edward had told her about Lucy's love for art projects including those things and she fully intended on keeping Lucy distracted for the night.

"Can I help you cook?" Lucy asked, brightening up as she turned her attention to Esme.

"Of course you can sweetheart." She answered and that seemed to cheer Lucy up enough that she didn't ask any further questions about the planned night out as she helped Esme decide what to make for dinner instead.

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><p>Edward stood in the shower waiting for the warm water to relax him. He'd thought letting Lucy help him decide what to wear would help but it hadn't as she'd gone straight for the clothes Alice had bought him. He could see why she'd picked them as they were much nicer than anything else he owned but it just highlighted how out of place he was going to be. Not wanting to give in to Alice's charity he'd turned to his usual clothes but the worn and now ill fitting fabric clashed with what he envisioned Rosalie's friends to be like and he didn't want to embarrass Bella or Emmett so he'd reluctantly agreed to Lucy's suggestions. He really didn't want to go anymore but that made him more determined to go through with it. The desire to be normal was too strong and he had a lot to prove to himself, Lucy and Bella. He just had to be able to do this.<p>

With a sigh he climbed out of the shower knowing that it wasn't going to work. He was just too nervous and the only thing that stood a chance of calming him down now was Bella so he was grateful that she and Emmett had decided it would be best to meet up earlier for dinner before heading onto the club where they'd join everyone else. He'd kept quiet as they'd made the plans not wanting to be the cause of extra expense for Emmett as he'd automatically taken responsibility for the meal but he hadn't been able to protest when he'd thought what the extra time with just him and Bella would do for him. If he'd walked into the club as nervous as he was he knew it would just be asking for trouble but having the chance to ease into it a little ought to help.

When he was dressed in the outfit Lucy had chosen he joined them all in the kitchen, fidgeting with the shirt and feeling incredibly uncomfortable in the new clothes but the warm smile from Esme as she looked him over and the grin on Lucy's face made him stop his fidgeting a little.

"Looking good Edward." Emmett commented lightly as he stood up, making Edward blush a little but Emmett ignored that, already on his way out of the kitchen. "I'm going to go get ready myself."

"You know if you don't want to go you really don't have to." Esme said as soon as Emmett had left the room and Edward had started to fidget again.

"I want to go, I just...it's hard." He sighed, raking a hand through his hair which he hadn't even attempted to tame. Considering how nervous he was he knew there would have been no point as it would have been a mess ten minutes later and he got the impression Bella liked his hair just the way it was anyway.

"Well just make sure you come home if you feel you need to. Don't try to stick it out just for other people's benefit." She cautioned only for Edward to nod and she could see by the set of his jaw that he wouldn't really take any notice. As Emmett had said, he was far too stubborn and seemed determined to see the night through to the end.

It didn't take long for Emmett to get ready and by then Esme and Lucy were half way through cooking their dinner. Edward had been attempting to just watch them and not let his mind wander but as soon as Emmett reappeared he felt the nerves flood back in.

"Are you ready to go?" Emmett asked as although it was still on the early side for a night out, they'd agreed to pick Bella up on their way to the restaurant that Emmett had chosen. It had been suggested that they use taxis for the night but Emmett wanted to have the car there if they needed it and since he wasn't planning to drink the only problem it would cause was finding a parking space.

"I guess, come here Luce." He answered, standing up and holding his arms out for Lucy to run into. "Be good for Esme and Carlisle."

"I will Daddy." She responded, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck as he picked her up and she buried her face into his chest. She didn't want him to leave. "Love you."

"I love you too baby." He mumbled into her hair as he kissed her head and took a deep steadying breath of her scent. He could do this, he needed to do it and Lucy needed to see that they could spend an evening apart without him being hurt. It would be good for them both.

"Tell Bella hello." Lucy said as Edward gently set her down only for her to hug him tightly around his waist.

"I will and everything's going to be just fine tonight so no worrying." He said managing to find a smile as he ruffled her hair, making her look up at him and giggle a little.

"Ok, bye bye Daddy."

"Bye bye sweetheart, have fun with Esme." He responded before Lucy allowed him to turn to Esme and say goodbye and then she followed them as Emmett lead the way to the front door and stood in the doorway waving with Esme hovering behind her until they'd entered the stairway and gone out of sight.

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><p>Bella was pacing nervously in front of her living room window waiting to spot Emmett's car pull up outside. She didn't have a very good feeling for the night, almost positive that something would go wrong along the way. Even without having seen a great deal of Edward in the week as he'd only been at the school gates in the morning it had been easy to see how worked up he was getting. Emmett calling her midweek to suggest meeting up for dinner before joining everyone else at the club only confirmed her suspicions that Edward wasn't ok with it all. She'd agreed but she would have preferred the whole night be cancelled instead.<p>

"What are you so nervous about? You look great." Renee said wandering in as she passed by the open doorway and saw Bella pacing.

"It's not that, I'm just worried about Edward. I don't think this is a good idea." She said for once not even thinking about the outfit Rosalie had suggested she wear earlier in the day.

"I'm sure it'll be fine. If he didn't want to go he would have said so and there's a lot of you going so it's not like anything is going to happen that you can't handle. You sure this isn't just first date nerves?" She asked teasingly making Bella scowl at her.

"No, it's not really like that. I'm just worried something's going to go wrong, he's been so nervous all week."

"Well you freaking out isn't going to help him calm down. Just take a deep breath and enjoy yourself. It's about time he got a chance at having a good night out." Renee countered thinking Bella was over reacting.

"I guess you're right." Bella sighed, halting her pacing and trying to settle down.

"Good because they're here." Renee commented with a smile as she glanced past Bella's shoulder to see Emmett's car pull up outside and Edward climb out. "Wow he scrubs up well."

Bella was too flustered to hear Renee's last comment as she rushed to the door, pulling it open then freezing as she caught sight of Edward. He looked amazing. With the new clothes she was certain had come from Alice it was finally visible that he had gained a little weight over the past couple of weeks. The dark washed jeans while still low on his hips fit a lot better than his usual loose worn ones and the black button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows fitted him perfectly. Instead of looking frail and underweight he actually looked healthy to the extent that his usual sickly paleness now looked to almost glow healthily against the dark fabric of his shirt.

She didn't seem to be the only one taken by surprise though as she watched his eyes widen a little before he smiled, taking in the skinny jeans that looked to have been painted on and the deep purple corset style top that was only slightly obscured by the black fitted blazer, an outfit it had taken Rosalie almost an hour to talk her into wearing. Paired with the return of the smoky eye shadow, the large loose curls her hair had been set into and the scruffy converse that took a dressy outfit and just made it 'Bella' made Edward glad he had agreed to go and hadn't given in to his nerves. Bella was definitely worth it.

"You look stunning." He mumbled a little awkwardly as he reached her doorstep and stopped. He wasn't quite sure what to say and would have been quite happy to just stand and stare at her a while. It was hard to think clearly enough to put a full sentence together.

"You don't look too bad yourself." She answered with a shy smile that only unleashed one of his own and when she got lost in his sparkling eyes, realising there was only happiness there and none of the fear she'd been expecting she found she wanted to run her hands into his gloriously messy hair and pull his face down to her to get lost in his kiss.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked, pulling her out of her brief daydream and making her flush before she nodded and stepped out, pulling the door closed behind her. As soon as she was out of the house Edward reached for her hand, glancing shyly down at her before tugging her a little closer and softly kissing her cheek. "You really do look amazing."

He'd noticed the way her eyes had glazed over slightly as he'd stepped closer to her and had seen her gaze go to his hair before dropping back down to his lips and the blush had only confirmed where her thoughts had drifted to. He wanted the same thing she did, seeing her dressed up for him made it hard to resist the pull he felt towards her but if he was going to stick out the rest of the night he knew they couldn't go there yet. One terrifying thing at a time was enough and he didn't want to fail before they'd even reached the club. Maybe if the rest of the night went well he'd let himself try, considering just how appealing she looked he doubted he'd have much choice by the end of the night. He wouldn't be able to stop himself, with or without the threat of flashbacks. For now though he still had the sense to pull back so he settled for just holding her hand as he lead her to Emmett's car before he let go to open the door for her, following her into the back seat so Emmett could drive them to the restaurant.

When they got there Edward was quick to get out and open all the doors for Bella. He was pleasantly surprised by the restaurant Emmett had chosen as it was a little, homey looking place, not the big posh type he'd been expecting. He pulled Bella's chair out for her before sitting down beside her, letting Emmett claim the other side of the table. As he looked around at the families and couples scattered throughout the room Edward thought it would be a nice place to try and take Lucy too, especially as once they looked at the menus he saw the straight forward dishes listed.

Emmett loved the smile on Edward's face and felt pretty proud of his idea for bringing him there. The nervousness that had been clear in the flat seemed to have vanished as he looked around them and let his gaze come to rest on Bella. She'd taken the blazer she'd been wearing off and hung it over the back of her chair and it appeared Edward approved of what she was wearing as he didn't seem to be able to stop staring at her bare shoulders. When a waitress appeared and they ordered they soon fell into easy conversation, Bella telling them a little of what she was working on for college and Emmett asking several questions about Rosalie only for Bella to shake her head and refuse to answer making it perfectly clear that if he wanted to get to know Rosalie he was going to have to do it through the girl herself, Bella was not going to help. Edward remained quieter but that wasn't unusual as with his days consisting of sitting around watching day time TV he didn't often have much to contribute to daily conversations but he was happy just listening.

Bella felt herself relaxing while they ate as well. Her fears about Edward seemed unfounded when faced with the cheerful man sitting next to her. She'd been surprised by his gentlemanly ways but it made her feel special that he was treating her that way. She'd never had anyone open doors for her before and she certainly hadn't expected it from Edward with the knowledge of his lack of experience with girls yet it seemed to come naturally to him. Having seen his fascination with her off the shoulder t-shirt at the start of the week she was pleased to see the corset top was having the same effect. This time she was prepared for it though so instead of blushing and feeling embarrassed at his attention she smiled easily and was able to ignore it to some extent as she talked to Emmett yet enjoy the knowledge that Edward's eyes were on her. Half way through their dinner, when Emmett turned to questioning her on Rosalie it occurred to her that she probably should have invited Rosalie to join them. When the plans had been made she'd only been concerned with putting Edward at ease and it had felt like the fewer people there the better but now with how relaxed he seemed, if Rosalie had been there it would have been more like a double date and she'd have been freer to talk to Edward. As it was he seemed happy just listening but she found herself wanting to pull him out of his quietness.

As they waited for their deserts to be brought out Edward reached across and took hold of Bella's hand, rubbing his thumb lightly across the back of it.

"You ok?" She asked, his soft smile suggested so but he was still quiet.

"I'm good. We should come here again, bring Lucy too, I bet she'd love it." He answered already imaging a night with just the three of them there and loving the idea of it.

"I'm glad you like it, I thought it would be more your kind of place than some of the other restaurants around here." Emmett joined in making Bella wish once again that she'd thought to invite Rosalie along.

"It is, thanks for thinking of it." Edward replied a little awkwardly also wishing it was just him and Bella. He was grateful to Emmett for wanting to be there for him but he was actually now looking forward to getting to the club in the hope he could pull Bella away from the rest of them and get a few moments alone. The waiter interrupted them then, his hands full with ice cream sundaes which as Edward saw them just confirmed his thoughts that Lucy would love the place. He was just eager to get through them then though so they could move on.

Emmett had been late home from work so now they were almost done with their meal it was perfect timing for getting to Eclipse. He knew they'd have to be social for a little while but he was sure Bella would be willing to get lost on the dance floor once everyone had had a drink or two. It was surprising how much that thought no longer bothered him when it was combined with the idea of dancing with Bella. She really was some kind of miracle cure for his concerns.

Eclipse was within walking distance from the restaurant so once Emmett paid the bill they were there in minutes. It didn't take Emmett long to zero in on where Rosalie had claimed a table with the rest of their friends as he was taller than most and could see over the top of everyone's heads. They joined them at the booth, Rosalie introducing them to her friends Charlotte and Kate. Peter who was already there along with Jasper and Alice seemed to have taken an interest in Charlotte as they sat together and barely noticed the introductions going on around them. Alice however flung herself into Edward the instant she saw him, making him stumble back a step before he steadied them both, an arm around her shoulders as she hugged him while he refused to release his hold on Bella's hand.

"I'm so glad you came." Alice squealed into his ear causing him to pull back from her as she smiled sheepishly at him realising she'd been a bit too excited to see him.

"I'm glad I did too." He answered as although his nerves had returned a little once they'd actually stepped inside, the reassuring grip of Bella's hand in his own and Emmett's imposing presence were managing to keep him grounded and as they all slid into the large booth it felt good to be part of a group for once. They stayed together for the first couple of rounds, everyone else drinking but Bella and Emmett remained firm in their choice to stay off the alcohol along with Edward and while the rest of them who had clearly been drinking before they'd arrived got gradually more boisterous the table was full of lively chatter and laughter.

Edward contented himself with keeping Bella by his side, letting the conversation go on around them and keeping a close watch on both his and Bella's drinks. It didn't take long before they started to separate off, Alice being the first to head to the dance floor dragging a slightly reluctant Jasper along behind her only to be followed shortly after by Charlotte and Peter. Emmett was attempting to talk to Rosalie but she was more interested in what Kate had to say yet the sparkle in her eyes as she occasionally glanced to Emmett showed Bella that she knew exactly what she was doing and when she announced that her and Kate were going to dance a persistent Emmett tagged along, his eyes clearly glued to Rosalie's hips as she put a little extra sway into her walk, showing off the way her figure hugging black dress clung to her curves and the way the short hemline along with the high stiletto heels enhanced her long legs.

"Having fun?" Bella asked once they were alone, once again concerned for how he was doing. She'd noticed the way he couldn't quite settle, the suspicious looks he gave anyone who came too close to their table and how he watched their glasses.

"It's better than I thought it would be." He answered truthfully. The music was loud and he was a little jumpy but he wasn't panicking and being with Bella made it bearable. The company wasn't even too bad either, even if Alice had attempted to talk his ear off about how she'd just known the clothes she'd picked out would look good on him. It was altogether a lot more fun than he'd been expecting.

"Remember we can go at any time if you want to. It might even do Emmett a favour as I don't think Rosalie is going to give into him tonight so he's just going to make a fool of himself." Bella commented nodding towards where they could see their friends on the dance floor. Rosalie and Kate were dancing together provocatively while Emmett hovered nearby, watching every move Rosalie made.

"That's all the more reason to stay." Edward laughed as they watched Emmett's eyes go wide as Rosalie pulled Kate in closer, whispering something into her ear before they both laughed and Rosalie kept hold of Kate's hips as they moved against each other.

"How long before he snaps do you think?" Bella asked thinking he looked about one minute away from hauling Rosalie away from Kate and into his own arms.

"Not long, do you think she'll slap him?" Edward asked, the amusement dancing in his eyes.

"I'm not sure, maybe but she does want him so maybe she'll take pity on him." Bella answered.

"I hope she slaps him." Edward commented with a smirk making Bella laugh.

"Of course you do. Do you want another drink?" She asked noticing that his glass was empty and her one was nearly finished.

"Not particularly." He muttered, still not trusting the drinks and far more interested in keeping Bella beside him. "Would you like to dance?"

"Sure though I should probably warn you I'm not very good at it." She answered all too happy to take his hand as he stood and helped her out of the booth. When they got to the dance floor Bella started to head to where they're friends were still dancing only for Edward to tug her hand and lead her in the opposite direction not wanting to have to share her again.

Finding the slightly emptier far corner of the dance floor Edward stopped and pulled Bella into his arms, letting his hands rest on her hips as she threaded hers around his neck.

"I've been wanting to do this all day." He murmured, letting his head drop so he could nuzzle into her hair slightly and she could hear what he said.

"Me too and I don't usually like to dance." She responded quickly becoming addicted to feeling him against her. It was somehow more intimate than their usual hugs even though they were dancing nowhere near as close to each other as some of the couples nearby.

"Me neither." He commented pulling her in a couple of inches closer so they were crushed together and he could feel every sway of her hips as they moved together to the beat of the song that was playing. He'd never felt anything like the current of excitement that ran though him and when she didn't make a move to pull away and instead just buried her hands into his hair he let his wander, taking in the curve of her waist, cinched in and enhanced by the smooth, stiff fabric of her top. Loving the feel of it beneath his hands he ran them up and down from her ribs to her hips before letting them slip round to rest at the small of her back only forcing her even closer. She gasped at the feel of him pressed against her so solidly and his unexpected boldness and tugged at his hair to make him move his head away from her neck so she could see him better. When she saw no sign of fear or apprehension in his contented smile she relaxed back into his grip and enjoyed the sway of the music, no longer caring whether they were even moving in time to the music or not anymore. It felt too good.

Edward was only vaguely aware of the room around them and the fact he should have been backing away long before that moment. The pull he felt towards Bella had been growing stronger every moment he spent with her and now as she melted against him it was too powerful to deny. He wanted to be closer and as that was physically impossible at that moment his gaze was tempted to her lightly glossed lips.

He'd got past the dark, loud, alcohol ridden club. He'd conquered the fear of getting close to Bella and she'd destroyed his walls, breaking through them one at a time, earning his trust, his friendship and something else he hadn't even known he could give. She meant more to him than anyone other than Lucy. Her presence was enough to calm him, to ground him, to cheer him. If she could push away everything else and make it pale to insignificance by being close then surely he could push himself just that little bit further and give them both what they wanted so much.

"I want to try something." He murmured into her ear so she could hear him over the music and she pulled back just a little to stare up at him once more. Her curious gaze turned to one of longing and anticipation as he lifted a hand from her back to brush her hair back from her face before letting it settle against her cheek. She titled her head into his touch as he slowly lowered his own, closing the gap between them inch by inch until there was barely a breaths width between them and he let his other arm raise to cup her face between his hands while her fingers threaded back through his hair, holding him in place but not forcing him closer. He took a moment then to stare into her eyes, seeing the trust and care radiating from the soft brown orbs. She wouldn't mind if he couldn't close that last distance, he could see it there, she'd take whatever he could give and would never ask for more. She understood him, would never judge him and would wait patiently until he was ready. He wanted to be ready.

Closing the final distance between them Edward let his lips meet her soft ones and as he did, instead of the room fading into another it disappeared completely. There was nothing except Bella as he held her to him and her fingers tugged at his hair. The gentle pressure of her lips against his was so much more than he could ever have imagined and he didn't want it to ever end. There was the faint taste of strawberries from the light lip gloss she'd been wearing but it only enhanced what was naturally Bella, not masking or taking away from her natural sweetness. When he showed no sign of pulling away Bella took the lead, opening her mouth to him and encouraging him to meet her as she moaned quietly.

He tentatively deepened the kiss before groaning at how good it felt and letting his hands drop from her face, making sure to brush the bare shoulders that had captivated him all night before falling back to her hips, crushing her against him where she could feel exactly what the kiss was doing to him. Forgetting all his hesitance and worries Edward gave himself over to his instincts, loving the small sounds he could coax from Bella and the way her hands gripped his hair. It was only when it all started to feel a little too good that he realised he was slowly rocking his hips against hers and there was a desperate need for air that he pulled back.

Bella whimpered slightly as he lifted his head and took a tiny step back so they were no longer crushed against each other but he slid his arms around her as her head fell to his chest. They were both breathing heavily and he was still lost in the feelings that were coursing through him. He'd never felt any like it before. He felt energized, happy, free, like he could do anything at that moment but all he wanted to do was kiss her again.

When Bella managed to catch her breath she lifted her head away from Edward's chest so she could look at him to find him staring at her in wonder and wouldn't have been surprised if the same look was on her face. She'd been kissed before, but never like that. He may not have known what he was doing but it was perfect and it ignited a lust in her she'd never felt before. She'd wanted to drown in it and never surface. When he'd deepened the kiss and pulled her against him she'd been too lost in the feelings to care that they were in a busy club, surrounded by people and had just wanted to be even closer. Now he'd put a little space between them and she could think a bit more clearly she was glad he'd pulled them away from their friends. She'd hate to think what Rosalie would have said had she seen them. She would have never have heard the end of it. As it was, all she was faced with was a very happy Edward.

"No flashbacks?" She asked.

"Nope, not at all." He answered, smirking at the way that made her smile.

"So we can do it again?" She asked hopefully and in response Edward pulled her into another kiss although it was much shorter as he was already too riled up from their first attempt.

"Definitely." He murmured as they both tried to catch their breath again. After that they danced for a little longer, their movements interrupted frequently as one or the other searched out another kiss. Edward didn't want the night to end.

As the music changed and they surfaced from yet another breath stealing kiss Edward glanced over Bella's shoulder to see if he could see the rest of their friends, thinking that they could probably do with getting another drink and sitting down for a while as his health still wasn't a hundred percent and he was starting to tire. He spotted Rosalie's blonde hair first, finding they'd all moved back to the booth they'd started the night in so he looked back to Bella, about to suggest they join them when a flash of red curly hair caught his attention. Taking a second glance he found the red head straight away and Bella could feel something was wrong as his grip on her tightened and the smile was wiped from his face.

"What's wrong?" She asked, trying to pull his gaze back to her so she could see his face better but he was distracted, still staring at something over her shoulder.

"We have to go." He said, still not looking away from whatever had caught his attention but dropping his hold on her only to grab her hand and start tugging her away from their secluded spot on the dance floor.

"Why? What's wrong Edward?" Bella asked, stumbling a little as he walked quickly through the room. He didn't answer or slow down and frustrated at the sudden change in his mood Bella followed his previous line of sight and after a moment spotted the same curly red hair that had first drawn his attention. Vicky was standing against the wall, a drink in one hand and smiling as she watched them. Noticing she'd been spotted by Bella she lifted her free hand to wave before turning to the blonde man beside her and whispering something in his ear. When he looked over at them too Bella felt a chill run through her, there was something in his eyes, even from a distance that let Bella know he was trouble. Pulling her gaze away she refocused on Edward who was still tugging her forward.

"It's them isn't it?" She asked and watched the way his shoulders tightened before he nodded sharply. Bella didn't ask any more questions then as she knew they needed to find Emmett and leave quickly.

"We need to leave." Edward announced as soon as they reached their previous table where Bella was relieved to see all their friends had gathered. They looked up at Edward with confused shock at his sudden announcement as they'd all been having a good night but still being sober Emmett could see straight away that something was very wrong.

"You ok?" He asked not liking the hard expression on Edward's face or the frightened concern on Bella's as she glanced over her shoulder.

"We need to go, now." Edward repeated steadfastly staring at Emmett and willing him to just agree. They had to get out of there and they were too close to risk telling Emmett why.

"Why?" Emmett asked, standing and moving out of the booth, curious as to what Bella was staring at. It wasn't until he was stood beside them that he could see the couple at the other side of the room who were watching them all. Remembering Bella's description of the redhead and seeing the man beside her he knew who they were.

"That's them isn't it? The ones who hurt you?" He asked, his voice a low growl and as he realised just who exactly they were he was furious.

"We have to go." Edward repeated yet again, suddenly terrified that Emmett would do something he'd end up regretting as now Emmett had spotted them he was sure this wouldn't end well. Emmett wouldn't be able to let it go.

"No we don't." Emmett stated. "Is that them?"

Edward reluctantly nodded.

"You're telling me James Hadrian is the guy that hurt you?"

"You know him?" Edward asked, shocked at that revelation and still not remembering him even with the new knowledge of his surname.

"Of course I bloody know him! This ends tonight. Can't believe that waste of space thought he could ever get away with it. He always was an idiot." He muttered angrily before striding through the club with only one thought in place.

"Emmett no! You can't do anything!" Edward shouted after him alerting the rest of their table to the fact that something was actually wrong. Rosalie was the first to her feet shortly followed by Peter and Jasper who told the rest of the girls to stay where they were. Edward was already chasing after Emmett who was ignoring his pleas and as he still had hold of Bella's hand she was with him so Rosalie refused to listen to Peter and Jasper and followed them.

Emmett came to a stop in the middle of the dance floor as James had moved to meet him as soon as he'd seen him coming. They stood staring at each other, Emmett's eyes narrowed in fury and James smiling calmly, his ice blue eyes calculating.

"I wondered when I'd be seeing you Emmett. Finally grew a backbone and gone against Daddy?" James sneered making Emmett seethe and take another step closer, totally blind to his brother's panic.

"Emmett you can't do this, please let's just go." Edward pleaded as Jasper, Peter and Rosalie joined them. While Jasper and Peter moved up towards Emmett Rosalie stayed back, trying to pull Bella away as it was obvious that whatever was about to happen would not be good but Bella refused to leave Edward's side. He was pulling at Emmett's arm, trying to get him away from James and still pleading for him to stop but Emmett was too large and too focused on James for it to make any difference.

"This vendetta you've got against my brother ends now." He hissed making James smile wider.

"Oh I don't know about that." He commented lightly, "We had so many more plans, it would be a shame to let them go to waste."

"It ends now!" Emmett snarled and not even noticing Jasper and Peter now trying to help Edward pull him back, or Edward's continual pleas for him to stop he took one more step forward as he pulled his arm back before swinging it forward, meeting James' face with a sickening crunch and enough force to make him stumble backwards before falling to the floor. He sat there looking up at them, blood trickling from his broken nose as he lifted a hand up to try and stem it.

"I don't want to ever see you near Edward again. That was just a warning." Emmett muttered before he finally let Jasper and Peter push him back. Edward was frozen, staring at James as he smiled serenely from his spot on the floor. It was then it crashed down just where they were, in the middle of the dance floor surrounded by stunned bystanders. Realising that Bella was tugging on his arm, trying to pull him away he turned and let her lead him out of the club, feeling an odd sense of detachment. When they got outside to find a still agitated Emmett pacing up and down with Jasper and Peter trying to talk him down Edward felt the anger slowly trickle in to replace his detachment as he shook free of Bella's grip and walked up to his brother, coming to a stop right in front of him. The look of anger on his face was enough to stop Emmett's pacing as he looked down at him confused.

"You have no idea what you've just done. I want you out of my flat and I don't want to see you again." Edward spat before pushing past him to walk away, determined to get home by himself. He'd only made it a couple of steps before he heard James' distorted voice call after him. He stopped and turned back to the club, seeing him stood in the doorway, blood still on his face and his nose now starting to swell as Vicky stood beside him helping him stay upright.

"Remember that deal we had? You just broke it. Little Lucy's fair game now. Enjoy the rest of your night."


	33. Chapter 31 Fall Out

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 31- Fall Out<strong>

James' words echoed around them and although Emmett wanted nothing more than to show James exactly what he thought of his threat with his fists he held himself back since Edward was already oddly furious with him for the first attack. There was nothing he could do about the angry glare though as James flicked his gaze between him and Edward with a satisfied smirk. He didn't seem at all bothered by his rapidly swelling nose which just infuriated Emmett further as James surveyed the rest of their group. Emmett followed his gaze to see Kate and Charlotte huddled together near the club's door looking scared and confused, Rose, Alice and Bella just in front of them looking worried, and in Rose's case just a little angry and then Peter and Jasper who stood together, between James and the girls, Peter eying James warily while Jasper's attention was firmly on Edward. Apparently satisfied that he'd sufficiently ruined their evening he looked back to Victoria and whispered something in her ear that made her giggle, a high pitched girlish sound that Emmett remembered and found just as grating as he had six years ago. Luckily before they managed to do anything else and break the short tether Emmett had on his self control Victoria helped James climb into one of the taxi's stood waiting outside the club's doors, pausing only to glance back at Bella, a devious smile on her face as she waved goodbye.

"Peter can you grab a taxi with the girls and make sure they get home safe?" Jasper asked after the taxi had pulled away in an attempt to organise the chaos he was sure was about to ensue. With the distractions now gone, Emmett had looked back to Edward and frozen under his furious glare. Even from a distance Jasper could see Edward's hands were in clenched fists at his sides and there was a fine tremble running through him giving away the extent of his anger.

"I'm staying with you." Alice spoke up, moving to take hold of his hand and he glanced down to her before looking back to the brothers. There was no way he was sending them home alone.

"I'm going with Emmett and Edward to make sure they get home ok, Peter will take you home." He told her, staying firm in his decision. Edward was going to be volatile at best, and forcing him to go home with Emmett was only going to set him off but there was no other solution. Emmett couldn't go back to his parents' house or his cover would be blown and it was clear Edward and Lucy were not safe. Both of them were quick to anger and stubborn to go with it, they were going to need a calm head to counter that and stop them from coming to blows. Neither of them would come out of it well if it got that far and they'd both end up regretting it. He definitely didn't want Alice in the middle of it all.

"No, I'm coming with you. Edward's my brother; I have every right to know what's going on." Alice demanded and the steely glint in her eyes let Jasper know he was defeated. There was just no point fighting her when she really had her mind set on something. That was a lesson he'd learnt very early on in their relationship.

"I'm coming too, I'm not leaving Edward." Bella stepped forward and Jasper sighed.

"Fine, Peter get a taxi, take everyone else with you and go. We're going in Emmett's car."

"Sure you'll be ok with them?" Peter asked, eying the brothers who seemed unaware of what was going on around them while they waited for one of them to break their silence. Jasper nodded in response so Peter just clapped him on the shoulder, wishing him luck as he led the girls a little further down the pavement to where another taxi was parked. He leant down to talk to the driver briefly before pulling the back door open and holding it for the girls. There were no complaints by either Kate or Charlotte who seemed a little taken aback by what had happened but Rosalie hesitated, her eyes settling on where Emmett stood before she finally got in. Once Peter had joined them and closed the door the taxi pulled away leaving the rest of them standing there alone and that seemed to be all Edward had been waiting for. As soon as the taxi was out of sight he stalked towards Emmett again, his anger growing with each step as the tension between them rose.

"Do you see what you've done now? Why couldn't you just leave it alone like I asked?" He snarled and it was a side to Edward Bella had never seen before. He was past anger and well into rage but she understood why. James' words had been a clear threat to Lucy and every protective response in Edward had been triggered. It was terrifying, yet oddly beautiful and after a moment's hesitation she stepped towards him ignoring the way Jasper reached for her wrist to stop her. She wanted Edward to know she was there for him while showing that he had her support. She stayed just slightly behind him, guessing it was best to stay out of the way but she reached for his hand and he let her take it. He let out a calming breath as he felt her hand in his and his other hand relaxed from its fist.

"He needed to be stopped." Emmett answered although the fire had gone from his voice now to be replaced by uncertainty as that final threat circled through his mind again. "What was the deal you made with James and what did he mean by Lucy's fair game now?"

"He told me if I kept quiet about what was going on Lucy was safe, they wouldn't touch her." Edward hissed his free hand clenching into a fist once more as the urge to punch Emmett resurfaced. Noticing that small movement and seeing where the argument was heading Jasper moved closer to them so they would both be within arm's reach and was disgruntled when Alice followed him rather than staying at a safe distance.

"That's why you wouldn't tell any of us what was happening? You were protecting Lucy?" Emmett asked for clarification only infuriating Edward further.

"Of course I was! I don't like being beaten up and I'm not stupid so how could it never occur to you that the only reason I'd ever let him do what he has and keep quiet about it had to be for her?" Edward continued to question angrily, the grip of Bella's hand in his the only thing keeping him vaguely sane at that moment. Emmett had gone way too far this time. He tried to step closer again only for Jasper to suddenly be in between them, blocking his path.

"Now isn't the time for this. We should be getting home." He stated, keeping his voice calm and level even if the glare Edward was shooting him was intimidating. The calmness however seemed to have the opposite effect of what Jasper had been hoping for though as it made him visibly bristle, causing Bella to wrap her arm around his, the extra contact pulling him back from the edge as it managed to ground him.

"Jasper's right and there's nothing to argue over anyway. James' threat was empty, he won't get near her. We won't give him a chance and you could go to the police now since there's no point staying quiet anymore." Emmett suggested only for Edward to laugh coldly.

"If you believe that you're more stupid than you look. He won't give up, not now and what exactly would I tell the police? It would be my word against his, no one else saw what happened and there's no evidence to say it was him who attacked me. They wouldn't be able to do anything." He muttered, a little of his anger turning into despair as the truth of his words rang through him.

"They could still investigate it...that in its self might make James back down." Alice countered quietly.

"He wouldn't back down, he'd just tell them what Emmett did to his nose and there are plenty of witnesses to that. All involving the police will do is make James more determined and get Emmett arrested for assault. As much as I would love to see that happen right now I doubt any of you would." Edward stated, the idea being briefly appealing for teaching Emmett a lesson but sense soon caught up with him and he knew it would just irritate James.

"He can try, Dad would get me out of it." Emmett responded only making Edward glare at him again.

"If you think that you really are deluded! Dad finds out what happened tonight and why and he'd kick you out, not come to your rescue." He scoffed and while Emmett finally started to look a little worried Edward's own words brought Lucy back to the forefront of his mind and he suddenly realised that while they were standing around arguing in the street James could have notified his friends about what had happened in the club. Jasper was right, now was most definitely not the time to stand around arguing no matter how angry Emmett was making him.

"We need to go home now." He announced, turning to Bella as the fear of what could be happening in that moment really hit him. He had to get to Lucy.

"Lucy will be ok Edward, Esme and Carlisle are there and James is on his way to the hospital I should imagine. It looked like Emmett broke his nose." She tried to sooth him automatically understanding where his fear was coming from but he just shook his head before starting to walk in the direction Emmett had parked the car, taking her with him this time as he hadn't let go of her hand.

"It's not just James." He muttered, and Emmett who had started to follow along with Jasper and Alice heard what he said.

"What do you mean?" He questioned with a sinking feeling in his gut.

"There's another two of them, I didn't see them in the club. They could be anywhere." Edward answered tersely.

"Who are they?" Jasper asked only to be fixed with a cold glare and Edward increasing the speed of his footsteps. Anywhere included his flat, they needed to get home, not stand around asking and answering questions.

"I don't know, I still don't know who James is either even if Emmett seems to." He muttered angrily before realising he didn't have a clue how Emmett would know him and that bothered him. "How _do_ you know him anyway?"

"He was in my year at school." Emmett answered before sighing, "Let's just get home and then we can all sit down and talk. Work out what's going on and what to do about it."

"If you think you're staying once we get home you are sadly mistaken. I wasn't joking when I said I wanted you out. Did you recognize him Jasper?" Edward asked still furious with Emmett and intending on chucking him out as soon as they got home. He'd accept the ride in his car as it would get them home faster and he needed to get to Lucy but other than that he no longer wanted anything to do with Emmett. He'd put Lucy in danger and Edward just couldn't tolerate that.

"He looked a little familiar but I wouldn't have been able to put a name to him or say where I've seen him before." Jasper answered sensing it would be unwise to comment on Edward's plans to throw Emmett out just then. He was fully aware that the brothers' fight was far from over but at least they were headed in the right direction for now so it would be better to just let Edward believe he was getting his way. It would be much easier to derail his plans once they were back at the flat with Esme and Carlisle there for backup. As soon as they found out Emmett knew the man who had hurt Edward they would want him there to answer questions with the hope of figuring out what was going on. That meant all he had to do for the time being was keep things calm enough to get them all in the car together which Edward's desire to get back to Lucy seemed to ensure would be happening anyway.

"I didn't recognize him at all." Alice added looking between her two brothers with a frown. She'd never seen Edward as angry as he was before and considering it involved Lucy's safety she couldn't see how they'd manage to get him calmed down enough to forgive Emmett. Somehow they would need to find a way to make him see just how much he needed him around.

"You wouldn't, he was in my year and he didn't exactly socialise with the popular crowd." Emmett explained seemingly ignoring Edward's comment and focusing more on Jasper and Alice as they walked together, "Half the time he didn't even show at school."

Edward didn't comment to that but he was trying to remember James. If they'd gone to school together, even if he was in Emmett's year then he should have recognized him, especially as he must have interacted with him at some point to have given James the idea he needed revenge. He had thought James seemed familiar the first time he'd seen him which gave him the unsettling feeling that there probably was something about him in his memories and if so it wouldn't be pleasant. After all, they already knew just how effective he was at blocking the things he really didn't want to remember.

Reaching the car Emmett unlocked it and they all got in, Jasper taking the passenger seat while the rest of them climbed into the back. Bella tried to calm Edward down a little by keeping hold of his hand and resting her head against his shoulder and though he seemed to welcome the contact she could still feel him shaking.

"Esme would have called one of us if anything was wrong, Lucy will be fine." She said quietly to which Edward sighed and let his head drop to rest against hers.

"I need to see her." He muttered, nothing else would stop the worry. Bella was probably right but there was always the chance they'd done something to Carlisle and Esme as well to stop them from being able to contact anyone. It wasn't really likely that they'd be there but even the smallest of chances was too high. The stakes to the game had been upped and that wasn't going to mean anything good for them. So much for their evening out being the start of better times.

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><p>Esme and Carlisle were curled up on the sofa together when they heard the front door slam open and were startled as Edward barely glanced into the room before running in the direction of Lucy's room, Bella following close behind him. They got up to find out what was going on but didn't have chance to follow Edward themselves before Alice and Jasper appeared, shortly followed by a miserable Emmett who made sure to lock the door behind them all.<p>

"What's going on?" Carlisle asked, noticing that Alice and Jasper both looked worried. That, along with the way Edward had shot off straight to Lucy's room did not bode well.

"Everything's been ok here?" Emmett asked, avoiding Carlisle's question and cutting off Alice who had been about to answer. She scowled at him which went unnoticed by Emmett but not by Esme.

"Yes, Lucy's been fine, she even went to bed easily." She answered before repeating Carlisle's question and directing it to Alice. "What's going on?"

"Emmett's leaving." Edward answered angrily, halting Alice's second attempt at answering as he stormed into the room, heading straight for the corner where Emmett's bags sat. He picked the first one up and was going for the second one when Jasper stepped in and took it from him.

"Do you really think that's wise?" He asked quietly while bracing himself for Edward's anger. Apparently finding Lucy safe and well had not been enough to calm him down.

"I don't want him here. He's put Lucy in danger." Edward snapped, reaching for the bag again only for Jasper to hold it behind himself and out of his reach.

"I know but that's why you need him here. You're not safe on your own." Jasper explained patiently making Edward glare at him before he growled and dropped the bag he had hold of.

"Fine, but I'm not talking to him." He muttered before claiming his usual spot on the sofa and beckoning Bella over from the doorway to sit next to him. If they were expecting him to tolerate having Emmett there he was going to need Bella to help him keep control of his anger.

"Would somebody _please _explain to us what is going on?" Carlisle demanded since Edward seemed to have settled down a little and both he and Esme were still mystified as to what was going on. As far as he'd been aware up until then Edward and Emmett had been managing to get along and sort out their differences. For Edward to be suddenly demanding he leave, and for endangering Lucy then something serious had to have happened.

"James was at the club, Emmett broke his nose, now he's after Lucy." Edward grumbled and if Emmett hadn't already retreated in search of extra chairs he would have been glaring at him. He wanted to hit out at him just to release some of the anger that was consuming him and he really wasn't used to feeling like that which only made it worse.

"Who's James?" Esme asked as she returned to the sofa, taking up the final seat beside Bella while Jasper took the chair, pulling Alice down onto his lap. With everyone sitting down he thought it safe to assume they wouldn't need to hold either Edward or Emmett back for the time being.

"Bruise creator and shoulder dislocater." Edward responded shortly as he was still having trouble containing his anger. Seeing Lucy sound asleep had only pushed back his worries, effectively allowing the anger to flood back in and now as they talked about it the urge to hurt Emmett was only growing.

"And Emmett broke his nose?" Carlisle checked, looking at Emmett as he accepted the kitchen chair from him and noticing the fresh bruising on his only just healed hand.

"Yes, in an unprovoked attack in the middle of the crowded dance floor." Edward answered. Esme and Carlisle both regarded Emmett for a moment, they could understand why he'd want to hurt James but acting on it with witnesses around did seem a little rash. Especially considering how Edward was reacting.

"Giving him the impression that you told Emmett what's been going on and bringing on the threat against Lucy?" Carlisle asked remembering what Edward had told them before about not being able to say anything for Lucy's sake and putting the two things together. When Edward nodded, the reminder of just what it meant for Lucy took away some of his anger again as he sank his head into his hands and tugged at his hair. He didn't have a clue how he was going to keep Lucy safe when he couldn't even keep himself out of danger. It would also seriously restrict him as he had been planning on returning to walking Lucy to and from school since he was feeling better but that just wouldn't be possible now. They'd be an easy target if they tried it and he couldn't put Lucy at risk like that so they were going to have to remain dependant on other people which he hated. He could feel Bella lightly rubbing his back to try and offer some form of comfort but this time it wasn't something he could just ignore while pretending that everything was ok. Everything was definitely not ok and it was all Emmett's fault.

"How was I meant to know what it would mean? You didn't tell me anything about it! I saw the guy who's been hurting you and you expected me to just walk away and let him go?" Emmett suddenly snapped. He'd been staying quiet trying not to anger Edward any further but he was angry himself now as he had had no idea what confronting James would mean. He'd just seen the man who had hurt his little brother so badly and wanted to teach him a lesson so he wouldn't do it again. It didn't help that he already knew James from school where he'd always had a very low opinion of him anyway. They couldn't have expected him to just magically know about the previous threats and if Edward had told Carlisle enough that he could automatically figure out where the new threat had come from then they should have shared it with him as well.

"I expected you to listen to me but you never do! I told you I wanted to leave, I asked you to let it go but no, you couldn't just listen. Even without me pleading you not to, how could it ever have seemed like a good idea to punch him in the middle of a crowded room? You said James was stupid, but even he has enough sense to hurt me when there are no witnesses." Edward responded, his voice rising with his anger. The only thing keeping him from yelling was the fact his daughter was fast asleep just down the hall and he didn't want to wake her. She had to believe their night had been ok, and seeing them yelling at each other would not accomplish that.

"I wasn't thinking alright? I hate what he's done to you and how there was nothing I could do to make it better and then there he was and there was something I could finally do. I wanted him to hurt and I wanted him to know that you're not on your own anymore and I'm not just going to stand by and let him hurt you. I'm sorry for what it's caused ok but I don't regret it, he deserves so much more." Emmett responded heatedly and Bella actually had to grab hold of Edward's arm to stop him lurching from his seat as he tried to get to Emmett.

"If your idea of doing something is putting Lucy in danger just so you can feel a little better about yourself then I _really_ don't want you here." He seethed.

"Fighting Emmett isn't going to help Lucy." Jasper interrupted their argument as everyone else seemed too stunned by Edward's anger to say anything, "And since he's the only one of us who even remembers James I'd say you need him here."

"You know the man behind all of this Emmett?" Esme questioned, instantly catching what Jasper was saying and hoping to help him derail the escalating argument. If Emmett really did know James, maybe with a little more information on him they might be able to work out what was actually going on between him and Edward.

"Yeah, he was in my year at school. I know the woman he was with tonight as well. She's Victoria Smith, I actually went out with her for a week or two in school until she caught me with another girl at a party." Emmett responded a little sheepishly realising as he said it that it didn't sound very good. If Victoria was James' girlfriend, then that fact he'd cheated on her really couldn't be helping Edward's case much but there was nothing he could do about it now so he just continued, "She was a little on the wild side back then, probably still is considering she'd have to be crazy to be with James."

"And you still don't remember them Edward?" Carlisle asked looking between the brothers as Edward shook his head but kept quiet.

"I don't remember him either, or Victoria." Jasper commented as Alice mumbled her agreement.

"As far as I saw he never really mixed with anyone other than a small group of friends and the younger kids he tormented, and that was if he even bothered to turn up at school. He was a lowlife, nasty piece of work then too, into drugs, drink, fighting, anything like that. I always thought he had a screw loose to be honest. I don't know if any of you ever actually met Victoria, she was from a different school, I met her at an out of school careers day and we really didn't last that long."

"Then this doesn't make sense." Carlisle thought out loud, "If they had nothing to do with Edward in school, what do they want from him now? You're sure you haven't run into them between the time you left school and now?"

"No, the first time I saw them was when James was throwing punches. I've had nothing to do with anyone from school since Dad chucked me out." Edward responded.

"So it has to be something from when you were in school or it's a case of mistaken identity and he's going after the wrong man." Carlisle deduced only for Edward to shake his head before tugging at his hair in frustration again.

"He knows too much about me for it to be a mistake and he must have gone to some effort just to find me. It took Emmett years to track me down and in the end he only found me by mistake."

"What does he look like?" Esme asked quietly, Edward's comment making her think back to the young man who'd turned up on their doorstep asking for Edward and first alerting them to the fact something was seriously wrong in the family.

"About my height, blue eyes, dirty blonde hair that's always tied back in a ponytail and he's usually in jeans and a leather jacket." Edward answered, lifting his head to look at Esme as he wondered why she wanted to know.

"He's kind of sleazy looking too, there's something in his eyes that says trouble." Bella added remembering how uneasy he'd made her feel in the club. Edward glanced to her worriedly when she said that and wished she'd never had to be anywhere near the man. She could see the unspoken apology in his eyes but she countered it with a small smile to let him know there was nothing to apologize for.

"He sounds like the man who came to the house asking for you." Esme said, glancing to Carlisle to see what he made of it and she knew he was thinking the same as her when she could see he was troubled by his furrowed brow.

"If that was him then it probably means you're right Edward. To track us down would have been a lot of work and time, not something someone would do lightly." He commented.

"They haven't said anything to you that might make sense now you know who they are?" Jasper asked thinking there had to be a clue somewhere as to what was going on.

"All he's said to me is that he wants revenge and I'm meant to be suffering. I honestly have no idea what it is I've done to him." Edward answered trying to think if he'd forgotten something but he was sure James had never told him why he wanted revenge. He had suffered several blows to the head though so maybe he had and he'd just missed it but either way it wasn't going to help them now.

"What about someone else from school? Maybe he's acting for them and it has nothing to do with him." Alice suggested even though it seemed unlikely as she couldn't remember Edward ever being in trouble with anyone.

"Would he do that? Just go after someone with no personal reason?" Esme asked, unable to comprehend someone being so cold hearted.

"Probably, if they paid him or he just thought it was good fun. He was a bully in school and he didn't seem to have many limits." Emmett answered with a shrug. He really wouldn't put anything past James.

"Have you upset anyone else Edward?" Carlisle asked doubtfully and wasn't surprised when Edward shook his head.

"No, I didn't really have much to do with anyone in school and even less so after. I've always kept to myself."

"Well if you don't remember anything, maybe something else happened at that party when your drink was spiked. There's still parts of that night you don't remember isn't there?" Esme suggested returning Edward to what he'd been thinking on their way back to the car. It was possibly but he really didn't want to go there.

"I guess but that doesn't really help us." He muttered reluctantly. The evening had already turned bad enough without heading back into the memories of that night.

"Actually, that would make some sense. It was James' party. Hell I wouldn't be surprised if he was the one who spiked the drink in the first place! It's the kind of thing he'd find amusing and I know he did drugs in school." Emmett threw in to the conversation wondering why he hadn't thought of it before. It was probably good that it hadn't occurred to him before though as if it had, he wouldn't have been able to let James go with just a broken nose and he would have undoubtedly ended the night in a prison cell.

"What do you mean it was his party? I thought it was the Stanelys' house." Edward questioned, his head shooting up to stare at Emmett. There was no way he'd got that wrong, it was definitely the Stanleys' house they'd been in, it was one of the few things he had remembered about that night right from the beginning.

"It was, James is their older half brother. They've got different dads and he kept his dad's surname but they all lived together." Emmett answered wondering why that answer made Edward look so sick.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore." Edward stated sharply avoiding everyone's eyes once more so Bella returned to rubbing his back, getting the impression from his response and the uneven pattern his breathing had taken on that he was close to panicking. Carlisle and Esme were both watching him curiously and they could almost see his walls coming back up as he shut down making it clear there was something there.

"Edward, if you remember anything, no matter how small, that might help us figure out why James wants revenge we need to know." Carlisle stated calmly hoping to coax him into sharing whatever had just come to mind. His tendency to bottle things up really wouldn't help them now.

"I really, _really_ do not want to talk about this anymore." He repeated and it was clear that any residual anger had converted itself into anxiety. When he finally looked up at Carlisle he was surprised to see fear in his eyes as he pleaded with him to just drop it.

"There is something isn't there? You know whatever it is we're all behind you and we won't think any less of you but it will help us keep Lucy safe if you tell us." Esme said gently and Bella felt him start to tremble again as he shook his head defiantly. He couldn't talk about it, he'd been trying so hard to pretend none of it had happened.

"Hey, look at me." Bella said quietly while leaning over so she could see his face and gently lifting his chin up to make him look at her as she sensed his panic escalating. "We only want to help you. You're safe here."

Leaning forward she lightly kissed him to further reassure him and when she pulled back he sighed before relaxing into the sofa and closing his eyes, taking hold of her hand as he did so. It was just as hard to say no to her as it was to Lucy. As much as he didn't want to say the words and make it all real he knew he was going to have to.

"Is he really Jessica and Riley Stanley's older brother?" He asked, almost choking on the names as he struggled to get the words out and hoping that Emmett would change his mind so he wouldn't have to explain. He preferred to pretend they never existed and now, having to think about them he just wanted to curl up, hide and pretend none of it ever happened if it would just stop the memories flooding in.

"Half brother, yeah." Emmett responded shattering Edward's hope that he wouldn't have to talk about it any further as it confirmed that they probably had a large role to play in what was going on in his life. It was the only connection he knew of between him and James and it was too much of a coincidence for it not to be related.

"Then he's Lucy's Uncle." He uttered quietly while trying to suppress the urge to throw up.

"What? _Please _tell me you're joking." Emmett responded before anyone else could say anything.

"Jessica Stanley is her mother. Her birth certificate is in the drawers by the TV if you want to check it." Edward mumbled in response, trying to pull away from Bella's hand as it didn't feel right to be holding on to her while talking about Jessica only for Bella to tighten her grip. He may have felt ashamed but it didn't make a difference to her and one way or another she was going to make sure he knew that. She wanted to be there for him and it was clear he needed the support. He was still shaking and looking slightly green.

"She was even more insane than her brother!" Emmett exclaimed thoughtlessly which successfully brought Edward back from his shame as the anger flared up once more to take its place and he willingly let it take over. It felt a lot better to be angry than the mix of shame, despair and horror the memories brought with them.

"It's not like I had a choice Emmett." He snapped.

"Sorry, I just...didn't expect it to be her I guess. Lucy's definitely taking after you, she's already smarter than Jessica." He spluttered, only intensifying the glare Edward was pinning him with.

"How did that even happen? It was always obvious Jessica liked you, but I didn't think you were interested." Jasper jumped in before Edward could start another fight with Emmett and preventing Alice from asking any of the hundreds of questions she was sure to have. He could tell from Edward's reactions that there was something else going on than just a drunken mistake and it seemed he was all too happy to let his anger at Emmett mask his actual feelings. While Jasper didn't want to upset him further it was also important that he didn't just pick fights with Emmett constantly. If he and Lucy really were in danger, which it seemed they were, then they were going to need Emmett around and there was certainly no way he was going to let Alice direct the anger at her through misplaced questions. Of everyone in the room it was best that he take the fall if Edward wanted to unleash his anger on someone.

"I wasn't, I didn't even know her. Riley spiked my drink." Edward explained grudgingly. He could hear Alice whispering something to Jasper then and realised she probably hadn't been told about the circumstances that had brought Lucy to them. He looked to her and saw her staring back at him with glossy eyes and quickly had to look away again. He didn't want to rehash everything right then, the conversation was already bad enough as it was. Thankfully Jasper kept it moving and didn't leave Alice any chance to ask anything. He always had been the rational one, never letting emotions get in the way of logic.

"If they drugged you and then she left Lucy with you the way she did, then why would James be coming after you now? It was all on their terms."

"And how can he threaten his own niece?" Emmett added but no one had any answers for either question so they ended up sat in silence for a minute while everyone tried to think of something that would explain what was going on and Edward tried to calm down.

"We're still missing something important." Carlisle stated when it was clear no one had anything else to add, "It just doesn't make sense."

"Well I don't remember anything else so why are we even talking about it? We know who they are...great. It makes no difference. They're still out there, probably trying to work out a way to get to Lucy while we sit here dredging up things I certainly don't want to think about." Edward grumbled, no longer interested in trying to work out James' motives if it meant going over that night anymore especially as he was sure they wouldn't be able to stop him anyway.

"I'm sorry Edward but we need to work out what's going on. Do you remember anything odd from that party Jasper? We were meaning to talk to you about it anyway but we hadn't had chance and maybe something you remember could trigger more of Edward's memories." Carlisle stated, turning to Jasper with no intention of giving up until they'd exhausted every possible idea.

"Which party was it?" Jasper asked, trying to ignore the way Edward was glaring at him.

"The last one Edward ever went to. You and Peter talked him into going then at some point he lost you. You guys had to help me get him home at the end of the night because we thought he was drunk." Emmett answered while Edward sat scowling. He really couldn't take much more of this.

"Oh, we didn't really see much of him at all that night. Peter was stalking Angela Weber and he needed me for moral support so we didn't see much of anyone really except her and her friends. It was just a normal party until we found Edward at the end of the night." Jasper responded.

"There were no fights or anything?" Carlisle asked only for Jasper to shake his head.

"Hang on, wasn't Angela friends with Jessica? You must have seen her at some point." Emmett cut in and hearing her name again was the final straw for Edward.

"Ok, I've had enough and I'm tired. I'm going to bed." Edward suddenly announced, halting any comment Jasper may have made as he stood and stalked out of the room before anyone else could say anything more. He'd been trying so hard to put the events of that night behind him so he could move on with Bella and now they were dragging it all back up there was no way he could sit there and listen to it and he certainly had no interest in trying to trigger more memories. He was having enough problems with the ones he already had. He'd told them everything he knew, if they wanted to sit and stew over it all for the night they could, but he wouldn't be part of it. It was all pointless anyway as he knew James wouldn't give up no matter what his reasons were. There was no stopping him. Edward just hoped that Bella would understand why he needed to get out of that room without even saying goodbye to her. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt or upset her but he just had to get out.

As he sat on his bed five minutes later, realising he was still far too angry and not tired enough to sleep it appeared his worries about upsetting Bella were unfounded as his door slowly opened and she slid into the room.

"Hey." She mumbled quietly as she sat down beside him and he instantly felt some of the tension leave him just because she was there and they were on their own.

"Hey," He responded, glancing up at her before dropping his gaze to where he was pulling at a loose thread on his duvet cover, "I'm sorry for walking out like that, I just couldn't sit there as they talked about that night anymore."

"I know and it's ok." She said, "You know they're just trying to help though right?"

"Yes," He sighed, "But it doesn't matter. James isn't going to stop until he's ready. Even if we knew why he was doing this I doubt it would help."

"It'd be better to know though surely?"

"Maybe, I don't know. It's not like it matters though considering we don't know anything."

"So what are you going to do?"

"Same as I always have I guess. Pretend everything's ok and muddle through as best I can. While Lucy's at school she should be safe and I guess if Emmett's sticking around here James shouldn't be able to get in when she's at home." He responded making Bella feel a little uneasy as she realised that only covered Lucy's safety.

"What about you? You're in on your own all day." She asked hesitantly.

"I'll keep the doors locked." He shrugged, finally glancing up to see Bella watching him with worried eyes and biting her bottom lip. Seeing she had his attention the worry was replaced by determination as she sat up on her knees in front of him and held his face in between her hands, forcing him to keep his eyes on her.

"Promise me you'll look after yourself, not just Lucy. I don't think I can stand to see you hurt again." She said quietly but clearly causing him to wrap his hands around her waist and pull her into him so he could wrap his arms around her properly.

"I will, I'm so sorry you ever had to see me like that." He responded before catching her in a kiss. It was still amazing to him that after everything she already knew about him, and how low she'd seen him that she was still there. That she could care about him so much on top of that was just astounding and not having the words to express how much that meant to him in that moment he showed her.

Bella easily fell into his kiss even though she was a little surprised he was so willing to go there considering what the conversation he'd fled from must have brought to mind. His thoughts however seemed to be firmly with her as his hands moved through her hair and he deepened their kiss. She could feel the stress of the night draining away from both of them, the tension in his shoulders fell away underneath her hands and her worried thoughts drifted away into a pleasure filled haze. For someone so new to the idea of relationships and intimacy he certainly had a natural talent for making her loose all sense of rational thought.

When the need for air finally broke them apart Bella was stunned to find herself straddling Edward's lap as he sat leant against his headboard. His hands had found their way to her hips, holding her in place and whether he'd pulled her into their current position or if she'd initiated the move she had no idea. Her hands were resting on his shoulders in what appeared to have been an attempt to steady herself but his hair was even more messed up than normal indicating she'd had her hands in it at some point. He watched her with contented eyes and a relaxed smile making her feel comfortable where she was and not feel the need to extricate herself to return to her original seat beside him.

"Thank you." He said quietly after they'd both caught their breath and could actually speak.

"What for?" She asked with confusion, reaching forward to brush the few strands of hair which had fallen down in front of his eyes back off his face only to be distracted as she ran her hand through his hair again to ensnare the wayward strands into his usual style and prevent them from falling back down.

"Making all the bad thoughts go away." He answered her, bringing her back out of her thoughts to smile a little unsurely, not knowing how to take his words. She was glad she could help him feel better but she didn't want the bad thoughts to be there in the first place. Edward didn't seem to be looking for a response though as he moved his hands back into her hair, pulling her face back to his and capturing her in another kiss.

Carried away in the feel of smooth, demanding lips pressed against her own, when he sucked on her lower lip before tentatively letting his tongue brush against it she eagerly opened to him, moaning as their tongues tangled together and all rational thought left her again. Before she was even consciously aware of the thought of needing to be closer, her hands, seemingly on their own accord, had found their way to the edge of Edward's t-shirt and as her fingers slid underneath the fabric and onto his bare skin, his hands left the silkiness of her hair in favour of trailing a path down either side of her neck before brushing over her throat to tickle against her collar bones. She gasped as his touch inched lower, playing with the edge of top, his hands brushing against her chest as he did and suddenly needing more air she pulled away from the kiss only for him to dive into her neck, placing soft kisses from underneath her ear to her throat. In turn, her hands traced further up as she tried to memorize the feel of his skin underneath her finger tips even with the distraction of his kisses.

It was just as she thought she couldn't take anymore of his teasing kisses and was about to pull him back to her lips that her hands reached his ribs. The feel of the bones, still more prominent than they should be jolted her out of their lusty haze. It was the reminder she needed that not only was he still healing physically but he wouldn't be ready for where they were quickly headed emotionally either.

"We should stop." She mumbled, pulling back reluctantly and bringing Edward back from where he'd retraced his steps to be buried in her neck again. With a groan he backed off, letting his head fall back against his headboard in an attempt to avoid further temptation.

"I'm sorry." He muttered, his voice slightly rougher than usual, "You're too tempting and it feels so good."

"Don't apologise, it's the same for me. I just don't think it's a good idea for us to go too far too soon." She responded, brushing her fingertips up and down his sides, still beneath his t-shirt so he could be sure she wasn't rejecting him. "I should probably be going home soon anyway. Esme and Carlisle said they could give me a lift on their way home."

"I don't want you to go." He said quietly, his fingers toying with the bottom of her top now that his hands had retreated to the safer spot of her hips.

"I don't either but it's getting late so they'll be leaving soon and I don't want to put them out by making them wait." She responded, finding it hard to try and pull herself away from him as the contented smile had been replaced by a slightly troubled frown.

"Then stay?" He asked tentatively, studiously avoiding her gaze as he watched his hands instead.

"What?" She question, startled by what she thought he'd asked but not totally opposed to the idea. When she saw the light blush on his cheeks and he mumbled something too low for her to hear she finally forced herself to remove her hands from underneath his t-shirt so she could tilt his chin up to make him look at her. "Tell me?"

"Stay here tonight? Please?" He repeated, able to get the words out when he saw her comforting smile.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" She asked, not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable at all and they were already doing far too well at getting carried away.

"Just to sleep. I can't...you know...not yet. It's just...its better when you're here." He muttered embarrassedly, silently cursing that fact he felt so awkward. He just wanted her there, she helped him focus on the good things. He'd much rather go to sleep thinking of the achievement he'd made in managing to kiss her, rather than the threat James had made against Lucy. The progression in their relationship just made him want to be closer to her as well and the thought of her leaving right then actually felt painful. He needed her with him.

"Would it be ok with Lucy?" She asked, wanting nothing more than to say yes to him but still unsure.

"She loves you, so long as you don't mind being attacked by a hyperactive five year old first thing in the morning then I don't think there'd be any problems there." He answered leaving her with only two minor problems to solve as he watched her hopefully.

"Then I guess I better text my mum and let her know I won't be home." She responded with a smile, "And can I borrow a t-shirt? I don't think corsets were designed for sleeping in."

"I think I should be able to find you one." Edward said happily, leaning forward and kissing her cheek before lifting her off his lap so he could get up, apparently eager to get ready for bed as he headed straight for his chest of drawers and started hunting through his t-shirts. Bella watched him from her spot on his bed after she'd sent the text to her mum and couldn't help but continue to smile. After the unpleasant turn their evening had taken at the club it was good to see him looking so happy again especially as it was because of her. She really liked being the reason for his beautiful smile.

When he turned back around, a t-shirt clutched in his hand the expression on his face was the almost giddy excitement Bella had only ever seen on his face in relation to Lucy. It sent a warm, almost aching sensation through her as she realised that such a simple thing as agreeing to sleepover could give him that. As he handed her the shirt it looked familiar and once it was in her hands, and she'd unfolded it she could see it was the one she'd assumed to be his favourite due to the worn off print and the fact Lucy had chosen it first when packing his bag for the hospital. It was just as soft as she'd thought it would be the day he'd been wearing it in her kitchen. He was still smiling as he watched her gently run her hand over the fabric and he seemed eager to see her in it as he told her he was going to get ready for bed and dashed out of the room before she could even say anything.

Bella briefly wondered if she ought to inform everyone else that she was staying over for the night but Edward seemed happier pretending the rest of them weren't there and she didn't want to ruin his newly improved mood so she decided against it. They'd work it out for themselves when she didn't reappear and she really didn't want to start them talking. It wasn't really any of their business anyway, and knowing how private Edward liked to be she knew he wouldn't appreciate them talking about their relationship. Instead she stayed where she was, feeling a little awkward now she was in Edward's room by herself. She'd been on a couple of dates before, but it would be the first time she'd ever stayed over at a guy's house. With Edward she knew it would be innocent, more for comfort than anything but it still felt important to her and so set off her nerves a little. Even with the nerves though she knew it was right the thing to do, he so rarely asked anyone for anything that it proved he really wanted her there and she was glad he'd voiced that. She just hoped Emmett wouldn't make a big deal of it in the morning and scare him off from asking for anything again.

Edward hurried through brushing his teeth, for once impatient to get to bed. He knew he probably should mention to Esme, Carlisle and Emmett that Bella would be staying over but he really didn't want to face them again that night, and like Bella, he figured they'd work it out for themselves eventually. They were probably still rehashing everything they now knew about James in an attempt to work out what was going on between them anyway which just reinforced his desire to stay well away from the living room. Once he'd finished, he searched through the bathroom cabinet and was pleased when he found the spare toothbrush he'd thought was in there. Lifting it out of its hiding place behind the container of cotton wool balls, he set it down on the edge of the sink, the sight of it making him smile again before he left the bathroom.

Even with his eagerness to rejoin Bella, Edward still stopped by Lucy's room on his way back to his own. Carefully pushing the door open, he quietly made his way to her bed and knelt down at the side of it. She was still sleeping peacefully, her arms tightly wrapped around Charlie the penguin and a small smile on her face as she dreamed. Watching her for a couple of minutes he was reassured that she was still ok and with the knowledge that Bella was waiting for him he leant over to lightly kiss her forehead before pushing himself to his feet and leaving her room just as quietly as he'd entered.

Opening his bedroom door to see Bella sitting on his bed, smiling nervously at him made him wish she could be there more often. Wanting to make the most of the time he'd have with her while she was there he quickly offered her the spare toothbrush so they could get into bed as soon as possible, feeling oddly proud when she gratefully accepted the offer and moved past him for the bathroom, his t-shirt still in her hands.

Bella was glad the top Rosalie had picked out for her fastened with hooks and eyes up the front, rather than using the laces that tightened it at the back. She was already nervous, and she dreaded to think how bad it would have been having to ask Edward to help unlace her. It would have been too much for both of them. Thankfully though that dilemma would get to wait for another day as the corset came away easily, allowing her to pull Edward's t-shirt over her head and sigh in relief. The corset may have looked pretty but the soft fabric of the t-shirt was so much comfier and she finally felt like she could take a proper breath. Moving in front of the mirror she almost wanted to laugh at the sight of her absolutely swimming in the t-shirt. It highlighted just how small she was in comparison to Edward as she knew it fitted him well and that warm almost achy feeling was back again. It was the same length on her as some of the shorter mini dresses Rosalie had talked her into buying which would definitely make sleeping a little easier but she didn't feel comfortable running around Edward's flat like that so she kept her jeans on for the time being. Turning back to the sink she picked up the toothbrush Edward had set out for her and couldn't help smiling amusedly at it thinking about the proud look on his face when he'd offered it to her. She hurried through brushing her teeth before looking back at the mirror and wondering what to do about her make-up. Deciding it would only end up rubbing off on Edward's sheets or turning her into a panda while she slept if she left it on she opened the bathroom cabinet door to see if there was anything that could help. Seeing the cotton wool balls right at the front of the shelf she took a couple out and set about scrubbing at the eye make-up. It took longer than if she'd had make-up remover but eventually her face was clear and she was ready for bed. After taking a final deep calming breath she managed to slip out of the bathroom and back into Edward's room without bumping in to anybody else.

Edward was already in bed but he turned towards the sound of the opening door and Bella saw his eyes widen as he saw her, automatically making her blush. She shuffled awkwardly for a moment before she sat her corset down on the floor by the bed, pulled her converse and socks off then reached for the button on her jeans figuring it shouldn't feel embarrassing as the t-shirt would still cover all the important spots and if she couldn't undress around him then she certainly shouldn't have agreed to stay over. She could feel his eyes on her as the denim slid down her legs and when she looked back up from the floor as she stepped out of them her face was flaming red but the sexy smirk on his face suggested he rather liked what he was looking at making her feel a little less self conscious.

"I'm sorry for staring but you look really good in that t-shirt." He mumbled once she'd climbed into bed beside him and he'd pulled her in close so her head was rested on his chest.

"Hmm not sure I believe you but thank you." She responded thinking she had to look at least a little ridiculous but snuggling down anyway and being presently surprised at how natural it felt to be there. All traces of her nerves and embarrassment had left the instant he'd slid his arms around her and any worries she'd had of not being able to fall asleep were dispelled as she listened to the steady, soothing beat of his heart and she could feel the tiredness from the stressful day catching up with her.

"You really do and thank you for this." He replied quietly, tightening his arms just a little and burying his face into her hair. She had no idea just how much better he felt having her there. He knew all his problems would still be there to greet him in the morning, but right then he could absorb himself in Bella and ignore the more unpleasant aspects of their night.

She was already falling asleep so the only response he got to his words was an unintelligible sleepy murmur but he was perfectly content to just hold her. The whole day had been filled with ups and downs. The nerves and fear during the day, then the joy and accomplishment of surviving the club and the amazement of how it felt to kiss Bella only for it all to be ruined by James and Emmett. It was nice to just lay there and be able to relax, something that would not have been possible if Bella wasn't there. He would have spent the night awake and worrying, or suffering through nightmares but with her in his arms it all drifted away as she consumed his thoughts. All he could think of was the taste of her lips, the softness of her skin, the warmth in her smile, the colour of her blush, the feel of her pressed against him as they danced and the sight of her dressed in just his t-shirt which was somehow even more appealing than the corset had been. It was probably good that she'd fallen asleep so quickly as it would have been much too easy to get carried away considering how appealing she looked and the direction his thoughts had headed. As much as he'd have loved to just get lost in everything that was Bella deep down he knew it would be far too much, far too soon. Even so, as he looked at her, asleep peacefully on his chest he couldn't wait to experience everything he'd already felt again and it left him wondering about the possibility of future dates where it would be just the two of them. No children, no friends, no annoying brothers so he could give her his undivided attention. He really liked the idea of it and as he thought about it more he knew it wouldn't be long before he had to speak to Esme to try and arrange something.

As he watched her sleeping, waiting for sleep to finally claim him too, Edward came to a startling realisation. Bella had quickly come to mean almost as much to him as Lucy did. The short time she'd been in their lives she had not only made Lucy fall in love with her but she'd done something so much harder. With a little help from Lucy's match making skills which had made it impossible for him to ignore her she'd broken through all his walls and burrowed her way into his heart. He had fallen for the beautiful girl in his arms, something he'd been sure he'd never do for anyone and as hard as it was for him to believe he knew it was it true.

He was in love with Bella Swan.

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><p><em>AN - This chapter was an absolute nightmare to write. I think this is about the tenth version of it and I only just finished editing it five minutes ago so I hope you guys like it a lot more than I do! I'm not sure if the next chapter will be ready in time for next Saturday, so far Edward is being very uncoperative and with the amount of time I had to spend sorting this chapter out I've gotten a little behind schedule. I shall do my best though.<em>

Well done to those of you who correctly guessed who James was, I think some of you got it really early on :)


	34. Chapter 32 The Morning After

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

_AN - Thank you for all the reviews, favourites and alerts for the the last chapter. They are all very much appreciated. I totally surprised myself managing to get this ready to post for today...I only finished the first draft this morning. It took a bit of an unexpected turn but I decided to roll with it, I hope you like it..._

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><p><strong>Chapter 32 – The Morning After<strong>

Bella was woken by the harsh sound of Edward coughing. It sounded painful and as she struggled to wake up properly and force her eyes open the coughing ended to be replaced by laboured, wheezy breathing.

"Morning." He croaked when he heard the sheets rustle as she stirred and assumed she was awake although he didn't move to check as he was having a hard enough time catching his breath as it was. He had hoped she'd stay asleep a little longer, not wanting her to see him as he was but he should have known she wouldn't be able to sleep through the coughing. It had been going on too long.

"Are you ok?" She asked concerned as with her eyes now open she could see he was sat leant over, one arm wrapped around himself, holding his ribs while he struggled to breathe normally, wincing on every forced deep breathe in.

"Bad coughing fit, I'll be fine in a minute." He explained glancing back at her with what was meant to be a reassuring smile but it turned into a pained grimace as he accidently twisted his ribs a little. He hadn't had a coughing fit that bad since the week before and he'd hoped he'd seen the last of them but his aching ribs and chest were lasting proof that wasn't the case. It seemed that after all the fun of the day before his body had decided it was time to let him know that he was still ill, no matter how much better he had been feeling. He'd been looking forward to waking up with Bella beside him but now he just felt miserable; he hurt, the coughing had managed to exhaust him and Bella was looking at him worriedly showing he'd already ruined their morning.

"Come on, lean back, it'll help your breathing." Bella suggested, recalling the advice he'd been given when he'd woken up in hospital and springing into action to help him sit back against the headboard, wincing when he hissed in pain. "Where are your painkillers?"

"I don't know, probably in the kitchen." He answered as Emmett usually kept track of them and he hadn't even needed them the last couple of days. It was a sharp reminder of just how much he'd let himself grow to depend on Emmett and it made his mood even worse as he was still furious with him.

"Ok, well I'll go have a look for them. You stay here and get your breath back."

"You don't need to do that, I'll be fine in a couple of minutes." He protested but she was already out of bed and pulling her jeans back on. She shook her head, a slightly amused smile on her face as she fastened her jeans before looking up at him.

"I know you will, but you'll be a lot better after the painkillers and maybe then you and Lucy would like to spend the day at my house." She suggested making him smile a little despite the pain that was still bothering him.

"I guess I can't argue with logic like that." He commented and happy she'd won that argument so easily she climbed back onto the bed briefly to give him a chaste good morning kiss before leaving the room.

The rest of the flat was still dark and quiet so Bella did her best to move quietly, especially as she passed the sofa which was struggling to hold a rather uncomfortable looking Emmett who was still fast asleep. Making it into the kitchen without waking him she started to quietly search for Edward's pills. She knew exactly what she was looking for having always paid close attention to what he needed while in the hospital and once he'd been home. It only took a few attempts at pulling out drawers and opening cupboard doors before she found them and with them triumphantly clutched in her hand she got a glass of water before retracing her steps back to Edward's room. Once there she handed him the pills and water before stripping her jeans off again and diving back into the bed.

"It's cold." She explained when she noticed Edward was watching her burrow into his covers instead of taking his medication.

"Sorry, it's a little early for the heating to come on yet." He said having already glanced at the clock while waiting for her to return and seeing it was only shortly after eight. "We don't usually get up on weekends until nine or ten."

"That just gives us an excellent excuse to stay in bed for a while then." She responded cheerfully trying to lighten his mood and after he'd taken the pills and put the glass down she moved over and tucked herself into his uninjured side. He'd managed to get his breathing back under control while she'd been gone so he happily wrapped his arm around her, holding her to him and loving how it felt. Maybe they'd be able to salvage the morning after all as now he'd had his painkillers Bella didn't seem to be put off at all and it was starting to look like what he'd imagined their morning to be the night before.

"Do you still get the coughing fits a lot?" Bella asked after a few minutes of just enjoying where she was. It might have only been her first time at staying over but she already knew she'd want to do it again and again, as many times as Edward would let her even if she did get woken up early by his coughing fits. She was curious about them though as she'd thought he was doing a lot better but then she hadn't really spent a great deal of time with him in the last week. No one else had said anything about him still being ill either and she knew Esme or Emmett would have said something, but he had been spending the days on his own and she wondered if he was using that as an opportunity to make out he was feeling a lot better than he actually was considering no one was there to see.

"No, that was the first one in a few days. I'd thought they'd gone really but I guess last night was a little too much." He answered quietly. He didn't really want to talk about it but she'd only worry about him if he didn't and he really didn't want that, especially when there was no reason to be worried in the first place.

"It was pretty stressful, and a late night I guess. How are you feeling about it all anyway now that you've slept on it?" Bella asked shuffling a little so she could see his expression since it was a touchy subject he most likely wouldn't want to talk about.

"You mean do I still want to chuck Emmett out?" He questioned, assuming that would be the main thing they would all be concerned with.

"Well yeah, but not just that. What James said last night, and finding out he's Lucy's Uncle...that can't be easy to deal with." She replied hesitantly, not really wanting to bring it all back up but curious as to where his head was at. It would be dangerous and stupid to just disregard everything that had happened and even though he was reluctant to talk about it, it wouldn't do him any good to keep his feelings to himself.

"I'm still angry with Emmett and if I could, I would throw him out. What he did...even though he didn't know what it would mean, he still went against what I asked and his inability to listen to me has put Lucy in danger. I can't just look past that but I know Jasper had a point. She will be safer with him here so I'm not going to force him to leave, I just can't promise I'll like having him around and as for James, I don't know. I don't care that he's related to Lucy by blood, he's not her family, none of them are. Not after everything they've done and the way they just abandoned her."

"Do you think they might want her back?" Bella had thought about it being a possible reason for everything as soon as Edward had announced just who James was in relation to Lucy. Considering how the conversation had been going at the time she'd kept quiet but she had wondered if they were just trying to take Edward out of the picture to get to Lucy. From the wording James had used in his threat he hadn't specifically said they would hurt her, just that she was fair game. That could have meant they wanted to take her but she was certain that would be just as bad to Edward. He was so close to Lucy that he'd be destroyed without her which was just another reason they'd have to take her. If they really wanted him to suffer that would be the best way to go about it.

"No, if she was what they really wanted they'd have taken her already. She's not the aim for all of this. I'm certain of that." He responded quickly but she felt him shiver slightly and knew that just the idea of it upset him even if he didn't believe that was what they wanted.

"Already taken her? When would they have...hang on..." She started to ask only to suddenly remember the conversation she'd had with Garrett and Lucy in the hospital that at the time hadn't made much sense. "When you were in hospital and we were trying to work out what had happened, Lucy said something that at the time we didn't think made much sense, but she said Victoria had been here, when you weren't around. Was she telling the truth and that's when you think they would have taken her and why she's not what they want?"

"Yeah. If they'd wanted her, they would have taken her then. Just the thought of it terrifies me." He responded quietly and she knew she was into rough territory for Edward as she could already feel he'd tensed up so she reached out the hand she'd had laid across to his stomach to grasp his hand while turning her head to press a kiss over his heart before she spoke again. She didn't want him to think she was thinking badly of him but considering they were still trying to piece everything together it seemed like an important part of the jigsaw and as he hadn't already told anyone the details she had to try and find out what had happened.

"When was that?"

"Do you remember the first time we talked? When I was covered in bruises? It was just after Lucy had been off school ill." He said, feeling uncomfortable telling her how he'd failed Lucy. If she hadn't been wrapped around him he doubted he could have told her for the fear she'd finally see what a terrible person he was and leave but she had to already know where the story was headed and she was just moving closer, not running away like he'd have expected.

"Yeah, of course I do." She responded thinking it would be impossible for her to forget that day since it was the first time they'd spoken to each other and it had been the start of their current relationship. She didn't think she'd ever forget a moment she'd spent with him, no matter what they were doing.

"It was that weekend. We'd run out of food in the house as Lucy fell ill when I was due to do the food shop so I couldn't do it. When she started to feel better I knew I needed to get something in for her to eat but I didn't want her to leave the flat in case she got sick again. By that point she was well enough that I figured so long as I was quick she would just sleep through me being gone. She should have been safe, she knows what she can and can't touch in the flat and as I said, I was sure she'd just be asleep anyway so I told myself it was ok. I don't know what happened after I left the flat, I never made it to the shops and I woke up in an alleyway that night. By the time I made it home it was morning, Lucy was terrified and the flat had been ransacked. Nothing was taken, Lucy wasn't hurt and I was in too much of a state to really think much of it other than making sure Lucy was ok. When we saw Victoria again Lucy told me it was her that had been in the flat, so I assume it was James that led to me being beaten and left in the alley. She was in the flat, on her own, the entire time they searched it. They had to have known she was here considering they seem to spend all their time stalking me yet they didn't even look for her when she hid under my bed. I should never have left her on her own."

"It sounds like you didn't have much of a choice at the time." She tried to reassure him, hearing what he wasn't saying in that last sentence. He found it much too easy to look down on himself and the last thing he should ever be questioning was his parenting ability. The way his life had gone it was clear he'd always done his best for Lucy, even at the expense of his own health and although he'd made a mistake, he hadn't had much of a choice. "You're a wonderful dad and Lucy loves you, she's always bragging about you to Anna so don't start thinking you're anything less. Was that the first time anything happened with James?"

"Yeah and I don't really know what happened. I was out for a long time, I think they must have hit me over the head hard or something as I don't remember it and I was pretty dizzy and woozy when I woke up. I passed out when I got back home too. Lucy cleaned me up which was why I was wearing that plaster with the duck on it." He muttered, figuring since he was telling her the worst parts of that day that he may as well finally explain why he'd been wearing such a ridiculous plaster on his forehead.

"You've been through so much... I don't know how you're still going with all of this." Bella commented, looking up at him in sad wonder. It really was heartbreaking to hear how alone they used to be and just how much he'd been suffering. She was glad it had at least brought some of his family back to him.

"There's nothing else I can do. I just wish they'd leave me alone. I'm so tired of struggling to make everything alright." He sighed.

"Well at least you don't have to manage on your own anymore. We'll get to the bottom of it all somehow and sort it out. Esme and Carlisle are determined and I wouldn't want to mess with them." Bella said before sitting up properly and studying him for a moment. He looked so downhearted and since it was her fault for starting the conversation, she wanted to do something about it. They'd talked over the hard stuff and she was pretty sure he was dealing with it as well as could be expected so it was time to start enjoying their day. "How are your ribs?"

"Not too bad now, why?" He asked, liking the way her eyes seemed to smoulder as she looked at him. Instead of responding she sat up on her knees before moving to straddle him.

"So I can do this." She told him quietly before leaning down to steal a kiss, her hands winding into his hair and making him instantly forget what they'd been talking about just moments before.

"You can do that anytime. I don't care if my ribs hurt or not." Edward commented with a slightly dazed smile when they broke apart. Sitting on his lap, wearing his t-shirt with her hair wild around her face from sleep she'd never looked more beautiful, especially as she smiled mischievously, making her eyes sparkle.

"You'll regret telling me that." She teased, reaching out to mess up his hair only making him laugh.

"Oh I don't think I will." He countered, ducking away from her hand to pull her into him for another kiss. Edward pulled back when he heard the rumble of the heating starting up. It was a sure sign that their time alone was coming to an end as Lucy hardly ever sleep in and after going to bed before they'd made it home the night before he knew she'd be up early to make sure everything was ok and he was home.

"Time to get up?" Bella asked, seeing the semi disappointed look in his eyes as he ran his hands down her sides.

"I don't want to, not with you here like this." He commented, letting his hands briefly touch the bare skin on her thighs before he quickly pulled them back. Not only did her skin feel amazingly soft but touching her there increased the pull he felt to her to dangerous limits and put a fire in her eyes he was sure he wasn't ready to play with yet. "Lucy will be up soon."

"Hmm how about I cook us all some breakfast then?" She said, letting out a sigh when his arms wound around her waist and he let his head rest on her shoulder for a moment, obviously savouring the moment as he inhaled the scent of her hair.

"You're the guest; you shouldn't be the one cooking." He mumbled and being unable to fight the lure he placed a light kiss on her neck.

"Well you're not feeling great, Emmett's still asleep and Lucy would have far too much fun getting breakfast by herself. Plus I honestly don't mind, I like cooking for you guys." She responded, trying to ignore the way it tickled as Edward chuckled, his breath blowing across the sensitive skin of her neck.

"I quite like the idea of letting Lucy do it. It'll give Emmett lots of mess to clear up and she would have fun." He muttered making Bella smile even if he couldn't see it.

"How about I make pancakes and let Lucy help. She can make the mess for Emmett and I can make sure its edible." She compromised and when Edward reappeared from her neck the crooked smile was back.

"I like that idea."

"Good. Emmett's going to have fun living here for a while isn't he?" She asked to which Edward shrugged.

"I'll be civil, but I'm not making it easy for him." He stated and knowing it was the best they were likely to get Bella dropped the subject there. It was Emmett's own fault and she agreed with Edward that even not knowing about the threat to Lucy it was still a stupid idea to go after James the way he had. That didn't mean that if he'd chosen to do it in a dark alley with no one around that she wouldn't have been cheering him on. She'd never hated anyone before, but without even knowing him she was certain she hated James.

They both got up then, Bella looking to her corset for a minute wondering if she ought to put it on again if Lucy was going to be around but when she glanced to Edward with questioning eyes, holding it up he just smiled and shook his head. It didn't matter which she wore, both would show she'd stayed the night as Lucy would just as quickly pick up on the fact the corset was dressy and not at all Bella's usual everyday wear as she would his t-shirt. With that being the case she may as well be comfortable and as much as he'd like the corset he was sure the restrictive fabric and boning wouldn't be very comfortable to wear. He also didn't want to see it ruined and he already knew pancake batter washed out of his t-shirt fine.

"You're sure this is ok? You don't want me to sneak out before Lucy can see?" Bella double checked once they'd both pulled on a pair of jeans, Edward opting for one of his old worn pairs, and were about to leave his room.

"Yes. This isn't just a fleeting thing for me. I want you here a lot if you want to be." He assured her, pulling her into a hug. He trusted her not to hurt them both however strange that was for him.

"It's not for me either and I want to be here. I'm honoured that you can trust me with her, I know it must be hard for you." She murmured into his chest.

"It's easy when it's you." He responded quietly wishing briefly that it he could get the words out that matched the revelation he'd had in the night but he knew it was too soon. He needed a little more time to get his head around it before he announced it.

Having no idea what she could possibly say to something as sweet as that, Bella just reached up to kiss him again, needing to show him how touched she was. What was meant to be a quick kiss quickly morphed into more until she was plastered to his chest, her hands once again in his hair while his had slid to her lower back, underneath the t-shirt. Kissing Bella had definitely turned into Edward's favourite hobby and if the enthusiasm she showed was anything to go by she seemed to feel the same. He didn't want to pull away but when his ribs started to protest he remembered that Lucy would be up soon and that they were meant to be starting breakfast so he started to pull back and Bella seemed to understand as she unwound her fingers from his hair and smiled at him until she noticed he was holding his side again.

"Sorry." She apologised but he smirked a little and shook his head.

"It was worth it." He said cheerfully before pulling open his bedroom door, "Let's go get breakfast started."

Bella was collecting up the ingredients and pots they'd need for pancakes while Edward was making coffee when Lucy skipped into the kitchen. She ran straight for Edward when she saw him there, slamming into him as she wrapped her arms tightly around his waist, the force of it knocking him forward a step before he caught himself on the units.

"Hey baby, I missed you last night." He said, disentangling her arms from around him for a moment so he could turn and pick her up.

"Missed you too Daddy." She told him before kissing his cheek and then laying her head against his shoulder, happy to be in his arms.

"Did you have fun with Esme and Carlisle?" He asked and feeling her nod against his shoulder but not say anything he smiled and kissed her head, content with just holding her for a while as that seemed to be what she wanted. Glancing at Bella he saw her watching them with a smile and when she realised he was looking at her she waved him away from the coffee and to the table, quickly moving over to finish the drinks for him.

It was only when Bella sat Edward's coffee mug and a glass of milk on the table in front of them that Lucy actually realised there was someone else in the kitchen. She'd been so focussed on her daddy, relieved to see him there and looking the same as he had the day before that she'd not stopped to look around the room any further. Now though she looked up and straight to Bella and they both watched her take in Bella's outfit. She stared at the t-shirt for a minute, her head tilting to one side before she looked up at Bella's face then back to Edward's. They both watched her apprehensively as she stayed silent but then a small smile appeared which grew to a large grin as she looked between them again so they both relaxed a little.

"Why's Bella wearing your t-shirt?" She finally asked, looking up at Edward and the smile on her face told him she knew the answer already. She really was far too smart sometimes and he was glad they hadn't been trying to hide their growing relationship from her. It never would have worked.

"She stayed here last night." He told her and couldn't help smiling when he saw the light blush on Bella's cheeks before she quickly turned back to the units to hide it.

"Does that mean she's your girlfriend now?" She asked hopefully and he tried not to laugh when the wooden spoon Bella had just pulled out of a drawer fell with a clatter to the units. Lucy's usual bluntness obviously hadn't been anticipated.

"I think so, though we probably ought to ask Bella." He answered Lucy, forcing Bella to face them again and when she did, she was clutching the spoon she'd just dropped so hard her knuckles were white and her blush was back full force.

"Are you Daddy's girlfriend?" Lucy asked as soon as soon as she realised Bella was paying attention and Bella stared at them for a moment wondering how Edward could sit there so unflustered by Lucy's questions. He was meant to be the inexperienced one yet he looked perfectly at ease with it all while she couldn't stop the blush from giving her away. Something that only got worse when she could see the amusement in Edward's eyes. He was enjoying watching her squirm as she tried to work out what to say to Lucy.

"Yes." She finally managed to answer since Edward had already suggested she was and it was what she wanted anyway even if she hadn't been expecting to announce it to his daughter herself. Before either of them could wonder what Lucy's response would be, she'd already jumped off Edward's lap and thrown herself at Bella with a happy squeal.

"Thank you!" She said quietly but reverently once Bella had leaned down to return her hug.

"What for?" Bella questioned not understanding why Lucy felt the need to thank her. Glancing up at Edward quickly she saw that although he was still smiling, he was also looking at Lucy a little curiously. The kitchen was too small for him not to have heard what she'd said even though she'd said it quietly.

"You make Daddy happy." Lucy answered and with her eyes still locked on Edward Bella saw his expression soften as he stared at Lucy.

"Well he makes me happy too so you really don't need to thank me." She responded, tearing her gaze away to focus back on Lucy whose smile only grew when Bella hugged her a little tighter before letting go.

"Are you making pancakes?" Lucy asked then, peering up at the units and instantly recognizing the items Bella had taken out, apparently having said all she thought needed to be said on the matter of Bella staying over. When Bella nodded, a little taken aback by the quick change in subjects Lucy's excitement went into overdrive.

"Can I help?"

She didn't even wait for an answer before running over to the table, grabbing hold of a chair and dragging it over next to where Bella was standing then climbing up on it so she could reach the units.

Edward watched them from his seat at the table feeling a little overwhelmed. He'd known Lucy wouldn't have a problem with Bella being there, but the way she'd thanked Bella for making him happy had been a surprise. He'd assumed she was so fond of her purely because she liked her, not because she'd noticed the effect she had on him. It was clear now though that her attempts at pushing them together had been for him and it made him wonder what he could have done to ever deserve such a wonderful daughter. Seeing her and Bella interact just added to that wonder. They were so easy together, laughing and having fun as Bella let Lucy help her. He was torn between wanting to get up to join in the fun and staying where he was to watch them. The twinge in his ribs when he shifted his position a little decided the matter for him though so he settled back to watch them and as soon as the batter was mixed Lucy ran back over to him and climbed onto his knee.

"What did you do last night?" She asked while shuffling slightly to get comfortable, making him wince a little as she knocked his side but he didn't say anything as he was enjoying her excitement far too much.

"We went to a restaurant, then we met Auntie Alice, Jasper, Bella's friend Rosalie and her friends at a club." He told her, watching her think that through before she came up with her next question. He was sure there were going to be a lot of them.

"What did you do there?" She asked.

"I danced with Bella for a while." He said unable to hide the grin the thought of that caused making Lucy smile back at him before she looked to Bella again.

"Is Daddy good at dancing?" She asked her and after flipping over the pancake she was cooking, Bella looked over at them.

"He's very good at it." She said and the light blush that rose in her cheeks let him know she wasn't just talking about the dancing but more the activity they got distracted by whilst on the dance floor. She didn't look embarrassed though as she smiled at them, watching Edward's grin drop into a smirk.

"Bella taught me well." He commented to Lucy who looked at him in confusion when he started laughing as Bella's blush deepened. Bella meanwhile turned back to the pancakes, willing her blush to go away. It seemed Edward was still having fun watching her flustered in front of Lucy and though she knew Lucy had no idea what they were actually talking about it still felt wrong to be alluding to it in front of her.

"What's all the laughter about?" Emmett broke into their cosy morning as he wandered in from the living room, still rubbing the sleep from his eyes and yawning. His appearance instantly changed Edward's laughter into a scowl as just the sight of him reminded him of all the bad things that had happened the night before which Bella had successfully been distracting him from.

"Nothing." He muttered quietly and Lucy shot another confused look at him before looking at Emmett.

"Bella is Daddy's girlfriend now." She informed him happily making Emmett glance between Edward and Bella who was just sitting two plates of pancakes on the table in front of Edward and Lucy's usual spot.

"Really? That's good." He humoured Lucy while being distracted by the fact he'd just noticed what Bella was wearing. It hadn't taken them long to realise Bella was staying over the night before as Esme had gone to check on them before they'd left to see if she'd still wanted a lift only to come back and inform everyone they were both asleep and she didn't want to disturb them. He'd assumed they'd just unintentionally fallen asleep after talking but now looking at how at home Bella appeared he doubted that assumption. While he was thrilled they were getting along so well he was a little worried. After what they'd all recently learned about Lucy's mother and what she'd done he didn't think Edward would be ready for sleepovers for a while and he certainly didn't think it could be a good idea when he was in the state he'd been the night before. Looking between them both now though it seemed that everything was fine and he was the only problem if the way Edward was scowling at him was anything to go by.

"Bella stayed here." Lucy added happily unaware of her Uncle's thoughts, "And they danced!"

Bella watched Emmett's expression go from concern to shock with that news and knowing a little of Emmett's dating history she knew exactly what he was thinking as he looked between them, his eyes lingering on the t-shirt she was wearing a little longer than necessary.

"Not the way you're thinking." She told him quietly enough so that neither Lucy nor Edward would hear as she gave him a plate of pancakes. He doubtfully looked up at her but she just glared back at him, silently warning him not to say anything that he was currently thinking. She didn't really care whether he believed her or not, she just didn't want him to say anything that would set Edward's anger off again so soon, especially not with Lucy in the room. Luckily he seemed to heed the warning as he concentrated on his pancakes and Edward had missed the whole interaction as he'd been watching Lucy while she climbed down from his lap and onto her own chair to eat. Happy that Emmett was staying quiet, Bella took her own seat and as they all ate Edward turned the conversation round to Lucy, wanting to know everything about her night with Esme.

It was after they'd finished eating and Lucy had run off to her room to find the pictures she'd made with Esme so she could show them to Edward and Bella that Emmett decided he couldn't stay quiet any longer. Apart from Bella staying over they still had a lot to talk about regarding James and they needed to sort out their argument.

"We need to talk." He announced drawing both Edward and Bella's attention.

"No, we don't." Edward countered, going back to watching Bella slowly collect up the plates and deciding to help her.

"Yes we do. We need to talk about James and this argument between us is stupid. We need to sort it out." Emmett pushed.

"There's nothing to say about James and I don't want to talk to you." Edward snapped, standing up too fast and making his ribs complain.

"Come on! You can't just pretend nothing's going on and are your ribs bothering you again?" He asked since Edward was holding his side again while he moved over to join Bella at the sink.

"They're fine. Leave me alone." He grumbled.

"Edward..." Emmett tried again, unwilling to let it just go. They had to talk about it all.

"NO! Just leave me alone!" Edward exploded in return, his voice raising and causing Emmett to start getting angry as well.

"Hey! Both of you stop it! Lucy will be back in here soon. Do you really want her to see the two of you shouting at each other?" Bella stepped in, trying to calm them down.

"Bella you can't agree with him just ignoring all of this..." Emmett tried, trailing off when she didn't back down and instead continued to glare at him.

"He's not ignoring it." She countered. "But now is not the time and you're just going to make it worse."

"But..."

"Daddy look!" Lucy ran in and Edward immediately wiped the anger from his face as he turned to Lucy who was carrying a stack of coloured paper.

"Why don't you go look at those in the living room? Emmett can help me wash up." Bella suggested and when Edward looked to her unsurely she smiled.

"Go, I'll talk to him, it'll be fine." She told him quietly while Lucy started tugging on his hand, totally missing the tension in the room in her excitement.

"Ok, join us soon though? You cooked, so you shouldn't be cleaning up as well." He commented with another scowl at Emmett.

"I don't mind and I'll be through in a minute or two." She answered, kissing his cheek then waving them off before pinning Emmett with another glare as he watched Edward leave.

"Here, I'll wash, you can dry." She stated, picking up the tea towel from the units and chucking it at him. He caught it against his chest and reluctantly moved over to join her at the sink.

"He really can't just ignore James." Emmett muttered as she started to fill the sink.

"I told you, he's not. We talked about it last night and again this morning. Right now though he needs a break from it. Can you not see you all keep pushing him too hard? It's not easy for him and when it gets too hard he shuts down, just like last night." She answered.

"We're pushing him too hard? What about you? You really think he's ready for 'sleepovers'?" Emmett countered feeling a little put out that Bella was telling him how to handle his own brother. It was getting on his nerves that while she apparently could do no wrong as far as Edward was concerned, he couldn't get anything right.

"It wasn't like that! We didn't do anything but sleep. He was upset and it was just comfort." She snapped, "And I don't appreciate you alluding to it being anything else. You know I wouldn't do anything to hurt him."

"I'm sorry, I'm just frustrated that he won't talk to me." He sighed, "If he was upset did he have nightmares again? Is that why his ribs are bothering him?"

"No, he had a coughing fit this morning, that's what hurt his ribs. He didn't have any nightmares."

"Huh...guess that's good then." He commented, starting to calm down now that it was clear Bella staying over had actually done some good if Edward managed to sleep peacefully. While he'd be paying attention for more coughing fits he didn't think that was the most urgent thing to dwell on right then. "So what's he said about James?"

"Not a lot, just that there's nothing that can be done about him and he won't chuck you out so Lucy's safer here. He's certain they're not after Lucy other than to get to him though. That first time he was beaten up, Victoria searched the flat when Lucy was here on her own. They must have known she was here but they didn't even look for her."

"They've been in here? And Lucy was on her own?" He questioned, appalled at the idea of them being there alone with Lucy and seeing the expression on his face Bella felt compelled to defend Edward.

"She'd been ill but they needed food. There wasn't a lot he could do." She said sharply and though that hadn't been what had disturbed him it still brought it back to Emmett just how hard things had been for Edward. It was easy to forget he'd been so alone having never experienced life like that himself.

"Damn, I keep forgetting how hard things were for him. That was before you knew him right?" He asked, the realization he hadn't even had Bella around at that point unsettling him even more.

"Yeah, I spoke to him for the first time the Monday after."

"So they've been here, looking for something?" Emmett asked, trying to get back on track. If they were ever going to make things right for Edward they needed to get to the bottom of what was going on with James, not stand around feeling sorry for things they couldn't change.

"He thinks so, nothing was taken but the living room and kitchen were trashed."

"Well that's something we didn't know before, yet again it doesn't really tell us much though." Emmett sighed. James was playing a very clever game considering how much he seemed to know about them and how little he was giving them to go on.

"It was the start of it, whatever this is so I think we know as much as Edward does now." Bella responded hoping that now she'd filled him in he wouldn't badger Edward about it so much. He really didn't seem up to going over and over it all if the night before was anything to go by.

"I'll let Carlisle and Esme know. They're planning to try and talk to our parents. See if they can learn anything there." Emmett confided awkwardly.

"Edward won't like that." Bella responded, remembering how he always reacted to any mention of his parents.

"They're not planning on telling him unless they find anything out. We've got to try and figure this out somehow and Carlisle just wants to make sure we've followed every lead we can. When James found them he said our parents had told him Edward was with them so he must have spoken to them and if he did, we need to know what was said." Emmett explained and while Bella could see the logic in that she couldn't help but feel Edward wouldn't appreciate it if he found out about it.

"Edward's convinced that it won't matter if we know the reason or not." She commented, wondering just how true that would turn out to be.

"Well we can't just sit here doing nothing, waiting for them to strike again and if Edward won't talk to us we'll just have to find information where we can."

"He wouldn't talk to you anyway, he's still furious with you." She said making Emmett sigh again.

"I wish he would. I know I messed up but I didn't do it intentionally. I just wanted to help him."

"I think he knows that but it doesn't change the fact that Lucy is in danger now and he can't just forget or forgive that."

"But I didn't know it would put her in danger!"

"Makes no difference to him. She's still in danger." Bella shrugged.

"This sucks."

"Yup. I asked him and Lucy to come round to my house today. A change in scenery and some space might help. Maybe after they're home you'll have a better chance at talking to him."

"Are you sure that's a good idea with James on the warpath?" Emmett asked, he didn't want Edward out of his sight where it could be helped and he wasn't sure he liked the idea of them out of the house like that.

"Mum and Anna will be home and as Edward pointed out last night, James doesn't act when there are witnesses around so I doubt he'll try anything there. You'll just end up arguing and upsetting Lucy if he stays here today as well. You saw how quick he was to anger just now, that's not going to improve if he's shut up in here with you."

"Guess you guys will need a lift back to your house then?" Emmett gave in realising she was probably right once again.

"Yeah that would be good."

"Ok, I'll go get ready then."

"Thank you."

The washing up finished, Bella joined Edward in complimenting Lucy on her artistic skills while Emmett showered. Lucy was still bubbling with excitement and although Emmett had dampened Edward's mood, she seemed to be repairing it. When Emmett returned from the bathroom Lucy forced him to look at her pictures while Edward showered before Bella suggested she ought to go and get dressed so they'd be ready to leave when Edward was done. That only seemed to amplify her excitement as she hurried to do as Bella said.

"You're going to have fun with her today." Emmett commented only making Bella smile.

"That's the plan." She answered before leaving Emmett to his own devices as she went to Edward's room to collect all her things together. She was loath to take the comfortable t-shirt off but knowing it was Edward's favourite she thought he probably wouldn't appreciate her keeping it so she reluctantly pulled it over her head and replaced it with her corset. She would shower and change at home. Grabbing her bag, jacket and shoes she headed back to the living room where Emmett was now watching cartoons on TV. Settling on the sofa she pulled her shoes on before looking through her bag for her phone. Pulling it out, the display showed she had two missed calls and a voicemail, all from Rosalie. Frowning as she wondered what she'd be so insistent about she accessed her voicemail and listened to the message, finding herself smiling as she got to the end of it.

"Hey Emmett, give me your phone." She said once the message was finished and confusing Emmett as he pulled his attention away from the TV screen but he handed his phone over anyway.

"What are you doing?" He asked as he watched her fiddle around with it before she typed something in then threw it back to him.

"Seems you did something right last night after all." She commented as he stared at his phone, where the new contact with Rosalie's name on was lit up.

"Is this her actual number?" He asked warily, amusing Bella.

"She left a message on my phone asking if everything was ok here and telling me to give you her number. Looks like you managed to impress her." She explained causing Emmett to smile widely.

"Well that gives me something to do today other than sit around here." He commented happily and then Lucy returned, stealing all of Bella's attention as she skipped in wearing another one of her pretty dresses. It was a simple purple one with oversized buttons fastening each of the shoulder straps on the front of it.

"That's my favourite colour." Bella told her, pointing to the dress and making Lucy smile again.

"I like it too but pink's my favourite." She responded, stopping in front of Bella and holding out her hairbrush along with two purple ribbons and hair ties. "Can you do my hair please?"

"Course I can. Bunches?" She asked, taking the things Lucy offered and guessing what style she wanted as when Lucy had stayed with them she'd always wanted her hair like that for school.

"Yes please." She answered so Bella set to work and by the time Lucy had bunches complete with purple bows Edward had returned, freshly showered and looking way too good in his usual jeans and a plain white t-shirt Bella assumed was one of the ones Alice bought as it was tighter fitting than his normal ones.

"Everyone ready to go?" Emmett asked, turning the TV off and standing up.

"Can I take my dolls?" Lucy asked, running over to Edward who smiled, lightly tugging one of her bunches.

"Not all of them but you can go pick a couple of them." He answered, receiving a hug in response before she ran out of the room.

It didn't take them long then to get ready to go and load into Emmett's car, Lucy happily clutching her school bag which was overflowing with dolls despite Edward's best attempts at persuading her to leave a few more of them at home. The car ride was fairly quiet. Edward was ignoring Emmett although he didn't mind so much now he had Rosalie's number to distract him and when they reached Bella's house Edward didn't even say goodbye but Lucy's hug made up for it and Emmett stayed long enough to watch them get into the house safely before he drove away.

"Where were you?" Anna asked the instant Bella was through the front door. She was standing in the hallway, arms folded across her chest and her eyes narrowed at her sister.

"I was at Edward's flat." Bella answered, calling attention to Edward and Lucy who entered behind her. Lucy waved and smiled but after a brief glance Anna was back to focusing on Bella.

"Why?"

"Because it was already late when we got there and I wanted to stay there." Bella returned while stepping further into the hallway so they could get the front door shut.

"Why?" Anna asked again.

"Just because! What's with all the questions Anna?" Bella snapped, quickly getting irritated by her sister as she knew she'd just continue to ask 'why' to anything she said. Lucy however looked a little baffled by Bella's sharp response so stepped towards her friend to give her a better answer.

"She's Daddy's girlfriend now." She informed her only to be more confused when Anna huffed and stomped her foot.

"I'm telling Mum!" She announced before turning and running off into the kitchen.

"She already knows!" Bella called after her before sighing and turning to Edward and Lucy. "Sorry, she seems to be in one of those moods again."

"That's ok. I'm sure Lucy can cheer her up." Edward commented while Lucy looked up at him doubtfully. She didn't like it so much when Anna was grumpy.

"I hear we've got visitors...what are you all doing standing out here?" Renee asked, appearing in the kitchen doorway with a smile.

"We got stopped on the way in by Anna." Bella explained as she led them all through, Renee stepping aside to let them into the kitchen.

"Ah, did she tell you Phil's going to be home later than planned?"

"No but that does explain the mood. When's he going to be home?"

"Tuesday morning."

"Wonderful." Bella commented feeling a little annoyed that they'd be suffering Anna's bad mood for him once again. She liked Phil but sometimes his work just got in the way too often.

"Yup but that's not important right now. I want to hear all about last night!" Renee responded, apparently unaffected by Phil's unexpected absence in light of the opportunity for new gossip.

"There's not much to tell." Bella said with a pointed glance towards Lucy who seemed to already be cheering Anna up by showing her all the dolls she'd bought with her.

"Ah...you can tell me later then." She responded and from her excited smile Bella could tell she was expecting juicy details, not tales of arguments, fights and threats.

"Ok, I need a shower, can you get Edward a coffee or something? I won't be long." Bella said, glancing to where Edward had gravitated over to the girls and had already got one of the dolls in his hands.

"Sure. Everything's ok right?" Renee asked, noticing that Bella was a lot less excited than she'd expected her to be considering where she'd spent the night. Lucy certainly seemed happy but there was definitely something slightly off with Bella and Edward. They just weren't the sickeningly happy couple she'd expected when she'd realised Bella had brought Edward and Lucy with her after spending their first night together.

"There was some trouble at the club but everyone's ok. I'll tell you about it later." Bella explained quietly before turning to leave. Renee could be spookily observant when she wanted to be, and when she once caught the hint of something she didn't let it drop until she had an answer. It was always easier to just tell her what she wanted to know than to try and hide it but Bella really wanted to leave the full explanation for later, preferably when Edward wasn't around to possibly overhear the conversation.

"Bella wait...what do you mean by trouble?" Renee asked quickly before she could leave. She really didn't like the sound of that.

"James, the man who put Edward in hospital turned up. Emmett broke his nose and he left but he threatened Lucy." Bella whispered hurriedly as she didn't want to draw the girls' attention but she knew Renee really wouldn't give up without some kind of explanation now but it far from settled her.

"Go get your shower but we're talking about this more later. I'm not sure I like you being mixed up in this." Renee responded, the excited smile long gone as she looked at her daughter with worry. She liked Edward and Lucy and she knew how Bella felt about them but if things were getting dangerous then they had to be re-evaluated. She really did not want her daughter getting hurt.

"We'll talk but I can tell you now I'm not leaving him. Nothing anyone does will ever change my mind on that."

"Do you even know what you've got yourself into?" Renee asked, seeing the determination in Bella's eyes and hating that she knew nothing would sway her. Bella was fiercely loyal when she cared about someone and the way she looked at Edward and spoke about him put him right at the top of her priorities. She hoped she knew what she was doing.

"No one does at this point but he needs me and I'm not going to let him down." Bella responded.

"Sorry to interrupt but the girls were wondering if they could watch a DVD." Edward interrupted them, looking warily between them as although he hadn't been able to hear what was being said, he'd noticed the whispered argument taking place.

"Oh sure, I'll get them set up." Renee responded, a little startled by his appearance but quickly rallying the girls up and into the living room across the hall. If one thing was obvious it was that Bella would not want Edward to be aware of what they'd been talking about.

"Is everything ok with Renee?" Edward asked when it was just Bella and him left in the kitchen.

"She's just worried, I had to tell her a little about the club. It'll be fine." She sighed, stepping into him, wrapping her arms around his neck and resting her head against his chest. He returned the hug but looked down at her concerned and a little frightened.

"She doesn't want you around me?" He guessed and she lifted her head to look at his face.

"Since Dad died she worries about things a lot. I'll talk to her later and it'll all be fine. Besides, nothing she could say would make me stay away from you anyway." She answered before reaching up to kiss him but it didn't escape his notice that she hadn't denied his assumption.

Still in need of a shower and change of clothes Bella took Edward up to her room rather than leaving him in the kitchen where Renee could corner him. After telling him to make himself at home and that she wouldn't be long she left him sitting awkwardly on her bed while she headed for the bathroom with the intention of having the quickest shower of her life.

Edward stayed where Bella left him, sitting in the edge of her bed and looked around. It was a large room and the walls would have been a plain white if she hadn't covered virtually every inch of them with photos, drawings and random posters. It was very random and very Bella which made him smile a little. The photos seemed to span her life, as he could see older ones with a brown eyed toddler either playing or surrounded by a younger Renee and a man he'd never seen before who he assumed was her father as he had the same eyes. There were plenty more photos of her parents and lots of faces he didn't know that could have been family or friends. On the wall just above her cluttered desk there was a small collection of photos of a teenage Bella holding a small bundle of blankets in her arms which as he peered closer at he realised must have been Anna and they were surrounded by more showing Anna slowly growing up. Looking at all the photos it was obvious that family and friends meant a lot to Bella and he was struck by the thought that he really needed to get the pictures from their day at the zoo developed and get a copy for her. He wanted to be on her wall, along with everyone else she'd ever cared for.

The rest of her room was just as cluttered as the walls. There were books scattered on every surface and the desk was barely visible under the notebooks, loose sheets of paper and her laptop. Even a few of Anna's toys seemed to have sneaked into the chaos and that kind of reminded him of his home making him feel a little less out of place.

As his gaze finally came to rest on her purple bedspread his thoughts drifted back to the whispered argument he'd seen downstairs. Renee had good reason to be worried about his involvement with Bella. Anyone in his life could become a target for the trouble that followed him and considering how much he cared about Bella she was probably more at risk than anyone other than Lucy. He shouldn't have been asking her to face that but he couldn't stomach the idea of turning away from her. Now he'd let her in, fallen for her, the idea of not having her around made him sick. The only thing worse was imagining what James would do to her and it made him question it all. If he couldn't stand to see her hurt and he couldn't stand the idea of not being around her then what was he meant to do?

"You're thinking too much."

He jumped a little at the sound of Bella's voice coming from right in front of him and when he glanced up she was standing there in a comfortable pair of jeans and a black tank top with her hair wrapped up in a towel on top of her head.

"Renee's right not to want you around me." He stated sadly, looking down at his hands, "It's not safe."

"I don't care and once I explain it to her properly she won't either." Bella responded confidently although just hearing him say something like that made her heart rate increase with the first stirrings of panic.

"James could decide to go after you. He's using Lucy to get to me, if he can't get at her he might go to the next best option and no one means more to me than Lucy and you." Edward responded, glancing up at her briefly and his cheeks reddening slightly with what he'd just admitted. He saw Bella's confident expression soften a little at his words and she stepped towards him, placing a hand against his cheek as she sought out his eyes.

"And that would still be true even if I walked away now wouldn't it? It's too late for backing away. I'd be a target if I was with you or if I wasn't and I'd much rather be with you." She stated and as he looked up at her, seeing the love that neither of them had spoken of yet in her eyes he knew he couldn't turn away. She was right; it was already too late in every sense.

"I'm so sorry." He uttered, choking up a little as he realised just how much he'd messed up. He should never have given in, should have kept his distance no matter how hard it was. She shouldn't have been involved.

"No, don't apologise. It's not your fault." She said sharply, moving her other hand to mirror the first so his face was cupped between them. His eyes were quickly becoming liquid green pools and she silently cursed Renee for planting the doubts and thoughts into his head before she leant in and kissed him softly.

"This is all James. It's his fault. He wants you alone and defenceless and if you back away now you're giving him exactly what he wants. Don't let him ruin this for us."

"I can't be the reason you get hurt." He muttered desperately. Even thinking about it hurt. It was just as bad as imagining Lucy in James' hands and it would be all his fault. He couldn't live with that. It would break him as surely as loosing Lucy would.

"And you won't be, not if you don't walk away from us." She returned determinedly, willing him to listen to her and not give up.

"I don't think I could, even if it was for the best." He replied and the pain and fear in his eyes was just too much to take so she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pulled him into her, running a hand into his hair and holding his head against her chest. She heard him take a faltering breath as his arms slowly wrapped around her waist but she was relieved he wasn't trying to pull away. So long as he still wanted her then they could get through it; whatever 'it' turned out to be.

"I'll be ok, we'll be ok." She reassured him, pressing a kiss into his hair and leaning her head against the top if his head as she held him. They had to be ok, nothing else was acceptable. James was not going to force them apart no matter what his plans were. She would fight with all she had to make sure of that.


	35. Chapter 33 Call To Arms

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 33 – Call To Arms<strong>

"We should go talk to Renee." Edward sighed, coming to the decision that if he couldn't keep Bella safe, she had the right to know what he'd got her daughter caught up in. As much as he didn't want to face up to it all, it wasn't just about him anymore so it was time he stopped trying to pretend everything was ok and actually dealt with it.

"I can talk to her later." Bella suggested instead since he was already upset and she didn't want to make it any worse. He didn't need to be there, she could explain it just as well once he'd gone home so he wouldn't have to relive it all.

"No, I should be there. I've put you in danger; she should be able to ask whatever questions she wants." He said as he pulled out of her arms and she could see the resolve in his eyes but it didn't convince her.

"I can answer her questions. I know how hard it is for you to talk about. You really don't need to do this."

"I do." He countered, running a hand through his hair, "I can't just keep hoping it'll all go away. Not now it involves Lucy and there's the possibility they'll pull you into it as well."

"That still doesn't mean you have to tell Renee about it. I bought you here for a break from it all. Just let me talk to her once you're home." Bella tried again only for Edward to shake his head and frown.

"No. No matter how much I'd like to just forget about it all it's time I faced up to it. It's my mess. She's going to want to know everything and I understand that. There's nothing I can do to change things so the least I can do is explain it myself." He responded stubbornly.

"Edward you really don't have to do this." Bella argued but his mind was made up and nothing she said would change it. It was his fault Bella was in danger and Renee had every right to be furious with him for it so it had to be him who explained what was going on. He wasn't going to let Bella take the blame for the situation she was in and he knew she'd try to if he wasn't there.

"Come on, we better do it now before I have chance to change my mind." He mumbled, moving to his feet and forcing Bella to take a step back as she continued to stare up at him uncertainly.

"Are you sure?" She asked one last time and when he nodded she sighed and gave in with a mutter of needing a minute to sort out her hair. Grabbing the towel from her head she let her damp hair fall down around her shoulders before going over to the mirror that hung on the wall near the door. She picked up a bottle off the top of the bookshelves there and sprayed a little on her hair before running her fingers through it.

"Let's go then." She muttered, satisfied that her hair wouldn't dry into a frizzy mess but still unsure that Edward talking to Renee was a good idea.

Opening her door she waited for Edward to reach her and then took hold of his hand as they made their way downstairs. Once there Bella looked into the living room and seeing the girls settled on the floor with dolls scattered around them and a Barbie movie playing on the TV she caught Renee's attention and nodded towards the kitchen. Renee got the idea and followed them through after checking with the girls that they'd be ok and telling them to call if they wanted anything.

"So...are you going to tell me what's going on?" She asked once they'd settled down around the table each with a mug of tea. Bella's glare didn't faze her as she concentrated on Edward who looked distinctly uncomfortable but determined at the same time. He started to speak, beginning right from the night of the party as he relayed everything that had happened since. Bella was stunned as he went through it all in detail, not missing anything out as she'd never heard him talk about it so smoothly before. Looking at him closely she could tell he'd somehow shut himself off from what he was saying, so it was almost like a story, something that had happened to someone else that he was just repeating. It was disconcerting and slightly horrifying and not just for how detached he was. What he was actually saying was just as bad. So far they'd only heard it in little parts, one at a time. Hearing it all put together was so much worse and she started to feel sick. She really didn't want to hear it anymore but as he continued to talk she reached out to take hold of his hand and gripped onto it. Whether she was offering him her support, or looking for support herself she wasn't quite sure.

When he got to the end of everything he knew Edward finally looked up and though he didn't know what he'd expected from Renee in response the blank stare he received certainly wasn't it.

"Well that's quite a rough time you've been having." She eventually said calmly and unsure what to make of the comment Edward glanced to Bella to see she was looking at Renee like she'd grown a second head. Obviously she hadn't been expecting such a calm reaction either.

"Mum...what?" Bella spluttered. Level headed was one of the last things she had ever thought Renee to be and though she'd been all set for a fight when it came to her continuing to see Edward, Renee's actual reaction had totally thrown her.

"Edward I appreciate your openness and honesty and I can see that there's very little that can be done. While I don't like the fact Bella is mixed up in this, it's obviously not your fault and I want you to know I don't blame you at all. If there is anything we can do to help, let me know. I know this probably goes without saying but I want you both to be careful. Don't go anywhere on your own and Bella I want to know where you are at all times and make sure you always have your mobile phone with you and fully charged." She stated just as calmly before she smiled a little at the shocked expression on Bella's face.

"You're not going to try and stop me from seeing him?" Bella finally asked stunned that all she had asked was for them to be careful which was hardly a deterrent as they'd both already been planning that.

"I don't see what the point in that would be. By the sounds of it he's been watching Edward for so long he's going to know exactly what you mean to him whether you're actually together or not. Since it won't make a difference to your safety now, I'd rather see the both of you happy. I've always liked Edward, I've got no problem with the two of you being together, I was just worried about you." Renee responded with a shrug, "Just keep me informed with what's going on."

"Thank you. I'm so sorry I got Bella caught up in this." Edward said quietly, feeling the need to apologise again even though both Bella and Renee had told him it wasn't his fault. He couldn't ignore the fact that if he'd kept his distance from her right at the start there wouldn't have been any reason for James to take notice of her.

"It's really not your fault. When you first met Bella you didn't even know it was a personal attack. I don't want to hear you apologising again." Renee said sternly as she stood up from the table and on her way past him, leant down to wrap an arm around his shoulders in a brief hug. "You're a good man and I hope things get better for you soon. You don't deserve all this trouble."

The rest of their afternoon went a lot better after that. Renee made everyone sandwiches for lunch and after they'd played with the girls for a little while Renee shooed Edward and Bella off to spend some time together. As going out by themselves wasn't a good idea and Edward was reluctant to leave Lucy anyway Bella just took him back up to her room and they spent the afternoon cuddled up on her bed, listening to music and talking when they felt like it. It didn't take long for Bella to notice Edward's curiosity as his gaze kept being drawn to the photos attached to the walls so she spent a good deal of time telling him about some of the more memorable ones and explaining who all the people were.

Once she'd finished recounting her memories of when Anna was first born Edward confided that he didn't really have many photos from his years with Lucy and that he'd always wished he'd been there for her first few months. He'd never seen her as a new born and it was something he'd always regretted even though he'd had no choice in the matter. He promised to show her the photos he did have the next time she was at their flat though and his spirits were lifted considerably when Bella announced she could add to their collection before pointing out a group of photos he'd missed earlier on the wall behind them. Smiling back at him from the wall was a picture of himself, wearing the plastic tiara from Anna's birthday party with Lucy sitting on his knee and he was so happy to be a part of her wall of photos that he didn't even care that he looked totally ridiculous.

"I'll get you some copies printed." She told him and instead of responding he pulled her into a heated kiss which was interrupted when Renee knocked on the door.

Bella quickly scrambled out of Edward's lap but not quite quickly enough as Renee opened the door and looked in, smiling in amusement at their flushed faces as she informed them Lucy was asking for Edward.

"Is she ok?" He asked, running a hand through his hair in attempt to flatten it back into its' usual disarray rather than the chaos Bella's hands had left it in.

"She's fine, just tired I think." Renee answered.

"Guess its time we were heading home then." Edward commented as they both got up from the bed and Renee smiled wider watching them straighten their clothes, a clear sign of recently wandering hands. "I'll text Emmett."

"You sure? I could drive you." Bella offered, glaring a little at Renee who was obviously trying to not laugh at them. Getting the message, she turned and left, telling them they'd all be in the kitchen when they were ready.

"It's safer if Emmett comes here." Edward responded reluctantly. Although he had a slightly new outlook on things and he knew he was going to have to accept more of Emmett's help it still grated on his nerves. He'd put more effort into trying but he was certain it would take more patience and forgiveness than he had in him to get things back to a friendly relationship between them.

"Hmm I guess but he might be busy, Rosalie asked me to give him her number this morning. I think he was planning to do something with it today." She commented taking Edward by surprise before he sighed and shook his head.

"Well he's the one who keeps saying he wants to help. If that's true he'll come get us." Edward replied and as he did so his phone bleeped with an incoming text which he showed to Bella stating that Emmett was on his way. "Thanks for having us over."

"No need to thank me, it was for purely selfish reasons really." She responded, tugging him closer by his t-shirt so she could kiss him again.

"So it wasn't for taking my mind off things?" He commented, his eyes sparkling as the corner of his mouth twitched up into his crooked smile, just the way she loved.

"That was just the excuse to get Emmett to let you out the flat." She replied, "I think he's all for locking you in there until they've found some way to sort everything out."

"Ah...well please feel free to kidnap me whenever you want." He said not at all joking as if that really was Emmett's plan he was going to go crazy if he didn't think of a way to get out of there. He really hoped they'd let him go back to work.

"I'll see what I can do but I do have college work to do at some point." She answered seeing the seriousness in his light hearted comment.

"That doesn't matter...I can just sit quietly while you work, I promise." He assured her with a grin making her laugh as she shoved him through the door so they could get downstairs.

"Sure you can...that won't be distracting at all..." She retaliated so he turned to look at her with a pout and big sad green eyes, the same sad eyed expression that got Lucy whatever she wanted.

"That is so not fair...you can't do that!" She complained, successfully snapping him into a grin as he laughed so she lightly slapped his shoulder as she followed him down the stairs.

"Hey...you can't hit me...I'm hurt!" He teased, clutching at his ribs and trying but failing to look sad again as he couldn't quite wipe the smile off his face.

"Yeah...but that was nowhere near your ribs and you keep telling us all you're fine. You can't have it both ways!" She countered and he laughed again before pulling her into his side and kissing her temple as they hit the bottom of the stairs. He let go of her just as quickly as he'd grabbed her, heading for the kitchen but he turned and grinned at her before entering it and she could do nothing but smile stupidly back at him.

As soon as Edward entered the kitchen Lucy dropped the biscuit she'd been eating and held her arms out. Knowing exactly what she wanted Edward went straight to her and lifted her up, letting her wrap herself around him as he kissed her head.

"Tired sweetheart?" He asked quietly and she nodded against his shoulder. "Uncle Emmett's on his way to take us home."

"Don't wanna go." She murmured making him smile as he took a seat at the table so he wasn't holding her weight as although he'd been joking with Bella, his ribs actually were hurting as the painkillers had worn off a while ago.

"Me neither baby but you need a nap and Bella has college work to do." He told her before smiling distractedly at Bella as she walked past them to an empty seat, stroking a hand down one of Lucy's bunches as she passed.

"You can come back over soon Luce." She promised and Renee nodded along although she was focussed on Anna who was watching Lucy and Edward cuddle. She'd brightened up a lot during the day, Lucy's appearance had certainly helped but now Renee was beginning to wonder if part of her bad moods was related to her being jealous of them. She'd never liked Phil being away but she'd definitely been getting worse the closer they'd been getting to Edward and Lucy. It looked like they needed some bonding time. Phil was going to have to take a holiday.

Emmett arrived not long after and though Edward tried to persuade Lucy to walk out to the car she refused to let him put her down so he had to work on controlling his expression as his ribs protested strongly. He didn't think he'd fooled Bella though as she kissed his cheek and said goodbye to Lucy before whispering something to Emmett as he stood by the door waiting for them.

"I'll see you on Monday. Lucy, look after your daddy for me." Bella called after them as they made their way to the car. Lucy waved over Edward's shoulder and once he'd got her buckled into her car seat he turned around and waved to her as well as she stood in the open doorway watching them.

* * *

><p>"Did you have a good day then?" Emmett asked as he drove hopeful that Bella had improved his mood enough for them to talk even though Edward had climbed into the back of the car alongside Lucy rather than taking the front passenger seat.<p>

"Yes." He answered bluntly but Emmett took that for progress considering he'd been ignoring him completely on the drive to Bella's house.

"What did you do?" He tried again to be met with Edward's agitated sigh.

"Talked to Renee and hung out with Bella. Lucy played with Anna." He answered shortly and though Emmett wanted to ask what he'd talked to Renee about he guessed it would be better to wait until they were home and Lucy was in bed. Edward may have been answering but he didn't sound happy to be talking and he really didn't want to push it in the confines of the car.

Edward persuaded Lucy to take a nap once they got in as although it wasn't something she usually needed, her excitement in the morning had obviously worn her out and he didn't want to have a grumpy, tired Lucy for the rest of the night. Unfortunately that meant he was left on his own with Emmett who he could just tell was itching to ask a million questions. He still wasn't sure how he felt about Emmett and really didn't want to talk to him yet but sinking down into the sofa he was already annoyed by Emmett's fidgeting.

"What?" He snapped, startling Emmett and making him stare at him wide eyed rather than saying anything which only further irritated Edward. "You want to say something, so just say it."

"What did you talk to Renee about?" Emmett blurted out the first thing that came to mind, still a little shocked by Edward's abruptness and when Edward groaned and grabbed at his hair he really wished his mind could act before his mouth for once and that he'd asked something a little less intrusive to start with.

"She wanted to know what was going on. What I'd got Bella caught up in so I told her." He muttered letting his hand fall from his hair as he leant back into the sofa and closed his eyes. It may have done him good getting it out like that but he really wasn't up for repeating it all again to Emmett, especially as he already knew it all anyway. Still, with his new resolution to face things he was resigned to answering Emmett's questions. He just hoped he'd let him keep the answers brief and leave him in peace for the rest of the day.

"How much of it did you tell her?" Emmett asked warily seeing from Edward's expression and posture that something had changed while he was at Bella's to make him more open but he could also tell they were in a very fragile truce and it wouldn't take much to bring Edward's anger back full force.

"Everything."

"Everything? " Emmett queried and when Edward nodded it brought a wave of hurt over him as he realised that Edward seemed so determined to shut him out yet he'd happily talk to someone he didn't even really know. They'd had to fight for every little bit of information they'd got out of him yet all she'd had to do was ask. It should not have been like that. "I don't get it, why can you talk to her about it so easily but not me?"

"She needed to know. Bella's her daughter and I got her into this whole mess so explaining it all was the least I could do and it wasn't easy so I'd rather not go over it all again right now." Edward answered tersely finding it hard to keep his temper with Emmett asking stupid questions.

"We needed to know too! How do you expect us to keep you safe when you don't talk to us." Emmett asked frustrated and at a loss as to what to do with his brother.

"That's the thing...I don't _expect_ you to keep me safe. Nothing is going to stop James, doesn't matter what you think you know."

"You don't know that!" Emmett countered beginning to have trouble controlling his anger with Edward showing he had already given up before they'd even tried.

"Oh I do. All that can be done is to try and keep other people out of it so if that means letting you stay here for Lucy and telling Renee so they can all look out for Bella then I'll do that." He responded with a strange sense of calmness that only riled Emmett up further.

"So you'll make the effort to keep other people safe yet when it comes to yourself you won't even try?" He asked totally flabbergasted as it became apparent just how little Edward actually cared for himself. It was starting to sound like he didn't think he was worth caring about, that James could do what he liked to him and it wouldn't matter.

"Of course I'll try, which is why I want to go back to work by the way but I'm not fooling myself into believing a little talking will solve everything." Edward shot back.

"How is going back to work going to help? Bella told me about your coughing fit this morning which reminds me you still need to take your painkillers by the way. If you go back while you're still ill you won't need to wait for James to put you back in hospital, you'll put yourself there."

"That was a one off, I've been feeling a lot better and Garrett would be there at work, and the rest of the staff, surely that's safer than sitting in here on my own every day." Edward argued really wishing Emmett would listen to him for once rather than just writing of the idea straight away. He'd thought about it a lot on the way home from Bella's and he was sure it was the best place for him.

"And how are you going to get there? There is no way you're walking around by yourself. They've already attacked you on your way to work once." Emmett pointed out but Edward had no intention of walking, he knew that would be asking for trouble and whether Emmett believed it or not he really didn't want to be an easy target. Knowing there was nothing that could be done to stop James did not mean he was just going to roll over and let him do what he liked.

"Well Esme's giving us a lift every morning to Lucy's school and picking her up each night. Garrett's is on her way and my shifts are when Lucy's in school so I was going to ask if she could drop me off there. It'd be easier for her than needing to drive me back here in the mornings." He answered quickly, stunning Emmett once more since he was actually thinking of asking for help and willing to accept it for once. Put like that it didn't even sound like that much of a bad idea and it was encouraging to finally see a sign of Edward trying to look out for himself for a change.

"Oh, I guess that make sense then but you need to let Carlisle check you over and talk to Garrett first." He commented unable to think of any other reasons to disagree with him. It did actually make sense the more he thought about it and he knew Garrett would keep an eye on him for them. In a lot of ways it would actually be better than him staying home so long as he didn't overdo it and someone drove him to and from the shop. Between them all they ought to be able to make it work.

"I'll call him later." Edward easily agreed to Emmett's condition as he'd already expected he'd have to get the ok from Carlisle and he was happy that Emmett was going to go along with it. He really hadn't wanted to have to fight everyone over it but he couldn't have stood spending another week cooped up in the flat. Aside from going crazy from boredom he was certain he wouldn't have fared too well from the paranoia by the end of the week either. Working was definitely the better option.

"Good. So how did Renee react to everything?" Emmett asked, going back to their original conversation since there was nothing else to be said about him going back to work until they'd spoken to Carlisle.

"Surprisingly well." Edward answered still finding it strange that she'd taken it so calmly. He certainly hadn't been able to do the same when Emmett had put Lucy in danger.

"How so?" Emmett asked since he was doing well at getting answers for once and his curiosity was peaked.

"She wants Bella to be careful, and to be kept informed and that was about all she said."

"I guess that's good then." Emmett commented a little surprised that was all she'd had to say before they lapsed into an awkward silence that lasted until Lucy sleepily stumbled into the room an hour later announcing she was hungry.

When Edward went to bed that night the first thing he saw when he entered his room was the t-shirt he'd leant Bella neatly folded up on his bed. It put a smile on his face after the tense, awkward evening spent with Emmett after Lucy had gone to bed. Their brief truce before her nap hadn't lasted as although Edward wasn't quite as hostile, seeing Emmett playing with Lucy and chatting to her happily just reminded him that he'd put her in danger so by the time Lucy had fallen asleep any lingering ideas of being pleasant towards him had drifted.

Picking up the t-shirt he lifted it up to his face and inhaled deeply, instantly being swamped with the unique calming scent of Bella. He couldn't even identify what it was, whether it was a fragrance she wore, just her natural scent or a combination of the two but whatever it was he loved it. After swapping it for the t-shirt he had been wearing and pulling off his jeans, he climbed into bed on the side Bella had slept in the night before and nuzzled into the pillow there, finding an unexpected peaceful sleep almost instantly when being cocooned in her scent allowed his mind to go straight back to the night before, giving him dreams of sleeping with her in his arms.

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><p>For the first time in the last few weeks Edward was reluctant to wake up from his dreams. When he awoke to the grumble of the heating turning on and the slam of the bathroom door suggesting Emmett was up it was with a groan that he opened his eyes. On a night when his nightmares should have been more vivid than ever after the detailed description of everything that had happened to him he had given Renee Bella's magic ability to make his concerns vanish had come into play and he'd dreamed of her all night instead.<p>

The dreams had started innocently enough, replaying the way they'd fallen asleep together but they'd soon turned into a type of dream he'd never had before as it deviated from what had really happened and developed into what he'd wished would have happened and they'd woken up wrapped in each other arms. Their good morning kiss had turned heated and with his memories all too willing to provide fuel for his dreams they'd seemed so real. He'd been able to feel the way she'd felt settled against him as if she'd been there and in his dreams neither of them had felt the need to pull back.

Intoxicated by her, his inhibitions seemed destroyed as their tongues had fought for dominance and their wandering hands grew in boldness. Where Bella's hands had started out in his hair, just as they usually did, they had soon fallen to tickle beneath his t-shirt exactly as they had in reality only when she'd hit his ribs instead of pulling away they'd continued their path to explore his chest. He'd felt more alive than ever before, like everywhere their skin touched, she pulsed electricity through him.

Unable to stand the intensity of it and in search of a way to relieve it, he'd broken away from her mouth to attack her neck which just made it worse when she moaned and leaned her head to the side to give him more access before her hands had fallen from his chest to grab hold of the bottom of his t-shirt and tug it up forcing him to stop his attention on her neck as she brought it over his head. He'd sat stunned and incapacitated as she'd then quickly pulled her own t-shirt off revealing her to be bare underneath it. His imagination made her appear as perfect, smooth, porcelain skin although he was sure it wouldn't be anywhere close to the real perfection that hid beneath her clothing.

In his dream he'd been just as inept as he thought he would be as she'd had to lift his hands and press them against her breasts to break him from just staring at her in wonder. With whispered words of encouragement she'd squeezed her hands around his to tighten his grip before letting go and returning her hands to his hair as she'd pulled him into a kiss more ferocious than any they'd shared before. That had distracted him from his stunned thoughts as he'd fallen even further under her spell and his hands had started to move on their own, exploring the unbelievably soft skin underneath them and learning where and how to touch as Bella moaned and arched into his hands before starting to move her hips against his. His body had reacted accordingly and he had matched her movements, pushing himself against her before he couldn't take much more of it and he'd stopped his hands' explorations so he could crush her against him in an unstoppable urge to be closer.

It was as Bella had snaked a hand down from his hair and in between them, pressing against his erection that he'd woken and as he thought about it now, he realised it wasn't the heating turning on, or Emmett closing a door too loudly that had woken him.

Just thinking about the dream had caused his body to react and as he stared down at himself in disgust it was apparent that even in his dream he hadn't been able to ignore the feelings that had been imprinted on him from his encounter with Jessica. His body may have been excited and craving more but the feel of it evoked the notion that it was wrong, dirty, unwanted. Even the dream was tainted now and he felt disgusting to have been thinking of Bella like that. Deep down he knew that was ridiculous, that it was normal for guys his age to have dreams like that, that it was normal to want to act out the dream and that Bella probably wouldn't even object but right then that didn't seem to make a difference. It still felt all wrong to him. He hoped in time it would change but he knew it would be a while yet before he'd be able to let Bella touch him that way.

Shaking his head to try and dispel those thoughts and hang on to the happier feelings he'd initially woken up with he decided to get out of bed. At least the fact he was even having dreams like that and was able to think about them while awake suggested he was making progress. Things had been going really well with Bella so he tried to focus on that rather than what was still to be worked on. It was all part of the positive way of thinking Bella had tried to install in him and it seemed to be working as he managed to maintain a smile throughout the morning even when Emmett started pestering him to find out what was making him so happy.

They spent the morning finishing up the homework Lucy had from Friday then Carlisle and Esme visited in the afternoon. After checking Edward over Carlisle agreed that going back to work could be a good idea and promised to ring Garrett and let him know which pleased Edward. Emmett used the rest of the afternoon trying to persuade Edward to let him get the internet installed in the flat since he was in such a good mood he wasn't even glaring at him. It took a while but he eventually gave in when Emmett promised to make sure they weren't bound to a contract so it could be cancelled at any time and assured him that since it was purely for his benefit, he'd be paying for everything it involved. That turned out to work in Edward's favour when Emmett spent the rest of the day trying to sort it out as it kept him from asking Edward any more questions.

When Bella called just before Edward got in to bed she was pleasantly surprised to find he was in a good mood when he happily informed her he was allowed to go back to work. He wasn't sure when his first shift would be but he was hopeful it would be Tuesday. Carlisle had promised to call Garrett as soon as they got home so he was really hopeful Garrett would ring him the following day. Laughing at his excitement she asked how the rest of his day had been and they spent over an hour just chatting before they both started yawning and Bella forced them to hang up with the promise of seeing him the next day.

* * *

><p>Standing at the school gates Edward was bubbling with excitement which had rubbed off on Lucy and was amusing Bella as they waited for the bell to ring. Garrett had phoned just before they'd left the flat to say that he would be visiting once they got back as he had some good news for him. That combined with the fact Esme had asked Bella if she'd be able to pick Lucy up that afternoon as she'd got an unexpected work meeting that might run late she could do with attending and Bella had agreed, saying she and Anna could even stay for an hour or so had resulted in a very giddy Edward.<p>

He'd been chasing Lucy around threatening to tickle her when Bella and Anna had arrived at the gates and then Lucy had kissed his cheek and dragged Anna into the playground. They were now watching the children playing the game of tag Lucy had managed to rope her class into and Bella was left feeling sorry for their teacher as her hyperactivity seemed to be rubbing off on a lot of the other children. She didn't dwell on it for long though as Edward wrapped his arms around her waist and tugged her back into his chest before resting his chin on her shoulder.

"I feel sorry for their teacher. You've created a monster." Bella commented as they continued to watch the children play.

"Nah, she'll be good as gold as soon as they go in." Edward responded knowing that just the running around would be helping Lucy calm down and she was always well behaved in class.

"She might be, not sure about the rest of them." Bella laughed before turning around in his arms to look up at him. "It's good seeing you look this happy though."

"It's good to feel it too. I know there's still a lot going on that needs sorted out but it feels like things are finally getting back on track."

"Well I'm glad; you're doing so well with everything." Bella praised as she was happy to see he was managing to concentrate on the good things rather than dwelling on James and the problems he caused.

"That's mostly thanks to you, you know." He commented with his uneven smile. She shook her head at that before reaching up on to her toes to kiss him quickly as the school bell rang behind them.

"I better head off. I need to drive Poppy home before Jasper picks me up for college." She said as they reluctantly broke apart.

"Renee's making you stick to the whole not going anywhere on your own thing then?" Edward asked a little awkwardly with the reminder of the danger they were in bringing his mood down although he was glad to hear she was being careful.

"Yup, unless I'm driving she was serious about it. I don't trust Poppy in the college parking so its lucky Jasper doesn't mind picking me up." She responded with a small smile in an attempt to take away the slightly haunted look that had come across Edward's eyes.

"Good, he'll keep you safe." Edward replied, dropping a kiss onto her forehead before unwrapping his arms from around her. Bella just rolled her eyes feeling like everyone was being a little paranoid since James hadn't actually threatened her yet but happy to humour them anyway.

"I'm sure he will. Keep yourself safe and I'll see you tonight." She said before quickly kissing him once more and running over to where she'd parked Poppy.

Edward watched her until she was safely inside the car. He'd seen no sign of anyone suspicious but the ever present feeling that someone was watching him was still there even if he was doing better at ignoring it than normal. Bella drove away unhindered though so he turned and headed to where Esme was waiting in her car for him.

She seemed a little agitated as she started the car up which made Edward wonder what her meeting at work was about as she'd been fine until she'd mentioned it. As soon as Bella had agreed to pick Lucy up she'd gone back to the car and pulled her phone out. Whatever it was seemed to be stressful and he hoped she'd get it sorted out that afternoon. He didn't like seeing Esme anxious like that.

After walking him up to his flat and reminding him to lock the door behind her and make sure he knew who was behind it if anyone knocked before opening it Esme left in a hurry. Left to his own devices Edward made himself a cup of coffee and turned the TV on as he waited impatiently for Garrett to arrive. Excited and slightly anxious he was curious as to what Garrett wanted to talk to him about. He'd assured him it was good news, but if it had just been to tell him when his shifts were he could have done that over the phone. Luckily he didn't have to wait long as it was barely an hour before someone knocked on the door.

Edward shot off the sofa and almost ran to the door before coming to a halt and eying it a little suspiciously as he called out, asking who was there. Hearing Garrett's familiar voice answer he hurried to unlock the door and pulled it open.

"It's good to see you looking so well." Garrett greeted him as he locked up again. The last time he'd seen Edward was in the hospital and he looked like a different man now. The bruises were gone, his figure filled out a little and his eyes were bright and happy. "I'm sorry I haven't visited before now. I've been busy with the shop and I figured you'd probably have enough people fussing over you with Emmett, Carlisle and Esme."

"You're right there, I can't wait to get back to work for some peace." He answered cheerfully as he led Garrett through to the living room. "Would you like a coffee or anything?"

"A coffee would be good thanks." Garrett responded but instead of staying in the living room like Edward had intended, he followed him into the kitchen. Looking around he could see the influence of other people in the flat now. From what he could see as Edward made the drinks the cupboards and fridge were a lot better stocked than when he'd last been there. He was glad to see they'd all been taking good care of him.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?" Edward asked the moment they were settled in the living room with their coffee. Garrett smiled at his eagerness and hoped what he had to say would go down well and not be met with stubborn pride.

"Well while you've been off Adam handed in his notice so I was wondering how you'd feel about a promotion." He told him and watched as Edward just stared at him, obviously taken by surprise. Adam had been his assistant manager and had been with the shop since just before Edward had started there. He was well liked and had done a good job but Garrett hadn't tried to talk him out of leaving them as he'd known exactly what he wanted to do with the opportunity it opened up. He'd wanted to give Edward a pay rise anyway but with his stubbornness he wouldn't have accepted it without a good reason so now Garrett had one. The shop had also always been a family run business and although they were only distantly related, Carlisle had always been more like a brother than a cousin even if they had lived on different continents for most of their lives and having known Edward for so long, and having always been fond of him he figured that meant he could adopt him as a nephew. He was hoping Edward would accept the offer and he'd be able to train him to eventually run the shop although he knew he'd have to ease him into that one. He was also positive that out of all their current staff Edward would be the best suited to being assistant manager. He might not have had the qualifications that some of them did but he was smart and by far the most enthusiastic about the job and now he'd got support around him that could help with Lucy the extra hours it might require wouldn't be a problem like they would have been before.

"Why me?" Edward eventually managed to ask and Garrett could see he'd gone straight to the conclusion that he'd hoped he wouldn't.

"Because I think out of everyone currently at the shop you'd be the best one for the job. You've been there the longest and I know you'd be great at it." He answered carefully and hoped the frown on Edward's face wasn't a sign he was going to turn him down.

"This isn't just out of pity is it?" Edward asked warily. It was a great opportunity but there was no way he could accept it if that was the reason behind the offer.

"Definitely not. I really think you're the best one for the job." Garrett repeated and watched Edward mull it over for a while as he came up with his next question.

"You're sure I could do it?" He asked unsurely.

"Yes, I know you can. I'll be training you, so it's not like you're expected to just know exactly what to do straight away." Garrett assured him but he still didn't look any happier.

"Wouldn't it be more hours than what I do now?"

"Probably yeah but I'll give you plenty of notice when I need you in longer or on the odd weekend. I didn't think that would be much of a problem now with Esme and Carlisle around, I know they love looking after her. More hours and a pay rise...that's got to be good right?" He answered trying to tempt him into saying yes as he was still looking doubtful making Garrett sure he was going to have a fight on his hands to convince him. "Please say you'll accept this, I really need the help and I want it to be you. If you don't, I'll have to advertise for someone and you know how much I hate having to interview people."

"Guess I can't make you do that." Edward answered, a small smile playing at his lips as he remembered all the moaning Garrett had done the last time he'd had to hire new staff. If Garrett was sure he could do it then he could at least give it a go, he was right about the extra money being good.

"You'll take the job?" Garrett asked, surprised he'd given in so quickly but glad that he had as he wasn't quite sure how else he could have argued his point.

"Yes, if you're sure I can do it." Edward confirmed, liking the idea of it a little more each minute.

"I am. You'll be great. Now Carlisle told me you're fit to work again so how does starting back tomorrow sound?" Garrett asked quickly before Edward could try changing his mind.

"That would be great, I'm sick of being stuck in here all day." Edward responded as now the idea was beginning to sink in he really wanted to get started with it. It would be good getting to learn something new again.

"Ok then, we'll start off with your usual shifts and see how we go. We can do the training whenever it's quiet." Garrett suggested as Carlisle had already warned him to make sure Edward took it easy for the first week or so.

"Ok. Thank you for this." Edward said sincerely. A promotion hadn't been what he had expected their talk to be about but it was nice to hear Garrett had enough faith in him to give him the extra responsibilities and he was very grateful for it.

"You're more than welcome. Now that is all sorted I think that's enough about work. Tell me how you've been doing. I hear there's a girlfriend around now." Garrett said enthusiastically, settling back into his seat and wanting to hear all about the changes in Edward's life. He'd heard bits and pieces through Esme and Carlisle but he was curious to hear it from Edward's point of view. He suspected it would be quite different to the way they all described it.

Edward got them both another mug of coffee before he sat down again and told Garrett what he wanted to know. It was nice to have company that wasn't Emmett so he told him about everything that had happened since he'd come home from hospital although he concentrated more on the good things than the bad and he was just describing how brilliant Bella was when Garrett's phone rang. Apologising for the interruption, Garrett quickly found his phone in his pocket intending to cancel the call but a glance at the screen told him he had to take it.

Edward watched Garrett's expression go from happy and relaxed to stressed in seconds and had a bad feeling about who was on the phone. It certainly couldn't have been good news which Garrett confirmed as soon as he ended the call.

"I'm sorry, I have to go. That was Ben. Something's just flown through the shop window. He thinks it was just a piece of debris off the road that a bus kicked up but I need to go in and get it sorted." Garrett told him as soon as he'd put his phone away. "You'll be ok here on your own right?"

After Edward promised that he would be fine and encouraged Garrett to go get the shop sorted he showed him out before deciding to make himself some lunch. Stuck with just the TV for company once more, he flicked through the channels before he found a half decent cookery show and watched that for a while. Once it finished there didn't seem to be anything on other than terrible day time soaps so he turned it off. He tried putting some music on to break up the silence in the flat but that reminded him of being at Bella's house and it just made him restless as he couldn't wait for Bella to bring Lucy home so he could tell her about the promotion. They weren't due for another couple of hours though so since sitting still wasn't going to help he decided to do the mornings washing up in the hope that keeping busy would make the time go faster.

He was halfway through the dishes when he heard the rattle of keys in his front door. With his hands buried in soapy water and knowing that Emmett was the only other person with a set of keys to his flat he wasn't too concerned with going to meet him at the door so he continued with what he was doing. The front door slammed shut and he waited a couple of minutes but when he didn't hear anything else over the music that was still playing he wondered what Emmett was up to. He shouldn't have even been home until dinner time and the lack of any kind of greeting seemed odd. Assuming he was just there since he hadn't wanted to leave Edward on his own for long he called out, figuring he ought to let him know where he was.

"You didn't have to come home early you know. I'm sure I would have been fine on my own for a couple of hours."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that." A voice, that certainly wasn't Emmett's, answered from right behind him and before he even had chance to turn around and see who was in his kitchen his left arm was grabbed and forced behind his back while a damp, sweet smelling cloth was clamped over his mouth and nose. He struggled, but his weak shoulder protested the angle his arm was at limiting his movement and when he tried to use his free arm to prise away the hand holding the cloth in place his soapy wet fingers couldn't break the strong grip that was being used.

All his struggling achieved was forcing him to breath in the toxic fumes faster and as he started to get light headed he knew it was over. As the darkness claimed him he hoped Lucy and Bella were safe.

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><p><em>AN - Once again thank you to everyone who reviewed, favourited or added to alerts. I love spending my Saturday nights and Sundays watching my email for the notifications and I really appreciate everyone who takes the time to read this.<em>

_I wasn't entirely sure about this chapter so I hope it's ok.  
><em>


	36. Chapter 34 Insanity Rules

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 34 – Insanity Rules<strong>

It was too easy.

Months of watching, waiting, planning and in one morning it had all paid off. They'd all spent so long trying to work out why he was doing what he was that they'd entirely missed _what_ he was doing.

When the morning news had announced a large pile up on the motorway he'd known it was time. The hospital would be in chaos and Carlisle would be called in and run off his feet, nicely out of the way and hard to contact. Then Esme had run off on some stupid errand that wouldn't even get her anywhere and only succeeded in placing her miles away from where she was really needed and with both of them out of the way the rest had been easy to dispose of. Garrett had thrown a spanner in the works for a moment but that had been easily fixed with some quick thinking from Victoria and Riley.

Now James waited as Edward struggled pointlessly, only aiding him in his plans. He could already feel the fight draining out of him and when he finally fell still and slumped against the sink he let go of his hold, letting Edward fall to the ground with a satisfying thump. Looking down at where he was now sprawled on his own kitchen floor he smirked as he noticed he'd most likely banged his head off the units as he'd landed.

"Idiot." James muttered as he stepped away, landing a kick to the ribs he already knew were damaged. When there was no response he left him and wandered back through to the living room where he'd dropped his bag. Picking it up he looked through it to find what he needed. Pulling out a zip lock bag from the front pocket he put the soaked cloth into it before sealing it up and packing it back into the bag. That safely out of the way, he took the bag back into the kitchen with him, dropping it onto the table before pulling several lengths of rough rope out. Laying those neatly onto the table he smiled at them before turning back to Edward. After kicking him again to make sure there was still no response he crouched down to pick him up. James wasn't overly muscled like Emmett but Edward was still a weak excuse for a man so he had no trouble moving him onto one of his kitchen chairs. His head flopped limply onto his chest as James yanked his arms behind his back, carefully tying his wrists together with the first length of rope before he knelt and tied his legs to those of the chair, effectively immobilising him.

Now all he had to do was wait for the phone calls that would tell him it was safe to proceed. He wanted to take his time, really draw things out so he wanted no unexpected interruptions. Pulling out a chair he took his leather jacket off and hung it over the back of the chair before slouching into it and kicking his feet up to rest on another chair, making himself at home.

He knew exactly how he was going to wake Edward when the time came and a large, cruel smile lit his face as he thought about it.

He was really going to enjoy this.

* * *

><p>Esme was tense as she drove. She knew she was going against Carlisle's wishes but seeing Edward so happy that morning had made her unable to stand the thought of anything destroying that and it had made up her mind. After ringing Emmett at work to confirm Edward Senior was there for the day and making sure Bella could pick Lucy up she was on her way.<p>

Now, trying to follow the directions Emmett had given her, the nerves and anger were making it difficult to stay focussed. She knew the reception she'd receive would not be warm and she would have rather had Carlisle there for back-up but she didn't want to wait for a day when he'd be free. The sooner they got some answers, the sooner they might be able to get to the bottom of everything and that was the most important thing right then. She just wasn't sure how she was going to manage to have a proper conversation to find out what they needed without it turning into a pointless yelling match as the closer she got, the angrier she became as she thought about what they'd done to Edward.

Coming to a stop outside the large house Emmett had given her the address to she took a moment to try and calm herself before stepping out of the car and locking it up. Striding confidently towards the front door she stopped on the porch and rang the bell. It didn't take long before she heard footsteps inside and then the door was pulled open.

"Hello Elizabeth. I think it's time we talked."

* * *

><p>Emmett stared at his computer with horror. His dad had handed him a large mound of files first thing that morning with instructions to have them all typed up before he went home. It was over a day's worth of work and he was already in a hurry to get home so he'd worked through his morning break and most of his lunch hour and having just relaxed a little thinking he was making good headway his computer had frozen. He wasn't even sure if it had saved everything he'd done so far or not. He really wasn't cut out for office work.<p>

Admitting defeat, he rang the IT support department to try and get someone to come up and fix it. He was told someone would be with him shortly so he sat back and looked at the files he still had to type up. He hoped they could get his computer up and running fast or he was going to be extremely late home as he knew his dad would accept no excuses as to why the work wasn't done.

A tall dark haired man soon approached his desk and introduced himself as Laurent from IT support. Relieved he'd arrived so quickly, Emmett jumped up out of the way and hurriedly explained what had happened while Laurent sat down in his vacated chair and clicked the mouse a few times before typing something into the keyboard and grimacing.

"Looks like you've got a virus on here. You've not been downloading anything have you?" He asked, looking up at Emmett with an almost sleazy smile that set him on edge before he shook the feeling away.

"No, that's against company policy, my dad would kill me." He responded truthfully, beginning to fear just what would happen if Laurent passed on his suspicions.

"Well either way, this is going to take a while to fix, if it's what I think it is it'll take at least the rest of the afternoon." Laurent cheerfully informed him.

"What? I need it faster than that!" Emmett exclaimed, horrified at what he was hearing. He'd be stuck there all night if that was the case and he really needed to get home to Edward and Lucy.

"Sorry, it takes as long as it takes." Laurent responded with an unapologetic shrug so Emmett sighed as he tried to think what he could do.

"I need to make a phone call." He muttered distractedly, thinking he should at least let Edward know he was going to be really late. A quick search of his pockets didn't turn up his mobile though so he searched his desk drawers, coming up empty there too.

"Lost something?" Laurent asked as he watched him getting frustrated and Emmett didn't like the amused tone to his voice.

"Yes, my phone. I might have left it in my car I guess." He muttered. He knew he'd had it that morning as Esme had called him on it. It had to be around somewhere.

Leaving Laurent to it, he took a quick trip down to the office parking and searched his car only to find no mobile phone. Growling in frustration he stormed back into the office and searched his desk again but there was still no sign of it. Giving up he stared at his office phone for a minute but he knew he couldn't use that, all phone calls made from the offices were recorded and he just couldn't risk his dad finding out who he was staying with.

His day was turning out to be a real great one but at least hunting for his phone would give him something to do while he waited for his computer to be fixed.

* * *

><p>James smiled as he ended the call on his phone. His plan was working perfectly. The office moron was blissfully unaware his computer had been tampered with and his phone stolen and was currently wasting his time scouring the office for it and ever the coward he was, he seemed intent on sticking in the office until the menial task his father had given him for the day was complete.<p>

As he'd thought before, it was just all too easy.

Riley had already phoned to say his part of the plan was underway. Bella wouldn't be driving anywhere and Victoria was in place to be at the school gates on time. Everything was all set and as soon as Edward started to stir he could get started.

Wanting to make sure he was prepared, James reached for his bag again and pulled out a full, clear plastic water bottle. Setting it on the table he stared at it for a minute thinking it was fortunate Edward was so susceptible. He hadn't been a hundred percent sure the first time they'd used it, but when no one had chased them down once they'd left he knew it must have worked. If only he'd known how irresponsible his little sister had been, it would have all worked perfectly and that would have been the end of the whole thing.

Sighing, he lifted his gaze away from the bottle to stare at Edward again. He still couldn't see what the attraction was. He was weak, a pathetic push over and restricted by an uptight upbringing. Sure, he might have been a good looking teenager at the time, but he'd been so quiet and studious that he'd never understood why the girls all wanted him. The fact he'd not even shown his sister the smallest bit of attention had been an insult although he thought he'd taught him that lesson. He hadn't expected it to all backfire the way it had but now there was nothing he could do about that. All he could do was get the vengeance his sister deserved.

James slid silently to his feet when he heard Edward's breathing catch slightly, feeling the anticipation build now he was starting to come round. Grabbing the bottle of water he twisted the lid off and moved behind Edward so he could wake him fully while causing most amount of pain possible to make his other task more straightforward.

Taking hold of his left arm he lifted it up as much as he could with it still being tied to his right before leaning his full weight against it and pushing it forward. He heard the pop just before Edward cried out in pain and thrashed his head back enabling James to quickly switch his grip so he was now holding his head in place and could force the open bottle into his mouth.

He watched with satisfaction as Edward choked on the slightly salty tasting liquid that was being forced down his throat and when he tried to move his head away James was unrelenting with his grip giving Edward no options other than choking or swallowing. When as much of the liquid was down his throat as possible James took the bottle away and pushed Edward's head forward roughly as he let go.

Moving back around the table he reclaimed his previous seat and studied Edward. He arm was hanging limply at a slightly odd angle even though it was still tied behind his back, his eyes were red and watering, whether from the pain, the choking or both James didn't care and he looked dazed and disorientated until his eyes finally settled on James who smiled.

"Nice of you to join me again." He commented, going for pleasant as if he hadn't just knocked Edward out, tied him to a chair and dislocated his shoulder again. Edward didn't say anything at first and James just watched him as he gazed at the now empty water bottle sitting on the table.

"What was in that?" He asked hoarsely, making James smile grow as he showed he knew the water had been tampered with. It was going to make things so much more fun.

"Oh I think you already know the answer to that but let's just say it's my insurance policy." He answered watching avidly as Edward gritted his teeth against the pain James was sure was radiating from his shoulder.

"Why are you doing this?" Edward eventually asked after seeming to get a handle on the pain and James tutted at the repetitiveness of the question. He was meant to be intelligent so he should have had a little clue by now yet it was still the same thing every time.

"Surely Emmett's told you who I am by now?" He asked instead of answering, noting that Edward's breathing was getting a little shallow giving away that he was in more pain than he was trying to let on. He'd be thanking him for the drugs soon as he knew they'd take the edge off things a little when they kicked in. It was a downside of using them really, but on the slim chance something went wrong he needed to make sure Edward's memories wouldn't be clear. He'd just have to work a little harder at causing the pain but he'd enjoy that.

"Yes but that doesn't explain why you're doing this." Edward answered stubbornly while trying to shuffle in his chair a little, obviously trying to find a way out of the ropes.

"I wouldn't try to get free, it's pointless and you'll just make that arm worse." James commented happily, safe in the knowledge Edward was secure and not at all bothered if he did hurt himself more. "And I think we'll wait till Riley gets here to really get into things, he's going to have something to show you and he doesn't want to miss the main event. Mind you, that doesn't mean we can't have a little fun first."

"Did Emmett tell you we went to school together?" James asked after a moment of silence, deciding they may as well get started with the back story as it wouldn't take long for Riley to arrive and he wanted Edward to fully understand what was going on. When Edward nodded, something he seemed to regret if the way his sight unfocussed was anything to go by, James continued, "Good, bet he didn't tell you we were in school together since primary though. I always hated him, mostly it was on principle what with him being the rich golden boy and all but I hated _him_ as well. He was always so sure of himself. Seemed to think he was just entitled to anything he wanted whether it was a particular toy or friends. He always looked down his nose at me. Coming from a broken family with only enough money to survive day to day he thought I was scum. When we were little he always took any opportunity he could to make fun of me, and there were plenty of those considering I was a bit of a loner then. Then we hit secondary school and we didn't have a lot to do with each other anymore with so many more people to get lost in.

I know the reputation I had, and what people thought of me but I did what I had to back then. If we needed money, I got it. Our mum was useless, mental illness you know? In fact you ought to get Lucy checked out for that...runs in the family apparently. Anyway, when she wasn't so drugged up she barely knew what was going on, she was stuck with debilitating anxiety. Everything was left to me, and I handled it. It was hard and I didn't particularly enjoy it back then but it was necessary and I learnt how to survive and take care of my little sister and brother.

Emmett was of no significance to me anymore since I had no time to waste on petty childhood hatred even if he was one of the main culprits when it came to the rumours about me but then we met Victoria. It was one of the few times I turned up for school as an out of school careers day had actually sounded like it might be useful and it ended up being so much more. Victoria was there, she was so vibrant in comparison to anyone I'd ever seen and I was instantly drawn to her yet Emmett had also noticed her and before I could even attempt to talk to her he had sucked her in. She didn't even spare me a glance on that first day, already caught on his charms but I watched them. He didn't appreciate her, not the way he should have. She was wild and he seemed to just want her for the challenge. It made me so angry to see them together, to know he didn't really care for her when I knew she would have meant everything to me. I learnt more about her just watching her from a distance than he ever did and I wanted so badly to tell her how I felt but I knew I couldn't, not with Emmett around so I continued to just watch them. Then when she caught him cheating on her at a party it broke her heart and I was there to pick up the pieces. I couldn't stand seeing her hurt though so I had decided he needed to pay for what he'd done even if it had resulted in me getting the girl."

"You're doing this because of Emmett?" Edward interrupted apparently too upset and outraged to remain quiet so James levelled him with a cold stare, making it perfectly clear this wasn't a two sided conversation. Rising to his feet he moved towards Edward again, liking the way it made him pull against his ties which just aggravated his shoulder more. Pain was a good look on him.

"No, now if you don't interrupt me again I'll continue. So, I was already trying to work out how to get back at Emmett when Jessica came home from school crying. It took a while to get it out of her, but eventually she told me about the crush she had on you and how Tanya had been bragging to everyone about sleeping with you when you didn't even notice her. To be honest I didn't see why it was such a big deal, you really weren't anything special but she was my little sister and she was upset. You can see where this is going right?" He taunted as he circled Edward, keeping him on edge as he knew he was waiting for the next strike to come but he would just have to continue to wait as the anticipation was going to make it so much better and James wasn't ready to end things yet.

"I don't even know who Tanya is and I certainly didn't sleep with her...or anyone else!" Edward responded angrily and James didn't like the tone he was taking so he stopped circling his chair to roughly yank his head back using his hair, holding it an awkward angle where the back of the chair would be digging uncomfortably into his neck.

"Getting angry? How cute. I don't care what you've got to say for yourself and I certainly don't want to hear your pitiful lies. Everyone in that school knew who Tanya was, hell even I did and I was barely ever in school! Tall, model like strawberry blonde...ring any bells now? Not that it matters." James sneered before his attention was caught by the sound of keys in the door. He could see the hopeful look in Edward's eyes and couldn't help but chuckle. "It's just Riley, no one is going to come to your rescue today."

"How do you even have keys to my flat?" Edward spat which James just found amusing. So much anger yet no way for him to put it to use. That had to be frustrating.

"Oh dear, you really have been clueless haven't you? Did you not wonder how someone got into your locked flat, messed it up then left and locked up after themselves? That night you spent in the alley? I knocked you out, much like I did today, Riley took your keys, made a copy then came back here."

"Why would you do that? There was nothing here but Lucy and it terrified her. She's your niece...doesn't that mean anything to you?" He barrelled on apparently unable to hold his tongue but James wasn't too concerned as it was actually just amusing. He'd always been such a push over that it was interesting to see him actually put up a fight, even if it was ridiculously weak.

"Ah we had to check you were who I thought. They found her birth certificate to make sure. Wouldn't want to screw up some innocent, misfortunate person's life would we? As for Lucy, you shouldn't have left her on her own." James answered easily as Riley appeared in the door way. Dropping his grip on Edward's hair he reached out a hand to take the greasy looking cylindrical chunk of plastic Riley was offering. "No trouble getting this?"

"No, no one was around and it was easy to remove." Riley answered as his gaze drifted from James over to Edward. There was no emotion on his face as he took in the sight of Edward tied to the chair and although Riley had wanted to be there when he took Edward down, James wasn't sure whether he was going to prove to be too squeamish for it or not. He really wasn't cut out for this kind of thing the way he was but he knew Riley wouldn't dare to go against him and it was time he toughened up.

"Good. You're just in time as well since we need to get started before he loses his awareness. Do you know what this is Edward?" James asked, waving the object he'd just taken from Riley in front of his face.

"No." He answered making James smile again.

"That little tin can your girlfriend calls a car isn't going anywhere without this so she isn't going to be riding to the rescue this time. Oh an in case you're worrying about who's going to pick Lucy up from school...Victoria will be there soon." He explained before laughing gleefully as Edward made another attempt at getting free only to cry out in pain.

"Leave them out of whatever this is. They've done nothing wrong!" He pleaded through gritted teeth and James couldn't resist the temptation so he yanked roughly on Edward's tied arms to hear him scream again.

"We haven't touched Bella and you should be happy we're willing to take Lucy in. She'll need family around once you're gone." He taunted, loving the way the colour drained from Edward's face and panic flashed through his eyes.

"You're going to kill me?" He blurted just making James smile more.

"It's only fair. An eye for an eye and all that. So...shall we get back to the story?" James asked flippantly as he put the chunk of Bella's car down on the table before leaning against it right in front of Edward's chair missing the way Riley's eyes flashed worriedly between him and Edward as he revealed the final part of his plans for the first time.

"So, I'd decided you needed to be taught a lesson. I knew you'd be just the same as Emmett, and I wasn't about to let you look down your nose at my sister and upset her like that so I planned the party. It was perfect really, I hadn't expected Emmett to turn up but you were easy enough to lure in once Jessica invited Angela and then when you did turn up with Emmett in toe it was even better. Not only would Jessica get what she wanted, but I got the joy of messing with Emmett's baby brother right underneath his nose. I knew it'd get to him when he found out what had happened and that was certainly payment enough for what he did to Victoria. It was all the prefect set up and you fell right into it. Of course, I hadn't counted on Jessica being lax about taking her pills, so the pregnancy threw up a bit of a problem.

We tried to convince her to abort it, but she just loved the idea of having your kid. She was fascinated with it, convinced it would be the prettiest kid to ever exist and she loved it from the very moment she found out she was pregnant. Then she gave birth and it all changed. She didn't want anything to do with it anymore. We thought maybe the reality of having a kid hadn't been what she'd expected and that she just needed a while to get used to it but it didn't seem to matter how much time she had, nothing changed. Then one day I came home to find the baby gone and Jess didn't even care. It took a while after then for any of us to realize what was really wrong. When she still wasn't getting happier she eventually went to the doctors, turns out she had post natal depression. Of course when she got better she felt terrible for what she'd done and she wanted the baby back, only we couldn't find you.

See this is where it gets messy. Had we been able to find you then, everything would have been fine but no. You'd vanished, run off with the kid and no one knew where you were. We asked all your friends but none of them had heard from you so we went to your parents and they told us you were in America. You have no idea how long we wasted looking for you there and by the time we came back it was too late. Jessica, my little sister, had killed herself because she couldn't stand the guilt of having abandoned her baby and it's all your fault."

"You drugged me, she dumped Lucy on me, my parents threw me out. I had no control over any of it and I didn't 'run off'. I went where I had to, I never tried to hide. I'm sorry she's dead but how was any of it my fault?" Edward snapped making James stand up from the table and lean in closer to him to make his point clear.

"Oh it is your fault alright. If you hadn't ignored Jess to begin with I wouldn't have had to drug you and you could have told someone where you went when you left your parents house like any normal person would have. If we hadn't been trying to trace you in America we would have been there to stop her doing what she did." He spat only just managing to hold onto his plan and not just give into the urge to destroy him already.

"Blame my parents then! They're the ones who made me leave and told you to look for me there. I didn't even know I had relatives in America until a couple of weeks ago." He argued desperately and James thought it was a shame that while he was trying to plead for his life, he was only succeeding in giving him more reasons to continue with his plan.

"I do blame them and the rest of your family but they will all get their comeuppance when you're gone. In fact you're the one getting off lightly. They'll have to live the rest of their lives knowing they failed to protect you." He explained and he could see the little hope Edward had had at being able to talk his way out of it leave which was good since there was nothing he could say that would change his mind. He'd been thinking it all over for the last year and any way he looked at it, it all boiled down to Edward. If he hadn't existed, Jessica would still be there.

"James you can't do this." Riley finally spoke up seeing the fight go out of Edward. The way James had described the plan before had not included murder and as they argued it had become apparent that James had kept more from them than just that.

"You can shut up." James snapped, turning his attention on his little brother and glaring at him but Riley didn't back down when he saw the dangerous glint in his eyes.

"You're going too far. You told us we were just going to scare him, make him hurt. What you're talking about now is murder and it's not right."

"Oh come on! You really thought I'd leave it at that? Jess suffered for months before taking her own life...you really thought just scaring him a little and leaving some superficial wounds would make up for all that?"

"I was all for making him suffer for it but you never told me you drugged him! What exactly could he have done differently to prevent what happened?" Riley asked only for James to ignore him.

"Actually you were the one who drugged him." He pointed out.

"What? I never gave him anything. I wouldn't have gone along with anything involving drugs." Riley argued having no recollection of giving Edward anything. James had talked him into getting Edward drinking at the party but he'd made himself the exact same drink.

"Well you did. You gave him the drink. Why do you think I told you to use a specific bottle of vodka?" James countered.

"I drank that stuff too! I just thought you wanted him to drink and loosen up a little and that was the strongest alcohol."

"God, you're almost as bad as he is." James muttered angrily gesturing toward Edward, wondering how his own brother could be so stupid. "It was spiked."

"So you drugged me as well then?" Riley asked indignantly beginning to see just what lengths James would go to, to get what he wanted.

"You were fine. You passed out in your room and I locked you in there for the night. No harm done." James brushed it off like it was no big deal but Riley bristled.

"You're crazy you know that? You can't do this, let Edward go." He demanded.

"Err no! If you don't like it you can leave but I'm getting vengeance for Jess. It's the last thing I can do for her and I won't fail her again."

"She wouldn't want this. When she didn't think she could handle Lucy she wanted her to be with her dad so why would she want anything different now? Lucy's already lost her mother, you can't take her dad from her too." Riley tried to reason but he could see it all over James' face. He'd cracked, and nothing was going to pull him back.

"He shouldn't have taken her baby from her! Our sister is dead and he has to pay for that." James snarled while advancing on Riley who backed away until he hit the wall. "You _wanted_ him to pay. It wasn't just me who's done all this. You helped me find him, helped me search this place and helped me trap him. You wanted this too."

"That was when I thought he'd done everything of his own free will." Riley argued weakly already knowing he was going to lose.

"It doesn't matter how he did it, just that he did." James responded coldly.

"You're insane." Riley stated.

"And you're getting on my nerves." James growled as he reached him and before Riley had chance to try and dodge him, James had him pinned to the wall with a hand around his throat. "Now you can either shut up and help me, get out of here or join Edward over there. Which is it?"

"I'm not helping you do this. It's wrong." He gasped so James tightened his grip. He wasn't going to let anyone ruin his plans now he was so close.

"Then get out now. I don't _want_ to hurt you, but I will if I have to." He warned before letting go and watching as Riley caught his breath.

Riley looked up at Edward and didn't know what to do. He knew James was serious with his threats, he always was. If he left now, Edward would be as good as dead but he already knew he couldn't beat James in a fight. Not on his own. He'd never been into violence the same way as James was, which had always seemed to come as a disappointment to him. Having seen James in action he knew he was no match for him. If he could have got Edward free they might have been able to overpower him but just a quick glance was enough to tell him Edward was in no fit state to try anything. His arm was at an odd angle and while he'd been arguing with James it seemed the drugs James had fed him had started to kick in as his eyes were slightly unfocused and he was slumped in the chair, way too relaxed for what was going on around him.

"I'm leaving." He finally choked out, rubbing at his throat and making James sneer as he held out his hand.

"Keys." He demanded not willing to give Riley any opportunity to play hero. Riley reluctantly handed over his set of keys as there was nothing he could do and turned to leave before James changed his mind about letting him walk out.

"Don't get any stupid ideas about calling for help or telling anyone. I will find you if you do and you won't like it when I get hold of you." James called after him and Riley knew that was a promise not just a threat so he just shut the door behind him silently promising that he'd make sure Lucy was safe at least as it was the only thing he could do. So long as James didn't contact Victoria first, he ought to at least be able to get her to hand Lucy over to him. Then he'd take her to Esme and Carlisle.

It was the only thing he could do for Edward now. Anything else right then and James would kill him too and from what he'd seen he was sure Edward would want Lucy to be safe above all else. He just hoped James meant it when he said he wanted him to suffer as at least then there would be a chance someone could find him in time.

* * *

><p>Bella tripped out of the taxi, catching herself on the open door before she could close it and hurry into the house. She was late, really late. In less than ten minutes the school bell would be ringing and two little girls would be standing by the gates wondering where she was. The plan had been to take the car, but even then ten minutes was pushing it and she just knew she was going to be late.<p>

The whole day had been a disaster from the moment they'd all left the school gates. Once Jasper had picked her up from her house the traffic had been awful, making them late to begin with. Then every lecturer had announced assessments or assignments. When she'd met up with Jasper and Peter for lunch, Jasper had discovered he had a late lecture that afternoon and wouldn't be able to drive her home yet had insisted she promise to get a taxi and not try to use the buses as she usually did. She'd tried to wave him off but he'd threatened to tell both Edward and Renee if she didn't and she really hadn't wanted them worried so she'd agreed. Her final lecture running late and the traffic still being chaotic had lead to where she was now.

Dumping her books by the door she ran up the stairs to get her car keys before quickly locking up after herself again and turning to Poppy. She really couldn't wait to get to Edward's and hoped whatever Garrett had wanted to talk to him about had been good as seeing him as happy as he'd been that morning really would make the day a lot better.

Turning the key in the ignition she waited for the roar of the engine to kick in and catch only to be met with a small click. Pulling the key out and stabbing it back in she tried again only to be met with the same clicking noise.

"No, no, no! Not today Poppy please."

Another attempt and still no roaring engine.

"Come on! Don't do this to me." She muttered, pleading with the car to just start. She'd been fine that morning, no problems at all and the electrics were still working so it wasn't a dead battery which was the only thing likely to be a quick fix. After one more failed attempt she slammed her fists against the steering wheel before sighing and climbing out.

"I swear if you don't start working there will be no more new shiny chrome for a while." She muttered as she felt for the bonnet release above the front grill before lifting the bonnet up and peering down inside. It didn't take long for her to work out what Poppy's problem was. A quick glance was enough to realise the distributer was missing and as she stared at the gap where it should have been connected she got a really bad feeling.

Digging through her pockets she found her mobile and with shaking hands flicked through the contacts for Edward's number. It rang and rang but no one answered so when it kicked into the answering phone message she cancelled the call and tried his home number. No one answered that either and she really started to panic. Edward should have been home and he should have been answering his phone. He could have been asleep but considering how excited he'd been that morning it didn't seem likely and he definitely wouldn't have left the flat on his own to miss the landline ringing.

Another try at both numbers still got no response so she tried Emmett's mobile only for it to go straight to the answer phone.

Staring at her phone she didn't know what to do. There were five minutes left before the school bell rang and the car wasn't going anywhere. Distributers didn't just fall out or vanish either and it seemed too much of a coincidence that Edward wasn't answering his phone. Something was going on, something really bad and all she was sure of was she was in the wrong place.

Slamming the bonnet back down she looked at it a moment longer as she tried to control her panic. Panicking wouldn't get her anywhere. Right now she had to concentrate on what she needed to do and her first priority had to be the girls. Not only would Edward never forgive her if she let something happen to Lucy but they were also closer. She'd just have to keep trying Edward's number on the way and she could call a taxi to meet them at the school gates and take them to his flat as it would be quicker for her to run to the school than wait for the taxi to arrive at her house.

The plan decided, she pulled up the number for the school on her mobile and waited for them to answer so she could warn them she'd be late and ask them to keep an eye on Lucy and Anna while praying she wasn't already too late for Lucy. 

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><p><em>AN - I know that one jumped around a bit, I hope it wasn't too annoying to read. Congratulations to TD69 as she figured out all of James' motives a long time ago..couldn't hide anything from her! <em>

_Once again, thank you so much to everyone who has been reviewing, you are all very appreciated :)_


	37. Chapter 35 Fight For Us

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer and the chapter title belongs to another Fightstar song.

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><p><em>And you'll see the hearts<em>

_That will break_

_If you walk away and just leave us here_

_To bury this mess._

_Fight For Us – Fightstar_

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><p><strong>Chapter 35 – Fight For Us<strong>

A car pulled up behind Bella and startled her as she was saying goodbye to the school receptionist. She jumped as a car door slammed shut and felt the panic rise up again as she turned to see who had parked in front of their house, ready to run if it was James or his friends. Instead she almost cried in relief when she saw Phil standing by his car looking at her with concern as she flung herself into his arms.

Taken by surprise Phil wasn't quite sure what to do as he could feel Bella shaking, and while they'd always got on well he couldn't say she'd ever been one for offering hugs. He knew she should have already been at the school gates to pick up Anna so the only conclusion he could come to was something was seriously wrong.

"What's going on Bella?" He asked, pulling back and holding her at arm's length so he could get a good look at her. The fear in her watery eyes and the paler than usual complexion were not what he'd wanted to see and it started to make him worry that something had happened to Anna or Renee. Bella didn't usually let things get to her and he couldn't really remember ever seeing her upset like she was right then.

"Help me get the car seats into your car." She said urgently instead of answering, his question seeming to have kicked her into action as she pulled out of his hold and hurried over to her car. She yanked the door open and roughly pulled the seat forward while Phil followed her bewilderedly, noting that he'd never seen her treat her beloved car so harshly.

"What's wrong with Poppy?" He questioned as he waited for her to get the first of the booster seats free so he could lift it out. She was too focused on what she was doing for him to get the answers he really needed so he was going to have to coax the information out of her slowly and considering how she was treating the car and her sole mindedness in removing the booster seats it made him realise there had to be something wrong with it. Looking at the car himself he couldn't see anything obviously wrong suggesting it was something mechanical to do with the engine which seemed odd as usually if it was something minor Bella could fix it herself or if not the breakdown cover would be used. Car faults were common when it came to Poppy and were usually just met with resigned annoyance so it certainly didn't account for the level of fear Bella was radiating but it was somewhere to start.

"Someone's removed the distributer." She muttered in response as her hands slipped on the catch she was working on as they were shaking so badly. He watched her with concern for a moment wondering what he could do to calm her before what she said really sank in and he realised the strangeness of it.

"Removed it? Why would they do that?" He asked as the first seat finally came free and he took it from her automatically so she could start work on the second one.

"I'm not sure but Edward's not answering his phone either and I'm meant to be picking Lucy up but I'm already so late." She rambled but it was enough for Phil to finally understand what had rattled her so much. It wasn't about the car at all. Renee had filled him in on what had been going on so he could see how she'd think someone might want to delay her on the school run if she was meant to be collecting Lucy. Considering how little the distributer was worth he couldn't help but think she was right. Other than to keep Bella out of the way there would have been no reason to take it. It certainly wouldn't have been worth much to anyone to be worth stealing it.

"You think it's the guys who hurt him? That's something's going on with them right now?" He asked to confirm what he was thinking and when she nodded he realised just how serious things could be and hoped that even with her panic she'd managed to think clearly enough to alert the school. "Have you called the school, told them you're going to be late so they know not to let the girls leave with anyone else?"

"Yes, that was what I was doing when you pulled up but we might still be too late. We need to get there and then check on Edward." She responded, glancing up at him with fearful eyes so he helped her with her hurrying, taking the first seat back to his car and securing it while she finished getting the second one out.

It was less than ten minutes after Phil had pulled up that they were back on the road but that was already five minutes after the bell so by the time they would get there the girls would have been waiting for fifteen minutes and another try at both Edward's numbers still got no answer.

"He's still not answering and he wouldn't just ignore his phones like this." Bella worried aloud to Phil as he drove making it clear that it wasn't just the girls she was worrying about.

"He might be sleeping, or in the shower or something." He tried to console her but he was aware it did seem unlikely given the circumstances. For the time being though there was nothing they could do, until they knew for sure that something was going on they couldn't even call the police and the girls had to be the first priority. They could worry about Edward once they had them safely buckled into the backseat.

"No, I can feel it. Something's really wrong. I can't get hold of Emmett either." She commented before it finally occurred to her that Phil wasn't even meant to be there. "I thought you weren't home until tomorrow?"

"That was the plan but your mum rang and suggested I take some time off and I figured it was a good idea so I cut the trip short. Looks like its good that I did." He answered and Bella caught sight of what he was staring at as they stopped by the school. There was a very familiar head of red curly hair stood in the middle of a group of parents and teachers and even with the doors and windows on the car shut she could hear Lucy crying and screaming for her dad.

Bolting out of the car, Bella headed for the group, not waiting to see if Phil was following or not and quickly located Lucy standing by her teacher who was trying to calm her only Lucy wouldn't let her near her, crying harder every time she moved closer. Ignoring Victoria for the moment she headed straight for Lucy who looked up at the movement in the crowd and as soon as she spotted it was Bella she broke free of the teachers surrounding her to reach her.

"I'm so sorry I was late. Poppy broke down." Bella apologised as she caught her, lifting her up and letting her cuddle into her. She was so relieved to find Lucy still there and apparently unharmed. "Are you ok? Did she hurt you?"

"She tried to make me leave with her but I wouldn't go." Lucy cried making Bella relax just a little as it appeared Lucy really was ok. Tears she could handle if it meant she didn't have to face Edward and tell him she'd lost his daughter.

"I want my daddy."

"I know you do sweetheart but it's all ok. You're safe now. I won't let Victoria near you." Bella promised, buoyed by her relief and for the moment forgetting the rest of her concerns.

"She said Daddy wasn't coming for me." Lucy mumbled.

"Lucy he wasn't meant to be here, I was meant to be picking you up today remember?" Bella tried to comfort her but she shook her head as that wasn't what she'd meant.

"No, they've hurt Daddy again." She responded making Bella hold her tighter against herself as the reality of what could be going on while they stood there crashed down on her again. She was still hoping she was wrong about why Edward wasn't answering his phones but with Victoria standing nearby it seemed more and more unlikely.

"We don't know that yet Luce and there's no point crying over something that might not have happened yet." She tried again to comfort her while taking note of her own words in an attempt to stay calm for Lucy. They didn't know anything yet and panicking was only going to make things worse. That didn't remove the need to get to Edward's flat as soon as possible though so she looked for Phil and spotted him talking to the teachers, Anna standing at his side and holding onto his hand.

Carrying Lucy towards them she caught just enough of the conversation to gather Victoria had tried to take Lucy before the receptionist had managed to get the message through that no one was to collect her other than Bella. Lucy had thrown the loudest tantrum anyone had ever heard from her and had dug her heels in, refusing to leave and managing to cause a big enough scene that Victoria hadn't been able to push her way through the gathering parents before Lucy's teacher had made it outside. She was so proud to hear Lucy had put up a fight but they didn't have time to stand there discussing the details any longer.

"Phil we need to get going." Bella announced breaking in to the discussion and gaining everyone's stares. Even Victoria glanced to her though Bella missed the amusement dancing in her eyes as she was avoiding looking at the redhead for fear she'd end up doing something she'd regret.

"Wait, we called the police, they'll want to talk to you." Lucy's teacher tried to stop them but Bella paid no attention as she looked up at Phil.

"We need to get to Edward." She said as quietly as she could, not wanting to set Lucy off again as she finally seemed to be calming down but needing him to understand how urgent it was that they left. They couldn't hang around waiting for the police to arrive, there wasn't time.

"Take Lucy over to the car, we'll be there in a minute." Phil suggested, understanding the plea in Bella's eyes, and thankful once again that he was there Bella did as he said, letting him deal with the teachers.

As they moved away from the crowd Lucy's harsh tears had turned into sniffles so Bella was hopeful she'd have settled down by the time they reached the car until she heard Victoria call her name. Despite her attempt to ignore Victoria, hearing her own name called automatically stopped her and she turned to face her before she'd even registered what she was doing.

"You're already too late." Victoria called with a smug smile once she knew she had Bella's attention, apparently unbothered by the teachers that where holding her in place. Bella knew exactly what that meant and the weak control she'd struggled to gain over her panic threatened to crack. Lucy had never been the real target; she was just part of the distraction and they were in the wrong place.

"Phil! We need to go _now_!" She shouted trying to ignore Victoria's girlish laughter as she ran the last few steps to the car and helped Lucy into her seat. They might have hurt Edward already but considering she hadn't even been expecting Phil home, she had to hope they might still have a chance to get to him in time as they couldn't have been planning for her to get there yet. It was a slim chance but they had to get moving for there to be any chance at all.

"Daddy really is in danger isn't he?" Lucy asked quietly, her tears almost gone but the sad, hopeless tone to her voice was shattering and though Bella wanted to comfort her, she didn't want to lie to her either.

"I don't know sweetheart but we're going to him now. I need you to be brave for me for just a little longer. You did so well with Victoria, you're Daddy will be so proud of you." She said, trying to comfort her without lying, it was hard but it seemed to be the right thing to do as she saw the resolve come through Lucy's eyes and she sucked in a deep breath before letting it out slowly and settling herself. The tears were gone, and in their place was the fiercely protective five year old they'd all met at the hospital who would do anything for her daddy. Bella could hear Phil and Anna getting nearer so she kissed Lucy's forehead before straightening up.

"You are such an amazing girl Luce." She commented before shutting her door and heading for the passenger seat just as Phil helped Anna into the car.

"They wanted us to stay and wait for the police but I told them we needed to go and to give them our contact details instead." Phil announced once he'd got into the car and Bella just nodded as they pulled away, her eyes drifting back over to Victoria.

"She said we're already too late." She commented quietly.

"I heard but she can't know that for sure. If their plan was to delay you than we're already ahead of their schedule." He responded, echoing her earlier thoughts and while Bella noticed he was driving faster than he normally did as they headed in the direction of Edward's flat block it did little to calm her.

"Try ringing him again." Phil suggested so she pulled out her phone again but instead of going to the answering machines this time both numbers were just unavailable. That wasn't good.

"Unavailable." She announced for Phil and he could hear the panic in her voice again so he put his foot down and hoped they didn't get stopped for speeding as he tried to get them there as fast as possible.

When they reached the flat block Bella raced out of the car, ignoring Phil's calls for her to wait for him. He hung back at the car for just long enough to unbuckle the girls and tell them to press the horn if anyone came to the car before he locked them in and chased after Bella knowing that he couldn't let her go in there alone. He managed to catch up to her outside Edward's flat where she was knocking on the door frantically and calling Edward's name and he was briefly glad that she hadn't been able to get inside until he realised what that would mean for Edward if he was in there.

"It's locked and he's not answering." She told Phil when she realised he was there and he eyed the door for a moment before looking back to Bella.

"You're sure he's in there?" He asked and she nodded.

"He wouldn't go out on his own, and he would have text me to say if he was. He knew I was planning to hang around for a while after dropping Lucy off." She explained, banging at the door again.

"Ok, then stand back a second." Phil warned before backing up himself and running at the door, hitting it with his shoulder and thanks to the age and disrepair of the building the door easily gave. Shoving it out of their way he lead Bella into the flat, cautious of what they'd find but when it was clear the place was silent Bella passed him and headed into the living room while he went to check the bedrooms.

The first thing Bella saw when she walked into the living room was the landline phone pulled out of the wall and smashed on the floor. Seeing that made her heart pound and dread flood through her as she moved towards the kitchen and then everything stopped and she thought she was going to faint as she tried to make sense of what she was looking at.

Edward lay sprawled on the kitchen floor, in what looked to be the splintered remains of one of his kitchen chairs. Every inch of skin she could see was red or bruising, his eyes were swollen shut and there were fine cuts covering his skin. A pool of blood was gathering around him and as her gaze fell away from his face she could see something protruding from the left side of his abdomen that she just couldn't make sense off. It almost looked like a chair leg.

Unable to look at it any longer her gaze moved back up and that was when she saw a name written clumsily on the kitchen floor in his blood right next to the mangled remains of his mobile phone.

James Hadrian

The anger at seeing his name there snapped Bella out of her horror and she shouted for Phil before crossing the kitchen and dropping down to her knees at Edward's side. The blood was still escaping from the wound in his abdomen so she pulled off her hoody and carefully wrapped it around the wooden pole that was stuck there, pushing down a little to try and stop the blood flow but trying to avoid moving the object.

"Edward can you hear me?" She called hoping he'd stir but there was no response and he hadn't even twitched when she'd applied pressure to his wound so she knew he was unconscious. Catching sight of the blood that surrounded him again she wasn't really surprised, she was just glad he was still breathing and they hadn't been too late. They could still help him.

Phil joined her then and started to check his breathing and pulse seeing that she'd got the worst of the bleeding covered. Satisfied they were both there even if they were weak he reached for his phone to call an ambulance while keeping his fingers against the pulse point in his neck to make sure it stayed there. He didn't like the speed it was racing at.

"There's an ambulance already on its way, it should be here in a couple of minutes." Phil relayed to Bella what he'd just been told but they didn't have long to wonder over who had called it as at that moment they both became aware of the same thing.

"He's not breathing." Bella whispered and while she watched horrified at what was happening to the man she was sure she loved Phil started CPR.

It felt like hours to Bella before they heard the heavy footsteps of the approaching paramedics but in reality it was only a few minutes. All Bella could focus on though was the fact Edward still wasn't breathing on his own and as Phil stepped out of the way for the paramedics, they took over. They were asking questions but Bella was glad Phil was there as at that moment she didn't know any of the answers. She couldn't think past the fact that Edward was dying and her hopes that they'd arrived in time were proving false.

Someone pulled her away from where she knelt by his side and it was only when she was turned towards that person's chest and away from Edward that she realised it was Phil.

"He's breathing again." He murmured in an attempt to comfort her although he knew that would be hopeless if she could see the paramedics. One was working around the abdominal wound and the other was taping down a tube that had just been inserted into the top of his chest. It was only after that had been inserted that he'd started to breathe again but Phil doubted that procedure would have been anything Bella would want to see.

With Edward's t-shirt cut open so the paramedics could see what they were doing it was very apparent that Edward had been severely beaten. Every inch of skin was marred and now he wasn't concentrating on keeping Edward alive Phil could see what Bella had refused to earlier; it was a broken chair leg that had been stabbed into him. From the splintered, bloody appearance of the visible part it looked as though that was what had been used to beat him as well rather than just fists.

Having packed the abdominal wound as well as he could the paramedic moved onto checking the rest of him and Phil noticed the way he grimaced at Edward's right leg as he carefully felt it before reaching for the scissors again to cut through his jeans. With them splayed open it was easy to see the swelling around his knee and the odd angle the lower part of his leg was laid in. The paramedic made quick work of splinting and securing it before moving on and still not wanting Bella to see what they were doing, Phil kept her held against him.

She didn't even try to fight his hold so he knew she was taking what had happened hard although he couldn't blame her. Just looking at Edward was enough to show it was going to be a fight to keep him going. As they moved him onto the stretcher he could see the paramedics being particularly careful of his left arm and as they did so it drew Phil's attention and though the dislocated shoulder was another concern he was distracted by the red, raw rings around his wrist. Looking between Edward and the ruined pieces of chair he realised he must have been tied to it before it was broken. He hadn't even been given the chance to fight.

The paramedics had asked Phil what had happened, he'd told them he didn't know and he was beginning to believe he didn't want to.

Police flooded into the flat just as they were carrying Edward out. Phil stood well back to let them through and watched as the officer in charge glanced briefly at Edward before stepping through into the living room and peering in at the blood stained kitchen. It seemed to be all he needed to see and Phil got the impression he had already known what to expect as he started to bark orders at his men before turning back to them and announcing that statements would be taken at the hospital.

It was a whirlwind of movement after that. While the majority of the police officers that had arrived stayed behind, the one in charge and a few others led them out of the flat building to escort them to the hospital. Phil was confused at first as they ushered him towards his car while Bella climbed into the ambulance along with Edward as none of them had asked any questions yet but after the ambulance had been seen off, a police car leading it's way, the one in charge yelled over to him to meet them at the hospital, addressing him by name.

He was left to stare after him as he climbed into another police car that charged after the ambulance wondering how they knew who he was before the sound of Lucy banging her fists against the car window caught his attention and he realised now wasn't the time to be pondering questions as he turned to his car to get the girls buckled back in and try and placate Lucy a little before they reached the hospital.

As he pulled away from the car park, yet another police car following him, he still couldn't shake the feeling that something was odd with the way the police had turned up and the thought struck him that they didn't know who had called for help. The ambulance had already been dispatched by the time he had called and when they'd arrived at the flat it was locked and Edward was alone. The rest of the building had seemed quiet and there had been no concerned neighbours standing around or knocking on the door trying to help yet the police already seemed to know what had happened and who would be there. There was definitely something strange about that.

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><p>Emmett was at the end of his wits. He'd been searching all afternoon for his phone and had found no sign of it. It wasn't in his desk or car, he'd scoured the whole of his floor three times and gone down to the main reception to see if anyone had handed it in but it appeared it had just vanished as no one had seen it.<p>

Laurent was still at his desk trying to fix his computer and when he asked how it was going or how much longer it would take he just got shrugs for answers. He was quickly growing to hate Laurent and was getting the impression the man was enjoying winding him up. He wouldn't have been at all surprised if he was dragging the task out longer than necessary just for his own amusement at watching Emmett stress himself out.

It was just as he was about to head out of the office to see if he could find a payphone to call Edward on that the lift doors opposite his desk opened and two police officers stepped out along with his father. Wondering what was going on he decided to hang on for a few minutes and see who they were there to see. Movement behind him drew his attention though so he glanced to Laurent just in time to see him look up at the police officers before he got to his feet and ran.

Emmett watched in confusion as he ran in the direction of the stairs only for one of the police officers to chase after him, easily taking him down well before he had chance to get the door to the stairs open.

"Excuse me, are you Emmett Masen?"

Jumping at the sound of his own name, Emmett forced himself to stop staring at where the police officer had Laurent pinned on his front on the floor as he cuffed him to see the other officer standing next to him.

"Yes...what's going on?" He asked as he wondered why they'd want to speak to him when they obviously had a problem with Laurent. He'd never met the guy before that afternoon.

"We'll need to ask you some questions later on but right now you ought to be heading to the hospital." The officer stated, "Someone will take your statement there."

"Hospital? Statement? What?..." He was lost, but as the officer's face took on a sympathetic expression he got a sinking feeling.

"You're brother has just been taken in, in a serious condition." He informed him, instantly kicking Emmett into action as he reached for his jacket and headed for the lift not needing to hear anything else right then. He came to a stop just in front of the lifts however as he came face to face with his father who was still standing there looking between the police, a cursing Laurent and Emmett with a frown on his face.

Not giving himself chance to think about the fact he had most likely heard what the police officer had told him yet still stood there cold and disapproving, Emmett just brushed passed him and continued on his way to his car. He didn't care whether he was fired for leaving early or not. He'd had it with his job and his father's inane ability to keep him away from Edward when he needed him most.

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><p>"There's nothing I can tell you. I don't know anything else." Elizabeth sighed as she sat across from Esme in her kitchen. She'd been surprised to see her sister standing on her doorstep that afternoon but even more so when she'd gone straight to questioning her about Edward. It had been an uncomfortable conversation for many reasons. For one, she hadn't seen her sister in years and the last time they'd parted it had not been on good terms. For another, she didn't like to talk about Edward. She'd known all along that what she and her husband had done that night five years ago had been wrong but there was nothing she could have done so she'd followed her husband's lead and tried to pretend they didn't have a second son. It hurt to think about him so she usually tried not to. It was better that way.<p>

When Esme had asked if anyone had come looking for Edward she'd had trouble remembering but when she'd described the man the ghost of a memory had come to her. It had been years ago, and as it had to do with Edward she'd done her best to forget it and even with Esme jogging her memory all she could tell her was that he'd been there. Ed had been the one to speak to him and whatever had been said lasted barely five minutes so there wasn't anything she could tell Esme which just seemed to frustrate her sister.

For all she was trying to appear indifferent, Elizabeth was glad Esme and Carlisle had found Edward. From what she'd heard either through Alice or what Esme had just told her it sounded as though he needed them. She wished she could be there for him herself but it just wasn't possible. At least now she knew there was someone looking after him and she knew Esme would take good care of him. It made it a little easier to think of him and she would have liked to be able to help them but she just didn't know anything.

"You're sure there's nothing else? They're threatening Lucy now and we need to work out how to stop it." Esme pressed, although she could see from the sadness in her sister's eyes as she shook her head that she was telling the truth. She didn't know anything.

"No, you'd have to ask Ed but I doubt he'd talk to you. You know what he's like."

"Yes, I do." Esme responded, the mention of Edward Senior breaking through her calm facade as the anger once again bubbled up at what they'd done, what her sister had let happen, "Why do you stand by him? Edward is your son."

"And Ed's my husband." Elizabeth answered as if that explained everything while fidgeting with the handle on her tea cup, "I'm glad you found Edward. It's good to know he's got family around him again. I know what you must think of me but I do love him and I hate what's been done."

"Then do something about it!" Esme growled in frustration only to receive no response so she continued with something that had bothered her from the moment they'd discovered what had happened as she just couldn't understand how her sister could have stood by and let it all happen without at least trying to help Edward, "Why didn't you just send him to us rather than lie about it? You know I would have been glad to take him and Lucy in."

"It all happened so fast. There wasn't chance. Ed had him out the door before any of us really knew what was going on." Elizabeth answered simply but it did nothing to soothe Esme's anger.

"I don't know how you can bare to live in the same house as that man." She spat, pushing her chair away from the table and getting to her feet. She couldn't stand to be there a minute longer. It had all been a pointless waste of time anyway and she had the sudden feeling that she should have just spent the afternoon with Edward.

Elizabeth made no move to follow her as she gathered her coat and bag. She stayed at the table, staring into her empty tea cup knowing Esme was right to be angry with her. She wanted to explain it, make excuses as to why she'd let her son down so badly and plead for another chance but she knew it was too late and there was nothing she could say so it was better for everyone if Esme left. Edward had family now, he didn't need her anymore and there was nothing she could have done even if he did. The thought made her want to cry but she held the tears back knowing she had no right to them.

The ringing of Esme's mobile brought her head up and she looked to where her sister had paused in the kitchen doorway, a frown on her face as she looked at the phone before answering. The way her face paled as she listened to whoever was on the other end had Elizabeth on her feet and at Esme's side in seconds.

"Emmett slow down...what's going on?" Hearing her oldest son's name Elizabeth wanted to ask what was being said as she started to worry. He should have been at work, not phoning Esme with distressing news and she knew how her husband felt about staff making personal calls from work. It had to be urgent for Emmett to risk incurring his wrath.

"Carlisle should already be there, he's working. I'll meet you all there as soon as I can." Esme ended the call and turned to her sister with haunted eyes.

"That son you like to pretend doesn't exist? He's on his way to hospital. The police say he's in a critical condition."

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><p>Sitting in the back of the ambulance Bella was trying to get control of her panic again. It had occurred to her as she'd sat holding his hand and listening to the steady rhythm of his heart monitor that he'd need her to be strong for him. Lucy was going to be upset enough without seeing Bella fall apart in front of her so by the time they arrived at the hospital she was determined to be composed. Edward needed her to take care of Lucy and she was determined not to let him down.<p>

It was difficult though as she looked at him. She'd thought the last time he'd been in hospital was awful but this, this was so much worse. James had really gone for it and it was blatantly clear that this hadn't just been a game to him anymore. What he'd done to Edward was meant to be fatal and as she watched the paramedic flutter around him, checking various things and looking at the still bleeding abdominal wound with obvious concern she knew it still might be.

She'd only really known Edward for just over a month but she couldn't bear to think of life without him now. He and Lucy had quickly become an ingrained part of her life and they had so much to look forward to. She couldn't lose him now but just as she thought it the paramedic shouted through to the driver to hurry, saying something about falling oxygen levels and blood pressure while she could hear the increase of his heart rate through the monitors he was connected to and she had to let go of the hand she was gripping as the paramedic lurched into frantic motion as he tried to stop Edward from crashing.

The driver called back that they were less than five minutes away from the hospital but Bella thought she heard the paramedic working on Edward murmur about it being too late just as an alarm sounded marking the end of the rapid heartbeats she'd been listening too.

More frantic calls were shared between the paramedics as the one in the back started chest compressions again. Bella couldn't understand most of what was said as the medical jargon being used made no sense to her but she didn't have time to question what was going on as they came to a sudden stop and the doors were pulled open leaving her to watch as nurses and doctors joined them and they wheeled Edward away.

Bella climbed down from the ambulance and followed them, coming to a stop in the main reception of the hospital when she was told she could go no further and she felt the tears gathering again as she stared at the door Edward had just been taken through, the paramedic still trying to keep his heart beating.

She felt so lost as she stood there willing him to fight and not give up. Lucy needed him, _she_needed him. He just couldn't give up, not now, not after everything he'd already made it through. He'd proved time and again that he'd do anything for his daughter and Bella prayed he'd find the strength to do it again and not let himself be taken away from her. It was the only hope she had. He had to fight for them.

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><p><em>AN - This chapter is posted especially for those who aren't currently in America and glued to their DVD players. I'm so jealous Breaking Dawn Part 1 was released over there today when we don't get it here until the 12th of March...so not fair! <em>


	38. Chapter 36 Fearful Determination

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 36 – Fearful Determination<strong>

Carlisle was on his way for some fresh air. What he really needed was a hug from his wife, but she wasn't there so the fresh air would just have to do.

It had been a hard, chaotic day and even though he'd been there since seven that morning he was only just getting his first break. He was tired and hungry, having missed lunch and as he strolled through the corridors he decided he'd sit outside for five minutes before he went in search of some food. The motorway accident had kept them run off their feet with so many casualties making it seem like they had nowhere near enough staff but they'd got through it all and they hadn't lost a patient yet that day which was something to be proud of.

He rounded the corner of the last corridor before he hit the main reception and as he did he could hear the commotion in the E.R. indicating a new patient had arrived. Sighing he felt the pull that urged him to see if he could help but he managed to only slow as he walked past the room, briefly glancing in to see the room filled with medical staff. There were enough people in there that they wouldn't need him and in his current state he knew he'd be better off continuing on with his plan of going outside and getting something to eat. He could check back in and see how things were going once he was feeling a little more human again.

Hearing the calls and orders being given in the room as he walked away he felt a little bad for being glad it wasn't his patient. What he'd heard hadn't sounded encouraging and he really didn't want a death on his hands when he'd managed the rest of the day with a clean record.

Pushing through the final set of swing doors he was confronted with the main reception and was a little relieved to find it fairly quiet. There were still plenty of people waiting to be seen but it was nowhere near as full as it could be. The couple of police officers hovering by the doors and the other pair by the reception desk were nothing too unusual either especially considering the state of the patient in the E.R. and he was just glad they didn't appear to be there to keep track of an injured criminal for a change as that always made life difficult.

His relief at the state of the reception only lasted as long as it took him to take another two steps however as he then came face to face with a shell shocked Bella.

She was pale, her eyes wide and glassy and he wondered briefly if she was waiting to be treated but then he noticed she was standing and staring off at the doors he'd just come through, totally unaware he was even there. Suddenly he didn't feel so tired as he studied her a little closer, now seeing how she was shaking as she stood there in just a thin t-shirt and jeans. There were dark stains smudged into the blue fabric of her t-shirt and he'd seen enough blood to know what it looked like on any colour fabric. Her jeans were also stained around the knees and lower legs suggesting she'd been kneeling in a pool of the stuff recently which really wasn't a good sign for whoever the blood belonged to.

"Bella?" He asked tentatively, not wanting to startle her but needing to gain her attention. It seemed to work as she finally pulled her eyes away from the door to stare blankly at him.

"Hey Carlisle." She mumbled, glancing back over to the door and reaching up to run a hand through her hair but noticing the blood on her hands Carlisle grabbed hold of her wrist to stop her. She didn't pull against his grip but looked to where he was holding her and got caught staring at the blood like she hadn't known it was there before.

"Are you ok?" He asked knowing full well it was a stupid question as she obviously wasn't but he wanted her to snap out of the daze she was in and it was as good a question as any to start with.

"I guess, it's not my blood." She shrugged, still looking at her hands and obviously assuming that was what he was asking about.

"Whose blood is it?" Carlisle asked beginning to wonder who she'd come in with as there was no one else in the reception he recognized. Having a vague idea of what the time was he hoped it wasn't her little sister as he knew the schools would have been out by then and she was usually was the one to look after her.

"Edward's." She whispered and speaking his name seemed to bring her awareness back as her head suddenly shot up and he could see the horror flood into her eyes before she looked back to her hands and worried at her lower lip.

"Edward's just been brought in?" Carlisle questioned feeling the terror start to hit him as well as he remembered what he'd just walked past moments before. That couldn't have been Edward they were working on, from what he'd heard the patient had only just been holding on but Bella nodded leaving Carlisle torn. His first instinct was to go help with Edward and make sure he was ok but at the same time he didn't want to just leave Bella standing there on her own and covered in his blood. He wished Esme was there.

"Where are Esme and Lucy?" He asked, feeling a whole new round of terror as he realised they should have been with Edward and he couldn't see them anywhere in the reception. Esme had told him that morning she would be picking Lucy up from school and spending the afternoon with Edward until Emmett got home.

"Lucy's in the car with Phil. They were following us. I don't know where Esme is, she asked this morning if I could collect Lucy as she had a last minute meeting she had to attend." She answered, calming Carlisle a little as she confirmed they weren't hurt but still leaving him unsettled as he didn't know what the meeting Esme had gone to would be. He didn't think there was much she'd put before spending the afternoon with Edward and Lucy. That was a problem that could wait to be solved though as he still had to work out what to do about Edward and Bella which was far more urgent. He needed to see Edward and find out what was wrong with him but knowing that Lucy would be getting there soon he couldn't just leave Bella standing there covered in Edward's blood.

He looked around the reception trying to find an answer and spotted Sally Richards, one of the older nurses he preferred to work with heading to the reception desk. She was in her late forties, didn't try to flirt with any of the doctors and was an amazing nurse who had a very motherly nature which was perfect for what he needed right then so he called out to her and she turned, a smile on her face as she greeted him.

"I thought you were going on your break Dr. Cullen." She chastised him, well aware of the busy morning he'd had as she'd been right there with him for most of it.

"I was but my nephew has just been brought in. This is his girlfriend, Bella. I was wondering if you could help her get cleaned up while I go and check on him." He said and her smile dropped as she took in Bella's sorry state.

"Of course. I hope he's ok, if you need anything else let me know." She responded sincerely before turning to Bella and offering her a sympathetic smile. "Come on dear, let's get you sorted."

Bella looked to Carlisle who tried to smile encouragingly before she looked to Sally doubtfully.

"But Edward...I don't want to go..." She mumbled uncertainly as her eyes flicked to the door behind Carlisle again. She didn't want to walk away from him.

"Bella you can't do anything for him right now and he's in good hands. Go with Sally and I'll find you when there's any news." Carlisle urged her but Bella was still unsure as she wasn't sure how long Edward would be able to hold on for and she wanted to be there for him. He shouldn't be on his own.

"He's not good Carlisle. James...he...I think he tried to...kill him." She told him, struggling just to get the words out that she didn't want to be true but having had plenty of chance to see the extent of his wounds in the back of the ambulance there was no denying it and she needed Carlisle to understand.

"Well he's not going to succeed. Go with Sally, I'm going to go see if I can help his doctors." He stated firmly already turning to head back through the doors he'd just come through as Bella's words lit a fire of determination in him but Sally reached out and grabbed his arm lightly to stop him.

"Are you sure that's wise Dr. Cullen?" She asked quietly but when he turned back to face them she could see the set in his eyes. There would be no dissuading him and as the head of the emergency department there wasn't many who'd try arguing with him.

"I can do my job, don't worry about that. Look after Bella for me, my nephew's daughter will be here soon and she'll need her." He responded making it clear to Sally what he expected as he glanced pointedly to Bella's bloodstained clothes and so as not to give Sally chance to try and change his mind again he turned and left before she could say anything more. He was not going to lose his nephew and he was damn sure not going to let his staff lose him.

His determination waned a little as he got closer to the E.R. Having some idea of what he was going to be walking into from what he'd heard on his way past earlier he wasn't quite sure he could handle seeing Edward like that. He half hoped they'd turn him away but then again he was head of the department for a reason so he had to at least try. He might not want to see Edward that way but he also wouldn't be able to stand it if they lost him and he hadn't at least tried to save him. Knowing he had no real choice about whether he walked into that E.R. or not, he took a deep breath and steeled himself for what he was about to see.

He was just another patient and it was time to do his job. They were not going to be putting a blot on their clean record for the day.

* * *

><p>Bella followed Sally through the doors on the opposite side of the receptionist's desk to the ones Carlisle had gone through. She still wasn't sure she wanted to leave the last spot she'd seen Edward from, it felt wrong to be walking away from him, but the hand Sally had placed between her shoulder blades was guiding her and urging her to keep up.<p>

She guessed Carlisle had probably been right to suggest she try to get cleaned up as the last thing she wanted to be covered in was blood, especially Edward's blood. She hadn't even noticed it before Carlisle had brought it to her attention, too focused on what was going on with Edward. Now though she could feel it, smell it even and as she found herself looking at her hands again she started to feel a little queasy.

"Don't look at it dear, we'll get it all cleaned off in a moment." Sally's kind voice broke through her musings and she looked up at the nurse, paying attention to her properly for the first time. She had a very friendly face with the kind of smile that automatically put you at ease. She looked like the kind of person you could tell all your secrets too and get a hug in return. Bella imagined she made a very good nurse.

"Thank you." She murmured, grateful for the distraction she'd offered as she never had been good at dealing with blood and needing the conversation to stop her gaze from drifting back to her hands.

"No need to thank me. Now, we're a little busy today so I think we'll just head in here. It's the nurses' locker room." Sally responded, pushing open a door they'd just arrived at and letting Bella step in before her. It was a large room that was lined with rows of grey metal lockers and long benches ran through the middle of the area. It reminded Bella of the changing rooms in her secondary school gym.

"There are showers just through there and I'll find you a spare set of scrubs for when you're done." Sally added, pointing towards the back of the room where Bella could see an open space instead of more lockers. "If you just leave your jeans and t-shirt on the end of that bench I'll get a bag to put them into."

Bella just nodded, still feeling a little dazed by everything but she followed Sally's instructions so when she heard the door shut behind her as Sally went in search of the scrubs and bag, she headed towards the showers. Turning at the end of the row of lockers she found a long row of shower cubicles along two of the walls but she was thankful to see a couple of sinks on the third wall as well.

She washed her hands at one of the sinks, careful to get every speck of the drying blood off before drying them as she didn't want to get any more of it on her clothes. After that was done she went back into the main room to check she was still on her own and then carefully pulled her jeans and t-shirt off, trying not to get anymore of the blood on her although some of it had seeped through the fabric onto her skin anyway so she was grateful Sally had suggested the showers.

Stepping into one of the shower cubicles she felt the warm water revive her somewhat. Unfortunately that brought back the images of Edward crashing in the back of the ambulance and there was nothing she could do to stop the tears. She knew Carlisle would do everything he could for him but she just wasn't sure it would be enough.

She had no idea what she was going to tell Lucy. Phil couldn't have been that far behind them so she'd be there any minute and she'd want to know what was wrong with her daddy. She would have seen them loading him into the ambulance from the car and Bella just had no idea what she could say. How do you tell a five year old that her daddy was hurt very badly and you had no idea if he was going to pull through it or not?

Lucy was too bright and observant to be fobbed off with comforting lies for long, and she'd work out it was bad just from looking at Bella anyway. The only thing she could do was hope Phil had already explained it to her or that Carlisle would have some answers for them soon and know what to say.

"Bella?" Sally's voice drifted through the sound of the running water breaking Bella from her thoughts once more and making her realise she must have already been in the shower for a while. "I've got a towel and some scrubs here, I'll just leave them by the door for you. Are you ok?"

"Thank you, I'll be out in a minute." She called back not wanting to cause Sally to worry about her but unable to say she was ok when she felt like no matter how hard she tried to pull herself together she was still falling apart right along with Edward. Even breathing felt hard and painful and an ache had taken up residence in her heart the moment his heart had stopped in the ambulance. She wouldn't be ok again until she knew he was going to get better.

"Ok, I'll wait in the main room so I can show you where the relatives' waiting room is." Sally responded and after Bella waited to hear her walk away she turned the shower off and stepped out to find the towel and scrubs neatly folded up on the floor next to where she'd left the remains of her clothing.

She felt a little better being clean. A little more with it than the shocked mess she'd been on entering the hospital although she was still far from her normal self. Even so, Sally seemed to see the small difference as she smiled when Bella appeared from the shower cubicles.

"That better?" She asked so Bella nodded while noticing that Sally was carrying a clear plastic bag containing her jeans and t-shirt.

"I'll leave these in Dr. Cullen's office for you. I'm sure he won't mind and I doubt you'll be needing them any time soon." Sally commented seeing what had drawn her attention. Bella thanked her again before following her silently to what Sally announced was the relatives' room. It was empty at that moment leaving Bella to pick a chair in the far corner to curl up in as she waited for news. Sally left her but returned shortly afterwards with a very sweet cup of tea which she directed Bella to drink before excusing herself to get back to her patients.

With each sip of the too sweet tea Bella felt a little more herself. The daze was defiantly starting to dissipate but that just allowed her to picture what had actually been wrong with Edward more clearly rather than just being stuck with the sound of the alarms going off and the image of the paramedic fighting to keep his heart going. From having watched the paramedic working, she was pretty sure his leg was broken and there seemed to have been something wrong with his knee. The tube they'd had to insert into his chest to get him breathing suggested it was likely his ribs had been damaged again, his shoulder had definitely been dislocated once more and his face had been a swollen, bruised mess making him almost unrecognizable if it hadn't have been for his distinctive hair. With all that going on, even if he did pull through it was going to be a long recovery, and that was just what she'd seen. She had no idea what was going on internally and somehow she didn't think his injuries would be straight forward, especially not the abdominal one. That had been brutal and to skewer something like a chair leg through him, the force used had to have been tremendous and there was just no way that wouldn't cause problems. The more she thought about it, it didn't seem surprising he'd already crashed twice. In fact what was more surprising was that he'd held on for as long as he had. She knew his body had still been weaker than most, something which James probably knew considering he'd gone for his ribs and shoulder again.

The thought of James was startling enough to make her stop picturing Edward's injuries. She'd managed not to think about him since reading his name on Edward's kitchen floor and the reminder made her wonder why Edward would have struggled to do that. The only reason she could see for it would be to leave some kind of proof as to who had attacked him and it made her feel sick as she realised that he must have known he might not make it if he'd thought the written message would be needed.

The thought of him lying there on his own and in pain, thinking he was dying was too much. Rising to her feet Bella started to pace while wiping angrily at the tears that had started to fall again. She felt sick, worried, upset and angry and it was all just too much. Wrapping her arms around herself in a vain attempt at keeping herself together she tried to think of anything other than Edward, eventually settling on how much she hated James. The anger was easier to handle than anything else she was feeling so she let it consume her as she paced. She hoped the police had caught him and that he'd tried to resist arrest. She knew how the police worked, and if he'd resisted, they'd have used force to take him down and she so hoped they had. It wouldn't be enough, nothing would, but it would give him a small taste of his own actions.

She was still imaging him running from the police only for them to catch up to him and use their tazers, or maybe even shoot at him when the door to the relatives' room burst open. Looking up she stopped pacing as she saw Phil come through with Anna and Lucy. Lucy was pale, and her eyes were red and watery but when she saw Bella she ran towards her so Bella scooped her into her arms, finding it oddly comforting to have her there.

"Where's Daddy?" Lucy asked as soon as she was settled in Bella's arms reminding Bella that she hadn't yet worked out what she was going to say to her. Glancing at Phil she saw him subtly shake his head to indicate he hadn't told her anything and she panicked a little before deciding to just go with the truth as much as she could.

"He's being looked after by Carlisle right now."

"Can I see him?" Lucy asked hopefully only to be disappointed when Bella shook her head.

"Not right now. Carlisle will come and get us when we can." She told her, feeling her eyes burn with the effort of holding back the tears as Lucy's face crumbled back into worried disappointment.

"What's wrong with him?" She asked quietly and Bella could hear the wobble in her voice showing the effort Lucy was putting into not crying as well. If Lucy could be strong she had to find some way to do the same.

"I don't know yet but he's in good hands. Carlisle will look after him for us." Bella tried to comfort her and Lucy let it drop as she buried her face into Bella's neck. It was obvious she was still upset but Bella was just thankful she'd dropped the questions there. It did make her wonder if Lucy understood more of what was going on than she'd thought though as her usual inquisitiveness wasn't normally so easily settled, it was almost like she knew she wouldn't like the answers so she hadn't asked the questions. That thought just made Bella hug her tighter.

"I'm going to ring Renee if you're ok with Anna and Lucy for a minute or two." Phil commented, glad to see Bella looking a little more composed than she'd been the last time he'd seen her. Her eyes were still red from crying but he could see a little of her usual resolve back in her eyes and he knew now she had Lucy to focus on it would help. She nodded in response and retreated to her chair, patting the one next to her for Anna to jump onto while Lucy remained in her arms. Happy that they all seemed calm for the moment Phil quickly left as the sooner Renee got there and they could get Anna home the better. He'd seen all the police milling around and knew the questions would be starting soon, that, along with waiting for news on Edward was going to make a stressful evening and while he intended to stay around for Bella and the police he knew it would be better for Renee to take Anna home. She didn't need to see everyone upset and it would be easier for Bella with just Lucy to concentrate on.

"How was school you two?" Bella asked quietly once the door had swung closed behind Phil. She could see Anna was already fidgeting and while she didn't expect Lucy to answer, conversation had to be better than silence. She didn't want her to be stuck dwelling on how Edward was, Bella was doing enough of that for the both of them.

"Same as always." Anna shrugged which made Bella roll her eyes automatically.

"Uhuh, what did you do?" She tried again, nudging Anna with her elbow and looking pointedly at her before tilting her head towards Lucy in an attempt to convey to her what she was trying to do. They were best friends; surely if anyone could distract Lucy right then Anna ought to have had a chance at it.

"Maths, reading, gym." Anna answered simply, apparently totally missing Bella's plea for help.

"What did you do in gym?" Bella prodded hoping Anna would catch on eventually if she kept trying.

"Played rounders." Anna answered bluntly.

"That sounds fun." Bella encouraged but Anna shook her head making Bella sigh as it was clear they were getting nowhere.

"Not really." She huffed before she swivelled in her seat so she was sitting cross legged facing Bella and Lucy. Lucy still had her face buried into Bella's neck and Anna didn't really understand what was going on. "Why's Lucy so sad?"

"Because her daddy isn't very well right now. We should talk about something else." Bella answered, well aware of Lucy's grip around her neck tightening as she spoke.

"Oh. Does that mean we have to make cards again?" Anna asked, remembering when Lucy's daddy had been unwell before.

"If you wanted to." Bella answered a little reluctantly wondering why Anna was so happy to bring things up that would only upset Lucy further yet couldn't have a nice conversation about school. Lucy always managed to make their days sound really fun and full when she filled Edward in at the end of each day.

"Will Lucy be staying with us again? We could use the art kit I got for my birthday." Anna suggested and Bella noticed Lucy lifted her head up a little at the suggestion.

"I don't know but that's a good idea. What other things could you do if Lucy stayed with us?" Bella encouraged Anna as although she had no idea if Lucy would stay with them, Emmett or Esme and Carlisle if Lucy was showing a little interest in the idea it was worthwhile talking about. Anna was all too happy to run with it, suggesting various ideas that all seemed to have something to do with her birthday presents but Lucy continued to listen and though she still wasn't happy, her mood did seem to lighten a little.

Phil returned to the room midway through Anna listing the movies they could watch and looked to Bella with a questioning gaze. She just shrugged a little and nodded to Lucy who was still paying attention to Anna and even adding a few things here and there and Phil noticed the improvement so didn't interrupt them and instead just lifted Anna up to sit on his knee as he stole her chair and joined in once he gathered what the conversation was about.

The girls were starting to get hungry by the time they'd exhausted their plans for things to do at Anna's house so Phil suggested he take them to the canteen but Lucy refused to leave Bella and Bella didn't want to leave the relatives' room in case there was some news about Edward so he took Anna with him to help choose some snacks to bring back up.

Left on their own Lucy looked up at Bella and noticed the strange clothes she was wearing. She could clearly remember her being in her usual jeans and hoodie outfit when she'd arrived at the school gates and now she was wearing a baggy pale pink top and matching trousers which Lucy recognised as being similar to what the nurses had worn the last time her daddy had been in hospital.

"Why are you wearing funny clothes?" She asked, fingering the neck line of the top and drawing Bella's attention to it.

"Oh, urm, I spilt some coffee down myself when I first got here. One of the nurses was kind enough to lend me this to change into." She offered lamely. It hadn't occurred to her before that Lucy would ask about her clothing so she hadn't been prepared to lie about it but there was no way she could tell Lucy she'd had to change because she was covered in Edward's blood.

Lucy studied her for a moment, able to tell she was lying but unsure as to why as considering what else was going on she didn't think clothing would be important enough to lie about. She could tell Bella was watching her anxiously though so she decided not to question it any further as she trusted Bella and just like she knew her daddy sometimes pretended about things being ok for her sake she could tell Bella was trying to do the same.

"I want my daddy." She mumbled instead, feeling the ache of him not being there when she was scared. Bella helped a little but nothing was the same as a hug from her dad.

"Oh Luce I know you do, I do too but we'll just have to wait." Bella sighed, kissing the top of her head and wishing there was something she could do to make her feel better. Short of Edward strolling through the door with a smile on his face and no visible wounds though she knew nothing could do that.

The door opened again and Bella looked up, hopeful that it would be Carlisle as there hadn't been enough time for Phil and Anna to be back from the canteen but she was disappointed to see Emmett enter.

"Hey you two." He greeted them as he wandered in before flopping down into one of the chairs near them. He sounded tired and worried and looked it too with his tie missing, jacket crumpled in his hand and his shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. "Has there been any news?"

"Not yet. Carlisle's in with him." Bella answered before wondering how he'd known to turn up there, "Did the hospital call you?"

"No. The police turned up at the office and arrested the guy from IT who was meant to be fixing my computer then told me I should get down here. They filled me in with what they knew on the way down and I called Esme. Is she here yet?" He replied, looking around like he expected her to suddenly appear.

"No, as far as I know it's just us, Phil and Anna here right now." Bella responded wondering briefly if they ought to call anyone else. Alice would probably want to be there but Emmett distracted her from the thought.

"Ok. So do you know what's actually going on? They told me what they knew of Edward's condition but wouldn't explain anything else." He asked thinking that if Bella was there already she had to know something.

"It was James. I was meant to pick Lucy up from school but they made me late and Victoria was there. Phil turned up so we managed to get there in time but it looks like it was all just part of the plan to isolate Edward. The IT guy was probably making sure you were home late." She answered quietly trying not to pique Lucy's interest too much although she knew she'd be listening.

"I knew there was something not right with him and I bet that's where my phone went. I've been looking for it all afternoon. Something went wrong with my computer after lunch and it was going to make me late home. I wanted to call Edward and tell him but I couldn't find it anywhere." He muttered, annoyed at himself for not taking notice when he'd felt something was off with Laurent.

"Least that explains why there was no answer when I tried to ring you earlier." Bella commented although it was a little too late for explanations now. The damage had already been done.

"So Victoria was at the school?" Emmett questioned after a moment's silence having let everything sink in a little and realising how disturbing that thought was.

"She tried to make me leave with her." Lucy answered him quietly, drawing his attention to her for the first time. He could see how scared she was and he hated to see her looking so sad. She'd had to go through way too much for someone so young.

"Are you ok Luce?" He questioned, feeling a hint of the same panic Bella had at the idea of Victoria getting her hands on her even though he could see she was safely with them. She nodded but didn't say anything, leaving it to Bella to elaborate as she buried her face back into Bella's neck.

"Victoria didn't get anywhere. Lucy kicked up an epic tantrum, causing enough fuss that she couldn't get out before the rest of the parents and teachers realised something was wrong. They were holding her while waiting for the police to arrive when we left."

"Good on you Luce!" Emmett cheered, trying to find something of his usual joyful enthusiasm for her even though he was still worried. "Thwarting Victoria is going to be worth at least five ice creams I think...though not all at once."

That earned him a small smile from Lucy as she turned her head a little to see him again but it soon vanished as not even the promise of ice cream could distract from what was going on.

"Why's Carlisle taking so long?" She complained. The last time he'd been in the hospital she'd been allowed to see him as soon as they'd got there. She didn't like all the waiting. If her daddy was hurt he needed her there with him.

"Your daddy's very ill right now Luce. It might be a while yet." Bella responded awkwardly seeing she was starting to get impatient and unable to fault her for it. She was just as anxious to see him or at least hear some news of how he was doing herself.

"He will be ok won't he?" Lucy asked, hearing what Bella wasn't saying in the tone of her voice and feeling the hold on her tears weaken a little. She was trying to be brave for her daddy like Bella had asked but it was hard and she just wanted to see him so badly.

"I'm sure he will." Bella responded but she glanced at Emmett as she did and he saw the truth in her eyes. He didn't know the full details, all the police had been able to tell him was that he'd been seriously beaten but seeing the fear in Bella it made it clear that he was worse than he'd thought. That wasn't something Lucy needed to know though.

"Don't worry Luce, your dads a fighter, just like you." He added, hoping to draw Lucy's attention away from Bella a little and help comfort her. Nothing else was said then until Phil and Anna returned with food. That distracted them all for a little while and since Lucy was occupied Emmett took the opportunity to pull Phil and Bella away to the other end of the room to try and find out just what they were dealing with.

"What's really going on? Just how bad is Edward?" He asked, not liking the way Phil and Bella looked to each other before Phil sighed and answered.

"He's not good. He stopped breathing before the ambulance arrived and he was losing a lot of blood from an abdominal wound."

"But they got him breathing again right?" Emmett asked anxiously.

"Yes but his heart stopped just before we got here. They were still trying to resuscitate him the last I saw him." Bella answered quietly, wrapping her arms around herself again as she felt the ache in her chest throb. Emmett paled as her words sunk in before she saw him rally and hope sparked in his eyes.

"They must have succeeded right? Otherwise they would have told us by now." He commented hoping that the old saying of no news is good news was ringing true for them right then. There were murmurs of agreement from both Phil and Bella but the doubt was still there for all of them. There had to be a limit to what Edward's body could take and after he asked a few more questions about Edward's injuries, Emmett started to worry they may have found it. By the end of the conversation he half wished he hadn't asked anything and he felt distinctly ill as he left the relatives' room in search of someone who could give them an update, even if it was just to tell him if he was still breathing or not.

Renee arrived in a whirlwind not long after, carrying a bag of clean clothes for Bella and pulling her into a hug the moment she set eyes on her.

"How's Edward? Are you ok? I know I'm here to take Anna home but we can stay if you need me. I bought you some clean clothes, Phil said you needed them." She rattled off almost too fast to distinguish before she spotted Lucy sitting in the seat next to Bella and let go of her to hug Lucy instead. "Oh honey, you poor thing."

"We don't know how Edward is, Emmett's trying to find out and the rest of us are fine. You don't need to stay, I'm pretty sure Anna would be happier at home and thanks for the clothes." Bella answered all her questions looking over to where Anna was curled up with Phil and beginning to look a little bored while being aware that Renee's attempt at comforting Lucy was only reminding her of what was wrong.

"Ok, but you ring me as soon as there's news! And if you need anything just ask and I'll be here." Renee responded, relinquishing Lucy back into Bella's arms as she moved over to Phil and Anna, talking quietly to Phil before taking Anna from him, leaving just as quickly as she'd arrived.

Esme was the next to arrive at the relatives' room but she was followed by someone no one had expected to see there. Even though Bella had never met her before there was no mistaking the woman for anyone other than Edward's mother as the resemblance between her as Esme was startling. The fact Lucy visible bristled and glared at her just added to that certainty.

"She shouldn't be here." She hissed to Bella although it carried to everyone else in the room and while Esme looked to Lucy apologetically, Elizabeth looked hurt.

"Lucy, she just wants to see how he is." Esme tried to explain gently although she couldn't blame Lucy for her reaction. She'd tried to make Elizabeth stay away but she'd been determined and in the end she was his mother. She didn't want to keep the pair of them apart but she also didn't want to see Edward hurt again. It had been an awkward decision but in the end she'd decided to give her sister the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she'd finally seen what was really important.

"She's mean to Daddy." Lucy complained but they were saved from trying to make her relent as Emmett reappeared and was immediately pounced on by her.

"How's Daddy?" She asked, pulling out of Bella's arms and running towards him.

"He's doing ok right now but he's still very poorly and we won't be able to see him for a while. He's in surgery." He responded, spotting his mother standing there and eyeing her warily

"What's surgery?" Lucy asked still looking anxious so Emmett picked her up.

"It means that Carlisle is working extra hard to fix him back to normal for you. He has to concentrate so we have to stay here until he's finished." He explained hoping that would be enough for her and it seemed to be as she sighed and leant her head on his shoulder.

"Carlisle? He's the one operating?" Esme asked, stunned that her husband would have put himself in that position although it shouldn't really have surprised her. Still she hoped nothing went wrong for both his and Edward's sakes. She knew Carlisle would never be able to forgive himself if it did.

"I think so, he's definitely involved anyway." Emmett answered before turning his attention to his mother, "What are you doing here?"

"I was with Esme when you called. I had to come." She answered uncomfortably under the stares of everyone in the room. Emmett could see how awkward she felt there but he wasn't going to just let her off the hook because she was his mother. Edward was what was important and after all the times he'd already failed his brother he wasn't going to just let his parents turn up and hurt him again.

"Why now?" He asked coldly, letting her know she wasn't really welcome there.

"You know I never agreed with your father. It sounded serious, I needed to be here." She pleaded but that wasn't enough.

"He knows about this you know. Was standing there when they told me I needed to come down here. Do you know what he did? Just stood there with a cold, disapproving frown on his face. What are you going to do when he finds out where you are?" He asked harshly.

"I don't know." She answered quietly, avoiding looking at them all as she fiddled with the strap on her handbag. She hadn't really thought it through. All she'd seen was the look on Esme's face letting her know just how serious things were and she'd had to be there. As Esme had reminded her, Edward was her son and she really did care even if things did get in the way. She just had to be there.

"Then I suggest you leave right now. Edward does not need you messing him around." Emmett stated. The last thing they needed was Edward Senior turning up at the hospital and causing a scene demanding that she leave and he knew all too well just how obediently Elizabeth followed her husband's commands. It was better if she'd never been there at all than having come and left.

"I've no intention of doing that. I just need to know he's ok. If he doesn't want to see me I'll go." She argued having known all along it was unlikely he'd want to see her. She just had to know he was ok. Then she could leave and know he was in good hands as she knew Esme and Carlisle would look after him well.

"I'm pretty sure he won't want you here." Emmett responded but he didn't have the heart to actually make her leave as she was still their mother and she did look genuinely concerned so he just sat down to begin the wait for news all over again.

It was a tense wait in the relatives' room after that. Bella and Lucy sat with Phil while Esme and Elizabeth sat at the opposite side of the room and Emmett hovered in between apparently unable to sit still. The police finally interrupted their silence, taking them out one at a time to question. Bella told them everything she knew about what had been happening right from the start but when she asked what was going on they wouldn't tell her anything and everyone else reported the same thing as they each returned to the relatives' room. By the end of it they were all left confused, and Lucy had reverted back to tears after they'd had to ask her what had happened at the school gates.

It was only then the police relented and explained what they knew. They all listened in confused shock as the detective in charge explained that Riley had called in an anonymous tip off to the emergency services then turned himself and the rest of them in just after they'd picked Victoria up from the school. That was how they'd known what to expect and why they'd picked Laurent up. What they'd all said corresponded with what Riley had already told them. The only problem with the whole thing was they hadn't managed to find James yet.

"There will be police stationed here until we catch him. Riley thinks he's likely to turn up here so just keep your eyes open and if any of you see any sign of him alert us immediately. I'm sure I don't need to tell you that he's dangerous and shouldn't be approached." The detective ended his speech before leaving them in peace to worry over that piece of disconcerting news.

It wasn't long after that before Garrett turned up, having also been questioned by the police and making his way there as soon as he'd given his statement triggering Emmett to call Alice when he realised that everyone else who knew Edward was already there and knowing Alice would never forgive him if he didn't give her the chance to be there if something bad happened. When she arrived both Jasper and Peter were with her and they settled in to join the wait for news on Edward making it a little easier on them all as they'd thought to bring some toys and colouring books for Lucy and everyone relaxed a little as they watched her get distracted.

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><p>It had been a harrowing couple of hours.<p>

No matter what Carlisle had thought he'd been walking into when he'd entered the E.R. it was nothing compared to what actually greeted him. Edward had been a mess, barely hanging on by a thread as they fought to catch up with his body as it failed. They'd needed every set of hands they'd had and even then it had been close.

The ribs that had been broken before had fractured again, the force used being enough to send one of the splintered ends into his lung. That had caused his lung to collapse and had then resulted in a tension pneumothorax which had caused the first respiratory arrest back at his flat. If it hadn't been for Phil's CPR efforts then they would have lost him then but luckily he'd given the paramedics enough time to carry out the needle decompression to get him breathing again.

That however had turned out to be the least of their problems as when he'd walked in Edward had been bleeding out. The wooden pole that had been plunged into his abdomen had ruptured his spleen causing massive blood loss. They'd had to remove it but that wasn't without its risks as he'd now be more susceptible to infection, something he'd already been suffering with and given the new and old problems with his lungs they were going to have to monitor him very closely.

Edward's injuries didn't even stop there though. He had a nasty fracture in his tibia and his knee cap that would put him in a cast for a while and strip what little independence he'd managed to claw back over the last couple of weeks as his shoulder was also dislocated and would have to be kept restricted in a sling while it healed.

Of course, that was all assuming he pulled through to get to the point of healing. It was still very touch and go, he'd lost a lot of blood and they'd have to ventilate him while they kept him in a medicated coma as on top of everything else there was some swelling around his brain that they needed to go down before they could let him wake and they couldn't tell if that would cause any lasting damage until he was awake again.

All in all Carlisle wouldn't be able to relax until Edward was awake and now he had to find some way to explain it all to the rest of the family.

Opening the door to the relatives' room he was met by ten pairs of worried but hopeful eyes and was just glad he had some relatively good news to share.

"He's out of surgery and in the intensive care unit." He announced while holding his hand out to Esme. She took it and let him pull her into a hug, seeing how exhausted he was and understanding just how difficult the last few hours would have been for him.

"He's ok?" She asked tentatively recognizing the stress in his eyes and slight frown.

"For now but he's still not totally in the clear. We'll just have to wait and see." He answered truthfully. "He's in a pretty bad state."

"Can I see him?" Lucy asked eagerly, fighting free of Bella's arms to get to her feet and across to Carlisle. They'd all said she could see her daddy when Carlisle arrived and he was there now.

"You can but he's asleep and he's going to stay that way for a while. You can sit with him though and talk to him." He answered before opening the door again to lead them all to Edward's room. He knew they'd all have a lot more questions to ask but he really didn't want to explain anything else while Lucy was there. As soon as she was settled in the chair by Edward's bed the rest of them would be free to talk.

When they reached Edward's room Carlisle paused to warn Lucy about what she was about to see. Edward was badly bruised and hooked up to more machines than he had been the last time she'd seen him in hospital. It was likely to be scary for her but he assured her that it was still her daddy and that all the equipment was just there to help him and the bruises would heal. She just nodded along to everything he was saying, too eager to see him to really pay attention and they were all greeted with her tears when Carlisle opened the door and she got her first glimpse of just how bad he looked.

As strong as she always was though so didn't fall into hysterics and instead just asked if they could move the chair by his bed closer and when Carlisle obliged she asked if she could hold Edward's hand to which he nodded and explained it would be fine so long as she was careful not to dislodge any of the tubes that were inserted there.

Seeing that she was settled and ok once she could hold Edward's hand Carlisle herded the rest of them back into the corridor so he could explain everything where they could still keep an eye on her through the window as it was going to take a while.

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><p>Bella sat in the chair by Edward's bed just watching him. If she hadn't seen him in the ambulance it would have been upsetting to see him with all the machines surrounding him and the bruises dark on his pale skin but as it was she was just relieved to see his chest rising with each breath and hear the steady bleeping of his heart monitor.<p>

It had been a long day and she knew she should have gone home for some proper rest like everyone else had but she'd promised Lucy she'd stay with Edward. Esme and Carlisle had taken her back to their house, Emmett and Alice also in tow as no one had wanted to return to Edward's flat knowing the mess that awaited them there and Alice had refused to go home after Emmett had filled her in on their father's reaction to the news Edward was in hospital. Lucy hadn't wanted to leave Edward on his own and had been even more adamant that they couldn't leave him with Elizabeth who was still in the hospital refusing to leave so Bella had promised she would stay. It hadn't been a hard promise to make as she'd been just as reluctant to leave him so she'd happily taken up residence in the chair next to his bed, taking over the hand holding duty from Lucy and finally able to breathe properly again.

Now as she sat there, she could feel her eyes drooping as the exhaustion started to take over. She'd never been so scared in her life as she had been in the hours after getting home from college. For an hour or two she'd even been convinced he wasn't going to make it despite Carlisle's best efforts. He'd explained all of Edward's injuries to them as she knew he had a long road ahead of him to recover but she was confident he could make it now even if it was apparent Carlisle was still worried. He'd fought through the worst of it and she just knew he wouldn't give up now and it was that belief that let her fall into an uneasy sleep.

Bella jerked awake a while later to a dark room unsure as to what had woken her. The bleeps from Edward's heart monitor were still in a nice steady rhythm and she could hear the hisses of the ventilator so it wasn't anything to do with Edward and she'd just put it down to a bad dream when the light in the room flicked on. She looked up, squinting through the harsh light expecting to see a nurse or doctor doing their rounds only to see James standing at the end of Edward's bed instead.

He was dressed in stonewashed jeans and a baggy black hoodie, the hood pulled up over his head instead of his usual leather jacket but she could see the tape and bruising around his nose and knew just from his stance that it was him.

Lurching from her chair she reached for the panic button but James was just too fast and had one arm around the top of her chest and the other around her waist allowing him to pull her back before she could reach it.

"I don't think we'll be doing that." He commented quietly as he adjusted his grip slightly and she became aware of the feel of cold sharp steal against her throat.

"You'll not get away with this. There's police all over this place." She told him feeling the anger welling up again.

"Oh I know, that little turn coat that calls himself my brother made sure of that but I figure if I'm going down for it I may as well make sure I got the job done properly." James responded while loosening his grip a little but still keeping the knife held against her skin, "Now you have a choice to make. You can either leave here quietly and let me get on with it or I can go through you. It's up to you, makes no difference to me."

At that moment Bella realised James had made his second mistake of the day. The first had been trusting Riley, the second was underestimating her and her feelings for Edward. He thought she was just a weak, fragile girl he could scare into walking away and was holding her as such. His grip on her wasn't quite as tight as it should have been if he was trying to immobilize her and it was almost like he was just holding her mockingly knowing he'd already won and there was nothing she could do about it. Obviously he hadn't done his research thoroughly enough though as she was the daughter of a police officer and there was enough anger and adrenaline in her system that she wasn't just going to roll over and let James get his way.

No, James had made a serious mistake when he underestimated her and she was going to enjoy proving that to him.

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><p><em>AN - Had some problems getting this chapter written, wasn't sure I'd manage to post it today so I hope you enjoyed it. Not sure if next weeks chapter will get posted on Saturday or not either as it'll be my birthday so I might not get chance. I will get it up as soon as I can if I do miss Saturday though.<em>

_Thanks again to everyone who continues to read, review, favourite and alert :)_


	39. Chapter 37 Surprise Defeat

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 37 – Surprise Defeat<strong>

Bella reached up to grip the wrist of the hand holding the knife to her throat at the same time as she threw her elbow back, connecting with James' gut and succeeding in winding him if the gasp of air he let out was anything to go by. Before he had chance to react she stamped down as hard as she could on his foot and felt his grip on her weaken slightly as he cursed. Just before he managed to get his hold back properly she shot her fist back and up, solidly hitting his nose.

"You bitch!" He yelled as he tried to pull the knife closer to her throat but her grip was firm so he only managed to knick her skin as she turned in his arms and brought her knee up, hitting him at his weakest point, causing him let go of the knife as he automatically clutched at himself and fell to his knees. Knowing she only had a couple of minutes before he'd be back on his feet she ran for the panic button and managed to press it just as James grabbed her ankle, pulling her onto the floor along with him. He tried to get the advantage by pinning her down, but his nose was bleeding and the pain from that and his groin was enough to distract him so as she continued to struggle he couldn't get a firm enough grip on her.

At the same moment they both spotted the knife lying on the floor and reached for it, Bella being slightly closer got her fingers around the handle first but James wasn't giving up. He grabbed her wrist, his grip strong and unrelenting as she tried to turn and lift her arm, his weight making it impossible. Crying out in frustration she wondered where the police had got to and why the nurses who should have come to investigate the panic call hadn't arrived yet.

Pinned to the floor on her back with James hovering over her, holding her arm and the knife well out of harm's way she started to think she was trapped especially when James switched to using his weight to pin her down, freeing up a hand to go for her throat. She was small enough that with just the one hand he was able to get a choking grip and she wasn't sure how long she'd be able to hold onto the knife when he started cutting off her air supply but then the door opened and as James looked up, moving back up onto his knees to be able to make a quick getaway if needed, she took his moment of distraction and used it to her advantage, lifting her knee up once more, easily connecting with his groin again and wriggling out from underneath him just before he fell back down.

It was her turn to pin him then as she scrambled over the top of him to straddle his waist and got a firmer grip on his knife, holding it underneath his throat as she pulled his head up using his hair to keep him in place while she tried to catch her breath. It was only then she looked up to see Elizabeth standing in the doorway, her mouth open in shock and her eyes wide.

"Get the police!" She shouted hoarsely, frustrated that Elizabeth was just standing there and trying to ignore the burn in her throat. She could feel blood trickling down her neck now she was still and she didn't know how long she'd be able to hold James. She hadn't cared about the knife at her throat so she doubted he would either and she was certain she wouldn't have enough weight to be able to hold him down once he got past the initial burst of pain. She needed it to be over fast or both she and Edward were in trouble.

"Who'd have guessed a little thing like you would be a fighter?" James commented once Elizabeth left, his voice a little hoarse and Bella hoped it was from pain.

"Dad was a police officer; I've always known the importance of self defence. You should have done your homework better." She spat back at him, unnerved a little as he twisted his head back as much as he could given the grip she had on his hair to look at her with a sleazy smile.

"Seems so. I won't be making the same mistake again that's for sure." He responded lightly.

"True, you'll be locked up. Now shut up or I'll be even more tempted to put this knife to use." She hissed, not liking the way he seemed so calm. Given his position and the fact help was on the way he shouldn't have been calm and it made her really fear what he was planning. She hoped Elizabeth would find help quickly.

"I don't think you would. You're too _good_." He taunted making her lift the knife a little closer to his skin so he'd be able to feel it's touch but it wouldn't break the skin.

"I wouldn't be so sure of that. You tried to kill the man I love." She responded sharply but that just seemed to amuse him.

"Shame you've chosen to waste yourself on him, he's too soft for someone with your fire." James commented and she wondered if the police would buy it as self defence if she did use the knife as she realised he was flirting with her. One glance into his eyes and she could see the fire burning there, she didn't think it was from anger anymore and the way his eyes scanned what he could see of her made her want to get to her feet and go take a shower.

"You make me sick." She hissed at him instead, digging the knife in just a little more as a warning but he just laughed.

"You know, some would call this foreplay." He said and as much as it freaked her out she couldn't help but wonder how he could find it all a turn on when she had to have hurt him. The thought distracted her just enough that she let the knife drop just a touch but that turned out to be all James had been waiting for as he chose that moment to suddenly buck underneath her causing her to lose her balance. Her arms flailed as she felt herself falling backwards and James managed to dodge them as he rolled over onto his back. He was still underneath her as her hands landed, the one that had been holding his hair hitting his thigh which he could have easily knocked away but the one holding the knife was the one that took the brunt of her weight as she managed to steady herself.

It wasn't until she heard his pained cry that she realised just where her hand had landed and what was still held in it at the time.

The knife was sharp enough that with the weight of it in her hand giving it enough momentum, when her hand met the resistance it needed to steady her, the knife sliced straight through James' jeans and anchored itself into his flesh as if they were made from nothing more than butter. Hesitantly, she turned to see what she'd done, finding the knife buried in his groin.

Horrified, she let go of the handle, leaving it to protrude gruesomely from its spot as she moved away from James, fairly certain he wouldn't be getting up by himself any time soon.

"Still think its foreplay?" She found herself asking as she stared down at him and she saw his eyes flash but he stayed quiet for once as at that moment the door flew open again and a collection of nurses and police swarmed in, followed by Edward's doctor and Elizabeth. They took one startled look around the room before everyone flew into action, the nurses and doctor surrounding James as the police hovered awkwardly.

During the commotion Bella collapsed back into her chair, pulling her knees up so her feet rested on it and she could wrap her arms around her legs as she shook. Dropping her head down onto her knees she could feel tears threatening again as she tried not to watch what was going on in the room before she jumped as someone lightly pressed a hand to her shoulder.

"Are you ok?"

She looked up to see Elizabeth standing next to her looking concerned and a little wary as she watched her although Bella noticed she kept glancing to Edward who was still lying peacefully unaware in his medicated coma beside them.

"He didn't hurt me." She murmured before feeling the blood on her neck again and the burn in her throat as she tried to speak, "Well not much anyway."

"You should let someone look at that." Elizabeth commented pointing to the bleeding wound but Bella shook her head as she didn't want to leave her chair. She wanted to be able to see Edward and know he was ok after once again coming too close to losing him. If James hadn't made the mistake of underestimating her, he never would have given her enough leeway to fight back and it would all have been over.

"She's right, that does need looked at." A new voice joined in and she looked up again to see the detective she'd spoken to earlier standing in the doorway. She wished she could remember his name. "I'll need to ask you some questions again I'm afraid."

"Can you do that here?" She asked quietly really hoping they wouldn't make her leave Edward. With the adrenaline wearing off what she'd just done was really starting to hit her and it didn't help that James had managed to totally gross her out with his lewd comments and glance. She was starting to feel glad the knife had landed where it had as at least it ought to put a dampener on whatever thoughts he'd been having but the fact she'd used the knife at all made her feel a little sick. While she'd been willing to defend Edward and herself she had never dreamt it would go that far, she'd just wanted to get free long enough to call for help.

"I think that would be ok. Let's just get someone to take a look at you first though ok?" He responded realising how shaken she was before looking back out at the rest of the room and seeing what all the medical staff there were doing, wincing when he saw just where the knife had landed, "They all seem to be a little busy here right now, nice job by the way."

"That was an accident." She muttered but seeing the way the detective was smiling a little she couldn't help but feel a brief flicker of pride at what her lack of balance had caused.

"Well I'm glad it was an accident in your favour. I'm sorry it got to that point though, the officer who was meant to be guarding the door left his post. He'll be hearing about that I assure you." The detective responded, his displeasure in his men obvious in his tone. "If you'll just excuse me a minute I need to make sure they don't let him disappear and I'll get someone to come take a look at you."

With that he moved back over to the group surrounding James and Bella looked away and back to Edward, not wanting to see the result of what she'd been forced to do anymore. It was a little disconcerting to know she'd stabbed someone, even if it was James.

"Was that the man who did this to Edward?" Elizabeth asked softly once the room had cleared of everyone else, James having been loaded onto a stretcher to transport him to a different part of the hospital.

"Yup. He's Lucy's Uncle." Bella offered in explanation as she watched Elizabeth hover by the end of Edward's bed. She kept reaching out like she wanted to touch him only to snatch her hand back and grip onto the bed instead. "Why are you here? Not that I'm not grateful for you helping with James but I thought Emmett made it pretty clear you were to stay away."

"I know and I tried to. I just wanted to see him. I wasn't planning to come in, I just...I needed to see that he was ok before I could go and I assumed everyone would have gone home by now." She answered hesitantly.

"I promised Lucy I'd stay and I guess it's good you came up here." Bella responded just as awkwardly. She knew Emmett and Lucy wouldn't want Elizabeth to be there, but she had more than likely just saved her and Edward as she wouldn't have been able to get free of James' choking grip if he hadn't been distracted by the opening door and there was something in her expression that made Bella unable to turn her away.

"I can go back to the canteen if you want. Or I could bring you something back up?" Elizabeth offered, fidgeting with her bag strap again as she hovered awkwardly. She didn't want to leave but she knew she had no right to stay and was probably putting Bella in a difficult position if she did.

"No, you're ok for a little while. I'm not sure I want to be on my own just yet anyway." Bella murmured while nodding towards the second chair that was leant against the wall. She'd probably end up regretting it but she figured they could maybe talk a little or something. From everything she'd heard, Elizabeth should never have even turned up at the hospital and she couldn't help being a little curious about it. They'd made her sound heartless but that obviously wasn't the case and while Edward's presence was comforting, he wasn't going to be great company and she was still very shaken.

"Are you sure?" Elizabeth questioned, startled that Bella would even consider letting her stay with what she was sure everyone would have said about her.

"Yes, maybe we can talk a little once that Detective's finished with me." She answered taking Elizabeth by surprise.

"Thank you." She returned reverently making Bella shift a little uncomfortably at just how much the offer seemed to mean to her. It made her stare at her again wondering what was going on inside her head.

"Miss Swan?"

Bella and Elizabeth both looked to the doorway again to see a young doctor standing there looking a little nervous.

"That's me." Bella answered, lifting her head up and weakly waving her hand.

"Detective Jenks asked me to take a look at you." He said stepping into the room and still looking just as nervous and forgetting to introduce himself. Bella couldn't help but wonder if he was always like that or if he'd heard what had just happened. She hoped he had enough of his composure left to do his job.

Luckily as soon as he started to examine her he calmed down and he managed to stitch the cut on her neck and announce no lasting damage had occurred to her throat, it would just be pretty badly bruised and a little painful for a while. Half way through his examination Detective Jenks returned carrying a camera to take photos of Bella's injuries to be used as evidence and after the doctor left the questions started. Bella described what had happened and how they'd ended up the way they had while Detective Jenks listened and took notes. She couldn't tell what he was thinking as she spoke as his face remained blank so by the time she'd finished she was a little worried what would happen.

"So what happens now?" She asked nervously.

"Well, as soon as they've patched Mr Hadrian up we'll take him in. He'll be questioned but we've got more than enough evidence to charge him with attempted murder among other things already." Detective Jenks answered, flipping his note book closed and pocketing it. Looking up he could see how worried she looked and realised that hadn't been totally what she'd meant so hurried to dispel her concerns. She'd already had a rough enough night without spending the rest of it pointlessly worrying. "What happened in this room was clearly self-defence so don't be worrying about it. You did well. Unless you have any other questions I think that's everything for now."

Bella shook her head in response so he stood, said goodbye and left. As soon as he was gone Elizabeth stood and moved closer to Bella. She stalled for a moment once she was close but seeing the way Bella's shoulders were starting to shake she closed the last distance to enclose her in a hug. It was awkward as they didn't know each other, and what Bella did know of Elizabeth wasn't good but after the last hour anyone's arms would have done and Bella ended up clinging on to her as she cried.

"I'm sorry." Bella mumbled once she'd cried it out and was able to pull back, wiping at her eyes as she did.

"Don't apologise. What you did...it was incredibly brave and terrifying. It would be more worrying if you weren't upset by it." Elizabeth answered, smiling softly in an attempt to reassure her although she was sure coming from her it wouldn't be much help. "Would you like me to call someone for you?"

"No," Bella responded, shaking her head. "It's been a long day for everyone, there's no point interrupting their sleep."

"It's been an even longer day for you and I'm sure they wouldn't mind. They'd want to be here for you." Elizabeth commented and Bella was just confused. Sitting there with her right then she could see her as Esme's sister. It was the same comforting nature and it just stuck out as odd when put together with everything she'd heard about Elizabeth.

"Why do you care?" She found herself asking and she didn't miss the brief flash of hurt that flickered into Elizabeth's eyes before she retreated back to her seat, pulling her bag into her lap and once again fidgeting with the strap, twisting it around her fingers as she spoke.

"I know what everyone thinks of me and I can't say they're wrong but that's not all there is to it. I'm not as cold and detached as they all think."

"I don't understand." Bella commented, pulling her feet back onto her chair and wrapping her arms around her knees again. Maybe she was just tired but nothing was really making much sense to her right then.

"It's difficult to explain." Elizabeth sighed but when Bella continued to watch her with a steady gaze she guessed this was one time she could try to explain it and actually be heard. She didn't know if it would do any of them any good but if Bella was willing to listen and it would let her stay in that room with her son just a little longer she decided it was worth it. Looking closely at Bella she could see she probably needed the distraction right then anyway.

"I never actually agreed with Ed but he's not the kind of person you argue with. God knows I tried but it did no good and I wanted to help Edward, more than anything but Ed anticipated that and he cut me off. When I tried to transfer money to his account to see him through until I could figure something else out I couldn't access any of our accounts. Ed then took time off work to stay home, he watched every move we made so there was no way to even try and find Edward or talk to him. There was absolutely no way to reach out to him without Ed finding out and without Ed's backing I had nothing to offer Edward anyway. To help Edward I would have had to leave but I wouldn't have had any money to help him, no job to try and earn an income for him and nowhere to go plus I still had Alice and Emmett to think of as well. Edward had a better chance of succeeding on his own and he did. I know it hasn't been easy for him, I never thought it would be but he got to keep Lucy and I can see he loves her. Ed would have never allowed that. He's a better man than he ever would have been under Ed's care as well. I'm so proud of him, so proud of what he's achieved. He's better off without us and the only reason I seem as detached as I do is it's the only way I can cope with it."

"He's managed, doesn't mean he didn't need his mum though." Bella mumbled, still unable to grasp how she could rationalize what she'd done. If she'd really loved Edward the way a mother should she would have found a way.

"You can't understand without knowing Edward Senior. He's not an easy man to get along with. I fell for him when I was just a teenager and knew no better. He looked after me, made me feel special and gave me a future. It was easy to love him then. When we had children the faults I'd never noticed before started to show through. He was too harsh, too demanding. Everything had to be perfect at all times but it was easier just to follow his rules than to try and fight him. I made so many mistakes but it was far too late to go back on any of it by the time Lucy came along. Maybe if I'd stood up to him more earlier on I could have made a difference but as it was, there was no arguing. We didn't speak for months after that night. We still don't, not the way we used to but no matter his faults, they're mine too and I know that. I'm not here to ask anyone to forgive me, or to give me another chance, I know I don't deserve it but none of that changes the fact I still love my son. I always will love him."

"If you love him so much why do you stay with your husband? It doesn't make sense." Bella interrupted still unconvinced by her speech.

"Because I still love him too and I'm nothing without him. I married him, that's not a commitment I took lightly. I may not like him very much sometimes but he's still my husband and I don't really have much of a choice so I make the best of it." She answered, "Alice and Emmett needed me there too."

"They don't anymore." Bella murmured thinking about how they were both currently staying at Esme's and Carlisle's. They weren't children anymore and that was a poor excuse to stay.

"I know but it's already far too late to change anything now. Besides...where would I go?" Elizabeth responded making Bella wonder if that were true. Glancing to Edward she could remember seeing the pain in his eyes whenever his family was brought to mind and couldn't help but feel he'd still wish for things to be different. Part of his anger and unwillingness to let Emmett help him stemmed from the hurt his parents' lack of interest caused. It wouldn't be easy or quick but Bella had the suspicion that if Elizabeth really wanted another chance with him he'd give it.

"It's never too late." She said but Elizabeth just shook her head sadly.

"For me it is and he's got Esme and Carlisle now, they'll take good care of him. I'll stay till morning then leave. I don't want to cause Edward anymore trouble." She commented, plummeting them into an awkward silence as they both watched Edward.

"Will you be ok? Won't Ed notice you're missing?" Bella asked after a while. Thinking over everything she'd said that night it didn't seem like something he'd take lightly.

"He's probably still at the office. It won't look good to have had one of his staff arrested on the premises. He'll be trying to gloss it all over." Elizabeth responded and Bella could hear just a hint of hatred in her voice.

"He's a lawyer right?" Bella questioned, trying to remember what little she knew of the man and getting a sinking feeling when she realised just what glossing it all over might involve when Elizabeth nodded in confirmation. "He won't try and get Laurent let off will he?"

"No, he wouldn't approve of their methods. He'll just make sure the company isn't dragged into it." She answered and the hatred was more pronounced that time letting Bella see just a little of Esme's spirit once again. It made her wonder what Elizabeth would be like without her husband's influence.

"You should talk to Esme. I meant what I said before about it never being too late. Your family are all here now, not with Ed. Maybe you should join them." Bella commented feeling the truth behind the words as she reached out to reclaim Edward's hand. She still didn't understand her reasoning but she'd seen several glimpses of a different woman hidden behind the cold hearted mask and she knew how much it would mean to Edward to have his real mother back in his life. 

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><p>Bella woke up feeling stiff and sore. Some of it could be attributed to sleeping in an uncomfortable chair but mostly it was the end result of wrestling with James. Her wrist and throat were particularly sore and when she lifted the sleeve of the hoodie Renee had brought in for her there were bruises in the shape of James' fingers marring her pale skin. Letting the sleeve drop back down she wondered if the ones on her throat looked the same and knew if anything they'd probably be even darker. There would certainly be no hiding what had happened from anyone when they came in to visit Edward.<p>

With a sigh she stood and stretched, wincing a little as her muscles protested. She was alone with Edward but as she looked around the room she spotted a carton of orange juice, an apple and a sandwich sitting on the little table by Edward's bed. There was a small piece of paper propped up between the juice and sandwich so she reached out to pick it up finding that the only thing written on it was 'Thank you'. She wasn't sure what Elizabeth was thanking her for but she appreciated the gesture of leaving her breakfast as just the sight of the food alerted her to the fact she was hungry and she really wouldn't have wanted to leave Edward to go in search of something to eat.

She watched Edward as she absently bit into the apple thinking about what could have happened the night before if she hadn't stubbornly decided to stay at the hospital. Everyone other than Lucy had tried to persuade her to go home and get some sleep. She'd been pretty dead on her feet after all the stress and Phil had almost threatened to carry her out of the hospital but in the end she'd managed to convince him that she wouldn't have been able to sleep at home anyway. After spending the afternoon fearing she was going to lose him for good she needed to be able to see him, to see his chest rising and falling with each breath and hear his heart beat steadily on the monitor. Now she was glad she'd felt that way. If James had entered that room to find Edward on his own she was sure they'd have been receiving the call to tell them Edward was dead that morning.

It was an unbearable thought that brought tears back to her eyes and caused her to sit the apple back down so she could slide her chair as close to the bed as possible. Taking hold of his hand again she stroked the small patch of skin that was free from tubes with her thumb before leaning over to kiss it. She still couldn't quite get her head around what she'd been forced to do but faced with the reality that Edward wouldn't be there otherwise she would have done it all over again. With that thought in mind she knew she wouldn't be able to leave that hospital until he was right beside her no matter how illogical or impractical that was. She just had to be able to see him and know he was ok. The police may have got James and the rest of the people involved in his plot to destroy Edward but that didn't mean he didn't have other friends somewhere he could contact.

When Esme and Carlisle burst into Edward's room a while later they found Bella sitting peacefully at his side, running her fingers through his hair absentmindedly as she sipped from the carton of orange juice. She turned to face them as soon as the door opened and while she sat the juice down she didn't remove her hand from Edward's hair.

"Why didn't you call us?" Esme scolded, hurrying across the room to hold her face between her hands as she studied every inch of her closely.

"I didn't want to interrupt anyone's sleep. Yesterday was a long day." Bella answered as from the way Esme was acting and the clinical eye Carlisle was looking at her throat with she assumed someone had told them what had happened in the night.

"You both could have been killed! Sleep wouldn't have mattered, you shouldn't have been on your own all night." Esme insisted, finally letting go of Bella's face and taking a step back to get a better look at the bruises on her throat.

"I wasn't. Elizabeth stayed with me." Bella answered taking them both by surprise as they stared at her.

"Elizabeth? Is she still here?" Esme finally questioned while the lure of Edward's charts called to Carlisle and he wandered over to the end of his bed to lift them out of their holder and take a look.

"I don't think so. She said she'd leave in the morning and I woke up with breakfast beside me and no Elizabeth. You should talk to her. She doesn't seem happy but seems to think she can't change anything." Bella answered having come to the conclusion sometime in the night that she just needed someone to point her in the right direction. She seemed to want to do the right thing, just didn't know how after years of obediently following her husband.

"Talking to her never does any good. She never listens. What was she even doing here? She promised she'd stay away from Edward." Esme asked, a little agitated that after everything that had happened she'd been there when they hadn't.

"Said she just wanted to see him but she heard me and James fighting and came in. It was good that she did, if she hadn't opened the door when she did I don't know what would have happened." Bella responded, unconsciously reaching up to lightly rub at her neck as she thought about the moment she was sure James was going to choke her. Shaking her head she came out of her thoughts to see both Esme and Carlisle staring at her.

"Are you ok?" Carlisle asked as he returned Edward's charts to their place and stepped over to stand beside Esme. Bella nodded but Carlisle wasn't convinced as he looked at her bruising again. "Do you mind if I take a look?"

"Someone looked at me last night, I'm fine." She answered making Carlisle smile a little.

"I know, just humour me. The doctor who treated you was an intern and it was his first shift, I need to make sure he's doing his job correctly." He responded as he already knew all the details of what had happened and who had been seen by who. He'd called the hospital as soon as he'd woken up that morning to find out how Edward had been during the night and the nurse he'd spoken to had been all too eager to fill him in on every detail which was why they'd rushed down to the hospital as soon as they could, leaving Lucy still asleep in bed with Emmett and Alice to look after her and bring her in once she woke up.

"Guess that explains why he seemed so nervous then." She commented as she let Carlisle lightly touch around the bruising.

"How does it feel?" He asked while moving on to peel back the tape that held the dressing over the knife wound.

"A little sore when I talk or swallow but it's not too bad." Bella answered and now she'd mentioned it he could hear the very slight difference in her voice as she spoke. He'd put it down to tiredness initially as it was just a slight gruffness but given the extent of the bruising it didn't surprise him to hear it hurt.

"Well it seems his stitching is up to scratch. Are these your only injuries?" He asked, not seeing anything too concerning. It would all heal easily enough.

"Just my wrist but that's only bruises." She answered, pulling up her sleeve again and holding her arm out towards him so he could see. He frowned as he looked at the perfect depictions of fingers but after a closer feel of it he was satisfied it was just bruises like she'd said.

"Well it looks like you were very lucky." He commented, "How are you feeling about it all?"

"A little weird I guess. I didn't think I'd ever end up stabbing anyone." She mused feeling her stomach roll a little as she said it. She wasn't sure she'd ever really come to terms with that but she wouldn't regret it either. As she looked back to Edward the bruises, ventilator and cast just highlighted the fact James deserved a lot worse than what he'd gotten.

"It was an accident and from what we were told it wasn't even your fault so you shouldn't feel guilty about it but if you ever need to talk you know where to find us. Did you call your mum?" Esme responded, already guessing the answer to her question. In some ways she and Edward were very similar.

"No, she'd only worry and I'm fine." Bella responded confirming Esme's thoughts.

"She'd have a right to worry and she'd want to know whether you're fine or not. You should call her." She stated trying to sound firm but unable to do so when she was still concerned for her. As soon as Carlisle had told them all what had apparently happened they'd all been baffled as to how someone as slight as Bella had managed to overpower James and though she seemed relatively unscathed the worry that had erupted with the news was hard to let go of. Bella should never have been in the position where she'd had to fight James.

"Maybe later. How's Lucy doing?" Bella changed the subject, no longer interested in talking about herself. For the time being she'd have liked to forget what she'd done and she certainly didn't want the fuss Renee was bound to make if she knew what had happened. That could definitely wait a while and she was a little worried how Lucy would have been without Edward having seen how she'd been the last time he was in hospital.

"As well as can be expected. It took a while to get her to sleep but she seemed to like her room. Emmett and Alice will bring her in once she wakes up. We thought she'd be better staying off school for today at least." Carlisle answered seeing that his wife looked like she wanted to argue a little more on the topic of Renee. He knew she was just worried as she cared for Bella but he could also see what Bella was doing and could understand it to some extent. If she wanted a couple of calm hours to let everything settle a little then she was entitled to them. He was sure if she wanted to talk about it or be comforted she'd say something.

"I'm sure Anna will be happy to fill her in on what she misses. What do Edward's charts say? He's ok right?" Bella asked next having seen Carlisle looking at them and feeling a sudden overpowering urge to know just how he was. There'd been no alarms going off during the night and the only times nurses or his doctor had entered seemed to be for routine rounds so nothing appeared to be wrong but they also hadn't told her anything other than he was ok. Carlisle would elaborate if there was anything else there.

"Everything seems to be looking good right now. The first night is always the critical one so the fact he's come through it is a good sign." He answered while looking to his nephew and hoping what he was saying held true. The fact there'd been no problems during the night was good, but there were things that could still go wrong. Even so he was still a little hopeful. Just like Bella had been, he was confident Edward wouldn't have pulled through the worst of it just to leave them all now.

"You should go home and get some proper rest." Esme commented as instead of being able to respond to Carlisle's good news, Bella was overtaken by a yawn. "You look exhausted."

"I'm fine. I want to stay here." She argued even if she did feel tired. It was a little surprising to her how relieved she was to hear from Carlisle that Edward was doing well. She hadn't realised just how much she'd still been worrying and it appeared that worry had been what was keeping her alert.

"Edward will be fine, I've taken some time off work so we'll both be here with him and Emmett, Alice and Lucy will all be here soon." Carlisle joined in trying to persuade her but Bella shook her head, running her fingers through Edward's hair again as she gazed at his face, wishing more than anything that his eyes would open even though she knew they couldn't. There was just no way she could walk away from him.

"I'm staying." 

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><p>"Bella!"<p>

Lucy's call jerked Bella from the doze she'd drifted into making her jump before she blearily opened her eyes enough to see Lucy running towards her.

"Hey Lucy, did you have a nice night at Esme and Carlisle's house?" She asked as she helped Lucy climb onto her knee. A Lucy hug was just what she needed right then and she knew Lucy would want to be as close to Edward as possible. Bella still had the closest chair as Esme and Carlisle sat on the opposite side of his bed where his left hand was hidden away in the sling so not available for holding.

"It was ok, I missed Daddy lots but I have my own room and its pink, just like at home." She answered happily although her gaze was on Edward, cataloguing every visible bruise and cut looking for any changes.

"Your own room? That sounds exciting. Tell me about it?" Bella encouraged, eager to have a happy conversation.

"Everything's pink! And there's loads of toys and dresses and it's huge. Esme says we can get my own things soon as well. There's a room for Daddy right next door too." She answered which made Bella smile even though she wondered just what Esme was planning if she had all that already set up. There was no way she could have set up a room like that for Lucy in just one afternoon which was spent at the hospital.

"That sounds really good, you'll have to show me once your daddy's out of here." She said and Lucy finally dragged her eyes away from her dad to look at Carlisle.

"Is Daddy ok?"

"He's doing well honey but he'll need to sleep for a long while yet." He answered which made her sigh a little as she wanted him awake but she was glad to hear he was doing well. Her curiosity settled for the time being she turned back to Bella and for the first time noticed the bruises and bandage on her neck.

"What happened to you?" She asked, reaching up and letting her fingers hover just above Bella's skin, wanting to touch the marks but not wanting to hurt Bella.

"Nothing much, I'm ok." She answered with a smile, trying to deflect her attention but Emmett had other ideas.

"She's being too modest, Bella's our hero." He told Lucy, "She caught James for the police."

"He was here? You said Daddy was safe!" She shouted, absolutely horrified at what Emmett's comment meant. She knew Bella had stayed at the hospital, so if she'd caught James he had to have been there. They'd promised her he'd be fine if they left.

Alice punched Emmett on the arm while everyone else settled for glaring at him. That wasn't the way they'd wanted to inform Lucy on what had happened and he looked a little sheepish at his mistake.

"He is safe Luce. The police have James and all his friends now. Everything is going to be fine." Bella tried to comfort her but Lucy looked unconvinced as she looked up at her.

"But he hurt you." She mumbled, her voice wavering a little as her eyes started to shine with the threat of tears.

"Not much and he can't do it again, that's what's important." Bella said firmly, willing Lucy to believe her and not get upset. "He didn't get near your daddy, I stopped him."

"You promise? He's not coming back?" She asked looking to Bella for confirmation as she'd been the only one as reluctant to leave the hospital as her the night before. Given how the rest of them had clearly lied she wasn't going to take their word for it but she would trust Bella's judgement.

"I promise and the police are making sure he doesn't." She confirmed and felt Lucy relax again.

"You stopped him?" She asked quietly, studying her carefully as Bella nodded.

"I did." She answered, stroking Lucy's hair back off her face just like Edward usually did, "I won't let anyone hurt your daddy if I can help it."

"Even if you get hurt?" She asked again as she very lightly ghosted her fingers across one of the bruises.

"Even then. He means everything to me Luce, you both do. These mean nothing at all so long as you're both safe." She said pointing to the bruises and hoping Lucy would be reassured. It seemed to work as instead of asking anything else, Lucy cuddled into Bella as she threaded her arms around her waist and let her head rest against her shoulder.

"Love you Bella." She mumbled making Bella look at her in wonder for just a moment as what she'd said resonated within her before she kissed Lucy's head.

"I love you too Luce." She murmured, feeling a little choked on emotion but meaning it. She really did love the little girl who cuddled up on her lap so easily. It had always been hard not to, she was adorable, kind hearted and so much like her daddy that you'd have to be heartless not to fall for her and on hearing the sentiment coming from her so easily it was impossible not to return it.

She loved them both, totally and utterly and she'd do anything she could to keep the pair of them safe and happy. It felt good to be able to let Lucy know that, all she needed now was for Edward to heal and come out of his coma so she could tell him too. 

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><p><em>AN - Well I got it posted! I apologise for any mistakes, I just did the final edit whilst watching the Tim Minchin DVD I got for my birthday...probably wasn't the best of ideas but oh well...he's funny :D<em>

_For the first paragraph you have Miss Congeniality to thank (favourite film of all time) ...the rest of it took a slightly unexpected turn but I kinda liked it so stuck with it. _

_Thank you for reading and to all those who review :) Hopefully the next chapter will be up on Saturday but I discovered today I have to go back to my parents house for the dentist on Friday. I'll be there the whole weekend and my laptop is falling apart so I can't take it with me. Hopefully my mums one still works and I remember to take the files with me._


	40. Chapter 38 Head Above Water

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer and the chapter title belongs to a song by Theory Of A Deadman

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><p><strong>Chapter 38 – Head Above Water<strong>

Everything hurt.

That was the first thing Edward was aware of.

The second was that there was something in his throat that made him want to swallow yet felt like it was choking him when he did.

The third was that the bed he was laid in did not feel like his own. It was far too hard and wherever he was smelt far too clinical to be his room. His eyes were too heavy to pull open so all he had to try and work out where he was and what had brought him there was his memory but all that gave him was a big blank darkness.

His thoughts stayed slow and groggy no matter how much he tried to concentrate them and though a little light was filtering through his closed eyelids he could still see the darkness around the edges like if he just gave into it he could drift back to the nothingness where there was no pain. It was a tempting idea.

Something was holding him on the edge of awareness though and as he tried to concentrate his thoughts again to work out what it was he started to hear something beeping in a steady, annoying rhythm that the pain in his head pulsed in time with, dragging him further away from the welcoming darkness he wanted to fall back into.

He tried to focus on something other than the pain in his head which was quickly scattering his poor attempts at gathering his thoughts but only ended up alerted to just how bad the rest of him felt. His right leg felt strange, heavy and restricted so the only movement he could get out of it was to wiggle his toes and while his other leg felt more normal, it still ached enough that he didn't want to try moving it. There was a throbbing pain in his left shoulder and when he tried to move that arm he found it was bound exactly where it was and his other arm seemed to be attached to something as when he experimentally twitched his fingers he could feel something pulling with a sharp pain on the back of his hand.

"I think he's coming round!"

A voice he recognized interrupted his inventory and when he felt a warm hand very lightly enclose and squeeze the one he'd just tried to flex he was sure it was Bella. The tingling where their skin touched was far too familiar for it to be anyone else. Her words confused him briefly as he heard shuffling around him and he wondered again just where he was and what was going on.

"Edward? If you can hear me, try and open your eyes for us."

That voice was Carlisle and the odd question finally made everything click into place as he realised he had to be back in the hospital. It almost made him want to force his eyes open so he could see what was actually wrong with him but they were just too heavy. He did try but they felt almost like they were glued together and he just couldn't quite manage it.

"Come on Edward please, it's been far too long without seeing your eyes."

Bella's pleading voice hit something inside him, tugging at the part of him that knew it was time to wake up. He could still feel the tingling in his hand as she held onto it, softly stroking his skin with her thumb and he wanted to be able to see her too. If she wanted him to open his eyes he didn't want to disappoint her so he tried again, putting everything he had into getting them open but they were barely a slit apart before he had to shut them again as the bright light in the room burnt.

"That's it, that's good Edward."

Carlisle's voice was soothing and encouraging but instead of coaxing his eyes open again it lulled him back to the semi consciousness that promised to be pain and worry free. Waking up was so much harder and the only thing holding him there was Bella's grip on his hand and despite his desire to do what she wanted and see her it just wasn't enough. The pain was growing too much as the longer he floated on the edges of consciousness the more he was aware of and there was a deep ache developing in his chest and a sharper, stronger pain in his side that was beginning to overpower everything else. He didn't want to feel it.

"Stay with us Edward and we can get this ventilator removed before Lucy gets here. She's looking forward to getting her daddy back."

Carlisle's words were exactly what he needed to pull him back from edge as if he didn't want to disappoint Bella, he certainly couldn't disappoint Lucy no matter how much pain he had to push through. He started to panic and the annoying beeping got faster as he choked on whatever was in his throat and struggled to breathe past it. He had no idea where Lucy was. He hadn't heard her voice and he couldn't feel her presence. She wasn't there and she should have been with him.

"Edward we need you to stay calm. Lucy is ok and perfectly safe. Just concentrate on opening your eyes for us. I promise you she's ok."

Carlisle's attempt at comforting him worked a little to dispel some of his panic and the beeping started to slow again as Edward was relieved to know she was safe but he still didn't know how long he'd been in hospital or what had happened to put him there so it gave him no clues as to whether anything had happened to Lucy as well. He was certain that someone would have been taking good care of her for him as he doubted Carlisle would lie to him but for all he could remember she could have been hurt when he was and that possibility set off an urgent need to see her or at least find out exactly where and how she was so with a strengthened determination he managed to pry his eyes open again to be met with the sight of Carlisle leaning over him slightly and he tried not to let his eyes shut again as he looked for Bella. He felt her squeeze his hand again before she appeared beside Carlisle.

"Hey you." She said softly and her smile made the effort of keeping his eyes open worthwhile as she ran her free hand into his hair unknowingly soothing some of his pain and her calm, happy expression comforted him a little about Lucy. If anything was wrong he was sure he would have seen some sign of it in her expressive eyes but she just looked pleased to see him.

"Ok, let's get this tube out of the way. When I say so, I need you to cough for us Edward." Carlisle instructed, shattering their brief moment as he got straight down to business. He was there right then in the capacity of a doctor and he had a job to do before they got stuck in to the emotional reunions. "It's going to be uncomfortable and hurt a little but you'll feel a lot better once it's out."

With his full consciousness returned Edward didn't think he could hurt anymore than he already did so he had no qualms about following Carlisle's instructions but he still kept his gaze very firmly on Bella who had stepped to the side a little to be out of the way while still holding onto his hand.

When Carlisle said to, Edward coughed and the tube that allowed the ventilator to breathe for him was pulled out. It did hurt and removing it made his eyes water, then once it was finally out he became aware of how dry his mouth was and how rough his throat felt. Still, it was better than having the tube stuck there as he felt like he could finally breathe properly. Carlisle tried to get an oxygen mask onto him but he turned his head away and refused to let Carlisle get it into place. He had questions he needed answers to and once Carlisle had given up and allowed Bella to hold a glass of water with a straw to his mouth he felt ok enough to try and voice them.

"Wha' happen..?" He croaked finding getting words out to be more difficult than it should have been. He just couldn't get his tongue around them. "Lucy...ok?"

"Lucy's fine, she's in school. We thought it would be best to let you get your bearings a little before she visits. You were very badly beaten a week ago." Carlisle explained quickly as they needed him to stay calm, "You don't remember any of it?"

Edward tried to shake his head, ending up wincing as it made his headache worse but Bella stroked her fingers through his hair again and it soothed it a little.

"That's understandable; from the head injury and the extremely high levels of rohypnol in your blood when you came in we weren't really expecting you to remember much. It might come back to you at some point but we'll just have to wait and see." He commented and Edward felt frustrated at the big blank hole in his memory when he tried to think about it. There was just nothing there. The last thing he could remember was being excited to tell Bella about his promotion. He'd busied himself with the dishes and then... nothing.

"Don't stress over it, there's plenty of time to think about it later." Bella said seeing Edward's furrowed brow and correctly guessing where his thoughts had gone. Hearing her voice again he tried to pull himself back and concentrate on her, this time seeing just how tired she looked. He didn't like that and it effectively distracted him.

"She's right, don't try to force it. It'll come back in time and we need you to stay calm right now. How are you feeling? Any trouble breathing?" Carlisle jumped back in and Edward could tell just from his voice that he was talking as a doctor rather than his uncle.

"Hurts," He got out before coughing to try and clear his throat as it still felt clogged even though there was nothing there anymore. Coughing only made it hurt with a fresh burn though so he reached for the water that was still clutched in Bella's hand with the arm he could now see had various IVs attached to it. She was quick to see what he was after and brought the straw back up to his lips so he could take a few sips before trying to get his next question out. "Wha's...wrong... with me?"

"Pain is to be expected I'm afraid. Your injuries were serious and extensive. Your whole body was badly beaten; your right tibia and knee cap are both broken which is why your leg is in a cast, your left shoulder was dislocated again and it's going to have to stay in that sling for a while longer this time. Several of your ribs are broken and one of them punctured your right lung which we are going to have to monitor closely and you were stabbed with a broken chair leg in your abdomen. That caused some problems internally; you lost a lot of blood and we had to remove your spleen which will cause some complications with your immune system so you'll need some immunizations. We had to keep you in a medicated coma for a week as you had some swelling around your brain but it looks like that's not caused any lasting damage now it's gone down. Other than that, you'll have a sore throat for a while from the intubation and you're going to need oxygen to keep your levels up as your lungs are still weak." Carlisle rattled off and Edward felt his head swim a little. It was just far too much to take in and when he looked to Bella he could see she looked uncomfortable too although she smiled when she noticed him looking at her.

"I know it sounds like a lot and it is but so far you're doing well and we're going to take good care of you so you're going to be fine, it'll just take a little time. Now I'm actually on duty so I'm going to have to leave you with Bella but if you need anything she knows where the call button is and I'll ring Esme and let her know you're awake. Emmett's already planning to bring Lucy in as soon as she's out of school. I'll send a nurse in soon to get that oxygen mask on you." Carlisle continued seeing Edward was looking overwhelmed and knowing it was best to give him some space. Bella would be able to answer any questions he was likely to have anyway. She hadn't left the hospital for longer than to go home, shower and change her clothes in the last week and only then if both Emmett and Carlisle were in the hospital. She'd listened intently to all of the details on Edward's condition and he knew she'd memorized everything that had been said in regard to his recovery.

Carlisle was actually a little worried about her. He could understand why after what had happened and how involved she'd been that she'd feel uneasy leaving Edward but to him it seemed a little more than that. Everyone could see how exhausted she was looking and he didn't think she was managing to get very much sleep in the uncomfortable hospital chair she refused to leave. Even Lucy had tried to lure her away from the hospital one afternoon by offering to show Bella her new room but she had somehow managed to say no even when Lucy pouted. She was usually so strong but the cracks were definitely starting to appear and it didn't look good to Carlisle. He wasn't planning to say anything until after Edward had been awake for a while though in the hope that things would sort themselves out.

Bella and Edward both missed Carlisle's concerned gaze as he left, too caught up in staring at each other. Bella still couldn't get over the relief of seeing him awake. The last week had been a complete nightmare for her as she sat at his side and nothing had seemed to change. His condition had been stable and improving but that hadn't really meant a whole lot when he stayed unmoving with his eyes closed. Now she could see their wonderful green she couldn't pull her eyes away. Everything she'd been holding back just to keep some semblance of normality for Lucy was bubbling just under the surface as her relief cleared the way for it and she could feel her emotions beginning to get the better of her.

"You can't ever scare me like that again." She warned Edward the second they heard the door swing shut behind Carlisle but before Edward could think of trying to get a response out his face was cradled between her hands as she leant down and kissed him softly. When she pulled back he could see tears glistening in her eyes igniting the agonizing urge to hold her.

"Please don't cry." He pleaded hoarsely as he tried futilely to shuffle into a more upright position to be able to reach her. The most he could manage though was to lift his arm weakly to try and catch her hand and noticing his movement Bella automatically grabbed onto him, threading her fingers through his.

"I'm sorry. It's just such a relief to see you awake. I was so scared, this last week's been horrible." She mumbled, trying to stem her tears as she wiped at her eyes with her free hand.

Feeling totally helpless being unable to do anything but watch her, Edward studied her closely and for the first time he noticed the small gauze pad on her neck and the faded bruises next to it. Staring at them brought a sudden flash of watching James pin someone to a wall with his hands around their neck and his stomach dropped as he realised it wasn't Lucy he should have been worried about.

"You were there?" He asked with sudden clarity which jerked Bella's head up from where she'd been trying to hide her continued tears.

"No, Phil and I found you on your kitchen floor. You stopped breathing before the ambulance arrived. I thought we were going to lose you." She answered, finally getting a hold on her emotions enough that she could see Edward's confusion as he studied her.

"Then what...?" His voiced died out before he could get the full question out and he grimaced in annoyance hating the fact he couldn't do something as simple as talking before trying to lift their joined hands to point at her throat. He saw the sudden realisation come into her eyes as she figured out what he was asking about and let their hands fall back.

He was so tired already and he'd hardly been awake.

"It's nothing." Bella mumbled, unsure what to tell him and hoping he'd just let it go considering his eyes were dropping closed against his will anyway. She'd tell him eventually, once he was well enough to be out of the hospital bed. He didn't need to be worrying over her right then and she knew he would if she told him how she'd been hurt as he'd blame himself for it.

"Bella." He drew out her name in an agitated sigh and forced his eyes open to stare at her and make it clear he wanted to know what was going on. The fact she was trying to brush it off and not answer just panicked him, something she was made aware of when the beeps from his heart monitor started to speed up again with her continued silence.

"Really, it's nothing. Don't get worked up over it. I'm fine, you're fine and Lucy's good, that's all that matters. We can talk about this later, when you're better." Bella responded while trying to find a smile to assure him everything really was fine but Edward shook his head.

"Tell me." He demanded although it came out as more of a whisper. If she didn't answer him soon he'd have no voice left at all and there was no way he could relax like they wanted him too if he didn't know what had happened to her. She'd been hurt somehow and the fact she wouldn't tell him what had happened caused him to believe it had something to do with him and he couldn't stand that. If he'd gotten her hurt he'd never forgive himself. He'd also still got the image floating around his head of James pinning someone against the wall and there was something about it that made him think it was real, that he _had_ seen that. She had the corresponding marks so if that wasn't her he needed to know for sure. Either she was lying to him or someone else had been there when James had beaten him.

"It's really not important." She tried to deflect it again but he could see the cracks appearing in her forced smile. Something about what had caused those marks on her throat was really getting to her. There was more to her reluctance to tell him than just not wanting him to worry. He could see it quite clearly in her eyes and it made him even more determined to know what it was.

"It is."

His eyes were pleading with her to just tell him and she made the mistake of looking up and straight into them. He was still so weak and yet he was determinedly staying awake when she could see sleep pulling at him just to find out what had happened to her so she caved.

"Fine," She sighed, "If you're so determined to know, James came here looking to finish what he'd started only it ended up being me who finished it."

"Wha'...happen...?" He struggled to get the words out but knowing James had been the one to mark her eclipsed everything else he was feeling. He had to know exactly what had happened. He really never would forgive himself for getting her involved in his mess but he'd certainly do everything he could to make it up to her if she gave him the chance.

"The first night you were in here he turned up. Everyone else had gone home to get some sleep and the policeman who was meant to be guarding your door left. James came in, we fought and the police caught him. It's nothing to worry about, I'm fine and he's with the police now. He isn't coming back." She muttered awkwardly as she pulled her hand away from his and lifted her feet onto her chair so she could wrap her arms around her knees. Edward could see in her posture and the way she'd pulled away from him that there was more to it than what she was saying and as her words filtered through his sluggish thoughts he was alarmed to hear she'd fought with him.

"You...fought...? How?" The idea of it alone baffled him as he was well experienced in just how well planned James' attacks had been. There'd never been a chance for him to fight back.

"He wasn't expecting me to fight. I know self defence." Bella shrugged though she was still wrapped around herself and closed off from him and Edward didn't like it. It wasn't how she usually acted and though he'd obviously scared her and the last week hadn't been easy for her he was sure it wasn't right. There was something she still wasn't telling him.

"What's wrong?" He asked hoping that he was right and she hadn't just pulled away from him because she'd finally realised what a mistake she'd made in choosing him.

Bella shook her head before lifting it to meet his eyes making him curse the fact he couldn't move to make her go to him once again when he saw the turmoil in her expression.

"I stabbed him." She finally whispered and Edward gaped at her for a moment before his mouth twitched up into half a smile only for it to fall straight away as she started to cry again. "I didn't mean to. It was his knife, he dropped it when I kicked him to get out of his hold then when we both scrambled for it, I reached it first. He nearly choked me then Elizabeth came in and I managed to get out from underneath him and pin him down. I was just trying to keep him still until the police got there but he bucked underneath me and I tried to stop myself falling and the knife was still in my hand. I just wanted to get free and call for help; I didn't want to end up stabbing someone."

"Come here." Edward demanded, managing to make his voice strong despite the burn in his throat while lifting his hand up again and catching hold of her the instant she moved close enough. He then used every last bit of strength he had to tug her down to land beside him so he could wrap his arm around her. She just cried as he held her against his chest, missing the way he grimaced at the contact and his breathing hitched. He didn't let go of her though needing the contact just as much as she did as he couldn't stand to see her so upset especially as it was all his fault.

It was hard to make out all of what she'd said. She'd spoken so fast and it had been garbled through her tears so with that and his exhaustion tugging at him he'd missed a lot of it though he got the gist. She'd fought James to protect him and had ended up stabbing him with his own knife. Edward couldn't help but think it was strangely poetic that after everything he'd done, all his elaborate plans, Bella had been the one to take him down and with his own weapon. He was amazed by it just as much as he was horrified. He didn't want to think about her standing against James and was just glad she wasn't the one who'd come out on the wrong end of the knife but he was amazed at her strength.

As she continued to cry against him he just wished she hadn't had to do it.

"I'm sorry." He murmured into her hair and she jerked up, lifting herself away from him in response so she could see his face.

"No! It wasn't your fault. It was all James'. I don't regret what I did at all. He tried to kill you twice! I just, I don't know...it went too far and I guess it's freaked me out a little to discover what I'm capable of. I'm sorry for getting so upset. I'm so relieved you're awake and it all just got too much. I watched you almost die twice; I'd do anything to stop that from happening again. I love you and Luce so much."

Bella stopped speaking as Edward stared at her wide eyed and she realised what had just slipped out in her emotional ramble.

"That wasn't how I intended to say that for the first time." She mumbled as she blushed and looked down at Edward's blanket covered chest only to realise she probably shouldn't have been leaning against him. She scrambled back to ensure she couldn't hurt him any more than she probably already had with the intention of returning to her chair but Edward reclaimed her hand just before she could leave the bed so she paused to sit on the edge of it instead and looked back at him. He was still staring at her with wide disbelieving eyes and she hoped she hadn't ruined everything by coming across too strong and scaring him.

"I'm sorry, I know it's probably too soon and I'm not expecting you to say it back. Can we just forget I said anything?" She asked doubtfully but Edward shook his head before a smile crept across his face.

"Love you too." He murmured, his smile growing at Bella's stunned expression. He'd thought it before and though he'd wanted time to get his head around the idea, it felt good to admit it to her, especially after hearing her say it first. He may have been new to the whole idea of relationships and they probably were moving far too fast, not to mention he'd only just come out of a coma and his thoughts were all over the place but somehow he just knew it was right. He did love Bella and after everything she'd gone through for him it was only fair that he owned up to it. From what he'd managed to keep up with and piece together it seemed he'd very nearly died, more than once, so clearly the time for being cautious was long past. Even in his confused, exhausted and not quite with it state he knew he wanted a life with Bella and it suddenly seemed very important that she knew that.

"You do?" She asked hesitantly and when he nodded she smiled brilliantly for just a moment before she leant down and kissed him. His lips were dry and chapped but that didn't matter. He was alive, awake and loved her which was a lot more than she thought she'd ever have just the week before. She tried to hover over him so as not to hurt him but as soon as the kiss deepened Edward managed to get his arm around her waist and tugged her down. It made it easier for both of them and after a moment's hesitation Bella relaxed into it and let her hand wind into his hair. He made a contented sounding noise which only encouraged Bella further as she revelled in the feeling of having him so close. It had been a long week of one sided hand holding and feather light kisses so it was amazing to finally feel him responding to her again.

When they finally broke apart, much sooner than they both would have liked due to Edward's lack of breath, Bella buried her face in his neck and lightly kissed it. She'd thought before that all she'd needed was to see his eyes open and hear his voice but she'd been wrong. After just one kiss she felt so much lighter.

While seeing him awake had been enough to quell her worry for him, the closeness had done more than anything else could to put what had happened with James into perspective. If she had lost that fight, she wouldn't have been able to feel his lips against hers or the heat of his skin under her fingertips ever again. She'd been seconds away from exactly that. If it hadn't of been for her hand holding onto the knife she would never have gotten to hear him utter those two important words or have the chance to voice them herself. Nothing was worth losing that for and certainly not James. No, the guilt she felt for seriously harming another person was no match for the pure wonder of being in Edward's arms again and she could virtually feel all traces of it being washed away by his love.

"Love you." She murmured into his skin before forcing herself to pull back and slide away, back into her seat as Edward watched her with a slightly dazed and sleepy smile. She might not have wanted to ever leave his arms but he was still in a hospital bed and she could tell he needed to get back to sleep. Carlisle had warned them that he'd only be awake for brief stints in between sleeping for the next few days. He was out of the coma but his body was still working hard to heal itself leaving little energy for much else and the pain medication he was on would make him even drowsier.

"Love you too." He echoed as his eyes drifted closed before he snapped them open wanting to stay in the moment with her for just a little longer. Things didn't even hurt quite so much anymore and he wondered if he'd be able to convince Bella of the pain relieving ability of her kiss so she'd do it again although from the way she was watching him with a slightly amused smile he was pretty sure she was going to make him sleep instead.

"Don't fight it. I'll still be here when you wake up." She commented proving his thoughts right as she reached up to stroke a hand through his hair again. He knew it was pointless fighting the exhaustion then, he never could resist the relaxing sensation of someone playing with his hair and the fact it was Bella made it so much more potent.

He was fast asleep a minute later.

* * *

><p>"Shhh he's sleeping." Bella cautioned as Lucy ran into Edward's room, shortly followed by Emmett.<p>

"You said he'd be awake when we got here." Lucy huffed quietly as she turned to glare at Emmett before she continued towards Bella.

"He's just napping this time Luce. It's not a coma like before." Bella explained as she lifted Lucy onto her lap.

"So he'll wake up soon?" She asked hopefully as she peered over to Edward, encouraged by the fact she could see the ventilator had been removed and replaced with a much less scary looking oxygen mask. The bruises had faded a little over the week as well so he was finally starting to look a little more normal.

"I'm sure he will. He's looking forward to seeing you." Bella answered and as Lucy looked back to her she was a little startled by how happy Bella looked. She had gotten used to coming into the hospital and seeing Bella looking tired and worried.. The forced, fake smiles never had fooled her. She still looked tired but the smile really was an improvement.

"You look better." She commented out loud making Bella laugh a little as she messed up Lucy's hair which she noticed Emmett had left lose again.

"Yup, I'm glad to have your daddy back with us. I see we still need to teach Uncle Emmett how to do your hair." Bella answered and Lucy grinned.

"He's useless!" She announced, loving how Bella's smile grew into a grin. It felt like forever since she'd smiled properly at anything.

"Luce that's not very nice." Edward croaked, his voice muffled behind the mask but it was still clear enough to alert them all to the fact he'd woken up and Lucy turned to look at him with a large, bashful grin.

"But it's true!" She complained making everyone laugh as she scrambled onto the edge of his bed to get closer to him.

"Love you daddy." She added sweetly, earning a sleepy smile from Edward as he mumbled it back and a sigh from Emmett.

"She always manages to sweet talk her way out of it." He grumbled good naturedly, "It's not my fault I can't do hair...I'm a boy, I'm not meant to be able to do that kind of thing."

"Daddy's a boy and he can do it." Lucy helpfully pointed out while very carefully cuddling into Edward's side since he'd lifted his arm to let her wriggle underneath it.

"Yes, but he is a daddy...that gives him special powers." Emmett argued before flopping down into the second chair. It was good to hear the light hearted banter for a change even if it was aimed at making fun of him. Edward wasn't the only one looking considerably better and it was a relief to see both Bella and Lucy happy. They'd all been trying their best to continue on as normal without Edward but the difference now he was awake was astounding. It felt like a huge weight had been lifted off them all.

"I guess he has a point there Luce, your dad is pretty special." Bella commented, the smile on her face turning a little softer as she watched them get reacquainted. She knew Edward had to be uncomfortable but just looking at him you couldn't tell as he was so concentrated on Lucy and she was absolutely beaming. It was unbelievably good to see them back together like that.

"He's the best daddy." Lucy mumbled before kissing his chest since it was the closest part of him to her and she didn't want to move. It had been far too long since she'd last been able to snuggle up with him. "Are you feeling better now?"

"Much better now you're here." Edward answered after Bella helped him get the oxygen mask off and as he let his fingers run through Lucy's curls he really meant it. It was a big relief to see her looking healthy and happy and if she was able to tease Emmett it showed they had to have been taking good care of her and keeping her spirits up. It hurt where she pressed against his side but he'd ignore it so she could stay right where she was for a while. It felt good to have her back in his arms.

"What have I missed Luce?" He asked, his voice coming out a lot clearer and without causing his throat to hurt as much as the first time he'd woken up. He'd wanted to ask Bella the same thing earlier but he'd been so tired and she'd seemed so reluctant to talk and then they'd gotten distracted and he'd fallen asleep too soon. While he hoped Lucy knew very little of what had actually happened he also knew how observant she was and she'd tell him everything she did know without trying to hide anything. With how excited she seemed she'd probably just blurt everything out whether she'd been asked to keep things quiet or not.

He turned out to be right when Lucy ploughed straight into a detailed description of staying at Esme and Carlisle's house, explaining exactly what both of their rooms were like, how Emmett, Jasper and Carlisle had moved most of their personal things there, and that Alice and Emmett were both staying there too.

As she talked, he glanced to both Emmett and Bella and saw they were watching him apprehensively and he could tell they were expecting questions and probably a fight considering Lucy had made it pretty clear they weren't just staying with Esme and Carlisle but had in fact moved in with them but he just let Lucy talk deciding he could think about that more later. It was hard enough just trying to follow Lucy's chatter without adding extra questions into it.

It seemed he'd missed a lot as Lucy went on to tell him Emmett had quit his job and Bella hadn't left the hospital despite everyone's best efforts, something Lucy seemed to think was very important to stress as she told him she'd even refused to go and visit her new room. He knew they'd be talking about that later once Lucy had gone home as it certainly made Bella's worn out appearance that morning make sense but Lucy still wasn't finished talking.

She moved on to more mundane topics, explaining what she'd been doing at school and complaining about the new reading book she'd been given before her stomach started grumbling and she reluctantly moved out from under Edward's arm.

"Bella, can we go to the canteen? I'm hungry." She asked while Edward watched her curiously, spotting that look in her eye that meant she was up to something. The way Bella was eying her warily suggested she'd seen it too.

"You could probably do with eating something as well." Emmett chipped in knowing that it was unlikely she'd left Edward's room all day.

"I guess. You'll be staying here?" She asked and they all saw the brief flash of panic in her eyes as she stood from her chair. Emmett and Lucy had been expecting it but Edward looked on with concern as her smile fell away and she started to look anxious.

"Of course." Emmett answered before he stood and dug his wallet out of his pocket. "Here... take your time and get something decent to eat for both of you. We'll be just fine up here and you know Carlisle is close by."

Bella accepted the ten pound note Emmett was offering but still looked a little uneasy as she helped Lucy down from Edward's bed. With spending so much time in the hospital she was down to just a pocketful of change as in her rush to get back to the hospital the few times she had left she kept forgetting to pick up her purse. Most of the time she hadn't really needed the money as Esme kept bringing things in for her anyway.

"We'll be back soon." She mumbled, leaning down to place a chaste kiss against Edward's cheek before she let Lucy drag her from the room leaving Edward wondering what was going on with her. He'd thought earlier she'd been off but he'd assumed it would be better after their talk and she had seemed much happier. He definitely hadn't expected her to react like that just being asked to go to the canteen.

"What's going on with Bella?" He asked Emmett once the door to his room had shut and Emmett sighed as he moved into Bella's chair so it was easier for Edward to see him.

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about but we'll get to that in a minute. Lucy will keep her down in the canteen for a while. How are _you_ feeling?" He asked instead making Edward glare at him a little as he was more interested in Bella.

"Sore." He answered shortly.

"Carlisle said you would be. Do you remember what happened?" Emmett asked, unfazed by Edward's bluntness.

"Not yet and no one's really told me anything about it." He answered, his curiosity being caught a little as he wondered if he could get Emmett to tell him more. He hated not knowing even though he was pretty sure he probably wouldn't want to know once he did.

"I think the police want to talk to you before we tell you too much." Emmett responded, "But you know it was James right?"

"Yeah, Bella said he came here to finish it too." He answered making Emmett sigh again as he leant forward, resting his elbows against his knees as he stared at the floor for a moment.

"He did and I'm sorry I wasn't here, or at the flat the first time." He finally responded, glancing up briefly before looking back down. They were all struggling with the fall out of what had happened one way or another and his was the guilt of not having been there yet again.

"You couldn't have known." Edward replied quietly, seeing the guilt and not understanding it. He'd always known James would find a way to get what he wanted; there was nothing any of them could have done to have prevented it, except apparently Bella.

"What happened here with Bella? She told me something about stabbing him but she was crying and I was tired, I think I missed half of it."

"She didn't stab him, not really. It was an accident. He came here with the intention of killing you and when he found Bella sitting here with you he told her to leave apparently not expecting her to fight. Somehow she managed to get him pinned to the floor but he bucked underneath her and when she put her arms out to stop her fall she was still holding the knife. It's kind of awesome actually; she got him in the groin." Emmett explained only confusing Edward further.

"Why's she so upset about it? She's not in trouble over it or something is she?"

"No, police ruled it as self defence, which it was. I'm not really sure why it's upset her so much, she won't talk to any of us about it. If I'd been here I would have done a lot worse and it wouldn't have been self defence. He certainly deserved it but for whatever reason it's totally thrown her. I guess it's not that surprising considering it happened so soon after she found you in such a state. Did she tell you she was with you when you stopped breathing and again in the ambulance when your heart stopped? Carlisle said she was pretty out of it then until Lucy got here."

"I can't believe what I've put her through. I wish she wasn't there yet I'm selfishly glad she was." Edward responded truthfully. She should have run away from him a long time ago, it wasn't fair that she'd had to go through something so horrendous for him. He wasn't worth it.

"We're all glad she was there. Without her you wouldn't be here, we owe her everything. I'm not telling you all of this to make you feel bad, that's the last thing any of us want, including Bella, but she won't listen to any of us so you need to talk to her. She hasn't left the hospital for longer than to go home, shower and change. She's not eating properly and she certainly hasn't slept properly since you got here and you heard what Lucy said. She really did turn her down and that was even with Lucy doing that sad, wide eyed pouty look none of us can refuse. You've got to talk to her and persuade her to go home and get some rest or she's going to crack. I know Carlisle's worried about her but he's been waiting until you came round to see if she'd get better on her own. Considering how reluctant she was to leave here just now I'd say it's going to take a little more than just you coming round."

"I'll try." He agreed. Part of him wanted her to stay as he'd always found her presence comforting but he wouldn't allow his own selfishness put her health at risk.

"Good, if that fails I'll carry her out of here although given how well she's proved she can fight I'd rather not risk it." Emmett commented with a grin in an attempt to lighten the mood a little, "Now is there anything else you want to talk about before they get back, I doubt Lucy will be able to keep Bella distracted for too much longer."

"We're living with Esme and Carlisle?"

"Err yeah, we figured it would be best. They already had a room all set up for Lucy in the hope she'd be able to stay over occasionally and you're not going to be able to use crutches with your shoulder and ribs so there's no way you could have coped with all those stairs in the flat block. Plus it's kind of a mess and considering the way you were found we didn't think you or Lucy would be comfortable being there anymore. Their house is huge so there's plenty of room and Esme seems to love having us all there." Emmett explained, hopeful Edward wouldn't fight it. They all knew how independent he liked to be but it just wasn't possible for him, not for a while.

"Lucy certainly seems to like it." Edward commented and Emmett nodded.

"Esme's spoiling her with all the new clothes and toys. They had the whole thing totally kitted out for her." He responded and watched as Edward frowned a little although he didn't say anything about it leaving Emmett to wonder when the fight was going to come.

"Lucy's been ok?" Edward asked instead.

"She really has, to be honest she's been better than the rest of us. I don't know how she does it." Emmett answered only for Edward's frown to intensify, "What's wrong?"

"You're sure she's really ok? She picks up on things you don't even realise and reacts to it. When I've been upset over something and tried to pretend everything's ok she gets this look sometimes like she knows what I'm doing and she acts happier to try make things easier when really she's just as upset or more so than I am. If you've all been trying to pretend everything's fine just for her, especially Bella, then she might be trying to make things easier." He explained, having to reach for his oxygen as he got out of breath by the end of it. It was just how they both worked. Usually they'd have their cuddle after dinner or he'd take her to the park to see the ducks and everything would be fine but if she'd been pretending for everyone else and they'd missed it she wouldn't have been getting the reassurance she'd ultimately need. A lot had happened and changed by the sounds of it and he just couldn't see how she'd be handling that all so well. She was an amazing kid but it was just too much.

"There's been a bit of that around Bella I guess but as I said, Esme's been spoiling her and keeping her entertained in the evenings and the school hasn't mentioned anything being wrong there. You don't need to worry, she's a very strong, resilient little girl and now you're awake again she's got everything she needs. I promise we're all taking real good care of her."

Edward just nodded a little and let his eyes fall shut as the tiredness started to creep up on him again. He wasn't totally convinced by Emmett's assurances but the newness of the Cullen household would have been exciting for her and he believed they'd all be doing their best for her. If there was anything wrong he was sure she'd tell him eventually, he just had to work at getting better so she wouldn't feel like she had to be happy for him. He'd already caused Bella to be on the verge of a breakdown by the sounds of things, he really didn't want to do the same to Lucy.

"You ok?" Emmett asked after a couple of minutes of silence so Edward dragged his eyes open again.

"Just tired." He answered. He hoped Lucy and Bella would get back soon as he wanted to be able to chat to them for a little longer before he fell asleep.

"Pains not getting too much is it?" Emmett worried already half out of his seat as he looked at Edward with concern.

"Not if you don't remind me about it." Edward grumbled just as the door to his room flew open and Lucy ran in, Bella just behind her and looking a little sheepish.

"She might have talked me into letting her have ice cream." Bella apologised as the noticeably hyper Lucy tried to climb onto Edward's bed only for Emmett to catch her and sweep her up into his arms.

"Remember that conversation we had about how you have to be careful with your daddy for a while?" He asked her.

"She's ok, I could do with a hug." Edward argued but Emmett looked at him with a raised eyebrow making it clear hugs were meant to be off limits.

"Are you sure your ribs would agree with that?" He asked making Edward scowl but he did set Lucy down on the edge of the bed before standing and letting Bella have her seat back. "I'm going to leave you three in piece for a while...no squishing him while I'm gone...Carlisle will know and you will be in trouble!"

Lucy giggled and Bella promised to make sure Edward remained 'unsquished' which just made them both laugh again. After ruffling Lucy's hair up on his way out Emmett paused in the doorway to glance back, seeing Bella sitting in her usual spot with Lucy holding one of her hands and Edward's hand while Bella's free hand was brushing Edward's hair out of his eyes. They looked like a proper, happy little family and he hoped that one day soon they'd get the chance to be just that.

* * *

><p>Edward only managed to stay awake for a further half hour once Emmett left them but Lucy was content to sit and talk to Bella. They'd gotten very close during the last week as in many ways Lucy considered Bella to be the only person who really understood her daddy other than herself. She'd proven to have the same protective nature towards him and Lucy liked the fact she'd refused to leave his side. If she'd been older and didn't have to listen to all the adults she'd have demanded to do exactly the same thing but as it was she knew when there was no point in arguing and had learnt quickly during Edward's first hospital visit how things worked. It was easier to leave him though when she knew Bella would be there.<p>

Of course their new closeness also meant Lucy worried about Bella too. She'd been very aware that her attempts at smiles and light hearted conversations were all very fake. She'd accepted them for what they were and helped carry on the illusion for Bella's sake but she'd watched her get progressively darker circles under her tired eyes everyday and noted the haunted look to her eyes whenever she startled awake as they entered the room to visit and she knew what they meant. She'd seen the same look on Edward far too many times to miss it.

Having listened to all the adults trying to persuade Bella to go home and sleep she'd been torn between wanting Bella to demand to stay for her daddy's sake and wanting her to give in and go home for her own sake. She loved them both and while her dad would always come first she'd started to trust the rest of them when they promised he'd be ok and with Emmett and Carlisle's assurances that they'd stay so he wasn't left on his own she'd joined in the effort to get Bella to go home and rest.

Sitting there, with her daddy showing visible signs of getting better, Lucy was glad to see Bella also looking better. She knew Emmett would have talked to her daddy while they'd been in the canteen as that had been the plan all along but he hadn't said anything to Bella about going home while she'd been there and she figured he'd be waiting till she was home and they were alone. She was ok with that. As it was, right then, she was just pleased to see a real smile on Bella's face and a light in her eyes that had been missing the last week. She still looked tired but there was improvement and the more they'd talked to Edward the better she seemed to get making Lucy wonder if it was same as how his mood always affected hers. They certainly seemed to be well connected and she hadn't missed the way Bella always seemed to be watching Edward or touching him somehow and that they both seemed to find comfort in it. It was a slightly odd concept for her to think of him having that kind of connection to anyone other than her as it had always just been the two of them and she liked it that way but loving Bella the way she did she came to the decision that it was a good thing. She'd thought for a long time that Bella would be good for him, that he needed her in his life and it was good to know Bella needed him just as much.

"You should sleep over at Esme's house with me. We could watch a DVD." She suggested after Edward had been asleep for a little while and she was sure they wouldn't disturb him. She had asked Bella to go see her new room before but if Edward was going to try and talk her into leaving the hospital she figured she'd offer again. If Bella was being plagued by nightmares like she suspected she guessed company might help. She certainly preferred climbing into her daddy's bed when she couldn't sleep and she knew he slept better with her there too. She was fairly certain he'd slept a lot better the night Bella had stayed over at their flat as well and considering he couldn't offer to do that for Bella right then, Lucy was happy to. They'd had fun the times she'd stayed over at Bella's house after all and Bella had been there for her the first night she'd been there when Edward was in hospital before.

"Maybe another time." Bella answered, instantly brushing the suggestion off whilst looking at Edward in an attempt to avoid Lucy's stare. She could feel the way she was scrutinizing her and it made her worry about just what Lucy was seeing.

"Daddy's getting better now. Uncle Emmett would stay with him and Carlisle too...we could have a girls night with Esme and Auntie Alice!" Lucy tried again, elaborating on her original plan as she thought it through a little more. "You could even invite Anna, your mommy and Rosalie...I liked her and Uncle Emmett talks about her a lot...I think he_ really_ likes her."

"Luce I'm not sure you should be inviting all these people round to Esme's house without asking her first." Bella cautioned, still feeling uncomfortable under Lucy's gaze and trying to deter her but Lucy had been expecting her to say no so she wasn't put off.

."She won't mind. She likes you and she says it's good having a full house. It is an awfully big house." She answered with a shrug, "You don't have to invite them, so long as you come I don't mind."

"I'll think about it ok?" Bella gave in a little and wasn't surprised when Lucy grinned widely but it did almost make her want to give in completely. It was Edward's smile and it reminded her of how happy he'd looked after she'd unexpectedly blurted that she loved him.

"Thank you!" Lucy said happily as that had been all she'd been aiming for at that point. The suggestion was there for when Edward talked to her and she hoped it would help.

"That's not a yes Luce." Bella warned even though she was finding her resolve weakening a little the longer Lucy kept looking at her like that. She was so hard to say no to.

"I know." She chirped before she climbed down from Edward's bed to join her on her chair again. "Love you." She added making Bella narrow her eyes at her even though she couldn't hide her smile.

"Love you too but it's still not a yes." She responded which coaxed Lucy's grin back out as she cuddled into her more.

"Yet." She mumbled and Bella couldn't help but laugh at little at that. Lucy was probably right, but she wasn't going to let her know that quite yet. She still had a little will power left.

* * *

><p>Edward woke up again a little later on just in time to be introduced to Detective Jenks. Esme had arrived as well along with Alice but she'd herded everyone out of his room to leave him and the Detective alone not that it really got them anywhere. Edward couldn't remember any of the answers to the questions he asked and as for giving a full statement all Edward could tell him was he'd been doing the dishes after Garrett left and then it all went blank.<p>

Detective Jenks had then given him a brief idea of what was going on, assuring him they'd caught everyone involved before he'd left. Everyone else had then poured back into the room and Edward had found his headache reappearing with a vengeance as they all started talking. Eventually Carlisle entered, having finished his shift and saw immediately that Edward was struggling.

"I think it's time we all went home and let Edward get some more sleep." He announced as he moved through the group to get to Edward's chart. He was doing very well and Carlisle was pleased to see he hadn't had any issues with his breathing and oxygen levels even though he kept insisting on taking the oxygen off.

There was some grumbling while Carlisle finished looking over Edward's chart as no one really wanted to leave but eventually everyone said goodbye and they were ready to leave except for Bella.

"Are you sure we can't tempt you to come with us?" Carlisle asked looking at her with concern as she stubbornly stayed where she was.

"I can stay here." Emmett added. Since he'd quit his job it really didn't matter if he got any sleep or not and there were plenty of people at the house to take care of Lucy and get her to school in the morning.

"No, I'm staying here." She replied while curling her legs up onto the chair again as she closed herself off from them all. Seeing what she was doing Edward squeezed her hand gently as it still held his to get her attention.

"You should go, you look exhausted and I'm fine." He said and though she hated being the cause for the concern in his eyes she couldn't make herself leave. They didn't seem to understand that it wasn't just for Edward that she insisted on staying. She _needed_ to be there.

"I'm ok." She mumbled and she could feel Lucy watching her again so she looked up just in time to see her tug on Carlisle's arm to get his attention. He bent down to her level and she whispered something to him that made him frown before he nodded and looked back up to Bella, clearly concerned about what Lucy had just said.

"One more night, then I really must insist you go home." He said sternly while Lucy smiled from his side.

"Thank you." Bella murmured relieved that they weren't going to fight her as much as they had been doing and she happily accepted Lucy's hug and kiss on the cheek as she said another round of goodbyes wondering once again what she'd said to Carlisle and if she ought to be worried about it.

"Any idea what that was about?" Edward asked once everyone had left and Bella just shrugged as she truly didn't know. "You really should get some rest you know."

"I'm fine where I am." She responded making Edward sigh.

"I want to argue but I'm too tired."

"Then sleep. You don't need to worry about me." She replied, "You should put your oxygen back on, you're really not meant to keep taking it off."

"Not yet, it's kind of hard not to worry when everyone's telling me how much you need to sleep." He responding, toying with her fingers as they were the only part of her he could reach and he didn't like the reserved look on her face. She was still eying the oxygen mask as well making it obvious she really didn't want to talk.

"I can sleep here." She muttered.

"Sure you can, that's why you look so tired." He argued before wincing as his head throbbed particularly painfully. His time left awake was definitely limited.

"What's wrong?" Bella was out of her seat instantly and cupping one side of his face with her palm to keep him looking at her as she absentmindedly stroked his cheek with her thumb.

"Headache." He muttered so she slid her hand up into his hair and leaned down to kiss his forehead.

"Sleep, we can talk about this later. I'll be fine for one more night." She said softly, already reaching for the oxygen mask to help him put it back on.

"One more night, then Emmett's carrying you out of here if he has to." He mumbled, letting his eyes drift shut before he opened them once more to look into her eyes so she could see how serious he was, "I've already proved where not looking after yourself properly gets you. I can't watch you make yourself ill, I love you."

"I love you too. Just one more night I promise. Lucy invited me to have a sleep over with her, I'll tell her yes tomorrow." She gave in, unable to say no to him when he was saying something like that and staring at her so intently. He and his daughter really were a lethal pair when it came to her resolve. She didn't stand a chance.

"Good, she always tends to know best." He mumbled, already half asleep although he was just awake enough to kiss Bella back when she lightly kissed him goodnight before she lowered the oxygen mask into place and retreated to her seat to curl up again.

Watching Edward sleep she could feel her own exhaustion pulling at her but she fought it, finally understanding how Edward must have felt when he'd been fighting to stay awake and avoid his nightmares. She didn't know how she was going to get out of leaving the hospital the following day or what would happen if she did agree to Lucy's sleepover. All she was sure of was she didn't want to be away from Edward, she had to be able to see him.

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><p>Edward woke in the middle of the night to find out exactly why Bella was so adamant to stay in the hospital.<p>

She was asleep, but it was her sleep talking that had woken him as she was calling out his name. It was obviously a nightmare from the fear in her voice and he wanted to wake her but she'd dropped his hand in the night and she was too far away from him to reach. Pulling the oxygen mask back off he tried calling her name but that just got him another frightened plea from her.

Frustrated he tried to push himself up a little to get to her and was rewarded with a sharp stabbing pain in his abdomen. Cursing the continual failure of his body to do what he wanted he persevered through it and tried to use the edge of the bed to pull himself closer. He got an inch or so closer before his breathing became laboured and the pain became unbearable.

"Bella! Bella wake up! I'm right here." He called desperately and was grateful when she jerked awake until he saw the tears streaming down her face.

"You were gone." She accused, still stuck in the dream until she blinked and took in the way he was laying, his laboured breathing and the pained grimace. "What happened?"

"You were shouting for me, you sounded scared but you wouldn't wake up." He answered as she tried to help him get back into a more comfortable position and picked the oxygen mask back up from where it was dangling off the bed. He shook his head vehemently when she tried to pull it over his head and instead took it from her, just holding it in place so he could easily move it out of the way. He knew he needed the oxygen right then but he wasn't letting Bella use it to avoid talking.

"It was just a dream. You shouldn't have tried to move. Where does it hurt?" She asked, wiping the tears away from her skin as she looked him over.

"Abdomen." He muttered distractedly, "What was your dream about?"

"That's not important, let me see, you might have pulled out your stitches." She replied, already pulling his sheet down and looking for any sign of blood.

"I'm fine, tell me what happened in your dream. The nightmares are why you're refusing to leave aren't they?" He questioned realising that the very first thing she'd said before she'd woken up properly was that he was gone.

"You're lucky, it looks ok." She murmured, peering at his abdomen where the large white gauze pad was taped. There weren't any dark stains on it so she was pretty sure his stitches were still intact.

"I told you. Now sit down and tell me what you were dreaming about." He demanded impatiently.

"You're not breathing right. Maybe I should go get a nurse." Bella commented instead making Edward growl a little as she fluttered around him, pulling his sheet back up and tucking him in.

"It'll be fine in a minute, obviously moving around isn't the best of ideas for me right now. Sit down and talk to me before I pull you over here and make everything worse."

"It was just a nightmare." She sighed, collapsing back into her chair and running a hand through her hair. She really didn't want to talk about it.

"You were calling for me, you said I was gone." Edward prompted, watching her closely but she kept her eyes lowered.

"You were." She whispered.

"Where did I go?" He questioned. He really hated being the source of her distress and wanted to find some way to make it better but he couldn't comfort her if he didn't know what was wrong.

"They couldn't bring you back and James was just standing their gloating." She answered which was enough for him to understand. He could easily remember the dream he'd had where he'd died and it had shaken him badly enough. She'd already had to watch him practically die for real so it wasn't surprising the nightmares were bothering her so much and he knew well how draining they could be.

"I'm so sorry. Are they all the same?" He asked and she nodded again. "And they're why you don't want to leave?"

"I need to be able to see you." She cried and he saw quite clearly what she wasn't saying. She needed to be able to see him to make sure he was still alive.

"Come here." He said, lifting his arm up to signal he wanted her next to him and she obediently followed his request, apparently too upset to be worried about his breathing or injuries anymore.

"I'm ok, because of _you_. You found me, you saved me, _you_ stopped James. He isn't going to get to me again." He tried to comfort her as he nuzzled into her hair and wrapped his arm around her, holding her to his chest. "I'm here because of you and I'm not going anywhere."

He let her cry it out, murmuring words of comfort and love occasionally as she gradually calmed down. Eventually she was quiet and still and he figured they could try talking again.

"Maybe you should talk to Carlisle about those sleeping pills you all tried to convince me to take. The only reason I didn't want to take them was because I couldn't stand the idea of being drugged again but they might help." He suggested, finally admitting the reason they'd all suspected he'd been hiding behind caring for Lucy.

"I guess you're probably right. I'll talk to him tomorrow." She mumbled into his chest. It was so good to feel him warm and breathing underneath her and it did more to calm her than any of his words had. She wanted to stay right where she was forever.

"Lucy knows. I bet you that's what she told Carlisle." Edward mused as bringing up Carlisle had reminded him of Lucy whispering something to him before he'd given in and let Bella stay where she was. That, along with how she'd made sure to tell him all about Bella refusing to leave and the way she'd been watching Bella earlier all slotted into place in his mind. He knew she'd been planning something and he was sure the sleepover Bella had mentioned before he'd gone to sleep was it. "She has an uncanny knack for knowing when I've had nightmares and the way she's been with you today, the way she watches you. She's got you figured out as well. It'll be why she wants you to sleep over with her. She's trying to help."

"Nothing gets by her does it?" Bella sighed. She'd thought she'd been doing a decent job of acting normal for her but at least that suggestion made sense of why Lucy had been watching her so closely.

"Nope, not when she cares about something anyway. When she has nightmares she sleeps in my bed and she started doing the same when my nightmares started up."

"And now she wants to do the same for me?" Bella asked thinking it was incredibly sweet and there was no way she'd be able to turn her down the next time she asked if that was what she was doing.

"I think so."

"You guys really know how to make it impossible not to love you." She commented, a soft smile appearing as she really was touched that Lucy cared for her enough to want to do that for her. It made her wish Lucy was there with them so she could hug her and tell her she loved her again. It was such an overwhelming feeling.

"Good, that was the plan." Edward joked, trying to keep the smile that had appeared on Bella's face in place and get them back to a happier place before they tried to sleep again.

"Really?" Bella questioned, looking up from his chest with a playful glint to her eyes that made Edward smile in return.

"Well...honestly...the first one was to run and hide and pretend I didn't like you more than I should in an attempt to not get hurt or screw up your life but it turns out your just as impossible not to love and Lucy didn't even want to try so I never stood a chance."

"Well that's only fair, with your beautiful green eyes, kind hearts and adorable grins, I never stood a chance either." She countered successfully making him blush.

"So it all worked out perfectly." Edward concluded trying to ignore the fact Bella was obviously amused by his red face. At least it was keeping her happy.

"Apart from the hospital visits and near death experiences?" She teased and he rolled his eyes causing her to laugh a little.

"Yeah apart from those."

"Then yeah, it worked out perfectly." Bella agreed, smiling back as she saw his crooked grin only for it to be broken by a yawn. "I should let you get back to sleep."

"Stay right where you are." Edward countered as he felt her try to move away and tightened his arm around her as much as he could.

"I promised Emmett I wouldn't let you be squished." She reminded him still attempting to get out of his grip. She didn't want to end up hurting him.

"I don't care. You really think I'd be able to sleep if you're over in that damn chair having nightmares? You're staying right where you are and we're both sleeping." Edward stated leaving no room for arguments and Bella sighed as she settled back down, trying not to lean against him too heavily, something which was practically impossible considering how small the bed was.

"Carlisle is so going to kill me." She muttered quietly.

"No he won't, you saved my life. Stop worrying and go to sleep." He ordered so she gave in and reached up a little to kiss him briefly before she took the oxygen mask out of his hands and hooked the strap over his head to hold it in place as they slept. She heard him grumble a little about it so she kissed his forehead then settled back down, closing her eyes and smiling as she felt him tighten his arm around her again.

She slept peacefully for the rest of the night.

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><p><em>AN - Sorry I missed last weekend...turns out my mum's laptop only has a really old version of office on it and it couldn't open the files. Not sure what will happen next week..I've been called up for jury duty so no idea how much time that will take up and I'll finally be able to get hold of breaking dawn part 1 on monday :D.<em>

_Again...thank you to everyone who's reading this and especially those who take the time to leave a review!_

_P.S. Sorry for the multiple chapter upload alerts...it decided it wanted to display everything in bold when I tried to upload the chapter...hate it when it does that!  
><em>


	41. Chapter 39 Alliances

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 39 – Alliances<strong>

Edward was exhausted.

He had been woken up early by his inability to breathe properly and an excruciating stabbing pain emanating from his ribs. That had been all he'd needed to realise that no matter how much they'd wanted it, or needed it, he shouldn't have convinced Bella to sleep beside him for the night. Her head resting against his chest while comforting for them both had just been too much for him to physically take. Carlisle hadn't even bothered to chastise them for it when he'd been the one to find them first thing in the morning well aware from the guilty, almost tearful expression on Bella's face as she fluttered around Edward asking him what she could do to help and the pain written all over his that it wasn't something they'd be trying again anytime soon.

Once they'd gotten Edward settled by upping his pain medication and increasing his oxygen he'd finally been able to focus on something other than pain and had been pleased to see the dark circles beneath Bella's eyes had lightened considerably. That had allowed him to ignore the lingering dregs of pain the medication wasn't quite managing to eliminate as it had been worth it to see her looking more like her usual self. He'd felt even better when Bella had quietly asked Carlisle if she could speak to him later about her problems sleeping and he'd temporarily removed his oxygen mask again to tug her down for a quick kiss to show his approval before he'd succumbed to the effects of the increased medication and had fallen back to sleep.

From that point on he'd been inundated by visitors which was somewhat overwhelming. He'd spent so long on his own with just Lucy that though he'd gotten used to having Emmett around and Esme and Bella dropping into the flat it took the never ending stream of visitors that day for him to really realise just how many people he'd actually let into his life recently. It was both astounding to know so many people cared about him and exhausting.

Thankfully they'd had the sense to trickle in, in ones and twos so they didn't invoke his headache as badly as they had the evening before. Instead, every time he'd woken up someone different had been sitting in the chair opposite Bella. First it was Esme who had come in on her way to work and only stayed briefly, then it was Alice followed a little later by Jasper and Peter who all wanted to talk a little and assure themselves that Edward was indeed alive and well.

Phil, Renee and Anna brought Lucy in after school as they'd needed to bring a bag in for Bella with everything she'd need for Lucy's sleepover anyway. While Anna had proudly handed Edward a homemade get well soon card both Phil and Renee had commented on how pleased they were to see him awake before Renee had turned her attention to quizzing Bella on her health. Edward had already been struggling to keep his eyes open at that point but had managing to stay awake just long enough to get his good arm around Lucy as she climbed onto his bed and thank Phil for the role he'd played in keeping him alive and looking after Lucy on the trip to the hospital.

It had felt like he'd only blinked and Phil, Renee and Anna had been replaced by Garrett. Lucy had been out of his one armed hold and in Garrett's arms instead, babbling something that Edward was unable to make out as he dragged himself back to consciousness and tried to focus on them. Garrett didn't stay long but he did assure Edward that the assistant manager job would still be waiting for him when he was better and promised he'd drop in on him again once he was out of hospital.

After Garrett's visit Edward had been surprised to see Rosalie wander in. While she commented it was good to see him looking so well she seemed to be more interested in Bella which had suited Edward fine as Lucy had been sitting carefully on the edge of his bed, playing with his fingers while he tried his best to stay awake for her.

When she'd glanced up at Rosalie and started grinning her reaction had intrigued Edward enough that he'd lightly tugged on the fingers she had wrapped around his and had raised an eyebrow when she'd looked at him. She'd known exactly what he'd been asking and had scrambled up his bed a little, allowing them to carry out a whispered conversation without the rest of the room being able to hear.

She had quietly filled him in on all the gossip surrounding Emmett and Rosalie who seemed to be growing closer even though Rosalie was still making him work for it. Lucy was sure Emmett wanted to ask her out on a date but was too scared of being turned down. They hadn't been whispering for long when Emmett had appeared and his eyes had automatically glued to Rosalie who'd stared back at him with a flirtatious smile before going back to talking to Bella. Lucy had looked at Edward and they'd both ended up giggling drawing everyone's attention to them.

That lead to Emmett announcing it was time to split the pair of them up as he was sure they were up to something and even though Edward tried to protest that he couldn't possibly be up to anything being stuck in a hospital bed, Lucy's continued giggling gave them away. Using the excuse that they needed to get Bella back to Esme's and Carlisle's in time for dinner Emmett had managed to get Edward to reluctantly convince Bella to leave him and once Lucy invited Rosalie to dinner it hadn't taken much for him to convince Emmett to go with them.

Neither Bella nor Lucy had been too happy with that as Emmett had been intending to stay at the hospital for the night but in the end Edward had managed to persuade them that the nurses and doctors would look after him and that he wouldn't even notice he was on his own as he was that tired he'd be asleep the minute they all left. He'd promised them he would be fine and they'd reluctantly given in.

In truth, he hadn't really wanted to be on his own but the only people he wanted to be around were Bella and Lucy and he knew they both needed to go home. He just couldn't handle anyone else's company though, the increased pain medication had made it hard for him to focus and every garbled conversation he'd managed to carry out had taken a little more out of him. He wasn't even sure if much of what he'd managed to say had even made sense as his thoughts were that scattered and he was so easily distracted. The amused smiles that had been abundant during all his visits had suggested that what he thought he was saying and what he was actually saying were two entirely different things and the medications effects on him weren't going unnoticed.

Out of everyone, Emmett was definitely one of the last people he wanted to be around because of that. Emmett never did do silence well and Edward knew he'd want to talk. They hadn't been on the best of terms before the attack and though Edward thought it was misplaced, the guilt he was feeling was bound to make him want to talk things out and Edward just couldn't handle that right then. He'd much rather be alone than try to get his head around that kind of conversation.

As the exhaustion got the better of him, just minutes after everyone had left like he'd predicted he was incredibly grateful to all the friends and family that cared enough to visit but he was also grateful for the brief moment of peace now they'd all gone home with the hope it would afford him a decent amount of uninterrupted sleep.

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><p>Edward jerked awake with his heart racing and a lingering sense of unease. He couldn't remember dreaming about anything and as he tried to organise his thoughts to pinpoint what was wrong he was distracted by the realisation that there was a shadowed figure standing at the end of his bed. The lighting in the room had been dimmed to ease his sleep so he blinked, thinking it was a remnant of whatever had disturbed him in his sleep but as his eyes opened again the figure was still there and he was awake enough to recognize the baseball cap they were wearing for what it was. No one who should have been visiting him wore baseball caps and the nurses and doctors certainly didn't so as he tried to reach for the call button he wondered how angry Lucy and Bella were going to be with him. He'd promised them he'd be ok on his own.<p>

"Please don't press that. I'm not here to hurt you; I just need to talk to you. It's important. There are some things you_ need_ to know." Riley's voice startled him a little and he paused, his hand gripping the pad with the button on it tightly without touching it. For some reason instinct was telling him that Riley was telling the truth but that was at odds with everything he thought he knew. He didn't like the feeling and while it was enough to make him hesitant in calling for help, it wasn't enough to make him let go of the pad completely.

"You shouldn't be here." He pointed out, trying to hide his escalating panic as Riley moved a little closer, coming around the side of his bed in the direction of Bella's chair. Edward didn't want him to sit there but as he got closer he was distracted by the shoebox Riley appeared to be carrying. That struck him as a strange thing to be carrying if he had bad intentions. Surely any kind of weapon would have been better concealed in a pocket or bag, something that wouldn't catch attention.

"I know and if you press that button they'll escort me out of here and my bail will be revoked. You need to hear what I have to say, if not for your own sake then for Lucy and Bella's." Riley responded calmly making Edward frown as he dropped into Bella's chair, letting the box sit in his lap as he rested his hands on top of it. Nothing about his demeanour was threatening. If anything, it looked like he was trying to show he was harmless as he pulled his hat off, letting Edward see his face for the first time. He looked tired, worried and a little scared which threw Edward's own fear for just a second before he focused back on the shoe box.

"What's in the box?" He asked warily. He was curious as to what Riley thought he needed to know, throwing Lucy and Bella's names into it had been a sure way of catching his attention not to mention the way he was acting but he couldn't just ignore the fact he was James' brother. No matter how harmless he was trying to look Edward couldn't let his guard down and trust Riley's intentions.

"Oh..urm...it's just some things I thought you might want. I found them in Jess' things after well..." Riley trailed off as he saw the confusion in Edward's eyes suggesting he hadn't got a clue as to what he was referring to, "You don't remember do you?"

Edward continued to stare at him in confusion and Riley swore under his breath as he realised Edward really didn't remember what James had told him back at his flat. James had informed him with some glee that it would be unlikely but he'd hoped he was wrong. It made Edward's reaction to seeing him make a lot more sense though as he hadn't expected him to be so wary and he could see how the visit would look if Edward was still under the impression he was working with James.

"I'm sorry. I thought you would have remembered some of what happened at your flat. I didn't mean to come here and scare you and I'm honestly not here to hurt you." He reiterated before deciding the best thing to do if he wanted Edward to listen to him, which was even more important if he hadn't been able to tell the police what had happened, then he was going to have to prove that he meant no harm. He was surprised Edward had even paused in calling for help at all.

Standing up, he sat the shoebox down at the end of Edward's bed and dropped his cap onto his chair before unzipping his jacket and taking it off. He moved over to the chair on the opposite side of Edward's bed and sat the jacket there before heading for the light switch and brightening the room so that he could be seen clearly. Once that was done he moved back to where he started and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans before turning them inside out to show Edward he had nothing on him.

Edward watched every move he made in confusion not understanding what Riley was trying to do but as he settled back into the chair having shown he was carrying nothing dangerous and out of reach of the box and his jacket Edward assumed he was trying to make him relax. He wasn't sure it had worked but since he didn't seem to be of any immediate danger he decided to hear him out even though he kept the call button firmly in his hand just in case..

"Did anyone tell you it was me who went to the police? That I turned us all in?" Riley asked quietly and Edward nodded as Detective Jenks had told him that was how they'd caught Victoria and Laurent and known to go to his flat. It hadn't made much sense at the time but he'd been too tired and scattered to really think much about it since.

"You see this?" Riley asked then, pulling down the neck of his t-shirt to emphasize the yellowing bruises that spanned his throat and Edward nodded again as he looked at the similar bruising to what marred Bella's skin and the image of James pinning someone to his kitchen wall slammed back into him.

"That was you? In my kitchen?" He asked trying to make sense of it and failing. He knew Riley had been the baseball cap wearing member of James' gang and that he was his little brother. He'd been the one watching them all the time and he'd been there blocking any escape attempts when they jumped him on his way to work. He was even the one who'd given him the spiked drink all those years ago. It didn't make sense for the brothers to suddenly be fighting and for Riley to apparently switch his alliance. It didn't make much sense that he was sitting there or had turned them all in to the police either.

"Yes. I tried to stop him but I'm no match for him. I really am sorry; there was nothing I could do." Riley responded, relieved that Edward seemed to remember something. He knew James had drugged him but he knew little of the effects that would have or how long they'd last. He also knew he'd only just woken up from the medical induced coma they'd had him in as well as he'd been hanging around the hospital for the last couple of days waiting for a chance to talk to Edward, ever since James had called him in to visit and share his news. He comforted himself with the assumption that had to leave him feeling pretty groggy and confused and really hoped that with some time and nudges in the right direction his memory would come back. Edward had to remember what had happened, there was no other option for any of them.

"Why would you do that? This makes no sense." Edward moaned jerking Riley out of his wandering thoughts. He was fed up of feeling confused and it was starting to make his head pound again. Concentrating on conversations was hard enough without them making no sense to begin with and nothing Riley was saying was making any sense.

"James lied to us, well maybe not lied but he kept certain things from us and misled us. If I'd known from the start that he'd spiked that drink I gave you at the party then I wouldn't have helped him. When Jess died, we all wanted somebody to blame and he pointed the finger at you. He's my brother and the only family I really have left so I didn't question him. He wanted revenge and I was angry enough at what happened that I just followed him. The original plan he shared with us was just to make you suffer as some kind of retribution for the way Jess did and I certainly never thought James would take it as far as he did. I should have realised sooner what he was planning and stopped him. You've no idea how sorry I am for that, Jess wouldn't have wanted any of this." Riley explained quickly, wanting Edward to understand that he truly was sorry for what had happened and give some kind of justification for why he'd ever been involved in the first place not that anything really could justify it.

"Hang on...Jessica is dead?" Edward questioned before Riley could say anything else. He was getting a strange sense that he'd heard that news before but he could have sworn he hadn't. His head swam with the sensation and for a moment he could see James standing in his kitchen but the image was gone before he could really try and concentrate on it.

"Suicide, nearly two years ago." Riley answered before pausing as he waited to see if it would trigger anything in Edward's memories. He was sure James had already told him that and he really needed him to remember. They were all in trouble if he couldn't. "James told you this; he was halfway through explaining it all when I walked in."

"I don't remember." Edward responded bluntly, more frustrated than ever at his lack of memory and a little unsure over how to feel about Jessica being gone. He'd never known her, and after what she'd done he couldn't stand to even try thinking about her as it still made him sick but he wouldn't have wished death on anyone and she was Lucy's mother. At some point he was sure she would ask about her and he had no idea what he'd say when that day came.

"You've got to remember this stuff, otherwise it's all just his word against mine." Riley sighed, slumping down in the chair a little more as he started to realise how hopeless things could be. It wasn't going at all how he'd hoped.

"What do you mean?" Edward found himself asking in response to the desperation in Riley's tone. He was missing something important, Riley's insistence that he needed to remember everything was odd. Surely he would have been better off if Edward couldn't confirm what had happened; he could have told the police anything about his role in things and downplayed it to get himself out of trouble and Edward wouldn't have been able to dispute it.

"James called me in to visit him. I went to see what he wanted and turns out it was just to gloat a little. He's hired some fancy hot shot lawyer who he's sure can get him off on reduced charges due to his mental instability. They're pretty sure they can make it out like he wasn't in control of his actions, that something you did caused some kind of mental breakdown or something. I don't really understand it but the main point is they think they can get his sentence reduced. He says they can prove it wasn't premeditated so he wouldn't be tried with attempted murder. He's told the police it was me who drugged you and he was smart enough that the only DNA on that water bottle is yours so it could have been handled by either of us and the police wouldn't be able to tell and the fact he didn't use a weapon on you other than your own kitchen chair works in his favour as he didn't go to your flat armed. Right now it's just my word against his, and with his medical examinations and the spin he's putting on things my word doesn't mean anything. You've got to remember what happened, what James said to you, to prove I'm telling the truth. Otherwise he's going to get out sometime in the near future after undergoing whatever pointless mental therapy they want him to do. He doesn't ever forget or forgive and he certainly never gives up. If they let him out he will come after you, Bella and me, he may even go after Lucy. He never approved of her and I think he blames her as well as you for what happened to Jess and he may even just use her as a way to hurt you. He wanted to do that all along but I pleaded with him not to and he listened as it was easy to convince him Jess wouldn't have wanted her harmed but he won't listen to me now. If he gets out it won't end well for any of us."

"I don't understand. How is it our fault Jessica took her life?" Edward asked only just managing to grasp the fact that it was her death James was trying to make him pay for. The anger started to filter through the confusion and it was another familiar feeling, like he'd had the same conversation before. He didn't know if the odd feelings were just the tricks the medication and his exhaustion played on him or if they were the ghosts of real memories trying to break through but either way he wished it would stop. It was disconcerting and made his head ache more than it already was as he struggled to make sense of it.

Riley sighed again in response to Edward's question not really knowing where to start or what to say. He really hadn't been expecting to have to explain everything to Edward, he was so sure some of it would have stuck with him and he certainly hadn't been prepared to talk about Jessica. She was a painful subject he'd never really come to terms with. James had fed into the anger he'd felt at her untimely death and everything had been concentrated into that. It was easier to place the blame on someone else and look for revenge than to grieve and say goodbye to a sister he'd loved. With all their time and effort going into finding Edward and planning what to do with him it hadn't left much time to feel the pain and loss. He'd liked it better that way but now he could see what a mistake that had been. James had correctly played his weakness and used him for his own purposes and now they were all in the middle of a huge mess with innocent people getting hurt. He'd thought he'd already faced up to everything when he'd walked into the police station but explaining it all to Edward was somehow much worse but it had to be done. After everything they'd put him through Edward deserved some answers.

"Jess wasn't well. I don't think she ever really was. The whole thing with you...at the time I thought it was just a crush like all teenage girls get but it wasn't. She was obsessed and she got the same way about Lucy when she was pregnant but when Lucy was born she lost all interest to the point it was left up to me to look after Lucy as our mum was in no fit state to and James had no interest in her whatsoever. We didn't catch the signs of the post-natal depression early enough and by the time we did it was too late; she'd already given Lucy up to you. She was fine for a while, and Lucy was better off with you anyway but once Jess started to get over the depression she wanted Lucy back in her life and we couldn't find you. The guilt at giving her baby up ate away at her and we were too busy looking in the wrong places for you that we weren't paying enough attention to her. She was sure she'd never see Lucy again and she couldn't live with what she'd done so she overdosed. James blames you, and in turn Lucy as if it hadn't been for her, Jess wouldn't have wanted to commit suicide in the first place and if we hadn't been trying to track you down in America we would have been there to stop her."

"But that's not my fault..._you _drugged _me_...my parents threw me out...I didn't have any control over any of what happened." Edward hissed and the way Riley shook his head in denial only made him angrier to the point where he was seriously considering pressing the call button just to get rid of him even though there were still things he needed to know.

"I didn't know those drinks at the party were spiked. James had already put the drugs into the vodka before I poured the drinks. He admitted that back at your flat. I was drugged too, I passed out in my room and he locked me in there for the night. When he told us that it was when I realised how wrong what we were doing was and I did try to stop him. When it was clear he couldn't be reasoned with I knew I stood no chance at fighting him so I left. I was planning to get Lucy from Victoria and take her to Carlisle and Esme as there was nothing I could do for you without getting myself killed. When I got to her school and saw they'd already got Victoria and Bella was on her way to you I called the ambulance and went to the police to turn myself in." Riley hurried to explain, seeing the way Edward's thumb was hovering over the button that was still in his grip and wanting to calm him down enough so he'd believe what he was telling him.

"This is making my head hurt." Edward muttered but he did relax his grip on the button pad. There were just too many conflicting thoughts and he didn't know what to think or believe. It went against everything he thought he knew to actually trust what Riley was saying but he looked and sounded genuine. He didn't know what Riley would achieve from it if he was lying and the bruises on his throat were compelling evidence to support his claims of fighting with James. Then again, telling him he hadn't known the drinks had been spiked could just have been a lie to help make him trust him.

"I'm sorry but you needed to know what James was planning. I've said what I needed to, I can go now if you want." Riley mumbled feeling uncomfortable. He couldn't blame Edward for being less than enthusiastic to hear what he'd had to say but he had hoped for something. All he was getting was confusion and a blank stare. He'd done what he had intended and warned Edward of the danger James still posed and he'd tried to explain what had happened and why, there was nothing else he could really do so leaving was probably for the best. Edward would need time to let it all sink in and maybe once it had and he could think a little clearer the real memories would come back to him.

"No...wait. No one else will tell me what happened, they say I need to remember it on my own but that might never happen. What happened in my flat?" Edward had a sudden clarity of thought as Riley's suggestion reminded him of what he'd said earlier about James. If he was still a threat and Edward was the only hope they had then he needed help to remember what had happened. No one else knew or was willing to talk about it. If Riley had been there he might be able to say something that would trigger the memories. Considering it had taken kissing Bella to unlock the ones from the night of the party he was hoping it would take something a little less realistic to bring back the ones from his kitchen and talking about it was as good a place as any to start.

"I wasn't there for all of it." Riley warned a little awkwardly as he knew what he had to say wouldn't paint him in the best of lights, "When I turned up James already had you tied to a kitchen chair and it looked as though your shoulder was dislocated. You weren't very coherent but James was telling you why he was doing what he was. You argued with him a little, like you did just now with me. That's how I found out he used me to drug you. I honestly didn't know anything about that until then. I knew he'd invited you and your friends for Jessica's benefit but when he suggested I get you a drink I just assumed it was because you were sitting on your own looking rather bored and uncomfortable. If I'd known what he'd been planning I swear I wouldn't have helped him. Guess it's too late for that now though."

"Just a bit. Did Jessica know?" It was off topic but as the question entered Edward's head he had to know the answer. If James had played the rest of them it didn't seem much of a stretch to consider he'd do the same with his sister. Edward wasn't sure which would be worse, knowing Jessica had been a willing participant or just as much of a victim as he had. Neither could really be explained to Lucy when she asked what had happened to her mother but if he could think of her without wanting to throw up he guessed it might make that impossible conversation a little easier.

"I don't know, as I said, I had no clue drugs had been involved until a week ago and it's too late to ask her now but she really did like you so I don't think she'd have wanted you drugged. She was never really malicious, she just wanted you to notice her. James found her upset over the rumours you'd been with Tanya and I guess he decided to fix it for her. He's kind of direct when he wants something done and he already had a grudge against your family as Emmett cheated on Victoria who James had always liked. In James logic, I'm sure what he did made perfect sense. Jess got what she wanted and he got one over on Emmett by hurting you."

"So we argued...then what?" Edward asked trying to ignore that Riley had just implied a feud with Emmett had probably sealed his fate and get back on topic. He really didn't need any more issues with Emmett as he already had several he was trying to forget. He was still stumped as to what to think about Jessica too but he didn't really want to dwell on anything Riley had just said as he really couldn't deal with the implications of it right then although he knew it would be impossible not to let his mind wander back to it later. He just knew it was going to haunt him.

"I told him to stop what he was doing and he slammed me against the wall and told me to choose. I could leave and keep quiet, join you or stay and shut up. I knew I couldn't fight him on my own and you were in no state to help so I left to get Lucy. I don't know what happened after that as I was locked up in the police station." Riley answered well aware that he hadn't really been able to enlighten Edward on much of what had happened to him, only really the back story to it all. He hoped it would be enough.

"So nobody actually knows what happened between me and James?" Edward summed it all up and sighed as Riley nodded. Everyone knew the end results but as for what was said or done the only thing they had to go on was James' statement which from what Riley had said was a well constructed blanket of lies that laid the blame on everyone except for James.

"You've got to remember it." Riley stressed, needing Edward to understand how important that was but all the reminder did was ignite his anger again.

"I only just remembered what happened to me at that party a couple of weeks ago and I didn't have a head injury for that one. I can barely keep focused enough to hold a conversation with Lucy, I wouldn't pin all your hopes on that happening." Edward spat, frustrated at not only Riley expecting something from him but at the fact his lack of memory was clearly putting Bella and Lucy in danger and there was nothing he could do about it.

"Then you better be prepared to live looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life. He won't give up and wherever you hide he'll find you eventually." Riley warned before he jammed his hat back on and stood up to reach for the box he'd brought in with him as it was obvious Edward had had enough. "I've said what I came to say so I'll leave you in piece. I found this under Jess' bed. She kept everything and I thought you might want to see it. There's a necklace in there she wanted Lucy to have. It's up to you what you do with it though, I know it's not the easiest of situations."

With that he handed the shoe box to Edward before he gathered up the rest of his belongings. He was just leaving as Edward lifted the lid off the box and peered inside to see a multitude of photos peeking out from underneath a tiny baby grow and a couple of ultrasound scan print outs.

"Thank you." He called, his voice slightly choked as he stared at the contents in the box and Riley paused at the genuine gratitude in his voice.

"I don't deserve your thanks. Look after yourself and Lucy and don't worry about Laurent and Victoria. She's locked up under psychiatric care and James was paying Laurent off, he won't act on his own." He responded and then he was gone, the door swinging shut behind him, leaving Edward alone with his thoughts and the missing first months of Lucy's life. 

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><p><em>AN - Thank you to everyone who continues to read this and for the reviews :)<em>


	42. Chapter 40 Dazed And Confused

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 40 – Dazed And Confused<strong>

"Hey, I wasn't expecting you be awake yet." Bella commented as she wandered into Edward's room as it was far too early for any normal person to be awake. She was only there already as she'd woken up hearing Carlisle moving around the house getting ready for the early shift at work and had jumped at the chance to get a lift to the hospital, eager to make sure that Edward was still ok.

Despite her early departure Bella had enjoyed staying at the Cullen house, though it would have been hard not to considering how lavish the place was and how Esme happily doted on everyone staying there. It was very clear that she loved having a full house just as Lucy had commented and the meal she'd cooked for everyone had been astounding and far too large to feed even the seven of them. The dining room had been lively, full of talk and in Rosalie and Emmett's case, covert glances throughout the meal. Bella had been seated next to Lucy and across from Emmett and Rosalie and she'd had a hard time stifling her laughter as Lucy had sat there with a barely contained grin, her legs swinging happily under the table as she watched the pair opposite them. Emmett looked like a love sick teenager and while Rosalie was showing him an indifferent front, whenever he looked away from her she glanced to him and Bella could see the softer look in her eye that wasn't normally present. It was so hard not to laugh at the game they were playing and she wondered how long Rosalie could keep it up, something that turned into a whispered betting game between her and Lucy as they tried to hide their amusement from the rest of the table.

After they'd all eaten as much as they possibly could of the full roast dinner and homemade apple pie and ice cream Esme had set them all up in what she called the entertainment room. It was huge, just the same as every other room Bella had passed through, and was decked out with the largest TV she had ever seen with various games consoles connected to it and a pool table taking up the far side of the room. The large, comfortable leather sofa and chairs had been pushed aside and a mass of cushions and drapes had been set up into some kind of tent like structure in the middle of the room which Lucy had dragged her straight into while Esme had picked out some DVDs from a large selection housed in the shelves to either side of the TV. From the scattering of soft toys within the cushions it was clear the tent had been up for a while and was one of Lucy's favourite spots.

It had been a very enjoyable evening, though Lucy had suggested it be a girls night, Emmett and Carlisle had settled down with the rest of them to watch Over The Hedge and then Finding Nemo and Lucy had happily curled up in Bella's arms while the rest of them spread out around them, the tent structure being plenty big enough for all of them, even Emmett who chose to sit suspiciously close to Rosalie although she didn't seem to mind at all. After the second film and Rosalie's departure, the excitement of the evening had taken it out of Lucy and she'd asked to go to bed but had insisted on Bella staying with her. She'd given her the tour of her new room which was at least twice the size of her old one before they'd gotten ready for bed and they'd both curled up in the impressive princess bed complete with canopy.

It wasn't until the morning when Bella had woken up to the sounds of Carlisle moving around the house that she even realised she hadn't had chance to talk to him about her poor sleeping yet she'd slept right through the night without waking anyway. She had really enjoyed spending time with Lucy and it had done her a world of good but once awake the worry for how Edward would had survived the night alone had resurfaced so she'd kissed Lucy's forehead and left her a note to say thank you and that she'd see her later at the hospital before she'd joined Carlisle for breakfast.

Now she was glad she'd chosen to go to the hospital early as although Edward was awake and more alert than he'd been the previous day she still got the feeling that something was wrong.

"You look better." Edward commented, glancing up from something he'd been staring at in his hand to smile at her although Bella noted it didn't quite reach his eyes which were distinctly red and puffy looking.

"Wish I could say the same about you." She responded before leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead. He didn't react to her comment or affection and she frowned with concern as she took her usual seat. "What's that you're looking at?"

He looked back at her, his expression blank before his gaze dropped to what he was holding again. After a moment he held it out to Bella and she took it, finding it to be a photograph. She looked at it in confusion as she took in the teenage girl with curly brown hair who sat in a chair in the centre of the photo. There were dark circles under her eyes and her face looked pale and drawn but there was a small, fond smile lighting her eyes as she watched the tiny baby she was holding. From the size, Bella didn't think the baby could be very old at all but there was still evidence of the reddish brown curls she was so familiar with sticking up in tufts.

"This is Lucy?" She asked although she already knew the answer. Edward nodded, holding his hand out to take the photo back so Bella handed it over, looking carefully at his face as she asked her next question. "And that's her mother?"

"Jessica, yes." Edward answered bluntly as he ran his thumb over the spot Lucy occupied. There was still no sign of real emotion on his face but something flickered in his eyes as he said her name.

"Where did it come from?" Bella wondered since Edward didn't seem to be too forthcoming with answers. As far as she was aware Edward had nothing from Lucy's first few months and she knew everything that had been brought into the hospital for him and that photo definitely hadn't been in any of the bags Emmett and Carlisle had packed.

A tapping noise alerted her to the worn shoe box he'd got cradled to his side as he tapped his finger against it. She definitely hadn't seen that before and as she moved to the edge of her seat so she could see it better she could see the mass of photographs and the tiny white baby grow. That made her smile a little as she spotted the tiny yellow duck that was embroidered just below the left shoulder before she realised that no one in his family would have had access to any of the things in that box.

"Who gave you that?" She asked sharply, rising to her feet as she started to panic although it was a pointless action as it was quite clear whoever had visited Edward wasn't there anymore.

"Riley." He answered just as bluntly, dropping the photo into the box before rummaging through it a little and pulling out another one. "He used to look after her."

He handed the second one to Bella and this time it was a teenage boy sitting on a worn looking carpet, a blanket spread out in front of him with the baby Lucy laid on it on her back happily kicking her feet in the air as Riley reached out to tickle one of them. There was total adoration on his face as he looked at her and it was an image Bella had a hard time reconciling with a man who'd helped to put Edward in the hospital.

"He shouldn't have been here. What did he want?" She asked, dropping the photo back into the box, unable to look at it any longer. Edward picked up on the bitter hatred in her voice and looked at her as it pulled him out of the daze he'd been in.

"To give me these and to talk." He answered putting the lid back onto the box and pushing it away a little so he could tug Bella down to sit on the edge of his bed. He didn't like the worry in her eyes. "What's wrong?"

"What's wrong? You're asking me what's wrong after you calmly admit the little brother of the man who put you in here, who tried to kill you _twice_, came by to visit and instead of calling for help and getting him removed from the building you _talked_ to him?" Bella retaliated, the fear of what could have happened overpowering the fact there was no evidence to suggest Edward had been harmed again. After everything that had happened, the effort that had gone in to insuring he was safe and protected, it was absolutely inexcusable that he'd play with his own safety like that and she couldn't believe he'd have been so stupid the very first night after he'd convinced them all he'd be fine on his own. She knew for certain that they would not be making the same mistake again.

"He didn't mean me any harm. He apologised for what happened and just wanted to talk, to warn me." Edward tried to argue but he could still see the fire blazing in Bella's eyes and he was quickly realising that she wasn't somebody you wanted to mess with.

"And you trusted him? I can't believe you'd be so careless!" She seethed, not placated at all as she tried to tug her hand out of his grip and get up but he held on tight, refusing to let her move. "What would have happened if it had turned out to be a trick and he had hurt you or worse? What exactly would we have told Lucy? You promised her you'd be fine, you promised all of us and we all promised her too."

"I was fine, he didn't touch me and I didn't trust him. I had the call button in my hand the entire time he was in here and he showed me he was unarmed as soon as he realised I couldn't remember any of what happened in my kitchen. You know he was the one who turned them all in and called the ambulance right?" He reminded her in the hope she'd calm down. He had expected she'd have a few choice words for him on discovering Riley's visit but he hadn't expected the sheer level of fury she was displaying. She was livid.

"That doesn't mean anything! He could have just been trying to save himself by owning up, knowing they'd be caught in the end and wanting a lighter punishment."

"It's not Riley who's trying to dodge punishment. If you want to worry about somebody doing that, worry about James. That's what Riley came to warn me about." Edward cut in taking the fight right out of Bella as she stared at him in horror.

"What exactly do you mean by that?" She asked quietly and he noticed the grip she had on his hand grew tighter but at least the slightly hysterical edge to her voice had calmed down.

"James told Riley that his lawyer can get the charges against him reduced. They're saying he's mentally unstable and that he wasn't in control of his own actions so can't be held fully accountable for them. The way he's telling it, I did something that caused a mental break and none of it was premeditated." Edward explained as Bella gaped at him.

"Is that even possible?" She spluttered.

"I don't know, Riley seems to think so." He answered while clumsily stroking his thumb against the back of her hand in an attempt to comfort her. He might have wanted to shock her anger away but he hadn't really wanted to scare her. After a moment she sighed and pinned him with a serious gaze.

"Why would he even tell you this? Just being here was breaking his bail conditions, why would he risk that?" She asked and Edward was glad she was actually going to talk to him about it rather than just shout at him. At his request, they'd lowered his medication and while he was a lot more coherent his headache was also more prominent.

"Because he's more afraid of James than he is the police. James threatened him too and right now it's just his word against James', if I can't remember what happened to back up what he's already told the police then we're all in trouble. James will be free in no time and he'll be coming after all of us."

"So he's trying to use you to save himself? Nice." Bella scoffed, the anger flashing back into her eyes.

"I guess but what does it matter when it'll save us too? As odd and unbelievable as it sounds, Riley does seem to be on our side. He actually tried to stop James, I do remember that much."

"You do?"

"He's got a matching set of bruises to you and I had a hazy idea of seeing James pin someone to my kitchen wall by their throat. It wasn't you so..." Edward trailed off.

"I don't get it. Why did he suddenly go from helping James to trying to stop him?" Bella sighed as she tried to let go of the anger so she could actually take in what Edward was saying and think about it rationally.

"Long story." Edward muttered, suddenly uninterested in continuing the conversation. He'd been dwelling on what Riley had told him for the rest of the night as he looked through the photographs he had left and he still didn't really know what to make of it. There should have been some kind of emotion to go with it he was sure but he was just empty. The only feeling it had evoked in him made him disgusted at himself and he didn't want to have to tell Bella about it in case she thought the same and there was no way it wouldn't come up if they talked about it.

"Then you better get started telling it." Bella stated impatiently before softening when she saw his expression. He looked tired and unsure so she pulled her hand free of his and leaned forward, cupping his face between her hands. "You know you can tell me anything and if you expect me to go home for the night and leave you here on your own again then I need to know what's going on. I don't trust Riley or his intentions so make me understand it."

"I don't know if I can, I don't even understand it." Edward mumbled and he looked so lost at that moment that Bella was unable to fight the pull that drew her closer and enabled her to press her lips softly to his. What was meant to just be a quick, reassuring gesture to let him know she was there for him escalated as Edward's walls came crashing down. The lack of emotion he'd spent the night worrying over was blasted through as he came alive under her touch. For the first time since he'd woken from his coma he truly felt awake, the medicated haze was gone and in its place was just Bella. He tentatively brushed his tongue along her lower lip and she opened to him instantly. He wanted to crush her to him but the ever present ache in his ribs reminded him it wouldn't be wise so instead he wrapped his hand around her hip, inching it just underneath her t-shirt to feel bare skin as he helped to hold her steady where she hovered over him.

Bella was the first to pull away as she sat back, her cheeks flushed and her breath shaky as she looked at him with a small smile that made her eyes sparkle. He smiled back, keeping his hand where it was to maintain their connection as he tried to gather his thoughts, knowing she wouldn't have been distracted for long and that he stood no chance of not telling her anything she wanted to know after that kiss. She was too important to him to deny her.

"Where's your oxygen?" She asked once she'd caught her breath and it took him by surprise a little as he reflexively looked to his side for it. He wasn't even too badly out of breath and he realised that if it had been the day before he would have been struggling without the annoying mask.

"They're seeing how I go without it. The nurse was round just before you came in. The painkiller's dose has gone down too." He answered feeling proud that he was actually making progress. The nurse had even hinted that it wouldn't be too long before he'd be able to go home since he would be under Carlisle's care there anyway and he was looking forward to being out of the hospital bed so much that he wasn't even annoyed they'd moved him and Lucy in without asking him first.

"You're feeling a little better then?" Bella asked and he could see the hope in her eyes so he nodded.

"Things hurt a little more I guess but it's good to not be so hazy." He responded deciding to tell her the truth as he was pretty sure he'd end up doing something that would make him wince and he didn't want her panicking when it happened. After what Riley had told him he knew it was important that he remember what James had said and done to him and he was fairly sure the drugs hadn't been helping the memories return considering he couldn't really remember a great deal of what had been said to him since he'd woken up either so he was happy to deal with a little more of the pain if it would keep him lucid.

"You'll tell us if it gets too much though right?" Bella asked as her eyes narrowed a little making it very clear which answer she was wanting so he nodded again and that seemed to satisfy her as she settled back, getting comfortable where she was before she looked at him seriously again.

"So...Riley?" She prompted, instantly sobering Edward's mood again as he sighed and flexed his hand around her hip before he started to speak. He told her Riley's version of events for the party and then what he'd said had happened in his kitchen keeping as much to Riley's own wording as he could while missing out one important detail. Bella listened without interrupting although he could see her barely contained disgust as he mentioned how Riley had left his flat. When he trailed off he could see the confusion in her eyes as she continued to stare at him and knew she wasn't going to let him leave anything out.

"Why? Why did they want to come after you in the first place and where is Jessica if she wanted Lucy back in her life so much?" She asked, becoming even more confused as Edward's grip on her went from being just a comforting warmth to being on the edge of hurting as he closed his eyes.

"She's dead. Committed suicide two years ago." He answered quietly and she just stared at him for a moment not sure what to say to that or what he was thinking. His eyes were still closed, effectively cutting himself off from her but his jaw was tight and he was still holding on to her which made her think the news bothered him.

"Why?" She found herself asking again although she wasn't entirely sure it was the right thing to do as everything about Edward's demeanour right then suggested he'd rather had dropped the conversation but she needed to know to understand what was going on with him.

"Guilt. According to Riley, she couldn't live with abandoning Lucy and she didn't think she'd ever see her again."

"And James blames you for that?" She questioned as his eyes snapped open to stare at her. He nodded slowly and watched as her eyes filled with fury.

"He really is insane." She spat, "How can he blame you when he was the one who started it all? It's not like you stole Lucy from her or even moved away from home by choice either."

Edward said nothing in response and after taking a deep breath to try and calm down Bella looked at him with a steady gaze, seeing the blank expression on his face again.

"What are you thinking? Talk to me." She asked realising that the anger she would expect to see from him just wasn't there.

"Lucy's mother is dead. I know I didn't cause it, but it's still because of me and Luce and do you know what it makes me feel? Nothing but a vague sense of relief because it means she can't suddenly appear and take Lucy away from me. Jessica is dead, Lucy is never going to know her mum and I'm...relieved."

"Given the circumstances I'd say that's an understandable reaction." Bella commented unsurely as Edward shook his head.

"She's _dead_! According to Riley she didn't know about the drugs and I know she was drunk, I can still taste the alcohol on her if I think about it. She was just a kid and because of some stupid grudge James had against Emmett her life was ruined. I didn't even know her, she could have been a perfectly nice girl and now she's gone and I'm relieved? What kind of person does that make me?"

"Edward you can't think like that. Even drunk she should have known better, she wasn't totally innocent, she couldn't have been. You said no, you tried to push her away, she should have stopped. She's the reason your whole life was turned upside down and you rebuilt it around Lucy. It must have been in the back of your mind the whole time that one day Jessica could reappear and try to take her back so it's no wonder you feel relieved. I'm sure anyone else in your situation would feel the same way." Bella tried to comfort him but he just shook his head again.

"You can't know whether she was sober enough to recognize my protests for what they were. I remember trying to push her away and trying to say no but whether that actually came across or not I don't know and my body reacted to her. She probably thought I was up for it, just too drunk to take charge."

"That would still have been taking advantage of you. You've been dwelling on this all night haven't you?" Bella responded figuring that would explain why he'd looked so tired and his eyes so sore when she'd arrived.

"I couldn't sleep." Edward answered making Bella sigh as she studied him. He was a good man so she wasn't really surprised that he'd try to take some of the blame or that his feelings of relief would trouble him. She just didn't know how to make him see that what he was feeling was ok but she had to try.

"What happened to Jessica was in no way your fault. You shouldn't feel guilty for it, or for feeling relieved. You didn't know her so you wouldn't be expected to feel anything for her and what you did know of her wasn't pleasant. Yes she was Lucy's mother but Lucy was far too young to remember her so you shouldn't feel bad for her either. All she has ever known is you, you're all she needs and she's happy. That's what's important. Sure she might ask you about Jessica one day but at least now you can tell her that Jessica loved her but she wasn't well and just couldn't take care of her."

"I'm sorry." He mumbled in response, totally throwing Bella for a moment as she had no idea what he had to be sorry about.

"For what?"

"It feels like you're always having to talk me down from the edge and that can't be much fun. I don't understand the way you see me but I'm grateful." He responded making her shake her head and smile a little sadly at his skewed perception.

"You're a good man Edward and I'll keep telling you that however many times it takes until you believe it. You're far too hard on yourself." She stated, unwilling to acknowledge his apology any further when she didn't even deem it necessary in the first place.

"Thank you." He murmured, lightly stroking the skin above her hip with his thumb as he still held onto her.

Bella just smiled in response, wanting to tell him his thanks were just as unnecessary as his apology but knowing it would be pointless. She could see by the sadness in his eyes that he didn't really believe what she'd said but she hoped he'd think about it later once everything had had time to sink in and in the mean time there were still important things they needed to talk about.

"Do you actually remember any of the things Riley told you about or is this all just taking his word for it?"

"I don't know, both I guess. It all sounds familiar and when he was talking about it I did get this feeling that I already knew what he was telling me but I can't remember ever hearing it before. It's a really odd, disconcerting feeling and I hate it. I'm hoping the reduced medication will make a difference, it feels like the memories are there somewhere and the drugs have kept me fairly fuzzy on most things." He grumbled.

"I guess that's a good sign then. You said you could see James pinning Riley to the wall...have you told Detective Jenks that? I know it's not much but it might help confirm Riley's story until the rest of it comes back."

"Not yet but I will, I just wish I could remember more of it. It's so frustrating." He complained making Bella smile a little as the complaining made him seem more himself. He really didn't make a good patient.

"Give it time, there's no point pushing it and getting frustrated as I doubt that will help. Do you want to take your mind off it all for a while and hear what Lucy's done to Esme and Carlisle's entertainment room?" She asked thinking it was time to change the topic completely. A frustrated Edward wouldn't do any good and they'd all be in trouble if Lucy arrived in the afternoon to find him in poor spirits.

"That sounds ominous." He commented but he was smiling again so she continued to tell him about her indoor tent and her new room. He shook his head a lot, but the smile never left his face and though Bella was sure he didn't entirely approve of just how much they'd all been spoiling Lucy he didn't seem to want to argue against it either. For once it looked as though he wasn't going to fight being helped.

* * *

><p><em>It was dark although Edward wasn't sure if it was night or if he just couldn't get his eyes open. He was laid on a hard surface and he was cold, so so cold. He couldn't move, couldn't even get the message through his body to try it. He was detached, looking down on himself yet stuck there just the same. He was aware of the pain; his whole body felt like it was on fire with it though he didn't know why. <em>

_Death was coming for him, he was sure of that. It would be easy. There would be no more pain, no more struggling, he could just stop the fight and drift away but something was holding him exactly where he was, tethering him to his broken body. _

_Lucy. _

_He couldn't leave her, not through his own choice and then there was Bella. He didn't want to leave her either. They'd barely gotten started with their relationship and there were so many things he wanted to experience with her. He wasn't ready for it to be over yet and as that thought came to him he could almost hear her calling his name. _

_Everything he had went into clinging onto the last painful beats of his heart but it wasn't enough, he could feel it. The fight was over. He had nothing left to give._

_The darkness felt absolute. There was nothing there anymore. No pain, no fear, no ghosts of a voice. Just a never ending darkness. _

_It was wrong. _

_He wasn't meant to be there. _

_He had to get back._

* * *

><p>"Edward! Edward wake up!"<p>

He woke with a gasp and the feel of Bella's gentle touch brushing over his cheeks as she wiped away his tears. She didn't get chance to ask him what was wrong before he'd got his arm around her and had her crushed to his chest, his face buried in her hair as he took in a deep breath of her familiar scent.

He was so glad to be there, to be able to wake up and not be stuck in the darkness.

"Thank you for finding me." He mumbled knowing it would confuse Bella but needing to say it.

It hadn't been just a nightmare, it had felt too real and somehow he just knew what it was. He had been sure he was dying and if Bella hadn't arrived at his flat when she had he would have. There was a certainty to the thought that he couldn't doubt. Bella and Phil had pulled him back when he hadn't had the strength to hold on himself. They'd given him the extra time he'd needed to have the chance to see Lucy again and he would never be able to thank either of them enough for it. He'd known before that they'd saved his life but it had been an abstract idea, just a story he'd been told. Now it felt very real.

"Edward, what...? Let me up, this must be hurting you." Bella responded in confusion as she tried to pull away from him but he wouldn't let her move an inch. He didn't care that it hurt, the pain just meant he was alive and he was grateful for it.

"Ok, you're really worrying me now." Bella commented, giving up on struggling out of his grip for fear she'd do more damage than if she just stayed still. She had no idea what he'd been dreaming about as he'd been quiet and very still. It was only when she'd spotted the glistening tracks trickling down his cheeks that she'd realised something was wrong and had tried to wake him. From what Emmett and Lucy had mentioned that wasn't how his nightmares usually worked so she had no reference to go on for how to deal with whatever it was. All she knew was it was upsetting him and that wasn't acceptable.

"Talk to me, please." She pleaded as she started to feel his breathing get shallower through the more rapid movement of his chest. The way he was holding her against him wouldn't even let her look up to see his face so she had no idea if he was panicking or if it was the pressure on his chest, either way it needed to stop.

"I was dying, I could feel it." He muttered and Bella felt the chill run through her as her mind automatically supplied the image of him lying on his kitchen floor in a pool of his own blood with Phil working furiously to keep him with them.

"What? In your dream?" She asked trying to banish the image in her head and stay with him but his next words didn't really help with that.

"Yes, no...it was real. So real. It was dark and everything hurt so much then suddenly it didn't but it was still dark. I didn't want to go but there was nothing left in me."

His words were slightly garbled and ran together as his voice wavered and he struggled to get enough air but Bella caught them and what he described made a shudder run through her. She instinctively knew what he was talking about, knowing that she'd been on the other side of that fight pleading with him to hold on for them.

"You're ok now, you're here." She murmured, pressing a kiss to his chest trying to ground herself as much as she was him, "You're right here, with me."

"Can't...breathe..." Edward finally admitted, unable to draw in enough air to even get the words out properly so he reluctantly let his arm drop from around Bella as she made a new attempt to get up. She didn't move far though. Instead she sat up and leaned over him so there was no pressure on his chest and she could run one hand through his hair, brushing the strands that had fallen into his face away so she could see his haunted eyes.

"Ribs or panic?" She asked softly, keeping her hand in his hair in an attempt to relax him while reaching for the call button with her other.

"Both."

She pressed the button and leaned down to kiss his forehead before sitting back and seeing him wince with every breath in. He was trying to make the effort to slow and deepen each breath but it was obviously hurting and the panic from the nightmare only made it harder.

Bella's comforting words while they waited for a nurse to appear didn't do much good against pain but they did help calm him as the fear slowly left his eyes which he kept focused on her face. He was so glad she was there, the dream had felt so real that waking up from it alone would have been disorientating and terrifying and it gave him a whole new level of understanding for why Bella had been so adamant about staying at the hospital with him over night.

The reality that she was there and he was alive was slowly sinking in and as it did it allowed him to try and fight through the pain from his ribs to get his breathing back and he used his focus on Bella to try and match his breathing to hers.

The door to his room soon opened and Bella looked over her shoulder expecting to see a nurse come in only to find Carlisle heading towards them looking concerned.

"What's going on in here? I was just coming up to say hello and I saw the call light flashing at the nurses' station."

He'd meant to pop in and see how Edward was doing much earlier but the instant he'd stepped foot through the main doors with Bella that morning he'd been called into the E.R. and he'd been stuck there for the rest of the morning. When he'd finally managed to get a break he'd headed straight for Edward's room but he hadn't been expecting to find him visibly distressed. The frequent updates the nurses were providing him with had all suggested he was doing well, especially since they'd taken him off the oxygen and lowered the pain medication.

"His ribs are hurting." Bella informed him, sliding down from the bed to let Carlisle get a closer look at Edward.

"Did something aggravate them or is the lower dose of painkillers not working?" Carlisle asked slipping from concerned Uncle to full doctor mode as he glanced at Edward's chart and read the notes on his recent progress. When he looked up from the papers and caught sight of Bella's blush he was pretty sure he had his answer.

"You really need to be more careful. They're very fragile right now and any kind of pressure or harsh movement is going to be extremely painful." He chastised the pair of them as he worked on getting an extra dose of medication set up.

"Wasn't...Bella's...fault." Edward muttered in between breaths that made him grimace with pain, "Bad...dream...needed...close."

Carlisle looked up at that and studied Edward's unhappy face for a moment before looking to Bella whose blush had faded to be replaced by concern as she watched Edward.

"You're nightmares have started up again?" He asked but Edward shook his head.

"Not...nightmare."

"I think his memories are coming back." Bella added seeing Carlisle's confusion and trying to save Edward the effort of explaining what he meant. Edward nodded to confirm what she'd said before he sank back into his pillows as Bella ran her hand through his hair soothingly and the new medication entered his system.

"Oh, Detective Jenks will be pleased to hear that." Carlisle commented a little awkwardly as medically speaking he was glad Edward was making progress but as his uncle he hated the fact it was distressing for him. If the memories were returning there was going to be nothing pleasant about them and unfortunately there was nothing to be done about that although there was a possibility they could hold them back for a while, at least from his dreams so he could get the sleep he needed. "If the memories are too much right now we could try you on some sleeping medication for the time being, at least then they won't affect your sleep, just until you're a little stronger."

"No...need to remember."

"There's no rush and it would just let you get the sleep you need." Carlisle argued but Edward shook his head and when Carlisle looked to Bella for help he didn't like the uneasy look on her face as she bit her lower lip.

"Can I tell him?" She asked Edward quietly, confusing Carlisle further although she seemed to relax a little as Edward nodded and he noticed she was still playing soothingly with his hair.

"Riley visited him last night. James is trying to get the charges against him reduced and it looks possible as right now it's just his word against Riley and it sounds like he's trying to set Riley up. Edward needs to remember what happened to back his story up otherwise James will get out sooner than any of us expected and Riley's positive he will be coming after us all." She explained leaving Carlisle gaping at the pair of them with the same reaction Bella had had to the news.

"Riley was here? I need to go talk to our head of security, he's not meant to come anywhere near you!"

"No, wait!" Bella hurriedly called as Carlisle was already heading for the door, "He was trying to help...I think. Either way he didn't harm Edward while he was here."

"I don't like it." Carlisle muttered, turning to look at them again, his hands in fists at his side.

"Neither do I but Edward's sure aren't you?" Bella asked to which Edward nodded and Carlisle sighed.

"Fine, tell me the whole story." He relented, moving round to the other side of Edward's bed to sit down. There wasn't much time left of his break but he wasn't going to leave that room until he was satisfied that Edward was safe.

Bella started speaking, repeating everything Edward had told her earlier while Carlisle listened silently and Edward closed his eyes, the constant softness of her voice and the feel of her hand in his hair lulling him back to sleep.

"I still don't trust him." Carlisle muttered once Bella had told him everything, "I'm going to call Emmett and tell him he's spending nights here. I don't want Edward left on his own again."

"I was going to suggest that, I don't trust him either. He's filled in a lot of the missing pieces of what was going on, and it's good to know what James is planning but I don't know, he could be up to anything."

"Exactly, there's no way we're going to take that risk with Edward, no matter what he says on the matter. Now I need to get back to work, are you going to be ok on your own with him or do you want me to call someone?"

"No, I'll be fine."

"Ok, well keep an eye on how he's doing with his ribs and don't let him talk you into any more hugs. It's for his own good." Carlisle said making Bella blush again as she nodded.

"Don't worry, I won't." She mumbled, "I think we've well and truly learnt our lesson with that."

"Good, I'll see you both later on then."

Carlisle left to return to his shift while Bella settled back into her chair. She should have been using the quiet time while Edward was sleeping to study her books for college as Jasper was going out of his way to collect her lecture notes and assignments to pass on to her but instead her attention was drawn to the shoe box still sitting beside Edward.

She was curious, it was hard not to be but she wasn't sure if Edward would want her looking through it. It had caught her attention after he'd fallen asleep before and she'd meant to ask him if she could see the rest of the pictures when he woke up but the way he'd woken up had totally wiped it from her mind and he'd fallen back to sleep while she'd been talking to Carlisle so there hadn't been chance to bring it up. He hadn't seemed to have a problem showing her the couple of photos earlier but she wasn't sure if he'd even looked through the rest of them yet or if he'd got stuck staring at the one of Jessica and Lucy. Deciding it would be best to wait for Edward to wake up again she sighed and looked back to her books.

Studying it was. After all, she really didn't want to get behind in her coursework as if Edward found out she knew he'd blame himself and he was shouldering the blame for far too many things that weren't his fault already.

* * *

><p><em>The crack of breaking bone was shortly followed by agonizing pain shooting through his leg from his knee just before his head collided heavily with the kitchen floor. Wood splintered around him and he was only slightly aware of the possibility that he could now move his arms and legs as pain consumed him. His shoulder was on fire, only marginally overshadowed by the new pain in his knee. A combination of the drugs and the knock to his head was making his vision swim and he couldn't even focus on where James was. <em>

_The ringing of his phone was followed by James' curses. Edward could feel it vibrating in his pocket but his weight was on his arms and he couldn't work out how to move without making things worse. Anymore pain and he was sure he'd pass out completely, it was just too much. The ringing stopped only to start to up again from the landline. He wondered if it was Bella, if she'd found out her car wouldn't start and was worried. If it was her, he hoped she wouldn't come to the flat. He didn't want her to get involved and was sure James would have no qualms about hurting her if she was to launch some kind of rescue attempt. _

_As the ringing stopped again James made his presence known once more with a swift kick to his ribs. Edward knew the grating noise and sharp pain it caused couldn't be good. His phone started ringing again and this time James bent down and fished it out of his pocket._

"_Guess she's tried her car then." He muttered as he glanced at the screen before sitting it on the table, "Shame she's already too late. She's really going to kick herself for that later."_

_The way he was talking made Edward want to fight again and he tried to roll himself over to try and get his hands free but didn't get very far as James was suddenly standing over him, a foot firmly planted on his chest. _

"_Bad idea." He warned before snarling as Edward's mobile started ringing for the third time. "She doesn't know when to give up does she?"_

_The pressure left Edward's chest as he stalked back over to the table, picked the phone up and chucked it onto the floor where Edward could see it. The screen was flashing with Bella's name just before James stamped on it and shattered it. When the house phone started to ring again James left the room and Edward took the chance, knowing it would be the only time James would leave him alone._

_He fought through the fogginess of the drugs and forced himself to roll over, gritting his teeth against the pain that erupted violently from his knee, shoulder and ribs. His vision faded to black for a moment as he rested on his front, the movement having taken more strength than he currently possessed. He could feel jagged, sharp pieces of wood digging into his body as he lay in the remains of the chair he'd been tied to but he stayed as still as he could while he tried to wiggle his hands free of the rope binding them. He felt sick as the movement jiggled his shoulder and sent wave after wave of fresh pain through it but as he felt the rope give a little he managed to get his good arm free. Not sure how that was actually going to help him he looked around for inspiration and his gaze settled on his phone. The screen was cracked, and the casing was broken but he wondered if the mechanics of it would still work. There was nothing else around that could help him so he reached for it and managed to get his hand around it before he felt a crushing pain in his lower leg and cried out from it, his eyes watering. He hadn't even heard James return._

"_Told you it was a bad idea." James stated, roughly rolling him back over before he picked up one of the shattered chair legs and held it like a baseball bat. "We don't have much time. Your girlfriend seems a determined little thing so I imagine she'll get here soon one way or another."_

_A barrage of blows from the make do bat followed, making it feel like there wasn't an inch of him left untouched. The pain grew into one all consuming ache to the point Edward couldn't even determine just what was actually hurting anymore while the drugs slowly fought for his awareness. His sight kept fading in an out, each time the darkness taking over for just a moment longer. Edward had no idea how long the blows lasted but eventually they stopped and he was vaguely aware of James removing the rope that had bound him._

"_I'll say goodbye to Lucy for you." He heard James' voice say although he could no longer focus enough to see him and then a pain worse than anything he'd ever felt before stabbed through his abdomen. It took everything else away and made him want to scream but no sound would come out. He was locked in his useless body, consumed by the pain and bound by the drugs. There was nothing he could do except feel it. _

_The door slammed and realising that meant James had left gave Edward just enough relief to drag him back from the edges of unconsciousness. He needed help, fast and there was no one there to ask. He focused everything he had into getting his phone again but when he picked it up the whole thing fell apart, the battery skidding away out of reach._

_Knowing there was no hope he did the only thing he could. Reaching over to the wound he could feel in his side he pressed his hand lightly too it. Feeling the wood sticking out from him renewed the urge to be sick but he fought through it and tried to ignore the flare of pain. He could feel the warm, slickness of blood on his hand and used it to leave his final message. _

_It was too late for him, he knew he'd taken more damage than his body could ever attempt to deal with but he couldn't leave Lucy in a world where James was free to hurt her. They had to know it was him, needed some kind of proof and if it was the only thing Edward could leave Lucy then he would. _

_He fought his own body and the drugs to scrawl James' name messily in his own blood beside him._

_When it was done Edward could feel the pain starting to fade. His eyes closed and the darkness pulled him under. He tried to fight it, fixed his thoughts on Lucy and Bella. Reminded himself of the dreams he had for them all together, for the future he wanted but it wasn't enough. The dreams faded and there was nothing left to concentrate on other than the pain._

* * *

><p>Edward woke up with the horrible urge to be sick as the pain from his dream stayed with him. It was worse than anything he'd felt since waking and the phantom pain from his abdomen was strong enough that he wanted to lift his sheet to check it was actually ok but there was something that was much more urgent.<p>

"I think I'm going to be sick." He uttered as the pain seemed to intensify and there was no fighting the wave of nausea it brought. He managed to push himself slightly more upright as someone held a disposable bowl in front of him just in time.

The retching didn't help the pain. He could feel the movement pulling on his abdominal wound and his ribs certainly didn't like it. Being upright made his head swim as well after being laid down for so long and the sudden movements did nothing to help.

Someone was lightly rubbing his back but Edward didn't think it was Bella as the touch didn't feel familiar and once the urge to vomit had finally passed Edward caught sight of pale pink scrubs as the bowl vanished from in front of him before gentle hands were helping him to lie back down.

He vaguely recognised the nurse once he could see her face. The strawberry blonde hair tied back in a messy ponytail and freckles across her nose and cheeks seemed familiar but he couldn't put a name to her. He assumed he'd been told her name at some point but as with most things from the last few days any kind of details were missing from his memory.

"Where's Bella?" He asked as he accepted the glass of water she offered. There was no one else in the room with them and he was sure it must have been past the time Lucy got out of school.

"She took your daughter to the toilettes. They should be back soon. She's such a lovely little girl by the way, made me promise to stay in here until they got back." The nurse answered. She was soft spoken with a slight Scottish accent and when she smiled, dimples appeared making her look too young to already be a nurse. The way she was moving around checking his blood pressure and heart rate though showed she was very efficient at what she did and when she stripped back his sheet and gently pressed around his abdominal wound, watching his reactions with stern concentration he got the impression she was older than she looked.

"How are you feeling? Has the nausea passed now? You don't have a temperature and this doesn't look inflamed or any more sensitive than expected so I don't think you've got an infection." She mused aloud pointing to the neat row of stitches which were still in place before moving on to gently press against his ribs.

"I think the dream I was having caused the nausea." He answered, wincing as she hit the worst of his broken ribs.

"What makes you say that?" She asked glancing up at his face before going back to what she was doing.

"I felt sick in the dream, then when I woke up the feeling was still there."

"What was the dream about?" She asked, stopping what she was doing entirely to watch him as he answered. He could tell she wasn't convinced by his explanation although he couldn't blame her as he realised that if it had been some kind of infection making him feel sick that it could have disturbed his sleep. She wasn't trying to be nosey but was just doing her job thoroughly.

"The night this happened." He explained, waving his good hand at his bruised body. "When the table leg went in the pain was too much, it made me feel sick."

"Hmm, I guess that would make sense. I'll leave a note in here anyway and let your doctor know. Everything seems fine now though." She responded, having tucked the sheet back around him and reached for his charts. "How's the pain?"

"Uncomfortable but not too bad." He answered truthfully. The phantom pain from his dream had dulled into the more real ache the vomiting had caused. If he wasn't concentrating on it he was pretty sure he'd be able to ignore it.

"Do you want another dose of pain relief or is it manageable?" She asked, looking up from the notes she was writing and studying his face. He got the impression that if she thought he needed it, she'd give him the medication whether he wanted it or not. She was looking at him too closely and it was very reminiscent of the way Lucy watched him when she was sure he wasn't telling her the truth.

"It's manageable and I'd like to actually be able to have a conversation with my daughter and be able to follow it." He answered truthfully and was relieved when the nurse smiled and closed his notes to return them to their holder.

"Ok then, if it gets any worse or you change your mind you know what to do with that call button." She said, "And if you start to feel sick again let us know immediately."

"I will." He answered just as the door opened and Lucy ran in.

"He's awake!" She cheered turning to Bella who was right behind her and making Edward smile.

"So he is, how are you feeling?" Bella asked, helping Lucy up onto the edge of his bed where she quickly claimed his hand.

"Not too bad." He answered which got a smile from Bella as she sat down but Lucy looked at him for a moment before turning to the nurse who was just about to leave.

"Molly is my daddy getting better?" She asked and while Edward was a little disgruntled she wasn't taking his word for it, he was grateful to finally know the nurses name. As nurses went, he quite liked her. She was friendly and good at her job without being too pushy or nosey.

"Yes he is. He's doing really well." She commented, "But you still need to be careful with him."

"I know, no hugs. Bella told me already." Lucy sighed, "You promise he's really getting better?"

"I promise. Now I need to go check on the rest of my patients so you look after your daddy for me."

With a happy affirmative from Lucy, Molly left them too it and the second the door closed Edward got his hand free so he could tickle Lucy.

"Daddy stop it!" She giggled although she wasn't putting up much of a fight to get away from him.

"How come you believe Molly's answers but not mine?" He asked but his smile let her know he wasn't being serious.

"She's a nurse!" Lucy answered, reclaiming his hand and hugging it to her chest to stop him from trying to tickle her again.

"I guess that's ok then." He relented, "How was school?"

"It was good, I got a gold star on my maths. Are you going to be coming home soon?" Lucy answered as her mood suddenly slumped worrying not only Edward but Bella too as she sat forward in her chair so she could see Lucy better.

"I'm not sure sweetheart. That's up to the doctors. Is something wrong?" He asked wondering why she was suddenly questioning something he was sure had been explained to her many times.

"I miss you."

"I miss you too baby and I wish I was at home with you more than anything but I have to stay here to get better." He tried to explain but it didn't seem to make Lucy feel any better as she continued to frown.

"Can't Carlisle look after you? He's a doctor." She sulked.

"Not until I'm a little better." He answered, completely mystified as to what was wrong as Lucy so very rarely sulked over anything and everyone kept assuring him she was fine but before he could say anything else Bella jumped into the conversation.

"Luce is this about parents evening?" She asked. Renee and Anna had been the ones to pick Lucy up from school and drop her off at the hospital and Renee had warned her that Lucy seemed a little quiet after Anna had told her about parents evening in the car. Knowing how well Lucy did at school they didn't think it was the prospect of talking to her teacher about her work that upset her.

"I want Daddy there." She mumbled quietly and Edward could hear the tears hiding in her voice which hurt more than any of the physical pains he had right then. He couldn't stand disappointing Lucy. It tore him apart.

"When is it?" He asked, turning to Bella for the answer and she could see the desperation in his eyes.

"Next week. They got the letters about it today." Bella answered well aware that that wasn't what he wanted to hear. There was just no way he'd be up to it. He'd be lucky to even be out of the hospital by then and she was pretty sure Carlisle wouldn't want him trying to leave the house.

"Baby look at me." Edward coaxed since Lucy was staring at his hand where she held it. Her eyes slowly lifted and he hated the sadness in them. "I would do anything to be there but I don't think I'm going to be well enough."

"I'm sure Esme would love to go and she'd tell your daddy all about it." Bella suggested hoping to ease Lucy's disappointment and Edward's distress. It was painful to see them both so miserable.

"Would you go?" Lucy asked instead, looking to Bella with the intense kind of focus that made her squirm and Bella's eyes widened as she stared in shock at what Lucy had just asked before she glanced to Edward who was also staring at Lucy in shock.

"Urm..Luce, I'm not sure I'm the right person to ask." She spluttered. She had no idea if Lucy knew what she was asking, what it meant for them all and she honestly didn't know what to say. Lucy scowled grumpily at her and she figured she'd said the wrong thing.

"Why?" Lucy asked stubbornly, "I want you to go if Daddy can't."

Bella looked to Edward to try and gauge what he wanted but his face was blank and when he realised that Bella was looking at him he just shrugged. He was as lost as she was. Lucy was throwing them into a whole new territory. They'd barely even started dating, he hadn't even managed to take her out on a proper date yet and Lucy was already asking things that would mould them into something more. He wondered if she knew what she was doing but as he looked at her she didn't look like she was up to anything. She looked genuinely sad and disappointed.

"Baby, why do you want Bella to go instead of Esme?" He asked.

"We've known her longer. She's more important." Lucy answered and Edward couldn't argue with that since she was right on both counts but he still couldn't work out why she was making such a fuss about it all. It wasn't even like the parents evening should have been a big deal to her. She'd been there with him for the first one and she hadn't seemed that interested in the whole idea as she sat at one of the desks playing with her doll while he'd spoken with her teacher. It had been huge for him though.

When he'd first enrolled Lucy in school her teacher had looked at him with disapproval on discovery that he was in fact Lucy's father but as he'd sat down opposite her at her desk she'd been all smiles as she praised how well Lucy was doing. He'd found himself feeling incredibly proud as the teacher had continued to talk, explaining how she was top of the class for maths and spelling and he could remember well the feeling of relief that had swelled within him as they'd walked home and he'd allowed the thought to cross his mind for the first time that he was actually doing ok as a father.

It should have been him throwing the tantrum as to who was going to go, not Lucy yet he knew there was no point even trying to convince them to let him go, it just wasn't going to be possible. Someone would have to go in his place though as it was important for him to know how Lucy was doing in school especially after everything that had been going on recently but it was a parental duty and while he wouldn't have felt too bad asking Esme to go it felt wrong to ask the same thing of Bella. He didn't want to force that kind of roll on to her.

Bella was looking between him and Lucy but he didn't know what to make of her expression. She was biting her bottom lip again, a sure sign she was nervous or worried but she didn't look like she was about to bolt from the room like he would have expected. Instead she seemed to come to some kind of a decision as she relaxed back into her chair and settled her gaze on Lucy who was also watching her.

"You really want me to go?" She asked quietly to which Lucy nodded.

"If Daddy can't." She clarified, beginning to look a little hopeful as she continued to watch Bella closely.

"Well if it's ok with your dad I guess I can go." Bella responded, looking to him nervously and relaxing when he smiled. She didn't want to disappoint Lucy but she hadn't been sure if agreeing to go would feel like she was pushing her way into the bond Edward shared with her and she knew how important that was to him. She really didn't want him to feel like she was encroaching on that before he was ready to let her especially with how much control he'd already lost with his injuries over the rest of his life.

"If you're sure your ok with it I don't have a problem." He replied although he was still a little scared it was asking too much of her too soon. He felt guilty for letting her take on that responsibility when he wasn't sure how she felt about it but she was offering and he knew it would be stupid to turn her down. Not only would it upset Lucy but he was pretty sure it would give Bella the wrong impression. He did want her in their lives and he trusted her with Lucy, he didn't ever want to give her cause to think otherwise.

"Well then Lucy, looks like I'm going." Bella commented making Lucy smile and reach her arms out for a hug which Bella happily supplied.

After that Lucy turned the conversation around to Rosalie and Emmett as she fulfilled her promise to fill Edward in on all the gossip. His worries about how she was really coping with things that had returned after the way she'd pretty much demanded Bella go to parents evening rather than Esme were eased as they chatted so that by the time she'd had to go home he was satisfied she really was ok and as happy as could be expected considering where he was.

From everything she'd said she seemed to be really enjoying staying with Esme and as he thought about it more and her comment about Bella being more important echoed in his head he started to realise that it was quite possible she had no problem with Esme but just wanted to impress Bella more. It was obvious how much she thought of her and if that was the reasoning it was kind of cute that she wanted to show off to Bella like that as he was fairly confident the teacher wouldn't have anything bad to say. Certainly if he had the opportunity to show off and try to impress Bella he'd want to take it, unfortunately spending his days laying in a hospital bed wasn't that impressive and there was nothing else he was capable of doing right then.

Even with feeling more settled over Lucy's state of mind, Edward was still a little worried about Bella's so when Carlisle appeared and collected Lucy to take her home in time for dinner leaving them alone once more it was the first thing he brought up.

"Are you really sure you're ok going to the parents evening? I know it's kind of a big deal and I don't want you to feel pressured into it just because Lucy asked. I'm sure Esme really would love to go and Lucy would understand."

"No, I'm sure. You don't need to worry. I love Luce and I knew coming into this that being with you was being with both of you. I'm a little surprised at how quickly Lucy is accepting me but it's a good thing. I'm in this for the long haul and I know that means being there for her too. I'm happy to do it."

"She isn't pushing it too fast? I mean we haven't even been on a proper date yet." He worried but Bella's warm smile eased him a little.

"That doesn't matter to me and I'm sure we'll go on plenty of those soon. I just want to be with you guys, it doesn't matter where that is. I know how I feel. I love you, and I love Lucy, that's all that matters."

"We love you too. Thank you for doing this, for everything. You've been amazing with Lucy and with me."

"You really don't need to thank me." She responded wondering just how long it was going to take him to realise that he didn't need to keep thanking her for being there for him, that it was something she wanted and was all too happy to do. They chatted about lighter things after that as Bella could only stay a little longer as Renee was expecting her home for dinner and she wanted to leave Edward cheerful for the night rather than an over thinking things that weren't an issue to begin with.

It was only after Bella had left for the night that Edward realised Lucy had successfully distracted him enough that he hadn't even thought to mention the dream he'd had or ask her to get Detective Jenks to visit him again. He knew there was still more he needed to remember but he thought that the little he did now know would help.

He was already tired again by then though so the detective would have to wait. The thought of remembering more in his dreams did leave him a little reluctant to fall back to sleep but he knew how important it was that he did remember everything so he didn't try to fight his exhaustion and by the time Emmett wandered in, only five minutes after Bella left, he was already asleep.

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><p><em>AN - Sorry this is a little late. We've been making the most of the rare sunshine we've had here in Edinburgh the last week so I haven't had as much time in the house for writing and then I went to see Charlie Simpson (a lot of his songs have been used as chapter titles and inspiration for this story) on Friday night. I got to meet him and I've been following the guy for the last ten years through two different bands and his solo career and finally getting to meet him made me that hyper that I just wasn't able to settle into getting this chapter sorted out over the weekend. <em>

_The rain is now back and work wiped out the hyperness so here the chapter finally is, I hope it wasn't too bad._

_Thank you again for the reviews and favourites, they're still very much appreciated :)_


	43. Chapter 41 Pushing

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 41 – Pushing<strong>

Emmett sat in Bella's usual seat watching Edward sleep. Carlisle had called him that afternoon and explained briefly how Riley had visited and what he'd had to say and Emmett had been on board straight away for spending the night at the hospital. He'd taken a nap for most of the afternoon just so he'd be able to stay awake during the night, determined that for once he wouldn't miss it if Edward needed him.

Carlisle had also warned him that Edward was having nightmares again but so far his sleep seemed peaceful. There'd certainly been no movement, muttering or tears anyway. Still, Emmett was glad to be there. Bella's constant presence had made it awkward to get the chance to talk to Edward alone and Emmett felt like he had a lot to say. Things were so screwed up and he knew he had a lot to apologise for. They hadn't even been on good terms before the attack and that just highlighted how important it was that they sort things out now. He didn't want to be fighting with Edward, if anything ever happened to him again and the last words they'd said to each other had been in anger he didn't know how he'd be able to cope with it.

He wanted to know exactly what Riley had said to Edward as well. Carlisle hadn't had a lot of time when he'd called him and had only managed to give him the overview. He knew that Riley had visited and that he'd told Edward of James' plans but he didn't know why Riley can changed sides or anything else that had been said. The fact everyone suddenly seemed to just be trusting him made Emmett want to know the details so he could understand it.

He heard the shuffling of Edward's blanket as he moved and was on the edge of his seat instantly although it seemed it was just a restless movement as he woke as it was followed by a short hiss of pain before Edward's eyes blinked open.

"Hey, you ok?" Emmett asked quietly as Edward focused on him and while he moved his good arm to rub at his ribs a little he didn't complain.

"What time's it?" He asked instead of answering and Emmett frowned but looked to his watch anyway.

"A little after midnight." He answered and Edward sighed, wondering if he'd ever be able to get back to a normal sleep pattern once he left the hospital.

"Carlisle and Bella made you stay here?" He asked wishing that they hadn't bothered. He was in no mood for talking to his brother even if he had half been expecting him to turn up when Bella left without a fight. He'd be certain she wouldn't have felt comfortable leaving him on his own again after Riley's visit and considering Carlisle had been working all day, Esme would be looking after Lucy and Alice had school to go to the following morning that only left Emmett free for spending the night in an uncomfortable hospital chair. He wanted to be angry that he was there but considering he knew it was because they were concerned for him he knew he'd just have to put up with it. The last thing he wanted was Bella wearing herself out by staying with him just because he'd thrown a fit about Emmett being there. He just hoped Emmett wouldn't do anything to trigger the anger that so easily erupted between the pair of them.

"They asked but I wanted to anyway. We haven't really had a chance to talk since you woke up." Emmett answered but his hopes for having a proper conversation with his brother were shattered as Edward scowled.

"I don't want to talk." He muttered before his attention was diverted as he lifted up his blanket and stared down at his leg, the scowl intensifying.

"Something wrong?"

"Itches." He sighed, letting the blanket drop back into place as he fidgeted a little. He was starting to feel well enough that he was beginning to get uncomfortable in the bed, he just wanted to be able to move but everything still ached enough for him to know it wasn't a good idea.

"Don't think there's anything that can be done about that, sorry." Emmett responded which only fuelled Edward's grumpiness.

"I hate this."

"Guess you're really starting to feel a bit better then." Emmett commented thinking that the grumpiness was at least better than the vacant haziness he'd been stuck in before although Edward didn't seem so sure as he ignored Emmett's comment and ploughed into more of his annoyances.

"Do you know I'm going to miss Lucy's parents evening next week? She was so upset over it and there was nothing I could do." He complained.

"I'm sure she wasn't upset with you." Emmett offered but it did little to improve Edward's mood.

"That doesn't matter. She was still upset because of me. If it hadn't been for Bella agreeing to go instead she would have been in tears." He snapped and while Emmett thought he probably ought to have been reassuring him that Lucy would be fine he got stuck on the little detail of Bella going to parents evening instead.

"Bella's going? That's kind of...important...?"

"Lucy asked her to." Edward responded and Emmett had no idea if the scowl that was still on his face was directed at him asking questions or at Bella being the one Lucy asked to stand in for him.

"And you're ok with that?"

"So long as Bella is, and she said she was." Edward answered which threw Emmett a little. It seemed like a big step for such a new relationship.

"Wow." He blurted as nothing else came to mind as he tried to get his head around it.

"What?" Edward snapped and this time Emmett was in no doubt what so ever that Edward's abruptness was directed at him. He really wished he knew how to talk to him without just making him angry all the time.

"It's just, it's kind of fast. Especially for you. I mean, you've never had a girlfriend before and after everything that happened with Lucy's mum I just thought you'd be a little more cautious or something. Her going to Lucy's parents evening is kind of like sending out the message that you guys are serious, that Lucy can look to her as a parent." He tried to explain his thinking carefully knowing he was walking on a very fine edge with Edward's anger.

"I trust Bella, Lucy obviously trusts her too. I want her to be part of our lives, it would come up at some point and Bella says she's ok with it." Edward responded calmly enough although Emmett could see he was just waiting for him to say something against it. He was wary, far too ready to go on the defensive and Emmett didn't want that to happen. The moment it did he knew all hopes of talking about anything else would be destroyed and he really wasn't trying to question Edward's decisions. He just wanted to understand them and know he was making them for the right reasons.

"That's good then. I'm happy for you, just don't let yourself be pushed into anything you aren't ready for. You've got family around you, you don't need to solely rely on Bella. We're here for you and Lucy too." He responded, feeling slightly proud that he'd managed to say something supportive yet remind Edward there were other people there for him too. For all he liked Bella he still didn't think it would be a good idea for Edward to get too dependent on just her.

Edward let them lapse into an awkward silence after that as he didn't want to let Emmett know what he really felt on the matter. If he was being honest though he would have pointed out that he trusted Bella more than anyone else he had around him. He was still half convinced that at some point, probably in the near future, Emmett and Alice would run back to their parents. He knew Emmett had quit his job and that they'd both moved into the Cullen household but he didn't think it would last. Their father would find a way to get them back or they'd run out of money and go running back themselves. Esme and Carlisle he trusted a little more but it was still hard to completely let his guard down as he'd long ago learnt that he couldn't rely on family for anything.

Bella was different. Since he'd known her she'd never let him down, she'd been there whenever he'd needed her, even the times he hadn't thought he needed anyone. She'd risked her life to save him and she'd stayed with him twenty four seven when he was in the coma. She'd even looked after Lucy for a week when they'd barely even known each other and Lucy had always liked her, had trusted her instantly and that was just as bigger tell for him. She'd pushed them together and as Garrett had pointed out early on, she was just as protective of him as he was of her. She wouldn't just trust anyone with him so her judgement on the matter meant a lot to him.

It didn't matter what Emmett said to him, he knew he'd always trust Bella over his own brother. She was there because she wanted to be, she'd chosen him when she could have kept her distance which meant more to him than the rest of them just being there because the fact they were related dictated that they should be.

Bella had quickly become the most important person in his life after Lucy and he didn't think she'd ever lose that position. He might not have had a girlfriend before and he might have been at a total loss as to what to do to be a good partner but he knew himself well enough to know that what he felt for Bella wasn't just a passing phase. She was it for him and as hard as it was to get his head around sometimes he was fairly sure she felt the same way so there wasn't any point in delaying progression that would happen in the long run anyway. If Lucy was ready to accept Bella and look to her as a parental influence and Bella was happy to accept that responsibility then he wasn't going to stand in the way of it. It would only get confusing for Lucy and lead to pointless misunderstandings and hurt feelings if he did.

"Can we talk about Riley?" Emmett unwisely broke into his thoughts and Edward could instantly feel the anger bubbling under the surface again.

"No." He answered bluntly hoping that Emmett would hear from his tone that it wasn't up for discussion. Unfortunately, if he did, he chose to ignore it.

"Please? Carlisle didn't have time to tell me the full story and to be honest it was a little confusing."

"No, I'm not talking about it with you and if you want to remain on speaking terms with me don't push me on this." Edward warned making Emmett's face fall but Edward couldn't care if he'd hurt his feelings, it would only be worse if they talked about it.

"I don't understand; you talked to Bella and Carlisle about it. Why not me?"

"I talked to Bella about it, she told Carlisle. I can't talk about it with you." Edward answered bluntly. Their falling out before the attack had stemmed from Emmett refusing to listen to him and he was doing the same thing again which didn't do much to help his case.

"Why?" He pushed again making Edward bristle and snap, revealing a little more than he'd intended.

"Because I'm trying really hard not to hate you right now and if I talk about this with you I can assure you it won't help with that."

"What? Why? What have I done?" Emmett asked, his eyes wide in disbelief as he tried to think of anything he could have done to cause Edward to be so harsh in his refusal to talk. He knew they weren't on the best of terms from him endangering Lucy but hate was a strong word to be throwing around.

"Just drop it." Edward warned but Emmett was hurt and confused by Edward's previous statement and he couldn't just leave it alone.

"No, I want to know what I've done that's so wrong." He pushed again and Edward was just too angry and frustrated to hold it in any longer.

"Fine. While James had me tied to one of my own kitchen chairs he decided to tell me exactly why he was doing what he was and the very first thing that started it all was you. He was angry at you for dating Victoria and then furious at you for hurting her. He wanted to get back at _you_.

When Jessica came home crying over a rumour someone had spread about me sleeping with one of her friends he decided to get back at us both and the best way he could think of was through me. He drugged me to get his sister what she wanted but also to get the joy of knowing he'd hurt your little brother while you were in the same house, totally clueless.

I'm trying really hard not to think about this, I don't want to hate you but you're making that really hard when all I can think about is the fact that if you hadn't been sleeping your way through the girls at our school then maybe he wouldn't have gone to such an extreme and those rumours that upset Jessica wouldn't have existed as the only reason people started them was because they thought I was exactly like you just because we were related."

When he finished speaking Edward's eyes were closed and he kept them that way. If he could have, he'd have turned so his back was to his brother but he couldn't move, not onto his healing shoulder and definitely not with the stitches in his abdomen.

He could hear Emmett's breathing falter slightly but he still refused to look at him. He couldn't, not without feeling the hate he was trying to keep at bay over power him. Deep down he knew the only one to blame in the entire situation was James. That it was his screwed up reasoning that was at fault but the part of him that had hated the way his family had turned their backs on him was all too eager to lay the blame at Emmett's feet. After all, what he'd said was true. Whatever way he looked at it the original cause for James to decide drugging him was the best idea was Emmett's fault. It was his fault Edward had been labelled with the popular crowd despite his quieter, more solidarity disposition. It was Emmett's reputation which had been dumped on him without him ever giving any credence to the rumours that circulated and it was Emmett's treatment of Victoria that had fuelled James' anger, giving him a reason to look for retribution before Edward's name was even brought to his attention. Given the size and popularity of Emmett it even made sense that James would go after the weaker brother anyway. It would have been hard to get to Emmett and even harder to get away with it unscathed. Edward would always have been the perfect target, he'd never been a fighter and had often drifted off on his own and as James had pointed out, it would get to Emmett that he hadn't been able to protect his younger sibling. The guilt was a crueller punishment that would have stuck with him longer than a black eye or a broken nose.

"I'm sorry." Emmett finally croaked and from just his voice Edward could tell he truly was and that what he'd just blurted out had probably only aided James in getting his revenge in hurting Emmett but it didn't change anything. He wanted to be able to focus on the fact that without any of it having happened, he wouldn't have had Lucy but right then it wasn't enough. He'd always be thankful for her, she'd been the best thing to ever happen to him despite the circumstances she'd arrived in but while she made all the pain worthwhile, she didn't erase it or the lingering anger.

Edward stayed silent, pretending to fall back to sleep and after a while he heard the shuffling of Emmett getting to his feet and then the soft clicks of the door opening and closing.

He didn't hear Emmett stop just outside his room and lean against the wall. He didn't hear him sink to the floor. He didn't see him with his head in his hands as his shoulders began to shake and he certainly didn't see the tears stream down his face as he absorbed the fact that he'd inadvertently been the root cause of the attempt on his brother's life.

Instead Edward was hit by the thought that half of what he'd just told Emmett about James' motivations had never been mentioned by Riley. He shouldn't have known any of it yet it had just come to him like it had been there all along. As he kept his eyes closed and thought about it he could even picture James casually slumped in one of his kitchen chairs, his feet propped up on another as he spoke before he got up and circled him.

He really needed to speak to Detective Jenks. 

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><p>Bella couldn't sleep. She'd tried. She'd gone to bed at ten, slightly earlier than she usually would as after a week of very little sleep she was still trying to catch up but it had taken her over an hour of restless tossing and turning before she'd managed to drift off and then at two in the morning she was once again awake.<p>

The nightmare she'd forgotten to talk to Carlisle about had returned. Whether it was the reminder Edward had provided, waking up the way he had earlier in the day or whether Lucy had been the magic cure the night before she didn't know but the outcome was the same. She'd woken in a cold sweat, terror filling her and the image of Edward's cold, deathly pale and still body at the forefront of her mind.

It was so hard to shake the image, especially when he wasn't right in front of her with the steady sound of his heart monitor beeping in the background. Rationally she knew it was just a dream, that he'd never looked quite that pale, never felt quite that cold to the touch but fear was a formidable thing and she just couldn't get the picture out of her head.

There was no way she was going to be able to get back to sleep, not without having seen Edward again first so with a frustrated sigh she pushed her covers away and climbed out of bed. She tried to be quiet as she stumbled her way down the stairs and into the kitchen where she turned the light on and headed for the cupboards to make herself a mug of hot chocolate. She felt chilled to the bone and in desperate need of something to warm her yet it was only as she waited for the milk to heat in the microwave that she realised in her sleepy haze she hadn't even thought to put her dressing gown on and was just standing there in the shorts and worn t-shirt she usually wore to bed. Shaking her head at her own idiocy she pushed away from the units she was leaning against thinking she really ought to go back upstairs and get something warmer to wear but instead her eyes caught on one of Renee's long woolly cardigans draped over the back of a chair. She pulled it on before she finished making her drink then sat down at the table, huddling up in the borrowed cardigan. It had the familiar, comforting scent she'd always known as her mother and it offered a little of the warmth she'd been looking for but it wasn't her mum she wanted right then. It was Edward.

Renee found her there a while later. Her hands were still wrapped around her mug although when Renee peered into it she found it to be empty. Bella didn't even seem to register her presence in the room until she'd reached the sink and was filling a glass with water.

"What are you doing up?" Bella asked, looking a little startled and in answer to her question Renee just held the now full glass of water up.

"Shouldn't I be the one asking you that?" She responded and she hated the way Bella's shoulders slumped with the question as she stared back into her empty mug.

"Couldn't sleep." She mumbled and Renee studied her for a moment before sitting her glass down onto the counter and moving over to her side.

"That nightmare still bothering you?" She asked, stroking Bella's hair back from her face so she could see her properly and frowning at just how worn she looked. "I thought you were going to talk to Carlisle about it last night."

"I was but Lucy was too distracting and I forgot. I slept fine there anyway." Bella sighed as she leant against Renee's side so she wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"Sweetie, something like that isn't just going to go away. You went through a pretty traumatic day, maybe you should talk to someone about it."

"I know, I just thought maybe all I needed was to relax but I guess that was all just Lucy. I really will speak to Carlisle about it later. I'm so tired."

"Why don't you try going back to bed for a while? It is three am." Renee suggested but Bella shuddered.

"I can't, every time I close my eyes I see him laying in that bed only dead. I need to see him." She responded making Renee squeeze her a little tighter against her.

"You know he's ok. Emmett's with him right?" She asked and Bella nodded against her to confirm it so she continued, "Well he would have called if anything was wrong. You don't need to be worrying over him right now and he'd want you to be getting some rest."

"I know and I know it's not rational but I just can't, not until I've seen him for myself." Bella returned, pulling away to rest her head on her arms which she folded on top of the table.

"You really love him don't you?" Renee asked, pulling a chair out to get comfortable. She had a feeling they were going to be there a while. They really hadn't talked a lot in the last couple of weeks with Bella spending all of her time at the hospital and it looked like she could do with a chat if she was insisting on staying up.

"I really do. I can't stand the idea of him not being there anymore. He's starting to remember things, he knew he was dying, we were that close to losing him."

"But we didn't and that's what you've got to focus on, not the what ifs. He's still here and he is going to get better. Concentrate on where you're going from here; make plans for when he's up and about or something. It would give you both something to look forward to." Renee suggested reaching out to brush Bella's hair away from her face again.

"I know that's what I should be doing, I just wish my subconscious did so I could get some sleep." Bella responded sadly, "I'm sure everything would seem much better if I wasn't so tired."

"Nothing else is bothering you?" Renee asked getting the sense there was something else there from Bella's use of the word everything in her last statement.

Bella shrugged in response before she sat back in her chair and sighed again.

"I don't know. I mean it's not really bothering me but I'm not totally sure about it. You know how Anna and Lucy's parents evening is next week?" She asked and when Renee nodded she continued, "Well you were right, it was upsetting Lucy. She wanted Edward to go but he's not going to be up and around by then. It was heartbreaking seeing the looks on both their faces. I'm pretty sure it'll be the first time Edward's ever not been able to be there for Lucy and it was tearing them both apart. Lucy asked me to go instead of Esme and I agreed."

"And now you're regretting it?" Renee guessed.

"No, but I'm not sure it was the right thing to do. I mean is it moving too fast?" Bella asked and the earlier sadness had been replaced by uncertainty as she looked to her mum for advice. She knew Edward had said he was fine with it but she couldn't help but wonder if he really was and she was still worried it could cause problems for them.

"Does it feel too fast to you?"

Bella shrugged again thinking back to how when Lucy had asked her it had felt almost natural to just say yes after she'd gotten over the initial shock of it.

"Not really, she wanted me to go and I didn't want to disappoint her. I want to be there for her and if I want things to work out with Edward then she has to be able to trust and rely on me."

"What did Edward have to say about it?" Renee asked and she watched as Bella frowned a little before answering.

"Not a lot really. Just that it was ok with him if I didn't have a problem with it. He seemed worried I'd be scared off from it."

"Then no, I don't think it's too fast. Things are always more complicated when there's a child involved but if there's anyone who can handle it, it's you. You've always been mature for your age and you've been helping me raise Anna since she was born. So long as you're sure this is what you want then trust how you feel and just go with it. There are no rules for the right way to go about a relationship; you just have to do what feels right for all of you."

"I'm sure about them. I love Lucy just as much as Edward. I just don't want to push myself into their lives before he's ready." Bella responded still in need of a little more reassurance.

"He'll tell you if he's not comfortable with something, especially when it involves Lucy. I know I don't really know him that well but if there's one thing I do know about that boy it's that he'd do anything for Lucy. He'd definitely speak up if he thought something wasn't in her best interests." Renee replied and Bella couldn't help but smile a little at that as it was definitely true and it did ease her concerns.

"You're right. Thank you, I think I just needed to hear someone else say it. It all gets so confusing."

"Especially when you're not sleeping." Renee commented, "You know I'm here whenever you need to talk. What you're doing isn't going to be easy, there's going to be lots of stumbling and muddling your way through but for what it's worth I think the three of you are good together."

"Thank you." Bella replied and finally seeing a steady smile on her face Renee knew it was time to get back to bed. There was school in the morning and it would have to be an earlier than usual start as she was fairly certain Bella would be in need of a lift to the hospital before she could get to work as her own car hadn't been fixed yet.

"Well, now that's all sorted, I think it's time we both got back to bed. At least try to get some more sleep."

Bella reluctantly agreed and rinsed her mug out before she followed Renee back up the stairs. She did feel a little better after their talk. Renee was right; she did have to try and focus more on the future and maybe if she could do that the nightmares wouldn't be so bad. They had a lot to look forward to and she was sure Edward wouldn't mind having something to talk about other than how he was feeling for a change. She could tell he was starting to get frustrated being in hospital and the better he felt the worse that would get. A distraction was just what they both needed and she knew Lucy would be all too keen to help come up with some fun things they could do once Edward was up and about again. They needed something good to bond over for a change, not just all the upset and drama that seemed to make up their lives.

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><p>Alice stomped into the kitchen where Esme and Carlisle were sitting around the breakfast bench drinking coffee and sharing a large plate of toast. They both looked up at her as she dropped her mobile onto the bench and glared at it.<p>

"Something wrong?" Esme asked taking in the usually perfectly put together girl who was currently still dressed in pyjamas, her hair mused from sleep and a scowl on her face.

"She keeps calling me. Asking me to go home." Alice spat as she took a seat and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Ah, your mother I take it?" Carlisle asked. They hadn't seen her since that first day in the hospital and though they'd talked a little about what Bella had shared of her observations that night they hadn't tried to contact her. Esme had simply stated that Elizabeth had made her bed and she wasn't going to be the one to make the first move to regaining any type of relationship. She'd tried and been rebuffed far too many times already.

"Yes. I keep telling her I'm not going anywhere but she won't listen. Just keeps going on about missing us and how Dad wants us home. 'Us' of course doesn't include Edward so I don't know why she thinks we'll listen. There's no way I could stand being in the same house as him anymore. I don't get how even she can stand it." Alice answered.

"No, I don't understand it either. You know you're both welcome to stay here as long as you want to. We love having you here don't we?" Esme answered, turning to Carlisle who agreed although he was a little concerned over the worry that was clear in Esme's eyes. He'd wondered before if she'd been a little hasty in not trying to get in contact with Elizabeth again after hearing how she'd stayed with Bella and what she'd said to her. He knew she had hurt Esme many times but Esme had always been the compassionate one and the coldness she'd develop in response to her sister just didn't sit right with him. It had to be bothering her.

"Thank you, we really do appreciate you letting us stay. I just wish Mum would leave us alone."

"How many times has she called you?" Esme asked.

"At least once a day since we came here. At first I thought she was calling for news on Edward but now she just keeps going on and on about how she misses us and that Dad wants us to come home."

"How does she sound?" Carlisle asked, sitting his coffee down and watching as Alice shrugged while reaching for her phone again.

"Same as ever, detached. Though the last couple of calls she seemed a little upset."

"Well it's about time she started feeling something." Esme commented harshly although Carlisle wasn't fooled as he could see the worry flicker in her eyes again.

"True, I just hope she quits trying to call us by the time Edward's here." Alice responded making any trace of concern from Esme vanish.

"If she doesn't, just ignore the calls while around him. He does not need to be upset right now, he's got enough to deal with." She stated and Alice nodded before jumping up from her seat.

"I guess I better go and get dressed.

"Yes, that's usually a good idea before going to school. It's probably time I was waking Lucy up as well actually." Esme responded, looking to the clock and seeing it was just past seven.

"I'll do that, you finish your breakfast." Carlisle commented having already drained his coffee and had his fill of toast. He leaned over to quickly kiss Esme's temple before he followed Alice out of the kitchen and they separated as he headed to Lucy's room and Alice climbed the stairs to her own. He had to be in work soon but there was plenty of time left to help Lucy get ready for school.

She always brightened any day with her infectious smile and warm hugs and he had a feeling he was going to need one to get him through the rest of the day. Emmett and Edward were awkward together at best and he wasn't quite sure what he'd find when he got to the hospital. If Edward had managed to sleep through the night then they probably wouldn't have had much chance to talk but considering how often he was waking up it seemed unlikely that would be the case so he just had to hope they'd managed to avoid any kind of conflict.

So far Edward had seemed pretty relaxed about the fact they'd moved him and Lucy in and it was important nothing happened to change that. He'd be released from the hospital soon and would need them and the care they could provide him but it just wouldn't work if he started trying to fight them on it so the last thing any of them needed was for Edward to get angry and close himself off from everyone again.

As he opened Lucy's bedroom door and stepped inside to find her curled up in the bed with her arms wrapped tightly around her favourite teddy bear he realised that even if the worst did happen at least they had Lucy on their side. She'd talk Edward round eventually; after all, no one could refuse her, especially Edward. All they had to do was make sure she knew that it was best for him if they stayed with them while he recovered and he was fairly confident the fact he was a doctor would convince her easily enough.

By the time he was leaving the house, having received several hugs from Lucy and a goodbye kiss from his wife, Carlisle felt bolstered enough to meet whatever was waiting for him at the hospital, whether it be a hard day in the emergency rooms or feuding brothers on the floor above. 

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><p><em>AN - Happy Easter!<em>

_I really didn't think I'd have anything to post for you this weekend after some serious writers block at the start of the week so an extra special thank you this week to everyone who has taken the time to leave a review as I really enjoy reading them and they gave me the inspiration to persevere and get something written - Thank you_!


	44. Chapter 42 Good Advice, Bad Idea

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 42 – Good Advice, Bad Idea<strong>

Carlisle arrived at the hospital twenty minutes before his shift was due to start, giving him enough time to head up to Edward's room and visit for a while. Even so, he was still careful to sneak through the corridors of his own department, avoiding catching the eye of any of his staff as he knew that whether he was technically on shift or not, they'd be all too eager to pull him into work.

With a breath of relief he entered Edward's ward, having successfully made it through the hospital unnoticed but his relief was short lived. Turning onto the corridor that housed Edward's room he was met by the sight of Emmett sitting on the floor, his knees folded to his chest and his head leant back against the wall. His eyes were red and puffy, his face unusually pale and the glossy tear tracks stood out clearly on his skin under the corridor's fluorescent lights.

"What's happened?" He asked urgently as his steps hurried to meet his nephew, fearing for the worst. His thoughts were already trying to catalogue Edward's injuries and what he'd seen in his charts on his last visit it an attempt to work out what could have gone so badly wrong until Emmett moved his gaze to him and sadly shook his head.

"Nothing, Edward's fine." He muttered, pulling himself back to his feet and rubbing a hand across his eyes before he sighed, "I'll be going home, he doesn't want me here."

"Emmett wait...what's going on?" Carlisle asked, reaching out to grab his arm as he tried to turn away. His fear for Edward's health may have been calmed by Emmett's dismissal but there was still something obviously very wrong and considering Emmett was sitting outside of Edward's room he suspected it was something between the brothers. For all he'd been expecting some kind of argument to have occurred, he really hadn't expected it to be anything bad enough to find Emmett looking so totally defeated.

"It's my fault. Everything that's happened to him...it was all my fault. I don't blame him for hating me. I hate me." He answered tonelessly, his voice trailing off towards the end making Carlisle struggle to catch his last few words.

"That's not true." He started automatically but Emmett shook his head and pulled his arm out of his grasp as he turned away again.

"Don't. Just...don't." He plead, his voice cracking slightly and Carlisle was so taken aback by it that he ended up just watching as Emmett walked away, his shoulders slumped and his head bowed.

The door at the end of the corridor banging shut behind Emmett startled Carlisle enough to make him realise that Emmett really had just walked out and it left him torn. He didn't want to let Emmett walk away, not like that, but if Emmett looked that bad then he had to check on Edward. If he was anywhere near as upset as Emmett then his breathing could easily get out of control and without the oxygen hooked up and the lower dosage of pain medication he was on that wouldn't be good so he really had no choice other than to check on him.

Finding him awake and calm was not what he'd anticipated at all.

"I've just seen Emmett; he looked dreadful...what happened?" He asked as soon as Edward noticed him, beginning to wonder if he really should have followed Emmett instead as Edward didn't even look upset.

"He wanted to talk, I told him no but he wouldn't listen. In the end he didn't like what I had to say." He answered, feeling slightly pleased that Emmett was suffering before a wave of reluctant guilt hit him when Carlisle continued to look at him with confusion and worry.

"And what exactly was that?" Carlisle questioned when Edward didn't elaborate any further on his own only to be met with a stony glare before Edward sighed and repeated what he'd already told Emmett, watching warily as Carlisle seemed to get more and more alarmed.

"Edward I can see why you'd be angry with him but you can't honestly believe it was his fault surely?"

Edward shrugged as well as he could making himself wince in the process as his shoulder moved but it got the point across if the slight frown on Carlisle's face was anything to go by.

"Rationally? No. I know it was James which was why I didn't want to talk to Emmett about it in the first place." He grudgingly gave in a little which only confused Carlisle even more.

"Then why are you letting Emmett believe you hate him? He's already cut up enough over not being able to stop James from getting to you without believing he caused it all as well."

"If he'd left it alone I wouldn't have said anything. I don't want to blame him and I certainly don't want to hate him but you've got no idea how hard that is even without Emmett always pushing or saying stupid things. I spent years without any family or friends around and the only way to stop that hurting so much was to convince myself I didn't need or want them in my life. Part of me still wants to believe that so I can't get hurt again and knowing why James thought he had to do what he did its hard not to let the anger get to me. When I look at Emmett all I can think about is the pain and he insists on bringing it all up."

"Ok, I guess I can understand that." Carlisle sighed as it did make sense but it didn't help solve the issue. "Emmett looked pretty distraught out there though."

"I want to say I'm sorry but I'm not. I warned him to leave it all alone. Maybe if he gives me some space for a while I'll be able to look at it differently. I didn't want it to end up like this." Edward responded truthfully. He really hadn't wanted things to get so out of control but Emmett seemed to have a knack for pushing all his buttons and he didn't think it was likely to get better any time soon if Emmett kept trying to get them to talk.

"I suppose that's fair enough. I'll talk to him later. How are you feeling anyway?" Carlisle asked deciding that the best thing he could do right then was change the subject. If Edward hadn't wanted to dwell on it in the first place he doubted if he pressed the issue as well that it would get any better. He didn't want the brothers to be so at odds with each other but there wasn't really anything that could be done about it and he didn't want to make Edward angry at the rest of them as well.

"Better I guess. Fed up of being in this bed and my leg is unbelievably itchy."

"The cast?" He questioned and when Edward nodded he couldn't help but smile a little, "That's to be expected I'm afraid. As for being fed up of being in bed I think there's a good chance one of the physiotherapy guys will be up here later to talk to you about your shoulder and knee and there might be the possibility of getting you out of here soon depending on what they say."

"Really?" Edward asked, his mood brightening as the fight with Emmett seemed to be instantly forgotten and Carlisle wondered if Emmett's conversation with him might have gone just a little better if he'd waited until Edward had had some good news rather than just a barrage of unpleasant returning memories.

"I think so. You're off most of the machines now and you don't seem to be having much trouble with your breathing. Everything else we should be able to manage at home but you will be taking it very easy for a while and there won't be much moving around as you're going to be restricted to a wheel chair and even that might be a little sore on your abdomen."

"At least I'll be with Lucy though." Edward commented happily and Carlisle was pleased that he didn't seem to be voicing any complaints on where he would be going home to. He just hoped they wouldn't meet any problems once he was home with Emmett staying there as well. If they weren't talking it was going to make life a little awkward for everyone but they'd find a way to deal with it.

"She'll be very happy to have you there as well." He commented, choosing to stick to voicing the positive aspects before he glanced at his watch and realised he probably ought to be heading back down to his office. "Is there anything you need before I go? My shift starts soon."

"Do you have a number for Detective Jenks? I think I need to speak to him again, I forgot to ask Bella last night and the conversation with Emmett didn't get that far." He responded, some of the excitement draining from his eyes as he started to worry at the edge of his covers. He really didn't want to talk to anyone about what he'd remembered but he knew he had to tell the detective. It was the only way to make sure they were all safe.

"I have his card in my office, I can try and get hold of him this morning. Have more memories come back?" Carlisle answered thinking that if he had been bombarded with more of them his reaction to Emmett was probably even more understandable. None of what he had to remember would be pleasant which would put anyone off talking about it and if he hadn't had chance to let it all sink in properly it would have been hard for him not to lash out at the first person who questioned him on it. Unfortunately that had obviously been Emmett only making the entire thing more volatile given his involvement in the situation.

"Yeah, most of its come back I think. Hopefully it will be enough to back up Riley's story anyway." Edward answered uncomfortably so Carlisle chose not to question him on the actual content of the memories for the time being. So long as the police knew what they needed to, all the rest of them really needed to know was how Edward was healing. The cause of his injuries he could fill them in on later when and if he wanted to.

"That's good then. Are you managing to get enough sleep?"

"Yeah, last night wasn't too bad. I did wake up in the night but I think that was caused more by all the naps during the day messing up my sleep pattern than by any nightmares."

"Well you're certainly looking a lot more rested anyway. I guess I better go make that call for you but Bella will no doubt be here soon so you shouldn't be on your own for too long. I'll come back and see you later on and I think Esme's planning to stay for a while when she brings Lucy in after school."

"You know I'm fine by myself." Edward commented with a good natured grumble but Carlisle shook his head in amusement.

"Lucy and Bella are a lot scarier than you, and they don't want you left you on your own. You know, they make quite a formidable pair; you're never going to get your own way ever again. " He pointed out and was rewarded with a smile from Edward as he agreed before they said goodbye and Carlisle left, reaching his office with plenty of time to not only leave a message for Detective Jenks but to call Esme and ask her to check on Emmett as well. Edward may have been in surprisingly good spirits but he didn't think Emmett would be any time soon and he had the feeling he probably didn't ought to be dealing with it on his own.

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><p>Bella was feeling a lot more upbeat than she had in a while when Renee dropped her off at the hospital. The chat they'd had in the night had really done some good and she'd actually managed to get a couple more hours of sleep before they'd all needed to get up for the school run. It still wasn't quite enough though as she was still tired but her mood only improved further when she stepped into Edward's room to see him sat up in the bed with a man dressed in maroon scrubs that she didn't recognise but who obviously worked there gently manipulating his left arm which was out of its sling for the first time.<p>

"Hey." She greeted them as she headed for her usual seat and Edward smiled at her before he grimaced and his attention snapped back to the man who was helping him to raise his arm above his head.

"That hurt." He complained, lowering his arm back down and rubbing at his shoulder with his right hand.

"Sorry but it is necessary." The man responded so Edward turned back to Bella who was curiously watching them and smiled again. Despite his complaining, Edward seemed to be in a fairly good mood.

"This is Dan, he's a physiotherapist. I'm pretty sure that's just a code word for evil pain inflictor though." He introduced, levelling Dan with a glare as he added the last comment and Dan's mouth twitched up into a faint smile as he told Edward to bend his arm and reach across to his right shoulder.

"You'll thank me in the long run." He commented just before Edward hissed in pain again and let his arm fall back to his side.

"Well it's nice to meet you. I'm Bella." She said, watching with amusement as Edward grumbled and Dan ignored him, focused solely on the movement in his shoulder as he told him to lift his arm up again.

"My girlfriend." Edward elaborated making Bella smile at the hint of pride in his voice as he said it and satisfied with what Edward was doing with his arm for the moment Dan finally glanced to Bella with a pleasant smile.

"I'm glad you're here then Bella, you should pay attention to what we're doing. We're going to be running through some of the exercises he'll need to do regularly to rebuild the strength in this shoulder and considering all the complaining he's doing I've got a feeling he might try to skip some of them when I'm not around but it's important that he doesn't. The second dislocation has weakened the joint considerably and it'll probably always be a little weaker and easier to dislocate again but the exercises should help return full movement to the joint and stop it from stiffening up."

"I'll make sure he does them then." She commented, trying hard not to laugh at the playful scowl on Edward's face at her words before his attention was snapped back to Dan again as he encouraged him to lift his arm once more.

"Ow!" He complained again, "Are you sure this is going to help?"

"Yup, if you don't try to get it moving it will stiffen up and that's only going to hurt more in the long run." Dan explained making Edward sigh before he grudgingly tried the movement again, toning down his complaints to just a pained grimace.

"You know, for all this complaining you seem to be in a surprisingly good mood." Bella noted as although he was grumbling, he was still smiling in between the grimaces and his tone was a lot more light hearted than she would have expected considering he was genuinely in pain.

"Carlisle said I might get to go home soon and I can't wait to get out of here." He explained before Dan moved to help him stretch his arm backwards and his smile vanished instantly to be replaced by pain as Edward sharply pulled his arm out of Dan's grip, crying out as he did and beginning to shake.

"Edward what is it?" Bella asked, rising to her feet to get closer, all traces of humour gone as she noticed that his eyes didn't seem focused. Dan reached for his shoulder in an attempt to see if something had pulled badly but Edward cowered away from his touch.

"Where does it hurt?" He asked but Edward didn't answer and Bella started to piece together what was going on having seen the same vacant look in his eyes before. He wasn't with them in the room anymore.

"His memories of the night he was attacked have been coming back. I think another one might just have been triggered." She commented to Dan before she moved closer and reached out, cupping Edward's cheek and stroking his skin lightly with her thumb while Dan backed away to give Edward some space, "Edward you're ok, you're safe. James isn't here."

"Hurts." He murmured but his eyes refocused on Bella even if he did still seem a little lost.

"I know but you're safe. It's ok." She responded, leaning forward and kissing his forehead before stroking her other hand through his hair which was enough to bring him back from his memories.

"Bella?" He asked unsurely, his gaze flickering between her and Dan.

"I'm here. It was just a memory, you're safe." She repeated to which Edward took a deep breath before he nodded. He could see he was safe, he was in his hospital room, not his kitchen and James definitely wasn't there.

"Sorry, that was weird." He murmured, flushing slightly with embarrassment as he registered both Bella and Dan watching him closely.

"What did I tell you before about apologising?" Bella scolded lightly as she messed his hair up before sitting back down, relieved he seemed to be ok again although she let him claim her hand when he reached for it.

"Can you tell me what happened? Where it hurts?" Dan asked, stepping closer again since Edward appeared calm once more and breaking his focus from Bella.

"It was just when it went back...it threw me. It felt like when they were tied behind my back and I got a flash of James pulling them up and forcing my shoulder out. He tipped the spiked water down my throat when I cried out from the pain." He explained, feeling like he needed them to understand to explain his weird behaviour. He didn't like spacing out like that in front of people.

"Was there any new pain or was it just the memory?" Dan questioned, eyeing the affected area carefully.

"A little new, all the movements have hurt." He answered as it really hadn't been any worse than any of the other tests Dan had made him do. It was just something about the positioning, along with the burst of pain that had thrown him back into his kitchen.

"Ok, well if you feel up to it there's just a couple more things we could do with running through and then I can pass the message on to your doctor that you're good to go. Of course you'll have to come back in for some sessions and continue the exercises at home but as far as your shoulder is concerned you shouldn't need to stay here any longer." Dan commented and lured with the promise of home Edward agreed to go through the rest of the exercises for his shoulder. He also explained a little about what they'd need to do for Edward's leg to restore proper mobility to his knee but they had to wait until he was out of the cast before they could start any of it. Bella paid close attention to everything he said, especially when he demonstrated how to massage his shoulder and promised Dan again that she'd make sure Edward kept up the exercises in between appointments before he left.

"You really need to speak to Detective Jenks soon." Bella commented as soon as they were on their own, stroking the back of his hand with her thumb to offer comfort as she knew he wouldn't really want to think about any of it.

"I know, I asked Carlisle to call him for me this morning. I think I've remembered most of it, the important parts at least anyway."

"More dreams last night?"

"Not last night no, but just before you and Lucy came back from the toilettes yesterday I had one and then an argument with Emmett brought some things up."

"Why didn't you tell me? And an argument with Emmett? That doesn't sound good."

"Lucy distracted me with the parents evening thing and it wasn't but it was his fault. I told him we couldn't talk about it but he kept insisting and I said things I probably shouldn't have."

"What kind of things?"

"That everything that's happened was his fault."

"And was it?" Bella asked looking a little sceptical although Edward could see a flash of anger in her eyes and he knew she'd take his side and probably have a go at Emmett as well if he let her and while her protectiveness of him still astounded him he didn't want to get her involved. He already felt slightly guilty for letting Emmett leave believing he hated him, he didn't need anyone else yelling at him as well.

"Kind of? I don't know really, I mean it was James' messed up logic that was the real cause I guess but it was a grudge against Emmett that started it all." He answered her and she relaxed back into her chair slightly which he was glad for as he really didn't want to talk about any of it in any more detail.

"Ah, that must have been hard for him to hear." She commented and when Edward didn't respond she got the message, "You'd rather not talk about this right?"

"I'm sorry but yeah. I know I probably over reacted about things but right now I can't change how I feel about it and talking about it all will only make it worse."

"That's ok, you can tell me about it if and when you're ready." She replied, allowing him to relax as well as he squeezed her hand gently to relay his gratitude for her understanding.

"I will. Tell me about your night instead though? Did you sleep ok?" He asked, starting to look a little anxious as he studied her and noticed she still looked tired.

"Not really, but it meant I got to have a good talk with my mum. She had some pretty good advice." Bella responded, smiling a little to let him know she really was ok.

"Advice about what?" He asked curiously, feeling oddly nervous even though Bella said it was good advice.

"Everything really, she suggested we should make some plans for when you're out of here and up and about again. Give us all something to look forward to rather than dwelling constantly on what's already happened or could have happened." She explained, allowing Edward to relax again.

"That's actually a really good idea but you realise that it's going to be a while before we can actually do anything right? I think they said the cast will be on for at least a month and you heard what Dan said about needing physiotherapy for my knee once it is off."

"Of course but it gives us something to work towards anyway and I'm sure we can come up with a few things to do at home. Lucy will defiantly have some ideas."

"Just being home is enough to look forward to. I know Lucy's been in here every day but seeing her for a couple of hours just isn't enough." He commented making Bella squeeze his hand gently in comfort.

"I know, she feels exactly the same way. We're all looking forward to having you home. I'll definitely be glad to trade in the hospital canteen food for Esme's cooking." She joked which made Edward's crooked smile reappear for the first time.

"So you're planning on hanging around at their house a lot then?" He asked and though he was teasing Bella noticed the slight hint of doubt in his voice.

"Yup, if that's where you'll be then I'll be visiting a lot. Esme's already told me I'm welcome whenever I want." She responded lightly, loving the way Edward's smile grew and his eyes glinted with joy.

"Good, I've got used to having you around all the time. I like it." He stated quietly, just the hint of a blush appearing as he admitted it so to put him at ease Bella leant forward and gently kissed him.

"I like it too." She commented once she'd settled back and Edward just smiled back at her so after taking a moment to bask in the sentiment Bella ploughed straight in to her aim for the day, "So...what else do you like? We've only ever got as far as Lucy and music before. There's got to be something else...and I don't care how random, silly or apparently unfeasible it is. "

They needed something to look forward to and to work out just what that could be she needed to know what kind of things Edward was actually into which was something she had realised during the night that she had very little idea about.

Somehow he'd always managed to turn questions around to her and she suspected that given his nature to stick to himself and the very minimal life he'd been living that that had always been his intention. He either hadn't wanted her to get to know him, which was now a redundant reason to avoid answering since he clearly did want to get closer to her or he hadn't wanted to think about things he could no longer have. Again that reason no longer stood considering he now had a large selection of willing baby sitters to choose from and an aunt and uncle who wanted to spoil him if he'd only let them.

She wasn't going to let him avoid answering again and so they spent the rest of the morning teasing out every one of Edward's likes and dislikes and discovering the things he'd missed being able to do. From even the really mundane things like films he'd missed seeing to places he'd always wanted to take Lucy and bands he wanted to see play. Bella wanted to know it all and by the time she was heading for the canteen in search of lunch she had plenty of ideas for things they could do and places they could go once he was better but for the time being they also had a massive list of films to get Edward caught up on and a movie night with him and Lucy once he was home sounded really good. They just had to work out which films to watch first.

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><p>"Esme?" Lucy asked as they walked over to her car.<p>

"Hmm?" She didn't look up from her phone as she distractedly answered and Lucy's brow furrowed as she watched her. Normally Esme was all too eager to chat but she'd already been frowning at her phone when Lucy had run up to her at the school gates and though she'd greeted her with a smile and asked how school had been she hadn't really been paying attention.

"What's wrong?" She asked and Esme paused, her hand on the back door ready to open it as she looked down at Lucy.

"Nothing's wrong sweetheart. Come on, in the car and we can go see your daddy." She responded with a glittering smile that didn't quite reach her eyes and Lucy's head tilted to one side as her eyes narrowed but Esme's attention had fallen to her phone again as she pulled the door open for her so Lucy sighed before climbing in.

Once on the road, the radio was playing but the car was otherwise silent. Lucy had watched as Esme put on the Bluetooth headset for her phone and continued to puzzle over her odd behaviour as she pressed buttons on her mobile every time they came to a stop at traffic lights. Something was obviously bothering her and Lucy didn't like it.

"Who are you trying to call?" She asked after the sixth time Esme tried to call someone. She saw Esme's eyes shift to hers in the rear view mirror but couldn't see enough of her face to correctly judge her expression.

"I'm just trying to get hold of your uncle. He isn't answering his phone." She grudgingly explained and Lucy's curiosity was piqued again.

"Maybe he's still with Daddy. You can't have mobile phones on in the hospital." She suggested and saw Esme glance to her again before the light changed and her focus went back to the road.

"That's right but I don't think he's there. Bella's with your daddy right now."

"Maybe he's put his phone down somewhere and forgotten it." Lucy suggested as it seemed like the type of thing he'd do. He got distracted easily sometimes.

"I think you might be right, he can be pretty silly can't he?" Esme acquiesced and Lucy murmured her agreement but noticed the way Esme's shoulders relaxed a little as she assumed the questions had come to an end.

Lucy wasn't convinced.

"Why do you need to call him?" She broke the silence again a few minutes later.

"Oh no real reason. I just wanted to know what he wanted for dinner." Esme answered, "You don't need to worry about it. Why don't you tell me what you did at school today?"

"I already told you about school." She huffed, "And Uncle Emmett will eat anything. Can we have spaghetti?"

"Of course you did, I'm sorry honey, I'm all over the place today and spaghetti's a great idea for dinner, thank you. Does ice cream sound good for dessert?"

After checking it was strawberry flavoured Lucy happily agreed it was a good idea and she took pity on Esme since she was so obviously flustered and dropped her questioning for the rest of the journey to the hospital, contenting herself by playing with the doll that had been left on the seat beside her.

When they finally reached Edward's room at the hospital Lucy ran straight to Edward's bed, pausing briefly to say hello to Bella who picked her up and sat her on the edge of Edward's bed allowing her to scrambled closer and hug his arm.

"You look better." She commented, pulling back and looking up at his face to find him smiling at her. He seemed a lot brighter and the sling was missing from his other arm.

"I feel it too. I might get to come home tomorrow." He told her and she squealed excitedly before hugging his arm tightly again.

"Well that's good news, when we will get to know for sure?" Esme asked, taking up the seat on the other side of his bed.

"Not sure, my doctor wanted to speak to Carlisle first." Edward answered before looking back to Lucy and being slammed with the unbearable urge to pull her into his arms and hug her. She looked so excited at the prospect of having him home and he wanted to join her in that but hugs were still a little difficult. The sling may have been off but the tests and exercises Dan had forced on him had made his shoulder ache worse than it had before and his ribs were still very delicate. Then again, as Dan had pointed out, he needed to move to help him heal without any stiffness so he pulled his arm out of Lucy's grasp and pushed himself up so he was sitting. Pain flared and it took a moment for him to breathe through it but then he was sitting up and it didn't feel too bad so he held his arm out and Lucy shuffled closer, snuggling carefully into his chest and letting him get both arms around her for the first time in what felt like forever.

He buried his face into her hair, just inhaling her scent and feeling the warmth of her against him and everything felt right again. No matter how much fun he'd been having with Bella there was always a part of him that was on edge when ever Lucy wasn't nearby. He pressed a kiss into her hair before he lifted his head again and found both Bella and Esme watching them with soft smiles.

The peaceful moment didn't last long though as he felt Lucy shift slightly in his arms and looked down to meet her narrowed eyes.

"Did you fall out with Uncle Emmett again?" She asked and Edward was surprised enough that he glanced to Esme who looked just as surprised before he looked back to Lucy.

"How do you know that?" He questioned and she rolled her eyes at him.

"Esme's being weird. She kept trying to call him and he wasn't answering but she just said she wanted to know what he wanted for dinner when I asked what was wrong." She explained like it was obvious and though Edward wasn't sure he really wanted her to know they'd had yet another falling out he couldn't help but be slightly amused at how nothing ever got past her. He had no idea how she'd come to be so perceptive, especially with people she hadn't even known that long but she certainly seemed to have a read on everyone around them.

Looking up at Esme again he could see she looked mortified and as she realised he was watching her she mouthed 'I'm sorry' but he just shook his head. Lucy would have found out at some point and he knew it wasn't Esme's fault. She was just worried about Emmett.

"Yes we fell out." He answered Lucy's original question and she sighed and shook her head at him.

"You're getting worse than Bella and Anna." She accused which made both Bella and Edward laugh.

"I'm not sure that's possible Luce." Bella commented knowing the only reason they hadn't fallen out recently was that she was spending all her time at the hospital and not around her little sister.

"I'm sorry; he's just unbelievably annoying at times." Edward tried to explain himself and he could see the smile that was trying to tug at Lucy's lips.

"What did he do this time?" She asked and though he was pleased that she didn't automatically blame him for the fall out he was also aware that it wasn't really fair to let her blame Emmett either.

"He wanted to talk about something that I didn't want to talk about and I may have over reacted. It wasn't all his fault." He explained.

"Are you going to make up with him then?" She asked, scrutinizing him and making him want to squirm even though he was trying to hold as still as possible to avoid aggravating any more pains.

"Eventually."

"You say it's bad to hold grudges." Lucy pointed out and he could see the way Bella was trying to hide her amusement out of the corner of his eye. She was definitely fighting a smile and he couldn't really blame her. Being scolded by his five year old daughter seemed to be a more and more common occurrence and he had to admit it was kind of amusing.

"I know, and it is. We'll sort it out, I just need to take a little time to think about it and calm down." He tried to explain and Lucy sighed before shaking her head.

"I'm glad I don't have a brother or sister. I don't like arguing and falling out." She announced making Edward chuckle as he tightened his arms around her and kissed her head again. He was kind of glad to hear that. He wasn't sure how he'd cope with a second child and it had always been a lurking fear in the back of his mind that one day she would want a sibling and it wasn't something he'd be able to make happen. Although as he glanced up from Lucy and across to Bella the fleeting thought of a little baby with her big brown eyes wasn't all together unappealing but he quickly shoved the thought out of his head and concentrated back on Lucy.

There would be plenty of time for thoughts like that in the more distant future if he somehow managed not to screw things up for them all. Right then they had the more pressing matter to discuss as to just which DVDs they were going to watch on his first night home. He and Bella hadn't quite been able to decide and they'd known Lucy would want a say so now she was there they could finally sort out the first of their plans to look forward to and he really couldn't wait for it. Bella had told him all about the Cullen's entertainment room and he could just imagine spending an evening cuddled up on the sofa with Bella and Lucy and he wanted to experience it more than anything right then.

* * *

><p>Esme and Carlisle had taken Lucy home by the time Detective Jenks showed up in Edward's room. He looked tired and his suit was distinctly wrinkled but he offered a small smile as he settled into the chair opposite Bella's.<p>

"I got Dr. Cullen's message this morning, I'm sorry it took so long for me to get here. It's been one hell of a day and this is the first chance I've had to get out of the station." He said, taking his jacket off and digging through its pockets for a voice recorder and his notebook.

"Thank you for coming." Edward responded a little awkwardly. He was well aware of what he was going to have to tell him and he really didn't want to have to think about it all. Bella had been a wonderful distraction from everything for the day, Renee's advice proving to be exactly what they'd both needed. They had gotten to know each other a lot better and Edward hadn't even realised just how closed off he'd kept himself until Bella had started to ask what films he liked and if there were any places in particular he liked to go. Up until then it had all just been habit to keep those kind of details to himself, after all if he didn't admit what it was he liked, then he couldn't miss it.

It had been a strange but freeing experience to share with her the bits of himself he'd kept hidden and closed off for so long and Bella hadn't been the only one getting to know him. As she'd kept asking questions he'd really had to think about some of them to find an answer. He could have easily have told her Lucy's favourite film or what she enjoyed doing most but there were blank spaces when he tried to find his own answers and he had realised he was going to have to relearn who he was apart from just being Lucy's father. There was a whole other side of him that he'd effectively boxed up and ignored as he'd put everything he had into making sure Lucy was happy and catching glimpses of it made him want to investigate further and he was glad Bella would be there to help him.

Seeing Detective Jenks sitting there though reminded him that before they could move forward to get to that however he had to go back first. They couldn't explore anything if James was hanging over them, shadowing every moment of joy with fear and pain so he was going to have to think about what he'd told him that day in his kitchen and with that came the ramifications of Emmett's involvement. Everyone had been very accommodating in avoiding the topic for the day but having experienced the detective's questioning before he knew he'd want to pick over everything he said. There would be no more avoiding it.

"I should go shouldn't I?" Bella commented as she stood, knowing Detective Jenks would prefer to talk to Edward on his own but Edward reached for her hand so she took it, letting him pull her closer. "I'm just going to go down to the canteen. I'll come back up to say goodbye before I go home."

Edward just stared up at her with wide fearful eyes and she wanted to do anything to take that look away but he had to talk to the detective so instead she leant in and pressed her lips to his, offering what little comfort she could. His hands came up to cup her face and hold her there. It had to be hurting his shoulder so she didn't fight him even though it was a little uncomfortable knowing Detective Jenks was sitting in the room. Edward didn't seem to have the same concern though and it was Bella who eventually had to pull back when he tried to deepen it.

"You'll be fine, it's just memories and they can't hurt you, you're safe now and I'll be back soon. I'll even stay tonight if you want." She murmured, still being held by him and her words seemed to ease him a little as he let go but he still didn't look happy.

"I love you." She promised leaning in to kiss his forehead before she straightened and stepped back.

"If he gets panicked, call a nurse." She warned Detective Jenks who nodded, assuring her that he would so with a final reassuring smile for Edward she left them alone and made her way to the canteen.

"Are you ok to do this?" Detective Jenks asked as he watched Edward trying to gather himself. It was very apparent that he was uncomfortable.

"Does that really matter? You need to know what happened." Edward muttered sullenly wishing more than anything that Bella could have stayed. She kept him grounded.

"Ok, well if you need to take a break at any point let me know. Your memory is coming back I take it?" Detective Jenks asked to ensure he'd understood the message Carlisle had left him correctly and Edward nodded.

"In bits, yeah."

"Ok, so...what's the first thing you remember?" Jenks started them off seeing that he was going to have to coax the information out of him. Edward was acting far too reluctant to just blurt it all out.

He did answer his questions though, explaining how James had got the drugs into him and then the little he could remember of the following conversation. As he spoke it was frustrating when the memory cut out. He knew there was more to the conversation from what Riley had told him but he was being careful to only tell the detective the parts he actually remembered so they only got as far as James revealing his motivation for the original drugging and he couldn't offer any explanations as to why James had attacked him again.

Even all the questions Jenks fired at him didn't bring any more of it back and seeing Edward's frustration growing he moved on to asking what the next thing he remembered was so he described seeing James pin Riley to the wall by his throat. There were a lot more question about that, whether he could remember what was being said, if he had any idea what had caused them to fight with each other and what happened after it, where Riley went but Edward couldn't answer any of them, all he could do was describe the way James had pinned him so they moved on again.

The actual attack was the part he could describe in the most detail and Detective Jenks had to ask fewer questions as Edward freely offered up what he could knowing that if he could once get it all out it would all be over and Bella could come back.

He told him how James had kicked his knee, knocking him to the floor and shattering the chair and his reaction to the phones ringing. Then he described how he'd picked up the chair leg and beaten him with it and his own struggle to try and get to his phone and call for help before James had stamped on his leg and broken it. His descriptions got a little hazier after that as he'd been having trouble staying conscious but he tried his best to describe what he did remember ending with how he'd written James' name on the floor under the belief he was dying and wouldn't be able to tell anyone any other way who had hurt him.

By the end of it Edward was upset but managing to hold it together long enough to assure Detective Jenks he was ok and hear that while it would help their case against James it wasn't a sure thing considering the problems Edward had had with his memory. Jenks made it clear that any defence lawyer James hired would no doubt try to discredit his account of the evening as his memories could have been affected by outside suggestions. He was fairly confident though as what Edward had told him did match up to his injuries and the evidence they'd already gathered.

It still left Edward with mixed feelings though as he was left to wonder if any good would actually come from him remembering or if he would have just been better off taking the drugs Carlisle had offered to get a peaceful night's sleep as at least then he probably wouldn't have gotten so angry with Emmett. It was too late to change anything though so he just had to hope the memories would be enough to end things with James.

Bella returned not long after Detective Jenks left and after Edward told her what he'd said about the possibility of his account of things being discredited and seeing he was upset she decided she was staying exactly where she was for the night. There was no way she could leave him like that and she knew he'd just end up over thinking it all if he was left on his own. He needed a distraction.

"It's only for one more night anyway, you're going home tomorrow." She'd pointed out when Edward had tried to argue that she should go home and he'd given in quickly as he hadn't really want her to leave anyway and she was right about it being the last time she'd have to do it. Carlisle had shared the good news that he'd spoken to his doctor and he was going home when he'd stopped in to visit at the end of his shift.

They talked for a little while, Bella describing what she'd seen of the Cullen house in a little more detail for him in the hope of distracting him and giving him something more pleasant to think about before he fell asleep and when his eyes started to droop she kissed him goodnight and ran her hand through his hair until they closed completely for the night. Then she sat back in her chair, pulled her feet up onto it and wrapped her arms around her knees as she watched him sleep hoping he'd find a pleasant dream for once.

* * *

><p>The shrill ringing of the doorbell woke Esme and Carlisle from where they'd fallen asleep curled up together on the sofa in the entertainment room watching a DVD as they waited for Emmett to come home.<p>

They hurried to get up, not wanting whoever was at the door to ring the bell again and risk waking Lucy and a glance at the clock on their way into the hall showed it to be two in the morning. That flooded panic through them as they realised Emmett still hadn't come home and it wasn't usually good news when someone called round so late.

Esme hung back a little as Carlisle pulled open the door until she saw Rosalie struggling under the weight of Emmett as she tried to keep him on his feet. There wasn't a mark on him but Esme could smell the alcohol before she'd even moved up to hold the door open while Carlisle pulled Emmett's arm around his shoulders and wound his own around his waist to take the weight off Rosalie.

"I'm sorry it's so late. He called me an hour ago and when I got to the club he was in he was already like his. He was trying to pick a fight with anyone who so much as looked at him and it took a while to convince him he needed to leave." Rosalie explained as Carlisle started to guide Emmett into the house and through to the kitchen.

"Don't worry about the time, just thank you for bringing him home. We've been trying to get hold of him all day." Esme responded, ushering Rosalie in as well before she shut and locked the front door.

"Do you know what's going on with him? The only thing he's said that I've been able to make out is that something is all his fault."

"He had a falling out with Edward last night. Some things were said that probably shouldn't have been and it looks as though he's taking it pretty hard."

"What? Edward can't seriously think what that psychopath did to him was Emmett's fault surely?" Rosalie questioned, quickly putting everything together and not liking what it meant at all.

"Not really, but he was angry and Emmett was there trying to make him talk about it and he was involved at the beginning of it all. Edward just lashed out and Emmett ran off before any of us could try and talk to him." Esme responded as they reached the kitchen where Carlisle had managed to get Emmett sat down at the breakfast bar.

"We need to get him sober." He commented, already heading to the coffee maker and turning it on before he got a large glass out and filled it with water. Esme got to work making toast and Rosalie watched as Carlisle tried to get Emmett to drink the water. He wasn't co-operating and kept trying to push the glass away so she stepped in, taking it out of Carlisle's hand as she forced Emmett's head up to look at her with a hand on his chin.

"If you want to stand any chance of me agreeing to go on date with you, you will drink this and sober up." She stated forcefully. Emmett blinked, swayed a little in his chair and then finally took the glass from her and downed it.

"Thank you." Carlisle said gratefully, glad she could still get through to him at least. "You're very welcome to stay here tonight if you want; it's too late to be out and it looks like we could use your help."

"That would be good, thank you. I want to see what he's got to say for himself when he sobers up anyway." She commented, "He woke me up for this and he's not getting away with it easily."

For all her words were harsh, Esme and Carlisle could both see they were born from concerned affection and they hoped she'd be able to scare Emmett enough once he was sober to stop him from drinking himself into a stupor ever again. It wasn't an answer to anything and they were more than a little annoyed with him themselves for worrying them by going off and not answering his phone all day.

Before anyone could berate him for his poor choice of coping method however they really needed to get him sobered up. A point that was made all the more clear when Carlisle moved away to find a bottle of aspirin and Emmett slid straight off his stool to crash onto the floor which he seemed to find hilariously funny as he started to giggle.

It was going to be a long night.

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><p><em>AN - Thank you again for reading and for the reviews :)<em>


	45. Chapter 43 Brothers

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 43 - Brothers<strong>

Emmett felt terrible.

He had the worst headache he'd ever experienced and that was before he opened his eyes.

Opening them brought the pain into sharp focus behind his eyes and his already queasy stomach rolled. There was barely time for him to register he was in bed in his room at the Cullen household before he lurched in the direction of the bathroom only just making it in time for his stomach to empty its contents.

Staying where he was, collapsed on the floor in front of the toilette he tried to remember what he'd done the day before to end up with the worst hang over of his life and came up blank.

He was just thinking he could understand why Edward found the gaps in his memory so frustrating when it all came flooding back - trying to get Edward to talk to him, his following rant and the crushing knowledge that he'd been the reason behind James' vendetta.

After hearing what Edward had to say he'd given him the space he'd obviously wanted and left him in piece, spending the rest of the night sitting on the floor in the corridor outside his door as no matter how angry Edward was with him he hadn't been able to leave him completely on his own. When Carlisle had arrived though there'd been no reason for him to stay, Edward certainly hadn't wanted him there and he'd known Carlisle would look after him so there had been nothing left for him to do except leave.

With nowhere to go he'd ended up just driving around for a while, unable to face anyone with Edward's words still repeating themselves constantly in his head. Their meaning was all he could think about. The tears had stopped sometime during the night but the crushing guilt had only intensified with time. No matter how he tried to think around it he always came to the same conclusion; it was his irresponsible behaviour that had destroyed his little brother's entire world and while Edward had been struggling just to survive he'd continued living the life of luxury their parents provided. A life he now knew he'd never deserved.

At the time he hadn't even thought twice about dating Victoria and then cheating on her. She'd been a challenge. Her outward appearance and crazy personality had made her stand out as something different to the clones that made up the popular crowd at their school and he'd been unable to resist the draw to her. Unfortunately, first impressions weren't everything and what he'd thought would be a challenge to catch ended up being nothing but a challenge to get away from. She'd fallen for his charms much faster than he'd anticipated and her craziness had quickly shown itself to be bordering on possessive. When she had declared she was falling for him after only a couple of weeks that had been all the warning he'd needed and he'd done the easiest thing he could to make sure she got the message that he didn't feel the same way about her. Lauren had been yet another easy target and when he heard nothing more from Victoria after she'd caught them together he'd congratulated himself on a plan well done.

To know now that that had put the idea for revenge in James' head made him sick. He'd never really meant anyone any harm. The popularity at school had gone to his head and he'd made the most of it. Everyone had wanted to be seen around him and the girls had all flirted with him. At the time he never saw the problem in enjoying the attention and he'd always assumed that the girls he got involved with knew what they were getting themselves into. His reputation had been big enough to go before him and none of the girls had ever seemed to expect anything more from him than what he'd offered. Of course looking back on it that was probably where he'd gone so wrong with Victoria. She hadn't been from their school so she'd had no idea who he was. It hadn't just been a game to her and unfortunately she just had to be the one girl James was interested in.

Unable to stand his own thoughts and the guilt they brought with them any longer he'd abandoned his car in a random car park whose location he could no longer remember and had headed into the first bar he'd found to drown his thoughts in alcohol. It had seemed like a good idea at the time although now he wasn't so sure.

He could remember the first couple of pubs he'd entered. The drinking had started slow but steadily and he couldn't remember eating anything so from there his recollections got increasingly fuzzy.

There were flashes from at least three different clubs and he could vaguely remember trying to start fights when it became apparent the alcohol wasn't enough to quiet the screaming guilt he felt. He'd wanted to hurt, to feel some of the pain he'd caused for himself. It had felt like the only thing that could make it easier to bear. A quick glance over himself proved he couldn't have been very successful as the skin not hidden by his boxers and t-shirt that still reeked of alcohol appeared to be unscathed yet he could remember nothing after that point.

How he'd managed to get home he had absolutely no idea.

Realising he couldn't spend the rest of his life feeling sorry for himself on a bathroom floor he pulled himself back to his feet, pausing to lean against the wall as he waited for the room to stop spinning. Once sure he wasn't going to be sick or lose his balance he slowly made his way out of his room and down the stairs figuring that some coffee and possibly something to eat might make him feel a little better.

Stumbling into the kitchen he froze like a deer in headlights when he spotted Rosalie, Esme and Carlisle all sitting around the breakfast bench waiting for him.

"Feeling a little rough?" Rosalie asked, pinning him with a cold glare and suddenly the thought of spending the rest of his life in his bathroom didn't seem like such a bad idea but it was already too late to retreat.

At least he had the answer for how he'd made it home.

* * *

><p>Edward woke with a start and was instantly glad to be out of the darkness and under the bright lights of his room. His heart was beating too fast but he was just relieved to be able to feel it and as he looked over to his right he started to calm down seeing Bella curled up in her chair and fast asleep.<p>

The darkness had felt so real and it was worse than any of his other nightmares because while on some level he had known it was a dream he still hadn't been sure he was going to wake up from it. There was nothing else to the dream, just the never ending, empty darkness which felt like it was pulling at him, sucking him into the nothingness. Thoughts of Lucy and Bella crossed his mind but drifted half formed as fast as they came, being swallowed by the darkness just as he was. There was a certainty to it that he'd already lost everything making it feel like there was nothing else for him to do except give in and fade away and it terrified him.

He was so certain it was real that waking up was nothing short of a miracle and to wake up and find Bella beside him was even more so. He was so glad he'd been given a second chance. That they'd been able to bring him back and the darkness was banished to just haunting his sleep. He could live with that so long as he got to wake up.

With how it felt to have lost everything fresh in his mind it put things into perspective. Everything that had happened just didn't matter, not really. He knew he couldn't just forget it. It had happened and it had left its scars and reminders, both physical and mental but he had survived and that was the important part. He would get better, he would get to see Lucy grow up, he would get the chance to explore what was between himself and Bella and maybe even rediscover what it was like to have family around him again even if it was headed by his aunt and uncle rather than his parents which was a lot more than he ever could have hoped for less than a year ago.

James had caused his damage but there were so many other things he ought to have been focusing on and Edward was only just starting to realise that the longer he held onto the bad points, the more damage he was allowing James to create. He'd wanted to destroy their family and he'd succeeded. He'd wanted to make him suffer like his sister had and he'd succeeded. He'd wanted to make Emmett hurt and he'd succeeded but Edward was the one letting him do it. Yet while he really didn't want to be James' weapon, even tentatively thinking about Emmett made his anger resurface. He just couldn't help it. Emmett had acted irresponsibly and without a care for anyone else's feelings and it had torn his life apart, made it into nothing more than someone else's idea of a game.

As soon as that thought crossed his mind he was already scolding himself.

That was the anger of his sixteen year old self, the one who'd been thrown out and abandoned, forced to take on a child he wasn't even sure he wanted. He wasn't that boy anymore. He'd grown and matured and turned into the man who could call himself Lucy's father.

He loved his little girl more than anything else in his life, more than anyone else, so what did it matter that he'd lost everything else when he had her? If Emmett hadn't riled James then he wouldn't have had Lucy and he couldn't live without her so how could he be angry at him for giving him his life?

He wasn't even sure if it was entirely fair be angry at Emmett for something he'd done so many years ago anyway. He had only been sixteen at the time he dated Victoria and while even then his actions had been wrong, they had been nothing too unusual for a teenager in Emmett's position. The fact James had chosen to take up his anger through Edward rather than going straight to Emmett was not Emmett's fault. He doubted Emmett even knew James had liked Victoria at the time so the worst he could have anticipated from his actions was an irate ex-girlfriend with a broken heart. He had no reason to suspect James would ever go after him.

Unfortunately it wasn't just that one instant that fuelled Edward's anger though. He could probably have forgiven Emmett quickly if it had been but his anger had developed from a combination of things, some of which had been festering for years and the new knowledge was just the trigger that exposed it all. There was the way he'd so easily backed down and watched their father throw him out the door, the years in between where he hadn't tried to find him, the ridiculous trip to their parents' house he'd talked them into, the way he'd not come after him, even if it was just to make sure they made it home ok when they'd left, the way he'd just assumed Edward to be the boy everyone else thought him to be, rather than paying attention to who he actually was and then of course the way he'd provoked James once more putting Lucy in danger.

Yet, despite all that, Edward did still want his brother in his life and he always had. Emmett just made it so hard. There were too many conflicting thoughts. Too many reason to push him as far from his life as he could and yet too many reason to want him around. Emmett had tried his best to look after him, he'd risked a lot and in the end he had walked away from his job and their parents to be there for him. He was family and Edward had learnt the hard way that that wasn't to be taken for granted so he should have been clinging on to him for all he was worth.

He wanted the easy relationship they'd once shared back.

They hadn't been extremely close during their teenage years. Their personalities were too different but he'd known Emmett was there for him when he'd needed him. They'd never had problems talking when it mattered and it had always been Emmett who encouraged him when their father just berated them. They'd been close in their own way and had things gone the way they should have he was certain that would have only changed for the better once the pettiness and popularity contests of being a teenager were behind them. The constant arguing they seemed to fall into instead just wasn't right yet it was seemingly unavoidable. He wanted to forgive and forget but he just couldn't shake off that angry sixteen year old who felt nothing in his life was fair and who now had a target to pin the blame to.

His head was starting to ache.

"What are you thinking about so hard?"

Bella's sleepy voice startled him and when he looked to her, his eyes wide with surprise she smiled softly and he found himself shaking his head to dispel the pleasant daze it put him under.

"Emmett." He answered vaguely, distracted from his thoughts by how cute she looked as she blinked slowly up at him before she rubbed at her eyes like she was having difficulty waking up fully.

The moment his answer registered she sat up straight in her seat and absentmindedly brushed her hair back behind her ear so she could concentrate on him properly and the smile left his face. She still looked tired making him wonder how long it had taken her to fall asleep the night before but as she was making the effort to wake up enough to focus on him he stayed quiet and just hoped she'd be able to sleep better once he was out of the hospital.

"How's that going?" She finally asked pulling him back from his own thoughts of her with a sigh as he shrugged. He wasn't really sure he wanted to think about Emmett any longer but Bella was usually good at making things make better sense to him so he answered her truthfully.

"Not great."

"Do you want to talk about it?" She questioned seeing his hesitance and willing to drop it if he wanted to avoid the risk of making anything worse than it already was but wanting him to know she'd listen if he needed to talk.

"I don't know...I just want it to go away, it's making my head hurt." He complained which wasn't a total shut down or avoidance so Bella tentatively tried again.

"Too much thinking?"

"Yeah and I just keep going round in circles."

"How so?" She asked thinking he might benefit from sounding his thoughts out on the matter to somebody and she was pleased when Edward didn't back away from the question. Instead he took a minute to think about it, his face clear of his usual annoyance at the subject which was a step in the right direction at least even if he was still obviously uncomfortable with it which showed in his furrowed brow and the way he was fidgeting with his covers, pulling at a loose thread he'd found near his hand.

"He's my brother and I like having him around." He finally responded, "We were never particularly close but I always knew he would be there if I needed him. I want that again. But he's the one who started the whole thing with James and then provoked him again in the club. He wasn't there the one time I needed somebody the most and he didn't even try to find me until several years later. Then he didn't put up much of a fight to stop me walking away from their house when he was the one to talk me into it in the first place and he didn't try to check if we were ok afterwards. Since the first hospital visit he seems to mean well but I just can't trust him. I want him around but at the same time I don't want to be anywhere near him."

"I don't really know what to say." Bella responded, reaching out to take hold of his hand as an attempt to offer some kind of comfort, "I can see why you're angry with him and he has done some really stupid things that are well worth your anger but he is your brother and I think you're right about him meaning well."

"What should I do?" He asked, watching their joined hands as he linked his fingers through hers. Having somebody just tell him what he ought to be thinking or doing sounded like a nice idea just to get anyway from his own messed up thinking and he trusted Bella.

"I don't know, only you can work that out." She said and he frowned at there being no easy solution, "Do you want to talk to him?"

"I'm not sure. We'd probably just end up arguing again." He answered as he really was unable to picture just sitting down and talking to his brother civilly. There was always something that set of his anger and right then it was possible just the sight of him would do it. They wouldn't get anywhere and would probably only succeed at making things worse.

"Then maybe you should give it some time. At least until everything settles down a little. You've had a lot of information thrown at you under an already stressful time." Bella suggested and thinking it through it sounded like a good idea but there were two major problems with it.

"I'm not sure what Lucy would make of that. She's already asking about it and making it clear she doesn't like the arguing." He commented knowing there was enough for her to be unsettled over already without adding a strained atmosphere to the mix if he tried to avoid Emmett. Lucy liked her uncle; she'd want them to be friends.

"She was comparing you guys to me and Anna though so she understands to some extent. Siblings fight, its normal. You'll have a bit of leeway before she starts asking too many questions." Bella countered, "And she'll be too excited to have you home to think about anything else for a while anyway."

Edward had to smile at that as it always cheered him to get reassurance that she hadn't been too bowled over by Esme and Carlisle's spoiling to forget about him but it didn't negate the second problem.

"What about Emmett? We're going to be living in the same house again. He's not just going to let me ignore him."

"Just tell him you need time." Bella shrugged like it was simple, "You've got to do what's right for you with this. You can't let Emmett or anyone else push you into making up with him unless it's what you want otherwise the anger and distrust will just keep festering until it blows up again."

"I've tried telling him I'm not ready to talk and he just doesn't listen. That's why we fell out this time." Edward pointed out, unconvinced that Emmett would just let it go.

"Then maybe he'll finally have learnt his lesson. You're not going to be on your own with him anyway as I'm pretty sure there will always be other people around in the house. We can act as interference between the two of you if you need it. I'm sure I could talk to Rosalie and she'd be able to get him out of the house for a while anyway. I think she's finally getting tired of playing hard to get." Bella responded and it frustrated Edward to know that other people were going to have to go out of their way for him again. They shouldn't have had to do that.

"It shouldn't be like this. Why can't things just be easy for once?" He grumbled out loud making Bella smile sadly at him.

"Because life never is. Take some time, sort everything out in your head and then when you're ready we can work out how to fix things between the pair of you. Until then just try to take things as they come, there's no point getting frustrated and stressed over it. Today's meant to be a good day, you're going home remember?"

"I know," He sighed, "I just woke up so glad to be awake that it got me thinking. It seems kind of stupid to be holding grudges against Emmett when I could easily be dead right now."

"Don't say things like that." Bella hissed, tightening her grip on his hand before she relaxed it and tried to smooth over her harsh response. "I can't stand thinking about you being gone."

"I'm sorry, I don't much like the idea of it myself." He replied, gently tugging on her arm in an attempt to get her to move closer.

"Right, let's not talk about it ever again then." She stated, repressing a shudder as the image of him cold and unmoving from her nightmares resurfaced before she could block it but she followed Edward's silent request and stood from her seat to move closer.

"Ok. I love you." He offered with a small smile and Bella couldn't help but smile back before he tugged her hand again making her lean down to be within reach.

"Now that's a much better topic. I love you too." She responded, not needing any more encouragement to close the final distance between them and lightly press her lips to his.

She pulled back before Edward was ready to let her go but he couldn't grumble too much as he looked at her, all flushed and smiling with reddened lips. It was a look that completely wiped any rational thoughts away from him.

Only moments later his door opened and Molly entered along with an orderly carrying his breakfast tray and advised that he best eat it all as they were going to have a busy morning ahead of them.

* * *

><p>"Take a seat." Carlisle instructed, pointing to the unoccupied stool across from him. His voice was stern, as was his expression and a quick glance to Esme showed they were a united front as she looked just as serious. Knowing he couldn't avoid what was about to transpire Emmett dutifully shuffled his way to the seat Carlisle had indicated, being careful not to look at Rosalie who he could feel watching him. One look at her glare earlier was enough.<p>

Once he was seated, Esme stood and retrieved a cup of coffee for him before returning to her seat beside Carlisle. They let him stew for a minute as he took a sip from his coffee and fidgeted before Carlisle spoke again.

"Would you like to explain what on earth you thought you were doing yesterday? We were worried sick about you when you weren't answering your phone and didn't come home."

"I'm sorry. I wasn't really thinking very clearly and drinking it away seemed like a good idea at the time." Emmett answered knowing his response was woefully inadequate but unsure what else there was he could say.

"Aside from the worry you caused us and the inconvenience to Rosalie do you have any idea how dangerous it was? If Rosalie hadn't brought you home when she did you no doubt would have been joining Edward in hospital with alcohol poisoning." Carlisle continued as if Emmett hadn't spoken.

"I know, I really am sorry and I won't be doing it again." Emmett assured them, wishing the ground would open up and swallow him. Carlisle and Esme had shown nothing but kindness towards him, taking him in and looking after them all and he'd repaid them by acting like an idiot again and making them worry. He hadn't thought he could feel any worse than he already did but somehow he was managing it.

"Why didn't you talk to any us? Alcohol is never the answer to anything." Esme joined in the conversation, some of her worry starting to show through as it became clear from Emmett's downtrodden demeanour that he knew he'd been stupid and didn't really need any further berating.

"I couldn't. I can't even stand it myself, I couldn't face anyone. I just wanted it to go away." He muttered, staring into his coffee in an attempt to avoid everyone's stare.

"I spoke to Edward after you left yesterday and I know what he said to you but what's happened to him was not your fault Emmett. Even Edward admitted as much. You pushed him too much when he wasn't ready and he snapped. He didn't really mean it. You just gave him a target for his anger at the situation." Carlisle explained but Emmett looked up at that and shook his head sadly.

"He should mean it. It's true after all. James went after him because of what I did to Victoria and because Jessica thought he was ignoring her in favour of her friends. Those rumours about Edward were only started in the first place as everyone assumed he was like me."

"You didn't make James choose to take his anger out on Edward and you certainly didn't make him do what he did. Edward knows that, you just need to give him some time." Carlisle continued to argue but Emmett couldn't bear it. He didn't deserve their comfort. He hadn't wanted to explain exactly why everything was his fault as he had never really wanted them to know the person he used to be but they had to understand as hearing them try to tell him everything was ok was somehow worse than the shame of them knowing what he'd done. Things were not ok, they probably never would be and it was entirely his fault.

"That doesn't matter!" He snapped, "James being crazy doesn't change the fact it was me who set him off. Do you even know what I did? I chased after Victoria because I was bored and she seemed like a challenge. When I found out she wasn't I wanted to get rid of her but she was clingy and didn't get the message so I cheated on her, knowing that she'd walk in and catch me. It was a stupid game I played just because I could. The girls at our school knew what to expect as they all knew my reputation but Victoria didn't. Edward's life was ruined because I chased the wrong girl and broke her heart."

As they stared at him, taken aback by his outburst, Emmett knew he couldn't stay there any longer. He didn't want to see their disappointment and disgust at what he'd done and he definitely didn't want to stay and find out what Rosalie thought of him. There was no way she'd want anything to do with him knowing how he'd treated girls in the past even if he had changed since then. The games had stopped the instant Edward was gone but he didn't think that was much of a character reference when the initial reasons behind the change had been he was too scared of ending up in the same situation as Edward to risk sleeping around any longer and their father had gotten a lot stricter with only two children left to focus on which had drastically cut into his spare time and his ability to sneak out of the house.

Rosalie totally threw him however when it was her who spoke as he stood from his stool and turned for the door.

"Sit right back down now." She ordered and it was automatic for him to obey as he sank back into his seat. "There's no doubt you were an idiot of the worst kind but that just made you a teenage boy. Bella warned me of the games you used to play but I already knew them. You aren't the only guy to act that way and you can't take on the responsibility for James' actions. If he had a problem with you he should have gone to you, that's what any normal person would do. The fact he chose Edward just shows him to be a coward and a bully."

"She's right." Esme commented, "And what's important is not what you did then but what you do now."

"And what exactly am I meant to do? There's nothing I could do to make this up to Edward. I ruined his life!"

"I don't think Edward see's it that way. His life changed, there's no disputing that but he loves Lucy and I doubt he can imagine or would want a life without her. The best thing any of us can do for him now is just be there for him. He lost his family and by the looks of things he took that hard. Just be there when he needs you and give him back the brother he lost." Carlisle suggested but Emmett doubted that was what Edward wanted.

"He doesn't want me around. He won't talk to me, not about anything important. He doesn't ask for my help and he certainly doesn't want my company." He argued miserably.

"Give him time and he will." Carlisle encouraged but Emmett just couldn't see it.

"He's not going to change his mind. He already talks to Bella about everything, he even talks to you so he's obviously ready to talk about it but he refuses to say anything to me. I'm his brother yet he'd rather talk to people he hardly knows."

"Well what do you expect?" Rosalie jumped in and seeing Emmett's confused stare she sighed before continuing, "Sure you're his brother and that ought to mean something but you're also the one whose let him down. Now I'm not saying that's your fault, well not entirely, but it doesn't change the fact that as far as you're concerned his trust is broken and I know I don't really know him that well but he doesn't seem the type to trust easily."

"He trusted Bella easily enough." He grumbled making Rosalie shake her head at him.

"No he didn't. He kept her at arm's length for long enough and pushed her away but she didn't give up on him. She was there for him when he needed it even when he didn't realise it at the time and she's proved to him that she wants to be there and isn't going to just walk away when things get hard. She's patient and lets him go to her at his own pace rather than trying to force anything.

What's he got to go on from you? You didn't try to find him until recently and when you did find him you let him walk away from you when things got awkward with your parents. You stepped up when he was in hospital, but as far as he's concerned that was probably out of obligation and not a desire to be there for him. You went against his wishes by confronting James only making things worse and from what Bella's told me you have a habit of asking him the wrong questions and saying the wrong things, giving him the impression that you see him poorly.

We all know you have good intentions but you need to give Edward some time and space to see that. Be there for him but when he asks you to, not when you think it would be a good time. Good consistency over time is the only way you'll earn his trust back."

"Rosalie's right again. He trusts Bella more than any of the rest of us and we're always going to have more of a struggle with him as he learnt that he couldn't rely on family and he doesn't want to open himself up to that kind of pain again. I think the only reason he isn't so harsh with Esme and myself is that he didn't know of us before and he can relate to the situation that estranged us from you all." Carlisle added and then they gave Emmett a minute to absorb it all as they sat in silence, letting him come to the conclusion that they were right. The problem was he didn't see how it would be possible to give Edward space when they lived together especially as with no job, he'd be the one most likely to be in to take care of him.

"How do I give him space when we're living in the same house? Should I move out?" He asked after a while coming to the conclusion that it was probably the only option if he wanted things to improve with Edward even if he didn't know where he could go. There was no way he was ever going to go back to their parents' house even though their mother had made it clear he and Alice were wanted home.

"Actually, I was thinking about that last night. You did admin work for your father right?" Esme asked and Emmett nodded so she continued, "Good. Well you were originally going to be the one here the most to look after Edward but obviously now that isn't the best of ideas. Edward can't be left on his own just yet either though so I'm going to have to spend less time at the office and while there's a lot I can do from home, some of the paperwork has to be done there. What I was thinking was that if you could take over some of that for me it would make things easier. I can look after Edward and you can get some time away from the house with the added benefit that you won't be unemployed anymore."

"I really appreciate the offer but are you sure you want to let me loose in your office? It's no secret that I wasn't very good at what I did." Emmett responded awkwardly thinking that the work his father had given him to do had been pretty basic and he still seemed to be called up half the time for making mistakes.

"I'm sure. You'll be great. If it was your father who told you, you were bad at what you did I wouldn't believe a word he said. No one could ever reach his ridiculous standards." She responded confidently so Emmett could only say yes to her proposal. It was the perfect solution for everyone. Esme got to spend more time at home which suited both her and Edward, he wouldn't be tempted to push things too soon with Edward as he wouldn't be there constantly and he was even saved from needing his father to give him a good reference in order to get a new job. The offer was a lot more than he deserved so he would have been a fool to turn it down.

Esme assured Emmett they'd talk more about the job and get things sorted out that evening before she and Carlisle stood, announcing that they had a few last minutes things they needed to get done before they could bring Edward home and left Emmett to Rosalie as they'd already said all they'd needed to. They were sure she'd have more she'd want to say to him though considering he had called her in the middle of the night to drag him out of a club. Although she'd been willing to collect him, she hadn't been pleased by it and somehow they didn't think she'd just let it slide.

She was exactly the sort of girl he needed, kind hearted yet strong willed and not the type to take any kind of nonsense. They really hoped she'd stay around as they liked her and had no doubt things would be a lot smoother all round if Emmett had someone like her to keep him in line.

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><p>Before Edward could leave the hospital there were a large selection of tests, scans and readings to be taken and by lunch time Edward was grouchy despite Bella's best attempts at distracting him. He'd been poked, prodded and moved around so much that he was tired and sore all over. When Carlisle and Esme finally appeared he couldn't wait to get out of the hospital just so he could be left alone.<p>

Carlisle had to help him dress. He couldn't lift his arms enough to be able to get a t-shirt on without causing far too much pain so he was thankful they'd thought to bring him a button-up shirt but even getting into that was painful. The shorts were even worse. He hadn't realised how awkward the cast would make things but he couldn't really control what little movement he could manage making him clumsy and uncoordinated. He was also disgruntled to realise he'd be stuck wearing shorts while the cast was on as he didn't think he'd be able to get jeans over the top of it. He hoped Esme and Carlisle had good heating in their house.

They did eventually manage to get him dressed and into his wheel chair though and Edward finally started to relax as Carlisle pushed him through the corridors and out to the car where Bella and Esme were already waiting having taken Edward's things out to the car while he was getting dressed.

At first Edward refused the help Carlisle offered to get him from the wheelchair and into the front passenger seat of the car which had been moved as far back as possible to give him room for the cast, determined to do it by himself but a couple of failed attempts forced him to admit defeat. His shoulder just wasn't strong enough to hold his weight as he tried to lift himself out of the chair and the stress of the morning had only made it more painful. After grudgingly accepting Carlisle's help again they had him in the car, the wheel chair collapsed and in the back in minutes and Edward tried to let go of his disgruntled feelings as they pulled away from the car park.

Edward was quiet on the way home. He was feeling oddly nervous of seeing the Cullen's house for the first time. He'd heard a lot about it from Lucy and Bella and while they both seemed to like it he was fairly sure he was going to feel out of place there. It sounded big and impressive, much like his parents' house had been and he just hoped the warmness of the people living there would tone down the imposingness of it. Bella's house was more his level but even that was a little impressive for him. A house with an entertainment room and princess bed just sounded too much and he didn't belong to that kind of world anymore.

Knowing that he was only going to make himself feel worse the more he thought about it he tried to pay attention to Bella and Esme's conversation in the back seat but catching the sound of Emmett's name he wasn't sure he wanted to hear any more of it so he turned his head to look out the window instead, watching the streets fly by and trying to let his mind go blank.

They finally pulled up in front of a house that was larger than his parents' current home and Edward felt sick as he looked at it. It was too big and he longed for the comfort of his little flat. No one else seemed aware of his misgivings as they bustled around, emptying the car and unfolding the wheelchair so Carlisle could help him inside.

If they noticed his quietness on the way in they didn't mention it. They gave him a brief tour of the ground floor which was the only one he'd be able to use for the time being but even that was daunting. The entertainment room was exactly as Bella had described it, right down to the tent made from blankets and cushions that was still in the middle of the room and Lucy's toys that were scattered around. Seeing her favourite doll lying haphazardly on the sofa was the only thing that stopped the panic that was beginning to well up from over powering him.

When they showed him Lucy's room his jaw actually dropped. He'd never seen anything like it before and he was certain Lucy would never want them to move out. It was a little girls dream and put his efforts back at their own flat to shame. He'd never in a million years have been able to provide even a quarter of what the room contained. It was over flowing with toys, the bed was astounding and he could see the new dresses that were spilling out of the pink double wardrobe.

They seemed to take his speechlessness as a good sign and moved on to his own room. He was relieved to see it was a lot more minimal although it was still in a different world entirely to his room at their flat. Everything looked brand new and the heavy dark wood furniture all matched. Some of his own things were scattered around the room and he was pleased to see they hadn't added too many new things to them although he was sure that when he opened his wardrobe or any of the drawers he'd find plenty of new clothes.

He was totally overwhelmed and his tour guides finally seemed to notice as he saw out the corner of his eye Esme and Carlisle say something to Bella quietly before Esme set the bag she was carrying on the bed and they left.

Bella moved round in front of his vision and set the shoe box she'd been carrying beside the bag before she went back to him and leant down, wrapping him in a warm, comforting hug.

He hugged her back, trying to get a handle on his emotions rather than letting them go completely which was surprisingly hard to do, especially when he felt her press a kiss into his hair. The house shouldn't have affected him so much after all it was just a house, a beautiful, expensive house but a house just the same. It was meant to be his home now, he wasn't sure what was happening with his flat but considering the effort that had gone into Lucy's room he felt certain that they intended them to stay long term. He should have been ecstatic to be living somewhere as ostentatious as it was after years of living in less than brilliant conditions but he felt wrong. He was so far out of his comfort zone that he didn't know what to do.

"Talk to me." Bella said as she pulled away and moved to sit on the bed, tugging his chair to face her and letting her hand fall to rest on his knee to maintain contact.

"It's so big." He mumbled unable to articulate exactly what he was feeling. Bella smiled sympathetically and nodded.

"Yeah it is a little imposing but you'll get used to it." She offered watching as Edward continued to look around his room with a strangely blank expression. It was clear he was struggling but there wasn't much that could be done about it as there was nowhere else for him to go. If they'd had the space she would have asked Renee if they could have them stay but there wasn't room and the stairs would have caused a major problem. The Cullen house really was the best place for him, it had plenty of rooms he could access, he needed the medical care that Carlisle could provide and he needed Esme's mothering nature as he'd been starved of that kind of care for far too long. Bella suspected he was already growing to love that side of Esme anyway from the glimpses he'd caught whenever she visited him. If he could just give staying at the house a chance she was sure he'd end up never wanting to leave.

"I miss my flat." He muttered finally looking at her and she could see the thinly veiled panic in his eyes. She got the impression he was only one more lavish room away from an anxiety attack which was something he needed to avoid with his sore ribs and healing lung.

"This place will feel more like home once Lucy's here. You'll see." She suggested and Edward hoped she was right as right then it felt a million miles away from home. Bella must have noticed his doubts as she gently squeezed his knee to get him to look at her again. "It will, she's really comfortable here and you will get used to it."

"I hope so." He responded before letting his attention fall to the shoe box Bella was sitting beside in an attempt to get his mind off the house. In all the chaos of returning memories and hospital tests he'd completely forgotten about it and he couldn't even remember seeing it since the first time he'd looked in it.

"Where was that?" He asked, pointing to it and Bella glanced to her side to see what he was talking about.

"Oh, I hid it in the bottom drawer of that unit that was beside your bed. I wasn't sure if you'd want Lucy to see it and I guess it just got forgotten about with being out of sight." She answered, "Do you want to see it?"

"Not right now." He responded thinking the Cullen house was enough to be dealing with right then without adding the emotions the things inside that box would dredge up. All he'd wanted to know was where it had been and he was glad Bella had thought to keep it from Lucy, her curiosity would have demanded answers and he didn't want to go there yet. He needed to look through it all first and work out just what he'd say to Lucy about Jessica but right then it could wait.

There was a flicker of disappointment on Bella's face as she gave the box one last glance before she settled back to watch him and he was paying enough attention to her to catch it so he knew that when he was ready to look through the contents of the box he'd wait for a moment when she was with him. He had a feeling he'd probably need her there anyway.

"We should probably go find Carlisle and Esme and you've still got to see the kitchen anyway. It's no wonder Esme loves cooking so much, it's is amazing." Bella commented after a moment figuring that if he was going to get used to the house it would be better to get the whole tour over with so there wouldn't be any surprises later when he'd thought he'd come to terms with it.

"Just like the rest of this place then. Do you know what's happening with my flat?" He asked as Bella got to her feet when he voiced no arguments and took control of his chair, pushing him towards the door. The help wasn't unwanted as his arm really was too sore and tired to push himself but he still didn't like the fact he couldn't see her anymore.

"As in is it still yours?" She questioned and he could hear the slight frown in her voice even if he couldn't see it on her face and guessed it wasn't something they'd wanted him to be questioning yet.

"Yeah."

"Well the lease is still yours. I think Carlisle and Esme may have taken over paying the rent while you're here but they didn't want to take the option away from you for when you're well enough to look after yourself again. I do know they'd like you to stay here though and that it wouldn't just be to help you guys out. This house is huge and from the way Esme fusses over everyone whose staying here I'd say she at least finds it a little empty with just the two of them rattling around the place." Bella answered giving Edward a lot to think about. He was glad to know they hadn't just terminated his lease for him, the fact the option to go back was there took a little of the anxiety away even if the idea of going back there did scare him a little. They'd been right to assume he wouldn't feel comfortable in his kitchen anymore but if it came to it he knew he'd be able to get used to it. Still, it was good to know they were actually taking his feelings into account and not just steamrolling ahead with whatever they thought was best for him.

They found Carlisle and Esme in the kitchen, Esme halfway through making a pot of tea. Again the room was just how Bella had described it but as he was already fully overwhelmed Edward tried to focus on the people rather than the glossy marble counters, sparkling top of the range gadgets and the over flowing fridge he caught a glimpse of as Esme retrieved the milk.

Realising his plan had already failed he tried to focus back on the conversation Carlisle and Bella were having but he'd already missed half of it so it didn't make a lot of sense to him and his eyes wandered again allowing him to realise that someone who he would have expected to be there wasn't.

"Where's Emmett?" He blurted before he'd really thought it through and then wished he'd kept quiet as he wasn't sure he actually wanted to know. He wasn't ready to come face to face with him just yet. The fact Carlisle, Esme and Bella were glancing warily between themselves didn't sit well with him but it also added to his curiosity as to where his brother was.

"He took Rosalie out for a late lunch to apologise." Esme finally answered and Edward was aware of everyone's eyes being on him as he thought that through. He couldn't quite work out if he was pleased Emmett was out or not.

"What's he got to apologise for?" He asked deciding to ignore his feelings and just stick to the curiosity.

"He spent most of yesterday drinking and decided it was a good idea to call her at two in the morning to pick him up." Carlisle explained which again Edward wasn't quite sure how to take. It was fairly obvious why Emmett would decide to spend a day drinking. He was just sorry their inability to get along was inconveniencing Rosalie.

"She didn't really mind, she's just teaching him a lesson." Bella commented, correctly guessing the source of Edward's frown. He didn't say anything in response but his face relaxed a little and taking their lead from him the rest of them moved onto to general chit chat, letting him just observe rather than trying to force his participation. It was clear he was a little lost in his own thoughts.

After Esme made sure no one was hungry they eventually moved through to the entertainment room after Edward's insistence that the last thing he wanted to do was go to bed. Instead they helped him onto the sofa where Esme fussed with the cushions trying to help him get comfortable. He was still quiet so once he was settled Carlisle volunteered to go with Esme to collect Lucy leaving Bella and Edward alone.

As soon as they were gone Edward knocked off the cushions Esme had placed under his head and sat up just enough to enable him to tug Bella down into the seat from where she'd been sitting on the arm of the sofa.

She squealed at the sudden slip which made Edward grin as he made himself comfortable using her lap for a pillow instead of the cushions. It was good to see a little of his more playful side so she ruffled his hair and settled down, snatching the remote from where Esme had left it next to him and letting her other arm snake across his chest.

"It's good to be out of hospital." Edward murmured sleepily once Bella had settled on a channel showing one of the cookery shows he had found tolerable on his enforced sick leave from work.

"Good. You ready for Lucy's excitement?" Bella asked, brushing his hair back from his face and looking down at him. The tiredness he'd started to show at the hospital was obviously beginning to take over as his eyes were drooping closed against his will but at least it looked as though the sleepiness was taking away some of his anxiety.

"Hmm she might have to wake me up first." He mumbled as his eyes slid shut and he didn't try to pull them open again.

"I'm sure she'll have no worries about doing that. Listen, do you want me to head home when she gets here?" Bella asked before he could fall asleep on her since that seemed to be his intention.

"What? No!" He responded, his eyes snapping open to look at her with disbelief.

"Ok, I just thought you might want to spend some time alone with her. I know how much you've missed each other." She reasoned, "And I remember how much you wanted to be left alone the last time you got out of hospital."

"Things have changed since then. I want you here with us so long as you want to be here." He responded and seeing her soft smile he let his eyes fall closed again, confident that she wouldn't be going anywhere for the time being.

"I want to, I just wanted to make sure I wasn't getting in the way. I don't ever want to come between the two of you."

"You could never get in the way. Alone with Lucy is good but we've had five years of only that and we both love having you with us. We'll get our alone time when you can't be here." He assured her, "Can I go to sleep now?"

That made her laugh a little but she kissed his cheek before informing him that he could indeed go to sleep and she'd still be there when he woke up then spent the rest of the time it took Carlisle and Esme to return with Lucy just watching him, wondering how on earth she'd managed to get lucky enough that he'd chosen her to let into their lives.

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><p><em>AN - Sorry I missed a week, I started reading the new Black Dagger Brotherhood book and got completely absorbed in it...not a lot else got done at all! I've now run out of new books to read for the time being so hopefully I'll do a little better this week so long as I don't get distracted by something on here, once I start reading something I don't really stop until its finished.<em>

_As always thank you for taking the time to read this story and for the reviews :)_


	46. Chapter 44 Marker Pen Masterpiece

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

_AN - This chapter has been slightly updated for a continuity issue that really bugged me when I was rereading everything in preperation to finish writing this story, it's nothing major and does not affect the plot at all, it just irritated me! Also, if this alerts everyone that I've altered it and you happen to be looking for the end of this story then I'm sorry but it is on it's way. I've finished a rough draft, I'm just making sure I'm happy with it before I post it. It will be up soon!  
><em>

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><p><strong>Chapter 44 – Marker Pen Masterpiece<strong>

Bella looked up when Lucy ran into the room. Her jacket was still half on, trailing along behind her as she unsuccessfully tried to remove her arm from the final sleeve as she moved, there was no sign of her school bag or her shoes so Bella guessed they had been the cause of the thumps she'd heard shortly after the front door had been opened and there was a bright smile on her face. She was obviously very excited to have her daddy back with her but her gaze slowly moved from Edward to Bella as she spotted he was using her as a pillow and she paused when Bella placed a finger to her lips to signal for quiet.

Taking heed of her warning, Lucy stopped long enough to get her jacket off fully, leaving it to land in a pile on the floor before she moved closer. Bella watched her smile dim a little when she reached the sofa and found Edward was indeed fast asleep and then fall completely as her gaze settled on the cast on his leg.

"That's just helping his leg to heal. If you ask nicely once he wakes up he might let you draw him some pictures on it." Bella told her quietly realising quickly that it was probably the first time Lucy had seen the cast as Edward had always been covered by his sheets when she'd visited. With it covering his leg up to mid thigh to ensure there was no movement in his knee while it healed it looked bad and no doubt scary to a worried five year old.

"He's ok?" Lucy questioned hopefully, looking back to Bella and her smile returned when Bella nodded and smiled softly back at her.

"Yup, he's just a little tired from all the moving around earlier so we're going to let him nap a while longer." She explained which Lucy seemed to accept as she went back to looking her dad over carefully. Bella followed her gaze and saw what she was seeing that was making her smile grow again. He did look a lot better than he had under the harsh lighting of the hospital. There was more colour to his complexion and it was helping to reduce the impact of the dark circles beneath his eyes. The yellowing of the bruises wasn't even so noticeable anymore and the scratches and cuts had lost a lot of their redness. His face was still a little gaunt from the weight he'd lost but Bella knew that would soon be replaced once Esme started feeding him. With the sling gone and the way he was resting comfortably in Bella's lap it would have been easy to forget anything had been wrong with him if it wasn't for the cast.

"Will he be awake for dinner?" Lucy asked, bringing Bella out of her thoughts. She'd got her head tilted to one side as she studied Edward with a calculating look making Bella slightly suspicious.

"If he's not, we'll be waking him. We're not to let him get away with skipping meals." She answered a little warily and her suspicions that Lucy was plotting something deepened when her face lit up in a large grin.

"Ok. I'm going to find Esme. You stay with Daddy." She stated before she spun around and dashed out of the room giving Bella no opportunity to question her on her plans as she only briefly stopped just long enough to pick up her jacket after she stepped on it. Knowing that she couldn't be up to anything too mischievous if she was roping Esme into her plans, Bella just watched her go with bemusement. It was starting to become clear that there would never be any dull moments hanging out with Lucy and Edward.

Lucy headed straight for the kitchen and found Esme was already there which suited her perfectly as it was exactly where she'd wanted her to be.

"Esme, can we bake Daddy a cake?" She asked, startling Esme who had her back to the doorway looking through one of the cupboards and hadn't heard her come in.

"Of course we can but wouldn't you rather be spending time with him?" She questioned as she turned around to face Lucy and found she was climbing up onto one of the stools at the breakfast bar. That view did nothing to calm her already startled heart as she was still having a hard time getting used to just how capable and independent Lucy could be. The stools were high but after the first couple of days staying with them Lucy had been adamant she could get onto them by herself and had proved to be right. That knowledge however didn't stop Esme from wanting to help her and gravitating towards her as the stool wobbled.

"He's asleep on Bella. Can we make him my special cake?" Lucy answered once she was finally seated and totally unaware of the scare she'd given Esme or the way she'd been hovering, anxious that she was going to topple the stool rather than make it safely onto it.

"I don't think we'll have the recipe for that here. Do you know what kind of cake it is and what makes it special?" Esme asked feeling a lot better now that Lucy was stationary although a little worried she was going to have to disappoint her. They hadn't packed anything that had resembled recipe books from their flat and the only papers Carlisle had looked for had been the ones to do with Edward's bank, rent and bills. Everything else had been left with the intention of going back if and when Edward needed anything.

"It's a Victoria sponge cake and it needs sprinkles!" Lucy told her excitedly, "I know what goes into it and how to make it."

"Ok then, tell me what you need and I'll get the ingredients out for you." Esme offered glad that it sounded like a basic cake they ought to have no problems recreating without a recipe. A Victoria sponge was one of the first cakes she'd learnt to bake and they certainly wouldn't need the recipe for it as she knew it by heart but even if she hadn't it turned out it wouldn't have mattered as she was surprised when Lucy listed the ingredients without missing anything out and then proceeded to ask for a set of scales as she told Esme the amounts she needed. Even without help Lucy had all the weights correct.

Esme was even more taken aback as she watched Lucy weigh the butter and sugar carefully before she handed her the bowl and asked her to mix them for her. It really did seem a recipe would have been totally redundant as Lucy took the creamed mixture back and carefully added one egg and half the flour, making sure it was all mixed in before adding the final egg and flour.

"You're a very impressive cake maker. I think we'll have to find some other things to bake together while you're here. Would you like that?" Esme asked as she greased and lined the cake tins for her. Lucy nodded enthusiastically but was too enthralled with tipping the hundreds and thousands into the mix to answer.

"Making Lucy cake?"

Emmett's voice startled both of them and they looked up to find him standing in the doorway with Rosalie beside him. Lucy jumped down from her stool so she could run over and hug him and confirmed that they were indeed making her cake and Esme watched on as Emmett smiled and ruffled her hair.

"You know of this cake?" She asked intrigued as she poured the mix into the tins so they could get them into the oven.

"Oh yeah, it's miracle cake. She suggested we make it for Edward one of the days he was really suffering from the nightmares and lack of sleep. It cheered him right up." He explained wondering if it would have the same effect this time although he knew he had to listen to what they'd all told him that morning and keep his distance for the time being. They'd peeked in on him and Bella as they passed the entertainment room and she'd assured him that he was doing well and was glad to be home which would just have to be enough for him right now.

Lucy beamed at his confirmation of the cakes special powers and informed Esme it would take twenty minutes to bake before she turned her attention back to Emmett and asked him where he'd been. Luckily Rosalie saved him from his floundering of trying to work out a child friendly version of his expedition into binge drinking and resultant apology attempts by telling her Emmett had been hanging out with her. That seemed to be a suitable answer as all Lucy questioned was why he hadn't answered his phone when Esme had called him but they quickly explained that away by saying the battery had died.

Her curiosity apparently settled Lucy announced she was going to go and talk to Bella while the cake baked then skipped out of the room. Emmett watched her go while Rosalie rounded the breakfast bench to peer at the cakes as they sat in the oven.

"She made those from memory. Didn't really need my help at all." Esme commented, still in awe.

"I'm impressed. I doubt I could do it even with a recipe." Rosalie replied as Emmett joined them.

"She told me they used to make these cakes a lot."

"Even so, to remember the recipe and the weights at her age, that's amazing." Esme continued thoughtfully.

"She takes after Edward. When he was little you only had to show him how to do something once and he could do it perfectly every time afterwards by himself. At school he was always top of anything academic and he was a musical genius with the piano." Emmett shrugged, "To be honest it was kind of annoying when we were kids, all I could beat him at was sports. Lucy's the same as him though, have you noticed how fast she can do her homework? She barely ever asks for help either unless it's reading and even that she seems to be improving rapidly with lately. When she talks about school it's all about how many gold stars she's had, there's never anything negative."

"I guess you're right with that. I hadn't really thought about it before." Esme mused as she realised what Emmett was saying was true and it settled a few worries for her. It was good to know that Lucy was independent not just because she'd had to be to help Edward when he needed it but because she was naturally inclined to be as it was already bad enough knowing how fast Edward had had to grow up without thinking about the same being true for her.

"I didn't know Edward played piano. I'm surprised Bella hasn't mentioned it, he's all she talks about these days and that's pretty noteworthy." Rosalie commented, taking a seat and accepting the offer of tea with a nod as Esme picked the kettle up and looked at them expectantly.

"Well I doubt he's had many opportunities to play recently. He probably hasn't mentioned it or if he has he probably tried to avoid talking about it. There are a lot of things he used to be into that he never speaks about now." Emmett answered, taking up the seat next to Rosalie's.

"Did he enjoy the piano?" Esme asked with interest, turning to lean against the counter facing them now that the kettle was turned on.

"Yeah, I think so anyway, he certainly spent most of his spare time practising. He was really good at it." He replied watching as Esme thought about something.

"Do you know if Alice is having Jasper round tonight?" She asked confusing Emmett a little with the sudden change in topic but he nodded anyway, wondering why she was asking.

"I should think so. She'll take any excuse she can to spend time with him and I know he's been wanting to see how Edward is doing."

"Good, I might need you boys to give me a hand with something later on then." She commented vaguely.

"Sure, what do you need doing?" Emmett questioned but Esme just waved him off.

"I might need something heavy moving, Carlisle will have to help too." She responded, turning back to the kettle to finish making the tea, "Now are you staying for dinner Rosalie? We're having beef stir fry"

"If it's not too much trouble that sounds really good."

"It's no trouble at all. Tell me more about this lunch date, where did he take you?" Esme responded making Emmett grumble while Rosalie answered and they dissolved into a conversation all about his dating techniques like he wasn't even still in the room with them.

* * *

><p>The evening did not go at all like Edward had expected and he couldn't have been more thankful.<p>

He'd woken up to find Lucy sitting on the floor with her dolls while she chatted happily to Bella who was absentmindedly playing with his hair. As soon as they'd realised he was awake their conversation had stopped and Lucy had squeezed onto the sofa along with them, burrowing herself into his arms and he'd been more than happy to put up with the pain in his shoulder to hold her.

It was good just being together and the way Lucy chattered to him a mile a minute made warmth spread through his chest as it showed how excited she was to have him there with her. He found it hard to keep up but she didn't seem to mind and when he lost track and didn't know what response she was looking for Bella was there to provide it.

He could have happily stayed there, just like that with the pair of them all night but Lucy ran off with Esme for half an hour before dinner and Edward couldn't be too upset about her deserting him as he suspected it had something to do with the faint smell of cake that drifted through from the corridor every time someone opened the door and he still had Bella with him.

Jasper and Alice chose that moment to stop in and say hello anyway and while he was a little disgruntled at the interruption to the little bubble he'd had with just Lucy and Bella they only stayed long enough to ask how he was feeling and for Jasper to talk to Bella about college work before they left again so he didn't have chance to start feeling too uncomfortable with the extra company.

When Lucy returned she had Esme and Carlisle in tow, each carry a plate of food and cutlery. Esme handed the one she'd been carrying to Bella who moved to join Lucy on the floor as she'd pulled her tent apart earlier and had scattered the cushions close to the sofa, allowing Edward to push himself up to sit, leant against the arm of the chair. He accepted the lap tray Esme had produced from down the side of the sofa before Carlisle set the plate he'd been carrying down on it. They'd left again then and Edward had been pleasantly surprised that no one had been expecting him to join in the family dinner they could faintly hear going on in the kitchen. He wasn't ready to be surrounded by so many people at once especially as he could clearly hear Emmett's voice in the mix so Edward was a lot more comfortable with the much smaller dinner they had going on in the entertainment room.

It was exactly the kind of quiet evening Edward had needed for his first night in a new house. Lucy and Bella made him feel at home despite his earlier anxiety and it was good not to have to say goodbye to Lucy after only a couple of hours. Instead he got to help her with her reading homework, being impressed by how smoothly it went and he got to watch her and Bella play together. It did make him wish he could join in but being there to see it allowed him to still be a part of their game and he enjoyed it especially as Lucy kept taking a moment out to climb up, hug him and kiss his cheek before rejoining Bella.

The Lucy cake which Esme appeared with just about made his evening perfect. Lucy was so proud of it and he loved watching her beam as he and Bella commented on how good it was. She was so happy which was exactly how she was meant to be and he loved seeing it. Bella had been right; all it had taken to make the Cullen house feel like home was Lucy although her own presence had certainly helped as well. He had a feeling he'd feel at home anywhere so long as they were with him.

Carlisle and Esme returned after everything had been cleaned and put away in the kitchen and though Edward could feel Carlisle's eyes on him every so often Esme seemed distracted by the room as she paid more attention to various pieces of furniture than anyone in the room. Edward and Bella shared a few confused glances as she strolled around the room, looking critically from the sofa and chairs to the pool table and then the room in general but Carlisle didn't seem to find it unusual as he showed no reaction to her strange behaviour at all.

Edward's nap had done him well so he was still awake when Lucy abandoned her dolls and climbed up onto the sofa in search of a cuddle that Edward was happy to provide. Bella looked up from her spot on the floor and smiled softly at them, loving how content they looked. Unfortunately though it was getting late and she needed to go home. However much she wanted to stay exactly where she was she didn't want to outstay her welcome and from the way Carlisle was watching Edward she was pretty sure it was bed time for more than just Lucy.

"I should get going." She announced, getting to her feet and moving over so she could lean down and quickly kiss Edward when he tipped his head back to see her. When she pulled away he was pouting at her.

"Do you have to?" He asked, pulling out the big sad eyes and catching on quickly to what he was doing Lucy shuffled a little so she could look up at her with the matching expression.

"Now that's just not fair!" Bella complained lightly, unable to hide her smile. Any other night they probably would have won but with Esme and Carlisle there it helped remind her that she didn't want to outstay her welcome, "I really do, you guys need to sleep anyway so you won't miss me. I'll come round again tomorrow."

"We will miss you." Edward grumbled but he eased up and smiled a little, "Thanks for being here today."

"You are more than welcome. I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else." She responded before leaning down for one last kiss. It didn't even bother her that Carlisle and Esme were both in the room or that Lucy was watching as it was quickly becoming just a natural habit that felt far too good to try and stop. Even so she kept it chaste and quickly moved on to press a kiss to Lucy's forehead before she straightened and reluctantly stepped back.

"I'll see you both tomorrow." She repeated and then after a brief goodbye to Carlisle and Esme she was gone so Edward took her comment about them needing sleep to heart and suggested it was bedtime for him and Lucy. Carlisle eagerly agreed it was a good idea and while Esme took Lucy off to get her ready for bed, he helped Edward do the same.

Nobody was at all surprised when only minutes after Esme had finished tucking Lucy into her own bed, the tell tale creak of her bedroom door opening sounded followed, shortly by the same noise just one door further down the corridor. Esme and Carlisle gave them ten minutes before they crept over to check on them, Carlisle needing to make sure she wasn't going to end up hurting him and they were both relieved to peek in and see them carefully curled up together. Edward's shoulder would no doubt be aching in the morning from the way his arm was stretched out around Lucy but she wasn't lying on his chest so they left them to it knowing they'd both sleep better for it.

* * *

><p>When Bella returned midway through the following morning it was Carlisle who answered the door and she found Edward was fast asleep stretched out on the sofa again while Lucy was drawing pictures onto a large stack of coloured paper on the floor.<p>

"He'll be out for a while I'm afraid, I had to give him an extra dose of pain relief this morning." Carlisle explained after offering her a coffee and leading her through to the kitchen once she'd said hello to Lucy.

"Is he ok?" She asked worriedly as she accepted the coffee mug from him.

"Yeah, he's fine. Lucy climbed into his bed last night and he slept holding her against him. With his shoulder already upset from all the moving yesterday it just got a little too much. Once he wakes up I'm sure he'll feel better. On the plus side they both slept well." He answered and he caught the brief grimace that crossed Bella's face before it settled into a smile.

"That's good. He's been having some pretty scary nightmares."

"I hear he's not the only one." Carlisle commented and from the way her smile instantly disappeared he knew he'd interpreted her earlier expression correctly. The tiredness in her eyes also helped confirm it.

"Yeah, I've been meaning to talk to you about that." She admitted, cupping her hands around her mug as she stared into it, unsure of what to say.

"Are you still having trouble sleeping?" He asked so she nodded, bringing her gaze back up to his.

"It's the same dream every time and I can't get back to sleep until I've seen him. It was a little better last night I guess, I did get a few hours sleep before I woke up."

"Talking to someone's probably the best idea. There's pills that will help you sleep but they won't fix the anxiety that's causing the nightmares."

"I know, I was hoping you'd be able to suggest someone. I wouldn't know where to start with trying to find a good therapist."

"Well I don't know any personally but I can get some recommendations and set up an appointment for you if you want." Carlisle volunteered as he knew it could be a daunting prospect and one that was easily put off. He was glad she was asking for his help.

"That would be really good, thank you."

"It's no trouble, though if you could mention it to Edward I'd be grateful. I know how little he likes talking about things which is why I haven't brought it up with him yet but it really could help him. Maybe seeing you getting the benefit from it will make him a little more open to the idea."

"I think he's already open to it, just not quite ready but I'll let him know I'm doing it and how it goes." Bella offered as after their talk the morning before she knew Edward was starting to understand that talking about things could help. Even so, she thought Carlisle was right not to push it and she was glad Edward seemed to be in such good hands at the Cullen house. That thought made her wonder why she hadn't seen Esme yet though which seemed unusual.

"Where's Esme? I thought she'd be loving having Edward here to fuss over."

"Oh she is but since I'm off work for the next few days she's taking the opportunity to get Emmett settled at her office. He's going to be taking on some of the admin work to free up more time for her here." Carlisle answered.

"Nice, you guys really understand Edward more than he gives you credit for." Bella commented, happy to know that they were clued in to the fact the brothers needed to stay out of each other's way for the time being. She had suspected as much the previous night when they'd been left pretty much on their own but it was good to get confirmation of it and it just cemented her belief that Edward was in good hands. It made it easier to assure him he was in the right place.

"What do you mean?" Carlisle asked curiously knowing that Bella had a much deeper insight into Edward's feelings on things.

"He was worried that Emmett wouldn't leave him alone once he came home. Getting him out of the house like that is perfect." She responded making Carlisle frown a little.

"It's not a permanent solution. They're going to have to sort things out at some point." He murmured.

"I know and so does Edward. We talked about it a little yesterday and he just needs time to get it sorted out in his own head. He wants Emmett in his life but from what he said yesterday, he never dealt with his feelings when he was thrown out. He just shoved it all aside and put everything he had into focusing on Lucy. Now everything's been dragged up and out in the open he doesn't know what to make of it."

"I guess that's something then. I'm glad to hear he's talking about it to you at least."

"They'll get there. Edward does know Emmett means well. There's nothing any of us can do now except wait for him to sort the rest of it out for himself." Bella concluded as the pull to go and sit with Edward was growing too strong, "Do you mind if I play with Luce for a little while? I've got some coloured marker pens for her."

"Is Edward going to regret this?" Carlisle asked with a smile guessing what Bella was thinking of using as the drawing surface.

"Nah, I've seen him proudly wearing a squint plaster right in the middle of his forehead with a yellow duck on the middle of it because Lucy put it there. He's going to love it." Bella answered confidently making Carlisle laugh as she drained her coffee mug and stood.

"Go ahead then, but if he asks, I knew nothing about it!"

* * *

><p>Lucy was giggling.<p>

Edward would recognise that glorious sound anywhere, even through the haze of his drug induced sleep.

"Shh...you'll wake him up and we're not finished yet." Bella quietly but unsuccessfully hushed her as she giggled again making Edward wonder what she was up to.

"I'm already awake by the way." He announced groggily and he pulled his heavy eyes open to find both Lucy and Bella staring up at him in surprise from where they were knelt on the floor. Both of them had a colourful marker pen in hand, and a guilt tinted mischievous smile on their face. The splashes of colour that were smudged on their faces did nothing to hide what they'd been up to.

Pushing himself up to be sitting against the arm of the sofa Edward's gaze dropped back to the pens in their hands before it drifted over to his own leg. The once clean, white cast was now covered in drawings of little, brightly coloured ducks.

"The design was Lucy's idea." Bella commented as he continued to stare at it. He suspected Bella had drawn the outlines and Lucy had coloured them in as the shapes were far too neat and orderly for Lucy alone.

"Bella bought the pens." Lucy added and he finally looked back up to see a little of the mischief had turned to apprehension as they watched him.

"I like it." He told them bringing their smiles back before Lucy climbed up beside him and wrapped her arms around his neck in a hug. Returning her hug with one arm he kissed her head before looking back at Bella and realising the yellow smudge on her cheek was actually a messily drawn duck.

"I hope this stuff washes off skin." He commented with a grin as he pointed towards her cheek.

"It should, I got them out of Mum's school supplies." She answered happily as she put the cap back on the pen she'd been using and got to her feet. "How are you feeling? Carlisle said you'd needed stronger pain meds this morning."

"I'm fine, my shoulder was just a little sore from sleeping on it wrong. Where is he anyway?" Edward replied as Bella moved to sit on the arm on his sofa where he could tip his head back to rest against her leg. She ran a hand into his hair automatically and he closed his eyes and tilted his head into her touch.

"He's around somewhere. I think he wanted to maintain total ignorance to what me and Luce were doing in case you didn't approve when you woke up."

"He's silly, Daddy always likes my pictures." Lucy commented, lifting her head up so she could see Bella too.

"Of course I do sweetheart." Edward agreed, ruffling her hair briefly before she struggled out of his grip and jumped down to reclaim her pen from where she'd dropped it on the floor in her haste to get a hug.

"See I knew that. Plus the cast was just far too plain, they've got to be drawn on." Bella commented as Lucy returned to colouring in the last few ducks Bella had drawn. It really was quite good, Lucy had done well staying within the lines.

"That sounds like its coming from experience." Edward mused, flicking his gaze back to Bella.

"Yup, I've had more than my fair share of casts. I was a seriously clumsy child. I'm not much better now either really. Can't say I've ever had a cast quite as big as yours those, I usually settled for just the one break at a time."

"I bet none of them had such colourful ducks all over them either." Edward commented lightly and Bella loved the cheerfulness in his voice.

"No, they usually just had people's names scribbled over them messily. Got to say, I'm rather jealous."

"And so you should be, it's awesome. What made you choose ducks Lucy?" Edward asked jerking her attention back to him and she looked a little startled for a moment before she shrugged and went back to concentrating on the duck she was colouring.

"I like ducks and the one on the plaster made your head better." She commented making Bella think she was just far too cute.

"And that's how I knew you wouldn't mind. That plaster on your forehead the first day we spoke said it all." She commented quietly to him and if he'd been able to reach her he'd have pulled her down for a kiss but the angle was all wrong so instead he had to settle for letting her know through words just how much it meant to him that she understood him so easily.

"I love you, so much."

She looked at him a little amused before she leant down to kiss him lightly.

"I love you too." She murmured just before Lucy interrupted them.

"It's finished!" She announced proudly and they both peered over at Edward's leg where Lucy was grinning as she admired their handy work.

"You need to sign it Luce." Bella instructed and Lucy looked for the black pen Bella had been using to draw the outlines before she very carefully wrote her name in one of the yellow ducks that was placed at the centre of his shin.

"You should sign it too." She stated once she was done, holding the pen out towards Bella so after glancing at Edward's still apparent smile she took it and slid down from her seat to kneel on the floor beside Lucy. Following her lead, Bella wrote her name inside one of the ducks, picking a purple one near Lucy's.

"We should take a picture of this." Bella mused as she sat back on the floor and pulled Lucy into her lap, lightly tickling her sides as she did making her giggle loudly and squirm out of her grip.

"Get Carlisle to do it so we can all be in it." Edward suggested as he watched Lucy pick up another pen and sneak back over to Bella's side. Bella showed no reaction at all as Lucy started to draw on her bare arm and since Bella had assured him they washed off he didn't bother warning her off, not wanting to spoil the game they'd obviously been playing as he could see more smudges of colour on her other arm and looking more closely at Lucy showed the unmistakable shape of a red duck on the back of her hand. Plus he was intrigued to see what Bella would do in retaliation.

As soon as Lucy lifted the pen away from her skin Bella pounced. She got an arm around Lucy's middle and tumbled her over, quickly following so she could tickle her again.

Lucy's squeals and giggles as she tried to get Bella to stop were loud enough to draw Carlisle out of the study to investigate and by the time he reached them Lucy had successfully squirmed out of Bella's grasp and was claiming sanctuary in Edward's arms as she tried to get her breath back.

"What's been going on in here? I could hear you all the way upstairs." Carlisle commented with amusement as he looked between them all, noting how happy and content Edward was looking. Whatever it was they'd been doing he hoped it would continue.

"Bella was just tickling Lucy since Lucy decided it was a good idea to draw on her." Edward explained while Lucy scowled at him for telling on them. He just tapped her nose and grinned at her. She tried to resist it but a smile broke through her scowl.

"I thought those pens were for Edward's cast." Carlisle said as he watched them, smiling fondly at the obvious affection being displayed.

"And I thought you knew nothing about them." Bella commented but Carlisle just shook his head as he looked to her and was unable to hide the amusement he found in the messily drawn ducks she was covered in. She narrowed her eyes at him as she spotted what had caught his attention, warning him not to laugh. She knew she looked a state but it had made Lucy happy and she was no longer glancing at Edward's cast with fear so it was well worth it.

"Well it seems he approved so it doesn't matter what I did or didn't claim to know about."

"They did a good job, it looks much better now. We were going to ask if you could take a photo of it actually." Edward stated so Bella moved over to where she'd left her bag and rummaged through it, pulling out her camera. Edward beckoned her back over to her spot on the arm of the sofa after Carlisle had taken the camera from her and then Lucy climbed up to sit beside Edward.

As Carlisle took several photos Bella's attention got caught by the large new object that sat where the pool table had been before with a white dust sheet over it. She hadn't noticed it before as she'd been too wrapped up in Edward and Lucy to pay much attention to anything else and it was somewhat hidden behind the back of the sofa.

"Hey, Carlisle? What's that?" She asked as he handed the camera back to her and he looked distractedly over to it before he quickly glanced to Edward.

"It's Esme's father's piano. Last night she decided it needed a change of scenery. She's arranged for someone to come in and tune it on Monday."

"Does she play?" Edward asked quietly and when Bella glanced at him he looked slightly troubled which reminded her that he'd once mentioned playing the piano. He hadn't said much about it and had seemed eager to get away from the topic at the time.

"She used to but she's been so busy with the move and getting her business set up over here that she hasn't really played for a while." Carlisle answered also picking up on Edward's unease and deciding not to mention the reason why she'd suddenly wanted the piano moved from their study upstairs.

"Can I see it?" Lucy asked eagerly having already moved to be standing on the sofa, her arms resting on the back of it to keep her balance as she peered at the sheeted object. Carlisle didn't answer but he did walk over and pull the sheet back, revealing a very glossy black grand piano.

"That's like the one I used to have." Edward murmured and although he'd said it quietly Lucy still caught it and her attention snapped to him.

"You had one?" She asked and Edward sighed but nodded anyway and Lucy looked back to the piano with excitement. "Can you play it?"

"I used to be able to but I haven't played for a long time Luce." He answered, trying to tug her back down to sit but she was too enamoured by the piano to let go off the back of the sofa.

"Can I learn?" She asked and though that seemed to take Edward by surprise he still didn't look exactly happy so deciding distraction was the best way to get out of the hole they all seemed to digging Carlisle pulled the sheet back into place.

"How about you help me make lunch Lucy? I'm hopeless in the kitchen." He offered and given Lucy's level of excitement throughout the morning she was easily swayed, her previous question forgotten as she jumped down to take Carlisle's hand and drag him towards the kitchen. She'd never turn down an opportunity to help cook.

"Sorry, that was rather awkward wasn't it?" Bella said as soon as they'd left the room but Edward reached up to take her hand, pulling it down and holding it over his chest as he shook his head trying to let her know it was ok.

"No, I was being stupid." He sighed, "It's just a piano."

"But it bothers you?"

"Yes, although I don't know why." He answered sadly, "When I was in school it was the only thing I really cared about."

"So it's a reminder of the past you've done your best to shove aside and ignore?" Bella correctly guessed and Edward tilted his head to rest against her arm seeking more contact. He hated feeling so out of sorts all the time. They'd just been having fun and he'd managed to ruin it all by dragging the mood down all because of something that reminded him of another life he'd thought was over, never to come back again.

"Yeah, I guess so. Emmett or Alice must have been talking to Esme. Seems a bit of a coincidence that she decided to move the piano in here after I move in."

"Well if it was something you loved she probably thought it would be a good distraction for you while you're stuck inside. They're not forcing you to play, it's just there in case you want to. We already know you have a very low tolerance for day time TV shows and Carlisle doesn't want you going outside for a while yet in case of infections so you're going to get pretty bored stuck in here."

"You're right, again. I wish I didn't react like this to things. It's a really nice, thoughtful gesture and it would be fun to try and teach Lucy. It really shouldn't bother me."

"It's really not surprising you're hesitant with things. I mean it's got to feel a little like two entirely different worlds colliding. That's unsettling at best." Bella mused and Edward just stared at her. He had no idea how she managed to get how he was feeling exactly right. She always just seemed to know yet where he was drowning in confusion over it all she seemed to be able to make perfect sense of it.

Eventually she noticed him staring, "What?"

"You always know exactly what I'm feeling. How do you do that when half the time I can't even make sense of it?"

"I'm just observant and more than a little obsessed with you." Bella joked trying to lighten the mood again and succeeding as Edward's smile came back to life.

"Should I be worried about that obsession?"

"Nah, it's too late for that. We're already past the stalking stage, there's no getting rid of me now so you may as well just accept it. You're stuck with me."

"Guess it's a good job I like you then."

"Yes, yes it is." Bella responded and then leaned over for a rather awkward upside down kiss which Edward had to pull out of when something pulled in his shoulder.

"Get down here, there's plenty of room while Lucy's otherwise occupied." He said, shuffling over as far as he could to give Bella space to slide onto the sofa beside him, thankful Esme spared no expense when purchasing furniture as it was big enough to give them enough room to lie side by side.

Bella did as she was told and found she was just as happy as Lucy was that Edward had regained the ability to hug properly. It felt really good to be held by him again and although she was still careful not to let any of her weight rest on him she could still nuzzle into his neck where she found the horrible, sterile scent of the hospital had finally gone and all she could smell was Edward. She sighed happily and snuggled in a little more before Edward tapped her shoulder and she looked up and got caught in his eyes. They were smouldering, looking at her with a mixture of intense affection and longing and there was nothing she could do but be drawn in by them.

They were so caught up in each other that they didn't even hear Lucy return until she called out to Carlisle.

"I don't think they care what we make. They're kissing again! Can we have cake?"

* * *

><p>Much to Lucy's disappointment Carlisle knew better than to let her have cake for her lunch. For one, Esme would have yelled at him once she found out and for another, they didn't even have chance to get into the cake tin before Bella appeared. Her blush was still evident but she did her best to ignore her embarrassment and helped them find everything they needed for sandwiches and soup.<p>

After lunch Alice and Jasper appeared and on seeing Edward's newly decorated cast they asked to sign it too. Slightly baffled as to the sudden interest in the annoying thing Edward just shrugged and told them to go ahead and seeing what was going on Carlisle joined in as well, all of them signing their name inside a different duck, spanning out from the one Lucy chose.

Edward had to reluctantly give Bella up for a while as Jasper helped her get through some college work and while he was half watching them, worrying that Bella had dropped behind because of him Lucy and Alice offered a distraction in the form of Lucy easily talking her into taking her to the park to see the ducks. It was quite something to watch Alice give in to someone else as it always used to be her who had everyone wrapped around her little finger. To see Lucy do the exact same thing to her made him oddly proud even though he really shouldn't have been letting her get away with coercing people into things. Still, he could well remember the years of being twisted to Alice's every whim and he couldn't bring himself to stop Lucy giving her a taste of her own behaviour. He knew she was only doing it because of the novelty of knowing she could anyway considering she never normally pestered for anything when it was just him.

When Esme and Emmett returned they were all still in the entertainment room. Jasper and Bella were sitting to one side, heads bent over his laptop as they workedon a group assignment while Alice entertained Lucy with her dolls on the floor by Edward's sofa and Carlisle sat in a chair reading a medical journal. As Esme stepped in to say hello, Alice wasn't quite quick enough in distracting Lucy before she spotted Emmett hovering behind Esme.

Unaware of the distance everyone was trying to keep between Edward and Emmett, Lucy ran straight to Emmett for a hug before she grabbed his hand and told him he had to sign Edward's cast just like everyone else. Knowing that upsetting Lucy was definitely not going to help get him back in Edward's good books Emmett was left with little option than to let Lucy drag him across the room but as she let go of his hand to search out the black marker pen he looked warily to Edward hoping for some indication of what he wanted him to do. The brief nod of his head as Lucy pressed the pen into Emmett's hand was enough for him to assume it was ok even if it was just for Lucy's sake so he quickly scribbled his name into one of the ducks before handing the pen off to Esme who Lucy had also commandeered before he retreated back to the doorway.

The awkward moment passed as Lucy asked them a barrage of questions about their day and Emmett was somewhat cheered to find that while Edward wasn't talking to him, he didn't seem to altogether mind his proximity and he hoped it was a sign things could be sorted out between them eventually.

Dinner ended up being a lot noisier than the night before. Garrett dropped in, fulfilling his promise to visit once Edward was home and out of all the family members filling the house he was the one Edward was most comfortable with so when Esme invited him to stay for dinner and he'd accepted Edward had been keen for them all to eat together. It had been a little awkward but they'd eventually managed to get everyone settled to eat where they were as it was more comfortable for Edward to stay where he was than to try and join them at the dining room table.

Most of the talk was about Garrett's shop. Having been away from work for so long Edward was curious to know how everyone was there. Before everything had happened, his life had revolved solely around Lucy and work and it felt like he'd been missing a lot of both of them and while being back with Lucy settled him, hearing about the day to day happenings in the shop helped as well and it definitely relaxed him a little more to hear that Garrett had had no problems replacing the shop window which he could remember being the reason Garrett had left his flat the afternoon of the attack. He was also pleased to hear that while they couldn't prove for sure that it hadn't just been an accident, the CCTV footage from the front of the shop had shown Victoria and Riley to have been in the area at the time. It wasn't a hundred percent proof, but it would help to back Riley's story a little and the more coincidences like that that could be found, the more likely it was that his story would be believed.

By the time Garrett was saying good bye after Lucy had got him to sign Edward's cast, Edward was feeling a lot more positive than he usually did. It may have just been the effect of the painkillers Carlisle kept feeding him but with the constant concern of James starting to seem a little less daunting and his anxiety about moving into the Cullen house being pretty much eliminated thanks to Lucy and Bella's company and Esme and Carlisle thoughtfulness, sitting around a busy room surrounded by friends and family was actually starting to feel a little like things were getting back to normal.

It wasn't his normal, not by a long way, and it wasn't the normal he'd been used to at his parent's either. Instead it was an odd cross between the two where the best parts of each existence were merging together and the worst parts were fading away. It was such a different dynamic to anything he'd known before but it felt like family life how it was always meant to be.

Bella and Jasper left shortly after Garrett, Jasper offering to give her lift home and Emmett and Alice retreated to their rooms as once Bella was gone it was easy to see Edward was starting to tire and was happier just cuddling Lucy than trying to keep up with the conversations going on around him. Carlisle and Esme remained though and settled down to watch TV with him and a very sleepy Lucy who was finally tired out after all her earlier hyperactivity. They were quiet, leaving them in piece while still being around to keep a watchful eye and Edward found he didn't mind. With Esme and Carlisle it didn't feel like he was being babysat the way it had when Emmett had been looking after him. Instead of it annoying him he was actually starting to like the feeling of being looked after and when he looked down to his leg and read all the names that had been written on the cast he realised why he was feeling that way.

He had an aunt and uncle who wanted to take care of him and treated them better than his parent's ever had, a brother and sister who no matter how much they annoyed each other had chosen to stand with him, friends who cared enough to help him even after he'd done his best to push them away, a daughter he loved with everything in him and a girlfriend who meant the world to him and loved him despite his many short comings.

It was a far cry from the lonely existence he'd been living before and in a way he was actually thankful for some of the trouble James had caused. For all the pain, fear and worry they'd been though it had given him something he'd only ever dreamed he'd have again – a family.


	47. Chapter 45  Parents Evening

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 45 – Parents Evening<strong>

Wednesday dawned with Edward feeling restless and disgruntled. He hadn't seen Bella since she'd left Saturday evening and though they'd been talking on the phone it just wasn't the same. The annoyance that caused just made him feel worse as it wasn't her fault she'd had to stay away. After talking to Jasper and going through some of the things she'd missed while sitting with him in the hospital she'd realised she'd missed more than she'd thought and to catch up she was having to spend every available spare minute reading through notes and working on assignments. She had offered to visit in the evenings anyway but already feeling guilty that she'd missed the work in the first place he'd convinced her to do what she had to catch up especially as she was taking the evening out to go to Lucy's parents evening.

That was another cause for his bad mood. He wanted to go. He knew Carlisle had his reasons for wanting him to stay home but he didn't feel bad enough to warrant it. Physically he was doing ok, the medication kept the pain at a bearable level, he'd been doing his physiotherapy exercises for his shoulder which had started to make it feel a little better and with Lucy's nightly visits he was even sleeping fairly well. Unfortunately none of that mattered as it was his immune system that Carlisle was worried about. The removal of his spleen had depleted its effectiveness and with the injury to his lung on top of the recent pneumonia he didn't want Edward unnecessarily exposed to any form of infection that could allow it to flare up again. That meant he was stuck inside until his lungs were stronger and he'd gained enough weight. With the meals Esme was providing three times a day Edward was sure the weight gain wouldn't take long but he knew his lungs would take longer. Even the small amount of exertion it took to get himself in and out of his wheelchair or to push himself a short distance made him out of breath. It wasn't a big deal normally as he was used to it but he didn't like it, especially not when it resulted in him letting Lucy down.

Lucy didn't seem to share his concerns anymore though as she was excited to be taking Bella. She would be going to their house straight from school to play with Anna and make things easier for Bella who would then take her back to the school to speak to her teacher before driving her home. Edward was hoping she'd be able to stay a little while too as although he wanted to hear what Lucy's teacher had to say he just really wanted to see her. He'd missed her.

The parents evening itself was another point of tension for Edward. Although Lucy only ever seemed to have good things to say about school he couldn't help worrying about what her teacher could have noticed. She'd missed several days of school in the last term due to illness and his own injuries and he knew they frowned upon unexplained absences which several of them had been as he hadn't been aware enough to call in to say she would be off. The teacher had also seen him covered in bruises, knew he had been spending time in hospital and had been there when Victoria tried to take Lucy. None of it screamed responsible parenting and it terrified him to think that they could start to question his capability to look after Lucy. The fact he couldn't even turn up for the parents evening definitely wouldn't look good even if he had sent Lucy in with a letter to explain that it would be Bella there in his place.

He was sitting, staring blankly at the TV screen mulling that thought over and getting more and more concerned by it when Esme joined him.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked as she chose Bella's usual spot of the arm of his sofa and feeling low enough to want comfort he leant his head against her.

"I'm worried about parents evening."

"Worried? There's nothing to worry over, Lucy's doing really well." Esme responded, looking to Edward with confusion. She'd been expecting him to be upset over not being able to go but she'd never thought he'd be worried about it. With a child like Lucy parents evenings were more just a formality than anything else. The whole thing would probably be over within minutes.

"I know, she's not the problem. It's me. She's missed school when I've been too ill to realise and they hate it when you don't ring in, in the morning to explain the absence and they've seen me covered in bruises and know I've been in hospital. What if they think I'm not taking good enough care of her?"

"Oh Edward nobody would ever think that. Lucy's never been harmed, and you've always had her exceptionally well turned out plus she so happy, healthy and bright. They know you take good care of her. I'm sure you explained the absences once she went back, didn't you?"

"Yes but it still doesn't look good, turning up at the school gates covered in bruises and there was one day I had to pull her out of school early because I was too badly beaten to stay at work and then the day I arrived late after I overslept. If they investigated it they'd find out I've left her on her own before and about the day she walked to Garrett's by herself." Edward responded as he got carried away by his fears. The more he thought about it, the more glaringly obvious faults he could see in his parenting. When he'd been ill with the flu Lucy had pretty much had to look after herself and him, he'd been no use. Anything could have happened to her and then when he'd ended up in hospital he'd had to rely on virtual strangers to take care of her. It didn't matter that Bella was now his girlfriend, at the time he'd only known her for a couple of weeks. He couldn't even provide Lucy with a decent home, the flat had damp and the entire block was crumbling. It wasn't even in a nice area. Then there was the fact someone was hell bent on killing him and that put Lucy at risk.

Esme could see he was miles away, lost in his thoughts and wasn't quite sure what to do. The fears he was voicing were irrational but she could see how they could well have been warranted just a couple of months ago. He had been struggling, even without James' interference he probably would have hit difficulties. The pneumonia that had hospitalized him quite possibly would have still occurred, his injuries had just helped it take hold sooner but his body would still have been woefully undernourished and that was the main cause of it. While it was clear to anyone that he'd always done his best for Lucy, he couldn't have continued to look after her without taking better care of himself and he hadn't had the means to do that. That wasn't his life anymore though. He had family around to help and he had Bella. There was a home for him at their house for however long he needed or wanted it and there was no way he would ever reach the point where anyone tried to question how Lucy was being cared for. Unfortunately he didn't seem to be seeing that so she ran her hand through his hair before letting it fall to rest on his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.

"They would only investigate if there were signs there was something wrong with Lucy and there clearly isn't. Even if they did, they wouldn't find anything anyway. You've always done your best for her and things like what you're worrying over won't ever happen again because you've got a support system around you now. You have me, Carlisle, Emmett, Alice, Bella and Garrett who are all willing and available to help with Lucy when you need it. All they would find would be a well cared for, happy little girl who's absolutely doted on by her family. You have nothing to worry about, I promise you."

"I can't lose her Esme, I can't." He murmured, his head still carried away in the sheer panic his thoughts had manufactured. It was something he'd always had in the back of his mind as a constant worry as he'd known he was only surviving on the boarder lines of acceptable living and it was part of the reason he'd always kept to himself. He'd been terrified that someone would find out how much he struggled and take Lucy away.

"And you won't. We wouldn't let anyone take her from you not that they'd ever have any reason to try anyway. You're worrying over nothing sweetheart." She comforted him and part of him knew she was right and that he was making a problem that didn't exist but just the possibility of it scared him. It was one of those thoughts that once it had come to him it wasn't going to leave and despite knowing it was just his overactive imagination he was still going to be on edge until Bella returned with Lucy and confirmed everything was fine.

His silence seemed to be understood by Esme as she let him work through his thoughts on his own but did not leave. She held her place by his side offering the comfort that would reinforce that he wasn't on his own anymore. The silence wasn't even uncomfortable, Esme was pleased that he'd voiced his concern in the first place as it was a rare occurrence and she was overjoyed that he had the trust in her to do so. It was a sign he was starting to accept them and wasn't just taking their help because he had no choice which was good. They wanted him to feel comfortable enough to go to them when he had a problem, no matter how trivial it seemed.

"Can I ask you a personnel question?" Edward asked after half an hour of silence. He wasn't getting very far with his own thoughts but something had occurred to him that suddenly seemed important. As he'd pictured social services coming in to investigate them and arriving at his flat he'd realised that he'd much rather have been able to call the Cullen house home if he had that option. It was so much safer in so many ways. Not only was it very unlikely social services would feel the need to instantly remove Lucy from somewhere like the Cullen house but it was also so much better for her to be living there. There weren't constantly arguing neighbours, mould on the walls or rubbish in the hallways. Plus she was happy there and he couldn't deny that he was starting to feel that too. He liked Esme and Carlisle and was even starting to enjoy the feeling of being looked after a little. He didn't really even want to leave anymore.

Everyone kept telling him Esme and Carlisle wanted him and Lucy there and the house was certainly big enough to take them in so it seemed like the perfect solution to everything. Yet they had owned the house long before they'd even found him and Lucy so surely there had to be another reason they'd chosen one with so many rooms. That, paired with Esme and Carlisle's caring nature raised the question of why they didn't have a family of their own to fill their rooms. They were still young enough to be trying for it as well and Edward really didn't want to get in the way if that was the case. Considering how much they seemed to enjoy having everyone around and taking care of Lucy he couldn't really see how they wouldn't want a child of their own to shower with their affection and there was no way he could take up the space, time and care that would require. He knew how amazing having a child could be and after how good they'd been to him it was unthinkable to be the reason they put their dreams of that on hold. If they were trying for a family there was no way they could stay there indefinitely.

"You can ask me anything, we don't hold to keeping secretes in this house." Esme answered as neither her nor Carlisle had anything to hide and it was important for Edward to really trust them. If he had questions, she'd answer them no matter what they were.

"Why don't you and Carlisle have any children of your own?" He asked and while it was a sore subject Esme kept a calm face as she answered. It was something they'd suspected would come up sooner or later so she wasn't too surprised to hear that question although it did seem a little odd timing wise as it didn't really seem connected to what they'd been talking about earlier.

"We tried. We both wanted children but we had problems conceiving and then when I finally did become pregnant I miscarried. There were complications and they resulted in me being unable to have a baby. We thought about adoption but it just didn't feel right at the time."

"I'm so sorry. That must have been horrible. I shouldn't have asked." Edward apologized, horrified that he'd brought an obviously painful time to mind for Esme although she seemed almost unaffected, just a little sad but she covered that with a slightly shaky smile.

"No it's ok. At the time it was devastating but we got through it. It was one of the main reasons we moved back over here. After Carlisle's parents passed away there was nothing really left for us there and we both wanted to be near family. For Carlisle that was Garrett and I had hopes of being able to patch things up with your mother." She responded, "I know I failed with that but I'm glad life brought us back so we could be here for you. Some horrible, painful things have happened to all of us but I like to think they've brought us to where we're meant to be."

Edward remained quiet again for a while as he absorbed Esme's thoughts that were eerily similar to the ones he'd had when taking in the names signed upon his cast. Both of them had needed family and had stumbled upon it unexpectedly and thinking it over Edward realised that he'd been wrong in his thinking that accepting their help was just accepting pity and charity that he didn't need. What he was really doing was letting them care for him and they needed that just as much as he did. He wasn't just a nuisance to them, they really did want him there and they really did enjoy looking after him. After the way his parents had treated him it was an alien concept, one he couldn't help questioning even if he was trying to look at it all in a different light.

"Do you really want me and Luce to live here more permanently?" He eventually asked quietly, jerking Esme's attention away from where it had drifted to the TV and back to him and he was sure he could see the hope in her eyes as she studied him, looking for his thoughts.

"Yes, we'd love you to. Having everyone here has been amazing and we hate the idea of you going back to that flat. I know how hard you had to work to keep it but you never should have had to and you both deserve so much better. You have a home here for however long you want it." She answered and there was no doubting the sincerity of her words. She meant it, they _wanted_ him and Lucy. That thought was more moving than he'd expected and he could feel his eyes glossing over with the emotions it had stirred up. Not wanting to worry Esme as she was still studying him, waiting for him to say something, he smiled through it.

"Do you have the paperwork for my flat here? I'll need to contact the landlord and tell him we're not coming back." He said and Esme couldn't hide her excitement as she leant over to hug him and press a kiss to his forehead.

"We've got everything here and we'll get it all sorted. I'll send Emmett and Alice round to pack everything up for you if you're ok with that?" She offered once she'd pulled back before realising that Edward might not have been too fond of having them poke through all his things.

"No that's fine, it's not like I can do it myself." He responded and he couldn't help but smile at how excited Esme was just because he'd decided to stay with them. It was good to be the cause of someone's happiness for a change.

"Do you mind if I go and ring Carlisle? I'll find the papers as well." She said, already up from her seat so Edward just waved her on and she was out of the room in an instant leaving him to return to watching TV. He was already past the point of being bored with it but at least his worries had been somewhat settled by his decision to stay so he found the daytime TV a little less annoying as he was able to look forward to Lucy and Bella's return rather than worrying over the news they would be bringing.

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><p>Alice got home from school and only briefly stopped into the entertainment room to say hello to her brother. Apparently bored of watching TV he had one of the games consoles plugged in, playing what looked like some kind of racing game and even though he asked if she wanted to play which was an unusual request as he still wasn't really volunteering for company from anyone but Bella or Lucy she found herself turning him down.<p>

It had been a strange day. She'd woken up with a bad feeling and hadn't been able to shake it. All through school she'd been distracted and at lunch she'd called Jasper just to check he was ok. He'd sounded perfectly fine over the phone and had assured her Bella was with him and was also good before they'd hung up. Had anything been wrong with Edward she knew Esme would have alerted them all instantly and there wasn't really anything to go wrong with Emmett as he was at Esme's office for the morning. Esme and Carlisle were also unlikely to be anything but fine as Esme was at home and Carlisle at work while Lucy was safe and well looked after at school so there was nothing to be worrying about yet the bad feeling remained.

By the end of the day the feeling had grown to a churning stomach and the text alert going off on her phone the instant the final bell rang at school made her jump. When she'd fished the phone out of the depths of her bag she'd opened the notification to find a text from her mother. The bad feeling had doubled as not only had the persistent phone calls suddenly stopped several days ago which had been a slight cause for concern even while it was a relief, she had never known her mother to send a text message before. Opening the text had not helped matters as all it had read was 'DO NOT COME HOME". She wasn't sure if the capital letters were just because her mother couldn't find the setting to turn to lowercase or if she was deliberately trying to stress her point. Either way, it didn't look good.

She found Esme in her usual spot of the kitchen although instead of being in the middle of cooking something she was instead sat at the breakfast bar with papers strewn across it.

"What's all this?" She asked as she joined her, for the time being her curiosity just a little stronger than her concern.

"Edward's lease. He's decided to stay here and give up the flat so I'm just checking what needs to be done." Esme explained as she briefly looked up from the paper she was reading, "Will you be willing to help get his things packed up and moved over here at the weekend?"

"Sure, I'll get Jasper to help as well. He really didn't seem to have that much stuff there so it shouldn't take too long." Alice said to which Esme nodded absentmindedly, still looking over the lease.

"I'll ask Emmett as well so you should be able to get it all done in a day I would think." She commented and then they lapsed into silence as Alice stood to put the kettle on and thought about what she'd originally sought Esme out for. She wasn't sure she wanted to bring Esme down with her worries when she was obviously in good spirits over Edward's decision. They should have been celebrating the good news as they'd all been hoping he'd decide to stay and considering his earlier offer for her to stay and play games with him he had to be happy with it too.

The choice was taken out of her hands however when she put Esme's mug of tea down in front of her and she looked up, instantly spotting that Alice was troubled.

"What's wrong?" She asked so with a sigh Alice pulled her phone out and passed it over with the text message open on the screen.

"This is from your mother?" Esme questioned after she'd read the simple sentence and when Alice nodded she sighed and put the phone down. "You know you'll always have a place here right?"

"Yes and thank you for that but that's not what's worrying me. Don't you think it's a little odd she'd send that after being so persistent in wanting us to come home?"

"Knowing your father, not really. You've defied him and after how he treated Edward it doesn't surprise me at all." Esme answered having felt all along that it was only a matter of time before he cut Alice and Emmett off for having the nerve to stand up to him.

"I guess that's true but it still seems odd that she'd text. She never texts and why the silence in between? The calls stopped a couple of days ago. Do you think everything's ok?"

"I'm sure everything is fine. Your mother is a grown woman; you don't need to worry about her. So long as you, Emmett, Edward and Lucy are safe and happy that's all that I'm concerned with." Esme stated and although it was a little harsh it was true. Elizabeth had turned away and ignored her help far too many times and the fact she was cutting ties with the rest of her children was not improving Esme's view of her.

Alice let it go, not wanting to aggravate Esme further but she wasn't quite convinced. The bad feeling was still lingering and she'd be cornering Emmett to see what he thought of the text and if he'd received one too as soon as he got home.

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><p>Bella stood by the school gates waiting for the bell to ring. It still felt weird to look across at all the parents and not find Edward standing there but at least she knew she'd be seeing him later. It had been hard staying away, she knew the college work had to come first but she'd been just as miserable about it as Edward. She had made the headway into it that she'd needed though, her sleepless nights coming in useful for something so she was planning to hang around at the Cullens' until Edward went to bed.<p>

The bell rang and the usual stampede of children followed. Lucy and Anna spotted her straight away and ran straight for her, almost knocking her over as they collided against her legs.

"Wow that's quite a greeting." She commented as they both wrapped their arms around her waist in a giant hug. Obviously she'd been missed which she understood from Lucy as she hadn't seen her since Saturday but Anna usually showed no preference towards her so she guessed the fact she hadn't been on the school run for a while and had spent the last few days locked away in her room studying had actually made Anna miss her.

They dissolved into their usual chatter after they let go of Bella and she was left wishing Edward was there to decipher it. She still wasn't used to dealing with more than one hyperactive child at a time. Smiling and nodding seemed to assure them she was listening though and when they reached Poppy who was parked a little further down the street she could finally understand some of their squealing and joined in a little as she was just as happy to have her car back. Phil had dropped her off at the garage that morning to collect her, freshly repaired and serviced and she was driving perfectly with a comforting growl.

When they got back to the house Bella set the girls up in the living room with drinks and snacks and let Anna have free reign on what they played while she settled into a chair with her laptop and tried to put the finishing touches to the essay she'd been writing the night before.

The essay didn't take her too long to finish so as they all had to go to the parents evening Bella started dinner for everyone and by the time Renee and Phil made it home the table was set, the girls were eating and Bella was just dishing up the rest of the food. It was a bit of a mad dash after that as they hurried through dinner and the girls were sent to change. Eventually when they were all ready to go Bella helped Lucy into the back of Poppy while Renee, Phil and Anna all climbed into Renee's car.

Bella started to feel a little nervous as she drove. She knew Edward had informed the teacher that she would be going in his place but it was still slightly nerve wracking to suddenly be seen as responsible for Lucy. Lucy made it easier though as she suddenly blurted out that Edward had been missing her and expanded on it by telling her that he'd been being grumpy with everyone but her because of it. Bella confided that she'd been just the same and watched Lucy smile in the rear view mirror, calming her nerves a little.

By the time they reached the school Lucy was bubbling with excitement. Bella helped her out of the car then took her hand as they walked towards the school, meeting Renee, Phil and Anna on the way. Looking around the rest of the parents and children Lucy seemed to be the only child who was actually excited to be there; most of them just looked bored whilst some were downright dragging their feet.

They all gathered outside the classroom and the children strayed away from their parents, grouping together and playing with the assortment of toys several of them had brought along, Anna included. Lucy however didn't let go of Bella's hand and sat in the chair next to her, smiling wildly and happily informing any of the children who said hello that Bella was her daddy's girlfriend. It was extremely cute and terrifying at the same time. For Lucy to be so proud of her gave her a lot to live up to and she prayed that she wouldn't ever let her down because there was no way she ever wanted to see that kind of disappointment on her face in place of the smile.

Twenty minutes later the teacher finally called Lucy's name so Bella let her lead the way into the classroom and was a little relieved when the teacher smiled at them as they went through the door. Lucy let go of Bella's hand after she'd introduced her to Miss Wilson exactly as she had all the children outside so blushing slightly Bella took the seat opposite the teacher's desk and Lucy opted to hover nearby rather than go to one of the desks and sit down.

"Thank you for coming, I'm sorry to hear that Mr. Masen couldn't be here. How is he doing? Lucy tells me he's home now." Miss Wilson started as she took her seat and sensing that it was actually genuine concern Bella answered.

"He's a lot better but still at risk from infections which is why he couldn't come. He really wanted to be here though."

"I don't doubt that at all," The teacher said with a smile, "I won't keep you too long. Lucy is a model student and really I just wanted to let her dad know that he doesn't need to worry with how she's doing. I know when something upsetting happens that how a child copes with it can be a concern and difficult to judge but we haven't noticed any changes in her behaviour, she's a very happy, polite, intelligent child and her work is as exemplary as ever."

She went on to detail just how well Lucy was doing, commenting that she was top of the class for her writing, maths and spelling and that she'd come on leaps and bounds with her reading in the last couple of weeks. Her behaviour in class and the playground were both exceptional, always being kind and courteous to the other children and polite and respectful to the staff. There was nothing bad to be said and Bella and Lucy came away with nothing more than praise and well wishes to pass on to Edward.

They said a hurried goodbye to Bella's family as they were heading in next and then left, Lucy still smiling widely and apparently too excited to sit still as she fidgeted in her car seat. Feeling proud of not only Lucy but herself as well and knowing that Edward probably hadn't had the best of days Bella decided half way to the Cullen house as they neared a large supermarket that they all deserved a treat so she pulled into the car park and helped Lucy out.

After gathering a basket full of ice cream, sweets and popcorn they were back in the car and on their way. The roads were quiet so it didn't take them too long and as soon as Bella helped Lucy out of the car again she was running inside to find her daddy. Bella followed a little slower, having to stop to collect Lucy's things and their shopping bag before she could enter the house. Once inside she took off her jacket and hung it up by the door then headed straight for the entertainment room since Edward seemed to have taken up residence there instead of his room and when she joined them he was laid out on his usual sofa with Lucy burrowed into his chest as he nuzzled her hair.

She felt a little like she was intruding as she entered the room but the dazzling smile Edward offered her when he heard movement and looked up instantly put her at ease.

"Hey, how'd it go?" He asked, reaching his arm out towards her so she took the invitation and grabbed hold of his hand, squeezing just a little before letting go again with a smile as she perched on the edge of the sturdy wooden coffee table that had been moved over to be within reach of the sofa.

"Really well, Lucy's amazing but we already knew that and her teacher said to tell you not to worry as she's doing fine and that she hopes you get well soon." She responded and she saw the relief in Edward's eyes as he relaxed back into the arm of the sofa, tension she hadn't previously noticed draining away.

"So everything's ok?" He questioned and when Bella nodded, he finally let his focus drift a little and it landed on the shopping bag Bella had sat down next to her, "What's in there?"

"Ice cream, sweets and popcorn. I figured we all deserved a treat as I'm sure you haven't had the easiest of days and me and Luce totally aced this parents evening malarkey." Bella explained as she picked the bag up and held it so Edward could see into it.

"That sounds like a really good idea." Edward agreed before turning to Lucy, "Esme's in the kitchen, can you take the ice cream through to her to get bowls and spoons? You can tell her all about parents evening as well, I know she's dying to hear what your teacher said."

"Ok, I'll be back really fast." Lucy responded then kissed his cheek and slid out of his arms.

"There's no need to hurry baby, we'll pick a DVD to watch and wait for you." Edward said before she could get too far and she stopped to glance at him. As he gazed steadily back at her she quirked her eyebrow and when he smiled she shook her head and rolled her eyes before taking the ice cream from Bella and running out of the door, pulling it closed behind her.

She was going to have to give Esme the full version of her day's events rather than her original plan of just the highlights but she didn't mind too much. After all, she'd spent the whole afternoon and early evening with Bella so it was only fair her daddy got some time with her as well.

Edward waited until he heard the click of the door closing properly before he moved, quickly pushing himself into a more upright position which enabled him to snag an arm around Bella's waist since she'd stood to sort out the rest of the sweets and pull her down onto the sofa beside him. She yelped in surprise having not been expecting him to move but she didn't have time to voice her surprise further as he tightened his grip, crushing her to his chest and catching her lips with his own.

She didn't even pretend to put up a fight as she wound her fingers into his hair to pull him even closer. Four days was far too many to go without seeing him and as her lips fell open to his tongues gentle persuasion she vowed to never let college work get in the way again. Somehow his hands worked their way under her t-shirt, one coming to rest on her hip while the other slid round to land on her lower back, the burn of the skin to skin contact caused her hands to tighten in his hair and the soft groan that coaxed from Edward made Bella pull back just a little.

"You're going to get me in trouble again." She murmured against his lips, realising how Edward had managed to pull her over him. He was looking at her with darkened eyes and no signs of pain however as he reached up to close the gap she'd put between them, kissing her softly before sinking back down into the sofa.

"Carlisle's at work. Besides, I feel good, really good now you're here." He told her but he could see Bella wasn't quite as into it as before since she'd started to worry about him and he knew she was probably right to be cautious. He wasn't quite as concerned with his own health though when the alternative involved feeling Bella against him so it was good at least one of them had some sense and she'd already moved back to be sitting precariously on the edge of the sofa beside him. While he'd had to give up his hold on her hip, the hand on the small of her back stayed firmly where it was, his fingertips lightly tickling her skin, unwilling to give up the contact completely.

"Even so, we shouldn't be getting carried away when Lucy's probably going to be bursting back through that door any minute."

"We've got time yet, she's got to tell Esme all about today and you know how much she loves to chat." Edward responded hoping to coax Bella back into kissing him despite her having the better sense as he knew Lucy would give them a little more time alone. He could tell she'd understood his remark about not hurrying. They were far too in tune with each other and that eye roll had been her acceptance. She knew he'd missed Bella.

"I also know how excited she's been all night and she couldn't wait to get home to you. Don't you want to hear all about the parents evening anyway? I assumed you'd be going crazy all day over it." Bella tried to distract him as from the way his touch was ghosting across her back she was fairly sure he was still thinking about pulling her back down. As much as she wanted to let him, she couldn't hurt him so they both needed a distraction before her grasp on common sense left her and she gave in.

"I was, but you said everything's ok and I missed you." He answered but her insistence on talking about it suddenly brought his earlier worries back to the forefront and his hand on her back froze as he tensed and the easy smile vanished from his face, "Everything is ok right? There's not something you didn't want to say in front of Lucy?"

"Hey...wherever your head just went, stop it." Bella hurriedly responded seeing the panic jump to life. She had by no means meant to scare him and she didn't really understand where the sudden panic had even come from. As far as she was aware there was never any question on how well Lucy was doing, "Everything really is fine. In fact her teacher made a point to stress that, she wanted to make sure you knew Lucy was coping fine with everything at school, there's been no changes in her behaviour or anything. She's very pleased with her."

"She wasn't concerned about my ability to look after Lucy?" Edward asked, his fears bubbling through even though Esme had done her best to reassure him they'd been pointless. The look Bella was giving him suggested she felt the same way.

"Of course not! Where did you get that idea from?" She asked horrified at even the suggestion of it. Anyone who tried to question his parenting ability had to be insane.

"I was kind of stressing out over it earlier. Esme told me I was being silly but once an idea like that is there it's hard to shake. I used to worry about it a lot." He admitted.

"Well you should listen to her. Lucy's teacher was concerned for you, but that seemed genuine and she was too busy gushing about how brilliant Lucy is to mention anything else." Bella said which was enough to get Edward back to a more positive line of thinking and she felt him relax again.

"Gushing eh? Tell me exactly what she said then." He replied and Bella was relieved at his smile so repeated, word for word exactly what the teacher had told her. She could see how proud Edward was of Lucy as his smile just kept growing and it felt good to be a part of that.

"Well she definitely deserves the treats you brought us. Was it ok for you? I know how scary those things are after the first one." He commented, flashing back to the stares he'd received when he'd walked in and the nerves he'd felt at what the teacher would have to say to him.

"I was a little nervous but it wasn't bad and Lucy didn't let go of my hand. She was telling everyone we met that I was your girlfriend. I don't think I've ever seen a child who was so excited about parents evening before."

"I think that was just because you were with her. She really wasn't that excited the first time. I hope you don't mind her showing you off."

"No, it was cute and I'm glad she was happy." Bella answered while reaching over to link her fingers through his on the hand that wasn't tracing patterns on her back, "I know I don't compare to having you there."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that. She's been stuck with just me all her life and I think she's enjoying having another girl around."

"Maybe but she loves you more than anything. She might be a little swept away by all the new people in your lives recently but if she had to choose she'd still pick you every time."

Lucy proved Bella right when she returned clutching two bowls of ice cream. Bella had already picked a DVD and set it up before returning to sit beside Edward as he'd shuffled down a little on the sofa to make room but had settled leaning against Bella who had her feet propped up on the coffee table. Lucy handed Bella her bowl before climbing right over her to settle in Edward's arms, giving him the ice cream to hold that they'd both be sharing. It made Bella smile to see it as she was glad that while they'd made room for her in their lives, their own little routines hadn't been disrupted.

The ice cream didn't last long and once it was gone they all shuffled into a more comfortable position. Edward moved to lay down, letting his head rest in Bella's lap while Lucy moved with him, curling into his side. They shared the bags of sweets and popcorn between them, Edward claiming the bags as he managed to not only watch the film but also keep an eye on and limit how much of the sugary snacks Lucy was eating.

Despite all the sugar Lucy still fell asleep midway through the film and since she was resting on Edward and Bella had noticed him fidgeting a little trying to stay comfortable she offered to put her to bed. Edward was a little reluctant to let her go but he'd forgotten to take his last set of painkillers with the distraction of Lucy and Bella's return and Carlisle's absence and his ribs were starting to hurt. When Bella assured him she'd be right back and could stay a little later he felt better about it though so he kissed Lucy's head then helped Bella to disentangle her from him and lift her up.

It didn't take Bella long to get Lucy into bed, she woke a little when Bella was changing her into her pyjamas but she fell back to sleep straight away allowing Bella to get back to Edward where they resumed their previous positions with Edward using her for a pillow. They were so comfortable together that when the doorbell rang neither of them moved and though Bella thought she maybe ought to answer it as they were the closest to the front door she reasoned that it wasn't her house and she didn't want to disturb Edward as he seemed awfully peaceful where he was so instead she ignored it and focused on playing with his hair making him hum contentedly.

Bella needn't have worried as Esme heard the doorbell go and stood from the breakfast bench where she'd been sitting drinking a glass of wine as she looked over some plans Emmett had brought home from the office for her. She was a little confused as to who would be at their door as they didn't really get many visitors who weren't prearranged and it was late, already well past ten o clock but she went to the door to answer it anyway.

Pulling open the door she found a small figure swimming in an oversized hooded top with a stack of paper files clutched to their chest. She didn't recognise them and couldn't even see their face as it was shadowed by the hood that was pulled up but their posture didn't look threatening.

"Can I help you?" She asked warily, clutching the door and preparing to step back and swing it shut just in case but then the person moved and she froze. A slim feminine hand appeared from beneath the too long sleeves and reached up to knock the hood back from their face.

"I know I shouldn't be here but there are some things you need to know. For Edward's sake. Please, just let me in, I can't be seen here and I'll be gone as soon as I've explained."

It wasn't the shock of seeing Elizabeth on her doorstep, or the surprise at her usually perfectly presented sister being dressed in a worn pair of sweats and what she assumed had to be one of Emmett's sweatshirts from the size of it or even her words that made Esme take a step back and allow her to enter the house before closing the door behind her.

Instead it was the bruised cheek and the swelling eye and most of all, the small, darkened mark encrusted with dried blood that looked exactly like a calligraphy 'M' that did it.

It sat high on her cheek bone and was identical to the insignia on the ring she had seen Edward Senior wear. The ring he never took off.

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><p><em>AN - Thank you to everyone who is still reading this, especially those of you who take the time to leave a review - it's very much appreciated :)<em>


	48. Chapter 46 A City On Fire

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer and the chapter title belongs to a song by Fightstar.

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><p><strong>Chapter 46 – A City On Fire<strong>

Esme headed to the kettle as soon as she entered the kitchen with Elizabeth behind her. She wasn't sure what to make of her sisters sudden appearance. She had promised herself that she wouldn't waste any more of her time or concern on her and she was furious over the position she was forcing her into with Edward just a couple of rooms away. He was the most important thing right then and he'd only just decided to stay with them, there was no way Esme wanted anything to make him question that decision so soon after making it and seeing his mother there was a sure way to do that. It made her want to insist Elizabeth leave straight away, before he could find out she was there but then she'd see the bruises and know she couldn't turn her away.

Reaching for the kettle on autopilot she suddenly stopped and turned around. Tea just wasn't going to cut it this time. Striding back over to the breakfast bench where Elizabeth had come to a halt she grabbed her wine glass and downed what remained in it. She then crossed back to the counter where she'd left the bottle and refilled her glass before facing her sister once more, holding the bottle up in a silent question. Elizabeth shook her head in response before lowering her gaze and taking a seat.

Esme didn't join her, choosing to maintain her distance and lean against the counter instead but she watched as Elizabeth fidgeted uncomfortably with the files she was holding. She split them into three, sitting two of the piles to the side on the bench, carefully avoiding the papers Esme had already spread out, and left the third stack on her lap. It was slightly thicker than the other two. She didn't speak straight away, something that annoyed Esme so she took another sip of her wine before speaking, trying not to let her displeasure at seeing Elizabeth show.

"Why are you here? Do you need help?" She asked managing to keep her voice even but Elizabeth still jumped a little as her gaze snapped back up allowing Esme to see the bruising once more. It looked fresh and she wondered if she ought to insist Elizabeth stay until Carlisle got home and could take a look at it but she really didn't want her staying in the house that long. The longer she was there, the higher the chance Edward would find out and with him finally relaxing in the house and considering it home Esme really did not want anything to spoil that. Elizabeth would not have been welcome in his flat so the same was true of their house. They needed to get the conversation over quickly.

"No, that's not why I'm here. I told you, there's some things you need to know." Elizabeth answered quietly making Esme scoff as if that was the case she would have been talking already.

"So it's got nothing to do with the bruise on your face?" She asked as she pointed to it. She was finding it increasingly hard to stay calm especially as Elizabeth seemed to be settling down. The fidgeting had stopped and she looked cool behind the bruising. She should not have looked comfortable there and it was infuriating.

"What?" Elizabeth responded, almost seeming to have forgotten she was hurt before she blinked and lifted a hand to lightly brush against the marks on her pale skin, "Oh no, not directly anyway. That's not important."

"Your husband hits you and you think that's not important?" Esme questioned, eyeing her sister as if she was insane which at that point she wasn't altogether sure wasn't the case but with that question something hardened within Elizabeth and Esme could see it in the change of her posture as she sat up straighter and held her gaze.

"No, it's not. It wasn't even his fault and it is not what I came here for." She answered clearly before tapping the files she still held on her lap, "This is what is important."

"Not his fault? I know that mark came from his ring; I've seen it enough in the past to recognise it. He hurts you and you're still defending him? What exactly will it take for you to see him for the monster he is?" Esme spat, too enraged by her sisters blatant lack of common sense to focus on anything else right then but instead of meeting the cool front she usually found when it came to Elizabeth she was met by her own fire.

"I can see him for the monster you take him for. I have for a long time but this mark was not his fault. Yes he hit me, but he was, or is, drunk and I did everything within my power to provoke him into it. I'm doing what I should have done years ago and destroying him. I need you to listen to me, when Ed realises what I'm doing I have no idea how he will respond. You have to protect the kids." She stated forcefully.

That caught Esme's interest as for the first time since childhood the woman sitting in front of her actually resembled the sister she loved. The spirit she'd been missing since Ed had walked into her life was finally back and for once she was actually doing something, although by the state of her face Esme wasn't convinced that what she was doing was good.

"What exactly are you doing and why does it involve getting yourself hurt?" She asked, sliding into a chair and relinquishing her grip on the wine glass as some of her anger and frustration started to diminish. She was willing to listen to anything if it involved taking Edward Senior down. He'd had far too much power over the people she loved for far too long.

"I'm ruining him. I needed something obvious that would cast doubt on the perfect reputation he's so carefully constructed. What's better than this?" She responded, pointing to her face, "His partners will see the mark and they'll recognise it just like you did, he won't be able to manipulate his way out of this one and they're not going to want a wife beater leading their company. It would be bad for business."

"That's...kind of...devious. I like it." Esme commented feeling compelled to smile at the idea of it. It was entirely fitting that he be brought down from his high station in society in exactly the same way he'd achieved it, through games and deception and it was even more fitting that his wife be the one to do it considering she'd probably learnt exactly how to from the man himself. She could see how it would work and even understand why Elizabeth had chosen to let herself be hurt as it was certainly one of the most effective and clear cut ways to cast doubt on a man's character but then she remembered the cruel reality of how they'd come to be there.

Elizabeth had stood by Ed through some horrendous decisions so despite the promising plan she'd put forward Esme just wasn't sure she could actually trust her and she wasn't about to aid her until she could be sure it wouldn't back fire on Edward, Alice and Emmett. They had to be her first priority.

"What happened to loving him and standing by him? After everything that's already happened why are you doing this now?"

"He's going too far. He's willing to completely destroy Edward just to keep his precious reputation and I can't let him do that." Elizabeth responded smoothly but that increased Esme's doubts as it made no sense. What could be worse than what Ed had already done to Edward after all?

"You let him chuck him out," She pointed out, "What else can he do to him?"

"That was always a mistake but it was one that was better for him in the long run. Ed would have made his life a living hell if he'd stayed and as I've told you before I always had faith that Edward would manage. He was far too bright and resourceful not to and I did have plans to help him and I would have followed through on them if Ed hadn't suspected and blocked them. Why do you think I let Emmett look for him if I didn't intend to help him? I knew all along what he was doing and I knew he had a better chance of succeeding than I did, Ed didn't pay as much attention to what he was doing as he did to me. I was intending to try and send him money or something through him once he found them. It backfired of course when Emmett brought them to the house, if he'd told me he'd found them first I would have told him and warned him not to do that. I never dreamed he'd think it could be a good idea." Elizabeth tried to explain but Esme angrily cut her off, unable to hear any more of her pathetic reasoning.

"That wasn't good enough! You should have tried harder and found a way to get help to him sooner. I can't accept that there was nothing that you could do. You should have sent him to me if he couldn't stay with you. I won't argue that he wasn't better off away from Ed, you all would have been but you can't just leave it at that. He was sixteen! He could barely look after himself never mind a child."

"You're right, you've always been right but there's nothing I can do to change it now. If I'd known where you were I would have tried to get Edward to you but I didn't."

"You should have had my address, Mum knew it and she told me she'd given it to you even if you wouldn't use it. We hadn't moved at that point." Esme huffed, unwilling to back down as even if it was too late, Edward deserved to have someone fight for him.

"Ed took it and destroyed it. It was lost the same day she gave it to me. He didn't want me to be in contact with you probably for fear I'd eventually figure out you were right about him. Unfortunately for him I figured it out anyway and as for what he's planning to do now - he's representing James Hadrian. They're planning to make Edward seem like the bad guy in everything, they've got it all worked out with photos, statements and evidence. If this goes to court as it is now they'll take Lucy away and James will be free in no time." Elizabeth explained patiently, taking Esme's anger as she deserved it but trying to move the conversation along as she needed Esme to understand what was going on and she didn't have much time. Going over old arguments, while valid, was not going to help anyone.

Esme stared at her in horror, trying to understand a concept that just didn't want to compute. It was far too horrendous to even consider that Edward's own father would try to help the man who had attempted to murder him never mind that they'd try to cast doubt on Edward whilst doing so yet she knew Elizabeth was telling the truth. It was just too ludicrous to be a lie.

"How? How can they do that?" She spluttered and Elizabeth finally let go of the files, opening them up and showing Esme the collection of notes, written statements and photographs.

"They've been following Edward for a long time. They have photos that show him leaving his flat on his own without Lucy and of Lucy leaving by herself. There are even photos of the inside of the flat and they're trying to say he's an unfit father while destroying his character. According to James, Edward took advantage of Lucy's mother while she was drunk at a party and then refused to acknowledge the pregnancy. Then they're saying he refused to let them see Lucy after Jessica left her with him which resulted in her depression and subsequent death. The plot to hurt him they're blaming on Riley, from what I can make out James always had it set up so that if they got caught the blame would fall to him and leave James free to do as he wished. The final attack, and the attack on Bella they're putting down to a psychotic break that was caused by something Edward did during their last argument. It's all in these files."

"Surely no one would believe those lies. Edward's remembered the attack, he's backed Riley's version of events."

"But they know Riley visited Edward in the hospital. They've got pictures from the CCTV showing him entering the hospital. If they can prove Riley visited him, they can suggest he's influenced Edward's memory of the events. His statement wouldn't mean anything. The fact he didn't report any of the earlier attacks or the break in to his flat when they happened doesn't look good for him as it suggests he's either making it up or is trying to hide something about them. Emmett breaking James' nose in a crowded club also works to James' favour as the only thing that can actually be accounted for is an apparently unprovoked attack against James which would tie in with his claim that Edward's antagonistic to him and not the other way around."

"That's absolute nonsense! Edward's not like that at all. All he's ever tried to do is look after Lucy. What can we do to stop this?"

"I'm taking away Ed's credibility. I'm going to go to his partners as soon as I leave here and tell them the whole story. They won't let their company represent James if they know the truth of what's going on. Ed thinks they trust him but I'm fairly certain they don't and they'll have no choice but to believe me when they see my face. They're already starting to question him because of Emmett's resignation and Alice moving out. James won't be able to get himself a decent lawyer after this, they're a very influential law firm and they'll blacklist him. If there's one thing they value it's family, that's why we even had children in the first place, Ed wanted them to like him. If they know what he's doing to his own family I don't think they'll stand for it."

"Well that's good I guess but how did it get to this? I don't understand how he could do this to his own child." Esme sighed. What Elizabeth was telling her of her plans sounded promising but they shouldn't have been needed in the first place and if what she was saying about James' statements was true then no matter what they did, whatever lawyer he did find would have that information. Not having a lawyer that was as high power as Ed's firm would be good but it wouldn't take the problem away entirely.

"I told you, he never wanted children. We had Emmett so he could pretend to be a family man and look good in the eyes of his bosses. Being a good father apparently makes him more trustworthy or something and to the outside eye that's what he looks like. The kids got good grades, were never in trouble and were always respectful and polite when he brought anyone important home. We looked like the perfect family but in reality Ed didn't care for or want it. He never wanted anymore than the one child, he made that very clear but I wanted more. I loved being a mom and I adored having Emmett. Ed was always at the office and I got lonely, I wanted a full house. I tricked him into having Edward by not taking my pill when he thought I was. He's never liked him, right from the moment he knew I was pregnant. I thought things would be better once he was born, I even named him after Ed in the hope it would soften him up but it didn't. He never had much to do with Edward unless it was berating him. When Lucy's mother turned up on the doorstep there was never any doubt what he'd do. It was the excuse he'd been looking for, for years, he'd never wanted him and he had what he saw as a valid reason to get rid of him. He certainly wouldn't have wanted Lucy around when he can't even stand being around his own children for any length of time."

"If that's the case...what about Alice? She doesn't seem to have any problems with him." Esme pointed out unable to understand how someone could hate their own child for no valid reason especially as from what she'd heard, he'd never treated Alice the same way.

"She was an accident when I was on antibiotics and she's Alice, she wins everyone over eventually. I think the fact she was a girl helped, it made his whole picture of a perfect family more complete I guess." Elizabeth shrugged having never really understood the double standard herself.

"So how did throwing Edward and Lucy out fit into that picture?" Esme questioned finding a new level of hatred for her brother in law. The fact he could hate Edward purely for existing was intolerable.

"It didn't but neither did a sixteen year old with a child. For Lucy to exist Edward had to have gone against several of Ed's rules. He wasn't meant to be sneaking out to parties, drinking or having sex. In Ed's eyes it was a blatant disregard of everything he expected from his children and he wouldn't stand for it. It was an embarrassment to him that would show people he couldn't control his children and hadn't brought them up with the correct moral standards. That's why he told everyone Edward had gone to stay with you. No one would know he had a child and nobody thought anything of it when Ed told them he'd gone to America. They all thought it was a marvellous opportunity for him, they praised Ed for letting him go. It was sickening."

"If he wants no one to know about Lucy so badly then why is he helping James? It makes no sense. Why not just leave Edward alone?"

"It's too late for that. He would have carried on the way we were but when Emmett quit and then Alice left home people started asking why. Then Laurent and Emmett being mixed up in it all at the firm led Ed to get more involved then he would have liked. That's why I tried to get them to come home. I was hoping we could avoid whatever was brewing by pretending nothing was wrong but when they refused and James asked to meet with Ed it became clear that what happened with Edward was going to come to light. There was no way people wouldn't link Edward to us. Anyone who knew us would know that we'd lied about his whereabouts and when it went to court the story would have come out and Ed would have been painted in a less than favourable light. By helping James concoct the story he has, it allows Ed to save face. He can claim Edward ran away when we thought he was in America and that he had no idea of what had happened. By destroying Edward's character Ed can make it seem like Edward was doing it all behind his back. It's not perfect, questions will be asked but it's better than everyone knowing he turned his back on his own son and granddaughter. Aside from that I truly believe he's starting to feel guilty. After he met with James he stopped talking to me and starting drinking heavily. He knows what he did and is doing now is wrong but I think he feels it's too late to turn back on it now. He can either try and salvage something out of it or lose it all. Considering being a parent isn't something that comes naturally with him he's going for survival." Elizabeth explained and Esme felt sick. She couldn't see how Elizabeth had ever married him when she seemed to know just what a manipulative, selfish, cold hearted man Ed really was.

"That's really disgusting. He doesn't deserve to ever have had a family. How your kids are so well adjusted I'll never know."

"He doesn't have a family anymore, I'm making sure of that. He's going to be left with exactly what he deserves – nothing." Elizabeth responded, "He's gotten sloppy since he started drinking. He brought all these case notes home with him then passed out in the living room. I stole and made copies of them and I've managed to transfer everything out of our current account into a new account I opened in Alice's name. All the paper work for it is in the file and I want her to share it between her brothers and herself. Ed can't access it, that money is lost to him now. Once I leave here I'm going straight to his partners and they'll hopefully vote him out of the business. Then I'm going to the police and giving them everything I've got from his notes on James. I've left everything on Edward out of that copy but it's in the one I'm giving to you. You need to know what could be thrown at him so he's prepared."

"Do you think it'll be enough to prove James planned it all?"

"I'm not sure, I hope so." Elizabeth answered as it was the only plan she had and she really couldn't stand to see anything else happen to Edward. She'd let him go through far too much already. It had to work.

"Does Ed realise that by trying to help James get out he's effectively helping to kill his own son?" Esme asked, catching the way Elizabeth winced with her words.

"I don't know. I'm not sure he's thinking very clearly at all but you were right about him all along. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you."

"I'm sorry too. I'll do everything I can to keep them safe, Carlisle will too and we'll work out what to do for Edward." Esme said, relenting to the fact that Elizabeth was doing her best to put things right so it was only fair to reassure her that they'd do the same.

"Thank you, I should get going. I need to have this all underway before Ed wakes up and realises what I've done." Elizabeth said reminding Esme that she was putting herself into the line of fire to do what she had planned which wasn't ideal.

"I'm glad you're doing this but be careful. Are you coming back here once you're done?"

"No, I know Edward wouldn't want me here, I doubt Emmett or Alice do either."

"Where will you go? You can't go home, not if Ed's there." Esme asked thankful that she wasn't going to have to smooth things over with the kids just yet but knowing that she would do it if she had to. She couldn't watch her sister go back to Ed, not now she'd finally broken free of the strange hold he had over her.

"I've got some money; I'll find a hotel or something. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine." Elizabeth reassured her although it didn't sound convincing and Esme got the impression she hadn't really thought ahead that far yet. She hoped once everything was done she'd have a bit of a clearer idea of what to do with herself. It was going to be hard to suddenly be looking after herself after years of having Ed dictate everything she did and Esme hoped she'd ask for help if she needed it even if she wasn't sure what she could do for her. They'd work something out if it came to it though, they were family after all.

"Come back here if you need to. We can work things out with the kids I'm sure, Alice at least was already concerned for you." Esme said as she rose from her seat and moved around the bench so she could hug her when Elizabeth stood as well, "It's good to see my sister back, I missed you."

"I'm sorry for that, I really am. I loved him too much to see what he was doing to me, I thought nothing else mattered so long as I had him. I should never have let him come between us and I really regret not being there for you when you needed me. I'm so glad you had Carlisle." She murmured in response knowing that it wasn't just Edward she'd let down so badly. She hadn't been there for her sister after the deaths of their father or mother either and that was inexcusable. There were a lot of things she was going to have to make up for if everything worked out.

"Thank you, it's good to hear you say that but as you said before, we can't change the past. We can however work on the future. Come back here if you need to." Esme responded seeing more and more of the sister she'd lost returning and not wanting to lose her again.

"Not until I've done my best to put things right." Elizabeth answered and Esme smiled at the determination she could hear in her voice but that soon vanished as they both heard the squeak of wheels coming closer to the kitchen door and they broke apart from their hug just in time to watch the door push open.

"Mum?" Edward questioned as soon as he saw her standing in front of him. She was the last person he'd expected to be visiting the Cullen house and had he known he would have taken up Bella's offer to get his pills for him without insisting that he wanted to say goodnight to Esme.

Elizabeth was too unsure of what the best thing to do would be and stood frozen. She'd never intended to be seen by anyone other than Esme and Carlisle. The last thing she'd wanted to do was cause more upset to any of her children and after everything that had happened she was well aware that she would be one the of last people any of them would want to see, especially Edward. The plan was to put things right as best she could and then try to salvage some kind of relationship with them all if they wanted it well aware that it was probably just too late for that when it came to Edward.

Still she couldn't help but notice that as they stood there, Edward did not appear angry to see her. Instead he was staring at the bruising on her face and she could see the moment he distinguished the mark left by her husband's ring as his brow furrowed and he glared at it.

"I was just leaving." She blurted as she started to feel uncomfortable under his stare. Even as she turned away to pick up the files she needed she could still feel his eyes on her but she did her best to ignore them. Now wasn't the time for any kind of confrontation, she still had work to do.

"Esme I'll let you know if anything else comes up. I don't think he'll know I've been here but in case he does, please don't let him in if he turns up." She said turning to her sister who was still just as frozen as she had been waiting for Edward's reaction but her words shook her enough to respond.

"He was never welcome here even before this so you don't need to worry about that. Be careful." She reiterated before Elizabeth took off, hurrying to make her way out of the room only to be stopped by Edward catching her arm as she tried to pass him.

"Dad did that, didn't he?" He asked nodding towards her bruised cheek and too startled by him reaching out to her, Elizabeth found herself nodding.

"Why?" Edward continued and Elizabeth was stunned to see concern in his eyes when she'd expected to find nothing but anger from him. He was a better person than she could ever hope to be if he could feel anything for her other than contempt after everything she had allowed to happen.

"Because I'm finally trying to put things right." She answered quietly hoping he'd understand what she meant and still shocked he was paying her any attention at all and not just demanding that she leave.

"Put what right?" He questioned and it broke her heart all over again to see the wariness in his eyes. She couldn't blame him for being unable to trust her but it hurt to know that he might still want some kind of reconciliation yet didn't want to risk hoping for it. She'd put that vulnerability there and she wanted so badly to take it away and make it better but she didn't think that was possible. Still, she couldn't leave it like that so she tried to carefully word her response in the hope he'd believe her. He had to know that she loved him.

"I always loved you and I always will. I should have fought harder for you and you'll never know how much I regret that I didn't. I wanted you to be happy and I knew you'd never have that around your father. He would have made your life miserable but that's no excuse for what happened and I know that now. I can't change what happened but I can at least try to fix things now. I love you, you'll always be my little boy and I hope one day you can forgive me but I'll understand if you can't." She told him and as Edward stared at her with confusion his grip on her arm slackened enough for her to pull it free. She leaned down, cupping the back of his head with one hand as she pressed a kiss to his forehead before she straightened and pulled away, heading once more for the door. She'd said all she could and it was time to put the actions behind the words to prove to him she meant them.

"Wait! What are you doing?" Edward called after her, coming out of his confused daze as he heard her move past him. Her words didn't make sense when put together with how his parents had treated him and he didn't understand what was going on. She shouldn't have even been there in the first place and he should have been glad she was leaving as the last two times he'd seen her she'd done nothing but turn her back on him. Seeing the obvious proof that she'd had a disagreement with his father though made him feel for her as he knew what being on that side of him was like and though she'd done nothing to help him, he didn't want to see anyone else suffer at his hands especially as the fact she was there seemed to suggest it was something to do with him. He had to know what was going on.

"Esme can explain it, I need to go, I'm running out of time. Look after yourself." Elizabeth called back but she didn't stop and fled for the front door instead. She had to leave before she caved and begged to stay. She didn't want to stand up against her husband, the thought of it terrified her and ripped at her heart but the sight of Edward in his cast and wheelchair was enough to propel her forward. She couldn't stand by and let anymore harm come to him and Ed had ceased to be the man she loved years ago.

Edward Senior had to be brought down from the pedestal he'd built for himself and she was going to make sure he fell in the most painful way even if it meant falling with him. By the time she was finished he'd have nothing but the house left and all that would be was a reminder of everything he'd lost.

His spell had been broken and it was time everyone saw him for the evil, manipulative bully he was.

* * *

><p>"Explain." Edward demanded as soon as they heard the front door bang shut. He wasn't even really aware of Bella pushing him closer to the breakfast bar as he was so focused on Esme. He hadn't really understood what his mother had said, it was too confusing but he got the impression that it was vitally important to him. He had to know what was going and he needed the answers right then.<p>

Esme didn't even try to deflect his questioning as it was clear he wasn't going to settle until he knew exactly what was going on. She was just glad he didn't seem angry at Elizabeth being there. Her worst fears had been his trust being broken just by seeing her there as she'd heard the way he'd reacting to the home visit Emmett had talked him into. She wouldn't have been able to blame him if that had been the case either so she certainly wasn't going to hide anything from him now. He needed to know anyway as they needed a plan in place for whatever James tried to use in his defence.

Watching Edward and Esme, Bella stayed quiet, listening but not intruding. It wasn't her place to ask questions and Edward was doing a good enough job on his own. Instead she quietly went about getting Edward's medication, pressing a glass of water into his hands and handing him the right pills for him to down distractedly as his focus remained glued to Esme. Once that was taken care of Bella joined them at the breakfast bar, glancing over the file that sat open on top of it.

Seeing its contents made her feel sick as it was clear from the photos that were visible just how close an eye James had been keeping on Edward and Lucy. His statement was lying to the side and reading over it she had to grudgingly admit it was good. What he'd done may have been born from the logic of a mad man but it all made sense. He'd planned the entire thing meticulously and they'd all played right into his hands. Taking everything at face value with no further insight into it, it was easy to see how he could come out seeming fairly innocent. He even admitted to the attempt on Edward's life and attacking her, making it seem like he regretted it and had never meant for it to happen. With a good lawyer putting his side across it would be easy to see a man, heartbroken by the loss of his sister looking to reunite with his niece, the last remaining link to her. It was even understandable how being repeatedly denied would trigger a break in someone quite clearly showing a history with mental illness. All the plotting was pinned on Riley, angry at loosing Lucy after being her main carer and looking for revenge on the man who'd lead to his sister's death. Even that made sense considering it was so well thought out it didn't seem possible that it could have been carried out by someone as unstable as James. Riley showed no signs of any such condition. He was the perfect scapegoat. It was a wonderfully concocted plot of lies and she was just starting to wonder how Elizabeth had come across the files when she tuned back into Esme and Edward's conversation.

"You're father's intending to represent James in court." Esme was saying which snapped Bella's attention straight to Edward whose face had gone pale as a fine tremble ran through his shoulders. When he leant forward, sinking his head into his hands with his elbows propped on his knees she reached across to rub his back, reminding him that she was there.

Esme continued to explain just what Elizabeth intended to do and Bella was glad she'd chosen to stand up to her husband. She'd seen the possibility of it coming when they'd spent the night together at Edward's beside. Elizabeth had wanted to be there for her son and Bella had seen that but she'd needed something else to push her into action which made Bella slightly glad Ed had shown his true colours.

It was a complicated situation but from the way Edward was sitting relatively calmly, listening carefully to every word Esme said Bella was sure he wouldn't turn his mother away if she did return. She had been right before in thinking that he wanted her in his life, he was just too scared to let himself hope for it but Esme's explanations were obviously affecting him. If Elizabeth followed through on her plans there was a good chance Edward would forgive her.

"Why's he doing this? I never did anything to make him hate me so much. All I ever tried to do was make him proud of me." Edward asked mournfully and both he and Bella caught the unease in Esme as she tried to work out how to answer him.

"I'm not sure you'd want to know his reasoning, it's not good." She started hesitantly but as Edward continued to stare at her, waiting for further explanation anyway she sighed and relented, telling him exactly what Elizabeth had said, feeling helpless as she watched the despair settle over Edward at hearing his father had never wanted him.

"Well, I guess that explains a few things." Edward commented blankly, his walls visibly coming up around him as his face cleared of all emotion, "I think I'm going to go to bed."

"Are you sure there's nothing else you want to ask or talk about?" Esme asked not liking the way he'd closed off so suddenly. It didn't feel right but she could see they weren't going to get any further and a glance to Bella showed she felt the same as she was already standing to help Edward from the room.

"No, it's been a long day." He said just as blankly so Esme reached over to grasp his hand.

"Ok then, I know it's a lot to take in but know that we're here for you and we will sort everything out. We love you." She told him wanting to offer what she could to try and take the edge off of hearing that his father had never cared for him.

"I know, thank you." He muttered in response although whether he meant it or was just saying it to placate her Esme didn't know. They'd just have to make sure they did what they could to make him feel it in the days to come.

"I'll give you a hand." Bella commented, taking hold of his chair as he started to try and turn it towards the door. He didn't complain and just said goodnight to Esme before Bella pushed him out of the kitchen and towards his room. He didn't really need her help once there as he'd mastered the art of changing and getting into his bed by himself but as he thought about her having to leave for the night he didn't want her to go.

"Stay with me tonight?" He pleaded once she'd steered him into his room and when she moved around his chair to face him she saw the crack in his mask. He wasn't ok. He was lost, confused and hurt and there was no way she could have said no so instead she crossed to his drawers and pulled out a t-shirt, making him smile a little in the process.

She really shouldn't have agreed as she had college in the morning but once they climbed into bed, setting the alarm on her phone to go off extra early didn't seem like such a hardship. Edward was still quiet, not having uttered a word since asking her to stay but he curled into her side, letting her hold him so she wrapped one arm around him and let her other hand slide into his hair.

It didn't take Edward long to fall asleep but Bella stayed awake a little longer pondering his behaviour. He didn't seem shocked by what Esme had revealed, just disheartened and Bella got the impression that he'd probably always known on some level that his father disliked him. Hearing the truth of it though had to be hard to take. She couldn't imagine how awful it would feel to know that one of the people who were meant to love you unconditionally had never in fact even wanted you. It was easy to understand why he'd wanted her to stay the night and she'd do anything she could to ensure he felt wanted and loved which he very much was.

The rest of the news he seemed to have taken surprisingly well. There'd been no visible anger, just a sense of resignation which made her wonder if he'd been waiting for things to go wrong once again. Considering how his life had gone up to that point it probably wasn't surprising but it made her hurt for him. What James was planning for his defence was worrying and it was likely Edward would end up dwelling on it, especially as the parents evening had already brought up his concerns about losing Lucy. It was bad timing for that particular aspect to come up but at least they knew, thanks to Elizabeth finding the files, and could plan accordingly. She was sure Carlisle and Esme would be able to ensure Lucy remained where she was no matter what James tried even if Edward wasn't and she hoped he'd be able to gain some trust in that.

The next few days were going to be tough for everyone as Edward Senior's betrayal sank in. Emmett and Alice were not going to take the news well and the whole house would be on edge waiting for more news from Elizabeth. Bella just hoped Edward wouldn't pull away from them all and the fact he'd asked her to stay gave her some reassurance that at least he wouldn't push her away. He needed everyone around him, if they were going to fight James' allegations and his father's corruption then they needed to stay strong and united.

Elizabeth may have been starting the battle but they were all going to have to fight it. Taking Ed down and out of the picture was a good start but James would still be there and it was clear he had contingency plans.

* * *

><p><em>AN - Well there you have it, I know a few of you were wondering what Ed was up to. Was that what you were expecting from him?<em>

_ If there's many mistakes with missing 'd's then I apologise...my boyfriend has managed to break the key on my laptop..it's dangling half off right now so it's a little awkward to use. I think I caught most of them though. On the plus side, I wouldn't have got this posted tonight if he hadn't told me off for not hearing any typing when he knew I was trying to get this done. There's far too many distracting stories around!_

_As always, thank you for reading and for the reviews :)  
><em>


	49. Chapter 47 Revelations

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Chapter 47 - Revelations<strong>

Edward wasn't ready to wake up. He was warm, comfortable and far too peaceful to allow reality back in but his pillow was moving.

It wasn't his usual pillow as there was a faint scent of strawberries to it that he knew didn't belong to Esme's fabric softener. There was also a rhythmic beat coming from within it that sped up ever so slightly when he nuzzled further into it in an attempt to stay in his sleepy bubble but at that moment he was too comfortable to be bothered questioning it.

He grumbled a little when the pillow moved underneath him again, earning himself a soft giggle and a set of familiar fingers running gently through his hair. That snapped him awake as he realised he had in fact been nuzzling Bella's breast and as he pulled back sharply his hand appeared from underneath the t-shirt she'd borrowed to sleep in.

"I'm so sorry." He mumbled, mortified that he'd effectively been groping her in his sleep. He was so embarrassed he couldn't even look at her as he waited for her to yell at him so he missed her amused smile.

"Don't worry about it, I don't mind. I wouldn't have woken you but I've got to get to college this morning and you were kind of wrapped around me." She responded lightly and when he still refused to look at her she climbed out from under the covers and knelt over him, straddling his waist as she reached for his face and forced him to look at her.

"It's ok, really. Nothing to be embarrassed about." She told him before leaning down to press a chaste kiss to his lips, keeping his face cupped between her hands. When she pulled back she was smiling and he studied her face for signs she was lying to make him feel better but when he found none he shakily smiled back, still not quite trusting it but Bella seemed satisfied by the attempt at a smile at least as she let go of him and got up from the bed.

"I'll tell you a secret." She commented as she moved around to where she'd left her clothes in a pile by his drawers, "I liked waking up with you like that."

Edward was still far too clogged with sleep to fully get his head around what she'd just announced but as he watched her leave she paused at the door for just a moment, looking back at him with happy mischief sparkling in her eyes which allowed his guilt to ease just a little.

Burrowing back into his covers, Edward moved just enough to plant himself face first into the pillow Bella had used, still not ready to face the day. It wasn't the same as having her there but it was better than nothing and as he lay there what she'd just said as well as her smile ran through his mind. The combination of the two and the memory of how he'd woken up span out and developed into other images. She'd said she liked it and it was enough to give his sleepy thoughts free reign. He wanted to wake up curled around her again, wondered what it would feel like without the barrier of his t-shirt in the way.

Her skin would be softer than the fabric was and her scent would be stronger without his mixed in between.

His body started to react to his thoughts and the instant he recognised the feeling it was gone as his dreaming was suddenly cut off. Groaning with frustration he rolled onto his back, removing himself from the tempting smell.

It still didn't feel right and he didn't understand it.

He loved Bella, loved spending time with her, loved kissing her and loved the moments they got carried away. Considering how comfortable he was around her he thought the more intimate side of things would follow yet he still couldn't even think about it without freaking himself out. Bella certainly didn't seem to have a problem with those kinds of thoughts if her reaction that morning was anything to go by so he really didn't get why she was sticking with him. He was just going to disappoint and frustrate her in the long run.

Rubbing his hands over his face he sighed. Thoughts like those weren't going to get him very far and he could just imagine Bella telling him off for being too hard on himself if he voiced them. Glancing to the clock he found it was half six. Lucy wouldn't be up for a while yet and the rest of the house would be just as quiet. He didn't usually get up until Lucy came in to wake him as she left for school but now he was awake and Bella wasn't staying he didn't see the point in staying in bed. He wouldn't be able to sleep.

Struggling into his chair wasn't as difficult as it had been. The cast wasn't even as awkward to move as he was beginning to get used to it and it certainly helped that his shoulder was getting stronger. His ribs still ached with the movement and the pain in his abdomen was a sharp stabbing sensation as the movements pulled the healing wound reminding him the first stop would definitely be the kitchen for his pills. With that in mind, he headed to the door and pulled it open only for Bella to tumble through it and land in his lap.

"Oh, hello!" She said a little breathlessly as she scrambled to get back up right but he grabbed hold of her once she'd righted herself a little and held her where she was.

"Hello, what were you doing falling through my door?" He asked with amusement, his previous thoughts wiped away for the moment as he concentrated on how she was blushing from her clumsiness displaying itself – he loved it.

"Well I was leaning against it trying to put my shoe on." She stated, waving the converse in question in front of his face as he hadn't noticed it in her hand before, "But you decided to open the door. What are you doing out of bed? It's far too early to be up if you don't need to be."

"I was already awake, not much point staying in bed."

"I thought you were too comfy to get up?" She teased as she managed to get out of his arms and over to the bed to put her shoe on.

"Well I was until you got up. Now it's just not the same." He grumbled, wishing he'd been able to stay in the lovely, slightly unaware state that let him enjoy being cuddled up to his girlfriend or at least daydreaming of it.

Bella seemed to catch a little of his melancholy as shoe now on, she joined him again in search of a kiss.

"I'm sorry, I wish I could have stayed but I've really got to get to college. I can come over tonight for a while if you want though." She offered once she'd pulled back.

"Are you sure? You don't have college work you need to do?" He asked trying not to show just how much he wanted her to come back so she wouldn't feel like she had to but she smiled and shook her head letting him enjoy the idea of it rather than feeling guilty for monopolizing all her time.

"Nothing I can't bring over here, it shouldn't take too long." She said before getting serious, "Are you going to be ok today after last night?"

Edward's mood darkened instantly with the reminder of why she'd stayed over. He knew he hadn't wanted to wake up that morning and her words reminded him why. He wasn't ready to deal with everything that had been revealed the night before, not that there was much that could be done about it anyway. Obviously though, they were all going to expect him to want to talk about it but he didn't know what they'd want him to say. What exactly could he say? His father hated him enough to see him dead and the man who wanted to kill him was clever enough to stand a good chance at getting another shot of it in the not too distant future. That didn't even cover the part where they'd cast enough doubt on him to get his daughter taken away from him and the sad fact that he'd been the indirect cause of the black eye his mother was now sporting and her ruined marriage. He wasn't sure there actually were words suitable for describing just how messed up the whole thing was or the turmoil of emotions it stirred up within him yet it was exactly the kind of thing he'd been expecting all along. He knew the Cullen's taking him in and things going well with Bella had been too much to ask for. He just wasn't meant to be happy like that.

"I'm fine." He answered Bella and the long stare she levelled him with let him know she saw right through him even if she didn't have time to comment on it.

"Ok then, well I'll see you later tonight and remember Esme's willing to listen if you need someone to talk to before then. Bottling things up doesn't help." She said before leaning down for one more kiss. When she pulled back she kept her hands cupped around his face and stared into his eyes so he couldn't doubt the sincerity of her next words.

"I love you."

"I love you too." He responded quietly so she released him, happy that he was seeing the emotion in her eyes as it was reflected in his own. Stepping back, she grabbed her bag which had been dropped by his door and left, turning to wave when she'd reached the front door since Edward had moved into the corridor to watch her go. He waved back and then she was gone, seemingly taking all the happy emotions with her so with a sigh he headed for the kitchen.

At least the painkillers would make the physical pains feel better.

* * *

><p>Edward was still sitting in the kitchen when Alice and Emmett appeared, mid argument.<p>

"You can't say it's not weird! You know as well as I do that she never sends text messages."

"I know, and that's not what I'm saying. It is weird but what does it matter? Neither of us want to go home anyway."

"That's not point! Aren't you even a little concerned about Mum?" Alice argued only for them both to fall silent the minute they stepped into the room and saw Edward sitting off to the side by the rarely used small kitchen table that sat in the bay window.

"Don't stop arguing on my account." He muttered, feeling them both staring at him. He'd already heard enough to be able to figure out who they were arguing about and he wasn't thankful for the extra reminder of the night before.

"Edward we're sorry, it's just, Mum's acting a little odd." Alice started only for Emmett to hiss at her to shut up, sure that Edward would not want to hear anything about their mother.

"I'm guessing Esme didn't talk to you last night then?" Edward commented anyway, turning a little so he could see them both. Alice was still dressed in her pyjamas, her hair sticking out in all directions like normal although it looked a little more bed head than styled for a change. Emmett was in suit trousers and shirt although the tie and jacket he used to wear for work were missing. It didn't surprise Edward that Esme was a little less strict on the dress code than their father. Both of them were by the units ready to find breakfast although Edward seemed to have distracted them as they stared at him.

"What do you mean?" Emmett questioned uneasily.

"Mum was here last night." Edward answered trying to ignore the way that made them look at him with a mix of fear and pity. He might not have liked seeing her there but he hated how they all had a tendency to walk on egg shells around him. Just because he didn't necessarily like something didn't mean he couldn't cope with it and if they were looking at him like that after only hearing she'd visited then he didn't want to know how they'd react around him to the rest of it.

"Why?" Alice managed to ask so Edward turned away to stare out of the window again, not wanting to see their reaction.

"To warn us. Dad's planning to represent James. They've got it all explained away like I'm the bad guy. They'll take Lucy away and James will be free. Mum's trying to stop him. She had a black eye although she said it was part of the plan."

"Dad's planning to do what?" Emmett shouted at the same time Alice turned on him.

"I told you there was something wrong with Mum!"

"Alice that's seriously not what is important right now." Emmett hissed making her scowl at him.

"He said she had a black eye, Dad hurt her. How's that not important?" She asked angrily.

"Err did you miss the part about Dad representing James? You know...the guy who tried to _kill_ your brother?" He retaliated.

Edward didn't bother paying attention to their bickering after that. One glance over showed them both to be gesturing wildly at each other as their tempers flared and he just couldn't be bothered with it. At least it had distracted them from focusing on him as he found himself reflecting on what had been said about his father's feelings towards him, their raised voices reminding him of when they were younger.

He'd always been quieter than the pair of them. He had a temper, it seemed to be an inherited trait considering the state of his mother's face the night before, but his was slower to show itself. Emmett and Alice flew into disagreements over petty, stupid things whereas Edward was more reserved. He had to be really pushed for it to flare up, something Emmett seemed to have gained a real knack for doing.

Before, he'd always thought the difference was just down to their ages. Being the middle child never seemed to help when trying to win an argument as Emmett being the oldest had more authority and Alice being the youngest automatically got her own way more often than not as no one wanted to upset her. Knowing how his father really felt about him though showed a whole different level to it. When they were young they had fought with each other a lot. Usually over toys, or Emmett playing too rough and when fights got particularly bad they were invariably sent to their father who had always seemed to side with his brother or sister. It had never mattered what the cause of the problem was or what Edward tried to say about it, it always ended up being his fault. Being a quick learner his quieter disposition had developed. Rather than risk getting in to trouble he'd started to prefer to play by himself and when he'd got a little older he'd found solace in his piano since neither of his siblings cared for it.

He could hide away for hours practising and nobody would bother him apart from his mother who was the one to originally teach him how to play. He'd always liked spending that time with her alone and it had probably been one of the major draws to his enthusiasm for it when he'd first started out. It had been special to them and the fact his father had had no interest in it had just been an added bonus as he grew. It was the one area in his life where there weren't any expectations to be met although the memory of the happiness that used to bring was tainted as he realised that it hadn't been the piano his dad hadn't cared for but the son who'd chosen to play it.

There were more clues to his father's hatred that he could see looking back on it. He had never shown an interest in anything he did. Emmett had always complained that he got it easy as their father kept a much closer eye on him while Edward could pretty much fly under the radar. He still got in trouble if his grades weren't perfect and the shouting would be much worse, the words harsher the few times it happened but for Emmett it had been a constant watch. Ed was far too interested and involved in everything he did, stating which subjects he should study, what sports he should play and checking the grades on every piece of homework. Once again Edward had just assumed it was down to their ages, Emmett being older was always doing something that seemed so much more important than what Edward was doing at any given time but now he could see it was more than that.

Their father had never showed his face at a single event Edward was part of. Not the piano recitals, the school concerts or prize givings. His mother had always been there along with Alice and Emmett if they could be but his father had always had to work. It had made sense at the time as he had a time consuming job yet he had still managed to show his face at Emmett's sporting events or Alice's school plays. Searching through his memories Edward couldn't think of a single time his father had been there for him, all he could think of were the harsh words and the feeling of needing to stay out of his way and not draw attention to himself.

He had never been left alone through favouritism like Emmett had believed; his father just simply hadn't cared about him. So long as he wasn't doing something wrong that would look bad to people Ed had no interest in him whatsoever. He hadn't wanted him and hadn't even bothered trying or pretending to care.

Emmett and Alice were still arguing and with the revelations Edward had just come to he couldn't stand the incessant background noise any longer. Leaving his window he pushed himself out of the kitchen, neither Emmett nor Alice noticed him move, too caught up in glaring at each other with red faces, so he was left in piece to seek out the one person who never failed to calm him down and cheer him up.

He tried to be careful when opening Lucy's door but being in the chair made it awkward so he was glad she was a heavy sleeper by the time he was inside her room after clipping the door loudly with the chair. Thankfully Lucy had carefully left the floor clear, always conscious of what her daddy needed so he didn't have any further problems getting to the side of her bed.

She was curled up on her side with her favourite teddy bear in her arms, her hair all over the place and the covers twisted around her. He reached out to brush her hair away from her face then let his fingers lightly drift over the smooth, soft skin of her cheek. Even in her sleep her lips twitched into a small smile, apparently aware of his touch and he felt the calmness he'd been looking for wash over him.

Watching her sleep so peacefully, he silently promised himself and her that he'd never make her feel the way he did when he thought of his parents. She'd always know how much he loved her and when the day came that she did ask about Jessica he would tell her that she'd loved her too. It didn't matter what she'd done to him as that had no real bearing on how she would have felt about her child and he wouldn't take that away from Lucy. He'd tell her what Riley had told him, that she had loved her but just hadn't been well enough to take care of her so she'd done what she thought was best for her no matter how hard it had been. It wouldn't be the same as having a mother she could see and spend time with but at least she would know she'd always been loved. He'd even give her the necklace Jessica had wanted her to have and go through the pictures with her so she'd have no doubts and he'd hug her tight and explain that it didn't matter that Jessica wasn't there as she would always love her and she would always have him.

She would never have to doubt whether she was loved or even worthy of it and she'd never have to struggle to try and make him proud of her. She'd always know she was loved and he'd make sure she knew how proud he was of her every day.

Edward had only been sitting watching Lucy sleep for a few minutes more when her door opened and Carlisle stepped into the room carrying a glass of juice. He looked liked he'd been dragged from bed before he was ready. Still dressed in pyjamas covered by a deep blue dressing gown with bare feet and his hair sticking up in random directions he looked a lot younger than he usually did in his impeccable shirts and trousers. Judging by his bleary eyes he really had only just got out of bed and Edward idly wondered why he'd bothered getting up so early after the long shift he'd worked the day before.

"Esme said it's time Lucy was up to get ready for school." He murmured as he passed the glass of juice to Edward and fought a yawn.

"Thanks, I'll wake her in a minute." He said before watching Carlisle loose the battle against yawning, "Why are you up so early? Didn't you work late last night?"

"I did but I woke up with Esme's alarm and figured I ought to find out what the ruckus in the kitchen was over since I was awake anyway."

"Oh, they're still arguing then?" Edward asked feeling a little annoyed at them for disturbing Carlisle. They'd been kind enough to take them all in so it seemed rude for them to be disturbing him from his much needed sleep.

"Not anymore, Esme's sorting them out. She told me what happened last night by the way, how are you doing with it all?" He asked so Edward shrugged. He didn't really have an answer for that yet so he tried to brush it off.

"I'm fine." He muttered but he could tell Carlisle saw through that the same way Bella had so he was grateful when he didn't push for a proper answer and just moved on.

"Ok well I'm not in work until this evening so we were going to take a proper look through the files your mother left after everyone's out for the day if you'd like to join us."

"Ok." Edward answered shortly. He didn't really want to read over the lies they'd constructed but he knew if he wanted to have any chance at surviving James then he'd have to understand what exactly he was up against. It still didn't sound like a fun activity for the day though.

"Good, it'll be best if we know exactly what's going on. I'll leave you to wake Lucy but before I go I just want you to know that I'm really glad you've decided to stay with us. It means a lot to us so thank you. I really hope you'll be happy here." He said, lightly gripping Edward's uninjured shoulder before leaving them alone muttering something about going back to bed as he went.

Having watched Carlisle leave, Edward turned back to Lucy and sat her juice down on the bedside cabinet before reaching over and gently shaking her shoulder.

"Time to wake up Luce." He told her and he saw her eyes scrunch up indicating she was reluctantly waking before she rolled away from him, tugging the covers over her head.

"That's not going to work, you've got school to get to baby." He chuckled, pulling the cover back off her and she grumbled something before she suddenly rolled back over and her eyes shot open, lighting up as they focussed on him.

"Daddy!" She cheered, pushing herself up onto her knees so she could scramble over to him and he leaned back, letting her climb onto his knee.

"Morning baby." He murmured, wrapping his arms around her and nuzzling into her hair as she wound her arms around his neck and hugged him back.

"You're up early." She commented which was true as it was the first time since they'd arrived at the Cullen's that he'd been awake before her.

"Uhuh, I wanted a hug." He told her so she squeezed him tighter before pulling back so she could look at his face properly.

"Are you ok?" She asked and he could feel her looking for the minute signs she found so easily in his expression and wished that for once she wouldn't spot them.

"I'm fine honey. Can't I just want a hug from my baby?" He responded and she smiled softly letting him off the hook of her assessment as she melted at the continued use of his pet names for her.

"I like hugs." She said.

"I know you do. It's time to get ready for school now though sweetheart. You get dressed and I'll be in the kitchen." He told her so still happy that he was there she kissed his cheek before carefully getting down and doing as she was told.

Emmett and Alice were nowhere to be seen when Edward returned to the kitchen. Esme was at the units getting things ready for breakfast while Carlisle was sitting at the table in front of the window with a cup of coffee in front of him.

"I thought you were going back to bed." Edward commented as he joined him at the table noticing that one of the chairs had been moved out of the way to give him space.

"I was, but then I smelt breakfast and it was too good to miss." He answered and Edward found himself agreeing as he realised Esme was making pancakes. There was already a bowl of cut fruit on the table along with some syrup and a large carton of plain yoghurt.

"Does Lucy always get this kind of breakfast before school?" He asked to which Carlisle shrugged and Esme smiled.

"Not every day." She said although Edward got the impression it was probably more often than not.

"You'll spoil her." He warned.

"Yup, I intend to spoil the both of you. I thought you already knew that." She commented lightly making Edward roll his eyes as he knew that was one argument he didn't stand a chance of winning especially since he found he didn't really want to argue with her over it anymore anyway.

"What did you do with Emmett and Alice?" He asked instead making her smile vanish.

"Emmett is on his way to work and Alice is getting ready for school. I'll be talking to them this evening." She said and before the conversation could plummet any further Lucy skipped in dressed in her school uniform and headed straight for Edward's lap.

"Can you do my hair?" She asked once she'd carefully climbed up and settled down cuddling into his chest. He could see she'd got her hairbrush clutched in one hand and he smiled at how happy the possibility of the return of their old routines made her.

"Course I can honey, how do you want it?"

"Plaits!"

Her enthusiasm made him wonder just how much having her hair left loose had annoyed her while under the care of Emmett. After promising her he'd do her hair as asked once they'd had breakfast she turned around to face the table and set the brush down. Esme brought the pancakes over and Edward helped Lucy fill her plate before he got his own.

Edward had fun being part of getting Lucy ready for school again. It settled him in a way he hadn't realised he needed and by the time she was following Esme out to her car after having given him the last of many hugs that morning he was in a much better mood. It was much easier to push aside the issues with his father when he had Lucy in front of him, smiling at him like he was her entire world and reminding him that he didn't need the man who had done nothing to ever to earn the title of dad in the first place. He'd never even really missed him either so it seemed stupid to be upset over him especially as in many ways it had been a relief to be away from him. If he could have kept his mother and his siblings he would have been perfectly happy not being part of his father's life so he was determined that he wasn't going to care what Edward Senior thought of him any longer. He'd wasted enough time on trying to make him proud already.

His focus really needed to be on James anyway and as Carlisle, who had perked up considerably after his coffee and pancakes announced he was going to go and get dressed so they could sit down with Esme after she got home to go over everything, Edward decided to do the same.

Showering was an interesting experience since he'd returned from hospital. It was a lot less embarrassing now he'd got the hang of moving around by himself as it meant he no longer needed Carlisle's help but it was still awkward. The cast couldn't get wet so he had to make sure it was covered before he could even get in and once in instead of being able to enjoy the shower which was so much more powerful than the one in his flat he found he had to try and get done as fast as he could before his body gave out on him. He could stand for a little while, balancing awkwardly with the bulk of the cast but his leg tired quickly so it was better if he used the seat Carlisle and Esme had installed in the shower for him but sitting down didn't cure the protests of his shoulder, ribs and abdomen as he moved to wash himself.

Still, it was getting slightly better every day which was encouraging.

He joined Carlisle back in the kitchen by the table where they settled in to wait for Esme. The file Elizabeth had left behind was sitting in front of Carlisle and Edward's eyes were drawn to it. He was fairly certain he didn't want to see what was inside it but he needed to if he hoped to keep himself and Lucy not only safe but together. Carlisle did try to distract him but the questions about how he was feeling and what was hurting had become so routine that Edward didn't really need to pay attention to answer them so he got up to make more coffee instead.

The movement did catch Edward's eye and finally pulled his gaze away from the folder so he tried to pay a little more attention to Carlisle. He still looked vaguely sleepy as he was dressed down in jeans and a t-shirt. It was unusual from what Edward had seen so far of the Cullen's and he wondered if it was a sign they were starting to relax around him. He hoped it was as he decided he liked the more relaxed Carlisle, it reminded him of Garrett.

"I spoke to Garrett last night." Carlisle suddenly announced making Edward smile a little as it was like he could read his thoughts for a moment, "He's going to come round later and he's bringing some of the paper work from the shop with him. He thought you might like to start learning the ropes as he said he was sure you'd be going mad by now with nothing to do."

"Really?" Edward questioned, feeling a little excited at the prospect. It would be good to feel like he was doing something productive again.

"Yeah, I told him it should be ok. You're doing a lot better with your medication so he shouldn't put you to sleep." Carlisle joked as he was enjoying seeing Edward smiling again and he knew that was sure to vanish as soon as they started going over the file.

"It wouldn't put me to sleep. I like learning stuff." He responded as he'd been really looking forward to starting his training for the promotion. He was just glad he didn't have to wait until he was back at the shop as that was still at least a month away from happening.

"Emmett told Esme that you were good at school. Would you ever want to go back to college or university?" Carlisle asked making Edward frown a little before he shook his head. It wasn't something he'd ever really thought about since Lucy appeared and although he had sometimes wondered what it would have been like, it wasn't who he was anymore.

"I don't think so. I'm happy at the shop if Garrett's happy keeping me around."

"No worries there, he definitely is. The option is there though if you wanted it, we'd help you." Carlisle continued wanting Edward to know that all the restrictions he'd previously been living under no longer applied. They wanted to help him achieve whatever he wanted from life and would be there for him in any way he needed. .

"I'd rather spend the time school work would take up playing with Lucy. " Edward answered honestly. He didn't want to miss out on a single moment of her life and taking on something as time consuming as college failed to hold any appeal to him. So long as he could provide for Lucy he was happy with his job, he enjoyed it and while he'd struggled for money before, his new promotion would solve that even without the Cullens taking them in.

"I can't blame you for that. I'm pretty sure most of us would rather spend our time with her than doing work of any kind." Carlisle commented which made Edward smile a little as he was certain it was true. Lucy had got everyone in the house wrapped around her little finger and she was enjoying every minute of it. It was good to see her interacting with them all so easily after the years of it just being the pair of them. She could have so easily felt ill at ease around so many people and he was glad she hadn't learnt that trait from him.

When Esme arrived home, everything was fairly calm in the kitchen, something which soon changed when she joined them at the table and Carlisle opened the file. He took out the written statement on the top and began to read while Esme spread out the photos across the table top. Edward felt his anger stir as more and more photos were uncovered showing the worn interior of his flat and their daily treks to school and work. As Esme pulled out a couple of photos to look at more closely he felt the panic grip him as he saw the photo of him leaving the flat block on his own and another of Lucy doing the same. Just seeing Lucy out on her own like that made him feel sick even knowing that she'd survived the trip ok.

Reaching out, Edward shifted through a few of the photos and uncovered some obviously taken the day he'd been late to the school gates, there were several of Lucy standing with Bella and Anna and one of him hurrying to the gates looking terrible.

"What happened there?" Esme asked as she glanced up to see the way he was eying those pictures with a look of disgust on his face.

"I was late. It was just after I came down with the flu and I overslept." He muttered, and in his peripheral vision he saw Carlisle sit the paper down he was reading as he looked up to them.

"And what about these?" Esme questioned, sitting the two photos she'd picked up down so he could see them better.

"The one of me is just before the first time they hurt me. Lucy was asleep in the flat after being ill and I was heading out to get food. I was only meant to be gone half an hour or so. The one of Lucy is from when she went to get Garrett from the shop. I was unconscious when she left the flat." He answered uneasily.

"According to this," Carlisle said indicating the statement he'd been reading, "They're using all of those instances as evidence you weren't taking good enough care of Lucy."

"Well I guess they'd be right really. I shouldn't have left her on her own and she shouldn't have needed to go out on her own like that." Edward sighed, sinking his head into his hands and gripping at his hair. He couldn't see how they'd get around that as it was the truth and no matter what the circumstances were she should never have been on her own like that.

"Everyone makes mistakes and there wasn't a lot you could do about falling ill. They'd need more than just this to make that kind of accusation stick." Carlisle countered, "We can prove that she's well cared for now and will continue to be so, so I think you should be ok on that front. The rest of it, it's not great but if James can't get a good enough lawyer he might have trouble getting anyone to believe him."

Esme continued to talk quietly to Carlisle and Edward heard vague comments about James' medical history and options for character references and witness statements but his attention was still fixed on the photos. It didn't matter what Carlisle and Esme thought, he couldn't risk them being wrong and losing Lucy. Staring at the photos he knew that if his mother was unsuccessful, there was only one thing he could do that would keep them alive and together.

Run.

It wasn't something he wanted to do, but he knew he had to be ready for it. He couldn't lose Lucy and he couldn't fight James so it was the only option. They'd run and he'd ask Bella to join them as she wouldn't be safe from James either, not after the way she'd hurt him though if she didn't want to go he'd accept it and just hope that James' hunger for destroying him would make him leave her alone in favour of hunting him down. It would hurt to lose Bella like that but he didn't want to destroy her life or make her do anything she didn't want so he'd just have to learn to deal with the resultant broken heart over time. Leaving Esme, Carlisle and Garrett behind would also be hard but he'd managed to get himself on his feet before when he'd been a lot less prepared so he knew they'd be ok.

Besides, there wasn't any choice. He wasn't going to let James take him away from Lucy. He had promises to uphold.

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><p><em>AN - I'm sorry for the long wait between chapters. I did post a note onto my profile to explain what was happening but for those who didn't find it, my boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me. That's resulted in me needing to find a new place to live. I have a flat sorted with my sister now, but we won't have the internet up and running in it until next month. Because of that I wanted to get this chapter out to you before I move out and loose internet so I apologise for it not being quite the chapter I had intended it to be, with my head being a little all over the place finding the right frame of mind to settle down to write has been a little awkward. <em>

_I hope it's ok, and I apologise again for the long wait inbetween chapters. _

_As always, thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and to all of you for sparing the time to read it, I appreciate it :)_


	50. Chapter 48 Ghosts That We Knew

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer and the chapter title comes from a Mumford & Sons song.

_AN - It's back! Sorry this has taken so long, I kept trying to get back into it but it just hasn't worked until now. It's taken a while to talk myself into posting this too, I still have no idea if its actually any good or not but after having several people messaging me asking if I'd be finishing it or not I thought I ought to at least try (thank you for those messages by the way, they were what re-inspired me). If any one who did read this before is still reading it now then thank you as well and I hope I don't disappoint you._

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><p><strong>Chapter 48 – Ghosts That We Knew<strong>

Edward remained at the table poring over the files long after Esme and Carlisle. They'd both noticed straight away that he was not finding any comfort at all in any of the counter arguments they were coming up with for the negative view of him the photographs and statements portrayed and while they did not want to leave him worrying over things they felt were unnecessary they had learnt enough about him to realize when he would prefer to be left alone. They had already exhausted every possible complication or solution they could see arising from the files anyway so there was nothing else they could do to reassure Edward, they just had to hope they'd eventually be proven right and that Edward would let their assurances filter through after thinking it all over for a while. Sitting there by himself however all Edward was doing was rereading the written statements and seeing all too well how James could convince a jury even without Edward Senior's help as his medical history was laid out for everyone to see, giving him the perfect alibi. Even with admitting to the attack that had almost killed Edward, James' medical records proved him to be diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder, and if left untreated, the symptoms lead to aggressive, violent behavior and a total disregard for the safety or rights of others which as far as Edward could see, described James' actions perfectly. With James stating he had stopped taking his medication after Jessica's death it gave him an excellent shot at the diminished culpability plea as his statement read that after going back on his medication in the hospital, he was sorry for what he'd done and would never have let it happen had he been in his right mind. Having received both Riley and his mother's warnings, it was clear that last statement was a complete lie but to an unbiased jury Edward was sure even the most basic of legal representation could make a pretty convincing argument.

With a sigh, he eventually gathered up all the photos and papers and pushed them back into their file and out of sight. Staring at them would do no more good; he just had to hope that his mother's plan would work and that Carlisle and Esme were right with their assurances that everything would be ok. With thoughts of his mother and what she was trying to do still on his mind, he headed towards the entertainment room in search of a distraction but once there he found that instead of going for the T.V. or games consoles like he'd taken to doing most days his attention was drawn to the piano. The dust cover had been removed once it had been tuned and though Edward had found it easy enough to ignore due to its position behind the sofa, seeing his mother and the current unrest of his thoughts enabled the natural draw he felt to the instrument to break through.

Before Lucy the piano had been his go to method for dealing with stress. No matter what the problem had been, as soon as his fingers touched the keys everything else but the music just drifted away. He could sit and play for hours and when he stopped his mind would be clearer and either a solution for what had bothered him was usually much easier to find or he could just let go of the negative emotions that had plagued him and carry on as if nothing had ever been wrong. When Lucy came along, the loss of the piano had been part of what made it all so hard. He couldn't just sit down and let everything go like he'd been used to. Instead all the worries, questions, hurt and anger had circled round and round his mind until it had all become too much and he'd snapped causing him to block it all and push it to the side instead of dealing with it, allowing him to just concentrate on Lucy and what he needed to do for her. In a way she had then become his coping method. He found comfort in her presence and a sense of calmness when things were getting too much as so long as he was doing everything he could for her then whatever else he was struggling with didn't really matter. He could see now how detrimental that had been to him and while he knew everyone was keen for him to talk to someone rather than bottling things up and ignoring them he wasn't quite ready to do that yet and the piano was a much more tempting option.

Without even realizing he'd decided to, Edward found he was making the difficult transition from his wheelchair and onto the piano bench. Once he had got his leg as comfortable as possible he ran his hand along the smooth, black glossy surface feeling a slight ghost of the old comfort it used to bring him before it was chased away by the painful memories that had made him act so negatively on first seeing it in the room.

Elizabeth had been the one to first teach him to play and some of his happiest childhood memories were of sitting side by side on the piano bench as she gave him his first lessons. Unfortunately he'd found the happiest memories were also the most painful as they were just a reminder of what he'd lost. The lure of the instrument however was too great now that he was sitting in front of it so lifting the cover he let his fingers splay out across the keys before pulling them sharply back as he was slammed by the perfect mental image of his mother's proud smile as she'd watched him play. Whenever he'd disappeared into the piano room it had never taken her long to drift in and he used to find her presence reassuring, helping him to believe he could master any particularly tricky part that had tried to elude him. It had been their own quiet little world, one where Edward Senior's harsh words and strict expectations failed to penetrate, where Emmett's loud voice and personality couldn't overshadow and where Alice could never steal the centre of attention. He'd loved that time. Loved it so much it was almost enough to force him away from the piano as the pain of the reality that he'd never get to feel that way again dissolved his memories. It wouldn't be the same without her, couldn't be, she was such an intrinsic part of it all. Without her the music would mean nothing, just notes on a page. It struck him as odd that all he felt in response was sadness and as he thought about it a little more he realized that none of the anger he usually felt when thinking of his family was present when thinking of his mother. Even when he'd entered the kitchen the night before and she'd been standing there none of the fury he was so used to feeling was there, instead all he'd felt was fear and then concern when he'd registered the black eye. He hoped she was ok. Having been on the receiving end of violence he wouldn't have wished it on anyone and the fact she'd allowed herself to be hurt in an attempt to help him didn't sit very well with him. It confused him too as it didn't really make much sense why she'd go to such extremes after doing nothing in the past. She'd said she had her reasons, and he guessed he could understand why she'd have thought him to be better off away from his father but her abandonment had hurt more than anything else. He didn't know if he could ever forgive that but as his finger lightly pressed down on just one of the ivory keys he didn't realize it but he already had. If she had been there right that moment, as the music came back to him, he would have welcomed her and let it carry him away.

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><p>Esme stood by the open door to the entertainment room, listening as Edward played. It wasn't smooth, his fingers stumbling over notes he hadn't played for too long but the emotion the music was riddled with made the flaws unimportant. She felt Carlisle's arms slide around her waist from behind and leant back against his chest but didn't pull her gaze away from Edward.<p>

"He'll be ok." Carlisle murmured quietly as he too listened to the hauntingly beautiful song Edward was creating. It was full of the harsh anger and pain they knew he was all too familiar with and it was clear it wasn't a piece he had learnt but was instead something that was coming from within him. He was finally letting his emotions out and Carlisle couldn't have been happier to see it. They'd done everything they could for him physically and he was sure this was a step in the right direction mentally.

"I know." She responded even though she was choked up with the emotion as the notes rose to a crescendo before finally breaking into a more peaceful melody and Edward's shoulders relaxed a little even if there was a slight longing underlying the notes. He was strong, had proved himself to be capable of surviving and now that he was letting go of the tight hold he had on his emotions she knew as well as Carlisle did that he would recover. Now that he was accepting their help as well, they'd both do everything they could to make sure of that but it was still painful to witness the pain he'd had to endure in the years he'd been on his own. He should never have had to go through any of it.

"Come on, let's leave him to it. Garrett will be here soon." Carlisle encouraged as it was clear Edward was coming to the end of what he was playing. He didn't want him to discover them watching as he was sure that whatever it was he was playing, it was going to be very private to him and he didn't want anything to discourage him from finding solace in the piano again. Esme nodded, and allowed Carlisle to steer her towards the kitchen, where after quickly wiping her eyes, she started to gather the ingredients to prepare lunch.

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><p>"I should have had you doing this years ago!" Garrett chuckled as he sat beside Edward, watching him steadily work his way through the shop's books.<p>

He had carted round the majority of the paperwork that needed doing along with the laptop he used to keep record of it all and had quickly discovered that Edward was a natural at it. Sorting through all his invoices and receipts along with the shop's takings usually took Garrett hours and he hated every second of it. Edward however had taken it all with a look of excitement and had quickly had it all sorted and ready for entering into the spreadsheets Garrett used. He hadn't even needed any instructions on how to work those, just a brief overview of what they were used for and he seemed to know exactly what he was doing.

It was somewhat baffling to Garrett to watch Edward take so easily to something he found so difficult. He had been expecting to have to spend a fair amount of time teaching Edward the ins and outs of what needed to be done and how to go about it yet he seemed to just naturally understand what was needed. He could see his life getting a lot easier considering the smile on Edward's face as he worked and he loved it.

"Well Emmett did tell us he was a quick learner." Carlisle commented from his spot in the chair where he'd chosen to observe for the afternoon. He'd been curious to see just how Edward would do with it all and he'd certainly blown away any expectations they'd had. He couldn't help but think it really was a shame he hadn't been able to pursue his education past high school even if he could understand his reluctance to return to it.

"I like this kind of thing. It makes sense." Edward commented absently, still absorbed in what he was doing. It felt good to actually be doing something useful again as there was nothing worse than the restlessness being ill had caused him; he didn't like spending his days doing nothing.

"Good, that makes my life easier, I hate it." Garrett replied and the only response from Edward was a slight twitch to his smile as one side lifted higher than the other showing his amusement.

"You better not be tiring him out Garrett or you'll have Lucy to answer to when she gets home." Esme warned as she paused in the doorway on her way out to pick Lucy up.

"He's fine Esme, seems to actually be enjoying himself." Garrett responded cheerfully making Esme smile as she looked over to Edward to see that did indeed seem to be the case. It was good to see him in good spirits again after how disheartened he'd been that morning and how quiet he'd been during lunch after his emotional piano playing.

"Ok then, make sure it stays that way. Will you be joining us for dinner Garrett?" She asked.

"If you don't mind, I'd love to. You know I'll never pass up one of your meals."

"And you know you're always welcome. I better get going now; don't want to leave Lucy waiting."

"Is it that time already?" Edward asked in surprise as his head shot up and he glanced at Esme who was smiling at him as she nodded. He was usually well aware of the time when it reached the afternoon having spent most of his days waiting impatiently for it to be time for Lucy to come home but Garrett really had very successfully distracted him.

"It is, and I really had better get going. We'll be back soon." She said before heading out, leaving Edward with an even bigger smile on his face as he returned to what he was doing, determined to get it finished before Lucy arrived.

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><p>Lucy charged for Edward as soon as she was in the door so he was thankful Garrett's laptop had already been shut down and put away, the work finished shortly before they'd heard Esme's car pull up outside.<p>

"Missed you Daddy!"

"I missed you too sweetheart, was school ok?"

"Yup, we were practicing for sports day. You'll be able to come won't you?" She asked, pulling back to look at him hopefully only to be disappointed when she saw the uneasy look in his eyes. She'd known there was a strong chance that he wouldn't be allowed to go but he'd been looking so much better that she'd thought he might be able to.

"He'll be there Luce." Carlisle interrupted their conversation and was rewarded with the site of their identical happy smiles. Bella had already informed them of the date of sports day well aware that Edward would want to be there and with the steady progress Edward was making Carlisle was confident that he'd be up to the excursion in a couple of weeks time. He was eating well and gaining weight at a steady rate so he was hopeful that would have bolstered his immune system enough.

Knowing that her daddy would be there set Lucy off on a tangent as she cheerfully told them all about the practicing they'd been doing at school and what races were going to be involved. Edward followed it all perfectly, almost as excited about it as she was and everyone else just watched the pair in fond amusement.

A loud knock on the door announced Bella's arrival shortly before dinner time. Carlisle answered the door and when she followed him through to the entertainment room it was just Edward and Garrett there. They were talking about something to do with the shop and though Edward was smiling, Bella wasn't sure she trusted it as she could still remember the melancholy she'd seen in him that morning. As soon as she stepped into the room Edward's attention snapped to her so Garrett and Carlisle excused themselves to the kitchen to give them some time alone.

"Where's Lucy?" Bella asked as she walked over to join him on the sofa, realizing she wasn't there.

"Helping Esme make dinner, we're eating early tonight as Carlisle has got the evening shift." He explained, happy that she had no arguments about settling down beside him once she'd dropped her bag to the floor. Once there she leaned in for a kiss he was all too happy to deepen but she pulled back to study him. Now she was closer she could see he looked a lot better than she had been anticipating all day, there was a peacefulness to him that had never been there before making his earlier smile seem convincing. The fact Lucy wasn't glued to his side suggested that she had seen no signs of anything being wrong with him as well but given the circumstances, she just wasn't sure how that could possibly be true. What they'd been told last night had to have been devastating to him and while she knew he was good at hiding how he was really feeling, there was usually some kind of indication of what was going on with him when Lucy wasn't there to look for it.

"How's your day been?" She asked and he knew straight away that she was looking for signs of how he was dealing with the news his mother had brought but after a much better afternoon he wasn't quite ready to go back to the hard stuff yet.

"This afternoon's been good." He said with a smile in an attempt to distract her, "Garrett brought the shop's paperwork round and I've been going through it. It's fun, good to be doing something useful again too. Carlisle said I'm good to go to Lucy's sports day as well, she's incredibly excited."

Bella couldn't help but smile back at that knowing how true that would be and also glad that he'd had a good afternoon but it didn't escape her notice that that only covered half the day and though he wasn't lying, he was avoiding things. After spending most of her day worrying about him and still not convinced that he was doing as well as he appeared to be, she wasn't going to let it slide so easily even if he did seem cheerful.

"That's great news but did you talk to Esme and Carlisle this morning?"

"We went over all the files." He sighed in defeat seeing that Bella wasn't going to let him get away with just avoiding it and remembering that she had just as much right as anyone to know what was in those files anyway as after what she'd done to James her life would probably be just as dependant on James being locked up as his own.

"And?" Bella prompted seeing his reluctance to talk so talking hold of his hand but unable to quell her curiosity on the subject especially as she knew they wouldn't have much more time without Lucy there to hear every word that was said until she was in bed. After spending all day worrying over it she didn't think she could stand spending the evening doing the same especially while trying to pretend everything was fine for Lucy. Edward may have been a master at it but she didn't think she'd manage it.

"It is exactly as my mum described it. There are photos of me and Lucy on our own, inside our flat, at the school gates, the shops, basically everywhere. They've been following me for months. James has concocted a pretty convincing case against me and my ability to look after Lucy and he's stating that he stopped taking his medication for antisocial personality disorder after Jessica died so everything that has come since then has been due to that. Now they've got him back on the meds he's saying he is sorry and he regrets what he's done."

"Surely no one in their right mind would believe all those lies. What did Esme and Carlisle say about it all?" Bella asked, outraged that James could have come up with such a story, never mind that anyone could believe it or try to argue the case, especially Edward's own father. Seeing her anger he squeezed her hand lightly to try and calm her down knowing that she was going to like what he had to say next even less and that the anger wouldn't help, they needed clear heads to be able to think through it all rationally.

"He's got medical records to back him up, he has been officially diagnosed with a personality disorder and Carlisle and Esme both think it will be fine if my mother's plan works. They say no matter what that they won't let anyone take Lucy." He replied and although he seemed calm, Bella could see that he didn't believe them and tried to come up with something to say that would help reinforce what they must have already told him.

"You said they've been following you for months, and there are photos to back that up. That's not the work of someone not in control of their actions. Everything's been so well planned they can't possibly believe he didn't know what he was doing and I'm sure Esme and Carlisle are right, you've got people around you now to help so even if they did decide to look into how you cope with Lucy there is nothing to find other than a happy child surrounded by loving family."

"If they choose to believe James' story then Riley was behind all of the planning and James just followed along, doing as he was told and I know I'd have everyone behind me here but I can't take the risk, no matter how small it is, when it comes to Lucy." He countered, coming to the conclusion that although he had planned to wait until they had more time to talk about it properly once Lucy was in bed, he was going to have to tell Bella the plan he'd been thinking of all day. He just hoped she'd take it seriously and really think about it.

"What do you mean?" Bella questioned feeling uneasy at the resolve in Edward's words and the way he was staring at her. It was the same calculating look Lucy had when she was trying to figure something out about someone.

"If my mum's plan fails then I'm going to take the money she's left me and Lucy and we'll run. I can't risk him coming after us again and I know I have no right to ask this, but I want you to come with us." He explained, watching Bella closely and seeing the shock his words caused making him worry she'd turn him down without even thinking about it properly.

"What? How do you know that would even work? Where would we go? How would we get by and what about Esme and Carlisle? They wouldn't let you go." She spluttered after a moment but Edward had spent most the morning thinking about it and even after the piano had helped clear his head, as far as he could see it would be the only solution if James was free.

"It took James five years to track me down when I wasn't even trying to hide. Mom has given us more than enough money to get as far away as we want and to get ourselves set up. I've done it before on much less. Carlisle and Esme wouldn't know until we'd already left. We can't leave a trail for James to follow; no one could know what we were planning or where we were going." He responded and he could see Bella was still struggling to get her head around the idea he'd pretty much just dropped on her out of the blue so he was thankful that he could hear the voices in the kitchen getting louder as the door opened suggesting someone was going to be interrupting them shortly, "I know it's a lot to ask and that I have no right to ask you to just give up your life for me like this but if James is free then I have to keep Lucy safe no matter what. It's not just us he'll be after for revenge though, you'll be in danger too. I can't stand the thought of something happening to you and I really don't want to have to let you go if I don't have to, I love you and that's not something I ever thought I could feel for anyone other than Lucy. I'll understand if you can't come with us, I know it's asking a lot and I don't want to pressure you into this. It is entirely up to you but please just think about it."

Bella could do nothing but continue to stare at him as the entertainment room door burst open and Lucy skipped in, announcing dinner was ready. Edward quickly fielded her attention asking her what they were having allowing Bella a moment to compose herself so that when Lucy finally spotted her and rushed in for a hug all she saw was Bella's smile and not the turmoil her thoughts were in.

As they sat at the dinner table Bella found herself watching Edward and Lucy as they chatted to Esme, Carlisle and Garrett. They'd come a long way from the closed off father and daughter she'd first met. Even after what had to have been a troubling day for Edward considering the plan he had just revealed to her he seemed more at peace than she'd ever seen him. The conversation was flowing easily between them all and Lucy was happy, no sign of her worrying over Edward for once. They were both happy being part of the Cullen household and as Garrett filled Lucy in on how well her daddy had been doing with the shops paper work, she couldn't imagine them leaving all of that behind. It seemed beyond cruel that they could come so far just to have it all taken away from them if they ran but she could understand why Edward would feel the need to do so. In the end nothing else would matter to him other than Lucy's safety. He'd leave everything behind, including her if it came down to it, and while he would miss everyone, she knew he'd just get on with things and continue making the best life he could for Lucy. That knowledge probably should have hurt, knowing that if he had to, he would leave her behind but she also knew he meant it when he told her he loved her as they weren't just words he threw around carelessly and he had asked her to go with them, something even a few weeks ago he probably never would have even considered.

He'd let her into his and Lucy's life as much as he was able and she was thankful that he'd seen something in her that allowed him to do so. She didn't want to break the trust they'd built either and as she caught Edward looking at her in concern since she was being so quiet she knew she had her answer. She couldn't see her life without the pair of them and while she hoped that it would never come down to it, she knew she'd be there, her bags packed and Poppy ready to go the moment he said they had to leave. Leaving her mum, Anna, Phil and even the Cullens who had quickly become like family to her would be hard, but in the end getting to see Edward and Lucy happy and safe everyday would be worth it. He didn't want to ask her to give up her life for him but staying behind would be doing exactly that. She knew herself and her feelings well enough to know that what she felt for Edward wasn't just a passing phase. If she ever lost him she doubted she'd ever feel anything like it again, he was it for her no matter what that entailed.

With that thought in mind, she smiled to Edward and let Lucy draw her into a conversation about sports day and they all enjoyed the rest of their meal. By the time Garrett was heading home and Carlisle was getting ready for work it would have been hard to tell any of them had anything on their minds at all.

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><p>Lucy's hyperactivity during dinner had rubbed off on Edward so much that when they moved back through to the entertainment room and she glanced to the piano, instead of scowling like he previously had when anyone showed it any attention, Edward offered to teach her. Both Esme and Bella looked at him in surprise but Lucy just nodded excitedly and ran around to climb up on to the bench.<p>

"You don't mind do you?" Edward asked Bella hoping her surprise was aimed more at the fact he'd offered to play the piano and not that he was suggesting something that only he and Lucy could really take part in.

"No, course not," Bella responded quickly with a smile, not wanting him to change his mind when it was something she was quite interested to see and was sure would be good for him, "I've got some college stuff to go through anyway."

Suitably reassured, Edward joined Lucy, lifting her up onto his knee once he'd got settled rather than having her sit next to him as although he'd made a breakthrough earlier on in the day with being able to play, he still wanted the reassurance of having her close. He didn't want to be reminded too strongly of the early days of his mother teaching him either so it had to be different, side by side just wouldn't do.

"He was playing earlier." Esme told Bella quietly as they watched them get started pulling Bella's attention away from the pair of them.

"Really?" She asked surprised, having been there for his reaction to initially seeing the piano in the room she hadn't thought he would be showing any interest in playing for a while yet. Not until he'd started to come to terms with everything that had happened anyway.

"Yes, it surprised me too. He wasn't in a very good mood this morning so to hear him suddenly play was one of the last things I expected." Esme responded and Bella mulled that over for a moment as she watched him again. He looked perfectly happy showing Lucy the notes for what she guessed to be Twinkle Twinkle Little Star from the individual notes he was playing and getting Lucy to copy.

"Maybe it's helped." She suggested, really hoping that would be the case. From all their talks she knew music had been incredibly important to him. If he'd managed to find that connection again it had to be a good sign and it did offer an explanation for how he was suddenly managing to seem so at peace even after reading everything in his father's files and coming up with the plan to run. If it had been any other day she would have expected to find him sullen and closed off after a day of dwelling on everything.

"I hope so, he was quiet until Garrett arrived but he seems to have perked up a lot since. Has he talked to you about it all?"

"We've not really had the chance yet but he's told me the gist of it. I'll stay tonight so he can tell me the rest." Bella replied a little awkwardly, well aware that what they'd be talking about later would most likely not be something Esme could ever know if Edward followed through on his plan.

"Good." Esme responded happily, glad that even if Edward had been unwilling to really listen to them, Bella had a much better chance of convincing him everything would work out ok in the end. They were interrupted then by the sound of the front door opening and the murmur of Alice and Emmet's voices so Esme excused herself to go talk to them as she still had to tell them the details of their mother's visit.

As Edward and Lucy were now fully absorbed in their music lesson Bella settled herself into one of the chairs facing the piano with her college notes on her lap and tried to let go of her concerns about Edward and his plan to concentrate on them. With Lucy's happy chatter, the surprisingly tuneful music and Edward's quiet instructions providing the background noise, Bella found her worries dissolving surprisingly quickly.

It was only after Lucy had mastered the playing of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star that she allowed Edward to persuade her it was bed time. He'd had just as much fun as her since she'd taken to the piano with much the same enthusiasm he had when he'd first started and the smile on her face had helped deter any of the more negative thoughts that brought up from taking hold. Bella's presence in the room had also added to his enjoyment as although he could hear the rustling of her notes every so often, he'd still been able to feel her watching them and whenever he'd glanced over to her she'd appeared fairly content in her chair which gave him hope that she would have come to the decision he was hoping for over his plans for if James was set free.

Bella set her notes down and helped Edward heard Lucy into getting ready for bed and once she'd had her glass of milk she was asleep fairly quickly, all the excitement of the afternoon finally taking its toll. Seeing that Edward was also starting to look tired, she suggested that they ought to go through to his room, something that he was happy to agree to, especially when once in his room, she pulled out the t-shirt and shorts she liked to sleep in at home from her bag indicating that she was staying.

"So…" Edward murmured once Bella was settled into his side and he could nuzzle into her hair, instantly relaxing with the burst of her familiar, comforting scent.

"I want to go with you." She responded, shifting slightly so she could look at him and he helped by gently brushing her hair back from her eyes so he could search them for her real feelings on the matter.

"Are you sure? It would mean leaving everyone behind, giving up your life here completely. There couldn't be any contact." He stressed, not wanting her to change her mind but knowing she needed to understand exactly what it meant. He didn't think he could stand her saying yes then backing out at a later point. She shook her head at him with a slight smile before reaching up to lightly kiss him.

"It wouldn't be giving up my life. It would be living it." She told him when she pulled back, "I do hope that it won't come to it but either way, I want to be where you are. If I stayed here without you I'd just waste my life away wondering where you were and worrying that James would find you and no one would know. I can't bear the thought of not being there with you. I love you and I'll follow you wherever you need to go so long as you want me to."

"I love you too and I'll always want you with me. Thank you for this, you have no idea how much it means to me." He responded reverently before letting his fingers sink through her hair so he could pull her into another kiss, this time one that left them both breathless. He hoped it wouldn't come to it either, but knowing that if the worst did happen, Bella would still be there made it easier. Whatever was coming, they'd be facing it together and though he'd learnt to cope on his own with what life threw at him, he was immeasurably relieved that he no longer had to.


	51. Chapter 49 Little By Little

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer and the title comes from the song Heaven (Little By Little) by Theory Of A Deadman.

_AN- Thank you so much for the great response to the last chapter! I really wasn't expecting so many of you to still be interested in reading this story so thank you again, I really appreciate it! This chapter took a little longer than I'd planned to post but I felt I needed to go back and rework it to do justice to all of you that are reading this, I find the fluffy stuff seriously hard to write though and I've not got anyone to check it for me so sorry if I've still not got it right!_

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><p><strong>Chapter 49 – Little By Little<strong>

Edward woke up with Bella still cuddled into his side. She was warm and her scent surrounded him, tempting him back into sleep where dreams of soft touches and naked skin against his fingertips taunted him. His head was fogged with it, longing for the images to continue but as he flexed his arm to pull her impossibly closer to allow just that the pain that radiated from his side reminded him that no matter how much he may crave having Bella closer, his ribs still were not ready for it. Disgruntled at the abrupt end to his dreams as the pain chased them away, Edward's eyes snapped open. Now he was aware of the pain it would be impossible to ignore it in favour of falling back to sleep but not wanting to inflict the same annoyance on Bella he tried to carefully untangle his arm from around her and slide over slightly in the bed. She still looked peaceful despite the removal of his warmth as she moved slightly to burrow her face into his pillow and as she hadn't set an alarm on her phone the night before he figured she didn't need to be up yet so he stayed where he was for a minute just watching her.

He still couldn't believe she'd agreed to go with him if he ran. It made it so much easier to deal with the shock of discovering his father was willing to help James as he didn't feel quite so much of a sitting target as he had before. Now they had a plan, and while it might not have been the best of solutions at least he knew they'd be doing something to try and keep Lucy safe. Instead of worrying over it, now the decision had been made, he wanted to be able to enjoy whatever time they had left with Esme and Carlisle. That also meant he needed to clear the air with Emmett. If they did have to run, he didn't want to leave Emmett thinking he still hated him. He'd managed to sort through his emotions a little the day before while he played and though he still wasn't ready to accept Emmett trying to meddle in his life any further, he wasn't angry at him anymore. It had been a displaced anger to begin with and he was ready to let it go. It was time to move forward and if his time with his family would end up being limited as he feared, he did not want to have any regrets of wasting it.

As Bella murmured something in her sleep that he couldn't quite make out it brought him out of his thoughts and the pain in his side reminded him that downing a couple of pain killers would be a good idea if he didn't want to start everyone worrying over him when they woke up. With that thought in mind, he carefully leant over and brushed Bella's hair back from her face so he could lightly kiss her temple causing her to murmur his name which in turn made him smile before he forced himself from the bed.

In the kitchen he found his new resolutions tested when he saw Emmett sitting at the breakfast bar with a bowl of cereal. He looked up at the sound of the wheelchair on the kitchen floor and the wariness that instantly clouded his eyes made a sadness fill Edward that told him he really was done with the anger and tired of not having his brother around so when Emmett made to stand up Edward shook his head.

"Stay." He mumbled as he made his way past him and towards the units, not quite knowing where to start with what needed to be said but Emmett did settle back onto his stool and seemed to be regarding him with curiosity as well as a little concern as he saw him wince while trying to move.

"Are you looking for your pills?" He asked cautiously, knowing how much Edward hated to accept his help but it just did not feel right to sit back and watch him when he was visibly hurting. Carlisle had kept him informed on how Edward was doing with his recovery and while he knew he was doing well, he hadn't seen Edward that much at all and had no way to judge if the discomfort he was seeing in Edward's face was normal or an indication that he needed help.

"Yeah, my ribs are sore." Edward explained taking Emmett by surprise when he didn't seem to be bristling at the offered help like he usually would and instead appeared to have stopped his hunt as he turned back to Emmett.

"Want me to get them?" He asked tentatively realizing that if his ribs were the problem, reaching over the units for things probably wasn't going to help.

"Please." Edward responded and though Emmett was thoroughly confused over Edward's pleasant attitude toward him he did bolt up and collect the pills and a glass of water for his brother before he sat back down with his now soggy cereal. Edward didn't seem to be in a hurry to leave the room once his pills were taken which confused Emmett further and he started to feel awkward as Edward continued to stay there, watching him and he wondered if he should leave instead.

"I'm sorry." Edward finally blurted making Emmett's eyes widen in surprise and his mouth to drop open. Seeing he'd stunned Emmett into speechlessness with that announcement Edward decided to just get the rest of it out before he could change his mind. "I know that what happened to me wasn't your fault and I'm sorry I took my anger out on you. I didn't mean what I said back in the hospital, it was just too much new information in my head when I wasn't dealing with it very well and you happened to be the closest target to focus the anger on. It's all been down to James, not you, so yeah, I'm sorry."

"No, you were right to be angry with me. I'm the one who should be sorry, and I am. For everything, angering James, what I did to Victoria and for pushing you. I should have learnt to listen to you sooner." Emmett spluttered, wondering if this conversation was even happening or if he was still asleep and just dreaming.

"Can we just forget it all? I'm sick of letting James get his way all the time." Edward responded to which Emmett nodded, a still slightly confused smile appearing on his face.

"I won't argue about that." He said so Edward smiled slightly too and they both managed to relax a little as Emmett offered to get Edward some breakfast. He thanked him but just asked for coffee making Emmett laugh when he explained he'd rather wait for Esme to get up before he had breakfast as it would mean he'd get to eat with Lucy but it was also clear Esme would be able to offer a much nicer breakfast than Emmett, a fact Emmett was well too aware of as he looked into his bowl of extremely soggy cereal. Its appeal well and truly lost, he threw it out and stuck a slice of bread in the toaster instead before he made coffee for the both of them.

"Did Esme talk to you about Mum?" Edward asked once Emmett had joined him at the table, taking him by surprise again. He hadn't even expected Edward to be talking to him any time soon and considering how much he seemed to detest talking about anything relating to his current situation it was the last thing he would have expected him to bring up but since he had been the one to start the conversation he nodded while he tried to think carefully about his answer, not wanting to risk breaking their new found truce so soon.

"She told both Alice and I about her visit and we saw the files she left."

Edward sipped his coffee as he regarded Emmett and thought about what he wanted to say. He knew Emmett's fondness for questioning everything so had brought up the obvious topic that would be on everyone's mind before Emmett had chance to. He didn't want to fight but as he'd already decided, things could no longer be ignored and he did have his own questions on the subject that had not been broached so far with Carlisle and Esme.

"Do you think Mum is ok?" He asked eventually and Emmett's eyes widened again at the further surprise. He'd spent most of the previous evening trying to convince Alice that their mother would be just fine. Esme hadn't seemed keen to go over that aspect of things during their talk and now seeing the anxiousness in Edward he assumed it must have been the same in their talks as well. No one had anticipated that considering his usual response to anything involving their parents.

"I'm sure she is. She's finally doing what she knows to be right. She's probably better right now than she has been in years. The guilt of what had happened was eating at her." He responded and watched as Edward frowned at that. He didn't comment further though and instead changed topics.

"What did you make of the files?"

Emmett sighed at that and again took a moment to try and think through his answer. He knew from Esme that Edward had not really taken the files or their reassurances well the morning before and he could see why so he wanted to reassure him if that was what he was looking for but he didn't want to lie to him either.

"I was surprised to the extent James had planned it all. I always thought he acted more rashly than that but I think Mum's plan will work. He certainly will not be able to find another lawyer like Dad and without that his defense will be pretty weak and you really don't need to worry about Lucy, we won't let anyone question your ability to look after her."

That response echoed everything Esme, Carlisle and Bella had already said to him and Edward knew that should have been comforting but he just found he was still glad that Bella had agreed to his plan to run. He was however impressed by the fact that Emmett just continued to watch him silently rather than try to question him further. It seemed he had finally learnt something from their arguments. Not wanting to dwell any further on James and his plans he took another sip of his coffee before putting it down and regarding Emmett with curiosity.

"How are things going with Rosalie?" He asked and grinned as Emmett actually blushed slightly.

"Good I think." He answered and then proceeded to tell Edward all about her. As Edward listened to him he was glad to realize that Emmett really did seem to care for Rosalie and it hadn't all just been about the chase. In fact it seemed like now she was actually giving him a chance he was even more enamored by her. It was amusing to see him so wrapped up by a girl as strong willed as he had heard Rosalie to be. From what Bella and Lucy had already told him, he knew Rosalie wasn't the type to let a guy get away with anything and now it was apparent that she was the perfect match for someone as impulsive and reckless as Emmett. He wondered if she was the reason he seemed more controlled already as he'd noticed him taking time to think through what he was saying rather than just blurting out the first thing that came to mind like he usually did.

All in all he was glad he had made the decision to talk to his brother. It felt better knowing that they were no longer fighting and it was good to have his brother back. The smile on Emmett's face was good to see as well as everyone had made it clear how much their last argument had upset him.

When Esme appeared a while later she was just as surprised to find Edward and Emmett chatting amicably at the kitchen table as Emmett had been. She was followed into the kitchen by a very sleepy looking Bella who showed no sign of noticing anything unusual at all as she headed straight over to the seat next to Edward and sank down into it.

"Tired?" Edward asked amusedly as she lightly leant her head against his shoulder. Her hair was messy and she was still dressed in the t-shirt and shorts she had slept in just with one of his worn zip up hoodies pulled over the top. It swamped her small figure, her hands being lost inside the sleeves and the bottom hem hitting just below that of her shorts but she seemed cozy in it and he liked it especially as it seemed she felt at home enough there to be seen dressed that way by the rest of his family.

"Yup, where'd you go?" She mumbled having not expected to wake up alone and quite disappointed at missing out on the chance of morning cuddles again after college had forced her to cut them short the day before.

"To get my pills. You looked too comfortable to wake up." He commented which made her sit up and look at him critically, some of the sleepiness draining away from her eyes.

"You ok?" She asked, not seeing any obvious signs of pain, in fact he looked quite happy which was unusual considering Emmett was sitting across from them at the table and watching their interaction with a smile on his face.

"Yeah, I'm good." He told her and he was smiling himself, still amused by how sleepy she was which made her scowl a little as she realized that fact.

"You're trying not to laugh at me." She accused but she couldn't hold the scowl in place when his eyes were twinkling with restrained mirth. He really was stunning and it just wasn't fair especially when he leant down to press a light kiss against her lips.

"You're adorable when you're sleepy." He said, not denying her accusation but pacifying her none the less as she dazedly stared up at him, "No college today?"

"Err… no, no college. I should probably do some studying though at some point." She responded absently, still finding it hard to think while looking at him and gratefully accepting the cup of coffee Esme had appeared at her side with.

"Do it here?" Edward asked hopefully. He really was addicted to her presence and he was fairly sure even day time television would be bearable if she was in the same room as him.

"That was the plan." She answered just as Emmett stood up and started collecting his things together which were still on the breakfast bench. It drew her attention and finally the oddness of the situation she'd walked in on started to trickle through her awareness.

"You two talked?" She blurted in surprise, looking quickly between the pair of them and finding no indication of any kind of awkwardness or animosity.

"We did, we're ok now." Edward told her, feeling a little proud of himself when she smiled at him, a feeling which only grew as Esme ruffled his hair as she joined them carrying a glass of juice.

"I'm glad to hear that." She commented, "Now do you want to wake Lucy or shall I?"

"I'll do it." He said cheerfully and as he reached her room holding the juice Esme had handed him and opened the door to see Lucy wrapped up in her covers, still fast asleep the new family dynamic they had going on in the house felt good. As soon as the thought registered, a twinge of sadness followed it at the thought of having to leave it all behind at some point but he chased it off with his resolve to enjoy the time they had. For the time being, it felt good being part of a large family again, and having Bella there made it all the more complete.

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><p>Edward had showered and was back in his room trying to pull a t-shirt on but struggling with it due to the stiffness in his shoulder and the pain in his ribs that his painkillers had been fighting only for his shower to aggravate again. He'd got the t-shirt stuck with his arm above his head but unable to force it to twist enough to get through the arm hole. With a sigh he gave up just as the door to his room opened and brought a waft of the scent of strawberries with it suggesting a freshly showered Bella had just returned.<p>

Bella stepped into his room and froze as her eyes landed on him sitting on the edge of his bed with the t-shirt caught around his head and his chest bare. It was really obvious the difference Esme's cooking was making. Even in such a short time he had filled out a lot. His ribs no longer stuck out and lean muscles were starting to define themselves, especially along his arms and shoulders. The scar on his abdomen was still red and raised and there was another scar at the top of his chest where they'd needed to insert the tube when his lung collapsed but she found those easy to ignore when faced with the clear evidence that he was alive and recovering well.

"Need a hand?" She asked as she finally noticed that he wasn't sitting there like that through choice and was actually getting very frustrated with his inability to get the t-shirt on.

"I can usually do this." He grumbled and if she could see his face she'd guess he would be scowling at the material that was currently hiding it. Deciding to put an end to his struggling before it put him in a bad mood for the rest of the morning she quickly moved to his side but couldn't help reaching out and letting her hand settle on the bare skin of his waist for a moment. He tensed at the surprise touch before he relaxed again so she let her hand drift up his side to just below his ribs loving the feel of his warm skin and making him shiver slightly. She heard the rustle of the fabric again, reminding her of what she was actually meant to be doing, so she quickly removed it from him entirely, revealing him to no longer be frustrated at the fabric but instead staring at her.

"I was meant to be putting that on." He murmured as he caught her around the waist but he didn't seem to be complaining as he slid his hand underneath the hem of her t-shirt instead and she understood the reason for his shiver as she felt the tingle his touch caused in her. It didn't take much encouragement to get her to move over a couple of steps to be stood directly in front of him and one of her hands automatically found its way into his slightly damp hair, straightening it out from where the t-shirt had left it mused.

"Is your shoulder hurting?" She asked, trying to distract herself from the way he was looking at her in the hope she wouldn't be compelled to do something that could make any of his aches worse. He wasn't healed enough to be trying out any of the thoughts seeing his new physique was causing her and she was pretty sure he wasn't there yet emotionally either. Too much had been going on and though nothing much had been said about the night Lucy had been conceived since he'd left the hospital she didn't think he would have had chance to even begin sorting through the mess that had created in his head. She knew he found comfort in having her around and in their closeness but after how he'd reacted to waking up wrapped around her it was clear he wouldn't be comfortable with anything more yet despite the way he was currently looking at her with eyes full of want.

"I guess, it's feeling a little stiff." He admitted reluctantly, disgruntled at the reminder as the t-shirt had been all but forgotten as he focused on Bella and the feel of her skin underneath his fingertips instead. It reminded him of the dreams her presence seemed to inspire. Now she was closer he could easily get both hands on her, his thumbs stroking up and down either side of her abdomen as his hands settled around her waist. He could tell by the way she kept tensing and relaxing that his touch was affecting her but she was diligently trying to ignore it as she worried over him.

She didn't respond to his comment and as her hand dropped from his hair he wanted to complain but then he felt her touch on his sore shoulder instead. It was gentle so as not to hurt him but he could feel her tracing the area that felt tight and uncooperative. He was about to tell her it was fine and not to worry but then he felt the pressure she was using increase and he realized she was massaging it the way the physiotherapist had showed them in the hospital. Carlisle had had to do it a couple of times for him after he had gone through his exercises but neither his, nor the physiotherapist's hands, felt anything like Bella's. Her hands were softer and warmer and she seemed to know exactly how much pressure to use. It felt amazing and he could feel the tightness of the muscles slowly melting away.

He tugged her closer so he could let his head fall onto her shoulder as his eyes closed making her pause for a moment, unsure of his motivations.

"Is this helping?" She asked, unsure if she was doing it right and a little concerned she could be hurting him.

"Mmhmm." He hummed contentedly, "Don't stop."

Resuming her actions, Bella was glad she seemed to have guessed right with what the problem was. She had felt it the instant her hands had touched his shoulder and she suspected it was probably due to the way they'd slept that the muscles were so knotted in the first place so she was relieved she could help fix it. It was also a good excuse to stay close to him as she was enjoying the feel of his hands on her and the sight of his bare skin far too much to have just helped him get the t-shirt on. She wanted to be able to memorize every detail of him but she was still somewhat distracted by her concern for him.

"You know, I really shouldn't be sleeping over if it's hurting you." She commented as she continued to work on his shoulder and he lifted his head up so he could look at her, letting her see the contentedness in his eyes.

"And you know I don't care about a little pain if it means you're close. Besides, if you can make my shoulder feel this good afterwards it is more than worth it." He told her making her smile a little at his charm.

"You're incorrigible." She laughed as he grinned at her but while he might not care about the pain, she really didn't want to be causing it even if the thought of trying to sleep alone was not a pleasant one, "I will be going home tonight though, I'm not getting into trouble with Carlisle again and if staying over two nights in a row has caused this, I don't want to know what a third night would do."

He would have preferred her to stay but she was probably right to be cautious as his shoulder and ribs where both complaining a lot more than they had been so he didn't argue with her decision. She probably needed to go home for clean clothes and to sort out her college stuff anyway and he did not want to be inconveniencing her by asking her to stay over all the time.

"What do you want to do today?" She asked as she moved her hands to around his neck, her fingers threading through the soft hair there since the muscles around his shoulder no longer felt tense, "If I'm going home anyway, I'll head off once Lucy gets back and do the college work I needed to get done at home. I get the impression she's ready for a night of just the two of you anyway."

"She loves having you here just as much as I do." He responded not wanting her to think Lucy was tired of her but she did have a point. Lucy had been very tired and clingy that morning after he had woken her up and it was only reluctantly that she'd allowed Esme to pull her away from him when it was time to leave. A quiet night would probably do her a world of good. "I think all the excitement of living here has finally caught up with her. She's been so hyperactive since I got here it's really not surprising that she's crashed. We're both used to life being much quieter."

"I know. It's good though right? You do like being here?" She asked. He seemed so much happier, they both did. It was obvious Lucy loved all the new members to their family and Edward had agreed to move in permanently but considering his worries over someone trying to take Lucy away and with the ease he talked about running, Bella was struck by the sudden concern that a stable home for Lucy if the authorities came looking was the only reason he'd agreed to stay. His bright smile set her at ease instantly though.

"Of course, who wouldn't?" He commented and when she raised an eyebrow in mock disbelief he shook his head a little, "Okay, I know I haven't always been the most cooperative when it comes to living with family but that was never because I didn't want to. I just didn't trust them not to leave. I do trust Esme and Carlisle, they want us here and while we are used to being on our own all the time, it wasn't good for either of us, I can see that now. It'll still take a bit of adjusting too but we both like being here. I've got no intentions of leaving here any time soon unless we need to, to keep Lucy safe."

"It's good to hear you say that." She responded and was so pleased that he seemed to genuinely mean what he was saying that she finally gave in to the pull she felt from seeing him looking so happy and leaned forward to kiss him. It quickly escalated, Edward happy to jump at the chance to kiss her properly now that she'd stopped focusing on worrying about him. Kissing her felt so good, her lips were soft and easily opened up to him and she tasted so sweet. He was pretty sure he could happily spend the entire day just kissing her but when his hands slid from her waist round to the small of her back to try encourage her even closer so he could work on doing just that, she stumbled slightly and knocked against the cast on his leg. It jolted him enough to force him from his Bella haze and he was suddenly aware that they both needed to breathe.

"I'm sorry, is your leg okay?" Bella asked as she pulled back from the kiss, blushing slightly as she realized she'd let him pull her into getting carried away so easily. When he was that close he was just far too hard to resist and she was glad the knock to his leg didn't seem to have caused any visible signs of pain although she didn't want to risk doing it again.

"It's fine, I can't feel much through the cast. It just jolted it a little." He told her with a smile and tried to get her back in for another kiss but her gaze kept going to his leg so he knew she was back to worrying. He really couldn't wait for the day he was back to full health. Resigned to the fact that he wasn't going to get his way again anytime soon he found he couldn't be upset about it when she was just trying to ensure he wasn't hurt anymore than he already was. It felt good to be cared about so much by someone he loved and that thought kept his smile firmly in place even when Bella stepped back, disentangling herself from him.

"You know, you're seeming awfully cheerful and enlightened this morning." She mused as she watched him. Not only was he still smiling but he wasn't trying to hold onto her when it was likely to hurt him and that was pretty out of character for him. She'd thought his peacefulness the night before was out of character as well and now he'd added talking to Emmett and being happy to surrender some of his independence to stay with the Cullens on top of playing the piano. It just didn't tally with his usual ways of dealing with things and while it was great to see him so content, the warning bells she'd felt the night before we're going off again making her question it.

"I am." He answered, looking steadily back at her and for once his eyes remained clear of their usual worries. Seeing the confusion Bella was feeling at his behavior he reached for his t-shirt and managed to quickly pull it on thanks to the miracle of her hands on his shoulder before he shuffled himself back on the bed so she could sit down too.

"Any particular reason why?" She asked once she was settled, sitting cross legged and facing him so she could see his face rather than cuddling up beside him like he'd initially intended.

He shrugged and took hold of her hand, linking their fingers together as he tried to think how to explain it Nothing had actually changed, the threat of James was still hanging over them and he was still feeling the aches and pains of his injuries but he did feel lighter, better.

"I played the piano yesterday. In the afternoon before Garrett arrived." He eventually started, figuring he may as well try and explain it from the start as his sudden change in attitude probably wouldn't be understood easily without it and he knew he had to be confusing her even if she did seemed pleased with how he was looking at things.

"Esme mentioned it. Did it help?" She asked and though he looked a little caught out that they'd already known he nodded.

"Yeah, it was difficult, lots of memories, but once I got started it did help. I used to get so lost in the music that it helped clear my mind and I guess it still works. I don't know how really, but it seems to help me sort through stuff, get rid of negative emotions." He tried to explain and even though he knew the words weren't really coming out right to explain just what it did for him Bella seemed to be understanding him just like she always did.

"Is that what brought on talking to Emmett?" She asked so he nodded again.

"Yeah, it was never really him I was angry at. I was just angry and it needed an outlet, he was there. I guess I got it out of my system when I played yesterday. If we do have to run I don't want to be leaving things here in a bad place. It wouldn't be fair to him and I don't want to hurt him or live with any regrets. We're happy here, it feels good to be part of a family again and I want to be able to enjoy that for however long it lasts. It's easier to do that now, especially as I know if the worst does happen, we have a plan, we won't just be a sitting target waiting for James to reappear and destroy everything."

"You know that may never happen right? You're right to try and enjoy every day here but it doesn't have to be something that has an expiry date. They are your family, they love you and they want you here with them. They'll do everything in their power to keep you both safe." She stressed, glad he was looking at things more positively but still a little sad that he seemed to think James coming back was inevitable.

"I guess we'll have to just wait and see on that, unless it's certain I need to be prepared for the worst so this is the best it is going to be right now." He responded as life had just been too hard for him not to expect the worst to happen at every available opportunity.

"Well it is good to see you looking at things a little more positively. I'd love to hear you play." She said not wanting to let him get too bogged down in the thoughts of James as she could already see the shadows encroaching in his eyes.

"I'm probably not that good to listen to right now, it's been a long time and I'm more than a little rusty." He tried to put her off but she just grinned at him.

"I still want to hear. Watching you and Lucy last night was great, you both looked so happy."

"I don't know, maybe later? There was something else I kind of wanted to get out the way while you're here and I'm still managing to think straight." He replied and the sudden insecurity in his voice caught her curiosity.

"Okay, what is it?" She asked so he pointed to the chest of drawers by his bed.

"The box Riley left, it's in the bottom drawer." He said and Bella instantly moved to retrieve it for him from where it had been hidden from Lucy's sight.

"You sure you want to do this now?" She asked as she sat back on the bed with it on her lap. It would be impossible to deny that she was curious about its contents but it was bound to dredge up difficult feelings for Edward and considering how happy he seemed she really didn't want to see anything ruin that just yet but Edward nodded.

"Yeah, I need to be moving forward now and while ever that box is sitting there I'm going to have thoughts of its contents haunting me. Let's just get it out of the way, who knows, you might get that piano performance afterwards." He tried to lighten the mood but it fell a little flat as he could see Bella worrying about the implication it left. Still, she moved up next to him and transferred the box to his lap, allowing him to pull the lid off.

The tiny baby grow was on the top just where he'd left it and when he lifted it out, the two photo's of baby Lucy he'd got stuck on the first time he'd looked in the box were uncovered, Riley and Jessica in full view. He took those out and handed them to Bella before he collected up a few more photos and took them out too, studying each one carefully before passing them on to Bella.

Lucy was at the center of every one of them but she wasn't always on her own. There were various ones with Jessica and Riley although James was noticeably missing from them all. She really was a tiny baby which he supposed made sense as she was still fairly small for her age. There were enough photos that seemed to have been taken fairly regularly so that he was effectively seeing her grow from a newborn to be the five month old he first met. It was wondrous yet heart breakingly sad at the same time. He had always wished he'd known what she had been like in those first few months and he was finally getting to see that but it also made the pain of having missed that time in her life so much sharper.

From the look of the photos, their home had not been in a much better state than his flat had been. The furniture in all the pictures was worn but her surroundings didn't look to have had a negative effect on her as she looked like a happy, healthy baby in all of the pictures suggesting someone had been taking good care of her. Jessica however didn't look healthy. The photographs where Lucy was clearly only a few days old showed Jessica to be tired but there was love in her eyes as she looked down at Lucy. The older Lucy appeared though, the more worn down Jessica's appearance became. She seemed to lose weight and the dark circles beneath her eyes got darker. He knew he looked similar in the early photographs he had of Lucy and himself but there was always a spark in his eyes that showed the love he had for his daughter in every one of them no matter how tired or worn down he had been. Jessica's eyes however had gradually lost their warmth until they were totally indifferent in what appeared to be the last photograph of the two of them together, as Lucy looked exactly how he remembered her from that very first night. There was no spark or emotion present at all as she stared at the baby lying on the blanket on the floor in front of her.

"She really wasn't well; you can see it even in these." He commented and Bella agreed. Looking at them now when they already knew it was obvious, but at the time it was probably all too easy to miss and write down the changes in her appearance to tiredness. It was unfortunate but nothing that anyone could be held accountable for no matter what James believed.

"Lucy looks well cared for though."

"That's probably down to Riley." He said as there were a few photographs of Riley holding or playing with Lucy and he looked happy in all of them, like a proper doting uncle. It was lucky he had been there as Edward didn't want to even think about what would have happened to Lucy had her care been left to James. There was a lot he had to be thankful to Riley for which was a difficult thought to come to terms with. Looking at the photographs it was also hard to know what to feel for Jessica. What she had done to him had been unforgivable but they didn't even know if she had been in on the planning and aware of the drugs or if James had tricked her like he had Riley. Now that she was gone there was no way they could ever find that out either as James would be the only one who could know but it was doubtful he would tell them the truth if they asked.

Edward really wanted to hate her for the turmoil she'd caused him but seeing the evidence of how she'd struggled with Lucy it was hard to hold onto that. She had given him his daughter, and from what Riley had said and the evidence in the first few pictures she had loved Lucy probably just as much as he did now. Picking up the small gold chain she had bought for Lucy he let it drape around his fingers and just felt sorry. Jessica had lost her life, Lucy had lost her mother and a loving uncle and he had lost the first five months of his daughter's life, all because of James' need for revenge. It wasn't fair to any of them.

"She was so small. I wish I hadn't missed those first few months." He sighed as he passed Bella the chain and picked up the tiny hospital wristband Lucy had worn after her birth instead. It was so small and he just couldn't imagine what she would have been like to hold at just an hour old. It caused his heart to ache knowing that he would never know. He couldn't go back and be there for it and even if he had been told about the pregnancy he doubted anything could have been any different. Lucy may not have even been allowed to exist had his father found out earlier on in the pregnancy. He had no doubt that had that news been presented to them, his father would have tried to pay Jessica to have the abortion James had tried to persuade her in to. He didn't know how strong Jessica would have stood against the pair of them had they joined forces and he doubted he would have been much use in supporting her. It would have been a mess and considering the guilt of abandoning Lucy had driven Jessica to suicide he couldn't see how having an abortion would have resulted in a different end for her. The guilt would have just gotten to her sooner and it would have haunted him as well. The way it had all played out probably had been for the best if only James hadn't been so hell bent on destroying him, his father hadn't lied about his whereabouts and someone had been there to stop Jessica from ending her life.

"There was nothing you could have done to change that. You didn't know and that wasn't your fault." Bella tried to comfort him but that wasn't the point.

"I know but I still wasn't there for her. I'll never know what it felt like to hold her when she was first born, to have seen her first smile, or watch her roll over for the first time."

"But you have been there for everything ever since and will continue to be so."

Bella was at least right with that and as she leant her head lightly against his shoulder in a silent offer of support he hoped she'd be right there with him too. He couldn't give Lucy her mother back, and he doubted they'd see Riley again but Lucy would have a family to love her no matter what happened and that was what was important now. It would be hard to find forgiveness for what had been done to him but looking at the photographs piled beside Bella he could finally let go of the anger. Whatever else Jessica had been, whether she was as guilty as her brother or not, she was still Lucy's mother. She had brought her into the world, loved her and done the best for her that she could and for that he would always be thankful.


	52. Chapter 50 Us And Ours

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer and the title belongs to a Mark Owen song by the same name.

_AN - Once again, thank you to everyone who continues to read and especially those of you who leave a review, it's those comments that keep me inspired to keep working on this and I'll be forever grateful to you for that :)_

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><p><strong>Chapter 50 – Us And Ours<strong>

When Lucy arrived home from school she didn't even wait for Esme to join her after locking up the car before she had the front door open and was running inside to find her dad. He was in his usual spot in the entertainment room and in her hurry to get to him she barely noticed Bella sat next to him. He offered a bemused sounding hello as she climbed onto his knee only for her to ignore it as she went for the hug she'd been longing for all day instead.

"Well I think that's my cue to leave." Bella announced as she smiled at the pair of them. It was clear Lucy's mood had not changed much from that morning and she knew Edward would be perfectly content to cuddle her for the rest of the night. After all he did still have a lot of hugs to catch up on after all the ones he'd missed while in hospital and he would be able to take full advantage of Lucy's cuddly mood without inflicting any further pain on himself thanks to her help with his shoulder earlier.

"You don't have to." He reminded her but she shook her head slightly as she stood from her seat, sitting the video game controller she'd been using down on the coffee table. She knew he meant it but she was also sure that they would both benefit from a night of just the two of them and she did still need to do her college work since she had spent the afternoon playing video games with him. Any hopes of getting him to play the piano for her had been forgotten after they had finished looking through the box of Lucy's first months. Edward hadn't appeared as upset as they had both feared and instead had seemed more reflective than anything which wasn't necessarily a bad thing so when he had suggested playing video games for the rest of the day she had been happy to oblige him and join in the mindless fun. He had obviously been doing a lot of thinking in the last few days and she couldn't fault him for wanting a break from it. Now though, it was time to let him enjoy some one on one time with his daughter and to stop putting off her studying.

"No, I've got that college work I need to do. Tomorrows Friday though so I can come round again after college if you want." She suggested as if she left then it would give her plenty of time to get through enough of her work that they would hopefully be able to enjoy the weekend together. Given the size of the smile that lit up Edward's face she guessed it was a good plan and was glad that he seemed to like the compromise as it was still incredibly hard to leave when he asked her to stay even when she knew it was for the best.

"We'd like that wouldn't we Luce?" He said as he lightly tugged on one of her bunches making her lift her face up from where she'd had it buried in his chest. She finally looked around and saw Bella so nodded and let go of Edward long enough to reach her arms out for a quick hug from Bella before she burrowed back into him.

"Good, I'll see you tomorrow then." Bella responded, leaning down for a quick kiss from Edward before kissing the top of Lucy's head as well.

"Love you Bella." Lucy murmured quietly making Bella's heart melt as she pulled back and reached for her bag that had been sitting on the floor by her feet.

"Love you too, both of you." She replied making Edward smile again as he echoed the sentiment and waved since Lucy seemed to be installed on his lap for the foreseeable future giving him no chance to even attempt to see Bella out.

"How was school baby?" He asked after they had heard the front door close. He was always happy to cuddle but she was being incredibly quiet which did concern him despite his earlier assumptions that she was just tired.

"Good." She answered, "I got a gold star for my reading."

"Wow that's great! Well done sweetheart." He praised, and she lifted her head up at that so he kissed her forehead. He really was very proud of her considering how hard she found reading. She smiled slightly in response but she didn't look as happy as he thought she should with that news which made him a little more concerned especially as she didn't seem to be launching into her minute by minute explanation of everything they'd done that day in class either.

"What did you do today?" She asked instead, looking up at him with inquisitive eyes so he smiled, hoping to get her to give some indication as to whether she was just tired or if there was something more to her quietness. So far he couldn't tell and he didn't like that feeling.

"Bella played video games with me, it was fun."

She did finally smile, glancing to the television to see a game was indeed paused but she didn't say anything and the smile dropped worryingly quickly which was especially unusual considering her usual fascination with anything involving Bella.

"Is anything wrong baby, you're being awfully quiet?"

"Sleepy." She mumbled, squeezing her arms tighter around him and hiding her face in his chest again.

"You sure that's all?" He asked not at all convinced but she nodded so he grudgingly let it go for the moment since she seemed to just want hugs and for the time being he could do that. Hopefully she'd come out with whatever it was that was bothering her after she felt more settled so he reached for the television remote and changed it to a children's channel for her. He watched her for a while, still concerned but she looked content to watch the cartoons so his gaze eventually drifted to the television as well.

"Daddy?" Lucy murmured after a while catching his attention and he stopped absent mindedly scratching at his leg where the cast started. He really couldn't wait for the time when it could be removed as it was now a pretty constant itch that he couldn't reach.

"Yeah?" He looked away from the television just in time to see her glance shift from his leg to his face and the troubled look in her eyes worried him. She'd been so happy most of the time that he had thought the sight of the cast no longer upset her but now his concern was back full force. Something was definitely bothering her and he really didn't like her earlier reluctance to talk to him about it.

"You're getting better?" She asked which confused him as Carlisle had already told her he was with his declaration that he was fit to attend her sports day.

"I am baby, Carlisle said I'd be good to go to your sports day remember? That means I'm getting a lot better. I know the cast still looks bad but it's just helping my leg to heal without letting me do anymore damage to it by accident." He assured her but she still didn't look too happy as she considered what he'd just said with a worried frown on her face. It didn't make sense considering she'd been so happy the night before. Nothing could have happened between her going to bed and waking up other than nightmares but she always went to him if that was the case. He doubted Bella being there would have stopped her, she was comfortable around Bella and he knew she'd gone to her for comfort when he'd been hurt. It was obvious now though that something else was concerning her other than his health since his response hadn't cleared her mood but as she remained quiet and gripped onto his t-shirt tightly with one hand he knew he had to wait for her to figure out what it was she wanted to say. He was totally lost as to what it could be.

"If you're getting better will we have to go home soon?" She eventually asked quietly, looking up at him with fearful eyes as her grip on his t-shirt tightened at the thought and it all suddenly made sense in a way that caused guilt to wash through him. With everything that had gone on with his mother showing up and then Lucy's excitement the day before over sports day he had completely forgotten to tell her of the decision he'd made while talking to Esme. After she'd calmed down from all the excitement it must have suddenly occurred to her that they were staying with Esme and Carlisle so they could look after him and if he was going to the sports day it had to mean he was getting better so would not need their care for that much longer. The fact he had been the one to wake her for school the last two mornings would have also lead her to that conclusion as it was the return of one of their old routines. It had never even occurred to him that she'd think that would mean they would have to leave. She'd been so happy there all along that he'd had the impression she already thought they were living there permanently. He felt terrible that his own insecurities about his family had been obvious enough that she had ever had to doubt the stability of her home.

"No sweetheart! I'm so sorry, I should have told you yesterday but you were so excited about sports day that I completely forgot. I talked to Esme and we're staying with her and Carlisle, this is home now." He explained quickly and was relieved when Lucy started to smile a little; glad that that seemed to be the response she was wanting.

"We don't have to leave?" She asked hopefully as knowing what had happened to her daddy, she would never have felt safe if they had returned to their flat. She had woken up that morning to see Edward by her side and she had still been tired enough that for just a moment she had thought they were back in the flat. As it crashed in to her awareness that they were in fact at the Cullens' house she had begun to wonder what would happen now that he was getting better. It felt wrong to be upset that he was healing so she had been reluctant to bring it up especially as he had been looking so much happier and she knew she should be too but despite her best efforts, she hadn't been able to stop thinking about the fears that she'd previously been ignoring thanks to the safety she felt in Esme and Carlisle's care. If they had to go home, not only would she have been reminded every day of what had happened but every time she left for school her daddy would have been left on his own and that thought simply terrified her. At the Cullens' house there were plenty of people around to look after him and keep him safe. She didn't even feel the need to worry about him so much like she did when it was just the two of them as she trusted Esme and Carlisle to do that for her.

"No, we can stay here as long as we want. Even after I'm better and I don't have this silly cast on my leg. In fact, we won't ever need to go back to the flat as I think Emmett and Alice are going to pack up the rest of our things and move them here this weekend" He reassured her as the last thing he ever wanted was for her to worry and it seemed to work as the tight grip she'd had on his t-shirt as she spoke slackened.

"I don't want to ever leave." She told him firmly and he smiled back at her not at all surprised considering the wonder that was her room and the way Esme spoiled her rotten at every opportunity. It was bittersweet to hear that though as if his worst fears happened and they did have to run he knew she would be upset to leave but he hoped that she wouldn't hold it against him for long. They would still have Bella, and with the money his mother had given them they wouldn't have to settle for somewhere as bad as their previous flat. He would do his best to insure they were happy wherever they ended up. For the time being though it was good to know she liked their current surroundings as it was getting easier to admit to himself and everyone else that he did as well.

"I don't either." He murmured to her before he kissed her forehead. She cuddled back into his arms, a lot more content than before now that she knew they wouldn't have to return to their old flat but still wanting comfort to chase away the residual feelings of unease and realising she wasn't intending on going anywhere, Edward tightened his arms around her in return.

Lucy may have been settled but Edward was left to wonder just what was happening with the police. They had heard nothing from them or his mother and with Lucy's desire to stay where they were it suddenly felt more urgent to know how things were going. They were in to the second day now and he couldn't help but think they should have heard something from someone in relation to what was happening. He really hoped the silence meant they had taken his mother's statement seriously and were just taking time to investigate it. It was the only explanation he could think of for why they had yet to hear anything and he just prayed that they would find whatever it was they needed to lock James away. What he had said to Lucy was true; he really didn't want to leave.

Esme joined them briefly, bringing drinks and a snack for Lucy. She gratefully accepted them but refused to move from Edward's knee and he saw the concern flash across Esme's face at her odd behaviour but Lucy decided to talk before Edward could.

"Daddy said we can stay with you." She said causing Esme to smile.

"That's right. We love having you here and you can stay as long as you want." She assured them and Lucy finally let go of Edward so she could climb down, run across to Esme and hug her tightly instead.

"Thank you!"

"Oh sweetheart you don't need to thank me. You're the ones doing us a favour, this house is far too big for just Carlisle and I and we love you. You're family so this will always be your home if you want it to be."

She glanced up at Edward over Lucy's head as she spoke since Lucy was too busy getting her hug to look at her and she saw the gratitude in his eyes and just hoped that he believed her. Even when he eventually decided he wanted to have his own space again, which she was sure would happen one day considering how serious both he and Bella seemed to be about their relationship, she wanted him to know that they would always be welcome in their home. He never had to go back to being without the support of family and as he watched her hug his daughter with a smile on his face it gave her hope that he finally was understanding and beginning to trust in that fact.

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><p>After dinner Lucy cuddled up on Edward's lap again as they went over her reading homework before she managed to convince him to play the piano for her since she was still too tired to be bothered playing with any of her toys. Esme joined them once Carlisle had left for work since Alice was out with Jasper and Emmett had shut himself away in his room with a call from Rosalie. By then they were already settled at the piano, Lucy tucked into his side, underneath his arm with her head resting against his chest. He was playing a soothing lullaby that Esme did not recognise and she began to wonder if he had always chosen to play from within himself or if he was missing the presence of sheet music to play from. He certainly didn't need it though. The notes flowed much more smoothly than what she'd heard him play before but as his attention was focused more on the little girl cuddled into his side than the keys she was sure that was the reason. He really was very good and she could just imagine how proud his grandfather would have been if he'd been around to witness it. It was him that had installed the love for the instrument within both Elizabeth and herself and it was good to see it still being passed down the generations as it was obvious Lucy was just as taken with it as her dad. Esme had no doubts whatsoever that Lucy would eventually learn to play just as beautifully as Edward could what with her natural aptitude for learning and Edward's skill and she hoped she would get to hear a good few years of it, right there at her own father's piano.<p>

Edward's playing slowly tapered off, and as the last note softly faded out she watched as Edward leant down to kiss Lucy's head before his hand lifted from the keys and gently ran down one of her bunches. Lucy didn't move in response and she could see the soft smile playing on Edward's lips as he looked at her. Glancing back up he noticed Esme watching them.

"She's asleep." He told her, letting his arm settle around Lucy to hold her against him despite the fact the way she was sitting meant her arm was pressing into the healing wound in his abdomen.

"I'm not surprised, that was a very beautiful lullaby." Esme commented causing Edward to blush slightly at the compliment although he didn't comment. "Is everything ok with Lucy? She's been very quiet today."

"She was worried that we would be going back to the flat now I'm getting better." He explained and Esme saw the way it troubled him, "I didn't realise she'd worry like that, the way she's always spoken about this place I just assumed she already thought it would be more permanent. I should have explained it to her sooner."

"A lot has been going on and you only just made the decision to stay here. She can't have been worrying about it for long, she's been happy until this morning." Esme tried to soothe him but as far as he was concerned, Lucy should never have had to worry about it at all.

"I know, I just hate the thought of her having to worry about anything. That's my job."

And worry he did. After Esme had helped him get Lucy to bed, she sat with him in the entertainment room as they watched television and it was clear something was on his mind. Knowing he didn't like to be pushed to talk about things, she let him sit in silence but she kept him company so she would be there if he did decide he wanted to talk. She was fairly sure she knew what would be on his mind anyway and there wasn't much she could say to help. They were all anxious to hear some kind of news as to what was going on with Elizabeth's plan. So far they had still heard nothing and she knew it was playing on Carlisle's mind as well. They had spoken about it that afternoon and had come to the conclusion that the longer it took to hear anything, the better the news would eventually be but unfortunately that still didn't really help put their minds at rest and if they were that anxious about it she hated to think how the uncertainty would be making Edward feel. He had been surprisingly happy the night before which had cheered everyone else but now that neither Lucy nor Bella were around to keep him distracted it seemed the worries were back to cloud his mood and it just wasn't fair. After everything he had been through, he deserved some peace.

As it got later she could see him getting tired but he made no move to go to bed and instead he moved to settle down with his head on her lap. It surprised her for a moment but the warmth the action spread through her soon took over and she ran a hand through his hair, happy to give him the comfort he seemed to be silently seeking. It struck her again how similar he and Lucy were as she had chosen to go straight for hugs when something had been bothering her and she was glad to think that Edward trusted her enough to allow her to try and soothe him when he felt the same way. It also gave her hope that he would talk to her eventually if he needed to.

When Carlisle arrived home in the early hours of the morning that was exactly how he found them. Esme was still awake, watching television with the volume turned down low and Edward was fast asleep, her hand still running through his hair.

"Everything okay?" He asked warily as he slumped down into a chair. It had been a long and tiring shift and he had expected everyone to have been in bed long before he made it home.

"I think he's just worrying about things. Lucy was upset earlier thinking they would have to go back to the flat if he was getting better and it upset him to know she'd been worrying like that." She explained, "The fact we haven't heard anything from Elizabeth or Detective Jenks yet probably isn't helping either."

"No, I should imagine not." He sighed knowing there was nothing they could do about any of it, "It's late, we should all be getting to bed. Maybe there will be some news in the morning."

"I know, I didn't want to disturb him though." Esme responded, looking down at Edward who appeared to be sleeping peacefully.

"He'll not thank us for it in the morning if he stays like that; he's lying on his bad shoulder." Carlisle pointed out so Esme reluctantly let him wake Edward. He was groggy, but didn't complain as Carlisle helped him into his chair and steered him in the direction of his room while Esme collected his pills. They stayed just long enough to make sure he was safely in bed and then left for their own room. Even half asleep Edward was still aware enough to switch his pillow for the one Bella had used, feeling much more content with her scent surrounding him.

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><p>Edward was tired and restless. He'd woken up with his shoulder aching and a lingering sense of dread from an uneasy sleep. Lucy had been back to her bright and happy self which had improved his mood slightly but as soon as Esme took her to school he was left to his own devices. Carlisle was still sleeping, Emmett was at work and Alice was at school so there was no one to distract him and he found himself stuck trying to figure out where his new resolve to stop worrying and enjoy his time at the Cullens' had gone.<p>

Bella was at college so his attempts at texting her to keep himself occupied were not very successful as she could only respond sporadically. He didn't want to play video games or watch television and although the piano was tempting he didn't want to risk waking Carlisle. There was no way he'd be able to settle to read a book so stuck in his chair there wasn't much else he could do other than his physiotherapy exercises. Doing those made him wish Bella was around even more as his shoulder protested angrily once he was done but the concentration and determination it took to get through them did at least successfully take his mind off everything for a while.

Unfortunately as soon as the pain got too much to be able to push through to continue the exercises, his thoughts returned straight to James. He really wished he knew what was going on. Even if it was bad news he would rather know than be left wondering. It seemed strange that they hadn't at least heard from his mother. They didn't even know if she'd had somewhere safe to stay having left his father and he did not like the idea of her being out on her own like that. If his father knew what she had done then he would not be pleased and the bruise on her face was a clear indicator that his anger had found alarming new levels. There was no way he wanted his mother to suffer any further at his hands.

The longer he thought about it, the more anxious he felt about the outcome of her plan too. Lucy's upset over the thought of having to leave the Cullens' house had really made him question his escape plan for if James was free. He needed to keep Lucy safe, but that instinct was warring with the need to keep her happy. Up until then, all she'd really needed or wanted was him. That made the decision to run a much simpler one as he would always be with her no matter where they went but now he could see that their life had become much more complicated. Lucy loved their new family, she'd taken to Esme and Carlisle like the grandparents she'd never had and it wasn't just her. He didn't much like the thought of leaving them either. If it was just him, he knew he would be able to do it if he really had to but he was beginning to wonder if he could force himself to take Lucy away from them even if it was for the best. The decision no longer felt like one he could make. He couldn't do it. He couldn't take her away from people she loved; he just couldn't hurt her like that. It would destroy him but he couldn't lose her either.

That left all his hopes pinned on the police believing his mother and finding the evidence they needed to prove James was lying. There was absolutely nothing he could do but wait and he hated feeling like that.

"What do you think is happening?" He asked the instant Esme reappeared from dropping Lucy off at school and collecting some papers she needed from her office. She sighed, seeing how anxious he was and knowing there was still nothing she could do to fix it.

"I don't know honey; I thought we would have heard something by now." She admitted, moving across to join him on his sofa.

"It's not going to be good news is it?" He asked miserably, his thoughts all too eager to jump straight to the worst case scenario.

"You can't think like that. The police have to check things and James has done a pretty good job of covering his tracks so far, it is going to take time."

"I hate this." He muttered, leaning his head back against the sofa to stare at the ceiling, trying to hide the turmoil in his eyes. Esme felt terrible that she couldn't do anything or even offer much reassurance without straying into the rough territory between positive thinking and lying which he would never believe anyway.

"I know you do, we all do, but we just have to be patient and have faith that the truth will come out."

"What if it doesn't?" He asked, turning his head to the side to look at her with very thinly veiled desperation. He was lost as to what he could do in that event and just wanted someone to tell him. Running was the only thing he could think of that would keep them safe but that no longer seemed possible without hurting Lucy. He needed there to be another option.

"Let Carlisle and I worry about that. You've been through enough. We'll keep you safe, I promise."

Esme was pleading with him to just let go and put his trust in them to do as she said and he knew she meant it. He just didn't know if that was something she could promise. They would try, from the first moment of finding out who they were he had known that much but having seen how much work James had put into his plan and how clever he had been to orchestrate it in such a way Riley would take the blame, it was impossible to know what he would do next if given half a chance. Safety was not something anyone could promise him if James walked free.

He did appreciate the sentiment though so when she suggested he give her a hand with some of the plans she had to go over for work he accepted, glad to have something to try and take his mind of waiting for the phone to ring. Considering he knew nothing about interior design he wasn't really much help but he did have fun watching Esme work and found the whole thing rather fascinating. Just the change of scenery from the entertainment room to the kitchen was welcome too. The light was much brighter, streaming in through the large windows and he had been spending far too long staring at the television screen which really didn't help his mood. He wasn't the type of person who was meant to be sedentary.

Carlisle appeared shortly before lunch time, dressed in his more relaxed wardrobe of jeans and a t-shirt suggesting he wasn't in work that day. Seeing the table by the window was covered in fabric swatches, paint colour charts and Esme's large, hand drawn floor plans he offered to prepare lunch, taking Esme by surprise as she'd been holding out two of the fabric swatches, asking Edward which he preferred. Instead of accepting his offer however, she quickly dropped the fabric back to the table, stood and kissed his cheek before telling him to take a seat as she would prepare lunch herself.

Doing as she said Carlisle sat and looked to Edward who was still looking bemusedly at the fabrics Esme had been asking him about.

"Let me guess, she's been asking you all morning what goes with what, then ignoring whatever you say and going with the options she'd first chosen?" He asked, being well practised in the way Esme worked. He had been in Edward's place at the table more times than he could count and had quickly learnt that it didn't matter at all what he had to say as all Esme really needed was someone's presence to bounce her own ideas off of.

"Yup. It kind of reminds me of Alice." Edward responded, "She's good though, it's fascinating watching how she puts all this stuff together."

Carlisle agreed with that and watched Edward closely as they continued to chat about the plans Esme was currently working on. He seemed relaxed at first glance, he was smiling and genuinely interested in Esme's work but every so often he would rub at his shoulder or glance to the phone handset that had been left on the table, half covered by Esme's papers. He was clearly still anxious for news.

Esme rejoined them with cups of tea and sandwiches and asked if Bella would be joining them later. The smile on Edward's face grew as he said she would and Carlisle was glad as the times she visited seemed to be the only ones where he could truly forget what was bothering him and just have fun. She was a good influence, grounded but playful enough to pull out the happier side of him which he needed after having spent far too long lost inside his own head.

They spent the rest of the afternoon talking while Esme worked and she was so absorbed in what she was doing that Carlisle took the opportunity to collect Lucy from school. With his work schedule he hadn't had many chances to see her or get a hug so he was happy to take full advantage of his day off to do just that.

When they arrived home Lucy was a little surprised not to find her dad in his usual spot but was quick to rush into the kitchen where he was still sitting with Esme. She climbed up onto his knee and the fabric swatches instantly caught her attention causing her to pepper Esme with questions about what she was doing. Deciding she had done enough work for the day, Esme was more than happy to answer her and enlisted her help to gather them all together to be put away so there was space at the table for Lucy to do her maths homework once her questions had been answered.

Bella arrived just in time for dinner and Lucy greeted her with a hug before asking her what she had been doing at college all day making it clear that her mood from the day before had been long left behind like Edward's texts throughout the day had indicated. He had told her what had upset her in the first place and Bella knew how much it had been bothering him so it was good to see her back to her usual happy self. Dinner itself was a fairly noisy affair as Alice and Emmett both arrived home and Lucy looked especially pleased as Edward showed no animosity towards Emmett.

Lucy roped them all into a game of monopoly after they had eaten, thoroughly enjoying the large number of people to play with and not even minding when Edward pointed out how late it was getting and that she needed a bath before bedtime. Instead she just handed her large pile of property cards and cash over to Esme so the game could continue without her. Edward had already gone bankrupt and Bella was pretty close so by the time Edward was back from keeping an eye on Lucy and tucking her into bed, she was ready to hand the last of her cash over to Carlisle.

With Lucy now in bed it was easier to see Edward's tiredness. They had retreated to the entertainment room since the monopoly game had started to get rather competitive between Alice and Esme and Edward was ready for some peace and quiet.

"Are you ok?" Bella asked as she studied him. He had grimaced as he had moved from his chair onto the sofa and he really did look tired making her wonder if they would have been better going straight to his room.

"My shoulder hurts a bit, I think I over did my exercises a little this morning." He answered which explained the grimace but she knew him better than that.

"There's something else. You said you got everything sorted with Lucy right? She certainly seems happy again."

"Yeah, I'm just anxious to hear from my mum or the police. It's been three days now." He sighed, "She was so upset over thinking we couldn't stay here, I don't know if I can take her away from Esme and Carlisle even if it is for her own safety. She loves them too much."

"We don't know if it's going to come down to that yet, it might not even be an issue." Bella tried to comfort him only for him to shake his head sadly.

"But it might, and I can't stop thinking about it. I can't hurt her like that but I can't think of any other way if James is free. I just wish we knew what was going on."

"What about the piano? You said that helped you sort through things, have you tried playing it?" She asked thinking that it had markedly improved his outlook on things before so it had a chance of doing the same again.

"I played yesterday for Lucy, she fell asleep." He commented, a fond smile briefly appearing at the thought.

"Well why not give it a go again? I'd love to hear you play and you distracted me with video games the last time I asked." Bella pointed out but Edward's smile fell.

"My shoulder's too sore. Besides, I'm really not that good." He hedged; playing for Lucy was completely different to playing for Bella. He was fairly certain that it wouldn't matter what he played for Lucy, she would love it just the same but Bella was different, he wanted to be able to impress her and it made him nervous.

"How about I massage your shoulder for you, then you try play something?" Bella suggested, trying to tempt him into it as he really had seemed to enjoy her previous attempt at a shoulder massage and despite her desire to hear him play she really did think it would help. The fact he had chosen to go to the entertainment room rather than his own made it clear he didn't want to sleep just yet and if he was just going to spend his time stressing out over not hearing any news than playing the piano had to at least be worth a shot for taking his mind off it or helping him find a way to be at peace with his thoughts.

"Okay, I guess that could work." Edward agreed as at least it would make his shoulder better and the smile Bella graced him with was definitely worth it. She was out of her seat and reaching for his shoulder straight away but deciding it wouldn't feel the same with the fabric of his t-shirt in the way he quickly lifted it over his head, ignoring the flare of pain the movement caused as he knew the instant he felt Bella's touch it would fade. She hadn't been expecting the action but decided her plan was even better than she had originally thought and leant down to quickly kiss the now bare skin of his shoulder before she let her fingertips glide over it. Considering how tight the muscles felt she was surprised Edward hadn't been showing more signs of pain so she got to work, easing out not only the muscles but Edward's anxiousness too.

The soothing effects of Bella's hands enabled Edward to relax and it wasn't until she'd finished and they had moved over to the piano bench that Edward felt the butterflies of nerves return. As he stared down at the keys he quickly tugged Bella down beside him before she could even think about moving further away. If he was going to do this then he needed her close.

She watched as he stared at the keys wondering if she had made a mistake in pushing him to play. He seemed to enjoy it so much with Lucy and he had explained how much it had helped him to sort everything out in his head before so she had assumed it wouldn't be such a big deal but as he sat frozen she couldn't help but think she might have been wrong. She was just about to tell him they could do something else when he suddenly seemed to relax and he started to play. After that it was her who was frozen as she watched his fingers move across the keys with awe. He had said he would be rusty but she heard no signs of it in the gentle melody he was playing. It was beautiful and calming and she could have listened to it all night. He was simply amazing.

Unfortunately, it didn't last anywhere near as long as she had hoped as it was only minutes after he had started that someone knocked on the front door. Edward's fingers immediately stopped and a harsh, discordant note rang out in the room as he turned to look at the door. It was far too late for anyone to be getting visitors.

"Want me to go see who that is?" Bella asked as they heard Esme in the corridor heading for the front door but Edward shook his head, fairly sure they were going to be finding out shortly anyway. He had a feeling it was going to be to do with him. A feeling that was proved right as Esme walked in, followed closely by Carlisle and Detective Jenks.

"What's going on?" Edward asked, desperately trying to read from everyone's faces what was to come but getting nothing. Both Carlisle and Esme looked as anxious as he felt and the Detective's face was carefully blank as he answered.

"I'm sorry for calling round so late but I have some news I thought you would all want to hear."


	53. Chapter 51 Checkmate

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

_AN - I'm so sorry! I was meant to post this chapter two weeks ago but on the final read through before uploading it I decided the second half of it needed totally redone as it just wasn't reading quite right. Four rewrites later and I'm going to try posting it so I just hope it's finally good enough!_

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><p><strong>Chapter 51 – Checkmate<strong>

"How are you doing? You're looking a lot better from when I last saw you." Detective Jenks asked Edward as he took a seat, well aware that he was eying him warily while they waited for Esme to return with Alice and Emmett in tow.

"I'm okay, healing." He responded shortly, not in the mood for small talk when he wanted to know exactly what the detective was there for. He and Bella had moved back to his usual sofa and she was keeping a firm grip on his hand, reminding him she was with him. She didn't need to be touching him though to know just what effect Jenks' appearance was having on him as he was visibly trembling and she couldn't blame him. What the detective was about to say had the potential to dictate how the rest of their lives would go.

"That's good, I'm glad." Jenks stated, genuinely pleased to hear it and their small talk was thankfully interrupted then by Esme returning with Alice and Emmett. They both looked just as anxious as the rest of them so once they had all taken a seat Jenks dived straight into to his reason for being there.

"I'm sorry for dropping by unannounced like this but I thought you would like to know that we charged James Hadrian with two counts of attempted murder earlier today."

That statement was met by stunned silence as they all stared at him. It was the news they had been waiting to hear but it still came as a surprise and while hope gradually appeared on Alice's face, something occurred to the rest of them that Edward was the first to question out loud.

"Two?"

"Yes, two. The first was of course the attempt on your life, the second, Bella's." The detective explained making Bella frown and grip Edward's hand tighter.

"What do you mean? We only fought because I didn't want to let him near Edward." She questioned shakily. They had fought, she couldn't deny that, but she had only ever believed that their fight had just been collateral damage along the way of James carrying out his plan to murder Edward. She had fought to protect him; she had never been the target herself. She could feel Edward's thumb stroking up and down the back of her hand trying to comfort her but it didn't do much good against the panic the detective's next words ceased her heart with.

"You did but we believe James Hadrian's intentions were entirely different. He walked into the hospital carrying a knife and he most likely knew you were inside along with Edward. That means there was intent and he had motive considering you were the one who foiled his plans the first time by acting so quickly to get to Lucy and then Edward. From your statement, Mrs. Masen's statement and the injuries you sustained, we believe that had the fight not been interrupted when it was, he would not have released his grip on your throat and may well have used the knife against you to ensure you couldn't stop him again."

"He really meant to kill me?" She questioned weakly, not liking the fear that thought spiked in her. The fight was long over but knowing that was his intention was still terrifying. She could fully understand now why Edward thought running was the only option as she strongly felt like doing it herself although it was doubtful she would ever be able to outrun the fear. How Edward had stayed put for so long suddenly seemed like an incredible feet of bravery to her.

"We believe so. You were very lucky." Jenks stated gravely, slightly concerned over just how shaken Bella appeared by the news. They all already knew how dangerous James could be so he hadn't expected it to come as such a shock and he felt a little bad for the way he had just announced it so bluntly. He wasn't sure it was the kind of news that could ever be delivered gently though and just hoped the fact that they had charged James would help with the fear he could see radiating from her once she had gotten over the initial shock of the news.

"You believe so? Can you actually prove it? Surely the knife was meant for me." Edward jumped in pulling the detective's attention away from Bella as he was just as concerned for her and wanted to take her fear away even it meant directing James' motives onto himself. He had been dealing with the fact James wanted him dead for a while anyway and had somewhat come to terms with it but he felt sick knowing he felt the same way about Bella. He was unbelievably thankful that she had been strong enough to prevent him from succeeding and while he wanted to focus on the fact that they had charged James, what the detective had said sounded weak to him. He really didn't trust that it would be enough to convict him and they had to be able to prove, without any doubt that James was guilty or he would be free to have another go and they might not get so lucky again. James now knew Bella would fight and would plan accordingly. They needed more than circumstantial evidence and the detectives own opinions.

"We don't have to but yes, I think we have a convincing case either way. We found him on the footage from the hospital security cameras. He waited outside the hospital and watched all your visitors but Bella leave before he entered the building and we don't believe the knife was ever intended for you. We found a full syringe in his pocket that when tested, proved to contain a very strong dose of heroin, one which was far too strong for recreational use. We believe he intended to inject it into your I.V. and given your condition at the time we have it on good authority that it would have been lethal. There would have been no need to use the knife and it would have been a much quieter and quicker method. It is likely you would have died before anyone could get to you, even with being in the hospital already. He meant to leave nothing down to chance and with a knife wound there would have been the possibility that someone could have reached you in enough time to stop you from bleeding out."

Edward looked to Carlisle and realising what he was looking for he nodded.

"The detective's right. Given how weak you were it could very easily have killed you instantly. You were touch and go as it was and even a healthy person can die quickly from an overdose. Your body simply wouldn't have been able to cope." He explained before turning to the detective, "But what do you mean by not needing to prove it?"

"The attack against Bella is only a secondary charge. What we can a hundred percent prove is that he tried to murder Edward and that is the important part. He is going to go down for a very long time and there is nothing he can do about it."

"How can you be so sure?" Carlisle continued to question. It was clear Bella had been badly shaken by what Jenks had already said along with Edward as they clung to each other and he had been anxious enough beforehand. What the detective was saying didn't seem strong enough to correlate with his relaxed, almost gloating demeanour as he talked about the charges. They were missing something.

"We have a water tight case against him in relation to the attempt on Edward's life. There is no way he can weasel his way out of that charge. He will be going down for a minimum of twenty years for that alone. The second charge could add extra time to that sentence and while the case isn't as conclusive, there's still a chance of conviction given the rest of his behaviour. His new lawyer is currently advising him to plead guilty in the hope that his overall sentence will be reduced. If that does happen then we won't have to go through the process of a long trail but from what I've seen he doesn't seem co-operative which I think in the long run will work in our favour. Either way, he will be going to prison. The only question is for how long and I'm confident he's looking at a minimum of twenty years but it is more likely to become at least twenty five."

"How can you be so sure that he will be found guilty?" Esme joined in the questioning as it did all sound like good news but it was obvious Edward and Bella were both still worried and a glance to Carlisle showed that he didn't look entirely convinced yet either. What the detective was saying was just too good to be true and after everything that had happened it seemed far too easy.

"We received some new evidence earlier this week from Elizabeth Masen. She told us she visited you before coming to us to warn you about Edward Seniors violent nature since the kids were here so I'm assuming I don't need to go over everything she had to tell us?" He paused and when Esme nodded to confirm that they had indeed spoken to her, he continued, " Well what she told us brought up enough questions to enable us to go back over a few things and take a closer look. I am now confident that we can prove James Hadrian was behind the planning of the attacks against Edward as not only did we go back and check the routine blood tests the hospital took when he was admitted and found traces of the medication he claimed not to be on but Laurent Da Revin has also since changed his statement."

"Why would he do that?" Emmett wondered out loud, remembering well his smug expression as he watched him getting more and more worked up over not being able to find his phone or get his work done. There had been no signs of remorse for what he was doing so he doubted that he would willingly incriminate himself by admitting to his part in it all.

"When he found out the law firm that had been representing them all had dropped the cases due to Edward Masen Seniors involvement it seems he got scared of what he could be charged with. As a result he is now fully co-operating with the investigation and supports the statements received from both Riley and Edward. He now swears that James was paying him off and it seems he is not willing to risk a jail term in return by letting it go to trial as if James was found guilty after he had sworn that Riley was the one behind it all then he could well have been charged with perjury."

"That is good to hear but what about James' claim of reduced culpability due to mental illness? Can he not still claim that to get a reduced sentence?" Carlisle asked, still unsure how they could get around that one. After seeing his medical records there was no way they could deny that he had been diagnosed with a mental illness that could have contributed to his actions.

"No, not now it has been proved he has been lying this whole time and was behind all of the planning. When we checked his blood test results and found traces of his medication in his system we searched his flat. His prescription medication bottles were there and all full like he had been claiming but we also found some non prescription bottles that had been hidden. We tested both sets of drugs and it appears he was switching them so if anyone did check up on him, it would look like he wasn't taking his prescribed medication. It was a clever move and we probably would not have even looked at it further after finding his prescription meds but with the knowledge that most of the statement he originally gave us was a lie thanks to Elizabeth pointing out the errors surrounding Edward's supposed disappearance and then Laurent stating it was James that was paying him and not Riley like we had been led to believe we were looking a lot closer at everything than he had ever expected. The added evidence in the routine blood tests the hospital took when he was admitted after his fight with Bella was just the icing on the cake. He never anticipated that he himself would be admitted and he cannot deny the proof of the drugs in his system. As he has never even tried denying that he was the one to attack Edward in his flat, now we can also prove that he was the one who planned it and that he was on his medication at the time so did know exactly what he was doing, he has nothing left to argue. No lawyer in their right mind would take the case and expect to win; there is just too much evidence against him." Jenks responded cheerfully as he was certain they would now get the conviction they were hoping for and was glad to finally be able to give the family some good news. He had always believed James to be the one behind it all but without the proof that he was indeed in charge of his own actions there had been a significant chance that the right lawyer could have gotten him off. As far as he was concerned, there was very little chance that could happen now. It felt really good to be able to get to the bottom of it all and to have all the evidence he needed to prove it. He had not liked the feeling that James was running rings around them all and during his last questioning session it had been incredibly satisfying to see the smug smile drop from his face as he realized they had got around all his careful planning and there wasn't anyone that could get him out of the trouble he was in.

"If he is found guilty of all this, what kind of sentence is he looking at exactly?" Edward asked tentatively as the idea that James could indeed be seeing the inside of a jail cell started to sink in but they did still need to know just how long he would be in prison for. He didn't think jail time would be much of a deterrent to him in the long run; it would just give him time to come up with a better plan. He was not going to forget his need for revenge, not when even more reasons for it had now been added.

"Well it would be a life sentence and due to the severity of your injuries the sentence is likely to be between twenty to twenty five years for that alone. Depending on whether he is found guilty or not of the second charge then that could add a further six to ten years to his sentence." Jenks explained and spotting that Edward still wasn't looking entirely happy he expanded, "After that he will be out on license which means if he breaks any of the conditions of his release he will be straight back inside. He won't be able to come near you ever again."

"How can you be sure of that? Don't people get released early for good behaviour as well?" Edward questioned not at all convinced by the detectives assurances as he was sure he had heard about criminals being released early and then reoffending on the news and while he really wanted to be able to trust the detective's words it sounded like everything they could have hoped for and his life just didn't work that way. There had to be a catch and Edward was sure James would be calculating enough to find any way possible to be released early if he was convicted and he had no doubts at all that he would then be able to find a way around his parole officer if anyone could.

"He will be well monitored I assure you. He heads anywhere near your direction and we will know about it and as for a life sentence of this severity, twenty years is the minimum term he will serve. That is the earliest possible release even if he behaves perfectly for his whole sentence which somehow I doubt will be the case anyway. He is far too volatile, if anything, he is likely to end up increasing his sentence by getting into fights." Detective Jenks tried to reassure him and while none of it was completely certain yet and couldn't be until after the trial the detective's confidence which was evident in his relaxed manner and cheerful expression was enough to finally let Edward begin to think of a different life to the one he had previously been picturing. Twenty years was a long time, especially with the possibility of it increasing to as much as twenty five or thirty. That was long enough that Lucy would get to grow up without the constant worry and moving a life on the run would undoubtedly result in. She would get to grow up with their family around them too and that was more than he had ever been able to hope for before. Bella squeezed his hand and he looked to her to find her smiling slightly and he could tell she trusted the detective's word, he could see it in her eyes, there was hope glinting where it had previously been fear.

Looking from her to his aunt and uncle and seeing the same happiness on their faces he finally managed to relax and shakily echo their smiles, allowing himself to feel the relief of knowing James wasn't going to be coming for him. The decision he had been agonising over was no longer needed, they could stay exactly where they were. He wouldn't need to break Lucy's heart or his own by taking her away from the family she loved. They were safe.

"What about the rest of them? Victoria, Riley and Laurent?" Emmett asked making Edward tense up again as he realized Victoria had not even been mentioned yet and he couldn't believe he had forgotten about her. He was sure she was crazy enough to still do James' bidding but he managed to relax again when the detective showed no signs of concern and continued to smile.

"Riley as you know has helped us considerably with our investigations, especially as he was the one to initially turn them all in. We don't believe him to be a danger to anyone now so I expect he will get community service and a fine for his part in the damage to the shop window and Bella's car. It will be much the same for Laurent; as far as we can prove his only part in the plan was to help with the monitoring of Edward's movements. He was legally employed at the law firm where Emmett worked before James even found him so the misuse of his time there that allowed them to delay Emmett is more a work matter and I believe he has been fired. Victoria however has been charged with conspiracy to murder which will hopefully be a jail term if found guilty as we believe she knew the whole plan right from the start judging by the comment she made to Bella at the school gates which we have several witnesses for." He explained before shifting in his seat a little as his expression became a bit more serious, "Now the only problem left is Edward Masen Senior and that is a little more complicated I am afraid. We tried to arrest him yesterday afternoon for the assault against Elizabeth Masen and attempting to prevent the course of justice which if he was found guilty could have resulted in an eighteen month jail sentence. Unfortunately, he would have known this and by the time we got to his house, he was gone and we haven't been able to track him down yet. We will keep looking for him but to be honest, I don't think you really need to worry about it. From what we have learnt of him it is unlikely he will show his face around here and just his absence helps our case against James Hadrian but if you do see him, let us know immediately and do not approach him yourselves."

"Is my mum ok?" Edward asked which took Esme and Carlisle a little by surprise but Bella just squeezed his hand a little in comfort. She could tell the state Elizabeth had been in when she had visited them had upset him so she wasn't surprised he was concerned for her. Alice and Emmett both seemed to be echoing his concern as Emmett frowned at the detective's news and Alice looked anxiously at him as he answered Edward's question.

"She seemed to be dealing with things well when we spoke to her. We did warn her not to go home and she assured us she had somewhere safe to stay so I would assume so. As I said, I really don't think there is anything to worry about from Edward Senior, he will know we want to speak to him and I don't think he will want to risk being caught."

"You're right; we won't be seeing him again. He is a coward." Esme agreed quickly completely sure of that fact as there was nothing left for him there other than a criminal conviction. "He wouldn't dare to show his face in the area now everyone knows just what a monster he is and Elizabeth will be just fine Edward; you don't need to be worrying over her."

He didn't seem quite so convinced but he didn't ask any more questions as Detective Jenks started going over just what would be happening next. The court case would be held at the end of May. James and Victoria would both be remaining in custody as bail had been denied on the grounds of them being a danger to the public and a flight risk. It was likely that Edward, Bella and Carlisle would all be called as witnesses along with Phil but he assured them that someone would be in touch to go through the process with them all and prepare them. Edward was a little dismayed to hear there was a chance Lucy would be needed to make a statement as well but Jenks was quick to reassure him that she would not be in the courtroom which made it a little easier to accept. He knew his little girl would be strong and happy to tell the prosecution what they wanted to know just so long as she didn't have to be anywhere near James ever again.

By the time Detective Jenks was leaving he had managed to thoroughly convince them all that the trail was nothing more than a formality as there was no way for James to wiggle his way out of the charges against him or their severity. Carlisle and Esme walked him to the door, thanking him for making the effort to keep them informed on what was going on along the way while Alice and Emmett disappeared to inform Jasper and Rosalie of the good news, leaving Bella and Edward alone.

"We won't need to leave." Edward murmured, still slightly unsure of the words as he spoke them as it would take some time for it all to truly sink in. Bella's smile helped though as she responded.

"No, we really won't. All that worrying you were doing was for nothing."

"You have no idea how thankful I am that that is the case." He sighed, and seeing he was still a little shaky, Bella pulled him into a hug.

"I think I do. I had never even considered that he actually meant to kill me before. I'm glad we don't have to worry about him coming back." She admitted making him hold onto her tighter as he hated the thought of the possibility he could have lost her like that and knew she needed the comfort just as much as he did.

"I'm so sorry for that." He murmured into her hair where his face was buried, inhaling her comforting scent. They were both alive, and James was locked away but the fear that was left behind was harder to banish even in light of the good news they had just received.

"No, it wasn't your fault and I would do it again if I had to, I'm just glad it won't be needed. We should be celebrating you know, it's over. He isn't coming back." She mumbled, trying to reign in her emotions. They had just received the best news they could have hoped for and they were both too busy thinking of what could have happened to be enjoying it.

"I know, it's just still sinking in I guess." Edward responded, pulling back enough so he could see her face. He could see she was making an effort to pull herself together and as she smiled half heartedly he returned it before glancing up as he heard movement in the doorway.

"It'll take time, it is a lot to take in and it's been a long day, maybe we should all be heading to bed for now. We can work on the celebrating part tomorrow when we are all a little less tired." Carlisle suggested looking at them both with concerned eyes as he and Esme rejoined them, having heard the end of their conversation.

"You're right, as usual." Edward commented as he had been tired before the detective had even turned up thanks to his restless day. Sleep was probably exactly what he needed to let his jumbled thoughts finally settle. Even so, he didn't want to be on his own with the emotions the detective had managed to stir up and he certainly didn't want Bella on her own knowing how bad her nightmares had been before so he didn't even give her chance to think about going home.

"You're staying." He told her firmly, catching the unsure look in her eyes and the worry that Carlisle's suggestion of going to bed had caused. They needed each other and he wasn't in the mood for arguing over whether it would hurt his shoulder or not so he was thankful when she just looked relieved and didn't try to insist on going home.

"Well we'll see you both in the morning then. Try and get some sleep, there's no need for worrying anymore. We'll collect the rest of your things from your flat tomorrow as planned and you can finally start putting all this mess behind you." Esme said as she moved across to hug each of them, hoping that they could both finally find some peace. Edward thanked her, not only for the offer of collecting his things but for all their continued support, more grateful than they could ever know for both her and Carlisle's presence in his life before wishing them goodnight and heading for his room with Bella by his side.

Curled up in bed together Bella slipped into sleep much easier than Edward. He had been quick to shush her protests when he had pulled her close, wrapping her securely in his arms and she had given in to the lure of the steady beat of his heart under her ear as she rested her head against his chest. The closeness reassured them both as they lay in the quiet room, each lost in their own thoughts of what could have been. The soft, silky feel of her hair under his fingertips as he played with the strands that tried to creep over her shoulder and into her eyes helped the wonders of what life would bring for them now gradually fight their way through and the comforting beat of his heart did the same for her, lulling her to sleep. Edward watched as her features relaxed into a soft smile and was glad peaceful dreams had found her but he still couldn't let go enough to find his own. There were too many things to think about, even with the relief of the knowledge that James couldn't come back for them finally starting to settle in, it just didn't feel real.

The last five years of his life had been spent taking each day as it came, only worrying about what it would take to keep going and ensuring Lucy's health and happiness. James' appearance had only added more worry and stress to his usual concerns but now all that was gone. Suddenly his life was no longer about struggling and that was an entirely alien concept to him. He could finally think about looking forward to things, to planning a future, to enjoying it. It was a strange feeling he didn't quite know how to accept.

His musing was interrupted however by his bedroom door being slowly pushed open. He looked up from Bella to see a very sleepy looking Lucy coming in and though her eyes travelled to where Bella lay asleep against his chest it didn't stop her from climbing up onto his bed on his other side.

"What you doing up baby? It's late." He asked quietly as he freed one arm from around Bella and lifted up the covers, allowing Lucy to shuffle in and cuddle up beside him as well.

"I heard voices." She mumbled, rubbing at her eyes before looking up at him and he could see the worry there so he kissed her forehead and wrapped his arm around her.

"That was just Detective Jenks. You remember him don't you?" He explained guessing she must have been woken by Esme and Carlisle seeing him out.

"Why was he here?" She asked quietly, being careful to keep her voice low since Bella hadn't stirred at all but unable to hide the fact that she did indeed remember the detective and him being there worried her. He only turned up when something bad had happened so when she had recognised his voice in the muffled conversation that had woken her up she had been unable to go back to sleep without first checking that her daddy was okay.

"He had some very good news for us. James is going to go to prison for a very long time." He told her, watching her closely for her reaction and it seemed she was far too sleepy to be questioning things as much as she usually would.

"He can't hurt you anymore?" Was all she asked.

"No, he can't hurt any of us ever again." He answered, the words finally ringing as true to him as he spoke them. Lucy must have seen that in his eyes too as after staring steadily at him for a moment, reading his expression, she looked away, content with cuddling into his side and letting her eyes fall shut, suitably reassured that everything was okay and too tired to fight sleep any longer.

Looking at his girls cuddled up to him Edward felt more content than he ever had before. The truth of what he had said to Lucy was still ringing in his ears and he realised that it really was finally all over. Tomorrow the rest of their things would be collected from the flat and that part of his life would effectively be over.

He had been an unwilling participant in James' game for far too long. A game that had been designed to leave the looser alone, destroyed and with no hope of escape but in the end it was James who had found himself on the wrong side of the final checkmate and it was Edward who was left to marvel at his win and the wonderful family he had been granted as the prize.

He would no longer have to struggle just to make ends meet or fight the constant loneliness that had always threatened to engulf him and he didn't have to live in fear of James hurting him again. Instead he would be living in a house that anyone would be proud to call home, surrounded by family who loved him and his daughter and he had a girlfriend he loved more than he thought possible who, however miraculously, felt the same way about him.

Kissing first Lucy's head and then Bella's, Edward tightened his arms around them both before allowing his eyes to fall shut. In the morning he would wake up to a new day, one where he could finally start living a life that was his own and he had realised that he didn't need to worry about what the future would bring. Whatever craziness he was sure Lucy and Bella would have in store for him, he would be ready for it, and he was going to enjoy every single second of it.


	54. Epilogue Scars And Souvenirs

Disclaimer: Anything Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer

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><p><strong>Epilogue – Scars And Souvineers<strong>

It was a warm sunny day, just right for an afternoon spent outside and Edward stood by the open living room doors as he watched the fun going on further down the garden. Lucy was giggling constantly and that alone was enough to bring the smile to Edward's face but the sight of her running around happily with Anna as Carlisle, Emmett, Garrett, Alice, Jasper, Peter, Rose, Renee and Phil all joined in their game of rounders was enough to make his smile grow so much it almost hurt.

He had been watching them for a while, happy to see Lucy being the centre of attention as he thought she should be despite the fact it was his own birthday party. So far he had been left in peace, everyone just glad to see him happy and all too eager to join in when the girls had asked to play. Esme, Elizabeth and Bella were also around although since they all needed food at some point they had retreated to the kitchen a while ago. Elizabeth's presence was the only aspect of the day Edward had had any say in, the rest he had left in the very capable hands of Bella, Lucy, Esme and Alice. He hadn't really had much interest in a party at all but everyone else had been in the mood to celebrate and when Esme and Bella had once found out that he had entirely ignored his last birthday altogether he had known he was beaten before he had even tried to argue. Now he was glad he had let them arrange it as after the ups and downs of the last couple of months it seemed they were all enjoying letting off some steam.

James' trail had been and gone resulting in him spending the next thirty five years in jail. He had been found guilty of both counts of attempted murder and as the judge had not been feeling at all sympathetic towards him after the details of the trail had been gone over he had received the maximum sentence for each. The trail had turned out to be tough on all of them though as their witness statements had lead to them going over things in great detail that they would rather have forgotten altogether. Bella's nightmares had returned with a vengeance and along with her college exams it hadn't been a good mix. Thankfully the appointment Carlisle had set up for her with a counselor had been able to help and after just the first few appointments she had finally been able to sleep so seeing the marked improvement in the dark circles under her eyes and her mood Edward had decided to follow her lead much to everyone else's relief.

It hadn't been easy, he disliked talking to a stranger about things he didn't much like thinking about full stop but in the end he had to admit that it had helped. Not only had it got him through the trail without him turning into a sleepless shell of himself but it had helped him come to terms with everything that had happened to him much more effectively. That had in turn managed to improve things considerably between himself and Emmett as with the stress of the trail getting to Edward it had shortened his temper even further than usual. That had unfortunately caused their relationship to remain volatile even after Edward's apology and desire to get on again and despite everyone else's best efforts at steering conversations away from trouble. He doubted they would ever forget what had happened but they could now at least spend time together without it turning into an argument which they all deemed a success.

The other major change the trail had bought about was Elizabeth. She had been there throughout the court case, sitting at the back of the gallery by herself. They had all seen her but no one had really known how to react to her presence. Esme had still been unable to bury her anger towards her sister as well as being worried about Edward's reaction should they try to interact with her which went for Emmett and Alice as well. She had looked to be ok, the bruising on her eye long gone and her clothes well put together once more so no one had felt the need to risk angering Edward to enquire how she was doing. Edward though had not felt the same. He had found his gaze drawn to her at times and while he had waited to feel the anger everyone else seemed to think should be there all he had actually felt was curiosity and sadness.

On the last day of the trail, after they had watched both James and Victoria receive life sentences, they had exited the court room to find Elizabeth standing there, worrying at the strap of her bag as she watched them all file into the corridor looking like a deer trapped in headlights. They had all paused, it was obvious she had been waiting for them and while no one seemed to know what to say Edward had looked around the worried faces of his family before turning to Bella who was holding his hand. She had smiled at him before letting go and gently nudging him forward. That had been all the encouragement he had needed to go to his mother and pull her into a hug. They had a lot to sort through, but if she was there and looking to them, he wasn't going to turn her away. She had given up everything she had known and endangered herself in a last attempt to save him which in the end had turned out to be incredibly successful and he was thankful to her for it.

It had been a little awkward at first, the rest of the family still hadn't totally warmed to her presence but Edward liked having her around. It wasn't the same as it used to be, she was fairly withdrawn around them all, always looking like she was waiting for them to turn her away but Edward kept inviting her back and had insisted that if he was having a party she had to be on the guest list. Even now he was a little worried how she would be getting on with Esme who still seemed to be having the most trouble forgiving her sister but Bella was with them which put his mind at ease as Bella was the complete opposite. She had taken to her instantly, something he was sure came from the night they had spent together sitting by his hospital bed.

A cheer sounded from down the bottom of the garden and Edward refocused his attention to see that Anna had just run around the last two bases to make it home. At his last count, that put the girls in the lead, something that amused him as they were playing boys versus girls and while the girls had a five and six year old on their team and the boys were all fully grown adults, he didn't think the boys were intentionally throwing the game to let them win. Emmett was not going to be happy when Lucy got around to celebrating their win if it kept up that way and he was quite looking forward to it since they had all been present for Lucy's gloating after the rounds of monopoly she had grown so fond of playing with Bella and himself. They had yet to beat her even with Bella's best attempts at preventing him from caving to Lucy's trade requests.

As he watched the guys try to regroup he couldn't help but think about how different the day had turned out to anything he could have imagined a year ago. It had been years since he had even bothered to celebrate his birthday and during his last one he would never have dreamed that just a year later the game going on in front of him could even be possible. It was overwhelming, a feeling he was beginning to become accustomed to since Esme and Carlisle had taken them in. Everything with them was always so much more than he could ever have imagined, but instead of being wary and uncomfortable he was steadily getting better at just accepting what they offered and being grateful for their care. It had been hard to adjust; he was so used to having to do everything for himself and finding ways to struggle through when things were hard. He hadn't liked feeling like his life was sliding out of his control and he now knew how awkward it had been for everyone to watch him struggle with it so he was glad he could finally understand that they were not trying to take over, but instead just offering the help he needed. Discovering his aptitude for doing the shops paperwork had helped. Being able to do that from home had enabled him to feel like he was at least doing something and not totally having to rely on others. That, along with the counselor and the piano had all been big turning points in his attitude. He now found it much easier to accept Esme and Carlisle's help with everything else and the house had been a much happier place for it. He had even managed to gracefully accept the driving lessons they had gifted him for his birthday that morning and the promise of a car when he passed his test, despite the exuberant cost.

"You ok? You've been standing there a while."

Bella's voice pulled him out from his musings and he turned his head to find her standing next to him, eying the way he was standing critically.

"I'm fine, come here." He answered, reassuring her with his smile as he got his arms around her waist and tugged her back against him so he could nuzzle into her neck, laying a gentle kiss there.

"You should be sitting down." She half heartedly chastised as she relaxed against him. It had been a crazy day with all the party preparations and it felt good to let him hold her for a minute or two.

"I've spent the last couple of months doing nothing but sitting down. I'm ok for a while longer. I promise I'll find a seat when I need to." He murmured, lifting his head back up as he heard Lucy be called up for her turn to bat. He had only been up and about on crutches for a couple of weeks so it was understandable that Bella would worry but he was still enjoying the newfound ability to stand. The cast was off and although his leg was still encased in a brace it allowed him to get around much easier. He did still tire quickly though causing the leg to ache and everyone to worry if he seemed to be trying to use it too much.

"Make sure you do, you don't want to mess up its healing and let those driving lessons go to waste." Bella teased, glancing back over her shoulder at him and seeing him grimace slightly at her words but he let it go and cheered for Lucy instead as her bat connected with the ball and she started running. The driving lessons after all did mean that in the long run he would have more independence as he wouldn't have to rely on everyone else for lifts to take Lucy to school and to get to work. He just had to keep reminding himself of that rather than focusing on how much it must be costing his Aunt and Uncle.

"Who's winning?" Bella asked as she too watched Lucy get a home run, cheering for her when she passed the last base.

"The girls." Edward answered happily making Bella laugh.

"Oh Emmett's going to love that." She commented before noticing with amusement one of the other guys who looked less than pleased, "I see Carlisle does too, I didn't expect him to be the competitive type."

"No, me neither." Edward agreed, spotting his Uncle who was scowling as the girls celebrated Lucy's run. Celebrations over with, Rosalie took her turn at batting so Edward returned his attention to Bella. "How are things in the kitchen?"

"Good, they were talking when I came out to check on you." She answered knowing he would be thinking about his mother, "You don't have to worry you know, they'll sort it out with time."

"I know, still can't help it though." He returned as he didn't want anything to scare Elizabeth away. He liked having her around despite all the awkwardness and he felt more than a little sorry for her. No one had heard anything from his father since the night Elizabeth had provoked him and though he couldn't be sorry about not having to see him again, it also meant that she was all on her own, something she had never had to experience up until that point. Knowing how terrible loneliness had made him feel he hated the idea of his mother going through that but any offers to help her had been turned down instantly. She seemed determined to stand on her own two feet and get her life in order so she had found herself a small flat and was job hunting, remaining firm in her decision to leave all the money Edward Senior had earned their family to the kids. Edward couldn't fault her for wanting to do it by herself so instead he was just trying to make sure she knew she was welcome to visit and was inviting her to do so as often as he could.

"Esme knows how much you like having Elizabeth here and secretly I think she likes it too, she's just not quite ready to let that show. She's got a lot more to forgive her for than you. Now stop worrying, this is your twenty first birthday party, you're meant to be having fun." Bella scolded, turning in his arms so she could drape hers around his neck, instantly chasing the worry out of his face as he smiled at her.

"I am, even more so now." He commented as he leant down the couple of inches needed to kiss her. The physical side of things was definitely one of the best points of agreeing to see a counselor. They still hadn't pushed things too far but he could now enjoy kissing her and the feeling of her body against his own without freaking out over how it made him feel and he certainly enjoyed testing his limits with it, something Bella didn't seem opposed to at all. Now he was up on his feet again he was looking forward to being able to take her out on a proper date and really start moving things forward in their relationship.

A tennis ball lightly bouncing off his head eventually reminded him that they were not on their own and he reluctantly pulled away from a vividly blushing Bella to see Renee holding a hand over both Lucy and Anna's eyes and grinning at the pair of them, along with everyone else, their game apparently over. Hearing everyone's laughter at their embarrassment from being caught getting carried away and wanting to see what was going on, Lucy ducked away from Renee. On seeing Bella's blush and the bright smile on her daddy's face she guessed what they had been doing as It had become a pretty regular occurrence any time they were left alone for more than five minutes and rolled her eyes before running towards Edward to tell him they had won and that she was hungry. He picked her up for a hug and as everyone else joined them and they headed for the kitchen he knew he couldn't have wished for a better birthday.

The last five years had been the hardest of his life and he would always carry the scars from them but with Lucy in his arms, Bella by his side and their family surrounding him, he wouldn't have changed them. The scars had led him to the people who meant the world to him and for that he would always be thankful.

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_AN - So there we have it! It feels weird to finally be finished writing this story, I've been doing it for so long and had so many points where it didn't feel like I'd ever manage to finish it. A massive thank you goes to everyone who has read this, especially to those of you who have been with me since the day I posted the very first chapter, without your comments I never would have finished this. _

_I hope I haven't disappointed you with where it ended, it was where it was always meant to finish even with the two year gap of being unable to write it. That being said, there may be a few future takes if inspiration strikes me again, so if you're interested in those make sure you keep this on story alert as I've no idea when I'll get those done._

_Once again, thank you! I'm so grateful that you have taken the time to read my story. I hope you have enjoyed it :)_


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